So many comments of people saying, “She can’t be a four. She’s not sad enough. No way would I ever be this extroverted in an interview.” It’s not really up to us to tell someone else what their truth is. That may be your truth, but it doesn’t have to be hers. I love the enneagram, but we are so much more than just stereotypes. MAYBE she isn’t a four and over time she’ll come to discover that, but it’s not for us to decide that for her. What a boring world it would be if we could categorize everyone into 9 neat boxes based off of personality traits alone. Sincerely, A self preservation 4 that doesn’t look like a 4.
i’m not even a self preservation four, i’m a sexual four, but i am extremely extroverted! (i’m also 100% sure i’m a four. no type describes me better by a long shot). i didn’t used to be, but since i’ve been developing myself and getting to know myself throughout the years, i realized i was repressing a very happy, outgoing person inside because of my childhood messaging. maybe most fours aren’t extroverted but maybe some are and just haven’t realized it yet.
I am a 4w3, and am very high energy when around other people. People typically classify me as an extrovert b/c I am "bubbly," even though social situations tire me. I feel very much a separation of my personal expression in relationships with people who I classify as those who 'understand" me vs. those who don't-- like I am lower energy, much more authentic and more classic "melodramatic type 4" with close friends. I never even knew that it was a common 4 experience to feel isolated within their own families- wow! I feel so seen and understood... loved this video!
It's so refreshing to see an SP4 on a video that is bubbly like me. I've had such a hard time typing myself. I get 6, 7, 9, 1, 2, 3 and 4 all the time, and inconsistently. 8 and 5 are almost non-existent. Everything online about the 4 makes them sound like they are always depressed and melancholy, and want to bring others down to their level of misery in order for them to feel understood, and stuff like that. Yet I have always been "seen" as the bubbly optimist that is warm and inviting, albeit I'm very expressive and dramatic and have been told too many times I should be an actor. Yet, I have always felt misunderstood, because I feel like I am always "suffering in silence," trying to keep buried and hidden all the pain I feel for all the faults I see I myself. I do struggle with envy and shame, I feel those on a daily basis, but few people would even see that in the way I present myself. Then as I start to reveal more layers to myself people are always surprised at how much depth I have. Like Miranda, the best friends I've held onto over the years are the ones that know the true depths and pains of me and have stood by my side and loved me regardless. That desire to be understood and loved despite your faults is so strong in the fours. That doesn't mean we can't he happy, extroverted, bubbly people, as an SP4, we just experience those deep emotions in silence until we feel safe enough to open up about them. I love watching slice of life shows, comedies, romances and such, but I also love shows with depth and hardship that allow me to feel my emotions freely and deeply. I've never fully related to the 7 or 9, even though I think they are the other two parts of my tritype. I'm also an ENFP, so I am naturally more extroverted and optimistic for a 4. I think my full type is 4w3, 7w6, 9w1 SP. Unsure which of SO or SX are next in my stacking. Still figuring myself out. So many layers to peel away! Thanks for this video. It helped a lot!
Yes! Love this! Fours are awesome and we need to stop stereotyping them to be "one" way. They are complex and like you said, they have SO MANY LAYERS! I really appreciate your view on the sunny type 4. Thank you!
Oh my word. Thank you for this interview! I so resonate with all the cores of a 4 but have felt I am too "cheerful" or "bubbly" and many think I should be a 7. Seeing that this is possible as a 4, brings such a release of pressure off my soul! 💜💜
Hey everyone, I don’t think we should assume her enneagram type. Since we don’t know her that well, we shouldn’t really say much. So let’s be more respectful towards one another
I love her personality! I'm a 4 as well, I am also an INFP. I just wanted to say I think it is interesting how she looks up with her eyes quite a bit while talking...I do this all the time as well, and it is said to be an "Ne" thing...the "Ne eyes". I feel like I have a lot in common with her. This video makes a lot of sense and is very helpful because it confirms that not all type 4's are sad all the time, lol...Most people who know me would actually probably use the word "sunny" to describe me. One of the enneagram tests I once took mistyped me as a 7 as well, which is kind of interesting. And then the explanation of the "Self-preservation 4" in this video helped me understand my type a lot more because now I can see that 's the kind of type 4 I am too. Great video!
Wait oh my gosh! I’ve been trying to type myself for such a long time and kept changing what I thought my number was. People usually guess I’m a 7, but it never really felt right. I’m super outgoing and bubbly, but hearing Hillary explain the self-preservation 4 makes COMPLETE sense. I’m shook.
Absolutely loved it!! I am sp/sx 4w5, but I'm putting a lot of effort right now into developing my w3. Needless to say, it was SO exciting to see this personal goal brought to life in a person. I absolutely dig her energy, drive, and maturity at 19. And I am so grateful for this channel that always highlights the beauty in all types and our unique potential rather than faults and unhealth. Bit Thank You, ladies!
I DEFINITELY relate to her as a self-pres. But everything else that I've heard about self-pres is not me as much. But this girl and I could be twins!! I've never heard anyone describe themselves as much as her. Wow....!
One reason I loved acting in the theater was that it gives us a license to inhabit the **most** intense, profound emotions, and to do it out loud in public. All emotions are fine there--love and joy, but also rage, jealousy, terror.... Acting in classical plays made me feel like I was really living the way nature intended me to (as a 4w5).
I am pretty sure I am the self-preservation 4w5. I am not quite as bubbly as this young woman, but I present as friendly, 'sweet', engaged, but sometimes after making a first impression it's hard to maintain that image. To me there's a forced quality to being this way, an over agreeableness, cheerful rather than happy, and sometimes people have said my eyes don't match my smile. You don't really expect to be liked so you try to win people over one at a time by being extra-nice. I tend to work at being very understanding and accepting of each friend so they each may feel I'm their best friend.
@@enneagramandcoaching I have been reading the Journals of Sylvia Plath and see how hard she was trying to be cheerful, witty, entertaining, to wear that mask as a necessary cover.
This is me to a T! Thanks for this enlightening video! I almost feel bi-polar because I'm energetic and happy on the outside and still thinking I'm broken on the inside! Its great to know I'm not!
I think its true that our MBTI can change our outward appearance so that E types can look different. Its something that is not really taken into account most of the time.
It took me a long time to realize I was a 4 because so many definitions talk about 4s being so melancholy. I had the image of Sadness from the movie Inside Out. Once I learned about the Self preservation 4 it all made so much sense! I am also an ISFP and that Fi really embodies the 4. I pull easily from both of my wings, but at my core I would say I’m 4w3, just in my older years now I’m tapping into that 5 more often. Thanks for the great video!
I could SO relate to this. I am definitely a SP four. The one thing I didn't relate with was making my dreams a reality because of self-doubt. I always said if I had a cheerleader who believed in me I could probably do it. So that was interesting that she said when her mom encouraged her that is what made her pursue it. I feel like I could use a 2 in my life 🤣. I could write so much more on how many points were made that I could relate to. Thank you for these videos!
Finding out the subtypes helped me tremendously understand that I’m a 4! Self preservation “sunny” 4 here too ✌🏻✨ 4w3 I’m obsessed with performing, music, dance, and theatre! It’s the field of work I’ve been in since pretty much the beginning of my life. I struggled at first to realize I’m a 4 because they’re always described like Eeyore and gloomy! My best friend thought she was a 7 and thought I would be a 7 as well, but she is a 9 and I am a 4 💘 loved getting to watch this video and find someone I relate with!
I’m also a 4 in a committed relationship with a 2 (going on 5 years 🥰). Kinda wonder who other 4’s have found partners with? Not sure if enneagram personalities play any part of who we are attracted to and make deep connections with but it would be interesting to find out!
Ahhhh! My best friend is also a 9! Some thought I was a 7, but I am definitely a 4! I relate to her SO much, literally EVERYTHING she says!!!! It’s crazy!!!
I have been struggling with if I am a 4 or a 7 for awhile. I am ENFP Myers Briggs type and very much bubbly like Miranda. When I am not around people is when I have the deep thoughts and emotions. I continue to score as a 4 and relate greatly and this has helped me get some clarity of knowing I can be happy and bubbly AND a 4!
Wow! This really helped me. I'm a 4. When I first got this typing after taking a test, I cried. I saw all the things about a 4 and thought, "I'm a terrible person." I knew it was true. I guess maybe I cried too because I felt understood. After reading more about the other types and watching funny videos about the types being very generalized, I thought maybe I'm actually a 7. I even wanted so badly to be a 7. I even do 7 type things. At the end of the day, I know I'm a 4 because I've never felt the need to suppress my emotions. One way or another, I've dealt with them and tried to figure them out. I'd be super interested in learning about subtypes. I related a lot with the girl you interviewed because I've felt more energetic and come off as a 7.
Thanks for the video. I test as a 2 on the enneagram but through research, it’s clear that I’m also a 4W3 Sp. I think I test 2 because I’m an unhealthy 4 which gravitates in that direction under stress. My 3 wing is strong as I’m very goal driven, especially with my career. However as you said, it’s the core traits and fears that make me a 4. People often say I’m a positive person even though I don’t feel like I am. I simply choose to radiate warmth in my social circles because why make someone’s life miserable. I’ve always found it hard to be me while trying to fit the mold of society. I feel great when I feel like I belong in a group but so sad when I feel rejection. Anyway thanks again for this!
Yoooo I identify so much with her!!! Esp having to keep my quirkiness in and reeling parts of myself back based on who im around. My friend thought I was a 7 and I thought I was a 3 but omg I am def a 4 w 3!!
I'm very confused, though. What I'm hearing in other places is self-pres care more about, say, the aesthetics of the house, the house being clean, "where's the food?", "Is it a little too hot in here?", personal safety, things like that. Is that also self-pres? Or is it just a difference of opinions?
There are 2 different takes on this. Some teach that the instincts are more independent or in addition to the E type. Others like Beatrice Chestnut teach that the instinct interacts with the passion of the type to create a subtype. To me it seems like both should apply. Either way though the instincts are more subconscious than the the E type and have more of an influence than the type itself so it only makes sense that our "preferred instinct" would flavor the type. I would be interested in seeing if this girl relates to the self pres instinct in its pure form.
This is very helpful. I had never heard of a "sunny" 4 before but I think it really fits me, and it is why I've struggled to find my type up until now! I didn't relate as much to the stereotypes of 4 but I see a ton of similarities between myself and Hilary here. I wonder if she is an ENFP like me too in Myers Briggs- perhaps that is a common combination for "sunny" 4.
My tritype is 4-7-9, when I’m happy I’m like her, funny, positive, enthusiastic, like a 7, but often I get stocked on my negative emotions and melancholy.
I think this is a major issue in the community. I am a 4, well read up on the type, and I video chat regularly with other 4s I've met online and this girl is not one. She's either a 2 or a 9, something that stuck out to me was the "I don't want to be a burden" which is very 9, but could also be 2 as they prefer to be the giver (she also noted her role as the sort of "mother" in some friendships - very 2). Self-pres 4s are still 4s, they just aren't as openly suffering the way the other subtypes are. You seem like a 7 tho, although suspected that already with the image for the video, very sweet and cheerful. Have you read the various triads? Type 4 is not just a heart type, but a withdrawn, reactive, and frustration type. This is what gives 4s a, to some others, "negative outlook" vibe.
I totally agree. I'm a 4w5 SP/SX ENFP. I can seem "sunny" sometimes but definitely most people who have known me would not describe me that way. My spirituality is what gives me a positive outlook, but then I like to protect that and not splash everything out into the world. I'm very much a homebody...don't like to place demands on others or have demands placed on me. Like to be in charge of my own time, have space to feel my feelings but I don't need to contact people to tell them about everything...I just journal, make art, and talk to my therapist. I don't really have any close friends, I've never been part of a friend group - at least not since I was 12. I mean NEVER feeling I even remotely belonged on this planet AT ALL until doing even deeper intensive healing work over the past 3 years. I still am quite open about whatever I'm struggling with to pretty much anyone, but I've finally learned (now in my mid-30s, lol) that it's not always the best thing to immediately open up about problems, because that becomes how others define you, which is limiting and provokes pity or annoyance from others. I'm definitely becoming a much more "positive" 4 now, but that is through integration to 1 - becoming more disciplined and focused on my goals, not through being a scattered, perky 7ish person (I'm scattered enough as an ENFP 4). I can't maintain that level of sunny-ness very long. Also, I think some SP 4s can get more rigid with our boundaries than other 4s too, especially as we integrate to 1. I only have so much energy and time in a day and I only invite things into my life that are life-affirming now, nothing that creates lower vibrational states in myself. I can seem harsh in that self-protection and need to take care of myself before moving forward. Really I think if anything, we're pretty 1ish actually.
I don't think it's any of our places to question another person's identity if they haven't asked for feedback, or be gatekeepers of our type. There are multiple sp 4's out there who relate to not wanting to be a burden and suffering in silence until we get to the breaking point. Everyone's trauma WILL manifest differently, even among the core types. The 3 is strong with this one, and I would say sp 4w3 looks VERY different from sp 4w5 (also we do not know what her full stack is, which changes the flavor). Let's not forget that there's also MBTI type, energy type ... SO many other factors. Her experience doesn't minimize or invalidate YOUR experience, or anyone else's.
@@Nerdy-By-Nature Thank you for that input. I'm a lot like the four in the video, and some of these comments have been very hurtful and ignorant. You helped me feel better again.
@@karissahammond4587 so happy that my comment helped 🤗 no one else can define YOU. You know who you are, you know what resonates with your soul. Enneagram is a system where you self identify, which is a beautiful thing. If you want more wonderful 4/SP 4 info I highly recommend the Chestnut Paes podcast (by the author of The Complete Enneagram). Very accurate info, and supportive of the PERSONAL journey. Sending so much positive energy for your self discovery 💕✨
Oh wow I really really related to this video. When she said “When someone is not willing to past behind shallow it’s hard for me to truly connect with them” I felt like those were the words I was searching for a few time from now to express something I have though about before. It’s funny when I first learned the basics of enneagram I low key wanted to be a 4, but every article about them always touched on the melancholically aspect of them which I really don’t relate to and so i leaned into being a 7, a type which I have grown to completely love too. This video though it took out that sadness stereotype of the 4 and that does make sense to what I felt. Really love to have found a channel that frees the theory from stereotypes, I’ll continue to look into your 7 and 4 videos to completely make up my mind, thanks for taking your time helping others
Seems like a 2 integrated towards 4... she seems like an image type Enfj 2w3 most likely .. even a 7 is a possibility.. very empathetic but way too extroverted .. I don’t see a 5 wing being attached to her at all. I’m a 4 with both heavy 3 and 5 wings based on the day and I could never get my voice that loud for an interview ... I’m also Sp/Sx.. Sp I’ve read is bubbly .. but not that bubbly. I am very sweet towards people and can be bubbly but it’s very short lived and not very loud it’s more cheerful and wanting to give a good first impression.. if she was a 4 she’d have a slightly dazed and melancholic deep though feeling behind the eyes, I know 4s would take time to answer questions in their own way to give perspective. Like I can be talkative and bubbly with people but my voice does not get loud or anything and I’m not very agreeable with everything I like to discuss my side. I resonate deeply with 4sp description but she just seems like an empath and a lot of empathy resonate with the deep feelings of 4s. I’d say a 2w3 most likely. 4s go deeper. On my 4w3 days I’m able to get extroverted and discuss ideas as well as look unique and give perspective others have not thought of. I never get surface level or enjoy it. As a 4sp I get very ecstatic and happy but not ever too too bubbly, but anyway just giving my 2 cents! I love your videos ma’am ~
I totally can see what you are saying. These types that are the "countertype" can be tricky to see them as the type they most relate too. I will say, a two did not come up in her top three, not that that matters a ton, but when I went over the Core's of all the types she right away felt like the type 4 helped her understand herself and she related most to it. She is 19, this might play a part, I've known her since she was little and it's been fun to see her start to understand herself and accept who she is. She's always felt different from other people in her life. I know Ian Morgan Cron, Author of The Road Back to You, thought he was a 7 for over a year before realizing that he actually is a 4. You have a lot of great Enneagram wisdom! Love other people's point's of view. I'm always learning. Thank you for sharing.
Enneagram types present differently with different MBTI types as well. I know other 5's that are quite different from myself, due to their MBTI being quite different. Well it's pretty obvious she's not a w5... so I guessed w3 by default.
This is very true. Each type has a coutertype. One that doesn't look at all like the others. And then you add MBTI and so many other factors and you can get a type like Miranda. Thanks for sharing your wisdom! I always appreciate it!
She reminds of myself...maybe I'm a enneagram 4 self pres. I really can't figure it out. I come off like a 7 to most people all i do is sit in my feelings (supposedly unlike 7s). I always have to figure why I feel the way I feel in order to take action (or not take action). I'm only half way through tho. But this is the closest I've ever felt out of all of these videos. Enneagram is so hard for me to pin down.
When I first took the test, I got 4 as my highest score, followed closely by 6, and I actually can't believe that I'm a 4, till I watch this, like I mostly relate to her as in the core fears and some basic traits she has (eg : feels not belong or fit in anywhere, the way she opens up to people). Also when you described characteristics of a 4w5 (which is what I get from the test). Eventhough there's still a bit of doubt in me that I might be another type. Also, I'm also struggling to find out my subtype since I had all three in me taking turns in events of my life. Can this actually happen?
4w5, but earlier in life was more of a 4w3....I have all 3 subtypes. With different people and their energy it brings out each of these subtypes with me
The Enneagram World does not call anyone 'a sunny type 4'. This is just Hilary McCaskey's notion. The questions are totally leading ones, and being a teenager, she agrees. There's no way she's a 4.
Actually the Inventor of the enneagram Naranjo was the first to use the term sunny 4, to describe SP 4s. If you search on google there should be some stuff from him that comes up, Including and old lecture on TH-cam from the 90s
Yikes, so many unhealthy 4’s gatekeeping and getting triggered in these comments because their elitism and uniqueness feels threatened! Stop being so cliche, guys! -another 4
Maybe wrong place to ask but... I'm a 4w5 and I think I'm a Sp dom, but I don't really put myself in tough situations or challenge myself. I wouldn't say I totally run from them, but I also wouldn't say I put myself in them. The rest about Sp 4 and 4 in general is actually accurate for me, but not that part. I suffer a bit from anxiety too. Could it be due to that (and maybe the w5)? Thank u 😊
I would never guess a 4. Maybe she's an enfp or enfj is coming thru ? I'm an infj 4w3 and I haven't figured my variant yet, but I am friendly but this is just so EXTRAVERTED. lol.
Please mam, I am an ENTP 8w7. I am confused between 8w7 vs 7w8. But I am sure I have a strong 8. Can you give some practical difference between them :)
Sevens think before they do something and Eights do before they think about it. An eight might be more of a workaholic and a seven might be more into experiences. But your Core TYPE comes down to the core fear, core desire, core weakness and core longing...those are very different between the 7 and 8. So once you land on your core type then look at the wings of that type. Hope this helps!
oh man I wish you could chat me. I have so many bits of them all but I Tested as a 4. This gal is very much like me. I am sunny most of the time. But man I can get snappy when frustrated. I also feel sad a lot, but so bubbly like this with others. haha
I think we should stop talking abour the 9 eneatypes and instead talk about the 54 eneatypes, because the subtype and the wing can (and normally do) change drastically the eneatypes. I totally see you as a 4w3 self-preservation! its very different from the 4w5 self-preservation for example (thats my type) and the 4w3 sexual (a friend of mine). Nice video :)
I thought I was a 7 or a 2 when I first read about the enneagram! But I'm 100% a four! I really like the idea of a "sunny type" 4, I think thats what I am but I'd love to know more about what that means!
I felt cringe throughout this video, she really doesn’t seem like a 4 and I’m stuck now wondering if it’s actually possible that she might just be one or not. Too much laughter and smiles, expressive actions and facial reactions. Of course she could be an INFJ 4 but she gives off a sensing vibe to me, don’t ask me why. Being bookish or been typed by someone professional means nothing to me, anyone can answer those questions you dished out despite not being a four and I’m speaking objectively. Nothing else from her gave me the impression that she’s one at all and answers were rather vague as well. On the other hand I think I’m a self pres 4 and my understanding of this subtype is that it has a contained energy, you feel that there’s some heaviness to me but yet I don’t show anything on my face, it’s all internal. Even my anxiety can’t be seen on the outside despite having great amounts of it. I kid around and laugh more than I smile, I don’t really talk about my inner struggles I prefer to hear yours instead. A long suffering SP dom is a more toned down version of Social subtype, I try to move away from my own emotions, I prefer to feel neutral than to feel sadness or an overdose of happiness. I enjoy melancholy and I like heavy stuff but I feel like there are times for that, I just can’t be in suffering mode 24/7. Not forgetting that however sunny a 4 is, he/she will still struggle with very volatile and intense emotions, to the extent that people feel uncomfortable around me sometimes. I feel like she can’t explain in depth why and how deep she feels about her emotions, I don’t show my negative side to others but when asked about my feelings you can bet that it won’t just be a one or two liner. I like to make the atmosphere lighter, but her energy feels like a totally different type altogether. The 4 is a suffering type, enduring, displaying suffering and making others suffer, so I really feel that negativity and heaviness should accompany this type because it has been living in pain all this while, how happy can one be when your drug is something that you love but kills you internally at the same time? I can only speak for turbulent types because I’ve yet to meet assertive type fours. Then again she might just be a 4w3, and I’m looking from a wing 5 perspective. But then again we see Lana Del Rey, a 4w3 but still very melancholic with toned down dreamy energy. Jeffree star, 3w4 but still none of that burning bright neon energy. I’ve heard about the sunny 7 four but I feel like type 1 is more me than 3 or 7. But this is the first time I’ve seen a “seven-ish 4”, I could be wrong about my judgements but it’s just a feeling don’t kill me.
@@zaptuno9148 Loving emotion is not 4. 4 is *structurally* not inclusive of the sunny side of the emootional wheel -- it's a Frustration type (Types 1, 4, 7), a Reactive type (Types 4, 6, 8), and an image type (2, 3, 4) invested in making clear their disagreement with the World and people. 4s have a narrow set of emotions that they associate themselves with -- this is alluded to if you look at the enneagram symbol itself. The 4 Point on the symbol is sharp ('frustrated, reactive'), narrow (hyper-specific), and has a downward/Underworld ('negative') thrust. 4 is in varying states of disgust, contempt, disappointment, reactive frustration...as opposed to embracing "all their emotions." Watch some interviews with actual 4s: Prince, Bob Dylan, Morrissey.
@@dfgray44 All those guys (whom we didn’t know personally) probably were happy at times. Their public images were far more stormy, but real humans are more nuanced than any PR image. Plus, some folks can experience various moments of sadness, frustration, and alienation, all in a day, and just kind of feel fine afterward and still see themselves as basically happy. It seems to be baked into the 4s moody nature to not see that kind of emotional mini-coaster as unusual or a sign of depression.
The temperament of the sp 4 may be sunnier THAN other fours not LIKE stereotypical 7s or 2s. I doubt she is a 4 but if she wants to lie to herself that's her choice.
dude, that’s so rude. i relate to her and i’m a four. you don’t know what goes on inside of her. i have experienced so much improvement in my life since i realized my patterns being a four. so, in typical four fashion i will tell you that you don’t know us and don’t get to type us, thank you.
@@SparklesNJazz you are being rude for trying to censor my opinion, it's my experience and I've haven't read anything like this in Naranjo, Helen Palmer or in Riso and Hudson, its just a badly explained Chestnut sub-subtype. Also she never get deep in her wound, just shallow stereotypes and feel goodsie shit
I’m definitely a 4 (balanced wings, INFP-T) and I’m not miserable. Not sure people would call me sunny, but I’m definitely not miserable (at least not that often).
except you can be a well developed, well balanced four and NOT be miserable. all types have different levels of healthiness. she seems like a healthy four.
This person is absolutely not a 4. The "countertype" of self-pres "sunny 4" is a bizarre extrapolation of Naranjo's original self-preservation 4 which he called "reckless/dauntless", the idea being that self-pres 4 "suffers in silence" and puts themselves in physical and financial risk in pursuing their emotional whims. This morphed over time to account for mistyped 9s who saw themselves as 4s. Both the sunny 4 and the "dauntless" 4 are wrong. A 4 is a type that is concerned with honing in on what aspects of their identity are uniquely their own - not a product of upbringing, culture, or even life experience. This is achieved by introspection and over-differentiating themselves from anything external - other people, the world, what's "common", etc. There is a strong element of rejecting everything in type 4, trying to hone in on what's singular and unique to one's identity. It's not "special" in a generic sense, there's a seeking of what is unique and meaning or significant because it is precious, rare, and authentically "one's own" rather than an accident of life/upbringing/culture. This "romantic" who focuses on deep, meaningful connections - that's 1) not a 4, and 2) could be any type. The person in the video does not demonstrate any of the "against-ness", the chronic frustration, or need to individuate and differentiate themselves that is characteristic of 4. Check out Big Hormone Enneagram's "Not a 4" episode or their episodes on countertypes.
Reading your comment i immediatly tought "another john luckovich fan" . In any domain it is very important to read different articles and books from different authors. And when you see that everybody thinks the same about something, but only one dude has a different opinion... well you get it. John actually i think is very toxic. Just bc he suffered more in life or idk what is with him, it doesnt mean every 4 needs to be exactly like him. He judges everybody... Is very important to let the people decide their own type. Also, type 4 it is the romantic, can find beauty in everything, and bc of this, they are very sensitive and deep. But beeing a frustration type, and having envy as vice, they always feel like something is missing. Some suffer less, others more. I'm a 4 and nothing like this girl. But we are much more than just 9 numbers...
@@Edinaa the only people who think i'm toxic are people who are mistyped and want to keep ignoring the distinctions i'm making. your counter isn't based on anything i'm actually saying and just a deflection to the appropriateness of what i'm saying - a major red flag for 9s, who commonly mistype as 4s, is tone policing instead of engaging with content. it's important to let people decide their own type, granted they have accurate information and are accurately applying it to themselves. i want to present accurate information. when so many people mistype, they alter how people understand and teach about a certain type. in this case, "4" is almost entirely described just as sensitive 9. " type 4 it is the romantic, can find beauty in everything, " why would a frustration type that emphasizes being unique find beauty in everything? isn't the melancholy associated with 4 rooted in the lack of seeing beauty in everything? an attachment type like 9 would see the beauty in everything because 9 has this connection to "Everything" in order to facilitate attachment. 4s aren't that romantic - again, that's 9. 4s are double-frustration, ie they reject. 9s seek attachment, so they idealize, romanticize, and often try to force themselves to see the positive in someone over and above what's actually real for that person. people think i make these distinctions to 'gatekeep' 4ness - no, if you don't actually see the type accurately, it renders the enneagram useless, instead of being something to help us see the prison we're in, it becomes a tool to reinforce self-fascination and identification.
John your 1st sentence says it all. ‘The only people who think I am toxic are those who are mistyped.’ That is deflection. ‘Disagree w me and you are mistyped!’ C’mon man. I actually agree with many of your assessments, but the ‘toxicity’ element comes into play when you invite yourself to tell others that they are wrong in their self-reflection. C’mon dude, this is not a science. And I also agree about the 4 and Romanticism part-I only felt that in terms of death. I mean, the person I felt closest to was Emily Dickinson, who is a 5w4. I actually think you have many good insights, but telling people they’re not the type they believe is invasive and shows a lack of boundary recognition. That is likely what Edina was referring to in her remark.
@@Jessicaunarex that's not deflection, that's just how the pattern pans out over and over. accusing me of being toxic isn't the same thing as disagreeing, but there are some types that feel the need to make disagreement into a moral wrong. i don't tell people they're mistyped, but i'll definitely point out where someone says "this is something type X would do" and it is clearly the tendency or trait of a different type. And yeah, on a video that's being used as a public exemplar, i will absolutely point out where those exemplars are not exemplars at all - this over-confident perpetuation of bad information is leading to people not able to make accurate distinctions, and thus, to people unable to engage with the enneagram beyond "i relate!" superficial nonsense. emily dickinson is a 9.
So many comments of people saying, “She can’t be a four. She’s not sad enough. No way would I ever be this extroverted in an interview.” It’s not really up to us to tell someone else what their truth is. That may be your truth, but it doesn’t have to be hers. I love the enneagram, but we are so much more than just stereotypes. MAYBE she isn’t a four and over time she’ll come to discover that, but it’s not for us to decide that for her. What a boring world it would be if we could categorize everyone into 9 neat boxes based off of personality traits alone.
Sincerely,
A self preservation 4 that doesn’t look like a 4.
Thank you
i’m not even a self preservation four, i’m a sexual four, but i am extremely extroverted! (i’m also 100% sure i’m a four. no type describes me better by a long shot). i didn’t used to be, but since i’ve been developing myself and getting to know myself throughout the years, i realized i was repressing a very happy, outgoing person inside because of my childhood messaging. maybe most fours aren’t extroverted but maybe some are and just haven’t realized it yet.
I am a 4w3, and am very high energy when around other people. People typically classify me as an extrovert b/c I am "bubbly," even though social situations tire me. I feel very much a separation of my personal expression in relationships with people who I classify as those who 'understand" me vs. those who don't-- like I am lower energy, much more authentic and more classic "melodramatic type 4" with close friends. I never even knew that it was a common 4 experience to feel isolated within their own families- wow! I feel so seen and understood... loved this video!
Love that this video helped you feel so seen and understood! Yay! Thank you for sharing! Loved reading this comment. ❤️
is it possible to be a quiet reserved 4, is that a 4w5
Same!!
“yOu DoNt KnOw Me” the anthem of a 4
😂😂😂😂
It's so refreshing to see an SP4 on a video that is bubbly like me. I've had such a hard time typing myself. I get 6, 7, 9, 1, 2, 3 and 4 all the time, and inconsistently. 8 and 5 are almost non-existent. Everything online about the 4 makes them sound like they are always depressed and melancholy, and want to bring others down to their level of misery in order for them to feel understood, and stuff like that. Yet I have always been "seen" as the bubbly optimist that is warm and inviting, albeit I'm very expressive and dramatic and have been told too many times I should be an actor. Yet, I have always felt misunderstood, because I feel like I am always "suffering in silence," trying to keep buried and hidden all the pain I feel for all the faults I see I myself. I do struggle with envy and shame, I feel those on a daily basis, but few people would even see that in the way I present myself. Then as I start to reveal more layers to myself people are always surprised at how much depth I have. Like Miranda, the best friends I've held onto over the years are the ones that know the true depths and pains of me and have stood by my side and loved me regardless. That desire to be understood and loved despite your faults is so strong in the fours. That doesn't mean we can't he happy, extroverted, bubbly people, as an SP4, we just experience those deep emotions in silence until we feel safe enough to open up about them. I love watching slice of life shows, comedies, romances and such, but I also love shows with depth and hardship that allow me to feel my emotions freely and deeply. I've never fully related to the 7 or 9, even though I think they are the other two parts of my tritype. I'm also an ENFP, so I am naturally more extroverted and optimistic for a 4. I think my full type is 4w3, 7w6, 9w1 SP. Unsure which of SO or SX are next in my stacking. Still figuring myself out. So many layers to peel away! Thanks for this video. It helped a lot!
Yes! Love this! Fours are awesome and we need to stop stereotyping them to be "one" way. They are complex and like you said, they have SO MANY LAYERS! I really appreciate your view on the sunny type 4. Thank you!
So many unhealthy 4s in the comment sections. 4s can be happy, stop dwelling in your negative thoughts and get outside more. Sincerely, a 4w5.
Thank you ^^^
YESSSS
This.
Oh my word. Thank you for this interview! I so resonate with all the cores of a 4 but have felt I am too "cheerful" or "bubbly" and many think I should be a 7. Seeing that this is possible as a 4, brings such a release of pressure off my soul! 💜💜
Yes!!! Love it!
same here!
This is SO me! “I don’t want to be a burden on anybody.” Bing bing bing bing!
Hey everyone, I don’t think we should assume her enneagram type. Since we don’t know her that well, we shouldn’t really say much. So let’s be more respectful towards one another
Literally was starting to doubt I was a four until I just watched this ❤️ SP is definitely one of my subtypes.
I love her personality! I'm a 4 as well, I am also an INFP. I just wanted to say I think it is interesting how she looks up with her eyes quite a bit while talking...I do this all the time as well, and it is said to be an "Ne" thing...the "Ne eyes". I feel like I have a lot in common with her. This video makes a lot of sense and is very helpful because it confirms that not all type 4's are sad all the time, lol...Most people who know me would actually probably use the word "sunny" to describe me. One of the enneagram tests I once took mistyped me as a 7 as well, which is kind of interesting.
And then the explanation of the "Self-preservation 4" in this video helped me understand my type a lot more because now I can see that 's the kind of type 4 I am too.
Great video!
Wait oh my gosh! I’ve been trying to type myself for such a long time and kept changing what I thought my number was. People usually guess I’m a 7, but it never really felt right. I’m super outgoing and bubbly, but hearing Hillary explain the self-preservation 4 makes COMPLETE sense. I’m shook.
I’m so happy this helped you!
This is me to a T! I’m definite a 4 in terms of motivations/fears, but a lot of my behaviors are like a 7
I'm appreciating these comments so much. I finally dont feel alone/ confused. No other enneagram feels the same honestly
Absolutely loved it!! I am sp/sx 4w5, but I'm putting a lot of effort right now into developing my w3. Needless to say, it was SO exciting to see this personal goal brought to life in a person. I absolutely dig her energy, drive, and maturity at 19. And I am so grateful for this channel that always highlights the beauty in all types and our unique potential rather than faults and unhealth. Bit Thank You, ladies!
I DEFINITELY relate to her as a self-pres. But everything else that I've heard about self-pres is not me as much. But this girl and I could be twins!! I've never heard anyone describe themselves as much as her. Wow....!
One reason I loved acting in the theater was that it gives us a license to inhabit the **most** intense, profound emotions, and to do it out loud in public. All emotions are fine there--love and joy, but also rage, jealousy, terror.... Acting in classical plays made me feel like I was really living the way nature intended me to (as a 4w5).
I am pretty sure I am the self-preservation 4w5. I am not quite as bubbly as this young woman, but I present as friendly, 'sweet', engaged, but sometimes after making a first impression it's hard to maintain that image. To me there's a forced quality to being this way, an over agreeableness, cheerful rather than happy, and sometimes people have said my eyes don't match my smile. You don't really expect to be liked so you try to win people over one at a time by being extra-nice. I tend to work at being very understanding and accepting of each friend so they each may feel I'm their best friend.
Love this. Thank you for sharing.
@@enneagramandcoaching I have been reading the Journals of Sylvia Plath and see how hard she was trying to be cheerful, witty, entertaining, to wear that mask as a necessary cover.
This is me to a T! Thanks for this enlightening video! I almost feel bi-polar because I'm energetic and happy on the outside and still thinking I'm broken on the inside! Its great to know I'm not!
the whole wanting to be "a good girl" thing really resonated with me, damn
Guys she is a 4. And probably an ENFJ.
See the whole video and study Enneagram properly, and you can tell she is not a 7, as some here assumed.
ENFP I think. She talks a lot about spontaneity.
As an ENFP, she seemed more like an ENFP to me, too much Ne for an ENFJ!
I think its true that our MBTI can change our outward appearance so that E types can look different. Its something that is not really taken into account most of the time.
It took me a long time to realize I was a 4 because so many definitions talk about 4s being so melancholy. I had the image of Sadness from the movie Inside Out. Once I learned about the Self preservation 4 it all made so much sense! I am also an ISFP and that Fi really embodies the 4. I pull easily from both of my wings, but at my core I would say I’m 4w3, just in my older years now I’m tapping into that 5 more often. Thanks for the great video!
So true! Every type has a counter type. And this is the 4s. I’m so glad you kept at it and landed on your type! All this made so much sense.
Oh my goodness I relate to almost everything said in this video, thank you!!!
Awesome!!!
I really enjoyed this video. I’m so excited that you’re going to be doing subtypes. 😁😁😁
❤️❤️❤️
I could SO relate to this. I am definitely a SP four. The one thing I didn't relate with was making my dreams a reality because of self-doubt. I always said if I had a cheerleader who believed in me I could probably do it. So that was interesting that she said when her mom encouraged her that is what made her pursue it. I feel like I could use a 2 in my life 🤣. I could write so much more on how many points were made that I could relate to. Thank you for these videos!
You are so welcome! Thanks for sharing your insight!
Wow. Me and this girl are so dang similar. Thank you so much! This really helps.
❤️❤️❤️
OMG! I figured out my type: A Sunny type 4! ENFJ. Thank you for the video!
Fantastic! I'm so happy this video helped you!
INFJ 4 here, hi type-sister =D
So so helpful! I’ve been so torn between 9 and 4, but this makes me feel like I could actually be a four
Finding out the subtypes helped me tremendously understand that I’m a 4! Self preservation “sunny” 4 here too ✌🏻✨ 4w3 I’m obsessed with performing, music, dance, and theatre! It’s the field of work I’ve been in since pretty much the beginning of my life. I struggled at first to realize I’m a 4 because they’re always described like Eeyore and gloomy! My best friend thought she was a 7 and thought I would be a 7 as well, but she is a 9 and I am a 4 💘 loved getting to watch this video and find someone I relate with!
(Also I change up my hair a lot with hair dye and cuts too)
I’m also a 4 in a committed relationship with a 2 (going on 5 years 🥰). Kinda wonder who other 4’s have found partners with? Not sure if enneagram personalities play any part of who we are attracted to and make deep connections with but it would be interesting to find out!
Ahhhh! My best friend is also a 9! Some thought I was a 7, but I am definitely a 4! I relate to her SO much, literally EVERYTHING she says!!!! It’s crazy!!!
I have been struggling with if I am a 4 or a 7 for awhile. I am ENFP Myers Briggs type and very much bubbly like Miranda. When I am not around people is when I have the deep thoughts and emotions. I continue to score as a 4 and relate greatly and this has helped me get some clarity of knowing I can be happy and bubbly AND a 4!
Wow! This really helped me. I'm a 4. When I first got this typing after taking a test, I cried. I saw all the things about a 4 and thought, "I'm a terrible person." I knew it was true. I guess maybe I cried too because I felt understood.
After reading more about the other types and watching funny videos about the types being very generalized, I thought maybe I'm actually a 7. I even wanted so badly to be a 7. I even do 7 type things. At the end of the day, I know I'm a 4 because I've never felt the need to suppress my emotions. One way or another, I've dealt with them and tried to figure them out. I'd be super interested in learning about subtypes. I related a lot with the girl you interviewed because I've felt more energetic and come off as a 7.
Thank you for sharing so authentically about your life. This will help so many. And, I love that you were able to relate to Miranda. ❤️
I am a 4w5 sp and I resonate a lot with her haha.
Thanks for the video. I test as a 2 on the enneagram but through research, it’s clear that I’m also a 4W3 Sp. I think I test 2 because I’m an unhealthy 4 which gravitates in that direction under stress. My 3 wing is strong as I’m very goal driven, especially with my career. However as you said, it’s the core traits and fears that make me a 4. People often say I’m a positive person even though I don’t feel like I am. I simply choose to radiate warmth in my social circles because why make someone’s life miserable. I’ve always found it hard to be me while trying to fit the mold of society. I feel great when I feel like I belong in a group but so sad when I feel rejection. Anyway thanks again for this!
just stumbled across this today & I feel so seen 😭😭
Love this!!! ❤❤❤
Great interview and great info about the countertype. Definitely me.
Thanks! 😃
Yoooo I identify so much with her!!! Esp having to keep my quirkiness in and reeling parts of myself back based on who im around. My friend thought I was a 7 and I thought I was a 3 but omg I am def a 4 w 3!!
So fun to learn more about the 4 (I think I have a kiddo who is).
Awesome! 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
I'm very confused, though. What I'm hearing in other places is self-pres care more about, say, the aesthetics of the house, the house being clean, "where's the food?", "Is it a little too hot in here?", personal safety, things like that. Is that also self-pres? Or is it just a difference of opinions?
Yes that’s true. Thats the basics of self preservation - we build on that. Then every type goes SP differently.
Hm......interesting. can you provide more info or references that talk about this particular fact?
There are 2 different takes on this. Some teach that the instincts are more independent or in addition to the E type. Others like Beatrice Chestnut teach that the instinct interacts with the passion of the type to create a subtype. To me it seems like both should apply. Either way though the instincts are more subconscious than the the E type and have more of an influence than the type itself so it only makes sense that our "preferred instinct" would flavor the type. I would be interested in seeing if this girl relates to the self pres instinct in its pure form.
This is very helpful. I had never heard of a "sunny" 4 before but I think it really fits me, and it is why I've struggled to find my type up until now! I didn't relate as much to the stereotypes of 4 but I see a ton of similarities between myself and Hilary here. I wonder if she is an ENFP like me too in Myers Briggs- perhaps that is a common combination for "sunny" 4.
My tritype is 4-7-9, when I’m happy I’m like her, funny, positive, enthusiastic, like a 7, but often I get stocked on my negative emotions and melancholy.
I think this is a major issue in the community.
I am a 4, well read up on the type, and I video chat regularly with other 4s I've met online and this girl is not one. She's either a 2 or a 9, something that stuck out to me was the "I don't want to be a burden" which is very 9, but could also be 2 as they prefer to be the giver (she also noted her role as the sort of "mother" in some friendships - very 2). Self-pres 4s are still 4s, they just aren't as openly suffering the way the other subtypes are.
You seem like a 7 tho, although suspected that already with the image for the video, very sweet and cheerful.
Have you read the various triads? Type 4 is not just a heart type, but a withdrawn, reactive, and frustration type. This is what gives 4s a, to some others, "negative outlook" vibe.
I totally agree. I'm a 4w5 SP/SX ENFP. I can seem "sunny" sometimes but definitely most people who have known me would not describe me that way. My spirituality is what gives me a positive outlook, but then I like to protect that and not splash everything out into the world. I'm very much a homebody...don't like to place demands on others or have demands placed on me. Like to be in charge of my own time, have space to feel my feelings but I don't need to contact people to tell them about everything...I just journal, make art, and talk to my therapist. I don't really have any close friends, I've never been part of a friend group - at least not since I was 12. I mean NEVER feeling I even remotely belonged on this planet AT ALL until doing even deeper intensive healing work over the past 3 years. I still am quite open about whatever I'm struggling with to pretty much anyone, but I've finally learned (now in my mid-30s, lol) that it's not always the best thing to immediately open up about problems, because that becomes how others define you, which is limiting and provokes pity or annoyance from others. I'm definitely becoming a much more "positive" 4 now, but that is through integration to 1 - becoming more disciplined and focused on my goals, not through being a scattered, perky 7ish person (I'm scattered enough as an ENFP 4). I can't maintain that level of sunny-ness very long. Also, I think some SP 4s can get more rigid with our boundaries than other 4s too, especially as we integrate to 1. I only have so much energy and time in a day and I only invite things into my life that are life-affirming now, nothing that creates lower vibrational states in myself. I can seem harsh in that self-protection and need to take care of myself before moving forward. Really I think if anything, we're pretty 1ish actually.
I don't think it's any of our places to question another person's identity if they haven't asked for feedback, or be gatekeepers of our type. There are multiple sp 4's out there who relate to not wanting to be a burden and suffering in silence until we get to the breaking point. Everyone's trauma WILL manifest differently, even among the core types. The 3 is strong with this one, and I would say sp 4w3 looks VERY different from sp 4w5 (also we do not know what her full stack is, which changes the flavor). Let's not forget that there's also MBTI type, energy type ... SO many other factors. Her experience doesn't minimize or invalidate YOUR experience, or anyone else's.
@@Nerdy-By-Nature Thank you for that input. I'm a lot like the four in the video, and some of these comments have been very hurtful and ignorant. You helped me feel better again.
@@karissahammond4587 so happy that my comment helped 🤗 no one else can define YOU. You know who you are, you know what resonates with your soul. Enneagram is a system where you self identify, which is a beautiful thing. If you want more wonderful 4/SP 4 info I highly recommend the Chestnut Paes podcast (by the author of The Complete Enneagram). Very accurate info, and supportive of the PERSONAL journey. Sending so much positive energy for your self discovery 💕✨
@@Nerdy-By-Nature Thank you!!! 💛💛💛
I just found the podcast on spotify. ^_^
Oh wow I really really related to this video. When she said “When someone is not willing to past behind shallow it’s hard for me to truly connect with them” I felt like those were the words I was searching for a few time from now to express something I have though about before. It’s funny when I first learned the basics of enneagram I low key wanted to be a 4, but every article about them always touched on the melancholically aspect of them which I really don’t relate to and so i leaned into being a 7, a type which I have grown to completely love too. This video though it took out that sadness stereotype of the 4 and that does make sense to what I felt. Really love to have found a channel that frees the theory from stereotypes, I’ll continue to look into your 7 and 4 videos to completely make up my mind, thanks for taking your time helping others
Seems like a 2 integrated towards 4... she seems like an image type Enfj 2w3 most likely .. even a 7 is a possibility.. very empathetic but way too extroverted .. I don’t see a 5 wing being attached to her at all. I’m a 4 with both heavy 3 and 5 wings based on the day and I could never get my voice that loud for an interview ... I’m also Sp/Sx.. Sp I’ve read is bubbly .. but not that bubbly. I am very sweet towards people and can be bubbly but it’s very short lived and not very loud it’s more cheerful and wanting to give a good first impression.. if she was a 4 she’d have a slightly dazed and melancholic deep though feeling behind the eyes, I know 4s would take time to answer questions in their own way to give perspective. Like I can be talkative and bubbly with people but my voice does not get loud or anything and I’m not very agreeable with everything I like to discuss my side. I resonate deeply with 4sp description but she just seems like an empath and a lot of empathy resonate with the deep feelings of 4s. I’d say a 2w3 most likely. 4s go deeper. On my 4w3 days I’m able to get extroverted and discuss ideas as well as look unique and give perspective others have not thought of. I never get surface level or enjoy it. As a 4sp I get very ecstatic and happy but not ever too too bubbly, but anyway just giving my 2 cents! I love your videos ma’am ~
I totally can see what you are saying. These types that are the "countertype" can be tricky to see them as the type they most relate too. I will say, a two did not come up in her top three, not that that matters a ton, but when I went over the Core's of all the types she right away felt like the type 4 helped her understand herself and she related most to it. She is 19, this might play a part, I've known her since she was little and it's been fun to see her start to understand herself and accept who she is. She's always felt different from other people in her life. I know Ian Morgan Cron, Author of The Road Back to You, thought he was a 7 for over a year before realizing that he actually is a 4.
You have a lot of great Enneagram wisdom! Love other people's point's of view. I'm always learning. Thank you for sharing.
She’s just an extroverted 4 who is 19. But she is definitely a 4.
Magick Oracle I am a type 4 -98%, but was 94% type 2 as well. So I feel very much like that⬆️
Enneagram types present differently with different MBTI types as well. I know other 5's that are quite different from myself, due to their MBTI being quite different. Well it's pretty obvious she's not a w5... so I guessed w3 by default.
This is very true. Each type has a coutertype. One that doesn't look at all like the others. And then you add MBTI and so many other factors and you can get a type like Miranda. Thanks for sharing your wisdom! I always appreciate it!
She reminds of myself...maybe I'm a enneagram 4 self pres. I really can't figure it out. I come off like a 7 to most people all i do is sit in my feelings (supposedly unlike 7s). I always have to figure why I feel the way I feel in order to take action (or not take action). I'm only half way through tho. But this is the closest I've ever felt out of all of these videos. Enneagram is so hard for me to pin down.
Love this. Thanks for sharing! ❤️ 4s SP and 7s totally get mistyped.
I'M LITERALLY THIS GIRL. i'm going to gcu for a biology major and plan on going into forensics. bruh whattttttttt. also i'm a 4 LOL.
Woot! Woot! So cool!
When I first took the test, I got 4 as my highest score, followed closely by 6, and I actually can't believe that I'm a 4, till I watch this, like I mostly relate to her as in the core fears and some basic traits she has (eg : feels not belong or fit in anywhere, the way she opens up to people). Also when you described characteristics of a 4w5 (which is what I get from the test). Eventhough there's still a bit of doubt in me that I might be another type. Also, I'm also struggling to find out my subtype since I had all three in me taking turns in events of my life. Can this actually happen?
4w5, but earlier in life was more of a 4w3....I have all 3 subtypes. With different people and their energy it brings out each of these subtypes with me
“Anything but Ordinary” was the name of my MySpace page way back in the day 😂
😂😂😂
ME TOO
Sounds like shes a 4 that might lean towards the 3. Great video! Thank you for sharing!
The Enneagram World does not call anyone 'a sunny type 4'. This is just Hilary McCaskey's notion. The questions are totally leading ones, and being a teenager, she agrees. There's no way she's a 4.
Actually the Inventor of the enneagram Naranjo was the first to use the term sunny 4, to describe SP 4s. If you search on google there should be some stuff from him that comes up,
Including and old lecture on TH-cam from the 90s
Yikes, so many unhealthy 4’s gatekeeping and getting triggered in these comments because their elitism and uniqueness feels threatened! Stop being so cliche, guys!
-another 4
Ah boy can't believe I've been mistyped as a 7, a 1 for being SP4 ...
Maybe wrong place to ask but...
I'm a 4w5 and I think I'm a Sp dom, but I don't really put myself in tough situations or challenge myself. I wouldn't say I totally run from them, but I also wouldn't say I put myself in them. The rest about Sp 4 and 4 in general is actually accurate for me, but not that part. I suffer a bit from anxiety too. Could it be due to that (and maybe the w5)? Thank u 😊
I would never guess a 4. Maybe she's an enfp or enfj is coming thru ?
I'm an infj 4w3 and I haven't figured my variant yet, but I am friendly but this is just so EXTRAVERTED. lol.
Please mam, I am an ENTP 8w7. I am confused between 8w7 vs 7w8.
But I am sure I have a strong 8. Can you give some practical difference between them :)
Sevens think before they do something and Eights do before they think about it. An eight might be more of a workaholic and a seven might be more into experiences. But your Core TYPE comes down to the core fear, core desire, core weakness and core longing...those are very different between the 7 and 8. So once you land on your core type then look at the wings of that type. Hope this helps!
I think I'm a 7w8. Thanks mam 😊
oh man I wish you could chat me. I have so many bits of them all but I Tested as a 4. This gal is very much like me. I am sunny most of the time. But man I can get snappy when frustrated. I also feel sad a lot, but so bubbly like this with others. haha
I feel like she doesn't enough to make the determination herself what her type is.
I think we should stop talking abour the 9 eneatypes and instead talk about the 54 eneatypes, because the subtype and the wing can (and normally do) change drastically the eneatypes. I totally see you as a 4w3 self-preservation! its very different from the 4w5 self-preservation for example (thats my type) and the 4w3 sexual (a friend of mine). Nice video :)
Ok, I'm just curious. Did you consider a 9? I mean 9s are more common than 4s. I'm not saying she's not a 4. But she just seems so agreeable.
Lol the idea of this being a negative image 🙃
Y’all, this ain’t a 4. Listen to Not My Type Enneagram Podcast
I’m a 4 and no way that enthusiastic.
Seriously, did you even watch the video?!
I thought I was a 7 or a 2 when I first read about the enneagram! But I'm 100% a four! I really like the idea of a "sunny type" 4, I think thats what I am but I'd love to know more about what that means!
Love this! I’ll be doing a video on the subtypes of a 4 and this will help on being a sunny four. 😃
Is she an ENFP?
I felt cringe throughout this video, she really doesn’t seem like a 4 and I’m stuck now wondering if it’s actually possible that she might just be one or not. Too much laughter and smiles, expressive actions and facial reactions. Of course she could be an INFJ 4 but she gives off a sensing vibe to me, don’t ask me why.
Being bookish or been typed by someone professional means nothing to me, anyone can answer those questions you dished out despite not being a four and I’m speaking objectively. Nothing else from her gave me the impression that she’s one at all and answers were rather vague as well.
On the other hand I think I’m a self pres 4 and my understanding of this subtype is that it has a contained energy, you feel that there’s some heaviness to me but yet I don’t show anything on my face, it’s all internal. Even my anxiety can’t be seen on the outside despite having great amounts of it. I kid around and laugh more than I smile, I don’t really talk about my inner struggles I prefer to hear yours instead. A long suffering SP dom is a more toned down version of Social subtype, I try to move away from my own emotions, I prefer to feel neutral than to feel sadness or an overdose of happiness. I enjoy melancholy and I like heavy stuff but I feel like there are times for that, I just can’t be in suffering mode 24/7. Not forgetting that however sunny a 4 is, he/she will still struggle with very volatile and intense emotions, to the extent that people feel uncomfortable around me sometimes.
I feel like she can’t explain in depth why and how deep she feels about her emotions, I don’t show my negative side to others but when asked about my feelings you can bet that it won’t just be a one or two liner. I like to make the atmosphere lighter, but her energy feels like a totally different type altogether. The 4 is a suffering type, enduring, displaying suffering and making others suffer, so I really feel that negativity and heaviness should accompany this type because it has been living in pain all this while, how happy can one be when your drug is something that you love but kills you internally at the same time? I can only speak for turbulent types because I’ve yet to meet assertive type fours.
Then again she might just be a 4w3, and I’m looking from a wing 5 perspective. But then again we see Lana Del Rey, a 4w3 but still very melancholic with toned down dreamy energy. Jeffree star, 3w4 but still none of that burning bright neon energy.
I’ve heard about the sunny 7 four but I feel like type 1 is more me than 3 or 7. But this is the first time I’ve seen a “seven-ish 4”, I could be wrong about my judgements but it’s just a feeling don’t kill me.
This is NOT 4. You're literally spreading misinformation.
What do you think she "is"? ? ^^
shes a counter type 4 I am the same as her and I can assure you she loves Emotion and she can be very emotional alone
@@zaptuno9148 Loving emotion is not 4. 4 is *structurally* not inclusive of the sunny side of the emootional wheel -- it's a Frustration type (Types 1, 4, 7), a Reactive type (Types 4, 6, 8), and an image type (2, 3, 4) invested in making clear their disagreement with the World and people. 4s have a narrow set of emotions that they associate themselves with -- this is alluded to if you look at the enneagram symbol itself. The 4 Point on the symbol is sharp ('frustrated, reactive'), narrow (hyper-specific), and has a downward/Underworld ('negative') thrust. 4 is in varying states of disgust, contempt, disappointment, reactive frustration...as opposed to embracing "all their emotions." Watch some interviews with actual 4s: Prince, Bob Dylan, Morrissey.
@@dfgray44 All those guys (whom we didn’t know personally) probably were happy at times. Their public images were far more stormy, but real humans are more nuanced than any PR image.
Plus, some folks can experience various moments of sadness, frustration, and alienation, all in a day, and just kind of feel fine afterward and still see themselves as basically happy. It seems to be baked into the 4s moody nature to not see that kind of emotional mini-coaster as unusual or a sign of depression.
and you’re literally rude
The temperament of the sp 4 may be sunnier THAN other fours not LIKE stereotypical 7s or 2s. I doubt she is a 4 but if she wants to lie to herself that's her choice.
dude, that’s so rude. i relate to her and i’m a four. you don’t know what goes on inside of her. i have experienced so much improvement in my life since i realized my patterns being a four. so, in typical four fashion i will tell you that you don’t know us and don’t get to type us, thank you.
@@SparklesNJazz you are being rude for trying to censor my opinion, it's my experience and I've haven't read anything like this in Naranjo, Helen Palmer or in Riso and Hudson, its just a badly explained Chestnut sub-subtype. Also she never get deep in her wound, just shallow stereotypes and feel goodsie shit
She's not a four.
I see someone who is very 3 than 4
She's not a 4 - she's an EMO Type 9. THE SP4s I know are miserable.
I’m definitely a 4 (balanced wings, INFP-T) and I’m not miserable. Not sure people would call me sunny, but I’m definitely not miserable (at least not that often).
All SP4s aren't "miserable" though.
Wow, that's offensive.
except you can be a well developed, well balanced four and NOT be miserable. all types have different levels of healthiness. she seems like a healthy four.
@@SparklesNJazz Well said!
This person is absolutely not a 4. The "countertype" of self-pres "sunny 4" is a bizarre extrapolation of Naranjo's original self-preservation 4 which he called "reckless/dauntless", the idea being that self-pres 4 "suffers in silence" and puts themselves in physical and financial risk in pursuing their emotional whims. This morphed over time to account for mistyped 9s who saw themselves as 4s.
Both the sunny 4 and the "dauntless" 4 are wrong. A 4 is a type that is concerned with honing in on what aspects of their identity are uniquely their own - not a product of upbringing, culture, or even life experience. This is achieved by introspection and over-differentiating themselves from anything external - other people, the world, what's "common", etc. There is a strong element of rejecting everything in type 4, trying to hone in on what's singular and unique to one's identity. It's not "special" in a generic sense, there's a seeking of what is unique and meaning or significant because it is precious, rare, and authentically "one's own" rather than an accident of life/upbringing/culture.
This "romantic" who focuses on deep, meaningful connections - that's 1) not a 4, and 2) could be any type.
The person in the video does not demonstrate any of the "against-ness", the chronic frustration, or need to individuate and differentiate themselves that is characteristic of 4.
Check out Big Hormone Enneagram's "Not a 4" episode or their episodes on countertypes.
Reading your comment i immediatly tought "another john luckovich fan" .
In any domain it is very important to read different articles and books from different authors. And when you see that everybody thinks the same about something, but only one dude has a different opinion... well you get it.
John actually i think is very toxic. Just bc he suffered more in life or idk what is with him, it doesnt mean every 4 needs to be exactly like him. He judges everybody...
Is very important to let the people decide their own type.
Also, type 4 it is the romantic, can find beauty in everything, and bc of this, they are very sensitive and deep. But beeing a frustration type, and having envy as vice, they always feel like something is missing. Some suffer less, others more.
I'm a 4 and nothing like this girl. But we are much more than just 9 numbers...
@@Edinaa
the only people who think i'm toxic are people who are mistyped and want to keep ignoring the distinctions i'm making. your counter isn't based on anything i'm actually saying and just a deflection to the appropriateness of what i'm saying - a major red flag for 9s, who commonly mistype as 4s, is tone policing instead of engaging with content.
it's important to let people decide their own type, granted they have accurate information and are accurately applying it to themselves. i want to present accurate information. when so many people mistype, they alter how people understand and teach about a certain type. in this case, "4" is almost entirely described just as sensitive 9.
" type 4 it is the romantic, can find beauty in everything, "
why would a frustration type that emphasizes being unique find beauty in everything? isn't the melancholy associated with 4 rooted in the lack of seeing beauty in everything? an attachment type like 9 would see the beauty in everything because 9 has this connection to "Everything" in order to facilitate attachment.
4s aren't that romantic - again, that's 9. 4s are double-frustration, ie they reject. 9s seek attachment, so they idealize, romanticize, and often try to force themselves to see the positive in someone over and above what's actually real for that person.
people think i make these distinctions to 'gatekeep' 4ness - no, if you don't actually see the type accurately, it renders the enneagram useless, instead of being something to help us see the prison we're in, it becomes a tool to reinforce self-fascination and identification.
John your 1st sentence says it all. ‘The only people who think I am toxic are those who are mistyped.’ That is deflection. ‘Disagree w me and you are mistyped!’ C’mon man. I actually agree with many of your assessments, but the ‘toxicity’ element comes into play when you invite yourself to tell others that they are wrong in their self-reflection. C’mon dude, this is not a science. And I also agree about the 4 and Romanticism part-I only felt that in terms of death. I mean, the person I felt closest to was Emily Dickinson, who is a 5w4. I actually think you have many good insights, but telling people they’re not the type they believe is invasive and shows a lack of boundary recognition. That is likely what Edina was referring to in her remark.
@@Jessicaunarex that's not deflection, that's just how the pattern pans out over and over. accusing me of being toxic isn't the same thing as disagreeing, but there are some types that feel the need to make disagreement into a moral wrong. i don't tell people they're mistyped, but i'll definitely point out where someone says "this is something type X would do" and it is clearly the tendency or trait of a different type. And yeah, on a video that's being used as a public exemplar, i will absolutely point out where those exemplars are not exemplars at all - this over-confident perpetuation of bad information is leading to people not able to make accurate distinctions, and thus, to people unable to engage with the enneagram beyond "i relate!" superficial nonsense.
emily dickinson is a 9.
This girl is not a 4.
What do you think she is? :) 7?