1. Never complain about the price 2. Never refuse to tip 3. Never bring outside food and wine 4. Never treat waiters and staff as subordinates 5. Never interrogate the waiting staff 6. Never fail to communicate dietary restrictions carefully and early 7. Never do the service job for them 8. Never display bill antiques 9. Never impolite when airing our dislikes 10. Never ask for toothpick and remove food from our teeth
Hi, Vivienne…it’s Mary in Florida. Salmon from the Norwegian fjords! 😂😂😂 You had me literally laughing out loud! My husband is in the hotel business and he’s a Food & Beverage director. You’d be shocked at some of the things he’s dealt with. 🌺😘
We all need people who can help us rub off the hard edges and who honestly have our best interest in mind when they do it. Thanks for your help Vivienne. 🌹🌹🌹
I am so grateful that I have found your channel!! Although I am aware of many things you mention I still seek to make my manners and way of being, moving, speaking and behaving more lady-like and more feminine. Thank you so much for your impact❤️
What a wonderful video. This reminded me of a little story my mum told me. She comes from a village and her auntie took her to a fancy restaurant for the very first time when she was a little girl. When they brought the bowl, so she could wash her hands.. she drank that water. Bless her little heart.. Glad this video is here, so ladies can avoid embarrassing moments like this. It still warms my heart when I think about it :)
So refreshing! I think we have all had our off days, occasional bad manners when our pet peeves have been utterly irritated... but listening to your voice, your elocution, your poise and your grace is soothing to listen to.
I’m not splitting the bill equally when everyone else is ordering expensive drinks all night and I only ordered a Caesar salad and ice water. It’s happened to me once and I won’t ever let that happen again ! 😂
I went out for a family dinner for my 21st birthday a few years ago. I’d never been so embarrassed in my life at the way they all behaved, complaining loudly to each other that there was not enough food, waving food around on there forks. This experience is all that comes to mind now when someone mentions a 21st birthday, not a happy memory. Worst of all my best friend was at the dinner with us and it was her place of work. They were so disrespectful for the whole duration I’ve never been out for a meal with them again.
😔 I'm so sorry hun. I can imagine your embarrassment but I also find this story quite endearing and familiar, (in a good way) 🥰 families are precious. All unique and some more colorful than others. 🙏 praying you still felt loved on your 21st, it's such a blessing to be surrounded by family. (Even when they're UTTERLY embarrassing. 😩🤣😁) ✌❤🙏
That's horrific. I have two family members like that. Most people don't invite them. People have told them about their behavior. They don't care. So rude.
I am a British expat and I learned very early on that British table manners are very different to American. A lot of what American’s consider normal is considered rude by British standards. All these points are universal though! 🙂
@@brackitaclemons6793 Eating with your fork in your right hand and cutting your food with the fork instead of fork in left, knife in right. A lot of Americans put elbows on the table which is considered rude in good British company, and don’t put their knife and fork together on their plate to signify they’ve finished eating. There is also a lot of people at an American table all talking over each other at the same time, which is also considered rude by traditional British standards. Eating off each others plates and sharing food seems to also be fairly normal in America but and is rude in Britain. There are a lot of rules around hosting dinner guests as well that are different between both countries. In contrast, when I first moved to America I believe I was considered a little quiet, prim and stand-off-ish which is rude by American standards, where as I thought I was just being polite and courtious. It’s interesting to note the differences!
I'm agreeing with everything you are saying however when eating other people, not everyone orders the same thing in quantity. I had a situation where the person ordered twice the amount of food as everyone else but she insisted in splitting the bill when it wasn't fair for the rest of the group. I'm scenario's such as this one, I would rather getting my calculator and pay for what I have eaten to avoid drama 🙃 😅.
My husband and I treated our parents to a lovely French dinner years ago. My MIL complained about everything on the menu and loudly asked if we could take her to White Castle instead. We were mortified.
Good tips! However for #8 (never displaying bill antiques), I think that is situational which you explained. I am a very considerate person and I try not to do things I wouldn’t want done to me. If whoever you’re out with orders something more expensive than yours then I don’t think it should be an obligation or expectation to split the check evenly, unless there’s an agreement. People have budgets when they go out (at least I do), and it would suck to find myself in an uncomfortable situation. I think it all boils down to respect and consideration. I love your videos, they are always so enlightening!
About point 3: Even in these internet era, as a food allergic person, I tend to bring food with me always. Normally I eat after or before the meal, outside. I often ask about the food, and often times the food workers don't know nothing about the food they're serving. This also in middle and highend restaurants.... About not spliting the check: I don't drink, I should pay for others bottles/driks anyway? I don't think that is fare...
I have food allergies too and often all I can have they carry is a plain baked potato if they actually have that on the menu. That's not a real meal. And I can only drink water. I don't want to split someone else's meal when they are eating $60 worth of food and $30 worth of drinks.
As an elegant lady with food allergies, I absolutely will ask the staff about the ingredients. I'm not rude or condescending but I need to confirm everything before I order since I will be the one to deal with the physical ramifications. I'm always gracious and friendly and make the staff smile, to the point that they enjoy helping me. I also do as much research as I can before going to an establishment, this way I'm ready and things are seamless.
I put myself down for having to work in Hospitality for a while . ..but it helped sooo much ...now I can spot all the No No's in Restaurant Etiquette!😑😑😑 * I wouldn't recommend anyone to pay for the service charge * because it doesn't go to the servers ...but to cover Restaurant expenses !!! Please do your research! If you had an great service tip your waiter/ess with cash and kindly ask to remove the service charge .* it is not mandatory anyway only the Owner and the Government benefits from it👌
Well selected, and well presented. I would add a suggestion that elegance is compromised, when ... apart from a serious emergency ... a cell/smart phone, is brought forth during public dining.
It drives me crazy when people don’t know how to tip properly! I paid the tip on a bill (that wasn’t mine) to a distraught college student working their way through college. She served a large party of a basketball team, who stiffed her on the tip (service charge) ate hundreds of dollars worth of food and took up a lot of time in her section. (Another no-no, sitting too long in a server’s section, they are losing money while you are taking too long) Time she could have been turning those tables over. It was horrible, and they didn’t receive bad service, they were just ill mannered and cheap.
The road to 200k!!!. I cannot stand it when people keep nitpicking at food they ordered and cantankering with the waiter and manager. If you didn like you meal but the food Is perfectly fine, just concede the loss and learn It is not a dish for you !!!! Some people need to relax
Hello Vivian, I am hoping that you find it possible to do a follow-up video on dining etiquette relative to use of utensils in both a formal and informal setting. You would be amazed how many people lack the basic knowledge. Thank you in advance.
These are all wonderful tips. And, Tip #1 is my #1 pet peeve. When people do this, I get so embarrassed I want to run off and hide so as not to be part of the scene. :)
I think it would be interesting if you did " what would I do in that situation". For example: What would I do if my family members mock of me because I'm single. You could ask for and choose the best situations from the comments.
I was invited by a friend a in group party. I did not order anything, food or drink, I just drink water because I ate before leaving my place. When the bill came, the friend that invited me asking me to share for the food and drinks. We are 12 in the group and I’m the only person who did not order anything. It was a “huge” bill. I did not share any amount because of the obvious reason. I mentioned to her that during our Group conversation, she told us that she will pay everything and we just go that agreed place and not to worry🙁 After that incident all of the 11 persons she invited on that night never attended any party with her 😁
Excellent video. Especially about splitting the bill but I always say when with a gentleman an elegant woman never pays!!! Beauty and company is the payment
Tipping in my country is kind of seen as disrespectful. It is as if you’re looking down on the person serving you. As if they don’t get paid enough and are asking for your money to compensate that.👀 One time I told a shop owner to keep the change and he was so angry at me. So if I went to a country like the US, I’ll be sure to keep your advice in mind 😅
Lovely blouse - it looks lovely on you. Just a suggestion - if you were to move the flowers a few inches further over, we could see them fully. They look lovely and are a great touch
I remember one time that I went with people at the gym. I had mentioned that I was looking at the menu beforehand. They gave me a look that I cannot pay and cheap. Funny thing at the end of the dinner they are having difficulty paying for their bill. That is why , do your research.
New “Subbie” here. Thank you for all the info😊 I always end up paying most of time because no one is bringing out their wallets😂😂. Friends sometimes are full of free-loaders😂😂😂
Excellent video Vivienne!! What do you do when you are with people who want to split the bill according to what they each had? (I think that’s ridiculous too) what is a polite way of saying that you would rather split the bill evenly, without sounding disrespectful? xx Joanne
I would love to disagree .I do not think I should pay half when my friend took a bottle of wine coating 50USD plus expensive sea food while I had a simple Mac n Cheese and a 4 dollar glass of wine .Everyone should pay their own share .
Also some poeple would take advantage of other people .I have seen it .People ordering bottles of hennesey while others had normal alcohol yet expected to pay more .It is not okay
@@sakuraesther6309 I am referring to instances where there is not much difference in what is ordered, as Vivienne states, when there is significant extras, like caviar, supplements for extra seafood, expensive wine etc. these should be paid for by the individual.
1. Never complain about the price
2. Never refuse to tip
3. Never bring outside food and wine
4. Never treat waiters and staff as subordinates
5. Never interrogate the waiting staff
6. Never fail to communicate dietary restrictions carefully and early
7. Never do the service job for them
8. Never display bill antiques
9. Never impolite when airing our dislikes
10. Never ask for toothpick and remove food from our teeth
Thank you so much for this outline
Thank you for the outline
What if they mess up with the bill 💵? I will dispute that immediately
Thank you for taking the time to tell us this!
@@lalaheart76 🤣🤣
Hi, Vivienne…it’s Mary in Florida. Salmon from the Norwegian fjords! 😂😂😂 You had me literally laughing out loud! My husband is in the hotel business and he’s a Food & Beverage director. You’d be shocked at some of the things he’s dealt with. 🌺😘
We all need people who can help us rub off the hard edges and who honestly have our best interest in mind when they do it. Thanks for your help Vivienne. 🌹🌹🌹
I am so grateful that I have found your channel!! Although I am aware of many things you mention I still seek to make my manners and way of being, moving, speaking and behaving more lady-like and more feminine. Thank you so much for your impact❤️
What a wonderful video. This reminded me of a little story my mum told me.
She comes from a village and her auntie took her to a fancy restaurant for the very first time when she was a little girl. When they brought the bowl, so she could wash her hands.. she drank that water. Bless her little heart..
Glad this video is here, so ladies can avoid embarrassing moments like this. It still warms my heart when I think about it :)
😂😂this is funny and sad at the same time. She will never forget
😂😂
Am from Kenya and am very glad that have found this platform the message is so enlightening
So refreshing! I think we have all had our off days, occasional bad manners when our pet peeves have been utterly irritated... but listening to your voice, your elocution, your poise and your grace is soothing to listen to.
Tvsw
I’m not splitting the bill equally when everyone else is ordering expensive drinks all night and I only ordered a Caesar salad and ice water. It’s happened to me once and I won’t ever let that happen again ! 😂
Exactly.
I went out to eat with a group and the bill was almost $2,000. I ordered a $50 steak and one drink. I paid for what I ordered. 😂
Thank you Vivien.
Am learning alot I follow you from Zambia Lusaka Africa 🇿🇲🇿🇲.
Am definitely an elegant lady with these lessons.
I went out for a family dinner for my 21st birthday a few years ago. I’d never been so embarrassed in my life at the way they all behaved, complaining loudly to each other that there was not enough food, waving food around on there forks. This experience is all that comes to mind now when someone mentions a 21st birthday, not a happy memory. Worst of all my best friend was at the dinner with us and it was her place of work. They were so disrespectful for the whole duration I’ve never been out for a meal with them again.
😔 I'm so sorry hun.
I can imagine your embarrassment but I also find this story quite endearing and familiar, (in a good way) 🥰 families are precious. All unique and some more colorful than others. 🙏 praying you still felt loved on your 21st, it's such a blessing to be surrounded by family. (Even when they're UTTERLY embarrassing. 😩🤣😁)
✌❤🙏
That's horrific. I have two family members like that. Most people don't invite them. People have told them about their behavior. They don't care. So rude.
I'm so sorry this happened to you.
I am a British expat and I learned very early on that British table manners are very different to American. A lot of what American’s consider normal is considered rude by British standards. All these points are universal though! 🙂
I agreed. Most Americans are loud.☺️
Like what?
@@brackitaclemons6793 Eating with your fork in your right hand and cutting your food with the fork instead of fork in left, knife in right. A lot of Americans put elbows on the table which is considered rude in good British company, and don’t put their knife and fork together on their plate to signify they’ve finished eating. There is also a lot of people at an American table all talking over each other at the same time, which is also considered rude by traditional British standards. Eating off each others plates and sharing food seems to also be fairly normal in America but and is rude in Britain. There are a lot of rules around hosting dinner guests as well that are different between both countries.
In contrast, when I first moved to America I believe I was considered a little quiet, prim and stand-off-ish which is rude by American standards, where as I thought I was just being polite and courtious. It’s interesting to note the differences!
Dear Vivienne,
We are so thankthfull for your teaching!! We need this guidance!!
I'm agreeing with everything you are saying however when eating other people, not everyone orders the same thing in quantity. I had a situation where the person ordered twice the amount of food as everyone else but she insisted in splitting the bill when it wasn't fair for the rest of the group. I'm scenario's such as this one, I would rather getting my calculator and pay for what I have eaten to avoid drama 🙃 😅.
I love point 4. Treat everyone with respect.
My husband and I treated our parents to a lovely French dinner years ago. My MIL complained about everything on the menu and loudly asked if we could take her to White Castle instead. We were mortified.
Typical mil
I also don’t like when guest complain about the price. 😒
By the way your top is beautiful! 😍
Good tips! However for #8 (never displaying bill antiques), I think that is situational which you explained. I am a very considerate person and I try not to do things I wouldn’t want done to me. If whoever you’re out with orders something more expensive than yours then I don’t think it should be an obligation or expectation to split the check evenly, unless there’s an agreement. People have budgets when they go out (at least I do), and it would suck to find myself in an uncomfortable situation. I think it all boils down to respect and consideration.
I love your videos, they are always so enlightening!
About point 3: Even in these internet era, as a food allergic person, I tend to bring food with me always. Normally I eat after or before the meal, outside.
I often ask about the food, and often times the food workers don't know nothing about the food they're serving. This also in middle and highend restaurants....
About not spliting the check: I don't drink, I should pay for others bottles/driks anyway? I don't think that is fare...
I have food allergies too and often all I can have they carry is a plain baked potato if they actually have that on the menu. That's not a real meal. And I can only drink water. I don't want to split someone else's meal when they are eating $60 worth of food and $30 worth of drinks.
I LOVE THIS VIDEO! I don’t hear ANYONE else talking about this and approaching it the way you do. Love love love and very useful!
As an elegant lady with food allergies, I absolutely will ask the staff about the ingredients. I'm not rude or condescending but I need to confirm everything before I order since I will be the one to deal with the physical ramifications. I'm always gracious and friendly and make the staff smile, to the point that they enjoy helping me. I also do as much research as I can before going to an establishment, this way I'm ready and things are seamless.
I got in the habit of showering twice a day now instead of once and I love it , I'm slowly applying what I'm learning here and I love my results.😊😊
Me too!!
@@halcyondays8945 💙
Where is this video point?
You are a breath of very fresh air. Thank you so much.
The one of toothpick got me laughing.
Thanks for sharing beautiful,I enjoyed watching like always
I put myself down for having to work in Hospitality for a while . ..but it helped sooo much ...now I can spot all the No No's in Restaurant Etiquette!😑😑😑
* I wouldn't recommend anyone to pay for the service charge * because it doesn't go to the servers ...but to cover Restaurant expenses !!!
Please do your research! If you had an great service tip your waiter/ess with cash and kindly ask to remove the service charge .* it is not mandatory anyway only the Owner and the Government benefits from it👌
Great tips ♥️
I love your etiquette videos. Thanks for sharing. 👍🏼
Thanks elegant Vivy. I love the way you speak.
Thank you Viv, I enjoy everything you teach 🥰
Well selected, and well presented.
I would add a suggestion that elegance is compromised, when ... apart from a serious emergency ... a cell/smart phone, is brought forth during public dining.
I really like this information. I wish there was a video just like this for wait staff. I love your channel. ❤️
I really enjoy this channel thank you!
Thank you for another great video 📹.
Great tips.
Welldone Vivienne! Thank you for this
It drives me crazy when people don’t know how to tip properly! I paid the tip on a bill (that wasn’t mine) to a distraught college student working their way through college. She served a large party of a basketball team, who stiffed her on the tip (service charge) ate hundreds of dollars worth of food and took up a lot of time in her section. (Another no-no, sitting too long in a server’s section, they are losing money while you are taking too long) Time she could have been turning those tables over. It was horrible, and they didn’t receive bad service, they were just ill mannered and cheap.
You're so sweet. I've done this on dates. If my date doesn't tip I find the server and tip❤
So happy I found your channel.
I ❤️ your accent!!!!!!! This is the only reason why I subscribed. Please continue with your lovely voice!
I love the way you speak, I am not English and i am just learning hearing your accent and the elegant words you use :)
Thank you Mrs Vivienne...I've learnt so much from your videos...love you...
Thank you, Miss Vivienne 💜
The road to 200k!!!. I cannot stand it when people keep nitpicking at food they ordered and cantankering with the waiter and manager. If you didn like you meal but the food Is perfectly fine, just concede the loss and learn It is not a dish for you !!!! Some people need to relax
ĺl
ll
“You risk being served ice cubes” lol that was hilarious.
Say thank you with a smile to the server when s/he gives you your dish or pull your chair. Thank you is such an elegant expression
Hello Vivian, I am hoping that you find it possible to do a follow-up video on dining etiquette relative to use of utensils in both a formal and informal setting. You would be amazed how many people lack the basic knowledge. Thank you in advance.
These are all wonderful tips. And, Tip #1 is my #1 pet peeve. When people do this, I get so embarrassed I want to run off and hide so as not to be part of the scene. :)
You're super Vivian. Thanks 🙏 so much for these tips
You are so good at what you do .Pure talent a good teacher ,I am sure you can tell from how your chanel has grown .Pure Pure talent
Thank you so Soo much for all your video ! We really appreciate ! 💞💞💞💞😁😁
Wow! I love it. Thank you.
Love the quality of your videos ❤
I’ve learned a lot, thank you Vivienne ❤️🔥
thank you. Learn a lot today from your video.
Thanks for these great tips elegant lady 😊
I think it would be interesting if you did " what would I do in that situation". For example: What would I do if my family members mock of me because I'm single.
You could ask for and choose the best situations from the comments.
Love all your videos
🎉🎉thank you very good
Appreciate the tips Queen!
Bill antics! I love it!
The toothpick clip 😂. Yes, please don’t flick the food from your teeth in others plates 😂
Your channel is best❤
your Ghanaian I'm here for it 🙌. no wonder why you're stunning ❤
I love your vocabulary 😍
I enjoyed watching this, Thank you so much❤
Thanks Vivianne 🤍🌸🎀☀️👒
I took note of point number 7. Thank you
I was invited by a friend a in group party. I did not order anything, food or drink, I just drink water because I ate before leaving my place.
When the bill came, the friend that invited me asking me to share for the food and drinks. We are 12 in the group and I’m the only person who did not order anything. It was a “huge” bill.
I did not share any amount because of the obvious reason.
I mentioned to her that during our Group conversation, she told us that she will pay everything and we just go that agreed place and not to worry🙁
After that incident all of the 11 persons she invited on that night never attended any party with her 😁
Regarding the tipping tip: VERY TRUE. But to add to this, in Japan- you don’t tip. It’s deemed as rude/disrespectful.
Love this video I've watched is so many times ☺️❤️
Greatly appreciated enjoyed it
Excellent video. Especially about splitting the bill but I always say when with a gentleman an elegant woman never pays!!! Beauty and company is the payment
Whoever does the inviting pays
Tipping in my country is kind of seen as disrespectful. It is as if you’re looking down on the person serving you. As if they don’t get paid enough and are asking for your money to compensate that.👀 One time I told a shop owner to keep the change and he was so angry at me.
So if I went to a country like the US, I’ll be sure to keep your advice in mind 😅
Ahaa!... Thanks Vivian; am learning something.
" WOW SO EXCELLENT "
This was great!
Thank you 🙏🏽
Thanks for this.
Lovely blouse - it looks lovely on you. Just a suggestion - if you were to move the flowers a few inches further over, we could see them fully. They look lovely and are a great touch
Thank you for this video, very needed. I experienced seeing a lady taking her own hair and starting to floss right at the table 😮
This is indeed helpful to me. Thanks
Thank you Vivienne 🥰🥰 I love your top could you please kindly share the link? Thank you
Thank ❤you so much
I remember one time that I went with people at the gym. I had mentioned that I was looking at the menu beforehand. They gave me a look that I cannot pay and cheap. Funny thing at the end of the dinner they are having difficulty paying for their bill. That is why , do your research.
I like your video so so much
Lol Miss Vivian, I’m trying to imagine diabolical food 🤭.
Thank you so much
thank you so much darling❤❤❤❤
Thankyou Vivian for the wonderful insights. Very curious of your background, if you don’t mind sharing.
Thanks for this is so informative ✍️✍️
This came in so handy. Loved every bit of it, Vivienne. Thank you!❤️
I shared thank you Vivienne 🙏🙏🙏🙏💙💙💙💙💙
New “Subbie” here.
Thank you for all the info😊
I always end up paying most of time because no one is bringing out their wallets😂😂.
Friends sometimes are full of free-loaders😂😂😂
Excellent 👌🏿 This entire list is a summary of my dining pet hates🙈
❤thank you 🎉
All of these tips are common sense!
Make take is if everyone order roughly about same in price then split bill, if not separate bills
I like all your videos & I like your character. Generally I don’t subscribe that much. But u r so kind I’d like to raise my feminine energy like u
Excellent video Vivienne!! What do you do when you are with people who want to split the bill according to what they each had? (I think that’s ridiculous too) what is a polite way of saying that you would rather split the bill evenly, without sounding disrespectful? xx Joanne
I would love to disagree .I do not think I should pay half when my friend took a bottle of wine coating 50USD plus expensive sea food while I had a simple Mac n Cheese and a 4 dollar glass of wine .Everyone should pay their own share .
Also some poeple would take advantage of other people .I have seen it .People ordering bottles of hennesey while others had normal alcohol yet expected to pay more .It is not okay
@@sakuraesther6309 I am referring to instances where there is not much difference in what is ordered, as Vivienne states, when there is significant extras, like caviar, supplements for extra seafood, expensive wine etc. these should be paid for by the individual.
The toothpick rule made me laugh😆❤.
I like 'interrogating' part. Hahaha.. the toothpick bit.
Awww
Thank you Aunty Vivian
My name❤️
It would annoy me when the people I’m having dinner with complain about how expensive the food is.
Oh my goodness when you said complain about the price I was like YAAAASS!!!! I hate that!!!!!!
I know this information is mainly for women, but this lesson is really for men.😮