Is anyone else here a survivor of pedophilia? Let me know in the comments. This has negatively affected my confidence and mental capacity to date and a permanent change has occurred because of it.
Yes because if a man doesn't fertilize the egg that drops every month, it dies and there would be no population without us Lifesavers hahaha well, not me because I always wrap it up 🤣🤣😅
@@CourtneyRyan forgot the turn off of being less than 6 feet, less than 7 inches, making less than 100k, don't gaslight your audience and be a pick me
1. Negative self talk 2. Lacking good hygiene or grooming habits all together 3. Revving your engine/driving unsafely 4. No chivalry on dates 5. Too agreeable/passive 6. Emotianal vomit 7. Talking about other women
This is what pilltards actually need to hear. Although in fairness 7. it really depends on the presentation. It may piss them off, but a woman who feels like she's the best you're going to get, who feels too secure, is especially if she's young going to be more likely to stray. Women hate this shit because it takes a lot of their power away in the relationship when they know you literally don't need them and can find another girl.
@@giorgosdro7059 There's a difference between being unattractive, and therefore not so likely being hit on by women, and being a crude, vulgar, self involved asshole who's undisciplined, rude, selfish, egotistic, insecure, and comes off as creepy. Yes it's absolutely 100% true women will overlook those things more if you're attractive to the point I've outright seen people attributing wildly different things to an unattractive person that somebody doing the same exact things when they're attractive gets called "confident" "aloof" "self assured" etc. when an ugly guy would be getting called a selfish creepy asshole. So there is that. But at the same time I've spoken with so many guys over the years where clearly the problem is their personality. Hint, if you're having troubles with people generally and not just women, it isn't just your looks, it's because your character and behavior is the problem and yes you need to fix that. There's this song I can't fucking stand "you're perfect just the way you are" no, no you are not. That one simple line sums up in perfection the overall attitudes of boomers, millenials, karens, entitled ass modern girls, and pretty much any other subgroup for those Americans of the entitled persuasion. You are not perfect, period. One must always strive to suck less than they previously did.
@@giorgosdro7059 In fairness to Courtney, this Video is about what not to do on a Date. If you are Ugly, you won't get one in the first place (unless you are Rich).
Important thing: 0:16 First Thing - Negative Self-talk; 1:53 Second Thing - Lacking Good Hygiene Or Grooming Habits; 4:15 Third Thing - Revving Your Engine / Driving Like An Idiot; 6:36 Fourth Thing - No Chivalry On Dates; 7:17 (so true - it matters who you are deeply in your heart, and in your head); 8:37 Fifth Thing - Too Agreeable / Not Direct; 10:39 Sixth Thing - Oversharing / Trauma Dumping; 12:21 Seventh Thing - Talking About Other Women; and 14:48 to summarize all the told. Some of these things can be a turn off for men as well. Also some of these things might be used in most of the life situations. Among the all told here I might add few other things that are turn off. And those are: 8. Lack of showing the attention; 9. Not showing empathy; and 10. Behaving as an immature person. No matter what they say I surely believe that there is a chivalry (and I believe that there are women who respect that). I'll always be a gentleman, no matter what happens. I respect women (but I can sometimes agree, and disagree with the things, etc.). When I was learning to drive a car, I was taught by a woman. And I don't have that problem at all. Thank you very much Courtney for this. Especially I thank you for telling that chivalry still exist. It means a lot. You are so awesome Courtney. The topic is la perfection madam 😉😘🙂🤓😎❤❤❤.
What's oversharing/trauma dumping though? Like, I just lost a close family member, and it would've been nice if I could speak to her about it, but she seems to be avoiding me like the plague during this trying time.
@@marsjokes It means when you are talking about the problems, that you don't treat her as a punching bag (let's call it that way). But generally speaking this could also be used in any life situations, and also when talking to other people as well. I understand that nobody is wishing to lose close family member. It's OK that you communicate with that if it happened (God forbid anyone). Oversharing / Trauma dumping would be more like not to talk too much about problems, and don't do dumping problems to them all the time, cause some people have problems of their own (and some of them don't need additional problems). Also some people may abuse your problems that you have (honor exceptions for those who don't do that). That's the meaning of this. I hope that I have explained it very well. You can correct me if I'm wrong.
@MikeyP109 what's the point of dating if you don't have someone you could lean on in tines of trouble? Sounds a lot more trauma driven to only want to be in the company of people with "good vibes" only.
@Harikejn unfortunately, it's too late to forbid something that has already happened. I'm using my current experience as an example. These people seem to only want to be in my company or attend to me when I'm feeling good, and not when I'm not.
I remember I was so focused on my goals, (becoming successful) passions... (I am still a man of focus), that I was absolutely not interested in any relationship. During 1 of my early joggings I started to talk to a young woman, then she asked me if we could exchange numbers. I responded with a smile, that I honestly had no time for a relationship and that there was no point. A couple of days later I met her again. She gave me her mobile number (on a business card) and asked me very politely, that I would pls give her a call, whenever I would have time. I still did not give her call. 1 week later I saw her again, she apologized for coming on too strong. I answered that it was fine and I would call her next weekend to hang out. So we did and I took it very slow. Eventualy we got together and she's still my girlfriend after 5 years and she's a keeper. Very fine woman with feminine traits. Our core values are the same and that's very important.😊
Having poor hygiene is huge for both men and women. Nobody wants to be with somebody that has terrible hygiene and doesn’t take care of themselves. It’s a red flag for me, it’s disgusting.
Hygiene is a very recent developement. Even on the court in Versaiiles nobody saw a reason for it. During my Hippi time it was the same. As more dirty as more atreactive. Finally it is more healthy not avoiding bacteria as the immun system works better and you get no allergies.
I think it just will help you to make you feel good with yourself but it don't necessarily mean there will be plenty of women falling in love with you. I see some ugly guys with pretty woman, I just can't understand, they don't take care of themselves that much.
There is only one type of place where a revving a car engine is appropriate: a racetrack! Drive safely, folks. Your passengers and other responsible drivers will appreciate it!
No trauma dumping. Yea, I bombed a relationship by doing that once. I eventually came to the conclusion that I could either pay a therapist to listen or take that stuff to the grave. Because, strangers dont want to be bummed out by your problems. And your guy friends also dont want to hear about it. It's just another reminder that no matter how many valued people you have in your life, we all die alone in the end. Embrace the suck and move along. And try some mushrooms to heal the PTSD if you can get some.
That's where it's helpful to have a female friend who you can really talk to. There's no interest on either side romantically, but women are more into male friendships generally than men. If you have some trauma to work through, a female friend is going to be the most receptive for you being able to open up about that and walk you through it.
@@anom6707 It's not at all true to not open up to women. Don't open up to the wrong woman. Also what this guy did by putting too much on a relationship and ended up trauma dumping, that can ruin a newer relationship. A well established one can handle it though.
"Too agreeable" yeah had that problem when i was younger. Used to think that if i diasagreed with a girl she would stop liking me. Also used to do this thing where if a girl mentioned she liked something id enthusiastically agree instead of sharing my own opinion. I think this a turn off for girls and seems desperate and they can tell what youre doing.
Charisma on Command talk about this. Charlie from there once disagreed with a girl who criticized the people in her town, he said he liked them (when it would have been easier to agree with her). He got with her. Having authenticity is good.
@@Imran-Lalaniyou might think that but subconsciously women are attracted to and respect a man who stands his ground and sticks to his beliefs and opinions
Women definitely prefer a man w/ his own opinions. It's nice to be challenged in conversation and to have some things to haggle over and get into deep and interesting discussions. Sense of humour about your differences really helps. Esp. if you needle each other and turn it into inside jokes, that can be bonding. Don't be obnoxious and a right fighter. That's the only thing that can turn either sex off pretty quick.
You know... I do not care anymore! I should not need to babysit a grown woman with what she wants and needs. I look after myself and she wants me to look after her as well? Seriously? Nah... I'll just find a mature stable woman - they exist in multitudes. If I find one where we both connect even better!
This topic of hygiene came on the right time. Today I have been talking with a married man, he was having a conversation with me, the distance between us was short enough. Guess what I started to smell a bad breath coming from his side in the form of waves, it could kill a mosquito moving nearby😂, it was really annoying, I could not keep the conversation going for so long. Whenever I remember this smell, it is still in my nose till now. I will try to take a cup of tea containing flowers to ease me up.
The agreeable point is something I definitely struggle with. People pleasing is something of a coping/defense mechanism with the NDDs I suffer from and keeping that under wraps is quite exhausting, lol.
What’s NDD? People pleasing is a compensatory mechanism for me too, but for me it’s mostly due to growing up with undiagnosed autism. Not knowing how to be liked will do that to you.
I once got scolded by a close female friend for employing a bit of self-deprecating humor ("Strong back, Weak mind"). Didn't really understand the perspective at the time.
Most women hate self-deprecating humor because they're not intelligent enough to understand it. You have to read the room, and realize the woman usually has the brain cells of an amoeba.
If there's good rapport going on, particularly with the chivalry and being a gentleman point, I've found that instead of holding hands, offering my arm for her to hold onto is a great way to build physical chemistry and have that old-world sense of charm, without feeling pushy or needy.
Thanks as always for making these videos Courtney! You are a rockstar! So many great points here. I had positive results yesterday that may have turned the heads of a few girls at the restaurant yesterday. I got the chance to hold the door for an older gentleman with a walker and later a lady with carry out. The whole time there, I was pleasant, polite and acknowledged anyone with whom I saw. I was dressed nice and am in good shape, but I think the girls liked how I carried myself. Somebody else pointed out to me that they were checking me out because I never noticed. I have terrible girl radar. Haha. It was a nice moment. Point is fellas that how you carry yourself makes a huge impact more than designer label or a fancy car. Happy Father’s Day to all the great Dads out there!
I do this shit because I was brought up that way, I have no earthly idea if holding the door for men and women is putting off signals or what modern people are like. In retrospect I shouldn't have been *that* shutin, but the pandemic completely enabled me so whatever. Do people really think you're hitting on them when you do this?
I’ve recently had several guys from dating apps bring up after talking to me for a week and showing interest that “oh their ex just broke up with them a year ago.. and they were depressed early that year” or “hey can I ask a random question? So you think exes can be friends?” And went on about how they are friends. Or I went on a date 2 weeks ago where the guy was nice and flirty in the beginning but then asked my dating experiences on rhe app and went on about his.. how he matched with a professor from Ivy League school who canceled on him right before the date? SMH 🤦♀️. I’m just sitting there listening to them and thinking what the hell is wrong with them.. they are in their 30s and talking about exes /other dates before the first date or on the date while I’m RIGHT there. It feels horrible. I don’t understand how they don’t even have any awareness that they are in talking stages with me or on a date with me and we’re supposed to see if WE have a connection but you’re talking about other girls you dated? I felt like you are not interested in me and like I’m not good enough. It felt very disrespectful and I can’t trust you as any type of partner. So yeah.. men don’t do this! It’s not cool nor respectful! I had to go off on one guy bc I got so fed of this after 3 guys did this recently the past few months..
I hate when people act like taking a step back, reanalyzing, not overly commiting when you haven't properly accessed a situation, not speaking out of your ass about things you don't know is perceived as a "lack of confidence" when those are all things that brought me success in life. It's like people purposefully want to find failure attractive, you have to bullshit to them about the steps you take to solve problems to seem like you don't have to "overly think" about a situation. Or maybe those people were never put in truly difficult situations to begin with.
I definitely agree with all of these. I was seeing a guy who kept bringing up the other women he was seeing. After asking him not to bring them up, he did it again & was shocked when I immediately ended things. If u have options, you don't need to tell others that you have options.
Except Courtney accidentally spilled the truth at 14:20 by admitting women want a guy that other women want: herd mentality. Sorry, but women don't get to have the "herd mentality" in the precious portion that's acceptable to them. if women are going to open that can of worms, they have to own it. You don't get to blame the guy. Nope.
Maybe you put him in a position where he felt the need to mention that he has other options in order to put you in your place. We don't see what lead up to it...only you know that.
I agree and understand all the points brought up in this video, but something really stood out to me revolving around two of the points. The first point about not talking down about yourself and the emotional vomit point, I think there is some significant correlation between these two things and why men’s mental health has been declining. All guys at some point in their life has insecurities and or trauma that goes completely unaddressed, and that burying is reinforced by the dynamic between men and women among others as well. Now I’m not blaming women, just pointing it out. I am someone who had a rough childhood and adolescents and certain things I experienced still have an effect on my to this day, and if not for me getting taken out of that situation and having some support, I would have no clue where I’d be today. Getting to the point though, there are very few people that I would even discuss my past with, and nobody that I would get into how I felt and still feel. I know from watching others how easily you can bring other people down or push people away by sharing these things, and I’d imagine I’m not the only one. Just as I said I’m not blaming women, I’m also not blaming society for this, it’s only natural to feel uncomfortable discussing and dealing with these issues, I’m just pointing out the reality for many people.
The male gaze was an old school term used in film theory classes to talk about over sexualization. Now it's a buzzword for tiktokers?? They love rebranding and recycling terminology and changing their connotations... which might not be a bad thing? I don't know where I'm going with this... Perfect video.
@I am me • 25y ago I think they're also butchering a lot of psychology terms and names of illnesses like ocd, trauma-bonding, depression, adhd, anxiety, etc. I think that's worse than the ones they come up with. Oh well...
Courtney, I loved this video, even though I have a few of the points to work on, but that is a good thing for my self-improvement. Men and women are attracted to very different things; I’d love to see a full video on this.
Happy Father’s Day to Captain Clayface aka Courtney’s dad!
Admiring a man's physique has more to do with men knowing how hard it is to achieve. The countless hours in the gym, eating right, taking supplements. Yes, we find discipline, dedication and hard work, cool! 💪🏾 Edit: It's not always done for the female gaze, taking care of your body is part of self-improvement.
This, it's why I can't f'ing stand this "thin privilege" bullshit. No, you have fat privilege, in other words the food privilege to have so much access to cheap food and needing to do so little physical work you can get like that. It's why it's so incredibly unattractive when women try and make it like having a physique and being fit is "privileged" hell no it takes a lot of hard work and hell of a lot of time to do it, and that requires taking massive amounts of daily sacrifices in not eating that snack, not getting the extra garlic bread, not eating so much fatty food and sweets. People who get really fit don't get there by being privileged: you get fit through a lot of hard work, personal sacrifices, and discipline; you get obese by being privileged. I still need to drop a good 10 pounds.
Her talking about about men taking gym selfies was weird too. It's mostly women who do this. I feel like there is a lot of projection in this video. She complains about men who assume that women will be impressed by things that men are (the car/revving example), and yet women are notorious for this. Older women lead with their career thinking men care. Then said women complain when they get passed over for a younger woman with less career attainment.
I think she’s saying to not be petty and revengeful. By taking the high road and keeping your chin up and being you. Your confident self. They pay attention.
A lot of the times guys flex their car skills to impress other guys, something I've always found weird. Like my mans just drive your car and chill out 😂 Looking gracious as always Courtney!
I've been on tinder for like almost a year now and have had ZERO matches since joining. Can you make a video concerning tips and what you might do wrong on Tinder that makes women not swipe right?
I would heed the advice about not talking about ex's except I frequently get asked about it when I'm on dates. Especially "Why did you get divorced?" So then I'm forced to come up with some explanation.
The car and the motorcycle being tuned to perfection and sounding like the love I put into the hobby are for me. If women don’t like then then that’s totally fine, I can live with it
Women do really appreciate a mechanical guy and a passion for a hobby. They probably won't share your passion, like another mechanical man would, but she's still going to admire that you are good at that. Just about any woman I know likes a mechanical man, and really appreciates a man that can fix things. I think it's kind of like how men have no passion for keeping house and aren't going to put much into decor or cleaning. They still really like it when a woman comes along, scours it all down and adds her woman's touch.
I think the advent of feminism has had a very negative impact on society, as many women think they can have everything in every way without taking any responsibility for their actions and men are now just confused about what is expected. All the traditional masculine traits now seem to have come under the category of 'toxic' masculinity.
In regards to the bad driving manners, I have seen many instances where a bad driving decision either led to or nearly led to an accident. Too many times a driver will change lanes without turning their signal on, or try to turn off a road from a lane on the other side of the road (turning left from the far right lane, as an example). Trying to show off how fast your vehicle can go or how swift you can make a turn can and will go terribly wrong and may cost more than just simple car repairs.
My now husband had a sickness where he sweats alot. He had a normal figure not very muscula nor overweight, but he was always sweaty and smelled a bit becasue of it. We had a few dates and before the fourht date, i had made up my mind about ending it, becasue i was kinda grossed out. in the middle of our date he told me about his sickness and a few months later he got better medication and now sweats like a normal person. Kinda sad how shallow we all are...
There are a lot of women who dress or act in a way that it encourages me to be chivalrous, but I refrain from doing it. I will take your word for a week, and give it 5 strikes.
In regards to the first topic, the other way round. I remember giving up on a gorgeous girl who was "never up to the circumstance". She was wonderful, incredibly beautiful but she was always self-deprecating. I didn't "dump" her. I would never do, but I gave up. She is still the same, and single.
Self deprecation is not always a sign of no confidence can be just the opposite (not obsessively) that’s just weird. Kind and mannerly but not a lapdog (boundaries).
I appreciate this video. It made me think introspectively about I’d I do these things. Anytime you look inside, especially with somebody else “guiding” the questions, is a gift. Have a good day CCR
4:15 Literally reminded me of this TikTok where a guy revs his engine and a cop shouts over the P.A. system, “Shut up, idiot!” Funniest thing I’ve ever seen! 😂😂😂
These ought to be interesting; fortunately I learned things like these in my early twenties and being in my early thirties I'm definitely having a lot more fun, and a lot better of experiences
The car thing actually depends on the girl, my sister in-law loves driving fast, and such. She actually pushes the boundaries of safety more than my brother does.
It can depend. I used to have the lead foot on highways when I first met my ex. He was quite the grandma when he drove. He didn't say too much about it when we first started dating, as it was my car and he never had his own. After we'd been going out for years, he turned into the worst backseat driver. It actually harassed me into letting him drive most of the time, which was his goal. If we were on a trip to pick up relatives or something though, they would get frustrated w/ how slow and even ginger he was about even changing lanes to not get stuck in slow traffic. They'd be super relieved if I took over driving.
Driving is a weird one. I've been with women who both loved and hated speeding. Most of them actually enjoyed it, coming to think of it. But there is being obnoxious, endangering yourself and others type of driving when you are just being an annoyance and there is fun driving where you occasionally launch it on a clear road just to experience that exhilarating acceleration.
I'm enjoying this new arc of Courtney videos. The butter churning arc. 😁 I'm hoping I'm not doing any of these things listed here. 😬We'll see. If I am I'm ready to make some adjustments. *presses play*
Dont wear sunglasses inside, even if you're by yourself in the grocery store. Also, 90% of people don't care about your problems, the other 10% are glad you have them.
I can say with confidence that all of these go both ways accept for driving fast. It's kind of hot if a woman knows how to drive fast or enjoys a brisk drive once in a while. Never in a place where you might put others at risk.
The reason i go along with thing and im agreeable is because i dont care enough most of the time. Where we eat what we do where we go. These are things i dont care about so it does not matter to me what the choice is.
Definitely agree with most of your points, especially the manner in which we drive. Fellas, I’ve done this and Courtney is correct- females want to feel safe. Don’t mess up your date for the sake of showing off.
I've fallen into #1 and #4 many times in the past, so that's totally valid. Re #3, female gaze is totally a Thing, let us not deny that. Those of us not blessed with things like looks, height, and muscles *will* be ignored. Speaking from experience, there, of course. I tend to be direct because I believe in not BSing anybody; it's not my fault that people are easily offended by everything these days. As per the last two things, well...I went through a pretty bad divorce 16 years ago and when I finally got over myself and began the process of reforging myself? I finally reached a point where I could be and can be completely objective about my part in it now and can safely say I learned more than I thought I had before. With all that having been said? I'm a happy bachelor and intend on keeping it that way for a couple of reasons.
I've inadvertently done the speeding thing in my work truck. I drive for FedEx, and through a combination of being in a rush and not feeling well, went a bit too fast in a parking lot. A girl in a Tesla chewed me out for going too fast and not being careful
How did you respond? The general public has no idea the amount of pressure and packages you have to deliver on a daily basis! And that's not including the peak holiday season.
@TheWedabest I just told her that I was already late and didn't have the time to discuss it. She, in turn, told me to slow down because there were elderly people around
Noticed your catalog You haven't had a self improvement video for a while. That is the most attractive thing to me about your channel, with dating second
5:01 it's like how bodybuilders end up getting more attention from guys than women just like these dudes burning their oil and gas get more attention from boys than they do adult women. Only gold diggers care about your car Bro, Other Women care about your shoulders your heart your brain and your jokes
5:37 that's hilarious I literally was just talking about that hahaha fellows if you can get the swimmer's body the warrior's body where the athlete's buddy you will be just fine. Looks do open doors but personality and mental fortitude keep you inside those doors
I hate that confidence is seen as a virtue. The only people who are confident are rarely intelligent and they are rarely right. Ever heard someone described as 'seldom doubtful but often wrong'? Intelligent people know how easy it is to be wrong and appreciate the consequences of their mistakes. Also, it's virtually impossible to differentiate confidence from not giving a shit. It's easy to appear confident when the consequences are negligible. People ACT confident to dupe people: they are shysters.
It's a fine line between confidence and cockiness or delusion. What you're describing is verging on the later. Confident people are aware of their mistakes, but they handle them with more grace. I've met plenty of confident people, and I've noticed two things - confidence is silent, never boastful, and it takes a lot of emotional intelligence.
Confidence is a virtue. It shows that you've pushed yourself beyond your comfortable boundaries and have achieved some level of insight and competence. I know where my limits are. I know how I respond to failures and success. I know how hard I will work to achieve goals. I'm confident as heck because I've tasted the vinegar of failure and have persevered when all my doubts and fears urged me to stop.
I had a house mate who during the interview stage was fine, but once he moved in, he never showered. We counted 3 months before he even did. He smelt so bad I could smell his footprints on the kitchen floor...it was amazing and disgusting at the same time lol
Hey Courtney! I’m a regular viewer of the videos. I want to know if you have any pointers for me. I’m almost done with college. I’m currently spending my summer in Europe, mostly in the Netherlands. I’ve worked really hard on my emotional and mental health. I don’t wear my heart on my sleeve as much as I used to. I’ve managed to maintain a small circle of friends, especially with a female friend, even though I’m often socially awkward. Is there anything more I can do? I love all the videos you do. You have a very attractive character, and one I would like in a future partner.
I think most car people can agree we do not care about how others view our car, if you find it annoying but it makes someone else happy, for example those 2 teenage boys interacting with the driver, that will make our day. Plus most car people date other car people, if a woman is disinterested in cars, from what ive seen guys dont go for them at all.
Turn ons for women: - being a psychopath -being a narcissist - being a serial killer - treating her like garbage -cheating on her Nice guys finish last, bad boys finish on her face.
The revving the engine thing is also annoying to me too as a man because at my dorm there’s this guy who owns a car with a really loud muffler who drives around every night and when he’s on the road he revs his engine so loudly that I thought I’d lose my hearing one time! So yeah, revving your engine is unattractive to women and it says something about your personality towards anyone too.
Totally agree with you on the engine revving. There's 3 categories for it though. 1 is teens or import kids who drive a turd of a Honda or other import being obnoxious on a Tuesday night. 2 it's f boys in their diesels or new sports cars like a corvette or audi and 3 is a classic that's a turd in progress like a squarebody chevy or classic car. Restored classics people will look at differently for being loud at idle or taking off at a light but the attention is natural so no need to drive stupid
@@xjoemallardx It's hard work, but you need to counter all the negative chatter. You have a lot of good attributes too. I'm sure you have bad, like we all do, but you're likely amplifying and magnifying the bad, or even conflating them. What you think is all bad, some women will think is neutral and might even see as pretty ok. Like if you have certain insecurities and she has similar, you can put each other at ease. Focus on your good. As hard as you've been hyerpfocusing on the bad, or what you percieve as bad,hyperfocus away from it to your best attributes, and make sure to include all the neutral and average ones too. Most of us are average, so that's all good.
My regular partner actually likes me to drive fast. So let's not generalize things because some women are anxious and don't trust the person driving. Women are not all like that. Find the woman that fits with your personnality instead of changing for her. Changing for someone does not work. It leads to frustration and enventually resentment. Find the right girl, she's out there guys! 😎👍
@@MikeyP109 It's absolutely click bait. She's also very redundant. She has a lack of content so she just recycles the same things in different lists so she can put out more videos. More videos, more advertisements. She's just cashing in on simps with disingenuous, broad brush statements that only really apply to her.
@@Swearengen1980 It's sad, but what many men don't realize is that there are women out there who are going to leave you no matter how good looking, smart, or rich you are. They are wired up bad and get off on chasing after a guy but then start the discard process at some point. They often repeat this behavior. It's devastating. It's mind-blowing to see that there are women that are still relatively happy with POS husband when there are elite men out there with fucking six packs, are wealthy, have status, and devoted but are getting dumped simply because a woman like to jump from cock to cock.
Gotta love the hypocrisy of #1: Never doubt, critisize or talk bad about yourself - EVER. But if she does it every other day, you are expected to support her - no matter how stupid the reason is. Double standards much? Screw what girls say: NEVER show any weakness. If you have problems, talk with your family or your best friends. If UR girl asks, just say: "Don't worry about it. It will be fine."
Just stay away from the extremes... there's a middle ground and that's where you want to be. A little bit of vulnerability is attractive, a lot is gross.
@@daniellehotsky1776 A bit bitter at the moment yeah I'll admit that. The thing is, I never heard "don't show weakness" but I saw that it was never really accepted or seen like something positive. More like "I have to take care now euuh". Maybe it was on the girls but maybe it's something deeper. I found that talking about the real hurts with friends to work out waaay smoother in the long run as with partners. But yeah - I agree with you that those are HUGE red flags and real downers if it's all the time and non-stop doubting. Tiresome, man.
As a guy and fan of fast American Muscle cars (Proud Mustang owner), even I can't stand revving your engines and I find it very annoying and you're not doing your engine any favor in a long run.
All solid points to be fair. With 7 I agree it doesn't really come across as confident when you have to blurr it out which kind of goes into number 6. But the girl really does want to know that out of all the other girls, you chose her and only her. She just doesn't wana hear about all the girls who crashed and burned before her. This is a good example of "if she doesn't ask, then don't tell."
I went out on a couple of first dates this past week. On the first, I paid for dinner, which i think was a bit of a pleasant surprise for the woman (she's a well-paid professional and I'm a modestly comfortable retiree, so she makes _way_ more than I do). On the second date, I gave her a box of chocolate*. it was a pretty warm day, so as we were leaving in our own cars, I had her leave her passenger door open to give the air conditioning time to cool off the interior. Not exactly chivalry, but definitely smart, take-charge thinking. *I made a point of asking her in advance, by text, if she liked chocolate. I replied "Note taken," which she liked. When I showed up for the date, I had her chocolate - quality chocolate - in a nice paper bag. But also inside the bag was an ordinary Hershey bar, which is what I pulled out first. I quickly took it back and gave her the real thing, and she seemed to think it was funny. I also let her keep the Hershey bar; you think I was gonna' be a jerk? 😁
Being your authentic self or completely changing as a man to attract a woman doesn’t actually matter; if she ever finds you attractive, it’s always temporary anyway… be un-emotionally emotionally available, always be assertive and confident… unless it’s something she says otherwise, Don’t be dangerous, but also Don’t be boring, but also be exciting and spontaneous, while also being dependable and consistent. ….. Just be physically attractive, loaded, and popular; while being willing to admit you’re always wrong🤷🏻👍
The third point which you mentioned just doesn't apply to me since I use public transport .... Lol ... 😀. Anyways, nice informative video, Courtney Ryan ... 👍.
I honestly get annoyed when friends of mine, both men and women forget deodorant, or even not shower like they should. Terrible hygiene can mess up both relationships and even friendships.
Get 30% off your first box, plus a FREE gift, when you give Tiege Hanley a try at tiege.com/crturnoff
just what i needed
Courtney you should do a video about us 5’8 and below men. Would they date us?
@@roolyfe Yes, they will.
@@MikeyP109 👌🏿
Is anyone else here a survivor of pedophilia? Let me know in the comments. This has negatively affected my confidence and mental capacity to date and a permanent change has occurred because of it.
Happy Fathers Day Fathers
Happy Father’s Day! 🤍🤍🤍
Yes because if a man doesn't fertilize the egg that drops every month, it dies and there would be no population without us Lifesavers hahaha well, not me because I always wrap it up 🤣🤣😅
@@LatimusChadimus🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
@@LatimusChadimuswhat?
@@CourtneyRyan forgot the turn off of being less than 6 feet, less than 7 inches, making less than 100k, don't gaslight your audience and be a pick me
1. Negative self talk
2. Lacking good hygiene or grooming habits all together
3. Revving your engine/driving unsafely
4. No chivalry on dates
5. Too agreeable/passive
6. Emotianal vomit
7. Talking about other women
This is what pilltards actually need to hear. Although in fairness 7. it really depends on the presentation. It may piss them off, but a woman who feels like she's the best you're going to get, who feels too secure, is especially if she's young going to be more likely to stray. Women hate this shit because it takes a lot of their power away in the relationship when they know you literally don't need them and can find another girl.
1. being ugly
@@giorgosdro7059 There's a difference between being unattractive, and therefore not so likely being hit on by women, and being a crude, vulgar, self involved asshole who's undisciplined, rude, selfish, egotistic, insecure, and comes off as creepy. Yes it's absolutely 100% true women will overlook those things more if you're attractive to the point I've outright seen people attributing wildly different things to an unattractive person that somebody doing the same exact things when they're attractive gets called "confident" "aloof" "self assured" etc. when an ugly guy would be getting called a selfish creepy asshole. So there is that. But at the same time I've spoken with so many guys over the years where clearly the problem is their personality. Hint, if you're having troubles with people generally and not just women, it isn't just your looks, it's because your character and behavior is the problem and yes you need to fix that.
There's this song I can't fucking stand "you're perfect just the way you are" no, no you are not. That one simple line sums up in perfection the overall attitudes of boomers, millenials, karens, entitled ass modern girls, and pretty much any other subgroup for those Americans of the entitled persuasion. You are not perfect, period. One must always strive to suck less than they previously did.
Talk about other women, they all do 🙄
@@giorgosdro7059 In fairness to Courtney, this Video is about what not to do on a Date. If you are Ugly, you won't get one in the first place (unless you are Rich).
Important thing: 0:16 First Thing - Negative Self-talk; 1:53 Second Thing - Lacking Good Hygiene Or Grooming Habits; 4:15 Third Thing - Revving Your Engine / Driving Like An Idiot; 6:36 Fourth Thing - No Chivalry On Dates; 7:17 (so true - it matters who you are deeply in your heart, and in your head); 8:37 Fifth Thing - Too Agreeable / Not Direct; 10:39 Sixth Thing - Oversharing / Trauma Dumping; 12:21 Seventh Thing - Talking About Other Women; and 14:48 to summarize all the told.
Some of these things can be a turn off for men as well. Also some of these things might be used in most of the life situations.
Among the all told here I might add few other things that are turn off. And those are:
8. Lack of showing the attention;
9. Not showing empathy; and
10. Behaving as an immature person.
No matter what they say I surely believe that there is a chivalry (and I believe that there are women who respect that). I'll always be a gentleman, no matter what happens.
I respect women (but I can sometimes agree, and disagree with the things, etc.). When I was learning to drive a car, I was taught by a woman. And I don't have that problem at all.
Thank you very much Courtney for this. Especially I thank you for telling that chivalry still exist. It means a lot.
You are so awesome Courtney.
The topic is la perfection madam 😉😘🙂🤓😎❤❤❤.
What's oversharing/trauma dumping though?
Like, I just lost a close family member, and it would've been nice if I could speak to her about it, but she seems to be avoiding me like the plague during this trying time.
@@marsjokes It means when you are talking about the problems, that you don't treat her as a punching bag (let's call it that way). But generally speaking this could also be used in any life situations, and also when talking to other people as well.
I understand that nobody is wishing to lose close family member. It's OK that you communicate with that if it happened (God forbid anyone).
Oversharing / Trauma dumping would be more like not to talk too much about problems, and don't do dumping problems to them all the time, cause some people have problems of their own (and some of them don't need additional problems). Also some people may abuse your problems that you have (honor exceptions for those who don't do that). That's the meaning of this.
I hope that I have explained it very well.
You can correct me if I'm wrong.
@@marsjokes Maybe put a pause on dating. It's not fun to date someone who just went through a traumatic experience and feels the need to share it.
@MikeyP109 what's the point of dating if you don't have someone you could lean on in tines of trouble?
Sounds a lot more trauma driven to only want to be in the company of people with "good vibes" only.
@Harikejn unfortunately, it's too late to forbid something that has already happened.
I'm using my current experience as an example.
These people seem to only want to be in my company or attend to me when I'm feeling good, and not when I'm not.
I remember I was so focused on my goals, (becoming successful) passions... (I am still a man of focus), that I was absolutely not interested in any relationship. During 1 of my early joggings I started to talk to a young woman, then she asked me if we could exchange numbers. I responded with a smile, that I honestly had no time for a relationship and that there was no point. A couple of days later I met her again. She gave me her mobile number (on a business card) and asked me very politely, that I would pls give her a call, whenever I would have time. I still did not give her call. 1 week later I saw her again, she apologized for coming on too strong. I answered that it was fine and I would call her next weekend to hang out. So we did and I took it very slow. Eventualy we got together and she's still my girlfriend after 5 years and she's a keeper. Very fine woman with feminine traits. Our core values are the same and that's very important.😊
That's wonderful. Hope it's still going well.
W
Agreed with rubbing his car engine. Also blasting his music when he drives by.
Rubbing one's car engine does seem a bit excessive.
Another turn-off could be a dirty car, full of trash, smelling from smoking or fast food. If you look tidy, so must be your ride. 🙂
Having poor hygiene is huge for both men and women. Nobody wants to be with somebody that has terrible hygiene and doesn’t take care of themselves. It’s a red flag for me, it’s disgusting.
Hygiene is a very recent developement. Even on the court in Versaiiles nobody saw a reason for it. During my Hippi time it was the same. As more dirty as more atreactive. Finally it is more healthy not avoiding bacteria as the immun system works better and you get no allergies.
I think it just will help you to make you feel good with yourself but it don't necessarily mean there will be plenty of women falling in love with you. I see some ugly guys with pretty woman, I just can't understand, they don't take care of themselves that much.
Real men love women who smell like codfish.
@@maritaschweizer1117 not true at all
Obsessive hygiene is equally unattractive.
There is only one type of place where a revving a car engine is appropriate: a racetrack! Drive safely, folks. Your passengers and other responsible drivers will appreciate it!
No trauma dumping. Yea, I bombed a relationship by doing that once. I eventually came to the conclusion that I could either pay a therapist to listen or take that stuff to the grave. Because, strangers dont want to be bummed out by your problems. And your guy friends also dont want to hear about it. It's just another reminder that no matter how many valued people you have in your life, we all die alone in the end. Embrace the suck and move along. And try some mushrooms to heal the PTSD if you can get some.
never open up to women
That's where it's helpful to have a female friend who you can really talk to. There's no interest on either side romantically, but women are more into male friendships generally than men. If you have some trauma to work through, a female friend is going to be the most receptive for you being able to open up about that and walk you through it.
@@anom6707 It's not at all true to not open up to women. Don't open up to the wrong woman. Also what this guy did by putting too much on a relationship and ended up trauma dumping, that can ruin a newer relationship. A well established one can handle it though.
"Too agreeable" yeah had that problem when i was younger. Used to think that if i diasagreed with a girl she would stop liking me. Also used to do this thing where if a girl mentioned she liked something id enthusiastically agree instead of sharing my own opinion. I think this a turn off for girls and seems desperate and they can tell what youre doing.
Charisma on Command talk about this. Charlie from there once disagreed with a girl who criticized the people in her town, he said he liked them (when it would have been easier to agree with her). He got with her. Having authenticity is good.
Many women will not like you if you disagree with them.
@@Imran-Lalaniyou might think that but subconsciously women are attracted to and respect a man who stands his ground and sticks to his beliefs and opinions
Women definitely prefer a man w/ his own opinions. It's nice to be challenged in conversation and to have some things to haggle over and get into deep and interesting discussions. Sense of humour about your differences really helps. Esp. if you needle each other and turn it into inside jokes, that can be bonding. Don't be obnoxious and a right fighter. That's the only thing that can turn either sex off pretty quick.
You know... I do not care anymore! I should not need to babysit a grown woman with what she wants and needs. I look after myself and she wants me to look after her as well? Seriously? Nah... I'll just find a mature stable woman - they exist in multitudes. If I find one where we both connect even better!
This topic of hygiene came on the right time. Today I have been talking with a married man, he was having a conversation with me, the distance between us was short enough. Guess what I started to smell a bad breath
coming from his side in the form of waves, it could kill a mosquito moving nearby😂, it was really annoying, I could not keep the conversation going for so long. Whenever I remember this smell, it is still in my nose till now. I will try to take a cup of tea containing flowers to ease me up.
As a childless person, I want to say happy Father's Day to any dad's on the comments and happy Sunday, Courtney ❤
The agreeable point is something I definitely struggle with. People pleasing is something of a coping/defense mechanism with the NDDs I suffer from and keeping that under wraps is quite exhausting, lol.
What’s NDD? People pleasing is a compensatory mechanism for me too, but for me it’s mostly due to growing up with undiagnosed autism. Not knowing how to be liked will do that to you.
Courtney thank you for your honest videos. When I get discouraged you really turn things around
I’m forever blessed by Courtney’s content.
I was revving my car and driving like an idiot with my current girlfriend the first time I met her, she was loving it and still does lol
I once got scolded by a close female friend for employing a bit of self-deprecating humor ("Strong back, Weak mind"). Didn't really understand the perspective at the time.
Most women hate self-deprecating humor because they're not intelligent enough to understand it. You have to read the room, and realize the woman usually has the brain cells of an amoeba.
#3 is why I haven’t put aftermarket exhaust on my Mustang. The exhaust still sounds good (V8), but it’s not so loud that it’s annoying.
If there's good rapport going on, particularly with the chivalry and being a gentleman point, I've found that instead of holding hands, offering my arm for her to hold onto is a great way to build physical chemistry and have that old-world sense of charm, without feeling pushy or needy.
Thanks as always for making these videos Courtney! You are a rockstar! So many great points here. I had positive results yesterday that may have turned the heads of a few girls at the restaurant yesterday. I got the chance to hold the door for an older gentleman with a walker and later a lady with carry out. The whole time there, I was pleasant, polite and acknowledged anyone with whom I saw. I was dressed nice and am in good shape, but I think the girls liked how I carried myself. Somebody else pointed out to me that they were checking me out because I never noticed. I have terrible girl radar. Haha. It was a nice moment. Point is fellas that how you carry yourself makes a huge impact more than designer label or a fancy car. Happy Father’s Day to all the great Dads out there!
I do this shit because I was brought up that way, I have no earthly idea if holding the door for men and women is putting off signals or what modern people are like. In retrospect I shouldn't have been *that* shutin, but the pandemic completely enabled me so whatever. Do people really think you're hitting on them when you do this?
I’ve recently had several guys from dating apps bring up after talking to me for a week and showing interest that “oh their ex just broke up with them a year ago.. and they were depressed early that year” or “hey can I ask a random question? So you think exes can be friends?” And went on about how they are friends. Or I went on a date 2 weeks ago where the guy was nice and flirty in the beginning but then asked my dating experiences on rhe app and went on about his.. how he matched with a professor from Ivy League school who canceled on him right before the date? SMH 🤦♀️. I’m just sitting there listening to them and thinking what the hell is wrong with them.. they are in their 30s and talking about exes /other dates before the first date or on the date while I’m RIGHT there. It feels horrible. I don’t understand how they don’t even have any awareness that they are in talking stages with me or on a date with me and we’re supposed to see if WE have a connection but you’re talking about other girls you dated? I felt like you are not interested in me and like I’m not good enough. It felt very disrespectful and I can’t trust you as any type of partner.
So yeah.. men don’t do this! It’s not cool nor respectful! I had to go off on one guy bc I got so fed of this after 3 guys did this recently the past few months..
I hate when people act like taking a step back, reanalyzing, not overly commiting when you haven't properly accessed a situation, not speaking out of your ass about things you don't know is perceived as a "lack of confidence" when those are all things that brought me success in life. It's like people purposefully want to find failure attractive, you have to bullshit to them about the steps you take to solve problems to seem like you don't have to "overly think" about a situation. Or maybe those people were never put in truly difficult situations to begin with.
Exactly! It’s a contradiction: you can’t be a jerk but at the same time you can’t think it through before acting, right?
I definitely agree with all of these. I was seeing a guy who kept bringing up the other women he was seeing. After asking him not to bring them up, he did it again & was shocked when I immediately ended things. If u have options, you don't need to tell others that you have options.
Except Courtney accidentally spilled the truth at 14:20 by admitting women want a guy that other women want: herd mentality. Sorry, but women don't get to have the "herd mentality" in the precious portion that's acceptable to them. if women are going to open that can of worms, they have to own it. You don't get to blame the guy. Nope.
Maybe you put him in a position where he felt the need to mention that he has other options in order to put you in your place. We don't see what lead up to it...only you know that.
I agree and understand all the points brought up in this video, but something really stood out to me revolving around two of the points. The first point about not talking down about yourself and the emotional vomit point, I think there is some significant correlation between these two things and why men’s mental health has been declining. All guys at some point in their life has insecurities and or trauma that goes completely unaddressed, and that burying is reinforced by the dynamic between men and women among others as well. Now I’m not blaming women, just pointing it out. I am someone who had a rough childhood and adolescents and certain things I experienced still have an effect on my to this day, and if not for me getting taken out of that situation and having some support, I would have no clue where I’d be today. Getting to the point though, there are very few people that I would even discuss my past with, and nobody that I would get into how I felt and still feel. I know from watching others how easily you can bring other people down or push people away by sharing these things, and I’d imagine I’m not the only one. Just as I said I’m not blaming women, I’m also not blaming society for this, it’s only natural to feel uncomfortable discussing and dealing with these issues, I’m just pointing out the reality for many people.
The male gaze was an old school term used in film theory classes to talk about over sexualization. Now it's a buzzword for tiktokers?? They love rebranding and recycling terminology and changing their connotations... which might not be a bad thing? I don't know where I'm going with this... Perfect video.
@I am me • 25y ago I think they're also butchering a lot of psychology terms and names of illnesses like ocd, trauma-bonding, depression, adhd, anxiety, etc. I think that's worse than the ones they come up with. Oh well...
Courtney, I loved this video, even though I have a few of the points to work on, but that is a good thing for my self-improvement. Men and women are attracted to very different things; I’d love to see a full video on this.
Happy Father’s Day to Captain Clayface aka Courtney’s dad!
Admiring a man's physique has more to do with men knowing how hard it is to achieve. The countless hours in the gym, eating right, taking supplements. Yes, we find discipline, dedication and hard work, cool! 💪🏾
Edit: It's not always done for the female gaze, taking care of your body is part of self-improvement.
This, it's why I can't f'ing stand this "thin privilege" bullshit. No, you have fat privilege, in other words the food privilege to have so much access to cheap food and needing to do so little physical work you can get like that. It's why it's so incredibly unattractive when women try and make it like having a physique and being fit is "privileged" hell no it takes a lot of hard work and hell of a lot of time to do it, and that requires taking massive amounts of daily sacrifices in not eating that snack, not getting the extra garlic bread, not eating so much fatty food and sweets. People who get really fit don't get there by being privileged: you get fit through a lot of hard work, personal sacrifices, and discipline; you get obese by being privileged. I still need to drop a good 10 pounds.
Don't act like we aren't visual beings who enjoy esthetics very much. It's a big part.
Her talking about about men taking gym selfies was weird too. It's mostly women who do this. I feel like there is a lot of projection in this video. She complains about men who assume that women will be impressed by things that men are (the car/revving example), and yet women are notorious for this. Older women lead with their career thinking men care. Then said women complain when they get passed over for a younger woman with less career attainment.
I think she’s saying to not be petty and revengeful. By taking the high road and keeping your chin up and being you. Your confident self. They pay attention.
Amen
A lot of the times guys flex their car skills to impress other guys, something I've always found weird. Like my mans just drive your car and chill out 😂 Looking gracious as always Courtney!
😂😂 thanks Aaron!
I've been on tinder for like almost a year now and have had ZERO matches since joining.
Can you make a video concerning tips and what you might do wrong on Tinder that makes women not swipe right?
Go outside and meet women face to face
@@claude6541 That doesn’t really help me with tinder.
I would heed the advice about not talking about ex's except I frequently get asked about it when I'm on dates. Especially "Why did you get divorced?" So then I'm forced to come up with some explanation.
The car and the motorcycle being tuned to perfection and sounding like the love I put into the hobby are for me. If women don’t like then then that’s totally fine, I can live with it
Women do really appreciate a mechanical guy and a passion for a hobby. They probably won't share your passion, like another mechanical man would, but she's still going to admire that you are good at that. Just about any woman I know likes a mechanical man, and really appreciates a man that can fix things. I think it's kind of like how men have no passion for keeping house and aren't going to put much into decor or cleaning. They still really like it when a woman comes along, scours it all down and adds her woman's touch.
I think the advent of feminism has had a very negative impact on society, as many women think they can have everything in every way without taking any responsibility for their actions and men are now just confused about what is expected. All the traditional masculine traits now seem to have come under the category of 'toxic' masculinity.
❤
Feminism is just misandry in disguise
@@1246-g2v somewhat ironically what used to be described as chivalrous is now described as anachronistic or misogyny.
Thank you in advance for mentioning hygiene, Courtney. I'm doing my laundry and am in need of a shower while I'm listening to you.
Wow!!! White is a really nice color on you, makes your eyes really stand out! Beautiful!
In regards to the bad driving manners, I have seen many instances where a bad driving decision either led to or nearly led to an accident. Too many times a driver will change lanes without turning their signal on, or try to turn off a road from a lane on the other side of the road (turning left from the far right lane, as an example). Trying to show off how fast your vehicle can go or how swift you can make a turn can and will go terribly wrong and may cost more than just simple car repairs.
This video was very helpful and informative I appreciate the fact that you take the time to go into detail with each topic Thank you Courtney
There's an engine revving epidemic in Arizona. One of the reasons I had to leave.
My now husband had a sickness where he sweats alot. He had a normal figure not very muscula nor overweight, but he was always sweaty and smelled a bit becasue of it. We had a few dates and before the fourht date, i had made up my mind about ending it, becasue i was kinda grossed out. in the middle of our date he told me about his sickness and a few months later he got better medication and now sweats like a normal person. Kinda sad how shallow we all are...
There are a lot of women who dress or act in a way that it encourages me to be chivalrous, but I refrain from doing it. I will take your word for a week, and give it 5 strikes.
I was in a car with 2 guys, 2 girls. The driver (male) was driving a sports car and revving his engine. 3 years later, we still make fun of him.
In regards to the first topic, the other way round. I remember giving up on a gorgeous girl who was "never up to the circumstance". She was wonderful, incredibly beautiful but she was always self-deprecating. I didn't "dump" her. I would never do, but I gave up. She is still the same, and single.
You look pretty Courtney #1, second you are 100 percent accurate on all the topics. I've been enjoying your videos and will continue to do so.
Self deprecation is not always a sign of no confidence can be just the opposite (not obsessively) that’s just weird. Kind and mannerly but not a lapdog (boundaries).
I appreciate this video. It made me think introspectively about I’d I do these things. Anytime you look inside, especially with somebody else “guiding” the questions, is a gift. Have a good day CCR
4:15 Literally reminded me of this TikTok where a guy revs his engine and a cop shouts over the P.A. system, “Shut up, idiot!” Funniest thing I’ve ever seen! 😂😂😂
Your tone and general affect is wonderful. And as a bonus you're full of great manly advice!
These ought to be interesting; fortunately I learned things like these in my early twenties and being in my early thirties I'm definitely having a lot more fun, and a lot better of experiences
8. Not being calm - aka being hyper, extra, nervous, etc. Most people hate us.
break down emotionally; watching corn; simping; top three things to never do in front of a woman, or ever
The car thing actually depends on the girl, my sister in-law loves driving fast, and such. She actually pushes the boundaries of safety more than my brother does.
It can depend. I used to have the lead foot on highways when I first met my ex. He was quite the grandma when he drove. He didn't say too much about it when we first started dating, as it was my car and he never had his own. After we'd been going out for years, he turned into the worst backseat driver. It actually harassed me into letting him drive most of the time, which was his goal. If we were on a trip to pick up relatives or something though, they would get frustrated w/ how slow and even ginger he was about even changing lanes to not get stuck in slow traffic. They'd be super relieved if I took over driving.
Driving is a weird one. I've been with women who both loved and hated speeding. Most of them actually enjoyed it, coming to think of it. But there is being obnoxious, endangering yourself and others type of driving when you are just being an annoyance and there is fun driving where you occasionally launch it on a clear road just to experience that exhilarating acceleration.
Hi Courtney, I think that you are right on the ball with this one !!! I really appreciate your point of view !!! Thank you Hun ❣️Patrick
I'm enjoying this new arc of Courtney videos. The butter churning arc. 😁
I'm hoping I'm not doing any of these things listed here. 😬We'll see. If I am I'm ready to make some adjustments. *presses play*
There was nothing new here.
Dont wear sunglasses inside, even if you're by yourself in the grocery store.
Also, 90% of people don't care about your problems, the other 10% are glad you have them.
Some of us actually have sensitive eyes and need them. Fuck off
Indeed
Good video. Thanks Courtney. Now i know what to do if a woman i don't wanna be with tries to get overly friendly. Thumbs up
I can say with confidence that all of these go both ways accept for driving fast. It's kind of hot if a woman knows how to drive fast or enjoys a brisk drive once in a while. Never in a place where you might put others at risk.
The reason i go along with thing and im agreeable is because i dont care enough most of the time. Where we eat what we do where we go. These are things i dont care about so it does not matter to me what the choice is.
Definitely agree with most of your points, especially the manner in which we drive. Fellas, I’ve done this and Courtney is correct- females want to feel safe. Don’t mess up your date for the sake of showing off.
I've fallen into #1 and #4 many times in the past, so that's totally valid. Re #3, female gaze is totally a Thing, let us not deny that. Those of us not blessed with things like looks, height, and muscles *will* be ignored. Speaking from experience, there, of course. I tend to be direct because I believe in not BSing anybody; it's not my fault that people are easily offended by everything these days. As per the last two things, well...I went through a pretty bad divorce 16 years ago and when I finally got over myself and began the process of reforging myself? I finally reached a point where I could be and can be completely objective about my part in it now and can safely say I learned more than I thought I had before. With all that having been said? I'm a happy bachelor and intend on keeping it that way for a couple of reasons.
I've inadvertently done the speeding thing in my work truck. I drive for FedEx, and through a combination of being in a rush and not feeling well, went a bit too fast in a parking lot. A girl in a Tesla chewed me out for going too fast and not being careful
How did you respond? The general public has no idea the amount of pressure and packages you have to deliver on a daily basis! And that's not including the peak holiday season.
@TheWedabest I just told her that I was already late and didn't have the time to discuss it. She, in turn, told me to slow down because there were elderly people around
Yep. Your mind tries to complete what it pictures. So, no negative thoughts! And, thoughts are "things."
Noticed your catalog
You haven't had a self improvement video for a while.
That is the most attractive thing to me about your channel, with dating second
5:01 it's like how bodybuilders end up getting more attention from guys than women just like these dudes burning their oil and gas get more attention from boys than they do adult women. Only gold diggers care about your car Bro, Other Women care about your shoulders your heart your brain and your jokes
5:37 that's hilarious I literally was just talking about that hahaha fellows if you can get the swimmer's body the warrior's body where the athlete's buddy you will be just fine. Looks do open doors but personality and mental fortitude keep you inside those doors
fighters body is good as well
@@kc270352 which is in the same range as the warrior's body hahaha
I hate that confidence is seen as a virtue. The only people who are confident are rarely intelligent and they are rarely right. Ever heard someone described as 'seldom doubtful but often wrong'? Intelligent people know how easy it is to be wrong and appreciate the consequences of their mistakes. Also, it's virtually impossible to differentiate confidence from not giving a shit. It's easy to appear confident when the consequences are negligible. People ACT confident to dupe people: they are shysters.
It's a fine line between confidence and cockiness or delusion. What you're describing is verging on the later. Confident people are aware of their mistakes, but they handle them with more grace. I've met plenty of confident people, and I've noticed two things - confidence is silent, never boastful, and it takes a lot of emotional intelligence.
Confidence IS a virtue. Are u supposed to feel pity for yourself and self loathe?
Confidence is a virtue. It shows that you've pushed yourself beyond your comfortable boundaries and have achieved some level of insight and competence.
I know where my limits are. I know how I respond to failures and success. I know how hard I will work to achieve goals. I'm confident as heck because I've tasted the vinegar of failure and have persevered when all my doubts and fears urged me to stop.
@@giorgosdro7059 Confidence is not a virtue, doing good for your fellow man is a virtue. Your precious inner feelings won't make the history books.
@@mgancarzjr Confidence is not a virtue, doing good for your fellow man is a virtue. Your precious inner feelings won't make the history books.
I had a house mate who during the interview stage was fine, but once he moved in, he never showered. We counted 3 months before he even did. He smelt so bad I could smell his footprints on the kitchen floor...it was amazing and disgusting at the same time lol
Solid video as usual. Thank you Courtney and happy Father’s Day to all the fathers out there!
I'm here to tell you right now: we don't care!
Thanks Courtney. Been following you for a couple of years now. In answer to your Q. Please do a m/f gaze comparison. I'd be fascinated
Never had these as issues, although my experience is few females truly appreciate honesty, and I don't mean being blunt.
thank you for your love Coloatno Ryan...You are a blessing to all men...
Hey Courtney! I’m a regular viewer of the videos. I want to know if you have any pointers for me. I’m almost done with college. I’m currently spending my summer in Europe, mostly in the Netherlands. I’ve worked really hard on my emotional and mental health. I don’t wear my heart on my sleeve as much as I used to. I’ve managed to maintain a small circle of friends, especially with a female friend, even though I’m often socially awkward. Is there anything more I can do? I love all the videos you do. You have a very attractive character, and one I would like in a future partner.
Stop worrying so much.
I think most car people can agree we do not care about how others view our car, if you find it annoying but it makes someone else happy, for example those 2 teenage boys interacting with the driver, that will make our day. Plus most car people date other car people, if a woman is disinterested in cars, from what ive seen guys dont go for them at all.
Turn ons for women:
- being a psychopath
-being a narcissist
- being a serial killer
- treating her like garbage
-cheating on her
Nice guys finish last, bad boys finish on her face.
So no pies for the bad boys..
Agreed and then come back to the good boys to clean up the mess
Money 💰
Having a bad day?
@@MikeyP109 he's right you know
Happy Father's day to all the Fathers out there!
This is actually one of the best videos about dating i've seen, thank you Courtney
Yes to the video on female vs. male gaze!
The revving the engine thing is also annoying to me too as a man because at my dorm there’s this guy who owns a car with a really loud muffler who drives around every night and when he’s on the road he revs his engine so loudly that I thought I’d lose my hearing one time!
So yeah, revving your engine is unattractive to women and it says something about your personality towards anyone too.
Thank you, Courtney! I need a break. These tips are sure to make great women repellant.
Totally agree with you on the engine revving. There's 3 categories for it though. 1 is teens or import kids who drive a turd of a Honda or other import being obnoxious on a Tuesday night. 2 it's f boys in their diesels or new sports cars like a corvette or audi and 3 is a classic that's a turd in progress like a squarebody chevy or classic car. Restored classics people will look at differently for being loud at idle or taking off at a light but the attention is natural so no need to drive stupid
I'm glad you brought up negative self talk bc like you said our thoughts definitely creates our reality
It's definitely the reality I'm currently in.
@@xjoemallardx It's hard work, but you need to counter all the negative chatter. You have a lot of good attributes too. I'm sure you have bad, like we all do, but you're likely amplifying and magnifying the bad, or even conflating them. What you think is all bad, some women will think is neutral and might even see as pretty ok. Like if you have certain insecurities and she has similar, you can put each other at ease. Focus on your good. As hard as you've been hyerpfocusing on the bad, or what you percieve as bad,hyperfocus away from it to your best attributes, and make sure to include all the neutral and average ones too. Most of us are average, so that's all good.
Courtney, another very informative video. Great job!
My regular partner actually likes me to drive fast. So let's not generalize things because some women are anxious and don't trust the person driving. Women are not all like that. Find the woman that fits with your personnality instead of changing for her. Changing for someone does not work. It leads to frustration and enventually resentment. Find the right girl, she's out there guys! 😎👍
That's literally 75% of her content; personal opinions and claiming all women are exactly like her. She's wrong quite often.
She over generalizes many things. In this video she says "all women". She has no idea what all women want. Maybe its just click bait.
Oh well... at least she still makes me think harder about relationship stuff. And I've seen way worse than her content for sure. 😜
@@MikeyP109 It's absolutely click bait. She's also very redundant. She has a lack of content so she just recycles the same things in different lists so she can put out more videos. More videos, more advertisements. She's just cashing in on simps with disingenuous, broad brush statements that only really apply to her.
@@Swearengen1980 It's sad, but what many men don't realize is that there are women out there who are going to leave you no matter how good looking, smart, or rich you are. They are wired up bad and get off on chasing after a guy but then start the discard process at some point. They often repeat this behavior. It's devastating. It's mind-blowing to see that there are women that are still relatively happy with POS husband when there are elite men out there with fucking six packs, are wealthy, have status, and devoted but are getting dumped simply because a woman like to jump from cock to cock.
I actually find you very knowledgeable
“Im not trying to die” 😂😂😂 the emphasis on that was funny…@4:37
Happy father days courtney! Thank you for teaching us how to become "daddies" for the women in our lives ❤
The moment you as a man accept that she wants to know you can provide, protect, and please her ego you can get most women.
Gotta love the hypocrisy of #1:
Never doubt, critisize or talk bad about yourself - EVER.
But if she does it every other day, you are expected to support her - no matter how stupid the reason is. Double standards much?
Screw what girls say: NEVER show any weakness. If you have problems, talk with your family or your best friends. If UR girl asks, just say: "Don't worry about it. It will be fine."
Are you choosing to support her repeated negative self cycle?
@@datruth8991dude, they are all negative. Just give it time, my man!
Just stay away from the extremes... there's a middle ground and that's where you want to be. A little bit of vulnerability is attractive, a lot is gross.
@twilight1181 there isn’t one woman out there who is confident and secure!
@@daniellehotsky1776 A bit bitter at the moment yeah I'll admit that.
The thing is, I never heard "don't show weakness" but I saw that it was never really accepted or seen like something positive. More like "I have to take care now euuh". Maybe it was on the girls but maybe it's something deeper. I found that talking about the real hurts with friends to work out waaay smoother in the long run as with partners.
But yeah - I agree with you that those are HUGE red flags and real downers if it's all the time and non-stop doubting. Tiresome, man.
As a guy and fan of fast American Muscle cars (Proud Mustang owner), even I can't stand revving your engines and I find it very annoying and you're not doing your engine any favor in a long run.
My wife of 25 years loved my fast cars. I also had a decent amount of other things going for me though too.
All solid points to be fair. With 7 I agree it doesn't really come across as confident when you have to blurr it out which kind of goes into number 6. But the girl really does want to know that out of all the other girls, you chose her and only her. She just doesn't wana hear about all the girls who crashed and burned before her. This is a good example of "if she doesn't ask, then don't tell."
These are so many great points. You are so correct, Courtney!
According to Margret, your chronic nose picking is a real turn off.
@@Omar_Zazzle
That's number 8 on the list.
Courtney you are a treasure. Your thoughts and advice are always so down to earth and genuine and have helped me so much. Thank you!
Oh, nice, I will try to get all 7
I went out on a couple of first dates this past week. On the first, I paid for dinner, which i think was a bit of a pleasant surprise for the woman (she's a well-paid professional and I'm a modestly comfortable retiree, so she makes _way_ more than I do). On the second date, I gave her a box of chocolate*. it was a pretty warm day, so as we were leaving in our own cars, I had her leave her passenger door open to give the air conditioning time to cool off the interior. Not exactly chivalry, but definitely smart, take-charge thinking.
*I made a point of asking her in advance, by text, if she liked chocolate. I replied "Note taken," which she liked. When I showed up for the date, I had her chocolate - quality chocolate - in a nice paper bag. But also inside the bag was an ordinary Hershey bar, which is what I pulled out first. I quickly took it back and gave her the real thing, and she seemed to think it was funny. I also let her keep the Hershey bar; you think I was gonna' be a jerk? 😁
Agree with all. Things learned the hard way of what not to do.
Being your authentic self or completely changing as a man to attract a woman doesn’t actually matter; if she ever finds you attractive, it’s always temporary anyway… be un-emotionally emotionally available, always be assertive and confident… unless it’s something she says otherwise, Don’t be dangerous, but also Don’t be boring, but also be exciting and spontaneous, while also being dependable and consistent.
….. Just be physically attractive, loaded, and popular; while being willing to admit you’re always wrong🤷🏻👍
All of this applies to women too!
The third point which you mentioned just doesn't apply to me since I use public transport .... Lol ... 😀. Anyways, nice informative video, Courtney Ryan ... 👍.
I honestly get annoyed when friends of mine, both men and women forget deodorant, or even not shower like they should. Terrible hygiene can mess up both relationships and even friendships.
Negativ self talk... Im just acknowledging reality.