Was just watching "....mininimalism changed my life" which you posted about two weeks ago. I am a 68yrs woman and still trying to be a better person in all aspects of my life. I am truly sorry to say I believe with all my heart that instead, I have regressed. I am an emotionally exhausted lesser person. You must now be wondering... what does my TH-cam page have to do with this! Well, a lot. Everything about that posting reflects who you are: mature - you know yourself; giver - you share your ways with others but do not lecture; good mother and wife - you keep a nice-clean-homey house for your husband and children; you really don't care about what others think of your way of life because you know everything you are doing is out of love. Every sentence in that posting had something for me, so, God is using you. But you know that as well... You are intelligent too, an architect, but you don't brag about those things in evry other message. You are a hardworking, fulfilled woman, wife and mother. Thank you so, so much for sharing!
My precious daughter passed away 6 months ago and her words were, less things more experiences, she died at 35yrs old and we are heartbroken to the core but she had a very full life full of fun, and she is now in heaven waiting for us, i too am a minimalist and so i truly love your home its looks very peaceful and so thank you for sharing.
Your daughter was very wise. No doubt you are feeling a lot of heartbreak right now- thank goodness for your faith in knowing you will be reunited once again. Prayers for you and your family! ❤️
Mentioned this before but I think of myself as an Enoughist. Not as any kind of punishment but a real celebration of freedom and the dignity of choice. It started with the discovery of a system called Dressing Your Truth where I donated about 75% of my clothes. Very liberating! Cut the decision fatigue way back. From there the process of letting other things go has lightened the way. This has at times included certain people as well. I am reminded of the old Shaker hymn, ‘Tis A Gift To Be Simple.’ Thanks for the opportunity to check in with you on a weekly basis. Always so refreshing…like a clarifying shampoo for the mind!
Your story is so precious!❤ Yes, I too remember the day I said enough...to me it was really hard letting go of stuff because as a kid, we didnt have much...so, I was pretty much always on panic buying mode😊 Thank you for sharing these precious moments at the cottage.
Thank you for sharing your beautiful home and garden. It brings me such peace, even if it's just for the length of the video. Many years ago I watched an elderly friend pick a few flowers and grasses from her cottage garden (here in the UK) and in a few minutes produce an simple but amazing result. I was fascinated by her being 'in the moment', very unlike my chaotic life at the time. Your videos and philosophy bring me the same serenity.
You’re so welcome Joan, thank you for watching! I understand how busy the days can get - they happen for me too! It feels amazing to be able to connect with the little things, like cutting flowers and raking dirt. It gives my mind peace! ❤️
I think the fact that we 24 years ago lived with the barest of essentials for three months between houses in the end won out over the access I hoarded for many years, as a just in case while having little money, helped by the fact that we downsized a few times starting 15 years ago. The last few years I´ve made a big effort to really declutter and it feels so very good.
This is the third video of yours I’ve watched today. I really identify with you and share so many of your approach to life. I noticed someone else you mentioned their sense of feeling they are and have enough of everything. I see that this inspires one to be a minimalist. Every one of your habits for keeping a tidy and comfortable home are mine also. I am almost 83, a former nurse, midwife and public health professional. I grew up in a large family where money but not love were in short supply. My dear mother worked hard to create a simple, well organized home; so, I learned by example. I enjoy solitude as well as a few deep friendships. One of my friends is always trying new things, furnishings, clothes, jewelry and make-up. She is a wonderful person and always look fabulous; yet, I feel that many of her possessions are a burden to her. We’ve (my husband and I) have had the same lovely Scandinavian furniture for over forty years and still love it. Of course, we’ve added a new comfy chair or replaced many small items over the years. We know what we like and love what we have. I stopped using a cleaning service this year because, in spite of my age, I find that I can do a better job myself-mostly by taking care of small things right away and putting things away, like you, before going to bed. Some of my husband’s choices are not my own, so compromise is necessary. I almost never procrastinate, so hardly ever is any task a big deal. I also love that you insist on being yourself and feel no need to follow every trend. You are someone I really respect. I need to go through your 31 things…..list. Still working on giving away precious, non materialistic items like old family letters and photos. A work in process. Thank you for the service you render. It should help anyone overwhelmed with too much stuff or too many commitments.
Thank you for a wonderful video. I can relate so much to your values and way of life, so full of service and peace. I’m only part way there but you inspire me to keep going 😊
Your videos make me want to keep going with our decluttering. I really want our home to feel as peaceful as your does. I too am someone who is easily overwhelmed and I would like more peace and clarity like you have. Thank you so much for sharing these beautiful videos.❤
Thanks for sharing your story. I love this video, it's encouraging and full of love and understanding, calm and never judging anyone or anything. Your channel is realy a safe haven. ❤
This sounds so funny but I was so happy to see you have a name brand dish detergent I love that brand and was feeling guilty that I wasn't being frugal enough love your channel ❤❤❤
Hoarding is usually attached to a trauma, he needs help to process his trauma. My sister is also married to an hoarder, she alone will not be able to convince him. I did like how it was said to be an example, it could help…but it could make the hoarder fear you are going to start eliminating his precious pile of stuff, which would make it worse for you. I have compassion for how difficult this is for you.
I'm a new subscriber and definitely feel inspired to pursue a more minimalist lifestyle. I don't know where to start! I am currently torn between wanting to get rid of stuff...but also wanting to keep things (like clothes) in order to stop buying new things. I guess I have some decisions to make.
The struggle is real! I would suggest focusing first on the favorites you have (especially in regards to clothing)…maybe even pick a number for yourself - say 10 shirts and 10 bottoms…hang them up in your closet and then just box up and set aside the rest of your clothing. Try living with those sparse items for a while and then you can pull things out of the box to fill in if you need to. ❤️
You have to be ready to declutter. I would declutter once in a great while. I wasn't ready to let go yet. After 2 1/2 years of decluttering, I find it much easier to declutter. Books, clothes, and home decor are my biggest categories. It is about managing my stuff. If I can't manage it, it is gone. I find my apartment easier to manage and clean.
I think the point about endless choices might for me be precisely why eating out (deciding what to eat from a pre made limited menu) is so much easier for me when it comes to “what to eat.” Plus idk. I’ve noticed that smells affect me also. Kind of awakens a desire for eating something similar to what I’m smelling. Almost like I don’t need brain power for that. Just pure instinct. Lol. So ergo at home, you tend to have a wide variety of food Bcuz you’re looking more to plan and store etc. And you don’t smell anything until after you start. At a restaurant you just see the menu and smell the food. You don’t have to go inspect their entire inventory. Lol. And I just really don’t like the entire weight of all of that being on me alone 24/7. I was just trying to comprehend why it’s this way for me so often. But also right? Since it’s just me it might actually make more sense to just plan for a certain amount of dining out and then even just getting out more so that I can at least go “smell” something for more inspiration. Or even just find some way to mimic that at home. I guess right now I’m looking more to eat up what I have for a good while and then maybe just keep less choices around in the future at any one given time. I’m def at a novice level tho when it comes to at home meal planning, cooking, food storage etc. 😅😅 Also just trying to pinpoint when I got the minimalist fever. For me I think it’s more about just a natural evolution that started out with my trauma healing/mental health journey. My main “quest” for a long time has been just that. Whatever keeps me sane and helps me steer my ship to a more healed and healthier place in life. Like most things, I seem to have just “stumbled” upon it one day and it just clicked with me. Mostly it just dawned on me that my possessions and the level of good order in my home affects my mental health way more than I had (until that day) ever realized. I had been doing all this “soul work” for years but until then I had not quite connected the dots with material things and practical, concrete “daily life” things being so closely related to that same mental health journey. Almost like I had been quite disconnected from the physical and biological “earthy” and sensory parts of myself. (I know that prob sounds so crazy. Lol. But I’m so often way too much all up in my head space which might have a lot also to do with it). But then again, trauma effects and how our own brains try to “protect” us very often does have a numbing effect on us, sensory wise, esp when “frozen” for awhile inside of us. (Trauma isn’t just mental. It’s also somatic). So I guess minimalism is really helping me in that area lately. Helping me get my spidey senses back and kind of reconnect all my parts and wiring together instead of being so disconnected and disjointed within myself. Spirit, soul AND BODY. Can’t just constantly ignore 1/3 of your entire being tho. And temporal things need tending to as well. And likely my food struggles are related to that as well. At last I can kind of see a picture forming to comprehend what is meant by the phrase “being whole.” Healing is great but wholeness is next level. Lol. Tried to keep it short. But….ugh. Impossible 😂😂
I find your insight on eating out fascinating and it makes total sense! You’re right that sometimes the smells can help with decision making - and having a limited amount of choices is less overwhelming. Plus, food always tastes better when someone else prepares it, in my opinion. I’m not one who really loves spending time in the kitchen either - which is why I need to meal plan. Also, your note about minimalism helping you get in tune with your senses again is so true! Just being able to slow down and appreciate things more…you notice little details that had been passed by when all you had time for was the managing of ‘stuff’! Our oldest daughter was adopted at 6 1/2, and just the neglect that came from living in an institutionalized setting…I know it changed her sensory processing! She is finally now, 6 years later, starting to become more in tune with her surroundings. Very interesting points…and, I really don’t mind reading long thoughtful comments like the ones you make. ❤️
@@ArrowHillCottage Aw shucks. Thanks! I’m actually tearing up. But that’s good. I FEEL it. I am ALIVE! Lol. I know I can’t really comprehend what it feels like to be a literal orphan in an orphanage and then being transported to a completely diff culture and country. (Although it was pretty shocking to be summarily dumped into such a diff kind of fam than I was ever used to -if it only had been from bad to good like in your case-but I can relate to it just a little bit I think maybe Bcuz it can be such a temp shock to the system). But emotionally some of us are orphans even tho we have “parents.” It’s such a blessing to her to now be in such a stable, loving home. You guys totally rock! It’s very inspiring for me Bcuz it helps me see that God finds ways for such very important things when it seems there is no way. God sends those out who are willing and it makes me feel like God has not forgotten us. (Any precious child who was ever cast aside, abandoned, abused, not loved, rejected, neglected or violated etc). Not at all and not ever. We haven’t “missed out,” we’ve just been delayed a bit. ♥️ ♥️. So, tears of grief can now give way to tears of joy. And now I’m crying like a baby. But in a good way I think. (Checking my sensors right quick). Lol. So when I am fortunate enough to be a witness to anything so profoundly loving like this, I am also blessed through it. It makes me leak through my eyes a bit, (and at times a lot lol), but that’s totally ok. It also helps me see better what God would’ve wanted (for any child-which was a good life in a good home with love) vs what a few messed up humans decided. And just how God is always looking for ways to help us bridge all those gaps. Sending out advocates and ambassadors to be the very hands and feet of God to help someone else. I have to help fix what they broke in me, but God is really the one who does all the heavy lifting and takes care of all the things beyond what I am capable of. Sometimes I be crying and then I just try to find out why. Lol. And maybe my head doesn’t really know why but I try to “rationalize.” But yah. My step father ran it like kind of a “military institution.” Or at times I would feel like it was akin to living under communist rule. Iron fist. Despot like. Harsh. Censored. Double standards. Oppressive. And in some ways it was like a sick cult (loss of personal identity, made to conform, follow the big guru, etc). But even tho I say all that it looked like any other ordinary home in America. So I almost feel hypocritical. But yet it was still very rough and real to me. But I can relate somewhat to the concept of the impersonal, just a number, institutional grind Bcuz they just didn’t care. (Although I guess some might care but the orphanage workers are weary, stretched beyond capacity and spent). But regardless you were just a burdensome extra mouth to have to feed. And they sent messages to me like…. stop whining. You get a roof. You get fed. We pay for all the things. You don’t need anything else. You’re lucky to get that. You should be happy and grateful. Etc. Well you get that at an orphanage also but that doesn’t mean it’s ideal or adequate and nobody there is exactly jumping for joy either. This comment is really way too long already, BUT…lol. In my youth I went to Russia very shortly after their liberation from the USSR (1991). I didn’t have the insight then but as I got older and started working on myself, I saw so much of myself in how the people there were. Just more or less things to do with how it goes after years of oppression. What it does to people. So in short it was like they were now free. Out from under it. And yet all the oppression and brainwashing and such was still very much ingrained inside of them. Freedom is good but you also have to know what to do with it and how to function as a free person when all you’ve ever known is how to function in a world of very restrictive bondage. So it’s so much like you’d need years of “detox” really to ever be able to truly benefit from your new found freedom. Or rather like Shawshank Redemption and the way Red was once he got out. But for me also it was decades of it so it’s taking me me a bit longer than some who weren’t “trapped” in it for so long. So there I will stop with that. Oh Lawd. As the comment grows. Lol. Thank you for bearing with me tho. 😅😅 Well also I try to not forever keep talking about “the past abuse” but it’s just rather like it still affects me to this day and it’s part of the “daily life” extra struggles so then I wind up including it Bcuz it’s just all related from way back then to this very day. (Def I know folks might think I’m just forever whining ha ha. And they prob aren’t comfy hearing too much about the gruesomeness of it all. But oh well. I can’t blame them tho. Not everyone is into horror flicks). Or idk. They may think I’m still crying in my beer in a constant pity party. I’m really not tho. Lol. I’m just learning and at times just kind of frustrated Bcuz at times I feel like the slow kid. Like I’m trying to always catch up. Lol. Learning as in just now connecting the dots I guess. Like oh. I see. This must be why I struggle with that etc. which I think is very helpful when trying to find solutions for it. You can always fix a break or a problem better if you know what precisely caused it. And I actually feel better and more relieved when I can pinpoint the cause of any issue. (I guess a lot like going to the doctor to get a diagnosis. It’s better to know than the misery of forever not knowing even if it’s bad news. Like taking the red pill I guess lol). Your daughter tho is going to have an amazing life story to bless many people with when she grows up. I would bet money on that anyways. Lol. It already is quite amazing even now. 😊
I don’t think you’re whining at all. I think you are on a very inspiring journey of self exploration. And, you are making changes to better your life - if you were only whining and complaining you would keep yourself stuck in the cycle with thoughts of being ‘trapped’ and ‘woah is me…little guy can’t get ahead’. That’s not you. I can tell that you are very much self aware, and heading in a positive direction! Sometimes it is just healing to ‘talk’ about past struggles - to fully appreciate how far we’ve come. And, you’re absolutely right…God has a way of working out all the little details. He cares for the sparrow! ❤️
@@ArrowHillCottage Aw. Thank you again. I do feel a bit “off” socially sometimes (prob not the best boundaries yet and prob TMI at times with over sharing etc) but I know I’m way better off than I could be or used to be. Like right? At least I don’t do crack. 🤣🤣 But def for whatever cosmic reason I’m over here pouring my guts out at times. But I needed to hear that eh? I needed to see that. Even if at first I was just plugging along with the usual minimalist chit chat. Lol. I needed to be reminded all about the little sparrows etc. And so when God decided to hit me right between the eyes with that, I def felt it. And well you know tho. I’m sure as it usually is, whoever God uses its often mutually beneficial. Such as me thinking I’m “helping the Russians” lol. But they were also helping me years later. So maybe it’s all good. Nobody loses or gets drained or shorted in any way when it’s a God engineered win win. And love is the atmosphere where that is more likely to happen. 🥰🥰 So I mean idk. I was just low key attracted to the channel and I’m glad I kept watching. ♥️♥️ Bcuz that’s not the norm for me. I don’t usually find myself writing quite that much or crying (in a good way). So well. And then yah. There was a time that I was angry and kind of estranged from God so this is a very good thing happening inside of me now. Maybe I’m just finally on my way back “home.” (I wrote volumes but it doesn’t really even scratch the surface with what all went down over all those years. But of course most everyone on earth just doesn’t have that kind of time. Lol). I got in the habit of “stream of consciousness” writing in support groups. Heck. We all did. We were all writing huge novels all of a sudden. Lol. And it was good for all of us. That kind of writing really is helpful for sorting out confused thoughts and feelings or even just helping them have some place to go. It was also good in the group for the “airing out of grievances” which was a luxury that was never allowed for many of us. And those things were very accumulated inside of us Bcuz of so much to have to finally “air out.” Lol. I guess I just loved the results so much that I never wanted to go back to just skimming the surface or never talking about any of it. Etc. But now I’m not really needing a “word vomit vent hole” as much so now I’m often still writing a lot about anything and everything. 😅😅 I just try to not “nasty toilet dump” on anyone tho Bcuz that’s not fair to them and would be pretty crappy of me. Lol. And for sure there are really times when it doesn’t matter if anyone ever reads it or replies etc. Sometimes I guess I just need stuff to just hit the air somewhere. Lol. And there is often way more in my journal “phone notes” that nobody will ever see. Lol. Plus anyone who ever does listen, I know they don’t “owe”‘me that. It’s a gift and a gift that I’m grateful for when things do click or when there are at times good dialogue back and forth. But that’s also just kind of random. We all just do what we can when we can and that is totally enough for anyone to give or receive. And you can’t ever dictate from whom or where it comes or how much. It just comes when it comes like waves of the ocean. Plenty and generous and very kind of them. ☺️ And def I know they’ll be rewarded for it as well. Lol. As would I or anyone else.
It's an emotional challenge for me to live with my boyfriend and all his stuff. I cherish minimalism (in every aspect) but he doesn't get it. Anyway, thanks for the inspiration!
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Thanks for watching! I hope you have an amazing day!
Was just watching "....mininimalism changed my life" which you posted about two weeks ago.
I am a 68yrs woman and still trying to be a better person in all aspects of my life. I am truly sorry to say I believe with all my heart that instead, I have regressed. I am an emotionally exhausted lesser person. You must now be wondering... what does my TH-cam page have to do with this! Well, a lot. Everything about that posting reflects who you are: mature - you know yourself; giver - you share your ways with others but do not lecture; good mother and wife - you keep a nice-clean-homey house for your husband and children; you really don't care about what others think of your way of life because you know everything you are doing is out of love.
Every sentence in that posting had something for me, so, God is using you. But you know that as well... You are intelligent too, an architect, but you don't brag about those things in evry other message. You are a hardworking, fulfilled woman, wife and mother. Thank you so, so much for sharing!
My precious daughter passed away 6 months ago and her words were, less things more experiences, she died at 35yrs old and we are heartbroken to the core but she had a very full life full of fun, and she is now in heaven waiting for us, i too am a minimalist and so i truly love your home its looks very peaceful and so thank you for sharing.
Your daughter was very wise. No doubt you are feeling a lot of heartbreak right now- thank goodness for your faith in knowing you will be reunited once again. Prayers for you and your family! ❤️
So sorry for your loss.x
Mentioned this before but I think of myself as an Enoughist. Not as any kind of punishment but a real celebration of freedom and the dignity of choice. It started with the discovery of a system called Dressing Your Truth where I donated about 75% of my clothes. Very liberating! Cut the decision fatigue way back. From there the process of letting other things go has lightened the way. This has at times included certain people as well. I am reminded of the old Shaker hymn, ‘Tis A Gift To Be Simple.’ Thanks for the opportunity to check in with you on a weekly basis. Always so refreshing…like a clarifying shampoo for the mind!
Oh I love that hymn so much! I’ve never heard of ‘dressing your truth’ but it sounds interesting. I’m going to check it out! ❤️
@@ArrowHillCottage The creator of Dressing Your Truth can come across as a bit….intense, but I found her system really works for me.
I think this is one of my favorite videos of yours. You ooze serenity and peace. Thank you !
Oh! Thank you so much! ❤️
Your story is so precious!❤
Yes, I too remember the day I said enough...to me it was really hard letting go of stuff because as a kid, we didnt have much...so, I was pretty much always on panic buying mode😊
Thank you for sharing these precious moments at the cottage.
Thanks for watching! ❤️
Thank you for sharing your beautiful home and garden. It brings me such peace, even if it's just for the length of the video. Many years ago I watched an elderly friend pick a few flowers and grasses from her cottage garden (here in the UK) and in a few minutes produce an simple but amazing result. I was fascinated by her being 'in the moment', very unlike my chaotic life at the time. Your videos and philosophy bring me the same serenity.
You’re so welcome Joan, thank you for watching! I understand how busy the days can get - they happen for me too! It feels amazing to be able to connect with the little things, like cutting flowers and raking dirt. It gives my mind peace! ❤️
I think the fact that we 24 years ago lived with the barest of essentials for three months between houses in the end won out over the access I hoarded for many years, as a just in case while having little money, helped by the fact that we downsized a few times starting 15 years ago. The last few years I´ve made a big effort to really declutter and it feels so very good.
That’s wonderful Monica! I’m happy to hear that you are finding a good balance in your life! ❤️
This is the third video of yours I’ve watched today. I really identify with you and share so many of your approach to life. I noticed someone else you mentioned their sense of feeling they are and have enough of everything. I see that this inspires one to be a minimalist. Every one of your habits for keeping a tidy and comfortable home are mine also. I am almost 83, a former nurse, midwife and public health professional. I grew up in a large family where money but not love were in short supply. My dear mother worked hard to create a simple, well organized home; so, I learned by example. I enjoy solitude as well as a few deep friendships. One of my friends is always trying new things, furnishings, clothes, jewelry and make-up. She is a wonderful person and always look fabulous; yet, I feel that many of her possessions are a burden to her. We’ve (my husband and I) have had the same lovely Scandinavian furniture for over forty years and still love it. Of course, we’ve added a new comfy chair or replaced many small items over the years. We know what we like and love what we have. I stopped using a cleaning service this year because, in spite of my age, I find that I can do a better job myself-mostly by taking care of small things right away and putting things away, like you, before going to bed. Some of my husband’s choices are not my own, so compromise is necessary. I almost never procrastinate, so hardly ever is any task a big deal. I also love that you insist on being yourself and feel no need to follow every trend. You are someone I really respect. I need to go through your 31 things…..list. Still working on giving away precious, non materialistic items like old family letters and photos. A work in process. Thank you for the service you render. It should help anyone overwhelmed with too much stuff or too many commitments.
We are all works in progress for sure! Intentionality and really understanding your own situation is the best thing to do! So great job! ❤️
I sincerely appreciate your ideas, thoughts, and encouragement to live authentically. 😊
Thank you so much! ❤️
You have So Blessed me and I have always been a neat freak. You methods keep me Always on Track. Thankyou Eternally !❤
Hidup dg gaya minimalis adalah hidup dg kegembiraan / semangat
This video is so relaxing to watch! Like a mini vacation. Thank you so much
Awe, thank you! ❤️
Your home looks so cozy and comfy and your garden is gorgeous.
Awe, thanks so much! ❤️
You have reminded me of how simple life should be and how we can easily lose track of what is truly important. Thank you
Thank you for watching! ❤️
Right you are, I have been watching minimalist videos for awhile, and I finally came across your vlog. I love your videos. Thank you for you channel.
Thank you! ❤️
Loved your video ❣️
Thanks so much! ❤️
Thank you for a wonderful video. I can relate so much to your values and way of life, so full of service and peace. I’m only part way there but you inspire me to keep going 😊
Thank you for your kind words Linda! ❤️
Thank you for this stunning video, many key points were presented so well. Lead by example, wait for questions or comments was very helpful. ❤️
Thanks for watching! ❤️
Thanks for sharing!❤ You really motivate me!
Awe, thanks so much! ❤️
Your videos make me want to keep going with our decluttering. I really want our home to feel as peaceful as your does. I too am someone who is easily overwhelmed and I would like more peace and clarity like you have. Thank you so much for sharing these beautiful videos.❤
Thank you so much! Many blessings on your journey! ❤️
Beautiful message ! Thank you for sharing this . 🌼
You’re welcome! Thank you for watching! ❤️
Great video, thank you!
Thanks for watching!!❤️
Spotted on! Thank you for your videos!
Thanks for watching! ❤️
I needed this video for so many reasons. Thank you
Glad it was helpful! Thanks for watching! ❤️
Thanks for sharing your story. I love this video, it's encouraging and full of love and understanding, calm and never judging anyone or anything. Your channel is realy a safe haven. ❤
Thank you! ❤️
This was a very inspiring video. Thank you and God bless you.
Thanks so much for watching! ❤️
This sounds so funny but I was so happy to see you have a name brand dish detergent I love that brand and was feeling guilty that I wasn't being frugal enough love your channel ❤❤❤
Ha! Yeah…I’ve used the same brand of dish soap my entire adult life. I’m kind of used to it - and it works well! ❤️
As a fellow adoptive Momma, I feel this ❤
Absolutely life changing! ❤️
Love this video ❤❤
Thanks so much! ❤️
Great story.!
Thanks for watching! ❤️
Loved this video 😘👍
Thank you! ❤️
My husband is nearly a hoarder. I want, so badly, to minimize but he won’t let go of anything. It makes me sad
That is a very tough circumstance Gwen. My heart goes out to you! ❤️
Hoarding is usually attached to a trauma, he needs help to process his trauma. My sister is also married to an hoarder, she alone will not be able to convince him. I did like how it was said to be an example, it could help…but it could make the hoarder fear you are going to start eliminating his precious pile of stuff, which would make it worse for you.
I have compassion for how difficult this is for you.
I'm a new subscriber and definitely feel inspired to pursue a more minimalist lifestyle. I don't know where to start! I am currently torn between wanting to get rid of stuff...but also wanting to keep things (like clothes) in order to stop buying new things. I guess I have some decisions to make.
The struggle is real! I would suggest focusing first on the favorites you have (especially in regards to clothing)…maybe even pick a number for yourself - say 10 shirts and 10 bottoms…hang them up in your closet and then just box up and set aside the rest of your clothing. Try living with those sparse items for a while and then you can pull things out of the box to fill in if you need to. ❤️
@@ArrowHillCottage Thank you! That is very good advice.
You have to be ready to declutter. I would declutter once in a great while. I wasn't ready to let go yet. After 2 1/2 years of decluttering, I find it much easier to declutter. Books, clothes, and home decor are my biggest categories. It is about managing my stuff. If I can't manage it, it is gone. I find my apartment easier to manage and clean.
This is very true. It has to be your decision! ❤️ great job making a positive change in your life!
I think the point about endless choices might for me be precisely why eating out (deciding what to eat from a pre made limited menu) is so much easier for me when it comes to “what to eat.” Plus idk. I’ve noticed that smells affect me also. Kind of awakens a desire for eating something similar to what I’m smelling. Almost like I don’t need brain power for that. Just pure instinct. Lol. So ergo at home, you tend to have a wide variety of food Bcuz you’re looking more to plan and store etc. And you don’t smell anything until after you start. At a restaurant you just see the menu and smell the food. You don’t have to go inspect their entire inventory. Lol. And I just really don’t like the entire weight of all of that being on me alone 24/7. I was just trying to comprehend why it’s this way for me so often. But also right? Since it’s just me it might actually make more sense to just plan for a certain amount of dining out and then even just getting out more so that I can at least go “smell” something for more inspiration. Or even just find some way to mimic that at home. I guess right now I’m looking more to eat up what I have for a good while and then maybe just keep less choices around in the future at any one given time. I’m def at a novice level tho when it comes to at home meal planning, cooking, food storage etc. 😅😅
Also just trying to pinpoint when I got the minimalist fever. For me I think it’s more about just a natural evolution that started out with my trauma healing/mental health journey. My main “quest” for a long time has been just that. Whatever keeps me sane and helps me steer my ship to a more healed and healthier place in life. Like most things, I seem to have just “stumbled” upon it one day and it just clicked with me. Mostly it just dawned on me that my possessions and the level of good order in my home affects my mental health way more than I had (until that day) ever realized. I had been doing all this “soul work” for years but until then I had not quite connected the dots with material things and practical, concrete “daily life” things being so closely related to that same mental health journey.
Almost like I had been quite disconnected from the physical and biological “earthy” and sensory parts of myself. (I know that prob sounds so crazy. Lol. But I’m so often way too much all up in my head space which might have a lot also to do with it). But then again, trauma effects and how our own brains try to “protect” us very often does have a numbing effect on us, sensory wise, esp when “frozen” for awhile inside of us. (Trauma isn’t just mental. It’s also somatic). So I guess minimalism is really helping me in that area lately. Helping me get my spidey senses back and kind of reconnect all my parts and wiring together instead of being so disconnected and disjointed within myself. Spirit, soul AND BODY. Can’t just constantly ignore 1/3 of your entire being tho. And temporal things need tending to as well. And likely my food struggles are related to that as well. At last I can kind of see a picture forming to comprehend what is meant by the phrase “being whole.” Healing is great but wholeness is next level. Lol.
Tried to keep it short. But….ugh. Impossible 😂😂
I find your insight on eating out fascinating and it makes total sense! You’re right that sometimes the smells can help with decision making - and having a limited amount of choices is less overwhelming. Plus, food always tastes better when someone else prepares it, in my opinion. I’m not one who really loves spending time in the kitchen either - which is why I need to meal plan.
Also, your note about minimalism helping you get in tune with your senses again is so true! Just being able to slow down and appreciate things more…you notice little details that had been passed by when all you had time for was the managing of ‘stuff’!
Our oldest daughter was adopted at 6 1/2, and just the neglect that came from living in an institutionalized setting…I know it changed her sensory processing! She is finally now, 6 years later, starting to become more in tune with her surroundings.
Very interesting points…and, I really don’t mind reading long thoughtful comments like the ones you make. ❤️
@@ArrowHillCottage Aw shucks. Thanks! I’m actually tearing up. But that’s good. I FEEL it. I am ALIVE! Lol. I know I can’t really comprehend what it feels like to be a literal orphan in an orphanage and then being transported to a completely diff culture and country. (Although it was pretty shocking to be summarily dumped into such a diff kind of fam than I was ever used to -if it only had been from bad to good like in your case-but I can relate to it just a little bit I think maybe Bcuz it can be such a temp shock to the system). But emotionally some of us are orphans even tho we have “parents.” It’s such a blessing to her to now be in such a stable, loving home. You guys totally rock! It’s very inspiring for me Bcuz it helps me see that God finds ways for such very important things when it seems there is no way. God sends those out who are willing and it makes me feel like God has not forgotten us. (Any precious child who was ever cast aside, abandoned, abused, not loved, rejected, neglected or violated etc). Not at all and not ever. We haven’t “missed out,” we’ve just been delayed a bit. ♥️
♥️. So, tears of grief can now give way to tears of joy.
And now I’m crying like a baby. But in a good way I think. (Checking my sensors right quick). Lol. So when I am fortunate enough to be a witness to anything so profoundly loving like this, I am also blessed through it. It makes me leak through my eyes a bit, (and at times a lot lol), but that’s totally ok. It also helps me see better what God would’ve wanted (for any child-which was a good life in a good home with love) vs what a few messed up humans decided. And just how God is always looking for ways to help us bridge all those gaps. Sending out advocates and ambassadors to be the very hands and feet of God to help someone else. I have to help fix what they broke in me, but God is really the one who does all the heavy lifting and takes care of all the things beyond what I am capable of.
Sometimes I be crying and then I just try to find out why. Lol. And maybe my head doesn’t really know why but I try to “rationalize.” But yah. My step father ran it like kind of a “military institution.” Or at times I would feel like it was akin to living under communist rule. Iron fist. Despot like. Harsh. Censored. Double standards. Oppressive. And in some ways it was like a sick cult (loss of personal identity, made to conform, follow the big guru, etc). But even tho I say all that it looked like any other ordinary home in America. So I almost feel hypocritical. But yet it was still very rough and real to me. But I can relate somewhat to the concept of the impersonal, just a number, institutional grind Bcuz they just didn’t care. (Although I guess some might care but the orphanage workers are weary, stretched beyond capacity and spent). But regardless you were just a burdensome extra mouth to have to feed. And they sent messages to me like…. stop whining. You get a roof. You get fed. We pay for all the things. You don’t need anything else. You’re lucky to get that. You should be happy and grateful. Etc. Well you get that at an orphanage also but that doesn’t mean it’s ideal or adequate and nobody there is exactly jumping for joy either.
This comment is really way too long already, BUT…lol. In my youth I went to Russia very shortly after their liberation from the USSR (1991). I didn’t have the insight then but as I got older and started working on myself, I saw so much of myself in how the people there were. Just more or less things to do with how it goes after years of oppression. What it does to people. So in short it was like they were now free. Out from under it. And yet all the oppression and brainwashing and such was still very much ingrained inside of them. Freedom is good but you also have to know what to do with it and how to function as a free person when all you’ve ever known is how to function in a world of very restrictive bondage. So it’s so much like you’d need years of “detox” really to ever be able to truly benefit from your new found freedom. Or rather like Shawshank Redemption and the way Red was once he got out. But for me also it was decades of it so it’s taking me me a bit longer than some who weren’t “trapped” in it for so long. So there I will stop with that. Oh Lawd. As the comment grows. Lol. Thank you for bearing with me tho. 😅😅
Well also I try to not forever keep talking about “the past abuse” but it’s just rather like it still affects me to this day and it’s part of the “daily life” extra struggles so then I wind up including it Bcuz it’s just all related from way back then to this very day. (Def I know folks might think I’m just forever whining ha ha. And they prob aren’t comfy hearing too much about the gruesomeness of it all. But oh well. I can’t blame them tho. Not everyone is into horror flicks). Or idk. They may think I’m still crying in my beer in a constant pity party. I’m really not tho. Lol. I’m just learning and at times just kind of frustrated Bcuz at times I feel like the slow kid. Like I’m trying to always catch up. Lol. Learning as in just now connecting the dots I guess. Like oh. I see. This must be why I struggle with that etc. which I think is very helpful when trying to find solutions for it. You can always fix a break or a problem better if you know what precisely caused it. And I actually feel better and more relieved when I can pinpoint the cause of any issue. (I guess a lot like going to the doctor to get a diagnosis. It’s better to know than the misery of forever not knowing even if it’s bad news. Like taking the red pill I guess lol). Your daughter tho is going to have an amazing life story to bless many people with when she grows up. I would bet money on that anyways. Lol. It already is quite amazing even now. 😊
I don’t think you’re whining at all. I think you are on a very inspiring journey of self exploration. And, you are making changes to better your life - if you were only whining and complaining you would keep yourself stuck in the cycle with thoughts of being ‘trapped’ and ‘woah is me…little guy can’t get ahead’. That’s not you. I can tell that you are very much self aware, and heading in a positive direction! Sometimes it is just healing to ‘talk’ about past struggles - to fully appreciate how far we’ve come.
And, you’re absolutely right…God has a way of working out all the little details. He cares for the sparrow!
❤️
@@ArrowHillCottage Aw. Thank you again. I do feel a bit “off” socially sometimes (prob not the best boundaries yet and prob TMI at times with over sharing etc) but I know I’m way better off than I could be or used to be. Like right? At least I don’t do crack. 🤣🤣
But def for whatever cosmic reason I’m over here pouring my guts out at times. But I needed to hear that eh? I needed to see that. Even if at first I was just plugging along with the usual minimalist chit chat. Lol. I needed to be reminded all about the little sparrows etc. And so when God decided to hit me right between the eyes with that, I def felt it. And well you know tho. I’m sure as it usually is, whoever God uses its often mutually beneficial. Such as me thinking I’m “helping the Russians” lol. But they were also helping me years later. So maybe it’s all good. Nobody loses or gets drained or shorted in any way when it’s a God engineered win win. And love is the atmosphere where that is more likely to happen. 🥰🥰 So I mean idk. I was just low key attracted to the channel and I’m glad I kept watching. ♥️♥️ Bcuz that’s not the norm for me. I don’t usually find myself writing quite that much or crying (in a good way). So well. And then yah. There was a time that I was angry and kind of estranged from God so this is a very good thing happening inside of me now. Maybe I’m just finally on my way back “home.” (I wrote volumes but it doesn’t really even scratch the surface with what all went down over all those years. But of course most everyone on earth just doesn’t have that kind of time. Lol).
I got in the habit of “stream of consciousness” writing in support groups. Heck. We all did. We were all writing huge novels all of a sudden. Lol. And it was good for all of us. That kind of writing really is helpful for sorting out confused thoughts and feelings or even just helping them have some place to go. It was also good in the group for the “airing out of grievances” which was a luxury that was never allowed for many of us. And those things were very accumulated inside of us Bcuz of so much to have to finally “air out.” Lol. I guess I just loved the results so much that I never wanted to go back to just skimming the surface or never talking about any of it. Etc. But now I’m not really needing a “word vomit vent hole” as much so now I’m often still writing a lot about anything and everything. 😅😅 I just try to not “nasty toilet dump” on anyone tho Bcuz that’s not fair to them and would be pretty crappy of me. Lol.
And for sure there are really times when it doesn’t matter if anyone ever reads it or replies etc. Sometimes I guess I just need stuff to just hit the air somewhere. Lol. And there is often way more in my journal “phone notes” that nobody will ever see. Lol. Plus anyone who ever does listen, I know they don’t “owe”‘me that. It’s a gift and a gift that I’m grateful for when things do click or when there are at times good dialogue back and forth. But that’s also just kind of random. We all just do what we can when we can and that is totally enough for anyone to give or receive. And you can’t ever dictate from whom or where it comes or how much. It just comes when it comes like waves of the ocean. Plenty and generous and very kind of them. ☺️ And def I know they’ll be rewarded for it as well. Lol. As would I or anyone else.
You can use me as your ‘sounding board’ for your thoughts any time! ❤️
499 like very nice video 💯☕👍🙋🏻♀️
Thank you! ❤️
It's an emotional challenge for me to live with my boyfriend and all his stuff. I cherish minimalism (in every aspect) but he doesn't get it. Anyway, thanks for the inspiration!
I can imagine that is really tough. ❤️