I'm still trying to find reasons why I would be mistyped but I relate to everything said about infj's... It's not about being understood for me, it's about pressure.
SAME it felt like a support group. I couldn’t understand why I although I craved connection at the same time I couldn’t accomplish it. Now I’m more level headed, and still working on not trying to set up boundaries without feeling guilty or like I’m not accomplishing my purpose.
I am an INFJ male who grew up in a time before such things were even known in the general public. It's been very difficult. I'm 64 now and I have slowly come to realize that I'm very alone in my thinking and have never found anyone who I can connect to on a deep leo. Nobody genuine really seems to be able to want ro go that deep.
I am a 66 year old INFJ male and have struggled as well. When Alexis said you need to meet 100 people to find one that you can talk to, it feels accurate. I went to a seminary near New York City hoping to increase the odds of meeting people I have could have conversations with. I met my partner there (she's an INFP) and we've been together 22 years. But I still struggle. There just aren't that many people that want to go deep.
We want to live as if we don't have human bodies or human needs. Personally, I have been wanting to get laser hair removal so that it's one less human grooming thing that I have to do. I'm an INFJ female
If an INFJ has food, and somebody else is there, they would rather give that food to them rather than eat it themselves. That is how not taking care of yourself can help people. The problem with this is that if you are always that way, you will die, and you won't be able to help as many people in life because you are dead because you didn't eat anything.
I found Wenzes she's a INFJ life coach with a bunch of phenomenal videos if you're wanting to learn more. She's helped me throughout this past year immensely, felt so alone before finding this stuff.
I haven't quite watched it all yet, but I wanted to say, really good point at 22:32 about coupling Fe and Se. In my life (as a 57-year-old INFJ) it's been Se activities that has gotten me out of the house, out of my inner world, and exposed me to lots of fun and rewarding interactions with people the most. We're talking music (being in bands, orchestras or vocal groups), sports, hiking, the gym, rock climbing, drawing and watercolors, ... the list is endless. Choose something that interests you, take classes and/or self-practice at it, find others who also share that interest, and let Se open the door for Fe to shine. I think I've been fortunate to have parents that encouraged me to develop Se from a young age to build more confidence in doing those things. But it's never too late. I now teach watercolor painting to adults my age or older just learning it. Really great insights here, one of the best explanations of INFJ and their cognitive functions I've heard.
This woman’s knowledge - and wisdom - amazes me. She’s touched on so many behaviours that I display as an INFJ- particularly the self sacrificing switch- I try so please everyone except myself but then at a certain point I feel taken for granted - I snap and lay into people for exploiting my kindness. The self criticism too! Just the other day when my husband told me I don’t take criticism well I admitted that he was completely right , but I told him that it’s because I’m so critical of myself that I just can’t take anymore criticism. And the idealizing people - I totally do that ! And finding people who want to discuss political, social, or philosophical issues - not easy! Thank God my husband and son both use Ni - we have some great conversations.
This is by far the best analysis of an INFJ personality type I've ever seen on TH-cam! I remember confirming multiple times that I'm certainly an INFJ, I've spent a lot of time reading and watching videos about this type, getting some incredible insights... but that part about 'reading people easliy'? Nahh, that seemed way off for me to the point where I thought I might be autistic because other INFJ personality traits kinda work well with that idea. Turns out I've been just skipping Fe usage and going full Ti a bit too much. I've had some bad interpersonal experiences in my early life so I've just persuaded myself that I'm terrible with people and should instead focus on building up some practical skills and be a master of them so that would make people reach out to me even if I'm not that likeable. I even became a professional scooter rider, the first one in my country - wonder if that Se is even higher that 10% for me now. What's interesting people usually were praising my interesting trick ideas and critisizing how I was sometimes looking a bit unnatural on a scooter. And I've never seen it as a pure sport, as a pure physical activity but more of an art form, closer to dancing and figure skating than to, let's say, swimming or boxing. Anyway, lately I've been using my second function more frequently and efficiently as I'm gradually transitioning from being a player into being a trainer. And it feels like this is where I belong more and more. I very rarely post comments under such videos (because - oh no! - personal stuff! - people will judge me! - and think I'm weird! haha) but this time I can't hold back. Thank you! Especially for the explaining issues with Fe, haven't heard that before for some reasons and it definitely helped me to have a more balanced look at how I used to interact with people (or rather, not interact haha)
Your impression of an INFJ voice had me laughing! This is the same impression of that everyone does of me. It made for a wonderful career as a secretary for a hospital. I can't count how many times the person on the other end of the line mentioned how my tone and voice alone offered them great comfort.
I have recently found out I am an INFJ and it has gifted me with loads of peace I needed. Honestly, I have felt so weird and different my whole life (currently 30) I often wondered if there was something fundamentally wrong with me and my way of thinking. Everything you talked about resonated so deeply, I am always aware of the way people feel and can even predict how things are going to play out, kinda creepy. I have found myself flipping the switch as you said and cutting people off after putting up with too much and spitting out truths nobody dared to talk about, especially with my family, which hasn't always been beneficial. I have had multiple narcissists around and drain me for years, those of you that know... you know! I have finally put my foot down to not allowing them back into my life anymore and try and find more reciprocal friendships. Always been highly critical, constantly in that introverted thinking. Also, I do wear all black, and dark red lipstick a lot, it's my go to, it's so funny how spot on that was. Have always been labeled as gothic and darkish, actually I have naturally dark brown hair and very fair skin so people would mock me saying i looked like Morticia Addams, being a young INFJ in school and high school was fucking grueling, man! Very much into spirituality and personal growth, I thrive on deep conversations, it's when I feel most like myself and like I can say things that I otherwise only share with myself in my head. Anyways, THANK YOU for this and the book recommendations, would actually love it if you would please be so kind as to share other books that you believe we'd enjoy! Much love!
I took the Myers-Briggs test shortly after an ego collapse and was INTJ. I also had a full psych exam around the same time and had no issues other than mild depression and anxiety. This was after a lifetime labelled with multiple physical illnesses and mental health problems like schizoid personality and Bipolar disorder. I do think before the ego collapse, which was a gift, I likely fell into INFJ category. I have done my research and the best explanation I can give is that I was codependent to a codependent, scapegoated, and isolated beyond my will. Now, finally learning more about this, and Jung. Thank you so much for the detailed explanations. I am really healthy now. Get up and move is great advice. Also, love to INFJs.
Because we are empaths. They love us because we have the qualities they desire (but do not have) but they are also jealous of it so they also will eventually hate us for it.
This was so powerful and helpful to me. As an INFJ (99% sure) who has mostly fought against my typing, I appreciated the kindness you exude towards us. I felt "called out" but in a way that felt wonderful. I felt seen, good and bad, but in an understanding and accepting kind of way which helped me to feel more warmth and less criticism toward my flaws/quirks. Your advice was spot on and has given me a LOT to think and do about. I'm grateful I came across your channel. Thanks for sharing your wisdom!
This was EYE-OPENING! I completely understand the icy side of my personality. It's like I go rogue, taking all my perspectives into account, remembering any painful experiences with that person, then unleashing a barrage of multilayered logic in order to erect an inescapable conclusion around my target, and squeeze till it hurts. Then, upon reflecting, feel horrible for shattering thier soul. That said, sometimes it is warranted. And yet, I do not revel in such exchanges. However, I find myself more likely to use such on behalf of another, rather than for myself, as I feel more pain vicariously through others. Especially when I can tell that they aren't capable of standing up for themselves. I will go thermal nuclear on bully types harassing others. Just thinking about it as I write this has my adrenaline begining to surge. It doesn't feel logical but visceral. Anyways... Perhaps I ought to do some meditation. I enjoyed your video. You are great at breaking it down into parts, then building up into a clear conclusion. Very informative. Thank you for taking the time to expand my understanding of, well, me. Take care and God bless. ✝️
I love that an INTJ has tackled these topics. You folks have amazing brains at organizing and structuring. This is a clean and well put together channel. Thanks for doing this. I love this video on INFJs. It's a concise and succinct honest overview of their personality, which I have studied thoroughly due to being mistyped as one while also being 5w4. Have you gone down the Enneagram rabbit hole yet? I would love to see how you arrange and articulate that whole topic and then see how it pairs with cognitive functions. Also, purely selfish request here 😅 could you go in more in depth with the male INFP? Keep up the good work. This is becoming a top channel of mine. I just followed you on IG as well and may entertain the idea of a personal one on one. Thank you!
Thank you so much for the kind feedback!! Yes I've definitely dabbled a bit in the enneagram! My video th-cam.com/video/jIVqCzMUWRM/w-d-xo.html compares enneagram to cognitive functions a little bit & also my enneagram 5 video th-cam.com/video/jCXBIrLH_QE/w-d-xo.html but I haven't done a holistic one for INFP for example :) That's a great idea about the male INFP video!! Thanks so much again!!! 🥳
I found you when looking for an explanation of my wife's type (ESFJ), and your explanation is so crystal clear, I just HAD to hear about me too. Thank you for sharing!
The first test I took was in a general career prep course in college, and I got INFJ. I took a test a few years afterwards out of curiosity and got INFP. I do notice that I have traits of the INFJ but because of it's rarity and the likelihood of the mistyping I tend to believe I'm an INFP.. but I end up seeking info on both just in case. I notice that I'm maybe more concerned with other people's emotions and perspective than most INFP's so maybe INFJ is accurate. Who knows
uhm, idk i have had a habit of focusing too much on other people’s feelings and making sure they’re comfortable. like, giving somebody older my seat when i can automatically catch cues of them trying to find a seat w/o them mentioning it. i tend to lean towards making others feel very comfortable and lean away from my own comfort to be a “savior” to them. but i’ve recently been trying to also take care of my own inner world recently. 🤷♀️ i also tend to be really confused of my inner world and defining myself even though i’m too much in my head and write poetry to articulate my inner world more. it’s contradicting, so i’m confused and keep doubting myself with infp vs infj. even isfj sometimes smh. but what helps me differentiate me between isfj and infj is how i initiate the deep, intellectual conversations between me and my friend ALWAYS. still haven’t found THE difference beyween infj and infp.
When I discovered that I was an INFJ, I finally felt a sense of belonging. And when I researched more on this topic everything fell into place. Our superpower NI. Ability to sense and see the future. High sensitivity. Introversion. Relating to other personality types such as INTJ, INFP, ENFJ, Etc.
❤️INTJs❤️ Just going by the title, I JUST started advocating for myself and BOY has it been terrifying, made me feel like an imposter, but so freeing and uplifting at the same time
I've often forgotten to eat, then suddenly I feel lightheaded and try to analyze why I'm feeling that way.😂 I work in healthcare, picking up on all of the feelings from staff and patients, gets to be taxing, so I really value my days off. I usually isolate to recharge, a nice bike ride on mountain trails is an excellent way to do that!
I love how you explained everything. I struggle to find someone who would actually give advice on how to strengthen our weak points and get out of loops as clearly as you do. You have no idea how helpful this video is, thank you sooo much. I have been reflecting a lot about how I can improve myself and I do have a problem with taking care of my body and my needs, I tend to neglect anything that is not intellectual or contributing to the future, so you're completely right I need to step back a bit from my introversion and focus on the daily habits, focus on my body health and participate in more social activities. ❤️❤️ Also, you made me realize how my Ti has been torturing me all these years with all the self-criticism. Thank youuu
So I’m an INFP, but when you explain the care of peoples needs and harmony that’s me, but the way I use to handle conflict is how you explained after weeks shit gets icy. Oh boy. Does it! Haven’t been in a situation where I can tell if I have grown, but interesting. I’m still learning, so it can be relative .
wait, did you just say 1 out of 99 😅 the more people i meet, the more i see how hurtful people are. my relationship with "world" is probably unhealthy from meeting people. and when i meet people i try to give them the benefit of the doubt while they unload "things ive never told other people" on me. exhausting meeting people.
Omg I definitely don’t drink enough water apparently. I also always feel tired and not enough energy. I’m not a hypochondriac but do have social anxiety. I am an idealist and realize that could actually sometimes be a bad thing. Same with not wanting to hurt anyone’s feelings.
The kidney pain, this is so real 🤣 My mom is a sensor (ESFJ) and was very much disturbed by my detachment from my body and the physical world in general. The kidney comment made me feel seen.
I discovered your channel 2 days ago, Alexis. I have actually been waiting for this video and have contemplated messaging you about it, but I noticed it was going to happen soon enough (Ni lol). The structure of the video and the general insights are very useful for me. Thank you for distilling the information so clearly and for the personal examples/stories! As an INFJ 5w4, I started realizing this year that balancing out is better (for me) than solely focusing on few functions (e.g. skipping Fe or Se). I say this after thinking for a long time that focusing on Ni-Ti with some Fe-Se sprinkled randomly would work well enough. However, I noticed I am a better mathematician when my Fe-Se needs are met, and not only my Ni-Ti ones. While balancing in general can be challenging due to the varying nature of life itself, I highly encourage (as you said) that everyone tries it for themselves.
I have to agree with you extremely critical with myself I never hardly ever allow myself to get overly excited or even excited really because I know as soon as I do something bad's going to happen it happens every time so I keep myself in check my co-workers looking me all the time they're like why you do that yourself why do you say that I don't know folks I can't explain it myself all I know is it just happens and I keep myself in line I'm kind of catching onto the second letter third letter combining fighting each other back and forth and it is crazy it is hard I never really thought about it so if the way you're explaining it now bless your heart thank you so much I don't know if you know what it is to have a joy like Theirs to have such a burden off your chest that you just never could figure out or explain yourself or anybody else❤
I hear you, fellow INFJ here. My coworkers and boss are always telling me to stop being so hard and demanding on myself. I feel like I cannot help it either 😶🌫
This made things clear up for me, and gave me so many aspects of myself I should work on but are too afraid to admit. I'm so happy I found this video, you made it so easy to understand and digest, everything made sense, you're amazing, thank you so much.
My two favorites are INFJ and INTJ. I am an ENTP. I always feel misunderstood by most people. But when it comes to these two, INFJ trusts me from the get go! INTJ, on the other hand, takes some time and then they trust me.
hey, im an enfj hi! i just wanted to say that you seem like the kindest and most open minded intj i've met so far, and I haven't met a lot of intj's. the other intj's i met are very.. questionable.
I love that you explain the fondation of cognitive fonction in each personality video. You really are a good teacher and I understand everytime each personality better ! Muchas gracias !
I can try to feel and relate to what you just tried to mention above. Myself being a male INFJ, It's like, we being empaths, deep thinkers and feelers observe and absorb energy from around. We are on toes to give our best shot no matter in what sort of pathetic situation we are dealing with in our personal lives. Our thoughts get processed in brains more faster than we can speak/express whenever interacting and expressing our emotions to someone and coz of this we end up as we are unable to explain exactly what are we want to express. Our complex nature makes people believe we are awkward and have intimidating personality coz we love to be alone oftenly to rejuvenate ourselves as get togethers, crowded places, small talks and irrelevant interactions drain our energies to a great extent. It takes a great courage to be a lone wolf in this era and stand by yourself no matter how much grief we carry in ourselves and face the world. We keep our ethics, morals on top of the list when it comes to chosing between right and wrong and taking a stand for others. There's a lot more more to this as it's a blend of never ending feelings and emotions. Stay Blessed!!!!
INFJ- INTJ but emotionless when it comes to internal processing of feelings, INTJ but a bit more self-aware, INTJ but striving for utopia instead of just technologically very advanced society, INTJ but more forgiving, INTJ but a bit less assertive, INTJ but a bit more socially extraverted, INTJ but having issues with life's purpose more often... - ex INTP and INTJ mystype of an INFJ(Ni-Ti)
Yea you got us pegged. I can't stand flashy close, love nice feeling quality close. About the Extraverted sensing if you a male INFJ you find its necessary to go to large groups to try and meet girls, not easy, but needed. The extraverted sensing is needed, but taxing, have to find ways to ways to balance it all out. Running is one of the post powerful things I have done to balance things outs when you get emotionally loaded. Be careful of going towards the occult, INFJs are very sensitive to things in the spiritual realms. Okay I will stop before I start to ramble, thank you for your videos, you make awesome content. Your are wonderful INTJ, you give so much back to people!
I understand what you mean about finding other people you can talk to about the things you like to talk about, having Ni as a preference. I have one INFJ friend, I'm an ENFJ, and she is exceptionally easy for me to keep a conversation going with.
Thank you so much for this video, I never realized why I would sit there and sense all the emotions in a room. Always thought I was freak, I sense the rooms emotions like one would smell a fragrance. The older I get the more I work my inter logic and group sensing.
I wish I understood the cognitive functions long ago. I do take criticism very personally, even if it's not. Learning more about being an INFJ really makes sense of my current relationships... and, yeah, I do door slam and am learning more about my relationship with a narcissist.
Found out I was an INFJ a while back. With taking the test and going through the results. It’s great being able to feel understood. When you’re talking about the spiritual side of things. I like to think of myself as a spiritual explorer. Lol I try to stay on the light side of things but it’s funny as I have friends that are into the darker side of spirituality. They have told me that they enjoy talking because even though I can challenge them I don’t make them feel rejected. Anyways great video
Thank you! You are right some INFJ's depending on their upbringing can balance all 4. But I am very direct and do not sugarcoat anything, especially a break-up lol. Empathy is something I was born with thus being a Empath which I did not know anything about until 3yrs ago.
no but listen. once I started taking care of my health and exercising, in addition to work and passion projects, now I don’t have ANY energy left for people (apart from a couple close ones) 😆 just the thought of going out to meet someone just to meet them… drains me to no end. it’s either one or the other, never both lol
Im so fucking thankful I found this, my partner is an INFJ and Im an ENFJ - this honestly makes me understand her more further. As she avoids voicing out.
One time this woman on a dating website about did yours go ask me about my interests, and I told her that I was currently intrigued and studying light spectrum , she act like I was from a different planet hahaha more like a different dimension. Then I was in the Star Trek for a long time now anthropology is my jam, always had been. We are wired differently like. Beautiful defiance:; salmon swimming upstream..
Thank you! I'm an INFJ But I love to work out and keep a routine as best as possible, I don't mind cleaning but my room is always messy! lol! I do meditate, and I hope that grounds my energy to be in the present moment, INFJ can seem extroverted when their with a group of people their comfortable with and show their true leadership skills giving everyone an equal job and directing them to that when were feeling inclined and ambitious. Also if were feeling really comfortable with SE and FE combo we will really be frank speaking our mind and it might be totally opposite of how people perceive us, we have very heavy deep thoughts and intense opinions and almost be aggressive? Especially if we don't agree with something or someone, we love sticking up for the under dog! We can at times give off such a sweet innocent vibe that people are like woah when the other side is shown! lol! See the thing about INTJ is everyone expect them to be cold but they can be more in touch with their feelings then INFJ because we absorbs others emotions and place it upon ourselves like a chameleon adapting to the room as quick as possible or not depends. Were INTJ ain't faking that shit and they express that emotion directly, whether they like something or not. Like a Vulcan their emotions run really deep! Not that INFJ don't feel emotions they do, sometimes I feel we can lose what is truly ours and verse what's someone else's. With an INTJ you get what you see! it's like an INTJ The layers is deep emotion that's not perceived by many and INFJ the oppsite, the bubbly sunshine shit, and then we fucking flip and it's jarring to people! lol!
Wow I've been listening to a lot of MBTI content in the past few years and this video is really gold. Everything is well explained and it's not boring. I'm definitely subscribing to your channel, glad I've found it !!
INFJ male, Ive spent a lot of time alone in my life. Cars are big in my life and intensity for me, much of my time spent doing autobody. I paint in a shop for a living as Ive gotten older and life not handing me the best Ive gotten less active in my regular free time with age. Ive learned this about me recently being infj. Im still a work in progress and trying to understand myself and yes Ive known a long time I struggle with balance. Thanks for your explanations here, I'll likely watch this a few times....
Can’t say I’ve ever dressed gothic or bothered with red lipstick. I’m blond and stick with preppy clothing in public or hoodies at home. I do enjoy good, cute fashion. Definitely need to be more active and get out more though lol
This is excellent. Thank you for your frankness regarding some of the more nuanced behaviors of the INFJ. On target right down to the black hair and black clothing. 😅
It's funny, as a 4w3 INFJ I am oriented towards external feelings and their harmony, and through that I try to understand my own harmony, in me there is no harmony, if there is no harmony on the outside
Truly, an INFJ should be the only one to explain an INFJ. Know what I mean? This is not to take away from your antics but rather to challenge you. So many use INFJ in the title for views. It’s just frustrating to see someone who’s claim their opinions are factual when explaining a complete stranger.
I appreciate how knowledgeable you are about the MBTI.... I have to chuckle because I'm having an astrological reaction to listening to you - I feel like you must have a lot of AIR in your astrological make-up, because your speed of talking makes this EARTH girl dizzy. I can't keep up.
The last section on style and breakups doesn't sound like INFJ to me. I much prefer outfits that suit my colouring and aren't any kind of trend such as goth or vintage, nothing that makes me stand out. Simple and quietly elegant is my style. Also the breakups aren't as nice as you describe. All my weirdness is on the inside. Hope that's helpful 😊xx
My two cents! Infj- A that’s me. Sigma male:door slamming/ over thinking and then some/ going into a rage sometimes for unnecessary stuff you are a infj-A congratulations 🎉 and also good luck 🍀. Your power and cursed. ✌🏻
New favorite channel for explaining things in a concrete way. Thank you for pointing out ways we can work on things tangibly. Infp male dating Infj female.
1:30 I was mistyped as an infp, and I took knowing certain values as Fi. Turnes out I do not ever know how I actually feel until it beats me over the head because I’m so focused on everyone else having a grand old time. I really have to sit and think about what it is that I’m feeling and why. Other infps I know seem to be able to tell you exactly what they are feeling and why nearly on the spot.
I often thought about turning that light switch that you are mentioning and being icy but even then I stop myself because I know it is mean. I don't like hurting people on purpose.
The only mistype I've ever gotten is, once or twice, coming up as an INTJ... other than that it's been INFJ the few dozen times I've taken the test (over the years).
When I found out I am an INFJ it changed me….I cried….I finally felt understood.
I'm still trying to find reasons why I would be mistyped but I relate to everything said about infj's... It's not about being understood for me, it's about pressure.
Saaaame! Felt understood for the first time ever
Same ☺️
I stop struggling with my self image and became more happy all the time
SAME it felt like a support group. I couldn’t understand why I although I craved connection at the same time I couldn’t accomplish it.
Now I’m more level headed, and still working on not trying to set up boundaries without feeling guilty or like I’m not accomplishing my purpose.
I was elated. I felt understood for the first time in my life. I gave myself permission to be me.
I am an INFJ male who grew up in a time before such things were even known in the general public. It's been very difficult. I'm 64 now and I have slowly come to realize that I'm very alone in my thinking and have never found anyone who I can connect to on a deep leo. Nobody genuine really seems to be able to want ro go that deep.
I am a 66 year old INFJ male and have struggled as well. When Alexis said you need to meet 100 people to find one that you can talk to, it feels accurate. I went to a seminary near New York City hoping to increase the odds of meeting people I have could have conversations with. I met my partner there (she's an INFP) and we've been together 22 years. But I still struggle. There just aren't that many people that want to go deep.
INFJ lives in the spiritual world.
As Sting said "we are spirits in the material world"
We want to live as if we don't have human bodies or human needs. Personally, I have been wanting to get laser hair removal so that it's one less human grooming thing that I have to do. I'm an INFJ female
@@infjintegrityvsnarcissism7295 Yeah, I'm a lot like Sting.
Infj here. Talking to Angels, loving humanity❤
By far the most pleasant MBTI channel. Very simple and elegant way of explaining!
My wife is an INFJ. This really helps. So accurate, even down to the point they don't drink enough water.
*INFJ drinks water after reading this. Thanks for the reminder 🙃😅
OMG
This so true and hilarious. I never drink enough water. I get dehydrated and still forget to drink
I had to download an app to remind me to drink water💀🥲
Same
If an INFJ has food, and somebody else is there, they would rather give that food to them rather than eat it themselves. That is how not taking care of yourself can help people. The problem with this is that if you are always that way, you will die, and you won't be able to help as many people in life because you are dead because you didn't eat anything.
I found Wenzes she's a INFJ life coach with a bunch of phenomenal videos if you're wanting to learn more. She's helped me throughout this past year immensely, felt so alone before finding this stuff.
I haven't quite watched it all yet, but I wanted to say, really good point at 22:32 about coupling Fe and Se. In my life (as a 57-year-old INFJ) it's been Se activities that has gotten me out of the house, out of my inner world, and exposed me to lots of fun and rewarding interactions with people the most. We're talking music (being in bands, orchestras or vocal groups), sports, hiking, the gym, rock climbing, drawing and watercolors, ... the list is endless. Choose something that interests you, take classes and/or self-practice at it, find others who also share that interest, and let Se open the door for Fe to shine. I think I've been fortunate to have parents that encouraged me to develop Se from a young age to build more confidence in doing those things. But it's never too late. I now teach watercolor painting to adults my age or older just learning it.
Really great insights here, one of the best explanations of INFJ and their cognitive functions I've heard.
This woman’s knowledge - and wisdom - amazes me. She’s touched on so many behaviours that I display as an INFJ- particularly the self sacrificing switch- I try so please everyone except myself but then at a certain point I feel taken for granted - I snap and lay into people for exploiting my kindness. The self criticism too! Just the other day when my husband told me I don’t take criticism well I admitted that he was completely right , but I told him that it’s because I’m so critical of myself that I just can’t take anymore criticism. And the idealizing people - I totally do that ! And finding people who want to discuss political, social, or philosophical issues - not easy! Thank God my husband and son both use Ni - we have some great conversations.
This is the clearest explanation of how INFJs are.
This is by far the best analysis of an INFJ personality type I've ever seen on TH-cam!
I remember confirming multiple times that I'm certainly an INFJ, I've spent a lot of time reading and watching videos about this type, getting some incredible insights... but that part about 'reading people easliy'? Nahh, that seemed way off for me to the point where I thought I might be autistic because other INFJ personality traits kinda work well with that idea. Turns out I've been just skipping Fe usage and going full Ti a bit too much.
I've had some bad interpersonal experiences in my early life so I've just persuaded myself that I'm terrible with people and should instead focus on building up some practical skills and be a master of them so that would make people reach out to me even if I'm not that likeable. I even became a professional scooter rider, the first one in my country - wonder if that Se is even higher that 10% for me now. What's interesting people usually were praising my interesting trick ideas and critisizing how I was sometimes looking a bit unnatural on a scooter. And I've never seen it as a pure sport, as a pure physical activity but more of an art form, closer to dancing and figure skating than to, let's say, swimming or boxing.
Anyway, lately I've been using my second function more frequently and efficiently as I'm gradually transitioning from being a player into being a trainer. And it feels like this is where I belong more and more.
I very rarely post comments under such videos (because - oh no! - personal stuff! - people will judge me! - and think I'm weird! haha) but this time I can't hold back. Thank you! Especially for the explaining issues with Fe, haven't heard that before for some reasons and it definitely helped me to have a more balanced look at how I used to interact with people (or rather, not interact haha)
Your impression of an INFJ voice had me laughing! This is the same impression of that everyone does of me. It made for a wonderful career as a secretary for a hospital. I can't count how many times the person on the other end of the line mentioned how my tone and voice alone offered them great comfort.
INFJ male - rare gem and I feel seen ❤😂
Same here😂
I am an INFJ and feel so alone and complete misunderstood all the time, have been my whole life. I am 49 now, it has been a solo life journey.
I have recently found out I am an INFJ and it has gifted me with loads of peace I needed. Honestly, I have felt so weird and different my whole life (currently 30) I often wondered if there was something fundamentally wrong with me and my way of thinking. Everything you talked about resonated so deeply, I am always aware of the way people feel and can even predict how things are going to play out, kinda creepy. I have found myself flipping the switch as you said and cutting people off after putting up with too much and spitting out truths nobody dared to talk about, especially with my family, which hasn't always been beneficial. I have had multiple narcissists around and drain me for years, those of you that know... you know! I have finally put my foot down to not allowing them back into my life anymore and try and find more reciprocal friendships. Always been highly critical, constantly in that introverted thinking. Also, I do wear all black, and dark red lipstick a lot, it's my go to, it's so funny how spot on that was. Have always been labeled as gothic and darkish, actually I have naturally dark brown hair and very fair skin so people would mock me saying i looked like Morticia Addams, being a young INFJ in school and high school was fucking grueling, man! Very much into spirituality and personal growth, I thrive on deep conversations, it's when I feel most like myself and like I can say things that I otherwise only share with myself in my head. Anyways, THANK YOU for this and the book recommendations, would actually love it if you would please be so kind as to share other books that you believe we'd enjoy! Much love!
INFP male here, been mistyped too many times as an INFJ, thank you for this video, it made everything much more clear!
As an INTJ, I believe my Mom is an INFJ. It always seems I have conversations with her that I can't really have with anyone else.
Oh wow, that must be so nice!
“Gonna try to explain the difference in ONE sentence “ and then does it, nonchalantly!! I love it when she does these genius insightful move. 💙💙
My mom is an INFJ and I’ve never heard a more accurate description 🤣♥️
Hey, what are your thoughts on growing up with an INFJ mother? Genuinely curious, I am an INFJ myself.
I took the Myers-Briggs test shortly after an ego collapse and was INTJ. I also had a full psych exam around the same time and had no issues other than mild depression and anxiety. This was after a lifetime labelled with multiple physical illnesses and mental health problems like schizoid personality and Bipolar disorder. I do think before the ego collapse, which was a gift, I likely fell into INFJ category. I have done my research and the best explanation I can give is that I was codependent to a codependent, scapegoated, and isolated beyond my will. Now, finally learning more about this, and Jung. Thank you so much for the detailed explanations. I am really healthy now. Get up and move is great advice. Also, love to INFJs.
I am an INFJ, I never have the same pattern with relationships. But I understand the possibility of being yummy preys for narcs.
Because we are empaths. They love us because we have the qualities they desire (but do not have) but they are also jealous of it so they also will eventually hate us for it.
This was so powerful and helpful to me. As an INFJ (99% sure) who has mostly fought against my typing, I appreciated the kindness you exude towards us. I felt "called out" but in a way that felt wonderful. I felt seen, good and bad, but in an understanding and accepting kind of way which helped me to feel more warmth and less criticism toward my flaws/quirks. Your advice was spot on and has given me a LOT to think and do about. I'm grateful I came across your channel. Thanks for sharing your wisdom!
This was EYE-OPENING! I completely understand the icy side of my personality. It's like I go rogue, taking all my perspectives into account, remembering any painful experiences with that person, then unleashing a barrage of multilayered logic in order to erect an inescapable conclusion around my target, and squeeze till it hurts. Then, upon reflecting, feel horrible for shattering thier soul. That said, sometimes it is warranted. And yet, I do not revel in such exchanges. However, I find myself more likely to use such on behalf of another, rather than for myself, as I feel more pain vicariously through others. Especially when I can tell that they aren't capable of standing up for themselves. I will go thermal nuclear on bully types harassing others. Just thinking about it as I write this has my adrenaline begining to surge. It doesn't feel logical but visceral. Anyways... Perhaps I ought to do some meditation. I enjoyed your video. You are great at breaking it down into parts, then building up into a clear conclusion. Very informative. Thank you for taking the time to expand my understanding of, well, me. Take care and God bless. ✝️
I love that an INTJ has tackled these topics. You folks have amazing brains at organizing and structuring. This is a clean and well put together channel. Thanks for doing this.
I love this video on INFJs. It's a concise and succinct honest overview of their personality, which I have studied thoroughly due to being mistyped as one while also being 5w4.
Have you gone down the Enneagram rabbit hole yet? I would love to see how you arrange and articulate that whole topic and then see how it pairs with cognitive functions.
Also, purely selfish request here 😅 could you go in more in depth with the male INFP?
Keep up the good work. This is becoming a top channel of mine. I just followed you on IG as well and may entertain the idea of a personal one on one.
Thank you!
Thank you so much for the kind feedback!! Yes I've definitely dabbled a bit in the enneagram! My video th-cam.com/video/jIVqCzMUWRM/w-d-xo.html compares enneagram to cognitive functions a little bit & also my enneagram 5 video th-cam.com/video/jCXBIrLH_QE/w-d-xo.html but I haven't done a holistic one for INFP for example :) That's a great idea about the male INFP video!! Thanks so much again!!! 🥳
"codependent best friend you've had for 8 years"
...the accuracy 😬
I found you when looking for an explanation of my wife's type (ESFJ), and your explanation is so crystal clear, I just HAD to hear about me too. Thank you for sharing!
The first test I took was in a general career prep course in college, and I got INFJ. I took a test a few years afterwards out of curiosity and got INFP. I do notice that I have traits of the INFJ but because of it's rarity and the likelihood of the mistyping I tend to believe I'm an INFP.. but I end up seeking info on both just in case. I notice that I'm maybe more concerned with other people's emotions and perspective than most INFP's so maybe INFJ is accurate. Who knows
I am an INFJ and I am literally working on a spreadsheet for uni while watching this, lol. I love my spreadsheets.
uhm, idk i have had a habit of focusing too much on other people’s feelings and making sure they’re comfortable. like, giving somebody older my seat when i can automatically catch cues of them trying to find a seat w/o them mentioning it. i tend to lean towards making others feel very comfortable and lean away from my own comfort to be a “savior” to them. but i’ve recently been trying to also take care of my own inner world recently. 🤷♀️
i also tend to be really confused of my inner world and defining myself even though i’m too much in my head and write poetry to articulate my inner world more. it’s contradicting, so i’m confused and keep doubting myself with infp vs infj. even isfj sometimes smh. but what helps me differentiate me between isfj and infj is how i initiate the deep, intellectual conversations between me and my friend ALWAYS. still haven’t found THE difference beyween infj and infp.
When I discovered that I was an INFJ, I finally felt a sense of belonging. And when I researched more on this topic everything fell into place. Our superpower NI. Ability to sense and see the future. High sensitivity. Introversion. Relating to other personality types such as INTJ, INFP, ENFJ, Etc.
❤️INTJs❤️
Just going by the title, I JUST started advocating for myself and BOY has it been terrifying, made me feel like an imposter, but so freeing and uplifting at the same time
I've often forgotten to eat, then suddenly I feel lightheaded and try to analyze why I'm feeling that way.😂
I work in healthcare, picking up on all of the feelings from staff and patients, gets to be taxing, so I really value my days off. I usually isolate to recharge, a nice bike ride on mountain trails is an excellent way to do that!
I loved the way you compared ISFJ and INFJ ! It was so accurate in a practical way.
I just want to say thank you. Your videos are amazing, keep it up, we need more quality content like this in this community.
I love how you explained everything. I struggle to find someone who would actually give advice on how to strengthen our weak points and get out of loops as clearly as you do. You have no idea how helpful this video is, thank you sooo much.
I have been reflecting a lot about how I can improve myself and I do have a problem with taking care of my body and my needs, I tend to neglect anything that is not intellectual or contributing to the future, so you're completely right I need to step back a bit from my introversion and focus on the daily habits, focus on my body health and participate in more social activities. ❤️❤️ Also, you made me realize how my Ti has been torturing me all these years with all the self-criticism.
Thank youuu
So I’m an INFP, but when you explain the care of peoples needs and harmony that’s me, but the way I use to handle conflict is how you explained after weeks shit gets icy. Oh boy. Does it! Haven’t been in a situation where I can tell if I have grown, but interesting. I’m still learning, so it can be relative .
wait, did you just say 1 out of 99 😅 the more people i meet, the more i see how hurtful people are. my relationship with "world" is probably unhealthy from meeting people. and when i meet people i try to give them the benefit of the doubt while they unload "things ive never told other people" on me. exhausting meeting people.
Omg I definitely don’t drink enough water apparently. I also always feel tired and not enough energy.
I’m not a hypochondriac but do have social anxiety.
I am an idealist and realize that could actually sometimes be a bad thing. Same with not wanting to hurt anyone’s feelings.
The kidney pain, this is so real 🤣 My mom is a sensor (ESFJ) and was very much disturbed by my detachment from my body and the physical world in general. The kidney comment made me feel seen.
I discovered your channel 2 days ago, Alexis. I have actually been waiting for this video and have contemplated messaging you about it, but I noticed it was going to happen soon enough (Ni lol).
The structure of the video and the general insights are very useful for me. Thank you for distilling the information so clearly and for the personal examples/stories!
As an INFJ 5w4, I started realizing this year that balancing out is better (for me) than solely focusing on few functions (e.g. skipping Fe or Se). I say this after thinking for a long time that focusing on Ni-Ti with some Fe-Se sprinkled randomly would work well enough. However, I noticed I am a better mathematician when my Fe-Se needs are met, and not only my Ni-Ti ones. While balancing in general can be challenging due to the varying nature of life itself, I highly encourage (as you said) that everyone tries it for themselves.
I have to agree with you extremely critical with myself I never hardly ever allow myself to get overly excited or even excited really because I know as soon as I do something bad's going to happen it happens every time so I keep myself in check my co-workers looking me all the time they're like why you do that yourself why do you say that I don't know folks I can't explain it myself all I know is it just happens and I keep myself in line I'm kind of catching onto the second letter third letter combining fighting each other back and forth and it is crazy it is hard I never really thought about it so if the way you're explaining it now bless your heart thank you so much I don't know if you know what it is to have a joy like Theirs to have such a burden off your chest that you just never could figure out or explain yourself or anybody else❤
I hear you, fellow INFJ here. My coworkers and boss are always telling me to stop being so hard and demanding on myself. I feel like I cannot help it either 😶🌫
This made things clear up for me, and gave me so many aspects of myself I should work on but are too afraid to admit. I'm so happy I found this video, you made it so easy to understand and digest, everything made sense, you're amazing, thank you so much.
I'm a fan. No fluff. Sharp and concise.
I guess I'm still feeling out the trends for MBTI. But I'm down for the ride here.
I trust what you're saying.
I got the same, well said.
My two favorites are INFJ and INTJ. I am an ENTP. I always feel misunderstood by most people. But when it comes to these two, INFJ trusts me from the get go! INTJ, on the other hand, takes some time and then they trust me.
hey, im an enfj hi! i just wanted to say that you seem like the kindest and most open minded intj i've met so far, and I haven't met a lot of intj's. the other intj's i met are very.. questionable.
I love that you explain the fondation of cognitive fonction in each personality video. You really are a good teacher and I understand everytime each personality better ! Muchas gracias !
Thank you!!
I can try to feel and relate to what you just tried to mention above. Myself being a male INFJ, It's like, we being empaths, deep thinkers and feelers observe and absorb energy from around. We are on toes to give our best shot no matter in what sort of pathetic situation we are dealing with in our personal lives. Our thoughts get processed in brains more faster than we can speak/express whenever interacting and expressing our emotions to someone and coz of this we end up as we are unable to explain exactly what are we want to express. Our complex nature makes people believe we are awkward and have intimidating personality coz we love to be alone oftenly to rejuvenate ourselves as get togethers, crowded places, small talks and irrelevant interactions drain our energies to a great extent. It takes a great courage to be a lone wolf in this era and stand by yourself no matter how much grief we carry in ourselves and face the world. We keep our ethics, morals on top of the list when it comes to chosing between right and wrong and taking a stand for others. There's a lot more more to this as it's a blend of never ending feelings and emotions. Stay Blessed!!!!
INFJ- INTJ but emotionless when it comes to internal processing of feelings, INTJ but a bit more self-aware, INTJ but striving for utopia instead of just technologically very advanced society, INTJ but more forgiving, INTJ but a bit less assertive, INTJ but a bit more socially extraverted, INTJ but having issues with life's purpose more often...
- ex INTP and INTJ mystype of an INFJ(Ni-Ti)
I have enjoyed personality hacker videos for ages but didn't fully understand the functions and stacks. You explain them so well! Do ISFJ next please
Perfect timing! The ISFJ video comes out Thursday!
Wow, this was the best description of infj personality that I ever heard
Yea you got us pegged. I can't stand flashy close, love nice feeling quality close.
About the Extraverted sensing if you a male INFJ you find its necessary to go to large groups to try and meet girls, not easy, but needed. The extraverted sensing is needed, but taxing, have to find ways to ways to balance it all out. Running is one of the post powerful things I have done to balance things outs when you get emotionally loaded.
Be careful of going towards the occult, INFJs are very sensitive to things in the spiritual realms.
Okay I will stop before I start to ramble, thank you for your videos, you make awesome content. Your are wonderful INTJ, you give so much back to people!
I understand what you mean about finding other people you can talk to about the things you like to talk about, having Ni as a preference. I have one INFJ friend, I'm an ENFJ, and she is exceptionally easy for me to keep a conversation going with.
The cognitive function stack is so much better to understand your MBTI
Huh, this explains why I initially tested like an INTJ when younger, like I was trying to be a T, somewhat defensively with people being awful.
Thank you so much for this video, I never realized why I would sit there and sense all the emotions in a room. Always thought I was freak, I sense the rooms emotions like one would smell a fragrance. The older I get the more I work my inter logic and group sensing.
She looks completely gorgeous to me. I totally love these introverted women. I am INFJ not INTJ though.
Thank you Alexis for this intelligent & professional video! And being on a similar wavelength! From, unique left-handed 6ft INFJ Australian female :)
I wish I understood the cognitive functions long ago. I do take criticism very personally, even if it's not. Learning more about being an INFJ really makes sense of my current relationships... and, yeah, I do door slam and am learning more about my relationship with a narcissist.
Found out I was an INFJ a while back. With taking the test and going through the results. It’s great being able to feel understood.
When you’re talking about the spiritual side of things. I like to think of myself as a spiritual explorer. Lol I try to stay on the light side of things but it’s funny as I have friends that are into the darker side of spirituality. They have told me that they enjoy talking because even though I can challenge them I don’t make them feel rejected.
Anyways great video
Thank you! You are right some INFJ's depending on their upbringing can balance all 4. But I am very direct and do not sugarcoat anything, especially a break-up lol. Empathy is something I was born with thus being a Empath which I did not know anything about until 3yrs ago.
no but listen. once I started taking care of my health and exercising, in addition to work and passion projects, now I don’t have ANY energy left for people (apart from a couple close ones) 😆 just the thought of going out to meet someone just to meet them… drains me to no end. it’s either one or the other, never both lol
13:45 I loved this part
I’m sorry to everyone that knew me during this time
Im so fucking thankful I found this, my partner is an INFJ and Im an ENFJ - this honestly makes me understand her more further. As she avoids voicing out.
This is so clear and accurate it’s terrifying
Believe it or not I have met many women who can’t decide whether they are I STP or I NFJ. Like, 3. It is never mentioned as a mistype.
So insightful, really appreciate it.
One time this woman on a dating website about did yours go ask me about my interests, and I told her that I was currently intrigued and studying light spectrum , she act like I was from a different planet hahaha more like a different dimension. Then I was in the Star Trek for a long time now anthropology is my jam, always had been. We are wired differently like. Beautiful defiance:; salmon swimming upstream..
Thank you! I'm an INFJ But I love to work out and keep a routine as best as possible, I don't mind cleaning but my room is always messy! lol! I do meditate, and I hope that grounds my energy to be in the present moment, INFJ can seem extroverted when their with a group of people their comfortable with and show their true leadership skills giving everyone an equal job and directing them to that when were feeling inclined and ambitious. Also if were feeling really comfortable with SE and FE combo we will really be frank speaking our mind and it might be totally opposite of how people perceive us, we have very heavy deep thoughts and intense opinions and almost be aggressive? Especially if we don't agree with something or someone, we love sticking up for the under dog! We can at times give off such a sweet innocent vibe that people are like woah when the other side is shown! lol! See the thing about INTJ is everyone expect them to be cold but they can be more in touch with their feelings then INFJ because we absorbs others emotions and place it upon ourselves like a chameleon adapting to the room as quick as possible or not depends. Were INTJ ain't faking that shit and they express that emotion directly, whether they like something or not. Like a Vulcan their emotions run really deep! Not that INFJ don't feel emotions they do, sometimes I feel we can lose what is truly ours and verse what's someone else's. With an INTJ you get what you see! it's like an INTJ The layers is deep emotion that's not perceived by many and INFJ the oppsite, the bubbly sunshine shit, and then we fucking flip and it's jarring to people! lol!
I've learned so much about myself and infjs n I'm definitely an infj-t
Thank you 🙏
Wow I've been listening to a lot of MBTI content in the past few years and this video is really gold. Everything is well explained and it's not boring.
I'm definitely subscribing to your channel, glad I've found it !!
Thank you so much!!!
INFJ male, Ive spent a lot of time alone in my life. Cars are big in my life and intensity for me, much of my time spent doing autobody. I paint in a shop for a living as Ive gotten older and life not handing me the best Ive gotten less active in my regular free time with age. Ive learned this about me recently being infj. Im still a work in progress and trying to understand myself and yes Ive known a long time I struggle with balance. Thanks for your explanations here, I'll likely watch this a few times....
I was like "nay, it is not true I nowadays take more care of my body" - *it is 5 PM and I am only eating my first meal*😅😂
LOL that is me everyday, and I also wanna tell myself I am taking better care of my body all the time 🤣
@@angiem2375 at least after the holiday stop, I am now getting back on track. The rollercoaster must be stopped!😇
@@triplemmm333 rollercoaster must be stopped indeed. We got this, we're back on track and staying on track this time ✨
That's so true. Boom. It's probably good the other selfish person will never let up.
Can’t say I’ve ever dressed gothic or bothered with red lipstick. I’m blond and stick with preppy clothing in public or hoodies at home. I do enjoy good, cute fashion.
Definitely need to be more active and get out more though lol
This is excellent. Thank you for your frankness regarding some of the more nuanced behaviors of the INFJ. On target right down to the black hair and black clothing. 😅
It's funny, as a 4w3 INFJ I am oriented towards external feelings and their harmony, and through that I try to understand my own harmony, in me there is no harmony, if there is no harmony on the outside
Truly, an INFJ should be the only one to explain an INFJ. Know what I mean? This is not to take away from your antics but rather to challenge you. So many use INFJ in the title for views. It’s just frustrating to see someone who’s claim their opinions are factual when explaining a complete stranger.
Such an accurate video! Well done! I love knowing I'm an INFJ. I just love not being "part of the herd", and just being me.
I appreciate how knowledgeable you are about the MBTI.... I have to chuckle because I'm having an astrological reaction to listening to you - I feel like you must have a lot of AIR in your astrological make-up, because your speed of talking makes this EARTH girl dizzy. I can't keep up.
I loved this.
The last section on style and breakups doesn't sound like INFJ to me. I much prefer outfits that suit my colouring and aren't any kind of trend such as goth or vintage, nothing that makes me stand out. Simple and quietly elegant is my style. Also the breakups aren't as nice as you describe. All my weirdness is on the inside. Hope that's helpful 😊xx
My two cents! Infj- A that’s me. Sigma male:door slamming/ over thinking and then some/ going into a rage sometimes for unnecessary stuff you are a infj-A congratulations 🎉 and also good luck 🍀. Your power and cursed. ✌🏻
Very well made video about INFJs, very informative.
I love spreadsheets 🤣
New favorite channel for explaining things in a concrete way. Thank you for pointing out ways we can work on things tangibly. Infp male dating Infj female.
1:30 I was mistyped as an infp, and I took knowing certain values as Fi. Turnes out I do not ever know how I actually feel until it beats me over the head because I’m so focused on everyone else having a grand old time. I really have to sit and think about what it is that I’m feeling and why. Other infps I know seem to be able to tell you exactly what they are feeling and why nearly on the spot.
Awesome video professor Kingsley! I really enjoy the formatting for these types of videos
I’m a male infj. Somebody admire my rareness please! Although I wish it was the infp girl I love that would admire me deep down😅😅🙂🙃🙁
This is a really great overview and points made. Thank you!
Amazing video, thanks for the advice! INFJ here 🤗
Not so much sensitive to criticism as we have already thought past the point being brought up
Me: (Hermit mode: On)
This video: Calling me tf out...
I cried when I found out I was infj
I often thought about turning that light switch that you are mentioning and being icy but even then I stop myself because I know it is mean. I don't like hurting people on purpose.
Lol how did you know about my signature vamp looks👀👀🤣🤣🤣❤️❤️
I realized a few years ago that my ibs and gastritis was due to not drinking enough water combined with chronic stress.
I subscribed to your site..I am jungian not freudian...I am wired to notice trends and patterns.....you are on the right track..keep digging
try not to idealize people - so true.
The only mistype I've ever gotten is, once or twice, coming up as an INTJ... other than that it's been INFJ the few dozen times I've taken the test (over the years).