Thank you, six months from when she left, went through three months of a brutal discard before then. I still struggle with the waves of emotions and I still have much to heal from. I’m still on a waiting list for a psychiatrist. But your videos have helped me so much. I have learned a great deal about myself and the toxic traits of my ex-partner of fifteen years.
A psychiatrist is not going to help you,better go a good transpersonal psychologist. And pray deliverance prayers from demons to cleanse yourself,remember narcs are evil forces. You will feel much better after this prayers. I recommend you in you tube rev. Noah Hines he is wonderfull and helped me a lot.
@@skelly0000 I personally was in denial always making reasons or excuses for her actions. It’s difficult with children. Mine are five and still tell me they wished mummy and daddy lived together.
@@sirwin4487i feel ya, specially if we are so empathetic it is so easy to understand or make excuses for their actions … which often invalidates our own experience. Celebrating you find you inner courage and self Love to claim something new for yourself! ❤
Thank you Stephanie for reminding me, one more time, that I'm good enough for myself and that I don't even need anyone to save me. I'm my own mother and father. I'm still working on giving me the love I really deserve but for now I can say I'm proud of being me with all my imperfections.
Great video on an important topic. Narcs attempt to trigger all wounds, they will try to trigger your lack of empowerment on any level, this includes emotional abandonment, but in no way limited to abandonment. They will attempt to trigger any human vulnerability, any time you felt powerless. It could also be attacking your sense of independence, or value and sense of worth. The thing to remember is they are projecting their own wounds on others. Even if they do appear to be callously studying and attacking yours. Narcs live in a bubble, a detached reality from their own deep flaws, they are unable to admit/ face their own wounds or pain.
Interesting. When you mentioned love bombing then ghosting it really resonated. They want to connect briefly, then disconnect. Painful for someone who is dealing with abandonment issues.
Yup she did the detachment/discard thing like it was nothing after 9 years. Just took my heart like it was a rock you'd kick down the street. Absolutely crushed me to where I wanted to end myself. But I didnt.
That’s right brother! She is a lie, and you are valuable to a lot of people. She can’t take away the power you were born with. The only power she has is the power she can take from you and others.
@@HorizonHipHop Keep doin what your doin bro. Like me, there’s nothing to do to fix it, and trying will only lead to my demise. Whether she learns and changes, it can’t matter to you anymore anyways. Besides we deserve so much more.
Thank you Stephanie, this is all becoming so much more clear to the Codependent in me. I’m just starting to learn how codependency has been ruling my life. It’s a long journey that started last year. Thanks again for the reminder❤
Amazing congrats mama, claiming and meeting that co-dependent self is they key to freedom and creating a new reality for yourself. I feel ya!! Ive been on the “dissolving my codependency” tendencies for a few years… and it has helped me to thrive in life! ❤
Thank you so much for sharing this. It is very clear and now I understand even better what happened. I am rational and level-headed woman and went through relationships and breakups, but I could not get my head around why this one hurt so much. I felt inadequate and hysterical. And I didn’t understand why. Because of the way things were done. Going through something like this you HAVE to learn to take care of yourself. Now I am really grateful it happened (AND ended!), that it brought long-forgotten wounds which helped me to connect to myself and to realize that this breakup actually opened up an opportunity to have real and nurturing relationships. Everyone who goes through this pain - hug yourself. Betrayal by someone is a hard thing but betrayal by self is the worst.
Yeah its the fact that they do it so coldly. Like every break up I went through previously wasnt so cold, we were reasonable and gave explanation and room for each other to talk if needed. This one hit different. Made me want to end myself because I was like I did so much for this person but wasn't enough for at least a phone call or an explanation or a sorry if this hurts you, nada.
@@HorizonHipHop I'm glad you didn't end yourself. What doesn't kill us make us stronger. Such trial turns this cliché into lived experience. We can feel and connect with others and will build something real anew, but such people just cannot have it. After period of anger and disgust I really feel compassion now.
@@alinaaleksss I am getting there. Its been 3 months now and I'm starting to climb out of my pit lol. It just hurt a lot. Especially since she left me with our child to raise on my own :\
@@HorizonHipHop Try not to allow thoughts of self-pity and feeling victim take you over. You can give up past regrets for moving towards desired future. And getting rid of the maximum reminders would also help. (Aside of the stuff, I deleted ALL the photos and cannot describe enough how it helped!) Wish you peace and self-compassion. You will get there. Send you a hug.
TY Stephanie! ❤ After walking away from a 39.9 year marriage, it's taken me almost four years to finally start to break away from the years of emotional trauma, abuse, negativity, and betrayal. Your videos have helped me face the true reality of my lifelong relationship with my former husband. When I finally gathered the courage and strength to step away, after being strung along for almost 2 years post betrayal revelation, I thought I was destroying my life and my beautiful family. Thanks to starting therapy and finding your insightful videos, I am able to see the bigger picture. Although much was lost when I finally said, "No more," I now have the ability to see alI that I have gained...Self Respect, Clarity, and Inner Power. Married at 18 and not having parents who modeled a healthy loving relationship, I look back and realize that I tolerated so much emotional abuse because I thought that was what love looked like. Your compassion and knowledge is a gift to all who suffer but finally say, "No more." Your barking doggie made me smile... continued blessings to you and yours! ❤
I so appreciate this information Stephanie. It is helpful to help me navigate with my mom and Ex. I now understand why I attracted either Narcissistic or Emotional unavailable men.
Excellent video. You are an amazing coach and you are helping countless victims of narc abuse. Your advice and real life experiences are making some sense of narc behavior. God bless.
Totally true i am grateful for the narsassit babydaddy through our journey he helped me see and uncover and healy my abandonment wounds/ my daddy issues/ my codependency issues. I am in such a strong space right now after going through 4 years of what seemed like hell with him turned put just to be a challenging inner healing process. The more i did my inner work, the more i took self responsibility and felt my emotions and trauma the more free i became ❤❤❤
You can be trying your hardest to save the marriage, while they are provoking and shaming you directly and in subtle ways.... Just looking for ways to try to make you look like the bad guy and try to justify themselves in leaving a marriage
Yep, same goes for me. You are not alone. They are a lie. They lie to us and they lie to themselves. It’s difficult to understand simplmindedness and no accountability, so we should we should focus on that, being what it is.
So what’s the difference between a narcissist and an avoidant personality disorder? I’m confused because they seem to act pretty much the same. Avoidants takeoff and then they Hoover around and they start calling you again they cheat on you they lie they manipulate. Then I watch on TH-cam about the poor avoidance and their poor bad childhoods,,,Well, hell, we all have bad childhood at some point. Mine was horrid & I don’t treat people like that…
May I answer and say no! From what Stephanie points out, they are so good at twisting the truth, and are so good at manipulating others who might hear something negative, that it won’t do any good.
Ms/Dr(?) Lyn, I enjoy your videos, however, one thing I find very frustrating is you often do not define the terms you’re talking about. We all have our perception of what a narcissist is, for example, but unless we have an accurate definition our perceptions may inaccurate. Other examples of this include: “gaslighting “, “red rock”; etc.
Thank you, six months from when she left, went through three months of a brutal discard before then. I still struggle with the waves of emotions and I still have much to heal from. I’m still on a waiting list for a psychiatrist. But your videos have helped me so much. I have learned a great deal about myself and the toxic traits of my ex-partner of fifteen years.
A psychiatrist is not going to help you,better go a good transpersonal psychologist. And pray deliverance prayers from demons to cleanse yourself,remember narcs are evil forces. You will feel much better after this prayers. I recommend you in you tube rev. Noah Hines he is wonderfull and helped me a lot.
Prayers and Strength 🙏 to you .. wishing nothing but the best for you
@@kimsmith80 Thank you kindly
@@skelly0000 I personally was in denial always making reasons or excuses for her actions. It’s difficult with children. Mine are five and still tell me they wished mummy and daddy lived together.
@@sirwin4487i feel ya, specially if we are so empathetic it is so easy to understand or make excuses for their actions … which often invalidates our own experience. Celebrating you find you inner courage and self Love to claim something new for yourself! ❤
Thank you Stephanie for reminding me, one more time, that I'm good enough for myself and that I don't even need anyone to save me. I'm my own mother and father. I'm still working on giving me the love I really deserve but for now I can say I'm proud of being me with all my imperfections.
Great video on an important topic. Narcs attempt to trigger all wounds, they will try to trigger your lack of empowerment on any level, this includes emotional abandonment, but in no way limited to abandonment. They will attempt to trigger any human vulnerability, any time you felt powerless. It could also be attacking your sense of independence, or value and sense of worth. The thing to remember is they are projecting their own wounds on others. Even if they do appear to be callously studying and attacking yours. Narcs live in a bubble, a detached reality from their own deep flaws, they are unable to admit/ face their own wounds or pain.
Interesting. When you mentioned love bombing then ghosting it really resonated. They want to connect briefly, then disconnect. Painful for someone who is dealing with abandonment issues.
Yup she did the detachment/discard thing like it was nothing after 9 years. Just took my heart like it was a rock you'd kick down the street. Absolutely crushed me to where I wanted to end myself. But I didnt.
That’s right brother! She is a lie, and you are valuable to a lot of people. She can’t take away the power you were born with. The only power she has is the power she can take from you and others.
@@HorizonHipHop Keep doin what your doin bro. Like me, there’s nothing to do to fix it, and trying will only lead to my demise. Whether she learns and changes, it can’t matter to you anymore anyways. Besides we deserve so much more.
@@christopherbrubaker2070 100%
Really sorry I def understand 😢❤
Thank you Stephanie, this is all becoming so much more clear to the Codependent in me. I’m just starting to learn how codependency has been ruling my life. It’s a long journey that started last year.
Thanks again for the reminder❤
Amazing congrats mama, claiming and meeting that co-dependent self is they key to freedom and creating a new reality for yourself. I feel ya!! Ive been on the “dissolving my codependency” tendencies for a few years… and it has helped me to thrive in life! ❤
Any tips?
Thank you so much for sharing this. It is very clear and now I understand even better what happened.
I am rational and level-headed woman and went through relationships and breakups, but I could not get my head around why this one hurt so much. I felt inadequate and hysterical. And I didn’t understand why. Because of the way things were done.
Going through something like this you HAVE to learn to take care of yourself. Now I am really grateful it happened (AND ended!), that it brought long-forgotten wounds which helped me to connect to myself and to realize that this breakup actually opened up an opportunity to have real and nurturing relationships.
Everyone who goes through this pain - hug yourself. Betrayal by someone is a hard thing but betrayal by self is the worst.
Yeah its the fact that they do it so coldly. Like every break up I went through previously wasnt so cold, we were reasonable and gave explanation and room for each other to talk if needed. This one hit different. Made me want to end myself because I was like I did so much for this person but wasn't enough for at least a phone call or an explanation or a sorry if this hurts you, nada.
@@HorizonHipHop I'm glad you didn't end yourself. What doesn't kill us make us stronger. Such trial turns this cliché into lived experience.
We can feel and connect with others and will build something real anew, but such people just cannot have it. After period of anger and disgust I really feel compassion now.
@@alinaaleksss I am getting there. Its been 3 months now and I'm starting to climb out of my pit lol. It just hurt a lot. Especially since she left me with our child to raise on my own :\
@@HorizonHipHop Try not to allow thoughts of self-pity and feeling victim take you over. You can give up past regrets for moving towards desired future.
And getting rid of the maximum reminders would also help. (Aside of the stuff, I deleted ALL the photos and cannot describe enough how it helped!)
Wish you peace and self-compassion. You will get there.
Send you a hug.
@@alinaaleksss yeah I've been boxing up her family photos and her clothes and her paintings. Just cant look at it all anymore.
TY Stephanie! ❤ After walking away from a 39.9 year marriage, it's taken me almost four years to finally start to break away from the years of emotional trauma, abuse, negativity, and betrayal. Your videos have helped me face the true reality of my lifelong relationship with my former husband. When I finally gathered the courage and strength to step away, after being strung along for almost 2 years post betrayal revelation, I thought I was destroying my life and my beautiful family. Thanks to starting therapy and finding your insightful videos, I am able to see the bigger picture. Although much was lost when I finally said, "No more," I now have the ability to see alI that I have gained...Self Respect, Clarity, and Inner Power. Married at 18 and not having parents who modeled a healthy loving relationship, I look back and realize that I tolerated so much emotional abuse because I thought that was what love looked like. Your compassion and knowledge is a gift to all who suffer but finally say, "No more." Your barking doggie made me smile... continued blessings to you and yours! ❤
😊😊
Love protects and guards the vulnerabilities of the other.❤
This is so much of my previous relationship! The Cycle!!!!
This is so true and so deep
I so appreciate this information Stephanie. It is helpful to help me navigate with my mom and Ex. I now understand why I attracted either Narcissistic or Emotional unavailable men.
Excellent! Thank you!
Excellent video. You are an amazing coach and you are helping countless victims of narc abuse. Your advice and real life experiences are making some sense of narc behavior. God bless.
You're wonderful, thank you so much! 🙏
Such helpful practical advice!!! Thank you for helping so many of us! An Angel on Earth! ❤
Thank you!!
This is soooo truer than true!
That fits me, I haven't gotten on track due to my unhealed emotional wounds.
Keep doing your videos ! Each video is a little key, a little piece of our puzzle of life. Thank u Stephanie !
Thank you Steph you don't know how much positive impact you have in the world 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
Thank you for explaining this!
Yep... My narcissist ex wife's family are telling my 2,7 & 9 yr old kids I "abandoned the kids and threw them in the trash."
Thank you so much! 💜
Great video Steph. I love your channel and so grateful for the knowledge. Hope you have a great day.
Totally true i am grateful for the narsassit babydaddy through our journey he helped me see and uncover and healy my abandonment wounds/ my daddy issues/ my codependency issues. I am in such a strong space right now after going through 4 years of what seemed like hell with him turned put just to be a challenging inner healing process. The more i did my inner work, the more i took self responsibility and felt my emotions and trauma the more free i became ❤❤❤
I needed this! Right on point! Thank you so much!
Emotional abandonment
absolutely TREMENDOUS 👍😮
Self parenting! Thank you!
Thank you so much for this eye opening video❤
Thank you for this message!💕
You can be trying your hardest to save the marriage, while they are provoking and shaming you directly and in subtle ways....
Just looking for ways to try to make you look like the bad guy and try to justify themselves in leaving a marriage
Yep, same goes for me. You are not alone. They are a lie. They lie to us and they lie to themselves. It’s difficult to understand simplmindedness and no accountability, so we should we should focus on that, being what it is.
Thank you for your videos 🌈🌈
1:48 lack of connection with another person... Be curious abt what another person is feeling...
Thank you for teaching. ❤
Amazing video thank you! ❤
Only two rules here; no self harm and no harm to others.
Loved the content
So what’s the difference between a narcissist and an avoidant personality disorder? I’m confused because they seem to act pretty much the same. Avoidants takeoff and then they Hoover around and they start calling you again they cheat on you they lie they manipulate. Then I watch on TH-cam about the poor avoidance and their poor bad childhoods,,,Well, hell, we all have bad childhood at some point. Mine was horrid & I don’t treat people like that…
May God bless your efforts and knowledge ma'am.
Quite impressive observation.
The dog was in the back like yesss 😂 lol
Great video Stephanie, thanks for sharing. The self-parenting tips are priceless.
They do❤😊
It's heard to wash it off
Healthy foundation
Is it possible to heal yourself while being in a narcissist relationship to work yourself up to leave?
yes,
Does it help to share the truth about the narcissist with people that know him?
May I answer and say no! From what Stephanie points out, they are so good at twisting the truth, and are so good at manipulating others who might hear something negative, that it won’t do any good.
@@christopherbrubaker2070 thank you for your answer!
@@florevolution3296 your so welcome. I’m right there with ya.
So ucan help me to look for my mom
Well it ok im getting rich I don't need them to bee my drama everyday I reader be alone
Today
Wat wensday?
Life experience from a person
☺🙂
Ms/Dr(?) Lyn, I enjoy your videos, however, one thing I find very frustrating is you often do not define the terms you’re talking about. We all have our perception of what a narcissist is, for example, but unless we have an accurate definition our perceptions may inaccurate. Other examples of this include: “gaslighting “, “red rock”; etc.