i have a complicated history with romance genre, partially due to being an aromantic person and queer. most romcoms don't appeal to me but there exceptions and i find that i spend a lot of my time in fandom thinking / writing about romantic ships that i love. most of the time i think it boils down to preferring a story to have bigger things at play than romance (strong plot, the characters embody themes, the characters act the same within the relationship as they would even if it wasn't a romantic relationship, etc) for similar reasons that i prefer the higher stakes of fantasy/sci fi stories to contemporary works (and even then, have some of the latter as my favourites). i think some of it is "Romance is the most important thing ever" that is saturated in society so much > "romance and romantic feelings can be important, if your partner is your top priority they should also be your friend / have unconditional love for each other" and not usually liking more traditional cishet male leads (but there is increasingly more romance marketed towards queer ppl, which is nice).
To your point about women not being able to distinguish between novels and real relationships. I'm not sure I believed that grown women woud see a toxic male lead and think "Great. Ill seek him out in real life." It's more that I thought that women already in toxic relationships would see those books confirm that those relationships are normal. Seeing other women praise those books and those toxic fictional men would make their real life partners seem less escapable. I talked to a trans woman once about the toxic romances of booktok. We concluded that there are a lot of straight, cis women from conservative backgrounds who are just starting to realize that they can have romantic and sexual fantasies. They can't imagine healthy ones, but they're overly excited about smut, in a very puritanical way, because they've been repressed for so long. They're playing out their late self-discovery in a very public way. Plus, as a woman, it's super embarrassing to see women screaming with excitement over a horrible "love" interest. It probably makes relatively good men feel uncomfortable too, and not just for reasons of misogyny.
I agree. Also, it seems like those authors write those toxic traits in men as if those are the ones that make them attractive and hot, which bothers me personally. It's like if they wrote a nice, gentle, healthy male love interest, it would suddenly be boring or not "spicy" enough, which is simply not true. Maybe my opinion is a little biased since I haven't read romance books in a long time and never enjoyed the genre in the first place, but it's what I've noticed in the recent years, especially in romantasy books.
I was surprised when I saw the views and comments. This deserves way more recognition, very interesting deep dive into romance! Personally, I indeed find romance to be cringeworthy and cheesy, but that's because I didn't take the time to look deeper into the genre and find actual literature, only the superficial, marketable books. My favourite genre will always be horror, suspense, thriller and mystery, though.
One of the wonders of reading is that it allows the reader to immerse themselves in intense experiences without facing any personal consequences. This is why people can enjoy high-stakes fantasy: readers get to feel the adrenaline of following a character who fights for their life, without ever being in real danger. They can explore the uncertainty of characters who don't know when they’ll eat next, whether they’ll see their loved ones again, or even if they’ll survive the day, all while remaining safe themselves. The same holds true for romance. Many readers are drawn to the heightened emotions and dramatic, even dangerous or unhealthy, fictional relationships precisely BECAUSE they are fictional. These stories allow the readers to indulge in the thrill and emotions without any risk of personal harm. For their own life, they certainly DO NOT want any insecurity or constant shadow of fear. They want safety and reliability. Whether it's fantasy, mystery, or romance - readers seek safety and comfort in their own lives. In the books they read, they still can enjoy (or for some even prefer) the excitement of something far different.
Maya Rodale (that is now a Historical Romance author) says in her book "Dangerous Books For Girls: The Bad Reputation of Romance Novels Explained" the same thing you said, about considering romance books terrible, until she started reading them. Indeed, that book is a very good complement for your video (is it almost 10 years old e a little bit outdated, but I think is still a relevant read). All the genres have good and bad cheap books, but for romance all books are terrible. It's almost a 10-15 years moral panic cycle: 10 years ago, it was about 50 shades, now is about "too much sex" in romance novels. My friends, romance now it's not different for novels from 20, 30, 40 years ago in terms of sex in them. Erotica is not invented em 2010's. It's sad but, people always will complain about romance books. But I love them, a lot of people love them as well, so read what you like and try not be an idiot about other people's literary taste. P.S: it's so ridiculous (and misogynist) thinks that women are so dumb that they don't know how to separate fiction from reality and that women don't know that toxic relationships in real life are bad.
whats ridiculous is acting like a lot of people who read toxic romances arent young teenagers who, yes, sometimes lack foresight, which is what most of the criticism is aimed at. why does everyone act like theyre the main representative of their community? there are other people reading these books beside you, and theyre marketed towards them as well.
@@kinrateia First, teenage girls are not dumb. Second content rating exits for a reason. Or you think certain topics should not be addressed, because teenagers and children should not read or watch this content? If young people are reading violent books that is age inappropriate, the problem it's not the content itself (are you concern with teenagers reading graphic horror books too?) I think content rating needs to be more applied in books with more graphic content. Romance genre it's not the problem. I don't think authors that write dark romances has 14-year-old teenagers in mind as its target audience (or any adult romance authors in general).
@@jessicacordovadepariz8761 obviously i dont think all teenagers are dumb. i think a lot of them lack experience and understanding of the real world stakes to recognise a toxic situation, especially when narrative isnt written with goal of exposing toxicity in mind. I had so many teenage friends fall into toxic relationships, and it's silly to say media and lack of education about heatlhy relationships don't play a role. And while authors dont write books with teenagers in mind, books are often marketed with them in mind by careless people. A lot of books by Coleen Hoover (im sorry for mentioning her i know its like biggest favorite argument of people who hate romance) find their ways on YA shelves, and Ana Huangs books are literally intended YA and are marketed at young audiences, which doesnt stop them from being pretty toxic and posessive and reinstating gender norms in mega harmful ways. Like, OF COURSE there are people who write romance books intended for teenagers who still make them toxic relationships. Our culture is encouraging them. These authors arent villains, but this does happen, and I am so tired of people acting like every person in the world has impeccable critical media analysis skills, when if anything media comprehension is arguably getting worse as a trend. Like it or not, there ARE a lot of people, a lot of young people, who romanticise toxic behaviour in books because they were already brought up to and books only drive it further. Romance is one of few genres that actually has impact on our cultural perception of relationships and dynamics between people, so approaching it with nuance insted of just saying actually everyone who criticises it just doesnt get it and is trying to bring it down is not productive. There are so many wonderful romance books. But most popular romance isnt about healthy relationships, because its a bit boring, problem is though that people stoppped monitoring who is reading these books, because it doesnt matter if they get sold.
I fail to understand why, if a toxic relationship is unacceptable in real life, it would be acceptable or entertaining in a novel, except as a cautionary tale. What we read about important topics like relationships influences us whether we want to admit it or not. Some women are already in toxic relationships, and don't need to see books with those relationships normalized and praised. Some women are from backgrounds where they can't imagine healthy relationships and they need to hear other women point out how the relationships portrayed in these books are toxic. So no, I don't think all women can tell the difference between a healthy relationship and a toxic one, in fiction or real life. That doesn't even touch on the issue of these books being marketed to teenagers, who often really can't tell the difference between good and bad role models due to their inexperience.
I don't think being influenced by fiction makes someone dumb. Fiction and medias do influence us, that's why it's so useful and propaganda often starts there. On its own, a romance book depicting unhealthy, abusive or toxic relationships as romantic might not be too bad, but considering the society we live in, it might reinforce some outdated ideas, like girls having to put up with a man who don't treat them well. Not everyone knows how a toxic relationship might look like in real life, it's often more subtle. Especially if you're young or you have never experienced a healthy relationship before, it might convince you further more that this is peak romance and how a couple should look like, especially if those male characters are only praised online. Obviously, not everyone will come to that conclusion. But I think we (both readers and authors) should reflect on that subject, why we write romance that way, why we like it. I can only speak for myself, but in middle school I used to consume a lot of animes where a lot of jokes were just guys being pervert on girls. It made me uncomfortable, but every time I talked about it, people told me to stop being sensitive and that it was just a joke. I was already taught to ignore my own discomfort to please others, and it only reinforced that. And it reinforced the idea to guys that harassing a girl was just a joke, not something to take seriously. Same with bad young adult romance I read, where at first I hated the male love interest, but people kept gushing about them as if they were amazing, and so I started thinking it must be what an ideal man look like for most teenagers my age. Now, as an adult, I threw those ideas away and I don't think like that anymore, but I had to work on myself and the fact that I was in a healthy relationship with a very gentle woman really helped to make me realize /this/ is the type of romance/relationship I need. So, while I don't think all romance books are bad, I do think romance authors should be careful about how they write romance, just like for any other subject. (Sorry if there are mistakes, btw, I'm not a native english speaker)
Thank you for your video!:) In some ways, I have a problematic relationship with the romance genre. I have always read romance books and mostly enjoyed them. At the same time, I study (Finnish) literature at the university and have noticed talking down my romance reads if my course friend for example sees me reading romance in the hallway. None of them has ever said anything about those books but I seem to have internalized the idea of romance being a lesser genre so I avoid being seen as a romance reader in my "literature circle". There are several courses I wouldn't have survived, like the Finnish literature in the 1800s, without my Red White and Royal Blues:,)
ahh thank you for commenting, so interesting! come to think of it i also always have to preface me liking romance books with “look i read litfic too”, “i enjoy dostoevsky”, “i am a thriller fan” which is silly :) but sometimes it’s the only way to get people to listen to you and take you seriously
I appreciated your brief tangent into Taylor Swift: it illustrated your point so well. The art and artists we love can be fabulous, but they aren’t above criticism. I think it’s fair to love a book or artist and yet remain a bit skeptical. Wonderful video! You do an excellent job researching and presenting and I’m very engaged with your videos.
Great video essay, as always! What always baffles me with romance, as a casual reader of the genre, is that in our society, the majority of humans do seek partnership…romantic partners to share lives with. Like the basis of humanity but for some reasons (I agree with the ones you gave) it’s “stupid and vapid” and this comes from someone on the ace spectrum. As if, for bad or for worse, we’re not always pushed into being in relationships in real life but when it’s in a romance novel, that’s somehow wrong and stupid and ONLY FOR WOMEN? Make it make sense.
I have seen some people mentioning how there are other genres like fantasy and thriller and horror and that no one calls out these people for reading about toxic people or doubt their ability to separate fiction from reality. There is some truth to it. However, I have never seen a thriller reader make a list of the best bookish killers or a list of favourite dreamy killers (ironically, these lists are mostly only made by young romance readers). I have never seen a fantasy reader make list of top 10 hottest strategies to fight back your enemy nation that can be applied to real life. But its only the romance readers who specifically make a list of these hot alpha bookish boyfriends (every single of those guys are infinitely toxic and deserve to be jailed for all the shit they do the main girl). So, yes, most women are able to differentiate between fiction and reality but not all young girls are. And when you see large number of these best hottest book boyfriends and see the naive and even deranged comments seriously fawning about how much they want a Zade (a stalker and a murderer) in real life, you realise how serious this concern is. Sadly, some of them have also taken to harrassing real life people (ice-hockey players), make petitione to save a criminal who has committed heinous crimes and murdered women. I have also seen some comments about letting women enjoy what they want in including stories where they can turn their brain off (which is not even possible unless you are asleep or dead, but okay I'll take that) and it is fair. But just because you are not thinking hard while reading doesn't mean you can't think about what you read once you are done with that story or some other time. We as humans are constantly thinking, so this is not even something we have to force ourselves to do. So, I really don't get this excuse of reading book while turning off the brain. I am a woman who used to read Wattpad books during my teenage years and looked upto these badboys and playboys as the ideal boyfriend and it took me quite some time to understand how harmful and dangerous that kind of thinking was for myself. People can read whatever they want, given that they also take time to think critically about what they are reading. We all have those stories that we love but also know have a lot of vaild criticisms. I can still accept that these readers don't want to think critically about the stories they are consuming, which is again fair, since its their lives. But, what I do find utterly unacceptable is the way they all attack and bully other people who think critically.
Some points: Two words: Adult. Fiction. Adult female readers are intelligent enough to differentiate between fiction and real life. Other genres also have set tropes, not just romance. If you’re after romance without s3x scenes, they have separated it into another sub-genre, and it’s called sweet romance.
wasting time on reading/watching someone's fictional relationships instead of doing it by yourself is what makes me hate it, probably the only genre combined with isekai that i hate. I dont think someone who is succeseful in life and has a partner they wanted will read romance, those who lack one and could not get will be obsessed, just like isekai, for losers that daydream of another life
uhh what a take can only speak from my experience, i am certainly not obsessed with romances (though we should define “obsessed” here :) but i do enjoy them if they are written well and there are some out there that i absolutely adore ❤️ and love/relationship aspect of my life is maybe the only one that i have been 100% happy with for years so idk 🤷🏻♀️ + you are reading about someone’s life and relationships no matter which genre of books you end up picking up, no?
weak take that can be applied to every single fiction book that uses real-life as base for the story no matter the genre, therefore not a valid one. go read non-fiction and worry about looking like the loser you already are somewhere else.
i have a complicated history with romance genre, partially due to being an aromantic person and queer. most romcoms don't appeal to me but there exceptions and i find that i spend a lot of my time in fandom thinking / writing about romantic ships that i love. most of the time i think it boils down to preferring a story to have bigger things at play than romance (strong plot, the characters embody themes, the characters act the same within the relationship as they would even if it wasn't a romantic relationship, etc) for similar reasons that i prefer the higher stakes of fantasy/sci fi stories to contemporary works (and even then, have some of the latter as my favourites). i think some of it is "Romance is the most important thing ever" that is saturated in society so much > "romance and romantic feelings can be important, if your partner is your top priority they should also be your friend / have unconditional love for each other" and not usually liking more traditional cishet male leads (but there is increasingly more romance marketed towards queer ppl, which is nice).
To your point about women not being able to distinguish between novels and real relationships. I'm not sure I believed that grown women woud see a toxic male lead and think "Great. Ill seek him out in real life." It's more that I thought that women already in toxic relationships would see those books confirm that those relationships are normal. Seeing other women praise those books and those toxic fictional men would make their real life partners seem less escapable. I talked to a trans woman once about the toxic romances of booktok. We concluded that there are a lot of straight, cis women from conservative backgrounds who are just starting to realize that they can have romantic and sexual fantasies. They can't imagine healthy ones, but they're overly excited about smut, in a very puritanical way, because they've been repressed for so long. They're playing out their late self-discovery in a very public way. Plus, as a woman, it's super embarrassing to see women screaming with excitement over a horrible "love" interest. It probably makes relatively good men feel uncomfortable too, and not just for reasons of misogyny.
I agree. Also, it seems like those authors write those toxic traits in men as if those are the ones that make them attractive and hot, which bothers me personally. It's like if they wrote a nice, gentle, healthy male love interest, it would suddenly be boring or not "spicy" enough, which is simply not true.
Maybe my opinion is a little biased since I haven't read romance books in a long time and never enjoyed the genre in the first place, but it's what I've noticed in the recent years, especially in romantasy books.
I was surprised when I saw the views and comments. This deserves way more recognition, very interesting deep dive into romance! Personally, I indeed find romance to be cringeworthy and cheesy, but that's because I didn't take the time to look deeper into the genre and find actual literature, only the superficial, marketable books. My favourite genre will always be horror, suspense, thriller and mystery, though.
thank youu ❤️ hahha fellow thriller/mystery lover here 🫱🏼🫲🏽
One of the wonders of reading is that it allows the reader to immerse themselves in intense experiences without facing any personal consequences. This is why people can enjoy high-stakes fantasy: readers get to feel the adrenaline of following a character who fights for their life, without ever being in real danger. They can explore the uncertainty of characters who don't know when they’ll eat next, whether they’ll see their loved ones again, or even if they’ll survive the day, all while remaining safe themselves.
The same holds true for romance. Many readers are drawn to the heightened emotions and dramatic, even dangerous or unhealthy, fictional relationships precisely BECAUSE they are fictional. These stories allow the readers to indulge in the thrill and emotions without any risk of personal harm. For their own life, they certainly DO NOT want any insecurity or constant shadow of fear. They want safety and reliability.
Whether it's fantasy, mystery, or romance - readers seek safety and comfort in their own lives. In the books they read, they still can enjoy (or for some even prefer) the excitement of something far different.
Maya Rodale (that is now a Historical Romance author) says in her book "Dangerous Books For Girls: The Bad Reputation of Romance Novels Explained" the same thing you said, about considering romance books terrible, until she started reading them. Indeed, that book is a very good complement for your video (is it almost 10 years old e a little bit outdated, but I think is still a relevant read).
All the genres have good and bad cheap books, but for romance all books are terrible. It's almost a 10-15 years moral panic cycle: 10 years ago, it was about 50 shades, now is about "too much sex" in romance novels. My friends, romance now it's not different for novels from 20, 30, 40 years ago in terms of sex in them. Erotica is not invented em 2010's. It's sad but, people always will complain about romance books. But I love them, a lot of people love them as well, so read what you like and try not be an idiot about other people's literary taste.
P.S: it's so ridiculous (and misogynist) thinks that women are so dumb that they don't know how to separate fiction from reality and that women don't know that toxic relationships in real life are bad.
whats ridiculous is acting like a lot of people who read toxic romances arent young teenagers who, yes, sometimes lack foresight, which is what most of the criticism is aimed at. why does everyone act like theyre the main representative of their community? there are other people reading these books beside you, and theyre marketed towards them as well.
@@kinrateia First, teenage girls are not dumb. Second content rating exits for a reason. Or you think certain topics should not be addressed, because teenagers and children should not read or watch this content? If young people are reading violent books that is age inappropriate, the problem it's not the content itself (are you concern with teenagers reading graphic horror books too?) I think content rating needs to be more applied in books with more graphic content. Romance genre it's not the problem. I don't think authors that write dark romances has 14-year-old teenagers in mind as its target audience (or any adult romance authors in general).
@@jessicacordovadepariz8761 obviously i dont think all teenagers are dumb. i think a lot of them lack experience and understanding of the real world stakes to recognise a toxic situation, especially when narrative isnt written with goal of exposing toxicity in mind. I had so many teenage friends fall into toxic relationships, and it's silly to say media and lack of education about heatlhy relationships don't play a role. And while authors dont write books with teenagers in mind, books are often marketed with them in mind by careless people. A lot of books by Coleen Hoover (im sorry for mentioning her i know its like biggest favorite argument of people who hate romance) find their ways on YA shelves, and Ana Huangs books are literally intended YA and are marketed at young audiences, which doesnt stop them from being pretty toxic and posessive and reinstating gender norms in mega harmful ways. Like, OF COURSE there are people who write romance books intended for teenagers who still make them toxic relationships. Our culture is encouraging them. These authors arent villains, but this does happen, and I am so tired of people acting like every person in the world has impeccable critical media analysis skills, when if anything media comprehension is arguably getting worse as a trend. Like it or not, there ARE a lot of people, a lot of young people, who romanticise toxic behaviour in books because they were already brought up to and books only drive it further. Romance is one of few genres that actually has impact on our cultural perception of relationships and dynamics between people, so approaching it with nuance insted of just saying actually everyone who criticises it just doesnt get it and is trying to bring it down is not productive. There are so many wonderful romance books. But most popular romance isnt about healthy relationships, because its a bit boring, problem is though that people stoppped monitoring who is reading these books, because it doesnt matter if they get sold.
I fail to understand why, if a toxic relationship is unacceptable in real life, it would be acceptable or entertaining in a novel, except as a cautionary tale. What we read about important topics like relationships influences us whether we want to admit it or not. Some women are already in toxic relationships, and don't need to see books with those relationships normalized and praised. Some women are from backgrounds where they can't imagine healthy relationships and they need to hear other women point out how the relationships portrayed in these books are toxic. So no, I don't think all women can tell the difference between a healthy relationship and a toxic one, in fiction or real life. That doesn't even touch on the issue of these books being marketed to teenagers, who often really can't tell the difference between good and bad role models due to their inexperience.
I don't think being influenced by fiction makes someone dumb. Fiction and medias do influence us, that's why it's so useful and propaganda often starts there. On its own, a romance book depicting unhealthy, abusive or toxic relationships as romantic might not be too bad, but considering the society we live in, it might reinforce some outdated ideas, like girls having to put up with a man who don't treat them well. Not everyone knows how a toxic relationship might look like in real life, it's often more subtle. Especially if you're young or you have never experienced a healthy relationship before, it might convince you further more that this is peak romance and how a couple should look like, especially if those male characters are only praised online.
Obviously, not everyone will come to that conclusion. But I think we (both readers and authors) should reflect on that subject, why we write romance that way, why we like it.
I can only speak for myself, but in middle school I used to consume a lot of animes where a lot of jokes were just guys being pervert on girls. It made me uncomfortable, but every time I talked about it, people told me to stop being sensitive and that it was just a joke. I was already taught to ignore my own discomfort to please others, and it only reinforced that. And it reinforced the idea to guys that harassing a girl was just a joke, not something to take seriously. Same with bad young adult romance I read, where at first I hated the male love interest, but people kept gushing about them as if they were amazing, and so I started thinking it must be what an ideal man look like for most teenagers my age.
Now, as an adult, I threw those ideas away and I don't think like that anymore, but I had to work on myself and the fact that I was in a healthy relationship with a very gentle woman really helped to make me realize /this/ is the type of romance/relationship I need.
So, while I don't think all romance books are bad, I do think romance authors should be careful about how they write romance, just like for any other subject. (Sorry if there are mistakes, btw, I'm not a native english speaker)
I don't have problems with Romance, my problems is with Watppad and bad writting. Bad writting seems to be popular now 🤡
The lack of variety in romance these days is REAL! I diskile smut to bits and can hardly find any book that isn't smuttified😂
hahah real i am ok with smut as long as it’s not ALL smut 😂
Thank you for your video!:) In some ways, I have a problematic relationship with the romance genre. I have always read romance books and mostly enjoyed them. At the same time, I study (Finnish) literature at the university and have noticed talking down my romance reads if my course friend for example sees me reading romance in the hallway. None of them has ever said anything about those books but I seem to have internalized the idea of romance being a lesser genre so I avoid being seen as a romance reader in my "literature circle". There are several courses I wouldn't have survived, like the Finnish literature in the 1800s, without my Red White and Royal Blues:,)
Ps. you definitely won't find any modern romance books mentioned in our courses either
ahh thank you for commenting, so interesting!
come to think of it i also always have to preface me liking romance books with “look i read litfic too”, “i enjoy dostoevsky”, “i am a thriller fan” which is silly :)
but sometimes it’s the only way to get people to listen to you and take you seriously
You’re doing the lord’s work with this take ❤
❤️
You should do a deep dive on fantasy novel evolution, and even how traditional publishing is failing its audiences
I appreciated your brief tangent into Taylor Swift: it illustrated your point so well. The art and artists we love can be fabulous, but they aren’t above criticism. I think it’s fair to love a book or artist and yet remain a bit skeptical.
Wonderful video! You do an excellent job researching and presenting and I’m very engaged with your videos.
thank you ❤️
Great video essay, as always!
What always baffles me with romance, as a casual reader of the genre, is that in our society, the majority of humans do seek partnership…romantic partners to share lives with.
Like the basis of humanity but for some reasons (I agree with the ones you gave) it’s “stupid and vapid” and this comes from someone on the ace spectrum.
As if, for bad or for worse, we’re not always pushed into being in relationships in real life but when it’s in a romance novel, that’s somehow wrong and stupid and ONLY FOR WOMEN? Make it make sense.
You are great ,loved the video 🫶🏻
❤️✨
I have seen some people mentioning how there are other genres like fantasy and thriller and horror and that no one calls out these people for reading about toxic people or doubt their ability to separate fiction from reality. There is some truth to it. However, I have never seen a thriller reader make a list of the best bookish killers or a list of favourite dreamy killers (ironically, these lists are mostly only made by young romance readers). I have never seen a fantasy reader make list of top 10 hottest strategies to fight back your enemy nation that can be applied to real life. But its only the romance readers who specifically make a list of these hot alpha bookish boyfriends (every single of those guys are infinitely toxic and deserve to be jailed for all the shit they do the main girl). So, yes, most women are able to differentiate between fiction and reality but not all young girls are. And when you see large number of these best hottest book boyfriends and see the naive and even deranged comments seriously fawning about how much they want a Zade (a stalker and a murderer) in real life, you realise how serious this concern is. Sadly, some of them have also taken to harrassing real life people (ice-hockey players), make petitione to save a criminal who has committed heinous crimes and murdered women. I have also seen some comments about letting women enjoy what they want in including stories where they can turn their brain off (which is not even possible unless you are asleep or dead, but okay I'll take that) and it is fair. But just because you are not thinking hard while reading doesn't mean you can't think about what you read once you are done with that story or some other time. We as humans are constantly thinking, so this is not even something we have to force ourselves to do. So, I really don't get this excuse of reading book while turning off the brain. I am a woman who used to read Wattpad books during my teenage years and looked upto these badboys and playboys as the ideal boyfriend and it took me quite some time to understand how harmful and dangerous that kind of thinking was for myself. People can read whatever they want, given that they also take time to think critically about what they are reading. We all have those stories that we love but also know have a lot of vaild criticisms. I can still accept that these readers don't want to think critically about the stories they are consuming, which is again fair, since its their lives. But, what I do find utterly unacceptable is the way they all attack and bully other people who think critically.
4:50 "romance novels had men that treated the women like real people and also were very much in love with them" - shows Willoughby 👀
Some points:
Two words: Adult. Fiction.
Adult female readers are intelligent enough to differentiate between fiction and real life.
Other genres also have set tropes, not just romance.
If you’re after romance without s3x scenes, they have separated it into another sub-genre, and it’s called sweet romance.
wasting time on reading/watching someone's fictional relationships instead of doing it by yourself is what makes me hate it, probably the only genre combined with isekai that i hate. I dont think someone who is succeseful in life and has a partner they wanted will read romance, those who lack one and could not get will be obsessed, just like isekai, for losers that daydream of another life
uhh what a take
can only speak from my experience, i am certainly not obsessed with romances (though we should define “obsessed” here :) but i do enjoy them if they are written well and there are some out there that i absolutely adore ❤️
and love/relationship aspect of my life is maybe the only one that i have been 100% happy with for years
so idk 🤷🏻♀️
+ you are reading about someone’s life and relationships no matter which genre of books you end up picking up, no?
Oh you mean like losers who spread hate on the Internet because they're not happy with their real lives? 🤔
weak take that can be applied to every single fiction book that uses real-life as base for the story no matter the genre, therefore not a valid one. go read non-fiction and worry about looking like the loser you already are somewhere else.