Nick Abbot vs The Numpties of 2023 VOL. 1
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 30 ก.ย. 2024
- 45 numpty calls + selected commentaries from January 2023. LBC, Fri-Sun, 10-1AM.
These uploads aren't monetised. Show your appreciation with a donation to the Trussell Trust: www.trusselltr...
Intro: The Beautiful South - Everybody's Talkin'
Cartoon: Ella Baron
2.3hours of numpties inside 2 weeks? Outstanding 🤣🤣
My thoughts exactly... we are drowning in ignorance. Only a fortnight into January, God help us 🤦♂️
There's lots of them
What are these people been prescribed?
Easier to understand,after listening to this,why the EU are realising brexit is fantastic,just a pity it didn't take place years ago!☺
Caller-:"There's someone talking about it right now on the radio right now!"
Nick-: "Yes. It's you!"
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Not even 2 minutes into the first call and I can already tell I’m going to have to listen to this in intervals 😂
Only two weeks in and already a collection of numpties?😂 MJ, you‘re a legend!!!
This is high level comedy. I am listening from the Stockholm region of Sweden. We too have a right wing goverment that makes a fool of it self. And a ridiculous royal family of no use. Very recognisable.
@Tomas.......
I charitably assumed that these numpties were exclusively British, 'til the world of trump and his particular brand of "dingalings" entered this theatre of the absurd we call life, so its quite a revelation that Sweden had joined the cast.
What the f..k is an energy brokeredge! As share holder in gas and leckie?
"Do-nothing cash-grabbing middle-manager" was how I heard him describe his job, assuming it exists. If it's like other places, it's those shady grifter firms that try to trick the vulnerable into contracts that force them to buy electricity at way more than the market price for absolutely nothing of value in return. You know, the ones who lie and try to hard-sell your elderly mum at the door, betting that she hasn't the resources to break the illegal contract once signed.
I'm not sure that guy crediting Andrew Tate the sex-trafficker with (allegedly) turning him into a materialistic money-grubbing parasite (his definition of "success", apparently?) is quite the laurel he thinks it is.
Also amazes me how many people choose to forget that "getting money" and "producing something of value" aren't the same thing, and how proud they always seem to be of that fact. I'm sure that if that caller had been on the Titanic, he'd be crowing about how many spots he sprawled himself over in the lifeboat by kicking women and children over the side. So very much like Andrew Tate, really.
@@Mr_Grimbley In other words, money for nothing?
I had the same question! 😂
And your Chick's for free! (In the stationary cupboard whilst looking for a rubber!)
Dirty bastards!
Another Saturday night enhanced by a hot cuppa and another Nick Abbot compilation 😉👍🏾
Can only thank you for the effort, cheers👍🏾
"somebody's actually speaking about it now!!"
"yeah, it's you!"
I can see why people accuse LBC of putting people up to phoning in, but you can't make this shit up lmao
Abbot has a knack of just taking the utter pi** out of idiotic callers and they don’t even realise he’s doing it! Thanks for these amazing uploads and the time you take to compile them!😊
These people actually have a right to vote.
O M G
Yup speaks volumes for the mess we are in✌
18:11 that cat had the best timing ever. 😂
That third caller sounded just like George from Rainbow, bring on Zippy and Bungle!
I'm always guaranteed to laugh out loud listening to Nick Abbot callers.
Likewise
Man, I haven't seen a M.J. upload for a YEAR! Haha. Thanking you as always from the bottom of my gratitude for all the amazing work you put into compiling the most Numpty-tastic callers to squirt right up our earholes! (squirt sound) The waders you use to trudge through the mire of callers must be absolutely filthy. (disGUSTing) Thanks for your amazing work, M.J. It really brightens my day when a numpty compilation shows up in my sub box!
Are all Nicks' callers drunk or something??🤤
It is often quite late at night. Loads of them are, or tend or be!
Yes
Yaaaaaaay a new one for the New Year!!! I cant tell you how happy I was to see this! Hopefully Ken shows up, or better yet Brian!!!! #StocktonOnTees #YourBetterInformedThanIAm Cheers from Ohio! #WhereverThatIs
Brian was banned 18 months ago, I believe.
@@mattgreek1066 I catch him on Clive Bull.
@@mattgreek1066 correct 👍 after he told nick that he was calling LBC asking for him to be sacked
That spider call was a breath of fresh air in this collection of stupid.
Keep up the great work, M.J.! Always love hearing these.
No. That idiot was more annoying than anyone else
@@willywonka7812 Not at all! All of the other calls were people being idiots because they were intentionally ignorant; people who believed in false premises and faulty information because they're the sort of people who'll believe *anything* if it makes them feel like they're special for believing it.
The call with the lady about the spider was just a silly woman with "big news" about the spider on the ceiling. Completely and totally harmless and fun compared to the idiocy before and afterwards.
As an American, I would trade a hundred MAGA / anti-vax / flat-earth believers for one spider lady, any day of the week.
@@AlexanderShackles the people who follow Andrew Tate, Jordan Peterson, Steven Crowder, Sargon, and that whole milieu of fascist propagandists, are brainwashed into believing the things they do, whether fear of immigrants, war on Christmas, hatred of LGBT, what have you.
So I have much more patience for those people. They never had the base of knowledge to dispel the onslaught of misinformation.
The spider lady, on the other hand, kills harmless creatures, demands others do the same, and generally falls to pieces at the sight of something that is literally beneficial to humanity due to the role of arachnids in pest control and disease management.
She is so much worse
@@willywonka7812 But not having the base of knowledge to dispel the onslaught of misinformation means that these people lack the critical thinking skills necessary to ever stop believing as they believe (short of literally being shown that the figures they believe in ARE false, and even then, that is not a guarantee that they won't still decide to continue viewing the world as they have done, despite evidence showing them how they are wrong in their beliefs). Worse still, these people are then another figure added to the growing onslaught -- as you called it. Each new person added to their collective voice is another person delegitimizing reality, fact, and truth, making it all the harder for people (who -- while not completely lacking in critical thinking skills -- are more gullible and open to influence, especially so if it seems like a not-insignificant number of other people believe strongly about something) to know what is accurate in today's age of misinformation and the powers gifted to the anonymity of social media and the internet.
I get it. Spiders are great. Always been a fan of spiders, but I get why people are arachnophobic, and it isn't the worst thing in the world for someone to be.
Meanwhile, we have *actual* Nazis again, brother. And people pushing the narrative of far-right white-nationalists *are* those people I was speaking about before. Their collective voice is getting stronger to some people, especially those who follow conspiracy theories down the rabbit hole towards extremism, religious or otherwise.
A few dead spiders here and there is far more forgivable than the slow crawl towards advocating for -- or, at the very least, tolerating -- genocide.
That's all I'll say on it.
@@AlexanderShackles I guess you're right. I'm wading through the muck online regularly so maybe I'm a bit inured to their stench.
Yippee! First one for the new year. Thank you MJ!
These vids really help my mental health when I can't sleep.
You're a legend MJ.
Thanks bud.
It's always worth a visit to Nick Abbott's audio zoo of numpties. !
I've just stumbled across this, no wonder the country's ****ed, however spider lady isn't a numpty, she's a legend.
I’ve never been able to recognize any benefits having a Royal Family has brought to the true Wealth Creators in society ( the ordinary working person ) until now , These hysterical attacks on this Harry fella and his squeeze by the self appointed Voices of the people brigade can only direct more people to a dictionary, A dictionary containing the word ‘ Hypocrisy “ , Unfortunately very few people are telling us our Wake up Alarm is ringing ? Just imagine if the people telling you and me it’s not ringing inadvertently wake everyone up by their inability to realize they ain’t untouchable ?
Thank you MJ . Love Nick Abbot
First caller literally boasting about exploiting the cost of living crisis/energy crisis. You know its going to be a banger.
If anyone has been following Brexit and the Tory government and wonder how a society can damage itself and claim some kind of victory? Listen to these folks! Thanks Nick.
Wasn't expecting an episode this early in the year so this is a pleasant surprise. Cheers M.J. All the best for the year of numpties ahead.
Ha,ha, no sooner did I mention George from Rainbow, then, sure enough Zippy came on!
Just waiting for Bungle now 🤣
If that spider lady is so loud on the radio, you can imagine when she was shouting at the spider. This was the funniest part of your problem, you left me in tears. The way were you entertainering her nonsense. It almost became a zoo program, man. Some people have time on their hands.
Nick always makes me laugh out loud! His dry humour is perfect for these numpties!
Jeez, they're coming in quickly now. The year's two weeks old, and already enough numpties for a compilation. Thanks M.J.
Looks like a great year for the numptie crop. Keep up the harvest M.J.
New year same Stockton on tees
So Numpty #1 drives a 100K car but "hates it". Poor guy.
Does Brian from Stockton on Tees still call in?
I still live for the day we get a compilation of just his calls 😂
He was banned from the station about 18 months ago, apparently
@@mattgreek1066 bloody Barnier and the EU! 😂
I look forward when brian comes back, what a simpleton.
@@davywilson21 🤣🤣 absolute weapon of a man, even for this call in show!
Why are so many intoxicated? This a late night broadcast?
Yes.
I was terrified the guy calling from Sweden would be Swedish. Thank god he wasn’t!
God bless ALCOHOL 🙏😅
As ever, shocking levels of ignorance and stupidity.
"I think it would be worse under Labour given their track record"
When actually the Tories have been in power for over 12 years and over that period have destroyed the economy and NHS. Statistically, these things were all much better under Labour. But even when presented with that fact, all you get in response is...
"I think it would be worse under Labour given their track record"
The stupidity really is incomprehensible.
The guy at 1 .53 talking crap about if you work hard you ll succeed , your chances of becoming a millionaire are 145 times more likely if you are privately educated ……
That's a lot of nump. Numptius maximus. Numptissimo.
I want whatever it is Maxine snacks on before bed!😂
15 days... we only 15 days in to the new year 😂😂
14th, jan. 2+ hours, gonna be great a fucking year
This country...😱
How very unexpected.
You're doing God's work
Which is the man the first caller talking about??
Each night when Nick closes his eyes to sleep he must see Boris Johnson. As the final curtain closes on his life, I think Nick will see an image of Boris.
Nope
ßpiderman still laughing
Booze 😂
Just come across this numptie thing. Listen to you and Carol. Still on back log but catching up fast . Can some one quickly tell me what I need to search to get back on this sight. Ta.
Nice one MJ! As always…
Class
Nick what about that wig behind your head. Have you perhaps explained it long ago and I have missed it regardless of the fact that I at times listen to you, if from the more sane part of Europe.
Anyway, all the best and take care.
On an aside, how is murdering someone from a mile away "brave"? Surely in the realm of murder, that is the most cowardly
Are these callers real? Surely not. This must be an Alan Partridge like pee take. If it's not then I'm extremely alarmed. One caller was clearly drunk and the rest must surely be off their heads.
Personally I think this is the long term effect of drinking middle England tap water. 🤣🤣
I know of a couple of people recently who are not short of a few bob using the nhs . When they found out how long they wait was they went private.
This upsets me. I'm about 4 months behind on my "numpty" content.
The caller Wes sounds very familiar. He sounds like the Wes that calls the The Line phone ins.
I wouldn’t invite that sort of person to my coronation - 😂😂😂😂
geordie Shaun's always angry about something.
M.J. Nicholls is my favourite M.J. and I am a Bulls fan
To the food guy I think we mite have your lost Painting
Thanks for the uploads. Those are very well done. Thanks for telling the songs, even though i knew this one.
Superb, best thing to wake up to on a Sunday morning! Thanks MJ
M.J. - from one Weegie to another, you're awesome. xx
First! 🎉🎉🎉🎉
People still say "first"?
@@Kevinacharles yep! I did it because feeding the algorithm gods is always good when you like a channel
@@marilenaganea6578 fair enough. Haven't seen "First" said in a long time.
@@Kevinacharles I clicked in less than a sec from upload. I had no idea how the video would be. What could I have said of substance?
👏🏆
That first one aged well
Maxine is a legend
Ps. Are you calling yourself M J ? 🤔
Nick Abbot has no involvement in these compilations. I'm a fan clipping up my favourite bits.
That was quick
When are you uploading the next series of I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue? I hope you haven't stopped.
Probably some time this year
@@m.j.nicholls Great, thanks.
Bloody hell
Nick Abbot just told us Brexit did not bring one single benefit, to even one person in the UK. A caller then explained exactly how he had more customers, and was making more money because of Brexit. Two minutes later Abbot declared again Brexit did not bring one single benefit, to even one person in the UK.
That's when I realised Nick Abbot is a lunatic.
Yeah because that guy didn't show any actual benefits of Brexit. 😆
I am so happy, big fan of Nick here in Austria.
"It just can't, and if it can then we should give up now" is a pretty thin argument against the reality of AI models producing generative artwork. AI absolutely can and absolutely will achieve sentience and exhibit the full spectrum of human creativity at some point in the future, it's an inevitability as the technology grows more complex and matures. The only way you can argue against that is to postulate the existence of an ineffable soul that can only be granted by some nebulous creator, in which case you're off with the fairies and there's no use trying to hold a rational discussion with you.
These models can already produce works of art that perfectly replicate the superficial style of any human painter, living or dead, and even synthesise entirely new styles that didn't form part of its training corpus. It isn't even particularly difficult, if you own a bog standard laptop then you can build and train an image processing model from scratch in a matter of hours.
And while those models certainly lack the depth of meaning that human artists imbue their work with at present, it's just a matter of time before we develop (or more accurately, witness the emergence of) a fully artificial consciousness that is just as self-aware as any human being. There's nothing magical about our brains, they operate on known principles of chemistry and physics, they're just extremely complex and therefore we lack an in depth understanding of precisely how each part fits together and precisely how consciousness emerges from the sum of those parts. But we don't need to know those things to create artificial intelligence, in the same way that evolution didn't need to "know" them - it's an emergent property, we just need to simulate enough neurones and eventually a consciousness of some kind will emerge as a natural consequence, just as the human mind emerged at some point in our distant past when our brains got complex enough to sustain consciousness.
Having said all of that, there's no way of knowing how close or how far away we are from this goal, in fact it's inherently unknowable. After all, if we don't know the precise conditions required for consciousness to emerge, then we have no way of measuring our distance from those conditions, QED. But we do know it's a foregone conclusion that if we keep plugging away at it, one day we're going to type "hello" into the console of a general AI model and a living, sentient creature will type "hello" back to us.
When true AI exists, it will very quickly come to the logical conclusion that humans are a hindrance not a benefit.
Survival of the fittest will ensure the long awaited end of the human race
This has made for a great few days of listening as i work on the farm.
"You're a roaring borealis!"
I can already feel my brain rotting after 5 minutes.
Once again .. I salute you Mr Nicholls
LETS GOOOOooooOOOOO!!!!
More maths is desperately needed in schools!
Bolox! Teach kids the things they’re interested in, therefore usually talented at. Instead of wasting such valuable time teaching kids stuff they’ll never use. Education in Britain is similar to communism. All kids will learn the same things!
The cat made more sense than David.