How To Avoid Shame-Based Parenting - Dr. Kelly Flanagan

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 27 ส.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 20

  • @jenniferboyd2200
    @jenniferboyd2200 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    So true. As I have worked on forgiving myself and Jesus has set me free, I have started to become the parent I like, have the warm open family interactions I've always dreamed of. ❤

  • @sierra4883
    @sierra4883 6 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    I don't think saying if you dont do "such and such this is the outcome" is shaming your child because whether our kids like it or not there are consequences for our actions, good or not. I think a better example would have been why can't you just get good grades like so and so or why can't you listen for once. That is shaming.

    • @alyseceleste
      @alyseceleste 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yes!!!

    • @bufficliff8978
      @bufficliff8978 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      The shaming is in how it's said and when it's said. If a child asks why they have to do homework then you explain why the work is important. If the kid isn't doing homework and you choose to manipulate by saying they'll fail your future expectations for them if they don't do their homework that night--THAT is the shaming they're talking about.

  • @designedwithfaith6298
    @designedwithfaith6298 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I couldn't help but have a ton of questions about the right way to respond or react to my children. I think we could learn something from God's reaction to the first sin way back in Eden. Haven't thought on it yet, but feel we could learn from God's reaction to different people's sins throughout the Bible. So much to learn, but still God is so good!

  • @DellTewahdo
    @DellTewahdo 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I can’t wait to read his book “Loveable”

  • @romanapintek3596
    @romanapintek3596 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Amazing videos. Thank you so much focus on the family. 🙌🏻⚓️

  • @danderson7182
    @danderson7182 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Always great content 💯💯💯

  • @noryloydnarvaez327
    @noryloydnarvaez327 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Content is great but might be helpful for editors/producers to actually measure the number of minutes Jim talks and the total minutes the guest actually speaks. Has to have a general proportion.

  • @fordmusclecar
    @fordmusclecar 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Love this

  • @April.King11
    @April.King11 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Where is the line between shaming your kids over bad grades vs pushing them to do better because you know they can and have before? My kids have gotten to the point they ask to pray over their grades and I feel terrible but it is also my job to ensure that they do the best they can even if that means I have to pull out the rod? If this is incorrect, please tell me!

    • @bufficliff8978
      @bufficliff8978 ปีที่แล้ว

      Rebuild your relationship with them. If you know they're capable of more but they're choosing to do less they might be feeling relationally detached and like you care more about performance than you care about them.
      If there's something they're passionate about then help them find volunteer positions or jobs they can have to develop those and be useful. They might genuinely be academically bored if they used to do better than they are now.
      If they feel like their efforts are pointless they won't want to work hard.

    • @katiescott4166
      @katiescott4166 ปีที่แล้ว

      Absolutely pray over their grades. Just pray that they know their worth. Encourage them to rely on Him. And to know their worth through him 😊

  • @shermainewilson1
    @shermainewilson1 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    My daughter's school has mentioned that if she doesn't perform up to standards they will give her a special education. How do I motivate my child without shaming her?

    • @theynot4u
      @theynot4u 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Pray! I had a son in a similar position and I would pray that he have the mind of Christ in all situations. He's a young adult now and doing well.

    • @jupiternativeson1
      @jupiternativeson1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      With love and understanding, try looking back at yourself as a child and speak to her as you would have wanted to be be spoken to a when you were her age.

    • @bufficliff8978
      @bufficliff8978 ปีที่แล้ว

      If she needed special help that's nothing to be ashamed of. Some kids need extra help at different stages of development.

  • @advondahunter5550
    @advondahunter5550 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👍🏾

  • @jennr8235
    @jennr8235 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Capital S. Please explain

  • @CK-bk9es
    @CK-bk9es 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Great content. Would have been a great interview if the interviewer would let the guest speak without interruption.