How INFPs Defy Their Stereotype
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 11 ก.ย. 2024
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How was this comment 2 hours ago when the came out a few seconds ago
I was expecting to see me doing the 1 arm pullup as defying the stereo type xD
subscribed!!!!
Yay! 🤗
ahhh the shameless self promo pinned comment
People think INFP's are innocent, clueless yet they are weirdly and secretly I guess the most mature and realistic at times.
That’s a good way to cope, I suppose 😐
Wow this is so true 👏👏👏
I'd like to think that I'm mature and realistic sometimes but often doubt it just because I am the one who thinks I'm mature and realistic and that could mean that I'm deluded by what I want to believe.
@@yuletide4452 this is also fucking true😔
I don't think mature is the right word. While I think I seem mature, I believe that I am "behind" in terms of being active and present in life compared to most of my friends. Though I believe that when I look back at my actions and others, I get greater insight than them, and I can use it for my future self. So I would rather say "insightful".
I am only sharing my view though, what I wrote might not apply to every INFP.
the “hopeless romantic” stereotype is the most inaccurate to me. every INFP i know is really grounded when it comes to relationships because they’ve grown so familiar with navigating their personal feelings.
I think INFPs are usually romantics when they're younger? At least I was until I was in a relationship that didn't work and I knew I didn't want to fall into something without thinking it through first. But also I'm dumb so idk I might just process things slower
Disagree on that, being a hopeless romantic actually fits the INFP. Maybe you just have a wrong definition of what a hopeless romantic is?
i agree with the both of you. i still daydream a lot and generally get consumed by fantastical worlds and if being a hopeless romantic means that, i agree with it hahah. i love the romanticism movement too. i guess i was referring to the idea that INFPs are useless at making logical judgments and have no control over their emotions?
@@resilientum Yeah true, that's a wrong stereotype. Nonetheless, we are probably more eager to follow our dreams/emotions rather than logical decision making, because let's be honest, living life the logical way is just fcking boring :p
Being a hopeless romantic for me means that when I start dating someone, I am usually way ahead of the game compared to the person I'm dating with. That is, I see us having kids, going on vacations, stuff like that. When other people see dating (and even relationships) as a more formal thing
I describe myself as a hopeless romantic but it’s not like I act on anything 😂. I’m satisfied with the thought of dying single.
I have so many INFP friends. They are so smart lol, sometimes can be overly sarcastic and critical. But sometimes they are also have that emo phase
can confirm
Are you my friend because that sounds like something like how I expect my friend would describe me. LMAO
@*insert type* I was never fully emo, but I did wear dark clothes and have long hairstyles and sad as shit. I just never listened to the right music and have the same mannerisms
Me
Yep thats me lol
At last! An accurate video about INFPs produced by a non-INFP
You can also check the channel « cognitive personality theory »
Isn't he an infp?
@@brainlet1269 yesssssssssss he's amazing at understanding INFP's
@@tharumigajanayake6777 I think he's an INFJ
@@brainlet1269 I love his channel so much and how he's able to describe INFPs (and also other types) so well!!
As an INFP I really appreciate this video. I think most people perform INFPs as the dumb ones in the group that are depressed and poetically cry, and sometimes even myself thought that, and I even struggled with that assumed traits, because I thought they didn't fit me. But I hope this video helps other people too!
No! It is not dichotomical only! There are 14 (or 12?) DISC types, the rest inluding INFP - INFP are "the third constant" Earth ... I'm INFP and Asperger and an official Weilder of "three" ... for example: Third Hemisphere and Third Leg.
@Teodora Paula Mocanu Höh! I was just about to comment on it too! ; )
@Teodora Paula Mocanu Never thought I would find a fellow hatari fan in here
@@huntedsnark7507 OMG, two hatari fans, is this real life?
@@goodnightsocialite1064 the infiltration is going well ... obviously 😉
Actually... probably they just appeal to INxx types (I'm intp and I know of a few other intx and infx too 😁)
Oh ... And if Matthías isn't an INxx himself I'd be very surprised!
As an infp, I think people assume we are constantly dwelling in our emotions and for a lot of thinking types they can equate that to us being sad. While I admit, I do take a lot of time to process my emotions, because of that I feel I am incredibly strong emotionally. We take time to know our emotions so I think the stereotype of us being emotionally weak is wrong. We know our emotions inside and out and because of that a (healthy) infp will usually be very strong emotionally.
We're not scared of our emotions and therefore, generally quite stoic and in control of our emotions compared to other
I feel this way too. Mostly an infp who is constantly improving themselves, and self-aware, the emotional stability is very obvious.
Yes, exactly. This explained it perfectly!
Right, it’s not even always dwelling in *sentiment* but in assessing things with our values. We definitely own our feelings though, in that we are very aware of them and when healthy, consider ourselves accountable for them. We know well in advance when we’re getting stressed, upset, or angry, and that can make for being REALLY effective in hiding it.
@@nerysghemor5781 VERY effective at hiding it. Ironically, the overly hysterical, attention seeking drama queen is antithetical to everything an INFP is.
people: INFPs are overly emotional
me an INFP: *rarely shows any emotion*
*never cried in public*
*calm and stoic*
accurate
Accurate ×2
This is me
I use to be like that. But then I felt like I'm too distamt so I show my emotions in public. Turns out either way I'm still mostly alone and no one gives a shit so yeah.
@@kaylynchua9574 lol i was only making a point. yea, i totally get what you you mean. i’ve done the same. life and times of an INFP i suppose
As an INFP, I think what I don’t see acknowledged enough is INFP anger, and with it, inner strength. Of course the type synopses all say that INFPs will fiercely defend their values when necessary, but this aspect is virtually always lost in the stereotypes. I’ve had some very serious fights over social issues with people this last year, even losing those relationships because of it, and I *genuinely* regret nothing I said or did. They were fights worth having. I tried to be gentle with the ones I loved, but with some people, I held back absolutely nothing. My honest judgement was open, brutal, and unapologetic. And all this was actually a result of my *growth* - I was no longer afraid to have some necessary and long-overdue confrontations.
The stereotype would have people say that INFPs would rather shirk from conflict no matter what. The reality is that when we’ve decided strength is necessary and we can go in with no second-guessing, we are capable of being an absolute force to be reckoned with. Fearless and decisive.
I absolutely agree with you, while I hate pointless, shallow discussions and try my best to avoid them when it comes to certain topics or situations I just cannot turn a blind eye to them and will be ruthless and unapologetic about my opinions. I get so heated up sometimes it’s ridiculous, and it’s definitely something that’s often looked up upon us INFPs
True. We are opinionated because we think a lot, WE OVERTHINK, because we always take into account what others say or for others' sake and weigh everything out. We are not weaklings. We hold on to our values, beliefs, and principles stronger than anyone else and are lovers of justice.
Yessss, INFPs are actually fearless when it comes to what they believe. Even if that's just wanting to wear a whacky hat and not caring about judgement or bullying, or a more serious issue, in which they will even stand up to those they love and don't want to fight with.
They are suprisingly strong, and also rather hopeful in those more important arguments. If you don't argue you can't change people's minds, you can't open their eyes. Sometimes force is the kindest thing, and the most 'mediator' quality, because you want to not just seek peace in a personal way ..but in the whole world, and to do that requires some fierceness.
FACTS.
I agree with the anger. I have had so much trouble with anger and processing it out. I personally have felt anger over people and the selfish decisions they make, and not a one off decision. It’s one selfish decision after another. Sometimes I’ve just felt so mad feeling like the only one that really thinks of how my decisions will affect others.
This was definitely extremely accurate.
I disagree. I think me post should be over yours.
@Brett Remington Hi Brett. Did you see my post somewhere? Did it get lifted up? I put evidence That Rebuked this. I'm disagreeing :) INFPs do cry more before 30, and after 30 - to God. I appreciate your view :)
Maybe that's Asperger ...
@Brett Remington Thank You. Truth Hurts, when I'm hurt because of introverting 30 years uncomfortable, i announce: I'll Truth you to misery, or you will acknowledge my achived Power which I've aqcuired from Allah at Tahajjud (night). Because The Police and "Norway" told me Harshly to ask Allah and not allowing me to Pray at Dawn with Them.
Studying to be a teacher and my lesson plans have mostly been a dumpster fire 😂
I am married to one. Definitely doesn’t cry a lot and is stoic and kind. Incredibly well versed in others’ emotions and has high values and standards. Incredibly intelligent and into understanding people well even if they are authors... maybe, especially if they are authors. Incredible set of morales and yeah sort of disorganized. But, I see him as being more relational and aware and not pushing his vision onto others.
Very well put, as an INFP, I can tell you love your partner deeply, because you understand him. Bravo! I wish you both the best...and uhm, yeah, carry on, enough sentimentality.
Overly emotional thing has also made me think why people have this stereotype, emotional side of INFP makes them approach things from another deep perspective, be gentle and understand people's feelings, not cry every second something happens.
Finally, all this stereotypes were what made me think that maybe I wasn't an INFP, because I am emotionally stable to the external world I mean I don't have emotional outbursts, I got the best grades in my class (I want to demonstrate to myself that I have Te even when I don't know the MBTI, that was really stressful but I was doing it for me not for my parents or other people) and now I'm studying maths because I have a strong logic (also I'm a Ravenclaw relating to the last video) but I know that I am an INFP, the thing that I pursue is to be myself and be free and I also have that love-hate relationship with the world, in one minute I can be devoted to life and the next think that it is too ugly. I know that spirits don't exist but that's not a reason to stop talking to them and believing in them because if that makes me happy why don't do it?
I am an INFP who has a strong interest in Information Technology. I have to think logically especially for my job so it's not like I try to find emotional meaning in all the things I do. If anything I think a person's feelings are simply a natural part of themselves so there's no need to deeply analyze your emotions or get worked up over them. I also did not really think I was an INFP as the stereotypes just did not fit me at all. I am one however considering that I can worked up if I see something that goes against my values and I also hate thinking in absolutes. The world we live in can be quite mundane but it can be surprisingly complex as well so it would be a shame to ignore it completely.
_EDIT_
One of the repliers mentioned about their imagination and it reminded me how lost I can get if I'm given the opportunity. As a working adult I still have an active imagination and would create these fantasy or sci-fi worlds on a regular basis. I have a friend who is typed INTP and we can bounce ideas off each other and somethings they get wild and silly! He happens to be the artist despite how logical he is to his day to day living so go figure!
Wow i'm the opposite. I'm an INTP that though I was INFP because sometimes I am emotional and I love art but still I don't see life like INTFs do, my perspective and decisions are INTP so the stereotypes confuses a lot of people lol
Me too except that cognitive functions led me back to infp
Me too! I'm a very complete INFP, fantasy worlds and all, but I was also the best in my class, perhaps school, at Math. There were times in which I corrected my Math teachers xD I was really good at it. I went for economy at first cause I was so good at it and society pushes you for those talents, but my brain was always more interested in creating stories so I changed xD which was probably the biggest disappointment my mom had. She often says "my kid was so good at math and now she screwed it up. What a waste" lol
In making decisions, I usually go with the emotional one, but I do have logical thinking
@@6maria94 I understand what you say. In high school I decided that I was going to study journalism and some teachers and my grandmother were very disappointed when I stop learning sciences (they think I would do biology or physics or something like that). I ended up studying maths but I don't want to change the past because that show people that they can't be sure of what I will do, because being good at something doesn't mean that that's what you want.
Stereotyping is a thing that people do to generalize the traits of a type of person, object, etc.
But because of that generalization, it changes and/or exagerrates the meaning of that thing
-Me, an INFP
As a person who dated an INFP for 3 years. Yes, this is true. Make THIS the stereotype, please.
What's your type??
@@Silversubs29078 ENFJ ;)
@@ruthstalkingagain4315 I know a lot of supportive Enfj's based on my experience. -Infp
I couldn't agree more about the emotions. We INFP's are in tune with our emotions. They are a familiar friend we are use to and know how to use them. Meaning at the end of the day we are better at expressing them without being ashamed of them. Emotions are a driving force within us, but anyone who knows me can tell you I am pretty much in a stoic state all the time. Where as there are other people who find emotions to be a foreign entity within them. The kind of people who base their life on pure logic where emotion is almost meaningless, but it's there no matter if they like it or not. These are the kinds of people who can lose it the moment their emotions come out. They don't know what to do with them. Yeah, I may cry in a moving moment and people can say what a baby, but at least I don't think it's the end of the world the moment I feel sad about something like others do.
Yea you say it so perfectly
I have to laugh because it's too accurate.😂
I think this is a common misunderstanding of the cognitive functions. Extroverted feeling is crying in front of someone, introverted feeling is more like staying unreadable in front of others and then breaking down alone lol.
Also I’ve never heard anyone say this about the forced development of Te but I find it true in my life. I thought I was a thinking type because I do tend to be “the voice of practical reason” but then I realized it’s because I grew up with all xSTJs and had to learn Te and Si in school. Good observations, I feel understood! Lol
one infp stereotype is that we're cute, innocent, submissive and bubbly
innocent? hmmm idk
@@linneav1064 maybe naive might be more accurate?
@@meredith3588 naive is the word actually, a thinking type once told me I was "too naive."
Imagine how hard it is when you also look the part!
@@meredith3588 yeah sometimes! but it really depends. I can be very trusting and put people on pedestals even when they are not that good people
I've certainly been the voice of reason in a lot of my relationships with friends, often mediating their actual romantic relationships as a sort of counselor. I also really agree on the imagination point too. I often find my daydreams to be far more interesting than whatever is happening in the real world, but it certainly doesn't mean I don't notice it.
FACT! I second this.
When I was a little infp I used to escape the world by going into my imagination, but as I've experienced trauma with age I prefer to escape into other people's imaginations (fantasy media, music, etc) or constantly consume information, because my own mind is full of nightmares.
I hope you're situation has improved in any form, whether it's related to what you've said or not!
Are you going into therapy or getting help otherwise??
Sending you much love and healing!💚💚💚💚
Infp's are a type that welcomes a paradox or contradiction. They can believe in multiple things at once and feel/ think multiple things at once, thus they can actually be much more complex than 'cute innocent cinnamon role'
I have loathed crying in front of other people my entire life. I remember crying at a mall when I was a toddler and covering/hiding my face from everyone bc I was so intensely compelled to for reasons I, a god damn toddler, couldn’t possibly explain to myself let alone anyone else lol and it’s one of the reasons why I know I’m definitely an INFP. So managing to stay stoic while I try to internally and privately iron out what I’m feeling so I can handle it better was something that I developed really early in life due to some traumatic stuff in my childhood. And for a good chunk of my life it worked out ok and helped me get through a lot of bullshit while appearing to be able to keep it cool.
But eventually that function I came up with to show no emotion, and eternally play it cool in every situation no matter what, turned against me like an ingrown toenail. The emotions piled up from a lack of expression (not that I didn’t try, I am a god damn song writer for fucks sake), and I became very emotionally unstable. I couldn’t hide from others how depressed or distraught I was, and so I kind of became that stereotype for a little while.
So now I’m at a place in my life where I’m trying to relearn and redevelop, I guess, that mode of function to meet a tsunami of emotions in a cool and collected manner, in a way that it doesn’t go beyond that point of becoming an unhealthy habit of suppressing all of my emotions for the sake of keeping them private.
Unless it’s an anonymous comment on a great video lol then I’m gonna give you my life’s story lol thanks for the video, it was great and made me feel pretty good about myself 😎 lol
Omg same
U can join the Love who discord server, U can talk to like minded people about this
Wow thank you for sharing that. You actually make people feel better and belonged through this, just like me, for I can relate at most part. Yes, it's right that I am an emotional person but I never, almost never, even cry and just pile up all extreme emotions within as a defense mechanism in the crappy situation I am in. I have a lot of weird outbursts from time to time due to letting out the huge stack of emotions I have been bottling up. Yes, it is indeed not really healthy. I hope I can learn from you and from my own experience as well.
You are not alone. When I was a child I felt ashamed for crying because apparently that is for "weak" people (that's what everybody said...) and I was constantly judging myself for doing so because of that wrong idea my context put in my mind.
But now, after a lot of introspection I know I can be emotional, but strong and firm at the same time, I can cry wherever and whenever I want and I don't mind what others say about it. "This is me, world. I'm not your robot anymore" I accept me as I am.
I love that you mentioned that infps are overwhelmingly aware of the real world. I think we are often the most the most cynical and pessimistic type ...hence the sad artist trope. But I think it' the imagination that allows us to see the potential for good and for hope.
They know the world, they know how awful it can be, they might even be weirdly fascinated by it, but they want to believe in hope and a world of magic, where good can prevail.
I also think another assumed trait is quietness or cowardice. I think a lot of infps are actually very talkative ( in short bursts ) and actually very open and brave ( especially in the emotional sense, they are unafraid of vulnerability or being judged, they will stand out and speak out if it's important to them.)
Although we feel deeply it’s introverted feeling and expressing feelings out loud is not comfy... at least not until we have processed the feeling internally and worked out why we feel this way and where it fits in with our values and belief system.. then we’re happy to express it.
"Lost in their imagination" I've just confronted my ex in 14.000.000 different imaginary scenarios earlier this day and cried over some of them, clearly INFP's can't be lost in their imagination haha
INFPs are definitely good at fantasizing
the stereotypes are mostly filled with the immature traits
Imagination is something amazing. We can be extremely creative in the real world and with art because of it.
@@sansnitizer i don't think imagination is an immature trait tho
@@pauljack2267 simply, i didn't say it was an immature trait
I think some of the stereotypes do apply, but it depends on the situation. I’m a different person when I’m by myself compared to when I’m around people. When it comes to being emotional, I am sometimes a mess inside, but I hide everything from others as much as possible. Growing up, emotions were bad. It only made you a target. I learned to be invisible as much as possible.
Same! When I'm by myself I feel all of my emotions very deeply. Happiness, sadness, silliness, anger, etc. But I'm stone-faced depending on who's around me. I have to really trust you to let you see any of my emotions. Sometimes even the happy ones.
Dear INFP ladies, You keep me sane. I feel safe with you. Thank u. Love, INTJ female 🥇🍰🌷
Safe 😃
I don’t know if I’m a exception but I’d say the stereotype that we’re hopeless romantics.
Maybe it’s because I’ve heard a lot the mantra of “do not expect a charming prince. Fairytales don’t exist”... but I am firmly grounded on earth when it comes to romance. I take it slow, don’t grow big expectations and, really, I’m not even sure if I was ever stereotypically “in love”. I love my fiancée so much, but I never lost my head over him like people say it is when you’re in love. I am a person and he is a person, we’re both complete individuals that love to spend time together and help each other grow. I don’t know what in real life could be more romantic than that.
(But in fiction I do love those exaggerations, outrageous love stories about soulmates and etc lol I enjoy the hell out of them! Daydream a lot about them with my fictional characters! I just know pretty well to separate fiction from reality).
Oooo me too, I agree
I believe this is because of how we're so hyperaware of how underwhelming and harsh the "real world" is and also how we're also so in tune with our inner worlds that we know where to draw the lines of our inner worlds with the real world. We do bleed our ideals and values into our daily life and might affect the relationships but ultimately wouldn't force the other individual to conform to it. At least for me, that's how it is.
Those idealistic hopelessly romantic love stories are TOO BEAUTIFUL to not love, it's just an escape rather than an ideal for me personally ☺️☺️
I’m very skeptical of dating nowadays and actively suppress my feelings most the time
I agree! I find most overly-romantic gestures to be kind of embarrassing. I'm single for the first time in 26 years so who knows what romance is any more?
@@AlexHolland123 I am with you in this. I do not even hope for a significant other. I am often the one who gives realistic love advice to my friends in a relationship.
After reading Jung I got a very good grasp of what's going on when I fall in love. I'm realistic in the sense that I make small moves and come off as casually interested plus I take rejection well, but if I'm to the point of asking them out for a drink it's because I consider them to potentially be marriage material for me at least (to use Jung's terms, because I recognize my own anima in them, and man when that thing appears in front of you and grasps you it's kinda frightening, it's a transcending experience, but that doesn't necessary mean you'll turn crazy and do stupid things, you can learn to handle it without feeling any less emotion).
If memory serves me correctly, I was constantly praised during separate portions of my school years for being more organised and, dare I say, more pragmatic and observational than my peers. Especially in subjects that fall outside of the artistic spectrum.
Never knew that was an act of defiance considering how hell-bent I was on following rules and being punctual.
Love your work, Nathan.
Same!!
The blessing and curse of the infp is having strong ideals that we know are impossible and learning to find contentment and joy in the little things. And because we are classical romantics and dreamers, we tend to protect ourselves by grounding our expectations and guarding our hearts.
This is very well explained! I'm an INFP, but I am *always* analyzing just about everything, examining the schematics of things and how they work, running mental simulations of possible outcomes, and psychoanalyzing people as I interact them, all in the name of greater understanding. This comes from a thirst for knowledge of all the whats, whys, and hows in life. I also have regular internal philosophical debates on the nature of life and how things fit together, and frequently test and retest theories, schemas, and what I think I know is true, second-guessing everything I know about myself and the social order ("yes, but is it _really_ true? Am I _really_ going in the right direction?") in the name of self-improvement. A far cry from "devoid of logic"!
I know for my part that I don't like people seeing me cry, because it shows signs of emotional weakness. Far as I can tell (others may differ), most of the emotional stuff goes on _inside_ the INFP, only bubbling to the surface when there's too much of it to successfully hide.
Spot on
An INFP's daughter here! I recieve my mum as overemotional and unrational from time to time, but I am a thinker, so... But many people think emotional = crybaby, which I can not confirm. My mum is a tought person. We are both unorganized and some situations between us are... well... interesting. A stereotype which bothers me a lot is that INFPs are extremly shy and avoid people. I don't know about other INFPs, but in my mum's case this is not true at all. She knows a lot of people and enjoys their company, while I despite beeing an extrovert perceive humans mostly as pesky.
As I INFP-A, I can confirm that we are actually quite sociable and DO like other people in general.
But we prefer small groups instead of large crowds.
Type is inherited, if you're female you are both the same type but different subtypes.
@@timefortee do you have any source for this claim? We both took the test and she is an INFP while I am an ENTP. We both function quiet differently.
@@zwischenburkaundbikini2418 I said this knowing that it is the number one taboo for MBTIsts.
PS: I gain nothing but unpleasant feedback mentioning this once in a year or two, but I still do in order to prompt people to view their family members not through rigid stereotypes but more objectively.
@@timefortee so you say something that is nonsence without any source to proof it. This is not breaking taboo. It is actually pretty common in the internet.
I think the thing with the "being lost in our imagination" which i will say as a INFP i love just make up scenarios and stuff in my head but because of that we know that its just our imagination it also can make us very aware of reality and be the voice of reason because we are also very aware of what our imagination is and the difference between imagination and reality
I agree with everything you said. I particularly liked your comment about INFPs being stoic. I’m an INFP and I try to practice stoicism, especially if I’m struggling with something.
I don't get emotional when somefriend asks for my advice ,i become so rational and talk in logic,on the other hand i feel their problems as mine so it becomes so consuming and i need time alone so i stop being logical or rational and being overwhelmed by their emotions replaces it
True
Exactly!
I do get emotional but when I don't know what to say to that friend (if it's a big problem) tho. I think is my way to express that i care and that i'm there support him/her (?)
"overly emotional"
GODDAMMIT
My sister is an INFP
She is very emotionally stable, stoic and cries less than I do; I'm an ISTP, so your can imagine how little I see her cry.
She mostly makes decisions using her feelings, when I get in a fight with any of my friends I tell her how I feel so she'd tell them because she phrases it better than I do.
If I did the talking I'd ruin everything I'm too blunt when it comes to emotions and would make it sound harsh.
Sometimes she worries too much about possibilities and this sometimes drives me crazy, because I know the world isn't as wild as her imagination, and is mostly boring af.
I almost cried because I finally found someone say the absolute truth about my personality!! PRAISE!!! I’m gonna use your words from now on cause it’s perfectly fitting!!
Im an INFJ and my boyfriend is apparently an INFP. I used to confuse him for an INTJ because of how closed off and aloof he is. Hes very independent and self sufficient. He likes to take care of himself first, then help others. He seems to think more logically than he does emotionally. He hates inefficiency. He isnt very good with comforting people or being empathetic. Hes not mushy or romantic. You could see why i thought he was INTJ lol so i made him take the test and he got INFP? I dunno lol He can be emotional and cry on his own time, hes very passionate about his hobbies and his inner world. Hes messy and doesn't get bothered with clutter. Hes better at living in the past or in the present. He doesnt get anxious thinking about the future. Hes nostalgic and loves his childhood hobbies. Hes a good listener. He hates to disappoint me or himself, but at the end of the day he will always make sure hes making himself happy and puts himself first. He has BOUNDARIES that he doesn't like ppl crossing. He tends to get uncomfortable very easily. He cares too much about what ppl think of him yet hes unapologetic about his interests and his appearance at the same time. He has a hard time showing it, but his feelings run deep, esp for me. I think he needs me more than i need him but he'd never say it. Hes a hard personality type to figure out 😅
I’m actually sitting her blown away by how accurately this describes me over the course of my entire lifetime. Every. Single. Point is dead on me to a T. I’m really grateful for this, it helps me understand myself so much more (which you already know is what we’re all about).
I hate the "emotional" stereotype.
We are emotional, we just don't want you to see it because it's something so private, so intimate.
i never plan for myself, i always plan for others. since the rest of the world likes their timeframes so much, and that they want them to be stable. i thought this was a non-infp thing, but now youve helped me see that it is not! yes, it gives me actual freedom time, since i have completed reality time in this world then.
"If you know someone in your life who is prone to having emotional breakdowns..."
... it's probably just the death throes of 2020.
This is, perhaps, the most accurate INFP video I've ever seen. Thanks for defending us from these stupid & dismissive stereotypes that are really only true if one is not actualized. . Great work! Cheers!
I wish I could pin your comment , minimal but accurate :D
I've never felt so understood like this ever in my life
I remember back when the pandemic wasn´t such a big thing, and people underestimated the consequences it would cause, such as lockdown. Might have been a coincidence but it was me and my infp friends who were first to accept this was going to happen before it did, 1 enfj too. Then, my intp and istj friend who are normally the "rational ones" were in complete denial about the situation until lockdown was actually enforced by government. And EVEN then, they thought the whole thing would be over in 2 weeks, while me and the other infps were sure it was going to last longer.
Yes, that happen to me too except I don't visualize a lockdown where I live. Almost everybody tell the virus will be over in matter of weeks and my husband and I telling the contrary.
I remember telling my brother this would turn into a pandemic and that it would last a long time. Him being an INTP told me it was impossible etc.
I finally got to say with confidence to his face " I told you so~".
INFP here. Can confirm. Saw the pandemic coming to America months before the lockdown. Was stocking up masks in January. My friends called me crazy. It doesn’t appear to be the case anymore
Yeah I started wearing a mask when no one else did. People gave me weird looks and thought I wanted to protect myself when in reality I already knew it would protect others. I think it's an INFP strength, we are able to accept changes quicker and deal with it better than other types. I'm also quite pessimistic when I think about the realistic future, so it doesn't surprise me when things like this pandemic happen. Like Jonathan said in another video "we are a pessimistic ray of sunshine".
Yeah, I saw this coming a long time ago. Nobody listened or believed me until they saw it on the news
Me, an INFP: 'Why am I not surprised that this comment section is full of essays...'
Ok THIS is my favorite comment.
Recently, discovered I'm INFP and watching this made me realize why all those years ago one of my teachers forced me to "get organized". Apparently my young INFP self had not yet adapted to the orderlyness needed for this world. Her biggest mistake was forcing me to do it her way instead of finding a system that worked for me, and I definitely resented her for it. Later I found a system that worked for me and it wasn't nearly as ridgid. Since that time all through school I was super organized, but now I think I've been allowed to tone it down since my environment isn't all about deadlines anymore...I've somewhat been allowed to revert back to my default...but only somewhat since I've moved to Japan where timeliness is next to godliness and everything is so straight forwardly orderly. Although all in all I've found that it's pretty easy to be an INFP here.
Being one, I can utterly say that this is the most accurate video about INFPs.
OVERLY EMOTIONAL:
I totally agree that it's actually the type with inferior feeling function that tend to have the biggest emotional fluctuations, I've seen and observed it with my ESTJ husband and a former close friend who's an INTP. They don't know how to process or deal with their emotions. It's like a foreign thing for them. Being an INFP however, I loathe to cry in public or in front of everyone even with my closest people like my husband. I was told by him (ESTJ) that I actually don't have any emotions/feelings at all, lol! In reality, internally I feel deeply and I feel a lot, but outwardly I am like a dispassionate, reserved awkward robot.
WEIRD BELIEFS:
I think it's more on how they express their beliefs rather than the beliefs themselves. And also, I think that people perceived INFPs with "weird beliefs" because they really don't have a full insight of their beliefs especially INFPs highly dislike conventional ways and thinking, they have wild, unique and rich imagination that's very hard to even explain verbally, so when they try to verbally express it, it's very easy for some to perceive them as being weird or that they have weird beliefs. (You can tell I'm also struggling to explain it myself, lol!)
DISORGANIZED:
I think that all types can be organized or disorganized, it just depends on what you prioritize first. For example, my ESTJ husband is extremely organized with intangible things like when it comes to running our business, he has a detailed plans and schedule things ahead of time, he's very methodical and systematic but he's disorganized when it comes to tangible things like his clothes, shoes, working space, etc. Me however, can be highly organized with both tangible and intangible matters, it's just that because INFPs are driven by motivations and inspiration, when we lack that, it's very easy to be inconsistent therefore we can be disorganized. That's why it's very important for us that what we do is meaningful and fulfilling.
LOST IN THEIR IMAGINATIONS:
This actually could be true but then again all types can be lost in their imagination as well, I know some ENFPs and INTP who are just like that. I think INFPs can be lost in their imaginations because we're highly aware of the reality and our imaginations are way better than real life, therefore it's very comforting and entertaining to live inside our heads.
THIS!!
Also extroversion.Infps can pass as extroverts,especially when they have developed te a and social skills
Soo true, I never seen my infp friends cry, in fact I was surprised they were an infp, as an infj, we share dark humor together so I guess they can detach themselves sometimes
Overly emotional is true, if you don't see does not mean those emotions don't exist inside of them. Especially men get shamed for showing emotions.
This video is very accurate! I'm an INFP, and I can be very organized when in school and studying, but am disorganized anywhere else. The tennis metaphor really works. I will Te whenever it is necessary, but prefer to be relaxed. Setting goals is a bit hard for me, and is something I only do because I need to.
I love this vid. My family and friends think that Im an INTP, I was also kind of doubtful if I was an INFP or not ,but Im sure I am. For all my whole life people have always been saying that Im so cold or Im emotionless something like that. I've been raised as a child to think that having emotions is a weakness so early on my life I have always been supressing my emotions. I have never blatantly show excitement happiness sadness anger or even when Im frightened. Whenever I cried when I was young I was always ridiculed and hit so I have always hated the thought of crying and being emotionally weak or vulnerable. Due to the environment and certain things in my life I was percieve too as 'mature' in terms of my peers. whenever there would be a group task Im always being push as a leader. due to me being seen as more 'mature' than my friends or classmates I have also been the one to run on when they are having problems. People sometimes ask for my help too to teach them lessons they dont understand but Im not good at explaining or talking 😅 so. Anyway about the stereotype of being depressed I think I understand INFP has introverted feeling as dom so Im sure most INFP would get stuck on strong emotions sadness for example. I agree with what you said about INFP choosing to embrace their imagination because of reality hahaha. Im also quite known as a pragmatic and realist in my group of friends that they always say Im a bummer and or that Im too negative and serious. I have always quite regretful that I 'matured' too early I have missed a lot on my childhood having fun being childish and what not. Being realistic is kind of a curse too. I want to be optimistic I want to achieve greater things and do great good things but reality always beat the shit out of me. I have to consider many many things and careful about every little thing I have to plan for my future too early on whether I want to choose a stable income job or I will pursue what I have interest about. The emotional part.... I have always hated being irrational or letting my emotions affect my judgement. I dont like my emotions bursting suddenly too so its true that I an INFP is emotionally stable. It might seem like Im a T type because of that sentence but I always prioritize my emotions my principles and my security above all else. Despite me not showing it I am a very emotional person I just store it inside me until I broke down lol it happen 3 times so far. Im a pretty emotional person as long as it is fictional I show it clearly that is if its a story novel manga or anime 😅 and well if its in reality I actually dont know whats the right thing to do or act. I mean the expression and stuff especially when someone is crying.
Agree
The stoicism of INFPs was a great observation. I've had many as close friends and they've all shared a very calm, level-headed demeanor. Likewise, one of the most emotionally volatile people I've ever known was an ExTJ. She was apart of my friend group in college and our other INFP friend couldn't stand her for that very reason.
nobody:
me, an infp: not using the "nobody, absolutely nobody" format because it is not unique and everybody uses it :)
you become the very thing you swore to destroy !
@@eardakls one of the many infp contradictions
!
@@ella4754 yeah i agree :D
As an INFP I never got that “overly emotional” bit, because I really am dead inside:’)
Been 3 months since you wrote this, but I hope you're doing somewhat better!
I'm dead outside and overly emotional inside
Hi. I'm an infp and I'm in a journey to get/be more assertive. I really like your channel, you must put a lot of effort in preparing/doing it. congratz. hope you feel it
Me too. Trying to be assertive! How is it going?
I love you thank you finally someone doesn’t paint us emotional train wrecks !!
None of the stereotypes mentioned seem to be exaggerations. I've learned to keep them in check because of unexpected adverse reactions from others. Stoicism I've learned at a very yearly age, depending on it often. But, when no-ones looking (& sometimes when they are) all hell breaks loose.
😍😍 Thank you from an INFP. An example of the last point is... At the last year of school I was elected as one of the most childish persons, because of my „weird beliefs“ and „lost in imagination moments“. The reason for that might be, that I sing all the time and my argumentations seem weird. We should discuss if posting on Social Media makes you an addict and you therefore shouldn’t use them too much - my argumentation was „I can do whatever I want there! If I want to post a snail, I post a snail!“ (It was indeed the last picture on my profile about six months ago). At the same time I was elected as the one with the ugliest hand-writing and teacher favourite. I became teacher‘s favourite because I knew how to organize myself. I wasn‘t able to in primary school. Never wrote down homework, forgot about tests. Skill I needed to work on -> very organized life in my late school years Also, I am not a very good speaker - could this also be an INFP stereotype, that we aren‘t able to express our thoughts in language? And for that reason, I always showed up, for every question. Because I knew that speaking is my weakness and I need to improve it. And I have wonderful thoughts in my mind that I must practice to explain to others.
The suffering artist stereotype is often put on infps without understanding what that really means to an Infp. I regularly get encouraged to pursue talents and passions wholeheartedly, regardless if the obsessive pursuit of those makes me suffer severely.
Infps may be capable of being obsessive with something they feel strongly connected to, but their emotional intelligence can also protect them from themselves and others. They know when they're right in doing something unconventionally but don't cling to the stereotypes that come with it.
also i hate the fact that were always styped as "love dovey" and cheesy people XD like we can also be veryyy dark lol
And btw your thought about the development of our Te it’s spot on. I’ve noticed that about myself. I’ve had to develop Te because of my various jobs and questioned for awhile if I was an infp because of how well developed my Te and Ne are. Sorry I’m going off right now but you’re just so dead on I’m so excited.
Yeah the 'overly emotional' one hits home. Just because we're in touch with our emotions doesn't mean that we unload our every feeling on everyone else. Because we understand them, we don't need to talk them out to get to grips with our emotions as much as others do. In fact, I often think of emotions as a logical chain of thought (eg. X just happened, reminding me of the time Y happened which made me feel Z, hence I am feeling Z now.)
X and Z do not logically follow which can be confusing to some, though understanding how they are linked makes it a lot easier to deal with. Often feelings can be a huge tangled knot, but picking apart at them in our own heads and understanding where the thread follows is a skill I think us INFPs have.
I actually like the stereotype. I've been gaslighted to think my issues were meaningless and I was just being weak. Well, I wasn't, and the stereotype helps me laugh this label out :)
Infp, very accurate especially finding reality sometimes underwhelming
I can't thank you enough for making this video. It genuinely feels so good to be seen for our non-stereotypical aspects and it bugs me the way most channels overuse/generalise INFPs in their skits or explanations with those stereotypes. Your insights were so spot on, i almost cried at the accuracy. (jk i didn't, im defying the stereotype ;)
I don't know, but sometimes I feel like I'm INFP and at other times I'm not. INFPs are usually stereotyped as rays of sunshine and hope (which is somehow true lol) and are very kind and bubbly and shit and here I am with my penchant for sarcasm and dark humor. I also somehow don't sit with the oVeRlY eMoTiOnAl stereotype because /tw/ the night my dad, um, went to heaven (bc "died" just sounds so morbid), MAN, I WAS SO FREAKING STOIC THAT I FELT SORRY FOR THE DOCTOR BC I KNEW HE WAS CREEPED OUT. Must be the shock, or expectations that "that" will happen, that I became detached or something.
Though I have a question, is it also an INFP thing that sharing VERY personal things to people you barely know?
Anyway, great content! ❤️
Wow, this video was spot on. I've been an INFP every time I've taken the test, and this video speaks to the ways in which I don't fit the stereotypes. During the pandemic, I've found myself having to become much more organized and doing more planning, as I'm no longer dashing out to the store whenever I need/want something. I'm also making sure I'm never even close to running out of t.p. or anything else important. :)
Thank you for stroking my ego. Real talk, great video! You always come up with insightful depictions of the types.
These stereotypes are the reason why I struggle to realize that I was an infp. I’m almost never overly emotional nor disorganized. I don’t get easily offended just like how others stereotyped them. I was only those stereotypes when I was a child but now I’m older and more mature. Also I’m capable of defending myself.
Wow, I can't believe that you've never seen any of the INFPs in your life cry!
Thanks for this video Nathan! You are the only non-INFP TH-camr I know of who seems to really understand my INFP type. You give us far more depth than a lot of other TH-camrs who end up playing off stereotypes. Thank you so much for that 🙂
Very accurate! People often confuse "emotional" with "dramatic". Personality types that don't really know how to deal or ignore their emotions tend to be more dramatic than INFPs who allow themselves to at least experience them. Let's not forget that Fi is an introverted Judging function. Our inner world is usually very stractured. It is with the outer world that we struggle....
The disorganized is a big one. I'm an INFP but I love making spreadsheets for my finances, printing out a routine, and having a very precise way I organize my stuff.
YES new infp video!!!! I've been waiting!
What I really love about this channel is just how thoughtful and accurate it is, especially as an INFP, the online world misconstrues INFP's so much that the stereotype becomes the misshapen form of the real thing... And it is damaging and harmful. We feel things very deeply, and are sensitive souls, but we do not overtly go out of our way to "cry" or "be emotional". The emotional side we have is deep, it's soulful and meaningful and also very authentic... It's not showy or shallow. Thank you so much for showing such care in educating and representing us to a world that largely overlooks and undervalues our type. 🖤
My wife was watching this, and when it was almost over... She laughed, looked up at me, and exclaimed "BUSTED!"
I think you are absolutely right about the "emotional" INFP. This is the best description of me I have ever heard. Not the fragile, whimpering, fragile woke apologist! We are the ones with the guts to stand up to them. Hate that conformity.
As an infp myself, I can completely relate to your analysis and conclusions. It is encouraging, motivating and reassuring to hear some of the more negative stereotypes of this personality type put to rest so deftly. Thanks!
Thank you!
I think that a lot of the misconceptions come from that word "Feeling" in introverted feeling. People assume that this means emotions, lots and lots of emotions. But from my own lived experience, that's not it. Fi is about what feels RIGHT. It's not about histrionics, it's about how to live life properly, how things SHOULD be. Pair that with Ne and you get a person who is constantly examining themselves, and the whole world, from an ethical standpoint. We're idealists, not crybabies. Don't take the those cognitive function labels too literally, 'kay?
I also think that people tend to project their own demons on to other people's strengths. So they look at their own weak Fi, which brings them lots of uncontrolled emotions, and think "well if Infp's have lots of this then they must be constantly wretched." But no that's wrong, of course. Fi is our best function. We're good at this snit. The histrionics happen when YOU try to use your weakest function. I'd be just as wrong if i said that lead Te folks were machiavellian, narcissistic tools. They're not. They're in their zone. But that's what I feel like when I try to use Te. So let's not pretend we understand what it's like when someone has our weakness as their strength.
THIS😭
Fresh out an argument with my mum... And I'm glad I watched this
This is true about emotional displays! I don’t like to show it too much in front of people when I’m upset. Part of it is to not burden people I like, and the other is not to show weakness to people who might take advantage. And I bet a lot of us were bullied.
And about strengthening Te, I was raised by wolves (ENTJ and ESTJ 🤣) so I think that got me to work on my inferior Te MORE than my Si!
Thanks for this! I found it quite spot on. I'm very reserved with my emotions and am known as the level headed one on my family. We INFPs do feel deeply, but in the private of our own souls.
Just some ideas for videos: How each personality type goes with ...each of the other personality type....(its gonna be a long video i guess, but u will figure it out because ur the expert lol) also maybe each personality type and what kind of games they would do in their free time (whether chess and board games or video games)
About your first idea, there are 256 possible combinations and I think each one of them can be a separate video. If he uploads a video like that once a week it would take 5 years to do all of them
True, that's why it was an idea, he can take as much of it as he would like, he can do the best combinations of personalities, he doesnt have to do all of them. I dont know if you got my point though. Thanks for doing the math 😂
It’s funny, because my (I/E)SFP mother is easily emotionally moved, and can cry at the shortest emotional commercial, for instance, and is quite empathetic.
So when she looks at me: who barely ever cries at “real life” emotional stories or movies in general, and tends to handle traumatic situations very calmly-like putting down my dog who I was the closest to, or being the only person present with my dad when he randomly passed out at the barber shop from what was later found out to be from a panic attack, yet I was the calmest person in the room-she usually calls me heartless or stoic when it comes to emotional things.
Yet watch me cry watching some random anime movie, thought of something sad at the grocery store and just the thought of crying in public will make me want to cry, or because I got in a heated argument and couldn’t deal with the anger.
It’s..bizarre lol.
I was very emotional when I was younger, but I have learned to deal with and manage all of my emotions to the point now I almost never cry or get angry. I think the most important advantage of being in touch with your feelings is that you know what you truly want before it happens. This makes life so much easier.
The best way I can describe what being an infp is throwing yourself into your thoughts and iner-world while still being painfully aware of the world around you. It’s kind of a limbo state, between the richness of your thoughts and your surroundings.
Can I just say I LOVE how you have no intro and get straight into it WITHOUT BACKGROUND MUSIC!!!!
I would love to see something like this to the ISFJ, because I feel like they are often displayed as "just nice" but they are way more than that
Married to ISFJ her "niceness" goes very deep along with a full range of other emotions, usually very well concealed.
As an INFP with an interest in philosophy...emotion occurs before thought and is therefore a more truthful way to experience and understand the world. I believe in emotion, not any sort of spirituality or religion.
Love your videos!
When you mentioned having big emotional fluctuations occurs mostly to a thinking type, that's very true! I'm an ENTJ and my boyfriend is an INFP and he always knows how to calm me down and have things under control again. I'm pretty sure most people will think it's the opposite (and i was of of those people until i had an infp bf :D!)
Almost everything you stated was spot on for me. 👌
You were 100% accurate about us. Thank you for doubting those stereotypes.
I prefer to hide my feelings that I'm good at "managing" that's why I rarely get emotional in public, though my feelings run deep. I'm ok with dealing with them on my own.
And yes, I've been working on my Te. It requires a lifetime almost to achieve being closely perfect at it. It obviously doesn't come as natural as it comes to ExTJs and it probably never will. Although not always perfectly organized (a lot depends on whether I'm hydrated or have slept enough) but I wouldn't be able to be in a manager position without it. I'm hard working and self-motivated which are not that typical of us.
Because of those dumb stereotypes I never saw myself as an INFP, but I relate a lot to how you approached those topics
I loved this, I really do connect with everything you said. Especially what you said about organization.
Earlier in my life, I really just “winged it” and for most of highschool, if you looked in my backpack you would just find a jumble of torn and rumpled papers, a book that was five weeks overdue, random pencils at the bottom, etc. just a really disorganized heap. But my grades were always high or low A’s.
I found that learning to organize myself in Senior year was all well and fine, but that was a coping mechanism to deal with a dark time in my life which impacted my grades a lot. I found myself obsessively organizing my life to make up for the mess of my life so that I could maintain my GPA, but as a result when I came out of it, I actually was able to use those skills that were unnatural to me in a healthy way.
I find myself today being a little more disciplined even though it’s not perfect, it’s better than before. I think because we’re so poor at organizing, it’s easy to pick it up and use it if we feel it’s necessary in an aspect of our life.
How much of these stereotypes is learned conditioning & how much is nature. I often wonder, why I am the way I am.
I find this video ressourceful
As an INTJ, i can confirm that my emotions have a lot of fluctuation, and are uncontrolled and unwanted, meanwhile my partner INFP has stable emotions and those are controlled and "wanted" (don't have the right word in mind).
Since english is my 2nd language, i often find that cuts cut the poetic aspect of how you speak, I'd love to see how you really speak. I'd love to see the intent you put into word, or how you stressed sentences naturally.
I suggest you make 2 videos that you'll introduce only to your patreon, one with cuts and the other the same but without, or 30-50% less (without cutting the sonority of the sentence). Then you ask which one do they prefer. After post the one they prefer and see how it turns out. Maybe some will reply the 1st one because they're used to it, but maybe there is a good chance that a lot of people would agree with me.
Because the intent you put into words, the pauses you made, the beauty of your interior language vanished authenticity with a cut. Besides I think you seem like a beautiful person. There is a good chance that people could better see your heart through less cuts. I can be wrong but it worth a try !
Raw and unedited. I like that. Though, being an infp with adhd, I can also appreciate the brevity the cuts afford 🙂
Extremely astute insights! I think you describe INFPs the best out of other youtubers
Well this is certainly fun to hear! I've spend a decent amount of time 'trying' to figure INFPs out so it's nice to know that I'm getting somewhere! Feel free to join our Discord server btw, there are plenty of INFPs on there that you might be able to connect with. The link for it is in the description of most of the videos ~ Nathan
The part about self sufficiency, i love not feeling like I'm a burden on someone, I try so hard to avoid asking anyone for help so I'm always constantly figuring out ways to get things done without doing so