I raised 3 boys. Vocational classes in high school helped my boys the most. They got out of high school with skills to continue in a viable career and actually continue to community college for an associate degree and now are quite successful, happy and making a good salary. Why do we think high school is just to prepare every kid for a 4 year college? How about a successful life! Thanks for the great interview!
Great point. What happened to the vocational education stream vs. the academic college stream of yesteryear? Not all young people want or are suited for the college route. Nor does that even meet the countries needs for skilled workers in so many areas.
Don’t forget that the Republicans are the ones who destroyed the working middle class by union busting and their trickle down economic theory which lets rich people hoard the money. The GOP doesn’t care about working class people. Vote Democrat!
The lack of any vocational training is a huge negative for many boys. I went to elementary school with a boy who wasn't academically inclined but he was skilled at building things. He learned photography by age 11. He built a contact printer. But at school he was considered stupid.
Girls can relate to this too. It's about the way we think and process and do things. We can't all fit into this one narrow little funnel of education. There needs to be more respect for the makers and doers of the world.
I like making things too, and would have enjoyed more industrial arts training. Girls just weren't being steered in that direction at that time, and now it's amazing when schools still have access to trade programs. Definitely more an exception than a norm in a lot of places.
yes, we need to use our tech to id skills and focus practical pathways earlier ... silicon valley has only used to tech to manipulate us and addict our kids .... yeah, thanks zuck and bozos ... sickos
I was a teacher; men don’t put up with degradation which is what teaching has become after the reforms and budget cuts and charter/private businesses had their way with my profession
I think part of the reason is because it’s a female dominated profession and therefore not valued or respected. It’s sexism. I have no doubt that if teaching was a male dominated profession it would’ve been valued much more with good pay and more resources.
As a father of young children; I can’t responsibly take any employment other than the highest paying employment I can find. There are lots of careers I would love to do, teaching is one of them, but that’s just a dream when the (vast) majority of the family’s financial burden falls on me. My wife is intelligent and educated, but childcare is so incredibly expensive that most of the money from her work would go to that. Not to mention that our cities are designed around cars, not people, so driving the kids to the places they need to go (or just driving to work) takes all day. Since our society isn’t just not made for raising children, but is aggressively anti-child, one of us takes a huge, irreversible career hit and the other is trapped on the most productive treadmill they can find.
@@chrisoffersen That’s life in ‘Murica, the country that’s terrible at everything. If there’s any possible way to pull it off I recommend raising your children in an actual civilized first world country where the needs of families are valued. There’s no hope otherwise if you’re not wealthy, you will always struggle with unnecessary obstacles here.
@@rlud304 This is the most unhelpful comment. 330 million people are supposed to move to another country to raise their children? Not only is this not possible, but the poorest of them would inevitably be stuck here. America has big problems, but that doesn't make it a hopeless place to be. There are solutions if we don't run away.
I recently saw an African proverb which I think describes our situation perfectly: "If the youth are not initiated, they will burn down the village." Our young men are in trouble and no-one seems to know what to do, so at least a book and conversation like this should be appreciated. I would also point people to small global non-profit organizations like Illuman which are forming around the world to "help men become healthier, more authentic men." One of their signature events is a Men's Rite of Passage - "That helps awaken men to the adventure and mystery of their own masculinity, their deep spirituality, and their potential for leadership." We need more of that type of formation for our young men who are lost and broken. Only men can heal men.
I've been a lawyer for 39 years and have practiced varied kinds of cases. A great proportion of the problems can be traced to a lack of strength of character, mostly in men This affects marriage, parenting, finances, criminal and other unethical activities. That affects all their relationships, which affects others around them, especially their children
Having been a mother of a son and having been a teacher of plenty of boys and young men, I saw the psychological affects of bias against boisterous boys, etc., but I disagree that it was because of a missing rite of passage or masculinity squashing. I think it is precisely that culture that has trapped boys, young men, and older men into thinking they’ve failed at being “men.” We need a culture that allows men to be normal humans, a culture that doesn’t attach their masculinity to their success.
Although I agree with your last sentence, I disagree about masculinity squashing. I don't think it's intended, but forcing young boys to sit all day long IS masculinity squashing.
*"We need a culture that allows men to be normal humans, a culture that doesn’t attach their masculinity to their success."* - Maybe this is part of *_*a*_* solution, but I don't think it's one for the problem raised by the author. We need to invest in our boys as much as we do our girls--this isn't what he said directly but I think it better addresses the problem he laid out than teaching boys that masculinity isn't tied to success. tl;dr there's nothing wrong with emphasising the lack of direct correlation between masculinity and success, but it in no way will help boys achieve parity in education with girls--if we want parity then we need more male teachers and more programs designed for the needs of boys...similar initiatives to what we have for girls.
@@ajmeyers5661 I hope you also heard who are the boys who are mostly in trouble: minority and lower working class boys. Maybe extending the child tax credit and mandatory pre-school could help. Guess who is against it? Maybe funding schools with something other than property taxes.
@@wizarddragon - Look at this comment section for evidence that your fears are being realised. Bad faith actors lined up within minutes of its posting to try and metaphorically shout down the arguments being discussed. Some of them are bots and trolls trying to stir up controversy, but not all. And the reaction to the backlash against the author has included some manosphere trolls and kooky MRAs. I wouldn't at all be surprised to find out the author has received death threats, judging by some of the unhinged comments posted here
Interestingly…10 years ago my struggling 3rd grade white son’s education experience was more or less rescued in-part by a very talented, patient yet firm Black male 3rd grade teacher who he really connected with.
@Joseph Huether - That seems to line up precisely with the author's conclusion. Anecdotes aren't evidence, but gather enough of them and it's no longer anecdotal. Thanks for sharing this
Poorer men keep supporting those richer men who are squeezing them. We keep trying to tell them its not serving them, but are ignored and railed against
@katherine savarese *"Poorer men keep supporting those richer men who are squeezing them."* - 53% of white women supported Trump...both times. We're looking at a bigger problem than "poor white men dumb". imo it's a class issue, not a gender issue.
Quite frankly, when my daughter expressed a desire to become a teacher, my response was, no. She is now a successful attorney. Teachers require more respect and higher wages in high schools and below simply to make ends meet.
A huge reason men don't get into teaching is it is so poorly paid for the educational requirements. Men who do enter often quickly get into the higher paid administration roles. As far as college education, there are very few reasonably paid jobs realistically open to women which don't require at least some college. Men still completely dominate most of the trades (electrician, plumber, mechanic, etc), so a lot more of them decide to go that route instead of college.
Right. College isn't the best way for everyone to get ahead. Gotta look at your skillset and match it there. I have a Doctorate and many truck drivers make more than me. I had to wait 8 years to start earning not that I didn't work through college, but a tradesman was earning at 18. So now your $100K in the hole if you're lucky while your skilled trade counterpart has been earning for 8 years. Call it $40K on average and you are 26 and $420,000 in the hole in net earnings. Good luck college grad.
@@SLCSStrengthCoach I learned HVAC from my father and combined it with an electrical engineering degree to get into building automation. I’m currently making over 6 figures and I can easily demand more raises even in a recession because there is such a major shortage of people with my hybrid expertise. I was literally too smart to stay in academia. Graduated with a 3.9 gpa from the 9th ranked EE program in the world.
Trades are the way to go because that’s the future people are always going to need plumbers, electrician, handyman while if we can’t even get a handyman they are making six figures and up. They are so in demand.
I am a man who quit teaching because of a hostile work environment where I was called a f*gg*t, groomer, and pedophile... I was dismissed and gaslit by the union rep, HR, and administration. I was put in a closet where I was just doing clerical work because I "wasn't respecting others opinions and beliefs". Most people have abandoned reason and rationality. Unfortunately, people believe men are sexual predators and this bias creates hostile work environments for men around youth.
@@jl8942 I hear you my man. I have been teaching 20 years and have seen some of the same things. I have not been called those names, but I have seen the incessant push to promote (be an ally of) others beliefs which run counter to my values. I have about 15 years left to go before I can retire, and I am truly worried that I will be forced to leave my calling, not because I'm not a good teacher, but because I will be forced to compromise my principles one too many times.
My dad was a high school biology/science teacher, and when I was considering a career in science he warned me away from teaching. My mom was a teacher too (elementary music), so to some extent I gravitated toward teaching. He told stories of belligerent administrators, shamefully disrespectful students, mis-allocation of limited resources (new sports facility, but science books that were literally falling apart), administrators who changed grades upwards to meet quotas/benchmarks or stating that no student can fail and everyone must get at least a C, and parents who blamed teachers for Little Precious' failure to turn in assignments or failing tests. So I got my BS in geology with a math minor, and then a MS in hydrogeology and went to work for a Fortune 500 engineering firm as an environmental scientist. I still think of how much I'd have liked to teach, but then discuss the issues with friends that are teachers who describe work conditions that are *much* worse than what my dad described AND low pay.
@HydroAC I'd like to see more people like you go into teaching in semi-retirement. With your real world experience you'd be an asset and example for kids, and with emotional and financial stability you'd be somewhat insulated from the administrative crap. Unfortunately teaching can't attract many best and brightest because of the hassle and low salary, so most teachers are rather average with little life experience gained before their teacher/administrator careers.
I am also in education and everything your dad said is true. Still, despite falling standards and administrative blundering, I have enjoyed every moment I have had in enhancing the lives of these kids. I am a bit of a fossil hound and geology nut myself and have had some wonderful experiences introducing elementary kids to the world around them. Money isn't everything. In fact, it is largely meaningless in the grander scale of things. Helping millionaires find oil isn't what I'd call a life pursuit.
I thought of going for my MS in hydrogeology. I’m just bothered by the fracking industry which is where I’m seeing the jobs. Plus I’m a woman and I’m 53 so I’ve got two things that would weigh against me as a candidate. It is likely I would be saddled with more college debt that I can’t afford to pay. I have yet to be hired in any related field with just my B.S in Environmental Science. Graduated in 2014.
@Peter from NZ It is a side effect of a culture under-valuing intellect and education in general. No teacher takes it on as second full-time job. It is a chosen career. I know many teachers who work a second job to make ends meet. Sad commentary at a time when curiosity and intelligence are so needed. Politicians and administrators have made a mockery of the teaching profession. Teachers are now props in the imaginary culture wars, a position they never imagined themselves in.
By the time the powers get around to admitting it and start to try and turn it around it will be too late. Then we can gleefully sit back and watch the world burn!😂
Yup, it's the kindling of revolution and regime change. All it takes is enough generations of boys and men struggling like this and a trailblazer or charismatic populist and it's a wrap.
A problem for society and women but not for men. Not a new issue merely a newly noticed one. There's a graph, showing a nearly perfect straight line drop in mens labor participation rates from 98% in 1950 to 89% about a year or two ago. The graph shows this number drops by about the same percentage every year almost exactly. Men are slowly figuring out that they really don't need society. THAT is the problem.
Coming from Germany, living in the US, I am very surprised at how society disadvantages women in the US. One always points to the education system as a beacon of female empowerment when actually a critical factor is financial support, social and healthcare support and employment security for women during maternity. The US is extremely underdeveloped in this area compared to many European countries.
They say men are disadvantaged here, but they're not, American men are the biggest babies on the planet. We have a slogan, "boys will be boys" to basically excuse how mentally incapable and weak they are from birth. If they had athletic ability they were passed through English and Math. If they could pay, the big important schools which just give them the degrees if they had the right alumni. The higher up you go in America, the dumber the men get. Most companies are run by the Father's idiot offspring that never deserve the job or title. Now in America, when women find out it's a boy, they abort it. We have a current song that says, why give birth to that which destroys you. They've also showed us how the wars didn't go like they said, so American men have NEVER been all that. Alfred Hitchcock produced our war reels with blow up tanks in many instances. You know what men brought home from the war, documented by the tens of thousands, stds. Yup, that's what they brought home to their wives. There are so many assault babies in France by American men they have an assault American war baby fund as abortion back then illegal. Start looking into the medical and financial records of the wars. If it's not beer, football, porn, guns, watching themselves lift weights in a mirror, video games or violence, then nothing men do in America will interest you. Now men and women are really at war here, they want to force breed us again. Doing away with legal age to marry in many states, but still have to birth the baby even if raped. You can see the writing on the wall with that one.
@@juliebella1221 you are not going to make the world a better place with that extreme antisocial view. Too often weak minds make this about a war of the sexes. Do you have sons and daughters, a father and mother? You should realize that disadvantages for women is not good for fathers, husbands or sons either. We need to make things better together, not fuel a divide
@@dickelstephen Too late. Generations of women are leaving men from young to old. Should've seen all the Grams watch Roe get turned over. They were all like just don't bother with men anymore. They never listen to us. We already fought this fight and here we are again. Men aren't even in our life plans anymore. We buy our houses in our twenties all by ourselves and call it a day. Every girl, woman or wife I've EVER spoke to all say they fake it as the dudes ego too fragile to know how bad he is in bed and they get themselves to oh lala. Third world countries wait for failed American men to show. It's not just me who knows this. Go to TJ and see your men in uniform in action. Or anywhere an American military base is. If a group of women or girls was walking towards you vs a group of boys or men walking towards you, you would be less wary of the group of women. Fact. Men themselves are wary of other men. Why men afraid of prison? Other men. Animal nor human feels safe around men. Fact.
Surprise! Mentorship from someone you identify with will help more than everything else you can throw at a growth. If we want to live in a world that includes everyone, people need to be nurtured to discover themselves - usually by someone they can actually admire and respect. Looks like a good book and I have a son, so I am going for it!
Great comment. I have read several dozen excellent ones under this video, all good, but this is among the very best IMHO! In my own life experience, and from listening to others over the years (I'm in my mid-60s), mentorship seems to make a vast difference -- not just in practical terms (economic success later on, etc.) but also in psycho-social terms and psycho-spiritual development. To become a whole and healthy person, who can connect and relate well to others. And to recognize and stay away from evil influences, such as pornography and illicit drugs / smoking, etc. Saying no to the bad stuff is important too. Back in earlier decades, there used to be classroom films made and shown in school, with practical instruction. Example: some of them would include warnings about "Stranger Danger". Another form of very helpful media, IMHO, is the educator Fred Rogers (1928 - 2003). He was the creator of the children's television show "Mister Rogers' Neighborhood", which I wish was more widely shown and proliferated (i.e., more available for ordinary children to watch nowadays). For what it's worth, following is one exception to that. It can be accessed by either clicking on the link below, ... or else through doing an Internet search of: watch full length episodes of mr rogers' neighborhood and selecting one of the first Google results (returns) offered. If interested, here is my attempt to share a link: www.misterrogers.org/watch/ In my own observations, "video games" are another peril, for young men especially. They are addictive, and fostered by an evil industry (much like porn). Leads to mind rot, and a wasted life. It's brought about the ruin of many a young man.
I’m feeling like this should maybe be broken down differently to get to the real truth. For example, completely separate the genders. Compare the boys of today with the boys of 60, 40, and/or 20 years ago. Is it possible that the boys have actually stayed the same, while the girls are finally allowed to live, learn and earn up to the ability that they always had but were prevented from fulfilling?
The issue is developmental age: When boys and girls are in the same grade at the same calendar age, some of the boys are effectively younger in terms of maturity, brain, executive function, ability to handle challenges, etc.
Why would that change young men though? Young men have no direction in life today because the mainstream feminist narrative teaches us its toxic for young boys to do traditionally masculine things.
@@dragonbeardable Please describe a traditionally masculine behavior that you would consider healthy that you observe being called toxic. I can point to lists of toxic masculinity and healthy masculinity, but I want to see where we diverge or converge. This can be enlightening.
Time well spent listening to this. Thank you for bringing us this and the recent Scott Galloway interview about his book "Adrift: America in 100 charts". The theses of these two books together tells us that America (and the UK) is in big trouble. Politicians & journalists need to get serious and stop behaving like society is a circus where we can indulge the clowns and the archetype 'evil genius'. Things are falling apart and if the grown ups don't take charge soon the rot will be terminal.
It's already too late to change the trajectory I'm afraid. Thinking realistically about the Future that we're in Now. The struggles for power. Whose vision of the future are we in right now?
@dominicesteban rice *"Politicians & journalists need to get serious and stop behaving like society is a circus where we can indulge the clowns and the archetype 'evil genius'."* - Well said, but there is a third group--just as complicit--that sometimes goes overlooked here: the people. Murdoch has an empire because people buy his culture-war bs, tailor made for them. Trump and BoJo's power comes from their loyal followers. In a world where Liz Truss, Reese-Mogg, Donald Trump, and Mitch McConnell are seen as "of the people", we are totally screwed.
I have noticed in my family that our young men are struggling more than women and wondered why. I hope these suggestions can be used to improve their lives
*Dating was always hard for men cause women are hypergamous, they date upwards with age & statu$, men date downwards* . Social media made things a lot harder cause women get an *insane* amount of attention & validation to the point they're *pedestalize* & believe they're special. They're even getting flown out to hang out with celebrities & experience luxury lifestyles...Men are a lot more feminine cause they were raised in single mother households. Some are lazy who play video games & smoke weed all day. They also waste time *simpin* over women on the internet. Feminism has caused a lot of damage too (some women are regretting it now)...What the manosphere/redpill does is motivate men to get their shit together & *build themselves up* . Whether it's with finances, fitness, status, etc. They also help men with *understanding* women nature, cause women are sophisticated creatures
There are other factors. Social media, pressures around body image, coupled with either an absent or emotionally stunted father all have massive impact. Teaching your boys critical thinking (especially around advertising), problem solving, rough and tumble and controlling or channeling your strength and the ability to acknowledge you were wrong and to apologize and make it right are all so hugely important. That, and getting them help external to the school system (which lets be honest doesn't cover all the bases for those who struggle). Give them the tools that will enable resiliency, self-worth and to take on the challenges in life.
Your last sentence speaks volumes. Without those abilities and skills in life, many will resort to becoming a bully at work, home, and in social settings.
I agree with every thing you said. The most important thing in all of this is having healthy parents/caregivers and that goes for everybody regardless of gender. In a healthy home people will get the tools necessary to do well in the world most importantly having healthy self esteem and boundaries and everything else that comes from the most important teachers in everybody's life, their caregivers.
For me at least I feel that having witnessed all the hallmarks of adulthood that my parents achieved be denied to me has left me feeling like a failure. Can't have a family if you can't support them. Can't get ahead because we're stuck renting most jobs don't pay enough to survive let alone get ahead. There is no ladder to climb anymore. You either win the birth lottery or you struggle and die.
@@erinh9267 The difference is that for low-income potential females, relying on hypergamy to compensate for that dilution in economic outlook is considered normal and expected. But the same Hypergamy-seeking coming from a low-income male is considered off-putting and summarily laughed out the building by the female cohort. Misandry run amok.
@@erinh9267 He didn't say anything about his experience being rooted in his gender, yet you read it that way. Why? It seems obvious his comment was meant to encompass all young people in a similar situation. Is there something you're picking up on here that I missed?
@@JeffCaplan313 If boys and men were more emotionally intelligent, they would be better leaders. Girls and women would be of a totally different mind set.
Emotional intelligence is what an English Major would call an "oxymoron", meaning two contradictory words put together. Emotional intelligence is essentially an attempt to validate a less valuable trait commonly held by women and also turn little boys into little girls. It has no real relevance, only for itself and it's benefactors.
@@chocolaza If girls and women were more accountable for their actions, you wouldn't be blaming men. But perhaps it's time for the world to acknowledge that women have less free will than men. That women ARE lesser than men. Is that the kind of emotional intelligence you're looking for?
@@professordogwood8985 being intelligent and understanding of all sides of your person doesn't equate turning boys I to 'little' (?) girls. Put the same AMT of input to both have come to where we are. Thankfully. Women and girls have always been less than, so this is far overdue. We are separate, yes, but also equal. Yes.
It bothers me that the lowest level of "higher education" is a 4 year degree. Trade schools exist, and they churn out quality plumbers, electricians, carpenters etc. every day, most of whom are men. The reality is higher education is not as important anymore. I don't understand why we care so much if not as many men know the difference between a conjunctive and an adjective. We have too many teachers and writers and journalists and marketers and not enough tradesmen. Which is why everyone who goes to a 2 year school trade school that I know is earning as much or more than people who got a "higher education", and they did it in half the time and with less than half the debt.. I agree with this guy that men struggle more in school, but that is only true when it comes to traditional education, not vocational education.
The skilled trades are not only in high demand and pay well but they cannot be outsourced. Thank you for bringing up the fact that a college education isn't always needed to live a good middle class lifestyle
We are just so far behind other countries who offer a great focus on the trades. Boys and some women who tend to be more tactile/kinesthetic learners and thrive in work and learning situations which are three dimensional and hands on- This is going to be a problem for our economy and is definitely leading to the mental health issues and aggression we might see in men and boys
@Random Old Lady - The idea of different learning styles has fallen out of favour in modern education theory. I'm not saying this is a good or bad thing: I'm neutral on the topic, honestly. Many US state curricula still push it, but researchers are trending away from it. There's some interesting reading online if you're keen.
I appreciate his insights, and think there is indeed a problem, but how is the fact that women start falling behind when they have children considered NOT a gender issue? It's not exactly the same kind of gender discrimination we saw in the 1950s, but it's obviously a type of gender discrimination. What a strange way for him to frame the issue. The modern workplace is obviously designed to prioritize the interests of men.
@@rickysoulless6534 who pays for the childcare while she works ? Who watches the children? No one ever considers that this cost falls on women. Even with a father that pays child support ,women are still the ones put at a disadvantage because they make less overall and then they have to pay for childcare when they go to work. The doctors appointments for children? The days off needed to attend to things in the child’s life fall on women. It takes two incomes to survive.
@@cstuartdc it takes two full time salaries and then some to support just two people, you are not considering the cost of childcare. It’s not possible when you have to pay for childcare for one of the full time workers who already makes less then the man. This is math that anyone in this situation can do. Apparently you have never had to do this math,
@@rickysoulless6534 see… I stopped reading after you made it sound like a choice. It’s the “if she decides to have a child” part. The government says you must cultivate a baby! No more choices! Oh ok. Gender discrimination is a hoax and the suffragettes and civil rights leaders were all faking it too! Do you know how insulting that is? Women died just to have the right to choose. Women died to have the right to vote. But yea….it’s all a hoax because you found some stats that fit your narrative of “women are paid the same”
@@rickysoulless6534 also, women are barely “present in the room.” That’s why only 20% of congress is female. But yea….there is no discrimination going on! Pure fiction! Men would never try to keep women out! Hahahahaha! They do it all the time genius! I know you hear it and see the derogatory language and inability to even acknowledge a woman when she speaks within a group of men! It happens so much that if you are not aware of it by now than you are a participant and part of the problem.
My dad was dyslexic and enrolled in a technical high school in the 1930s where he learned a myriad of skills that served him all his life and allowed him to make a good living and have self respect. Over the years educational systems removed teaching technical skills and with the demise of unions over the years there were few opportunities to learn carpentry, plumbing, electrical skills, etc on the job. Our labor workforce with these skills is aging with few younger people to take their place. No wonder young people are discouraged and angry
This analysis has to go deeper. Something IS going on with boys and men. They are being less successful than they have been in the past. I believe their frustration with this can be seen in the increased level of violence, particularly gun violence, that we see in society today. It’s not just that boys are achieving less academically, it is that their role models- the image of the “successful male” have changed. It’s no longer the well-schooled individual, who is now considered to be elitist or effeminate, who is admired; it is the “Rambo” man of action. The truth is that boys need better role models in ALL levels of our society beyond just placing men in the classroom. While I agree that we want every person in society to be successful, I feel that this assessment will be interpreted by many that boys are failing because girls have been accommodated and received “special privileges” that boys have not gotten. The answer, for these folks then, would be to change society back to what it once was… repressive to women.
But were men really more successful in the past? Most men still seemed depressed and empty in the past and even with a job and higher income. And I think part of the problem is men are taught success is money, attractive partners and power. Those are really empty and superficial values and the ones who I have seen achieved that "success" are still negative, toxic and depressed.
Agree that the “solution” is nuanced Policymakers and interest groups with rigid agendas don’t do well at nuance (see: current conservative wars against everything) It’s hard to push against culture norms and I think we already see in social sphere a backlash against the gains made by women. The relationship politics I see have become pretty toxic and scary for singles, for example.
Towanda *"This analysis has to go deeper."* - I think this is only fair to say *_*if*_* you've read the book. Otherwise we have no way of knowing how deep the analysis goes. Interviews like this only hit the high points and/or a few select issues the interviewer is interested in exploring.
@@erinh9267 - You're correct, but these are internet keyboard warriors you're dealing with. This isn't a data driven discussion: it's an emotive one. Bringing up the fact that violence has been on a steady decline doesn't "feel" true. Here's an exchange betwen Alysin Camerota and Newt Gingrich from 2016 that I find endlessly fascinating: CAMEROTA: But violent crime across the country is down. We're not under siege in the way that we were in say, the 80s. GINGRICH: The average American, looking at Dallas policemen -- and look at the states he listed. The Average American, I will bet you this morning, does not think crime is down, does not think they are safer. CAMEROTA: But we are safer, and it is down. GINGRICH: No, that's your view. CAMEROTA: It's a fact. GINGRICH: I just -- no. But what I said is also a fact. The average American feels -- when you can walk into a nightclub and get killed, when you can go to a party in a county government building and get killed, people don't think that their government is protecting them. When you have Baltimore, when you have policemen ambushed in Dallas -- your view, I understand your view. The current view is that liberals have a whole set of statistics which theoretically may be right, but it's not where human beings are. People are frightened. People feel that their government has abandoned them. 25 million Americans have dropped out of the middle class, according to Gallup. CAMEROTA: Yes, well that's the economic figures that you're saying, though, unemployment has ticked down. But what you're saying is -- but hold on, Mr. Speaker, because you're saying liberals use these numbers, they use this sort of magic math. This is the FBI statistics. They're not a liberal organization. GINGRICH: No, but what I said is equally true. People feel it. CAMEROTA: They feel it, yes, but the facts don't support it. GINGRICH: As a political candidate, I'll go with how people feel and I'll let you go with the theoriticians.
I'm pleased the following concept got a passing mention near the middle, but one thing that always strikes me is how time gets ignored in gender politics. One of the big reasons that there are still fewer women at the mentioned elite echelons is that reaching that level requires a 30-year career, meaning you're drawing from the demographics of people who were at college in the late 1980s. This is also why it's important to address men's issues now, because the impacts don't play out immediately - they will appear in various ways over the next 40+ years as the current generation age.
Well, it would be a marvellous change if rhe reverse situation will happen and women dominate that high echelons like man does nowadsys (and always have done) But i don't know if it will never happen there is Putin, Erdogan and other neanderthal bringing back again the importance of man trough war. In my country (Spain) Never still a woman prime minister. And in your country Hillary also didn't achieve the work. As a change would be nice if your prediction would be true. (and i'm one heterosexual man over 50 by the way not a woman) But i consider man rule have demostrated thorougly his incompetence if we want a peaceful thriving surviving world
The last 50 years have nothing to do with it. White Men have been in control since the beginning of time, no matter how incompetent. There is a glass ceiling they will not allow women to move beyond. The current level of corporate and government, across all ages, is still male-dominated. Women have been the majority of teachers in lower education for decades, but men have always dominated higher education, meaning nothing will change. Men's egos are too fragile to allow women to succeed, even though women excel. Men's salaries have not declined. Women's salaries have risen, but never to the degree that will equal or exceed men's pay rates.
That’s objectively false. Please learn how facts work. Women were very much in college in the 1980s, and definitely in the 1990s and 2000s… and so on and many brilliant women were denied moving up the ranks because white men hire other white men. The reason few women are CEOs is because of good old fashioned sexism. The upper echelons of the business world is run by white men who prefer to hire white men for important positions over women who are equally qualified. Thanks for the always helpful mansplaining ( justifying) gender inequality 🙄
It's a bigger problem. 30 years from now, men will likely still dominate in any position that requires years in a career. What kills women's career is the burden of family responsibilities. There is no silver bullet to that, as only women can be mothers.
@OtterMarten While suicide deaths are tragic, way many more women raise children than men die by suicide. And so by and large, men stay in their careers while women do not. If your point is that men are unhappy, four times more girls attempt suicides than boys. They may not be successful at actually ending their lives, but one has to be in a very bad place to attempts suicide.
An issue with boys and girls is lack of responsibility that is meaningful as they grow up. Do they contribute to the family? do they feel needed within the family? As a child we shared caring for the siblings or helping in the home.The emphasis now seems to be all on external success in sports or academia. There is a lack of duty to others that gives successes meaning. And that is vital whether the future is in a vocation or academia.
An excellent observation. I agree 100%. And to your point, I think that a sense of obligation to, and engagement with the local community has declined along with the decline of our expectation that our children contribute to the care and maintenance of family and home. It takes a village, as they say, but Americans have devolved to become all islands unto themselves. Which prevents the kind of community that enhances and enforces the crucial lessons learned from being held to reasonable expectation of contributing to the care and maintenance of home and family. A sense of commitment and of caring about the care and maintenance of our society and those who belong to it has not just dwindled, it's becomes more and more vilified each passing day. God forbid anyone asks WWJD and then "woke-ly" go and do it. Sadly, we're heading in the wrong direction.
Yes and perhaps many boys would benefit from being sort-of briefed and motivated on the school mission: here is why we need you to do this. You will be needed, and we need you to do this now. It's not just "homework" just because.
Boys need men in there lives who are positive role models,right now it seems on social media and in life in general many men behave in an angry,crass,juvenile way.
Look at the video games boys are playing, they promote violence and often violence on women. This isn’t new, remember almost 20 years back having to return a birthday gift back to another parent and asking “did you know the characters in this game are bashing each other with baseball bats?” Parents were/are often clueless sometimes as to the toxic culture in video gaming, the misogyny and violence. It’s very difficult to control access and exposure since it’s to a point where if they are not gaming, they are outsiders, not normal. It’s a huge problem with boys/teens wasting years, hundreds if not thousands of hours play video games.
The elephant in the room is boy's and men's easy access to horrific, violent, degrading p*rn. Many males have become addicted to it and brainwashed by it, and it's ruined them. It's the reason so many of them are "incels" and have become too afraid to approach or date women anymore. They don't seem to know how to relate to women in a normal, healthy way. And they don't make the effort to learn.
The story of women and girls progressing has a lot to do with necessity. I grew up with a single mother and it was expected that I would go to college and work toward a good job. Because that was my only avenue to a secure future. I think society has assumed that boys are in the power position so they don't have to try as hard and are now more likely to fall into the social trap of drinking and living recklessly in their teens and 20s because movies and music romanticize it. And the boys who don't do that are told they aren't "real men" by society. Part of it is attitude. Which is why that free Kalamazoo program resulted in 0 male grads.
@Laura Exactly. Women have been forced to evolve into overachievers. They have to work harder than their male counterparts to achieve the same or slightly less results. And women of color must work two and three times harder. It's neither a coincidence, nor a surprise. The last two or three generations of girls (and especially poor, working class, and lower middle class girls) grew up seeing how society treated their mothers and grandmothers, and realized that the only way to better was through achievement, no matter what. On that note, it was disappointing to see that the speaker in the video didn't acknowledge the hell most women go through to obtain degrees in historically male dominated STEM fields. And it's double for women of color. Women and girls are making the choice to endure these systems because they have living examples in the elders that came before them that there is no other alternative. Economic inequality is steadily getting worse. Most households can no longer survive on one income. For poor, working class, and lower middle class folks, gone are the days of marrying a man who has a job that can pay all the bills. And most women know that wasn't an ideal situation for the women who lived it anyway. So when the doors were finally opened to women and girls, they ran through them at full speed. We should also not forget that even with all of this achievement, millions of women and girls are still left behind. We shouldn't allow the success stories to overshadow the many crushed by our broken systems. If we fix these fundamentally flawed systems, including societal norms and attitudes, the tide would be raised for boys, men, girls, and women. We could create a society where everyone can live a life of peace and dignity.
I would agree with this. My mom was very intent on pushing me into a career (80s)...corporate offices were still super sexist at the time but I still pushed upward. Had I been able to have a daughter I would have pushed her to a higher educational level than me.
@Laura *"Part of it is attitude. Which is why that free Kalamazoo program resulted in 0 male grads."* - Why is it so popular in America to assume you know things without bothering to ask questions? Sometimes I think it's just part of the hubris of the culture. Other times I think it's rooted in being too lazy to ask the questions, and then being too lazy to do the work of answering them. But honestly I have no idea, so I won't come to a conclusion as to why so many Americans think they have answers.
I have 2 exceptional children. My daughter is 30, my son 26 -27 in Dec. Shes a bartender. Loves it. She also excelled in school/sports. Excells at all jobs. Could do medical coding but prefers hands on labor! Totally helped my niece organize her organic farm duties. My son, excelled in high school/sports. Went to school for nursing, stopped to become a Firefighter, went back for his RN, is an EMT, & now doing paramedic training. Its parenting. Be a better parent than your own parents. Parents are a childs 1st teacher. Couldn't be more proud of both my babies!! They're the best;)
@@based3052 ... Do you have any clue how much a bartender can make? No, you obviously don't. And you obviously don't understand that HAPPINESS with one's occupation is also very important.
One problem is: For the first 20 years of your life in the United States, you are expected to be NFL TOUGH. Then, by the you are 30; women and some are asking you, "Why are you not sensitive?"
I believe you've articulated an important problem here. Why are parents still raising their boys to be emotionally challenged? What purpose does this serve in the 21st century? If the jobs of the future are going to require greater emotional intelligence, why are we not teaching boys to deal with their feelings AND educating them to do the jobs that will be out there? Our present "either/or" mentality isn't serving anyone well.
@@dottiebaker6623 Exactly. We need to stop handicapping boys from developing the soft skills they'll need on the job. If they're not allowed to express or even recognize entire ranges of emotions in themselves (alexithymia) how are they going to succeed at life? Especially in this stressful time?
My boys were at a daycare where the primary caregiver was Mr John - a wonderful man in his 30s who made working with 4-7 year olds his career. My cousin, too, worked in a daycare (his FT job was professional drummer) - and he felt kids benefited from the different energy.
I see kids working all the time (anyone hear of a child star?) so have begun to rethink the outrage about kids working. It seems to be more of an attempt to prolong parenthood.
@@professordogwood8985 Males are really viewed quite nastily. That is growing worse in the present age of Feminism and Preacher Abuse. Most men are not Preachers or abusive bosses. We are just folks who want to have a life. Anger has been a problem but we are learning to not hit, I think. It shows up a lot when job and home life becomes unsatisfying and we want out. I think that's what's unrecognized and it's attached to the stigma around being a quitter (loser).
Has he even considered how our culture doesn't encourage boys to be smart? We tell them they need to be in sports stars, not academics. What outcome do you expect when we give them that mentality?
That is utter nonsense. Our culture (the US specifically) encourages willful stupidity in the entire population, both girls and boys. Here in the US, we have a scientifically illiterate culture that doesn’t understand how facts work or logical reasoning and thinks their individual uneducated unqualified useless opinion is as valuable as an expert’s. But as always full of shameless confidence🙄
Not necessarily true. I think men are to be focused on academics if it leads to a lot of money like a doctor, lawyer or businessperson. Bigger issue is men are too focused on making a lot of money and getting "paid" instead of going into a career they are passionate about or helping others.
@B L *"Has he even considered how our culture doesn't encourage boys to be smart?"* Read the book and see if your claims/beliefs about what boys are taught are addressed.
@@awesum1075atl The gaming problem is huge. My son has the highest I.Q. in the family (134) but he only went to college because his rich grandma paid for it. He took his time with that. My daughter seldom gamed, but studied as soon as she got home to the point of exhaustion. She now has a Ph.D in human genetics, and her own lab with assistants at Penn State. There was nothing I could do about my son's gaming (long story I'll skip).
@@alelectric2767 --OR-- perhaps absent fathers could be the reason? For every single mom, there is a father that may or may not be in the picture. Boys need more male role models showing them how to be responsible, compassionate, dedicated, hard working, dependable, loyal, etc. Seems more like a problem of absent fathers vs single mothers IMO.
Well said. You get what you pay for, and the US has decided not to pay their teachers a respectable wage. And then they wonder why education is in such a state.
Every degree does not have equal value. Many graduates are underemployed ( do not work up to their skill kevel) and in debt. Women tend not to apply for roles unless they satisfy all of the requirements. More stratified data and a chart on whether the larger gaps were between females and males from lower income families would be useful. Many classes are still sedentary and structured like classes in the nineteenth century and haven't evolved to help children release energy regularly during the day. A wider variety of mentors and role models would be useful for all.
Helping one should not neglect the other. One better than the other is something parents do when they limit their children based on gender. Promote a complete education for any child. This was very good information. I have more nephews than nieces by relation and more nieces than nephews by friendships. We need boys to become successful men so they can be healthy fathers, husbands and community members. We need women to be successful so they can be healthy mothers, wives and community members. The US is also lacking on Emotional Awareness which can impact school and professional success. This is aside from the income issues. We started hearing in the 70s that the job market would change. Anything that is us vs them or 'real' is damaging to all.
@T H *"Helping one should not neglect the other. One better than the other is something parents do when they limit their children based on gender. Promote a complete education for any child."* It's a relief to read the rare, sane comment like this posted to the video. Cheers!
No one needs a "successful" woman...how do they define success, again? I think it has something to do with size, visavie "bigger is always better" "Successful women" is the reason this place is so fucked.
@@JeffCaplan313 You do realize all Victoria's Secret models are dudes. That's the secret. All famous feminists are dudes. Gloria SteinMAN. It is MEN dressed as women doing this to you buddy.
Elephant in the room: billionaires, tax codes favoring very few, the destruction of the middle class, the apex of a city or town center lost to shopping malls. I am a feminist and am completely and totally committed to boys' rights. My feminist credentials are human credentials.
As a private tutor and teacher. Way more family's of lower middle class are willing to pay for a tutor for their daughters but few for their sons. Upper class family's pay for sons and daughters at roughly equal rates.
@Wade Gauthier - It's anecdotal data but at least it _is_ a form of evidence. Most of these comments don't even have personal anecdotes to share, yet are full of passionate claims anyway. Thank you for sharing this. Now I'm curious to have a look round and see how common your experience is.
@@embarq12 - Please watch the video and try to keep up, dear. The investment in girls is a function of societal/governmental initiatives. This isn't a case of of parents deliberately deciding to invest in the needs of one child while ignoring the needs of another, because they think there would be some long term benefit for themselves. He's talking about things like girls-only STEM programs that were set up to address the disparity of male dominated science careers. And the promotion of women to STEM teaching positions, so that girls would have role models throughout their education. Only an absolutely moral monster would look at their little baby boy and little baby girl and be "more willing to invest in girls" as a retirement plan. Jesus Christ, I hope you aren't so morally bankrupt that this is something you'd do to one of your children...
This is real amongst young men who are from dysfunctional families. These young men do need help. In particular mental health as well as educational help.
Yes, also nutritional education and support. A lot of children diagnosed as ADHD have severe vitamin deficiencies and gut imbalances (often caused by antibiotics and pesticides) that are affecting their executive function.
So, I'm a guy who taught for ten years, and in the case of boys, I don't feel like the achievement gap is due to school policies, lack of role models, lack of opportunities, etc. The achievement gap largely boils down to how parents socialize their boys. They don't emphasize soft skills, communication, manners, etc. the way they do with girls. Parents today raise girls to be extremely well rounded. They don't do that with boys, especially as you descend the socioeconomic ladder. Boys are still told garbage like, "Be a man" or "Man up." Basically, bottle your rage and energy until you inevitably have an outburst. They're generally only given aggressive toys, or athletic toys. People don't give their boys toys that teach nurturing, media targeted towards boys is still very aggressive, while media targeted towards girls is all about cultivating friendships and interpersonal skills. When was the last time you saw a superhero solve a problem through mutual understanding and compromise? People act like like the achievement gap is a systemic issue in schools, but the way people raise their boys has very little relevance today. English class is fundamentally about being able to communicate, and empathize with others through text. Boys aren't taught to examine their feelings. Of course they have a hard time dissecting the motivations of literary characters. Boys are taught that physical strength and toughness make "a man." There are no white collar jobs where those attributes are called for at all. Blaming parents for societal problems is always unpopular, especially when the issue is that they're "following tradition." In this case though, that's squarely the problem. If the way the achievement gap has flipped in the space of a few generations shows us anything, it's that many of these sorts of issues are caused by socialization. Your kids spend eight hours a day, 180 days of the year at school. That accounts for roughly 16% of their year. The rest of their time is spent at home. Fix parenting instead of blaming schools.
@@dabirdalton I'm hardly blaming boys by saying their parents are raising them with values that are out of sync with today's reality. If we still taught girls that their main value was to be pretty and have babies they wouldn't cope well with today's society either. That's basically what we're doing with boys. How many boys are taught nonsense like wilderness survival skills over social skills? That's ridiculous.
The military has an interesting system. Advancement in rank happens through two criteria: time in, and skill acquisition. If you don't advance, attention is applied to you, or else you wake up and work on your skills. Everyone gets shuffled along, and you get meaningful responsibility early in life.
The military invests in their people in a way the private sector finds intolerable. ...and the military is largely socialist, which is something most Americans would recoil to hear.
As a man and step-dad to my son, I feel what the US needs most is to value education a lot more. I think women mature faster and wake up to needing higher education a lot faster than males do. When I was 20 the future was a month away at most, and women my age were no longer falling for the local rock singer and were getting college catalogs in the mail. Look at the immigrants who move here and seriously kick-butt in school. They are male and female AND come from a culture that values education. We don't live the 1950s when low skill could make serious $. Males will always mature more slowly than females. It's great that women don't face so many obstacles anymore but the men not doing as well as men in the 50s has to do with the nature of jobs these days. With automation, low skill jobs are going away. We need to make education one of the most important American values.
Agreed. I also think that women know they have a short time to establish a career if they also want to have a family. The men don't seem as rushed or as able to get on board with education as a whole.
I think the opposite. Higher Education has become nearly worthless. There's exceptions if your going into certain very specific fields (STEM, Accounting, Finance, Professional School, etc.), but most people who go to college do not major in any of those. Trades are far more lucrative right now.
@@jordanneedscoffee Disagree because many people do well in many fields they study in college and now you have to pretty much pick a major these days and stick with it, but even if you are correct on this that vocational skills are more lucrative on the whole which is a big if and not proven, why are men struggling in the workforce then? Not enough training for them in certain vocational fields? What are your fixes since they are clearly struggling college or no college?
@@shisiki-2649 I think having a lot of women criticizing you or having superior skills in an area growing up does have a detrimental effect emotionally for men. Men want a scapegoat and so go in a different direction. Makes sense emotionally especially as kids age and want to look to a male role model for becoming an adult. How many girls played teacher growing up? It was an ideal role model for them.
I come from a time when sexes were often seperated for schooling. The boys had male teachers who, I felt, even then, were better able to work with the issues of young men. Maybe it's time to return to that format. Boys & girls mature at different rates & learn in different ways. Lets gear learning to those curves.
As much as US infrastructure needs overhaul, men can get out here and fix these roads, bridges, build electric trains, work on our water systems, our power grids!! Women can design but men can bring it to life!
In the country I grew up in the high school was set up so those wanting and testing as such went to college prep and those that had an interest and aptitude for welding or horse training went to school in the morning and to their master welder or master horse trainer in the afternoon where they worked towards their trade license. It wasn’t a male female thing that directed the trade choice or college choice, it was aptitude and interest.
The many denigrating, fallacious, and misleading comments about men in this thread amaze me. If any of you had wondered why men are retreating into their own worlds, here it is.
I grew up in lower class. Majority of girls outperform guys. I noticed families are putting more pressure and responsibilities on female, especially middle eastern and brown families. I think families should be more though on their sons.
I see this as a black American female as well. To me, lower class and certain ethnicities of people never seemed to shift out of certain outdated gender norms or had different societal structures to begin with that don't gel with what is needed in a modern society (especially in the US where various forms of social and educational inequality are prevalent) boys to thrive and girls to not end up burdened or resented by the boys. Or, in some cases, because groups of men were disadvantaged, certain groups felt that men shouldn't be expected to achieve at high levels
Agree. Girls have to succeed in school and then come home and do chores, maybe provide childcare for younger siblings, maybe cook. Boys can slack off in school then run the streets and come home at midnight. Boys are given way too much freedom and it negatively affects girls.
Haha. And the interesting point is that women still expect to find an alpha male, who they can look up to, earns more and has a higher status in the society. And there you go, less marriages, less kids and more lonliness and depression.
I am 60 years old. When I was in school I was not guided toward math or science at all. Thank goodness they finally pushed females forward in this area. My sons friends who are all males are all top students and are going into engineering which a overwhelming male.
Even 10 years ago, a lot of these fields were overwhelmingly male. I worked at a (then) 15 year old tech company of 180 people. This company was well-known for their engineering talent. There were two female engineers. They were probably the top 15% in the company in terms of skill. They probably had to be to make it in. Glad things are changing.
@@cstuartdc How TF do you think "feminists" had ANYTHING to do with "pulling" men out of education? You're apparently not as intelligent as you think you are if you think that is how it happened.
@@cstuartdc The chickification of education started waaaaay back as public education expanded. States figured out they could pay women less for the same work (same old story), and it was one of the few legitimate careers for women. Women were kept out of the general workforce and men went on to compete for higher paying jobs (there were laws passed in the 30s that made it ILLEGAL for married women to work outside the home and were on the books in southern states until WWII when they needed women in the factories). You ended up with A LOT of frustrated scientists, doctors, artists, and CEOs (women couldn’t sign for loans, they needed a man to cosign regardless of finances. ‘No honey, you can’t start your own business to compete with my friends. Back to the kitchen now!’) So when Congress started passing laws in the 70s to remove restrictions on women, the result was a brain-drain out of education into the private sector. Combine that with a reversal of 30 years of liberal education spending on education (‘50s to ‘80) as Reagan’s administration started the process of defunding public education (whilst promoting privatization of the whole shebang) and you end up with a sector that the employees (teachers) have to constantly battle the institution (schools) to produce the product (education) for which they were hired!
@Jennifer E. Nordstrom - I'd suggesting reading the book to see if any of that is addressed. But if you want uninformed opinions, I can give you mine. There was a Satanic panic in the 70s(?) blaming all social ills on rock and roll music. In the 80s it was dungeons and dragons. In the 90s it was rap music. By the 2000s, video games. Maybe around the 2010s the devil swapped over to porn. It's 2020, I think we need a new demon to blame all social evils on. How about vapping and weed?
Well then you'd have to blame the boys for what they do to themselves and that goes against this coddling of boys video. We all KNOW the real problem - what you wrote. And it's always been this way. How many households in the past decades women and girls were stuck listening to stupid men yell at the boob tube for football, pay per view or whatevs. They had to outlaw alcohol one hundred years ago because men were just as stupid and destructive then as they are now. Nothing new under the son.
@@juliebella1221 We are much more a product of our environments than we'd ever like to admit. We like to think we are propelled by our visions of and for ourselves, but the average person reaches for low hanging fruit. Boys need direction, but it can't come through public schools because the direction needed is probably best in the form of men's groups involving morals, leadership, rites if passage and such. Some things are more accessible than ever before and when boys have spiritual and psychological issues, they find distraction (if not outright hate) and resentment, totally disrespecting all the investments women have put into from their first breath. Sadly, we are discovering that many priests and men who got into Boy Scouts were sexually exploiting boys there too. Maybe there aren't enough men investing in boys, and that's because the average man doesn't do anything unless he gets paid. Please notice I said average men. There are good men out there, and I think the numbers are increasing even though they struggle with the environment that disrespect women as well.
I held my son back a year and developmentally it made all the difference because he was able to focus more and to have a greater ability to manage his own wants and desires. He then by default could reason and process concepts more effectively. He currently has two male teachers and a male mentor at his freshman year in high school and I’m thrilled he’ll get to see different men teaching and sharing their experiences.
It is extraordinary but now we have an entire generation of groundless young men looking for meaning and usefulness. They are led by the nose by those who deny intellect and improvement for the evaporating moat of prior times. I live in a neighborhood filled with them. Toxic masculinity has been their only bequest. Where did the Trump voters come from? Right here.
IMO, we often have a myopic view of gender inequality! We focus on the world “out there,” which has traditionally and clearly disadvantaged working women! However, if we instead turn our attention to the world of feelings (affect) “in here,” boys and men have not yet had their liberation! When males cannot express sadness, fear, grief and the like, because they often do no have the requisite interiority, an expressive language, or the support and encouragement of others (primarily other males) to describe what it is like for them “in there,” we have a male affective disadvantage. The results is the affect males are permitted to express - anger - is there in disproportion! The structure of masculinity is fragile! Anger, despression, hopelessness, aloneness, especially among young men, leads to a host of social and vocational dysfunctions! Traditional gendering has led to a too rigid separation of men “out there” and women “in here!” While that is changing, many boys and men, especially in working class families, are raised very traditionally. We should better realize that inequalities cut in all directions, and are not specific to women, blacks, gays and the like. Time to become more conscious of what we have created, and to be more even-handed in remediating our cultural biases!
I'm 65 years old and up until the the mid 80's the school district that I was educated in had tax paper high school vocational training before the funding for the program ended and that created LPN's, mechanics, carpenter and HVAC courses, they were tested by the state in order to qualify for employment, then for profit technical schools started cropping up everywhere, I felt it was money well spent, at least it kept people off public assistance and gainfully employed.
My entire life girls were expected to behave better than boys in many ways. We expect girls to behave and we communicate that to them in many ways. That includes sitting in a chair and reading, doing schoolwork and even crafts
Hmmm…I wonder why male teachers have left teaching… Oh, yea! They won’t stand for the disrespectful pay and treatment! Why do female teachers stay? For some reason we either love teaching or feel that we have few alternative choices.
Men left teaching elementary school classrooms, because the parents started to accuse them of pedophilia due to the parent's misguided belief that the only reason a man would teach very young kids is because he "was attracted to them".
This was a very good insight and I'm glad I didn't scroll past it like I was going to because of the title. But listening to the author really had me thinking. Thanks.
Very interesting piece. I would've like to hear a little more about the WHY certain groups of boys/men are falling behind. The comments about boys needing more adult support re: completing assignments on time and "red-shirting" due to slower developmental timelines suggest perhaps "natural" gender differences, while girls needing less discrimination, more opportunity, and more role models suggest environmentally driven gender differences. I wonder about the cultural and other environmental influences on the outcomes of less privileged boys/men. For instance, what is society's view about boys/men pursuing "women's" work? Women tend to be over-represented in fields providing direct care to children, esp. younger children. These fields also happen to pay less and have fewer benefits. Meanwhile, men are in fact better represented in teaching fields at the high school and post-secondary level. Why? Could it be that those teaching positions are viewed less as "women's" work and more prestigious? As others have said, fields seen as more "manly" still suffer from over-representation of men (and minorities), such as trades and IT. So, the push for more men -- esp. men of color, esp. in the earlier grades, esp. in subjects traditionally seen as less "manly" -- to teach is a potentially helpful strategy. But more systemic level strategies might be needed to adjust what it means for a boy/man to be successful and why it's ok if there is overlap with what it means for a girl/woman to be successful. This piece might also want to bring up the urgency of dealing with boys/men feeling jilted while being owed something, because there are gender differences in how people respond to resentment, insecurity, and perceived injustice.
@Shade Tails *"I would've like to hear a little more about the WHY certain groups of boys/men are falling behind."* This is a very good reason to buy the book.
"On many social and economic measures, Black men fare worse not only than white men, but white and Black women, as we show above. Part of the cause is that Black men are “uniquely stigmatized,” according to studies of implicit bias conducted by political scientists Ismail White and Corrine McConnaughy: more than 40% of white respondents rank “many or almost all” Black men as “violent.” White men are less than half as likely to be described in this way, at about the same rates as for Black women, while white women are very unlikely to be labeled as violent. It’s no surprise, then, that Black men are also more likely to be stopped by the police, more likely to be frisked, more likely to be arrested, more likely to be convicted, and more likely to be killed by law enforcement. As Rashawn Ray, a Rubenstein Fellow at Brookings argues, “Black men have a different social reality from their black female counterparts,” he writes. “The perceptions of others influence black men’s social interactions with co-workers and neighbors [and] structure a unique form of relative deprivation…In this regard, the intersectionality framework becomes useful for illuminating black men’s multiplicities and vulnerabilities.”" I hope they also explore the cultural expectations of Black men from the Black community. Just ask Black women, esp. those who serve as primary breakwinner, about the reasons Black men are struggling to keep up. www.brookings.edu/blog/up-front/2020/11/19/the-challenges-facing-black-men-and-the-case-for-action/
These are all great questions, and the willingness to explore biases will surely lead to realizing how they can be co-opted to the benefit of others. Usually the answer is money.
@@Commentator488 Bad logic. In the 1800s-early 1900s any shade of red was considered too violent for girls, so boys wore pink and girls wore blue. Attitudes on a subject can flip over time. And there have always been outliers for any activity. So just because someone in the outgroup was involved does not change the overall perception. And yes, the earliest precursors to computers were the pattern cards for weaving looms, no doubt designed by women.
The opportunities do come to men. However, since so little effort is geared towards us, we generally recline from the world while women end up doing everything. It's an unhealthy scenario and eventually it's going to crack.
You mean that trying to promote equality between men and women by raising women from the bottom only succeeds in creating inequality between the somewhat-raised women and those men who continue to be at the bottom(and resentment from said men), while at the drastically higher top the men who have control of everything continue to be at the top? Not too difficult to predict it, really.
I think he's saying a *_*lot*_* more than that, but I agree that's one of the things he's saying. He's also saying we need more male teachers and programs to benefit boys, modeled after the successes we have with programs designed to benefit girls. I'm sure the full book will also present far more arguments than the interview could make time for.
@Kaci - I agree class matters. I don't agree with the OP that the author is "basically saying that class matters". I think he's saying a lot of other things matter as much, and a focus on class as 'basically the thing that matters' risks that we'll over priortise. Putting more male teachers in public schools as instructors and administrators isn't a class issue, in my view. Designing after school and scholastic programs for boys--modeled on those we designed for girls--likewise isn't a class issue, as far as I can see. Initiatives to achieve these goals could be planned out at the state and federal level to benefit children of all communities. Just my two cents on the matter obviously. Cheers!
@Kaci - Unlike some of the other people commenting on the channel you seem like a decent person. But we're talking at cross purposes. I've explained why I don't think having male teachers and/or programs for boys is inherently a class issue: there are programs for girls that are accessible to low income and wealthy families alike, and initiatives to fund male teachers and administrators could be enacted at the state and federal level, bypassing the crass way funds are doled out in some school districts. Since we seem to be talking past one another I'll leave it here and wish you well. Cheers.
Absolutely. The democratic party and the progressive wing have almost nothing to offer men. People tend to vote for a party that sells them a world they want to be a part of. Democrats have been heavy on supporting women, and there is effectively nothing for men. Meanwhile the Republican party is doing things like suggesting they'll return to the old, traditional ways when men were valued and respected on a cultural level. Whether this is true or not remains to be seen, but it has clearly worked since minority men have begun flocking to Republicans.
The way to battle this malaise that plagues men today is to fight toxic masculinity. It’s no accident that men are more likely to commit s*incide than women. Boys need to be taught that connecting to their feelings, being vulnerable and open minded are tools that will only help men achieve better outcomes in life.
Richard Reeves is the man!! Love his brilliant book, "Dreamhoarders", about the top 19 percent upper middle class while they've "left the rest in the 80 percent in the dust! So apropos these days, unfortunately! Thank you Amanpour & Co, will add this recent book to my ever long reading list! "knowledge is power".....self-empowerment!
3:46 "Most American men makes less now than most American men did in 1979." What happened in the 1980s and since? Reaganomics. Trickle down economics has nearly destroyed opportunity for most Americans. Now we compete to subsist. Vote blue.
It's incredible to see the absolute shitshow of an administration and general ruin the U.S. lies in only to have someone still say 'vote Blue.' This species is beyond fucked.
@Lumberjack Dreamer - Really? You'd rather have nine Amy Coney Barretts? If I were forced to choose between nine ACBs and nine Thurgood Marshall's, I'd go with the latter. But you do you, boo
@@ajmeyers5661 I hope we can move beyond the red hat weirdos. I hope trump-Putin will go away for good. Then we can have reasonable people in congress and yes, nine reasonable women in the Supreme Court.
@@lumberjackdreamer6267 As I've said, given the choice of nine ACBs or nine Thurgood Marshalls I'll have the latter. You're welcome to your choice of sexual politics over good jurisprudence though. It's still a free country, so you do you boo. I'm just pleased I have the means to move with my family to a civilised country that values all its citizens, should your vision of gender uber alles gain traction. Cheers!
@@ajmeyers5661 We’re not asking you to chose. Stay in your lane. First, we need to imprison trump, get rid of the red hat sheeple, reclaim our country, move forward with progress and liberal values. Then we’ll chose competent women to serve on the Supreme Court. No more weirdos.
In my senior year of high school in English class, I was having a back and forth about an element of a book we had just read. The discussion touched on a topic we had learned about the year before in history class. I looked over at the girl next to me, and I said "you have no idea what we're talking about do you?" She said she didn't. I said "we learned this last year in history class. You got an A on the test and I got a C." She confessed again she remembered none of this. My "C" grade was lower than hers, but I actually thought about the stuff we had learned. Probably, I just didn't find 20% of the information we had learned to be very interesting, so I didn't file it away. But I added what I did find interesting into my memory. She, on the other hand, memorized for the test, dumped all the data. So how do we take that into account? How do you grade for that? How do you grade for a student who is truly engaged but not exactly making the effort to get high grades VS a student who is engaged for the sake of grades? I think the answer is that you don't, and that our entire education system is just measuring the wrong things. Also, the dumbing down of education is incredibly demoralizing for people who do take an interest in the topics. And that is, so a friend tells me, based on a misreading of Dewey.
Well, capitalism and most jobs are like this, though - you work to collect a reward that is set out by other people. Whether she forgot everything afterwards because she found it uninteresting does not matter as long as she has figured out how to game the system. If you or anyone else learned for self-development, the question of "How do you grade for that" is simple - you don't. remembering what you found interesting is the reward in itself.
I believe CEOs tend to be older, so the stats haven't yet caught up to their bracket. Like any wave, it can only move at a certain speed. It will be interesting to see if more college degrees presages more executive arrests in future years, and whether it will be linear or still lag.
A female psychologist wrote a book on this very subject about 10 years ago. She had a son and was concerned that he was falling behind and wanted to investigate why.
There is nothing stopping men from getting an education, nothing. If they choose not to get an education or develop marketable skills; well they are free to choose. Choosing to complain instead of competing, that's on them.
Sorry, but I'm an old white guy and just because women (and minorities) are starting to finally get equal treatment in our society, I don't have much sympathy for these whining guys claiming they're now feeling put upon. Everyone getting to participate equally in our society is good all the way around.
The pay gap is not always related to parenting. Most of the childless working women I know are struggling with low pay; the childless working men I know are paid well. Anedotal evidence yes, but it can't be merely a coincidence. Especially since a boss once told me the reason the company didn't pay me more or promote me was because I was an attractive woman and they assumed I would marry and take time off to have kids, so why invest in me? This is the expectation, even when women choose not to have children.
Men still don't see education as important, but women/girls do. That is why girls are succeeding academically than boys in k-12 and post high school. Until we see education as important, men aren't going to participate. A lack of male teachers today means boys, who don't have a positive male role model or any role model at all find themselves looking to the wrong type of male adult role models ie professional athletes, musicians, actors (at the macro level) or local criminals or even abusive male family members (at the local level)
I'm curious to see how and/or if this information on men's income changes since 1979 takes into consideration manufacturing moving offshore to China. These individuals didn't need to get a 2 or 4 year college degree to get paid well. Their unions helped them maintain a living wage unlike today's work wage environment.
I think maybe in past generations, when women were blatantly excluded, (white)men were more privileged in that the world catered to them and while a woman would have to be the best of best to get respect, men just have to show up to get the same respect. Now that SOME progress toward gender equality has been made, some of the past automatic privilege they enjoyed for centuries has decreased in some professions (although there are still plenty of male dominated professions that remain hostile to and exclude women) but the entitlement of (white) men remains the same expecting unearned privilege and in some cases are unprepared to learn that unlike their father’s generation, they now actually need to prove their worth.
Clearly hypergamy is the problem. How does a male make more money with equality? 50+% of men are invisible to women. What incentive/purpose is there for these men to work? Gov assistance is over $2K/month working part time, why work hard when you can play and enjoy other things in life. In general, women are the materialistic ones that pushed men in relationships to be in servitude and do more. As the matriarchy forms, it is now the women who will be working and supporting the men via gov programs.
I got the impression he was saying that women’s status and pay, as well as entry into certain professions has improved by almost 40% in a couple of fields (i.e. STEM) so we’d better stop that trend now so that men can catch back up. 40% isn’t very much considering the historical record of how long women were not even allowed in those professions at all, and considering it’s only in two fields he mentioned: STEM and Law. I don’t think men (or society) needs to freak out just yet over that. Women are hardly “taking over the country” just yet, not even close. Why don’t we help women reach EQUALITY in ALL positions, whether vocational, academic or corporate or political or whatever fields they might be interested in. No need to “keep men down”; they (men) will also need help receiving the best education in whatever field they’re interested in as well. We should keep on with that system until all work situations in all businesses are 50/50 men and women, IF there were 50% of women who would want to be in a particular field. If not filled right away to 50%, keep the position open until a woman applies for it. I guarantee it won’t be empty long. I think a wonderful solution, for men and women both, would be to enshrine the Equal Rights Amendment in the Constitution (since it has already been ratified by the required 38 states as of January, 2020, so the 2-year “waiting period” has also already been satisfied). Everybody seems to think the ERA is ONLY about women’s rights (even though that was its PRIMARY intention), it doesn’t even mention women, per se. The text of the ERA says, “Equality of Rights under the law shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any State on account of sex”. Period. That means that men shall have the same rights as women and vice versa. EQUAL rights. For everybody. Everybody freaks out over it because they seem to think it will make women “more equal” (an oxymoron) than men. Equal means equal. Period. End of story. Can’t we realize that it will help EVERYONE? But, of course, they’re fighting against it in Congress right now because so many male Congressmen (Mitt Romney for one) just can’t stand the thought of women being equal to men, as demonstrated just this year - in the 21st Century no less! - by SCOTUS taking away a Constitutional right from women that they’ve benefited from for 50 years! If we had put the Equal Rights Amendment into the Constitution that couldn’t have happened. But that’s beside the point of the discussion here. I hope you can see how the inclusion of the ERA into the Constitution could be used to help everyone, male or female, or LGTBQ+. Please call and/or send letters to Biden, Harris, your Senators and Representatives pushing them to do this since it will help everyone. The problems in education and the workplace as described in the book discussed shouldn’t have anything at all to do with gender, but about our government’s desire and ability to help ALL it’s citizens through educational, economic and labor standards.
Male's limited roles of protector/ provider are threatened not by women but by economic structures changing and insistence of valuing traditional roles. Find more ways to feel valuable than control and power.
Hello. The disparate differences between boys vs girls described in the book is not new; girls/women have always been ahead in the stem classes, than boys/men by at least a year in emotional and educational development; this is not surprising; I am 83 years, went to a one room school house with all eight grades and my mother was the teacher; I saw the premise of the book back then. The research is right and appropriate for our time. Practicing law for 51 years solo. Victor 😇💃
@Victor V *"The disparate differences between boys vs girls described in the book is not new; girls/women have always been ahead in the stem classes"* - Not according to the research, Victor. If you have other data to draw from that can cast doubt on the author's scholarship then please do provide it. *"The research is right and appropriate for our time."* - What does this mean?
I raised 3 boys. Vocational classes in high school helped my boys the most. They got out of high school with skills to continue in a viable career and actually continue to community college for an associate degree and now are quite successful, happy and making a good salary. Why do we think high school is just to prepare every kid for a 4 year college? How about a successful life!
Thanks for the great interview!
Great point. What happened to the vocational education stream vs. the academic college stream of yesteryear? Not all young people want or are suited for the college route. Nor does that even meet the countries needs for skilled workers in so many areas.
Both are needed.
Don’t forget that the Republicans are the ones who destroyed the working middle class by union busting and their trickle down economic theory which lets rich people hoard the money. The GOP doesn’t care about working class people. Vote Democrat!
@@coreyham3753 Have you been asleep for the past 60 years?
@@based3052 Yep, I sleep great for 8 hours every night. What about you?
The lack of any vocational training is a huge negative for many boys. I went to elementary school with a boy who wasn't academically inclined but he was skilled at building things. He learned photography by age 11. He built a contact printer. But at school he was considered stupid.
Girls can relate to this too. It's about the way we think and process and do things. We can't all fit into this one narrow little funnel of education. There needs to be more respect for the makers and doers of the world.
I like making things too, and would have enjoyed more industrial arts training. Girls just weren't being steered in that direction at that time, and now it's amazing when schools still have access to trade programs. Definitely more an exception than a norm in a lot of places.
This is bad for girls as well.....having few voc trainings
Exactly
yes, we need to use our tech to id skills and focus practical pathways earlier ... silicon valley has only used to tech to manipulate us and addict our kids .... yeah, thanks zuck and bozos ... sickos
I was a teacher; men don’t put up with degradation which is what teaching has become after the reforms and budget cuts and charter/private businesses had their way with my profession
I think part of the reason is because it’s a female dominated profession and therefore not valued or respected. It’s sexism. I have no doubt that if teaching was a male dominated profession it would’ve been valued much more with good pay and more resources.
As a father of young children; I can’t responsibly take any employment other than the highest paying employment I can find. There are lots of careers I would love to do, teaching is one of them, but that’s just a dream when the (vast) majority of the family’s financial burden falls on me.
My wife is intelligent and educated, but childcare is so incredibly expensive that most of the money from her work would go to that. Not to mention that our cities are designed around cars, not people, so driving the kids to the places they need to go (or just driving to work) takes all day.
Since our society isn’t just not made for raising children, but is aggressively anti-child, one of us takes a huge, irreversible career hit and the other is trapped on the most productive treadmill they can find.
@@chrisoffersen That’s life in ‘Murica, the country that’s terrible at everything.
If there’s any possible way to pull it off I recommend raising your children in an actual civilized first world country where the needs of families are valued. There’s no hope otherwise if you’re not wealthy, you will always struggle with unnecessary obstacles here.
@@rlud304 This is the most unhelpful comment. 330 million people are supposed to move to another country to raise their children? Not only is this not possible, but the poorest of them would inevitably be stuck here. America has big problems, but that doesn't make it a hopeless place to be. There are solutions if we don't run away.
It isn't true that girls do and boys dont
I recently saw an African proverb which I think describes our situation perfectly: "If the youth are not initiated, they will burn down the village." Our young men are in trouble and no-one seems to know what to do, so at least a book and conversation like this should be appreciated. I would also point people to small global non-profit organizations like Illuman which are forming around the world to "help men become healthier, more authentic men." One of their signature events is a Men's Rite of Passage - "That helps awaken men to the adventure and mystery of their own masculinity, their deep spirituality, and their potential for leadership." We need more of that type of formation for our young men who are lost and broken. Only men can heal men.
We need to dismantle family courts which have destroyed the American family in favor of woman, to the detriment of men and children.
The actual proverb is "The child who is not embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth". This matters because of the imagery.
Men and women can heal others. We must all take care of each other. Be kind, be decent and be thoughtful and considerate.
I've been a lawyer for 39 years and have practiced varied kinds of cases. A great proportion of the problems can be traced to a lack of strength of character, mostly in men This affects marriage, parenting, finances, criminal and other unethical activities. That affects all their relationships, which affects others around them, especially their children
@@tyrismaxey Tyris, thank you!
Having been a mother of a son and having been a teacher of plenty of boys and young men, I saw the psychological affects of bias against boisterous boys, etc., but I disagree that it was because of a missing rite of passage or masculinity squashing. I think it is precisely that culture that has trapped boys, young men, and older men into thinking they’ve failed at being “men.” We need a culture that allows men to be normal humans, a culture that doesn’t attach their masculinity to their success.
Hear hear!
Although I agree with your last sentence, I disagree about masculinity squashing. I don't think it's intended, but forcing young boys to sit all day long IS masculinity squashing.
*"We need a culture that allows men to be normal humans, a culture that doesn’t attach their masculinity to their success."* - Maybe this is part of *_*a*_* solution, but I don't think it's one for the problem raised by the author. We need to invest in our boys as much as we do our girls--this isn't what he said directly but I think it better addresses the problem he laid out than teaching boys that masculinity isn't tied to success.
tl;dr there's nothing wrong with emphasising the lack of direct correlation between masculinity and success, but it in no way will help boys achieve parity in education with girls--if we want parity then we need more male teachers and more programs designed for the needs of boys...similar initiatives to what we have for girls.
Amen
@@ajmeyers5661 I hope you also heard who are the boys who are mostly in trouble: minority and lower working class boys.
Maybe extending the child tax credit and mandatory pre-school could help. Guess who is against it? Maybe funding schools with something other than property taxes.
Usually these problems get framed as a culture war issue, good to see this discussed in a factual way.
I agree but fear the data is still going to be used as a Culture war issue.
truth - rare and refreshing
@@wizarddragon - Look at this comment section for evidence that your fears are being realised. Bad faith actors lined up within minutes of its posting to try and metaphorically shout down the arguments being discussed. Some of them are bots and trolls trying to stir up controversy, but not all. And the reaction to the backlash against the author has included some manosphere trolls and kooky MRAs.
I wouldn't at all be surprised to find out the author has received death threats, judging by some of the unhinged comments posted here
Thank you for expressing this.. a few on the top benefit in any war, while the general population suffers
? This is very much in line with the culture war...
Interestingly…10 years ago my struggling 3rd grade white son’s education experience was more or less rescued in-part by a very talented, patient yet firm Black male 3rd grade teacher who he really connected with.
@Joseph Huether - That seems to line up precisely with the author's conclusion. Anecdotes aren't evidence, but gather enough of them and it's no longer anecdotal.
Thanks for sharing this
I was saved by my 4th grade teacher who was a black man as well. That was in 1994
do tell...
your choice in inconsistent capitalization intrigues me
Bringing race into it was a little weird. The fact people are wired to immediately think that way isn't actual progress.
Shocking that working class boys are doing worse. It’s almost like having money in your pocket actually makes a difference.
💯 My response
Having money in your pocket causes theft.
Poorer men keep supporting those richer men who are squeezing them. We keep trying to tell them its not serving them, but are ignored and railed against
Literally.
Truth. The crisis is of masculinity, as it intersects with market fundamentalism and authoritarian politics.
what u talking about . its cuz most teacher are biased against boys. i could tell u for a fact teachers hate boys, especially if u a young black boy.
Elon Musk fanboys
@katherine savarese *"Poorer men keep supporting those richer men who are squeezing them."* - 53% of white women supported Trump...both times. We're looking at a bigger problem than "poor white men dumb".
imo it's a class issue, not a gender issue.
Quite frankly, when my daughter expressed a desire to become a teacher, my response was, no. She is now a successful attorney. Teachers require more respect and higher wages in high schools and below simply to make ends meet.
*"eachers require more respect and higher wages in high schools and below simply to make ends meet."* - Agreed
I know so many attorneys who hate their career. Their parents forced them to enhance their status. We’ll done.
And my mother didn’t want to teach me anything about homemaking or cooking and she also emphasized keeping my money in my own name.
So you managed to steer your daughter from a helping profession to one that is corrupt and feasts on the misery of others.
A huge reason men don't get into teaching is it is so poorly paid for the educational requirements. Men who do enter often quickly get into the higher paid administration roles. As far as college education, there are very few reasonably paid jobs realistically open to women which don't require at least some college. Men still completely dominate most of the trades (electrician, plumber, mechanic, etc), so a lot more of them decide to go that route instead of college.
Right. College isn't the best way for everyone to get ahead. Gotta look at your skillset and match it there. I have a Doctorate and many truck drivers make more than me. I had to wait 8 years to start earning not that I didn't work through college, but a tradesman was earning at 18. So now your $100K in the hole if you're lucky while your skilled trade counterpart has been earning for 8 years. Call it $40K on average and you are 26 and $420,000 in the hole in net earnings. Good luck college grad.
@@SLCSStrengthCoach I learned HVAC from my father and combined it with an electrical engineering degree to get into building automation. I’m currently making over 6 figures and I can easily demand more raises even in a recession because there is such a major shortage of people with my hybrid expertise. I was literally too smart to stay in academia. Graduated with a 3.9 gpa from the 9th ranked EE program in the world.
Trades are the way to go because that’s the future people are always going to need plumbers, electrician, handyman while if we can’t even get a handyman they are making six figures and up. They are so in demand.
I am a man who quit teaching because of a hostile work environment where I was called a f*gg*t, groomer, and pedophile... I was dismissed and gaslit by the union rep, HR, and administration. I was put in a closet where I was just doing clerical work because I "wasn't respecting others opinions and beliefs". Most people have abandoned reason and rationality. Unfortunately, people believe men are sexual predators and this bias creates hostile work environments for men around youth.
@@jl8942 I hear you my man. I have been teaching 20 years and have seen some of the same things. I have not been called those names, but I have seen the incessant push to promote (be an ally of) others beliefs which run counter to my values. I have about 15 years left to go before I can retire, and I am truly worried that I will be forced to leave my calling, not because I'm not a good teacher, but because I will be forced to compromise my principles one too many times.
My dad was a high school biology/science teacher, and when I was considering a career in science he warned me away from teaching. My mom was a teacher too (elementary music), so to some extent I gravitated toward teaching.
He told stories of belligerent administrators, shamefully disrespectful students, mis-allocation of limited resources (new sports facility, but science books that were literally falling apart), administrators who changed grades upwards to meet quotas/benchmarks or stating that no student can fail and everyone must get at least a C, and parents who blamed teachers for Little Precious' failure to turn in assignments or failing tests.
So I got my BS in geology with a math minor, and then a MS in hydrogeology and went to work for a Fortune 500 engineering firm as an environmental scientist. I still think of how much I'd have liked to teach, but then discuss the issues with friends that are teachers who describe work conditions that are *much* worse than what my dad described AND low pay.
@HydroAC I'd like to see more people like you go into teaching in semi-retirement. With your real world experience you'd be an asset and example for kids, and with emotional and financial stability you'd be somewhat insulated from the administrative crap. Unfortunately teaching can't attract many best and brightest because of the hassle and low salary, so most teachers are rather average with little life experience gained before their teacher/administrator careers.
I am also in education and everything your dad said is true. Still, despite falling standards and administrative blundering, I have enjoyed every moment I have had in enhancing the lives of these kids. I am a bit of a fossil hound and geology nut myself and have had some wonderful experiences introducing elementary kids to the world around them. Money isn't everything. In fact, it is largely meaningless in the grander scale of things. Helping millionaires find oil isn't what I'd call a life pursuit.
I thought of going for my MS in hydrogeology. I’m just bothered by the fracking industry which is where I’m seeing the jobs. Plus I’m a woman and I’m 53 so I’ve got two things that would weigh against me as a candidate. It is likely I would be saddled with more college debt that I can’t afford to pay. I have yet to be hired in any related field with just my B.S in Environmental Science. Graduated in 2014.
we disrespect most professions ,,, we have a sick society that glorifies the few
@Peter from NZ It is a side effect of a culture under-valuing intellect and education in general. No teacher takes it on as second full-time job. It is a chosen career. I know many teachers who work a second job to make ends meet. Sad commentary at a time when curiosity and intelligence are so needed. Politicians and administrators have made a mockery of the teaching profession. Teachers are now props in the imaginary culture wars, a position they never imagined themselves in.
The last thing any society needs is too many young men with nothing going on, idle
American ISIS is gonna be lit. 🔥
By the time the powers get around to admitting it and start to try and turn it around it will be too late. Then we can gleefully sit back and watch the world burn!😂
Yup, it's the kindling of revolution and regime change. All it takes is enough generations of boys and men struggling like this and a trailblazer or charismatic populist and it's a wrap.
A problem for society and women but not for men.
Not a new issue merely a newly noticed one. There's a graph, showing a nearly perfect straight line drop in mens labor participation rates from 98% in 1950 to 89% about a year or two ago. The graph shows this number drops by about the same percentage every year almost exactly.
Men are slowly figuring out that they really don't need society.
THAT is the problem.
Coming from Germany, living in the US, I am very surprised at how society disadvantages women in the US. One always points to the education system as a beacon of female empowerment when actually a critical factor is financial support, social and healthcare support and employment security for women during maternity. The US is extremely underdeveloped in this area compared to many European countries.
They say men are disadvantaged here, but they're not, American men are the biggest babies on the planet. We have a slogan, "boys will be boys" to basically excuse how mentally incapable and weak they are from birth. If they had athletic ability they were passed through English and Math. If they could pay, the big important schools which just give them the degrees if they had the right alumni. The higher up you go in America, the dumber the men get. Most companies are run by the Father's idiot offspring that never deserve the job or title. Now in America, when women find out it's a boy, they abort it. We have a current song that says, why give birth to that which destroys you.
They've also showed us how the wars didn't go like they said, so American men have NEVER been all that. Alfred Hitchcock produced our war reels with blow up tanks in many instances. You know what men brought home from the war, documented by the tens of thousands, stds. Yup, that's what they brought home to their wives. There are so many assault babies in France by American men they have an assault American war baby fund as abortion back then illegal. Start looking into the medical and financial records of the wars. If it's not beer, football, porn, guns, watching themselves lift weights in a mirror, video games or violence, then nothing men do in America will interest you. Now men and women are really at war here, they want to force breed us again. Doing away with legal age to marry in many states, but still have to birth the baby even if raped. You can see the writing on the wall with that one.
@@juliebella1221 you are not going to make the world a better place with that extreme antisocial view. Too often weak minds make this about a war of the sexes. Do you have sons and daughters, a father and mother? You should realize that disadvantages for women is not good for fathers, husbands or sons either. We need to make things better together, not fuel a divide
@@dickelstephen Too late. Generations of women are leaving men from young to old. Should've seen all the Grams watch Roe get turned over. They were all like just don't bother with men anymore. They never listen to us. We already fought this fight and here we are again. Men aren't even in our life plans anymore. We buy our houses in our twenties all by ourselves and call it a day. Every girl, woman or wife I've EVER spoke to all say they fake it as the dudes ego too fragile to know how bad he is in bed and they get themselves to oh lala. Third world countries wait for failed American men to show. It's not just me who knows this. Go to TJ and see your men in uniform in action. Or anywhere an American military base is. If a group of women or girls was walking towards you vs a group of boys or men walking towards you, you would be less wary of the group of women. Fact. Men themselves are wary of other men. Why men afraid of prison? Other men. Animal nor human feels safe around men. Fact.
Yea, we know.
You are so right!!!!
Surprise! Mentorship from someone you identify with will help more than everything else you can throw at a growth. If we want to live in a world that includes everyone, people need to be nurtured to discover themselves - usually by someone they can actually admire and respect. Looks like a good book and I have a son, so I am going for it!
Great comment. I have read several dozen excellent ones under this video, all good, but this is among the very best IMHO! In my own life experience, and from listening to others over the years (I'm in my mid-60s), mentorship seems to make a vast difference -- not just in practical terms (economic success later on, etc.) but also in psycho-social terms and psycho-spiritual development. To become a whole and healthy person, who can connect and relate well to others. And to recognize and stay away from evil influences, such as pornography and illicit drugs / smoking, etc. Saying no to the bad stuff is important too. Back in earlier decades, there used to be classroom films made and shown in school, with practical instruction. Example: some of them would include warnings about "Stranger Danger". Another form of very helpful media, IMHO, is the educator Fred Rogers (1928 - 2003). He was the creator of the children's television show "Mister Rogers' Neighborhood", which I wish was more widely shown and proliferated (i.e., more available for ordinary children to watch nowadays). For what it's worth, following is one exception to that. It can be accessed by either clicking on the link below, ... or else through doing an Internet search of:
watch full length episodes of mr rogers' neighborhood
and selecting one of the first Google results (returns) offered.
If interested, here is my attempt to share a link:
www.misterrogers.org/watch/
In my own observations, "video games" are another peril, for young men especially. They are addictive, and fostered by an evil industry (much like porn). Leads to mind rot, and a wasted life. It's brought about the ruin of many a young man.
Nope it is all the fault of women, minorities, and illegal alien, and Democrats.
The middle-class had been destroyed in case no one's noticed.
I’m feeling like this should maybe be broken down differently to get to the real truth. For example, completely separate the genders. Compare the boys of today with the boys of 60, 40, and/or 20 years ago. Is it possible that the boys have actually stayed the same, while the girls are finally allowed to live, learn and earn up to the ability that they always had but were prevented from fulfilling?
Yes! Someone else said it.
Hahahha. So women are just naturally smarter and superior? It's the old feminist delusion!
The issue is developmental age: When boys and girls are in the same grade at the same calendar age, some of the boys are effectively younger in terms of maturity, brain, executive function, ability to handle challenges, etc.
Why would that change young men though? Young men have no direction in life today because the mainstream feminist narrative teaches us its toxic for young boys to do traditionally masculine things.
@@dragonbeardable Please describe a traditionally masculine behavior that you would consider healthy that you observe being called toxic. I can point to lists of toxic masculinity and healthy masculinity, but I want to see where we diverge or converge. This can be enlightening.
Time well spent listening to this. Thank you for bringing us this and the recent Scott Galloway interview about his book "Adrift: America in 100 charts". The theses of these two books together tells us that America (and the UK) is in big trouble. Politicians & journalists need to get serious and stop behaving like society is a circus where we can indulge the clowns and the archetype 'evil genius'. Things are falling apart and if the grown ups don't take charge soon the rot will be terminal.
Agreed.
It's already too late to change the trajectory I'm afraid.
Thinking realistically about the Future that we're in Now. The struggles for power. Whose vision of the future are we in right now?
unfortunately we like to behave like childish imbeciles instead of responsible adults ... corporations and media out for fast buck, future be damned
@dominicesteban rice *"Politicians & journalists need to get serious and stop behaving like society is a circus where we can indulge the clowns and the archetype 'evil genius'."* - Well said, but there is a third group--just as complicit--that sometimes goes overlooked here: the people.
Murdoch has an empire because people buy his culture-war bs, tailor made for them. Trump and BoJo's power comes from their loyal followers.
In a world where Liz Truss, Reese-Mogg, Donald Trump, and Mitch McConnell are seen as "of the people", we are totally screwed.
It'd probably be helpful if American voters stopped re-electing clowns and 'evil geniuses'.
I have noticed in my family that our young men are struggling more than women and wondered why. I hope these suggestions can be used to improve their lives
Same
Because the women we are surrounded by are HORRIBLE.
Bros before 304s.
*Dating was always hard for men cause women are hypergamous, they date upwards with age & statu$, men date downwards* . Social media made things a lot harder cause women get an *insane* amount of attention & validation to the point they're *pedestalize* & believe they're special. They're even getting flown out to hang out with celebrities & experience luxury lifestyles...Men are a lot more feminine cause they were raised in single mother households. Some are lazy who play video games & smoke weed all day. They also waste time *simpin* over women on the internet. Feminism has caused a lot of damage too (some women are regretting it now)...What the manosphere/redpill does is motivate men to get their shit together & *build themselves up* . Whether it's with finances, fitness, status, etc. They also help men with *understanding* women nature, cause women are sophisticated creatures
There are other factors. Social media, pressures around body image, coupled with either an absent or emotionally stunted father all have massive impact. Teaching your boys critical thinking (especially around advertising), problem solving, rough and tumble and controlling or channeling your strength and the ability to acknowledge you were wrong and to apologize and make it right are all so hugely important. That, and getting them help external to the school system (which lets be honest doesn't cover all the bases for those who struggle). Give them the tools that will enable resiliency, self-worth and to take on the challenges in life.
Your last sentence speaks volumes. Without those abilities and skills in life, many will resort to becoming a bully at work, home, and in social settings.
@@randibgood The myth of the alpha male coupled with total emotional immaturity. Sadly, I think you're right. Thank you for the kind words.
Stu, this is one of the best comments here. So true.
I agree with every thing you said. The most important thing in all of this is having healthy parents/caregivers and that goes for everybody regardless of gender. In a healthy home people will get the tools necessary to do well in the world most importantly having healthy self esteem and boundaries and everything else that comes from the most important teachers in everybody's life, their caregivers.
Such great comments here. 🙂👍🏻
It is so incredibly rare and refreshing to hear about these topics without the usual political bluster typically associated with it.
For me at least I feel that having witnessed all the hallmarks of adulthood that my parents achieved be denied to me has left me feeling like a failure. Can't have a family if you can't support them. Can't get ahead because we're stuck renting most jobs don't pay enough to survive let alone get ahead. There is no ladder to climb anymore. You either win the birth lottery or you struggle and die.
Girls are experiencing the same thing. It's called living as a millennial...
Same. I'm female and am still paying massive student loans. Probably won't have kids. I can't afford them in time or money.
@@erinh9267 The difference is that for low-income potential females, relying on hypergamy to compensate for that dilution in economic outlook is considered normal and expected. But the same Hypergamy-seeking coming from a low-income male is considered off-putting and summarily laughed out the building by the female cohort. Misandry run amok.
@@erinh9267 He didn't say anything about his experience being rooted in his gender, yet you read it that way. Why? It seems obvious his comment was meant to encompass all young people in a similar situation.
Is there something you're picking up on here that I missed?
What’s stopping you from learning a trade or going to a Bootcamp. Boom.. high paying job & your own family
Our sons need education in emotional intelligence.
And our daughters need education in self control.
@@JeffCaplan313 If boys and men were more emotionally intelligent, they would be better leaders. Girls and women would be of a totally different mind set.
Emotional intelligence is what an English Major would call an "oxymoron", meaning two contradictory words put together.
Emotional intelligence is essentially an attempt to validate a less valuable trait commonly held by women and also turn little boys into little girls.
It has no real relevance, only for itself and it's benefactors.
@@chocolaza If girls and women were more accountable for their actions, you wouldn't be blaming men.
But perhaps it's time for the world to acknowledge that women have less free will than men. That women ARE lesser than men.
Is that the kind of emotional intelligence you're looking for?
@@professordogwood8985 being intelligent and understanding of all sides of your person doesn't equate turning boys I to 'little' (?) girls.
Put the same AMT of input to both have come to where we are. Thankfully.
Women and girls have always been less than, so this is far overdue. We are separate, yes, but also equal. Yes.
It bothers me that the lowest level of "higher education" is a 4 year degree. Trade schools exist, and they churn out quality plumbers, electricians, carpenters etc. every day, most of whom are men. The reality is higher education is not as important anymore. I don't understand why we care so much if not as many men know the difference between a conjunctive and an adjective. We have too many teachers and writers and journalists and marketers and not enough tradesmen. Which is why everyone who goes to a 2 year school trade school that I know is earning as much or more than people who got a "higher education", and they did it in half the time and with less than half the debt.. I agree with this guy that men struggle more in school, but that is only true when it comes to traditional education, not vocational education.
The skilled trades are not only in high demand and pay well but they cannot be outsourced.
Thank you for bringing up the fact that a college education isn't always needed to live a good middle class lifestyle
Young people from both genders are struggling more than ever before.
Young people!? Tu€& society!
We are just so far behind other countries who offer a great focus on the trades. Boys and some women who tend to be more tactile/kinesthetic learners and thrive in work and learning situations which are three dimensional and hands on- This is going to be a problem for our economy and is definitely leading to the mental health issues and aggression we might see in men and boys
@Random Old Lady - The idea of different learning styles has fallen out of favour in modern education theory. I'm not saying this is a good or bad thing: I'm neutral on the topic, honestly. Many US state curricula still push it, but researchers are trending away from it.
There's some interesting reading online if you're keen.
I appreciate his insights, and think there is indeed a problem, but how is the fact that women start falling behind when they have children considered NOT a gender issue? It's not exactly the same kind of gender discrimination we saw in the 1950s, but it's obviously a type of gender discrimination. What a strange way for him to frame the issue. The modern workplace is obviously designed to prioritize the interests of men.
@E.D. *"how is the fact that women start falling behind when they have children considered NOT a gender issue?"*
That isn't what he said.
@@rickysoulless6534 who pays for the childcare while she works ? Who watches the children? No one ever considers that this cost falls on women. Even with a father that pays child support ,women are still the ones put at a disadvantage because they make less overall and then they have to pay for childcare when they go to work. The doctors appointments for children? The days off needed to attend to things in the child’s life fall on women. It takes two incomes to survive.
@@cstuartdc it takes two full time salaries and then some to support just two people, you are not considering the cost of childcare. It’s not possible when you have to pay for childcare for one of the full time workers who already makes less then the man.
This is math that anyone in this situation can do. Apparently you have never had to do this math,
@@rickysoulless6534 see…
I stopped reading after you made it sound like a choice.
It’s the “if she decides to have a child” part.
The government says you must cultivate a baby! No more choices!
Oh ok. Gender discrimination is a hoax and the suffragettes and civil rights leaders were all faking it too! Do you know how insulting that is? Women died just to have the right to choose. Women died to have the right to vote. But yea….it’s all a hoax because you found some stats that fit your narrative of “women are paid the same”
@@rickysoulless6534 also, women are barely “present in the room.” That’s why only 20% of congress is female. But yea….there is no discrimination going on! Pure fiction! Men would never try to keep women out! Hahahahaha! They do it all the time genius! I know you hear it and see the derogatory language and inability to even acknowledge a woman when she speaks within a group of men! It happens so much that if you are not aware of it by now than you are a participant and part of the problem.
My dad was dyslexic and enrolled in a technical high school in the 1930s where he learned a myriad of skills that served him all his life and allowed him to make a good living and have self respect. Over the years educational systems removed teaching technical skills and with the demise of unions over the years there were few opportunities to learn carpentry, plumbing, electrical skills, etc on the job. Our labor workforce with these skills is aging with few younger people to take their place. No wonder young people are discouraged and angry
This analysis has to go deeper. Something IS going on with boys and men. They are being less successful than they have been in the past. I believe their frustration with this can be seen in the increased level of violence, particularly gun violence, that we see in society today. It’s not just that boys are achieving less academically, it is that their role models- the image of the “successful male” have changed. It’s no longer the well-schooled individual, who is now considered to be elitist or effeminate, who is admired; it is the “Rambo” man of action. The truth is that boys need better role models in ALL levels of our society beyond just placing men in the classroom. While I agree that we want every person in society to be successful, I feel that this assessment will be interpreted by many that boys are failing because girls have been accommodated and received “special privileges” that boys have not gotten. The answer, for these folks then, would be to change society back to what it once was… repressive to women.
But were men really more successful in the past? Most men still seemed depressed and empty in the past and even with a job and higher income.
And I think part of the problem is men are taught success is money, attractive partners and power. Those are really empty and superficial values and the ones who I have seen achieved that "success" are still negative, toxic and depressed.
Agree that the “solution” is nuanced
Policymakers and interest groups with rigid agendas don’t do well at nuance (see: current conservative wars against everything)
It’s hard to push against culture norms and I think we already see in social sphere a backlash against the gains made by women. The relationship politics I see have become pretty toxic and scary for singles, for example.
Towanda *"This analysis has to go deeper."* - I think this is only fair to say *_*if*_* you've read the book. Otherwise we have no way of knowing how deep the analysis goes.
Interviews like this only hit the high points and/or a few select issues the interviewer is interested in exploring.
Why do you see society as more violent. Minus the auto rifles isn't the data showing LESS VIOLENCE?
@@erinh9267 - You're correct, but these are internet keyboard warriors you're dealing with. This isn't a data driven discussion: it's an emotive one. Bringing up the fact that violence has been on a steady decline doesn't "feel" true. Here's an exchange betwen Alysin Camerota and Newt Gingrich from 2016 that I find endlessly fascinating:
CAMEROTA: But violent crime across the country is down. We're not under siege in the way that we were in say, the 80s.
GINGRICH: The average American, looking at Dallas policemen -- and look at the states he listed. The Average American, I will bet you this morning, does not think crime is down, does not think they are safer.
CAMEROTA: But we are safer, and it is down.
GINGRICH: No, that's your view.
CAMEROTA: It's a fact.
GINGRICH: I just -- no. But what I said is also a fact. The average American feels -- when you can walk into a nightclub and get killed, when you can go to a party in a county government building and get killed, people don't think that their government is protecting them. When you have Baltimore, when you have policemen ambushed in Dallas -- your view, I understand your view. The current view is that liberals have a whole set of statistics which theoretically may be right, but it's not where human beings are. People are frightened. People feel that their government has abandoned them. 25 million Americans have dropped out of the middle class, according to Gallup.
CAMEROTA: Yes, well that's the economic figures that you're saying, though, unemployment has ticked down. But what you're saying is -- but hold on, Mr. Speaker, because you're saying liberals use these numbers, they use this sort of magic math. This is the FBI statistics. They're not a liberal organization.
GINGRICH: No, but what I said is equally true. People feel it.
CAMEROTA: They feel it, yes, but the facts don't support it.
GINGRICH: As a political candidate, I'll go with how people feel and I'll let you go with the theoriticians.
I'm pleased the following concept got a passing mention near the middle, but one thing that always strikes me is how time gets ignored in gender politics. One of the big reasons that there are still fewer women at the mentioned elite echelons is that reaching that level requires a 30-year career, meaning you're drawing from the demographics of people who were at college in the late 1980s. This is also why it's important to address men's issues now, because the impacts don't play out immediately - they will appear in various ways over the next 40+ years as the current generation age.
Well, it would be a marvellous change if rhe reverse situation will happen and women dominate that high echelons like man does nowadsys (and always have done) But i don't know if it will never happen there is Putin, Erdogan and other neanderthal bringing back again the importance of man trough war. In my country (Spain) Never still a woman prime minister. And in your country Hillary also didn't achieve the work. As a change would be nice if your prediction would be true. (and i'm one heterosexual man over 50 by the way not a woman) But i consider man rule have demostrated thorougly his incompetence if we want a peaceful thriving surviving world
The last 50 years have nothing to do with it. White Men have been in control since the beginning of time, no matter how incompetent. There is a glass ceiling they will not allow women to move beyond. The current level of corporate and government, across all ages, is still male-dominated. Women have been the majority of teachers in lower education for decades, but men have always dominated higher education, meaning nothing will change. Men's egos are too fragile to allow women to succeed, even though women excel. Men's salaries have not declined. Women's salaries have risen, but never to the degree that will equal or exceed men's pay rates.
That’s objectively false. Please learn how facts work. Women were very much in college in the 1980s, and definitely in the 1990s and 2000s… and so on and many brilliant women were denied moving up the ranks because white men hire other white men.
The reason few women are CEOs is because of good old fashioned sexism. The upper echelons of the business world is run by white men who prefer to hire white men for important positions over women who are equally qualified.
Thanks for the always helpful mansplaining ( justifying) gender inequality 🙄
It's a bigger problem. 30 years from now, men will likely still dominate in any position that requires years in a career. What kills women's career is the burden of family responsibilities. There is no silver bullet to that, as only women can be mothers.
@OtterMarten While suicide deaths are tragic, way many more women raise children than men die by suicide. And so by and large, men stay in their careers while women do not. If your point is that men are unhappy, four times more girls attempt suicides than boys. They may not be successful at actually ending their lives, but one has to be in a very bad place to attempts suicide.
An issue with boys and girls is lack of responsibility that is meaningful as they grow up. Do they contribute to the family? do they feel needed within the family? As a child we shared caring for the siblings or helping in the home.The emphasis now seems to be all on external success in sports or academia. There is a lack of duty to others that gives successes meaning. And that is vital whether the future is in a vocation or academia.
An excellent observation. I agree 100%. And to your point, I think that a sense of obligation to, and engagement with the local community has declined along with the decline of our expectation that our children contribute to the care and maintenance of family and home. It takes a village, as they say, but Americans have devolved to become all islands unto themselves. Which prevents the kind of community that enhances and enforces the crucial lessons learned from being held to reasonable expectation of contributing to the care and maintenance of home and family. A sense of commitment and of caring about the care and maintenance of our society and those who belong to it has not just dwindled, it's becomes more and more vilified each passing day. God forbid anyone asks WWJD and then "woke-ly" go and do it. Sadly, we're heading in the wrong direction.
Yes and perhaps many boys would benefit from being sort-of briefed and motivated on the school mission: here is why we need you to do this. You will be needed, and we need you to do this now. It's not just "homework" just because.
Nope it is all the fault of women, minorities, and illegal alien, and Democrats.
Boys need men in there lives who are positive role models,right now it seems on social media and in life in general many men behave in an angry,crass,juvenile way.
Look at the video games boys are playing, they promote violence and often violence on women. This isn’t new, remember almost 20 years back having to return a birthday gift back to another parent and asking “did you know the characters in this game are bashing each other with baseball bats?” Parents were/are often clueless sometimes as to the toxic culture in video gaming, the misogyny and violence. It’s very difficult to control access and exposure since it’s to a point where if they are not gaming, they are outsiders, not normal. It’s a huge problem with boys/teens wasting years, hundreds if not thousands of hours play video games.
The elephant in the room is boy's and men's easy access to horrific, violent, degrading p*rn. Many males have become addicted to it and brainwashed by it, and it's ruined them. It's the reason so many of them are "incels" and have become too afraid to approach or date women anymore. They don't seem to know how to relate to women in a normal, healthy way. And they don't make the effort to learn.
The story of women and girls progressing has a lot to do with necessity. I grew up with a single mother and it was expected that I would go to college and work toward a good job. Because that was my only avenue to a secure future. I think society has assumed that boys are in the power position so they don't have to try as hard and are now more likely to fall into the social trap of drinking and living recklessly in their teens and 20s because movies and music romanticize it. And the boys who don't do that are told they aren't "real men" by society. Part of it is attitude. Which is why that free Kalamazoo program resulted in 0 male grads.
@Laura Exactly. Women have been forced to evolve into overachievers. They have to work harder than their male counterparts to achieve the same or slightly less results. And women of color must work two and three times harder. It's neither a coincidence, nor a surprise.
The last two or three generations of girls (and especially poor, working class, and lower middle class girls) grew up seeing how society treated their mothers and grandmothers, and realized that the only way to better was through achievement, no matter what. On that note, it was disappointing to see that the speaker in the video didn't acknowledge the hell most women go through to obtain degrees in historically male dominated STEM fields. And it's double for women of color. Women and girls are making the choice to endure these systems because they have living examples in the elders that came before them that there is no other alternative.
Economic inequality is steadily getting worse. Most households can no longer survive on one income. For poor, working class, and lower middle class folks, gone are the days of marrying a man who has a job that can pay all the bills. And most women know that wasn't an ideal situation for the women who lived it anyway. So when the doors were finally opened to women and girls, they ran through them at full speed.
We should also not forget that even with all of this achievement, millions of women and girls are still left behind. We shouldn't allow the success stories to overshadow the many crushed by our broken systems. If we fix these fundamentally flawed systems, including societal norms and attitudes, the tide would be raised for boys, men, girls, and women. We could create a society where everyone can live a life of peace and dignity.
I would agree with this. My mom was very intent on pushing me into a career (80s)...corporate offices were still super sexist at the time but I still pushed upward. Had I been able to have a daughter I would have pushed her to a higher educational level than me.
FACTS!❤️
@Laura *"Part of it is attitude. Which is why that free Kalamazoo program resulted in 0 male grads."* - Why is it so popular in America to assume you know things without bothering to ask questions? Sometimes I think it's just part of the hubris of the culture. Other times I think it's rooted in being too lazy to ask the questions, and then being too lazy to do the work of answering them.
But honestly I have no idea, so I won't come to a conclusion as to why so many Americans think they have answers.
@@ajmeyers5661 It is a problem. :) Let's change "is" to "might be". Now it is a hypothesis.
As an investor in Tanzania, I believe it’s important to point out that I have never been conned by a woman.
You either haven't been in business long or haven't dealt with many women.
Or if you had, just just haven’t figured it out yet. 😂
I have 2 exceptional children. My daughter is 30, my son 26 -27 in Dec. Shes a bartender. Loves it. She also excelled in school/sports. Excells at all jobs. Could do medical coding but prefers hands on labor! Totally helped my niece organize her organic farm duties. My son, excelled in high school/sports. Went to school for nursing, stopped to become a Firefighter, went back for his RN, is an EMT, & now doing paramedic training. Its parenting. Be a better parent than your own parents. Parents are a childs 1st teacher. Couldn't be more proud of both my babies!! They're the best;)
No offense, but you've failed as a parent if your daughter is a thirty year old, single bartender.
@@based3052 I found the Troll. Ass
How did she fail if her daughter loves what she does and is living comfortably off her wages?
@@based3052 ... Do you have any clue how much a bartender can make? No, you obviously don't. And you obviously don't understand that HAPPINESS with one's occupation is also very important.
@@JackOllie4 you're mighty perceptive! Please, enlighten me on the earning potential of bartending.
One problem is: For the first 20 years of your life in the United States, you are expected to be NFL TOUGH. Then, by the you are 30; women and some are asking you, "Why are you not sensitive?"
I believe you've articulated an important problem here. Why are parents still raising their boys to be emotionally challenged? What purpose does this serve in the 21st century? If the jobs of the future are going to require greater emotional intelligence, why are we not teaching boys to deal with their feelings AND educating them to do the jobs that will be out there? Our present "either/or" mentality isn't serving anyone well.
Sexist people expect you to be tough. Some girls are expected to be tough.
I grew up with male artists and musicians and female maths and firefighting enthusiasts. The field is nuanced
@@dottiebaker6623 Exactly. We need to stop handicapping boys from developing the soft skills they'll need on the job. If they're not allowed to express or even recognize entire ranges of emotions in themselves (alexithymia) how are they going to succeed at life? Especially in this stressful time?
What does education reaching boys vs girls have to do with dating challenges when you are in your thirties?
My boys were at a daycare where the primary caregiver was Mr John - a wonderful man in his 30s who made working with 4-7 year olds his career. My cousin, too, worked in a daycare (his FT job was professional drummer) - and he felt kids benefited from the different energy.
I see kids working all the time (anyone hear of a child star?) so have begun to rethink the outrage about kids working. It seems to be more of an attempt to prolong parenthood.
My mother was a school principal and testified that male early childhood educators were viewed with suspicion.
Such a shame.
@@professordogwood8985 Males are really viewed quite nastily. That is growing worse in the present age of Feminism and Preacher Abuse. Most men are not Preachers or abusive bosses. We are just folks who want to have a life. Anger has been a problem but we are learning to not hit, I think. It shows up a lot when job and home life becomes unsatisfying and we want out. I think that's what's unrecognized and it's attached to the stigma around being a quitter (loser).
Has he even considered how our culture doesn't encourage boys to be smart? We tell them they need to be in sports stars, not academics. What outcome do you expect when we give them that mentality?
That is utter nonsense. Our culture (the US specifically) encourages willful stupidity in the entire population, both girls and boys.
Here in the US, we have a scientifically illiterate culture that doesn’t understand how facts work or logical reasoning and thinks their individual uneducated unqualified useless opinion is as valuable as an expert’s.
But as always full of shameless confidence🙄
Seriously?? Engineering is very male dominated! Vast majority of CEOs are males
Not necessarily true. I think men are to be focused on academics if it leads to a lot of money like a doctor, lawyer or businessperson.
Bigger issue is men are too focused on making a lot of money and getting "paid" instead of going into a career they are passionate about or helping others.
@B L *"Has he even considered how our culture doesn't encourage boys to be smart?"*
Read the book and see if your claims/beliefs about what boys are taught are addressed.
People don't tell men anything, other than to "suck it up" when something bad happens
From what I can see very few parents are raising men. I see a lot of overgrown boys entering the workplace, but very, very few young men.
This. And what has taken it's place is the internet and gaming. Especially gaming.
@@awesum1075atl The gaming problem is huge. My son has the highest I.Q. in the family (134) but he only went to college because his rich grandma paid for it. He took his time with that. My daughter seldom gamed, but studied as soon as she got home to the point of exhaustion. She now has a Ph.D in human genetics, and her own lab with assistants at Penn State. There was nothing I could do about my son's gaming (long story I'll skip).
@@awesum1075atl Oh no *gasp* videogames.
I'm sure we'll all be shooting at people on the streets after playing Minecraft or a few hours.
See single mothers for that reason
@@alelectric2767 --OR-- perhaps absent fathers could be the reason? For every single mom, there is a father that may or may not be in the picture. Boys need more male role models showing them how to be responsible, compassionate, dedicated, hard working, dependable, loyal, etc. Seems more like a problem of absent fathers vs single mothers IMO.
This is a country whose attitude towards the teaching profession is summed up in the phrase: those who can, do; those who can't, teach.
Well said. You get what you pay for, and the US has decided not to pay their teachers a respectable wage.
And then they wonder why education is in such a state.
Exactly!!
This is a huge contributing factor to rising crime rates.
Every degree does not have equal value. Many graduates are underemployed ( do not work up to their skill kevel) and in debt. Women tend not to apply for roles unless they satisfy all of the requirements. More stratified data and a chart on whether the larger gaps were between females and males from lower income families would be useful. Many classes are still sedentary and structured like classes in the nineteenth century and haven't evolved to help children release energy regularly during the day. A wider variety of mentors and role models would be useful for all.
It's Shocking that someone pays any attention to males and their wellbeing!
Helping one should not neglect the other. One better than the other is something parents do when they limit their children based on gender. Promote a complete education for any child. This was very good information. I have more nephews than nieces by relation and more nieces than nephews by friendships. We need boys to become successful men so they can be healthy fathers, husbands and community members. We need women to be successful so they can be healthy mothers, wives and community members. The US is also lacking on Emotional Awareness which can impact school and professional success. This is aside from the income issues. We started hearing in the 70s that the job market would change. Anything that is us vs them or 'real' is damaging to all.
@T H *"Helping one should not neglect the other. One better than the other is something parents do when they limit their children based on gender. Promote a complete education for any child."*
It's a relief to read the rare, sane comment like this posted to the video. Cheers!
No one needs a "successful" woman...how do they define success, again?
I think it has something to do with size, visavie "bigger is always better"
"Successful women" is the reason this place is so fucked.
@@JeffCaplan313 You do realize all Victoria's Secret models are dudes. That's the secret. All famous feminists are dudes. Gloria SteinMAN. It is MEN dressed as women doing this to you buddy.
Elephant in the room: billionaires, tax codes favoring very few, the destruction of the middle class, the apex of a city or town center lost to shopping malls. I am a feminist and am completely and totally committed to boys' rights. My feminist credentials are human credentials.
♥ Boom.
I honestly think boys bigger issue is purpose or lack thereof. I’m not religious but I bet our society going more secular plays a role in this.
@@brianmeen2158 o don’t. Religion is a good control factor. At the end of the day the wealthy and powerful will do anything, anything not to share.
Nope it is all the fault of women, minorities, and illegal alien, and Democrats.
I'm a feminist and having husbands and wives both flourish is what's best for kids and society.
As adults why can we not hold two thoughts at the same time? This is silly. We can help boys and girls at the same time.
As a private tutor and teacher. Way more family's of lower middle class are willing to pay for a tutor for their daughters but few for their sons. Upper class family's pay for sons and daughters at roughly equal rates.
@Wade Gauthier - It's anecdotal data but at least it _is_ a form of evidence. Most of these comments don't even have personal anecdotes to share, yet are full of passionate claims anyway.
Thank you for sharing this. Now I'm curious to have a look round and see how common your experience is.
How strange.
Are parents investing in girls because girls may be more willing to take care of their parents in their old age ?
@@embarq12 - Please watch the video and try to keep up, dear. The investment in girls is a function of societal/governmental initiatives.
This isn't a case of of parents deliberately deciding to invest in the needs of one child while ignoring the needs of another, because they think there would be some long term benefit for themselves.
He's talking about things like girls-only STEM programs that were set up to address the disparity of male dominated science careers. And the promotion of women to STEM teaching positions, so that girls would have role models throughout their education.
Only an absolutely moral monster would look at their little baby boy and little baby girl and be "more willing to invest in girls" as a retirement plan.
Jesus Christ, I hope you aren't so morally bankrupt that this is something you'd do to one of your children...
This is real amongst young men who are from dysfunctional families. These young men do need help. In particular mental health as well as educational help.
Yes, also nutritional education and support. A lot of children diagnosed as ADHD have severe vitamin deficiencies and gut imbalances (often caused by antibiotics and pesticides) that are affecting their executive function.
So, I'm a guy who taught for ten years, and in the case of boys, I don't feel like the achievement gap is due to school policies, lack of role models, lack of opportunities, etc. The achievement gap largely boils down to how parents socialize their boys. They don't emphasize soft skills, communication, manners, etc. the way they do with girls. Parents today raise girls to be extremely well rounded. They don't do that with boys, especially as you descend the socioeconomic ladder. Boys are still told garbage like, "Be a man" or "Man up." Basically, bottle your rage and energy until you inevitably have an outburst. They're generally only given aggressive toys, or athletic toys. People don't give their boys toys that teach nurturing, media targeted towards boys is still very aggressive, while media targeted towards girls is all about cultivating friendships and interpersonal skills. When was the last time you saw a superhero solve a problem through mutual understanding and compromise?
People act like like the achievement gap is a systemic issue in schools, but the way people raise their boys has very little relevance today. English class is fundamentally about being able to communicate, and empathize with others through text. Boys aren't taught to examine their feelings. Of course they have a hard time dissecting the motivations of literary characters. Boys are taught that physical strength and toughness make "a man." There are no white collar jobs where those attributes are called for at all. Blaming parents for societal problems is always unpopular, especially when the issue is that they're "following tradition." In this case though, that's squarely the problem. If the way the achievement gap has flipped in the space of a few generations shows us anything, it's that many of these sorts of issues are caused by socialization. Your kids spend eight hours a day, 180 days of the year at school. That accounts for roughly 16% of their year. The rest of their time is spent at home. Fix parenting instead of blaming schools.
Once again this commentor defects by blaming the victims and shaming men and boys.
@@dabirdalton I'm hardly blaming boys by saying their parents are raising them with values that are out of sync with today's reality. If we still taught girls that their main value was to be pretty and have babies they wouldn't cope well with today's society either. That's basically what we're doing with boys. How many boys are taught nonsense like wilderness survival skills over social skills? That's ridiculous.
This is not based in reality at all. Nobody tells boys to man up. This is baseless
I wish more men would just let this corrupt system crash so we can rebuild with modern tech and systems.
The military has an interesting system. Advancement in rank happens through two criteria: time in, and skill acquisition. If you don't advance, attention is applied to you, or else you wake up and work on your skills. Everyone gets shuffled along, and you get meaningful responsibility early in life.
The military invests in their people in a way the private sector finds intolerable.
...and the military is largely socialist, which is something most Americans would recoil to hear.
As a man and step-dad to my son, I feel what the US needs most is to value education a lot more. I think women mature faster and wake up to needing higher education a lot faster than males do. When I was 20 the future was a month away at most, and women my age were no longer falling for the local rock singer and were getting college catalogs in the mail. Look at the immigrants who move here and seriously kick-butt in school. They are male and female AND come from a culture that values education. We don't live the 1950s when low skill could make serious $. Males will always mature more slowly than females. It's great that women don't face so many obstacles anymore but the men not doing as well as men in the 50s has to do with the nature of jobs these days. With automation, low skill jobs are going away. We need to make education one of the most important American values.
Agreed. I also think that women know they have a short time to establish a career if they also want to have a family. The men don't seem as rushed or as able to get on board with education as a whole.
Yes. We need the ERA to prevent us from going back further than we have now. Women are not treated as people.
I think the opposite. Higher Education has become nearly worthless. There's exceptions if your going into certain very specific fields (STEM, Accounting, Finance, Professional School, etc.), but most people who go to college do not major in any of those. Trades are far more lucrative right now.
@@jordanneedscoffee Disagree because many people do well in many fields they study in college and now you have to pretty much pick a major these days and stick with it, but even if you are correct on this that vocational skills are more lucrative on the whole which is a big if and not proven, why are men struggling in the workforce then? Not enough training for them in certain vocational fields? What are your fixes since they are clearly struggling college or no college?
@@shisiki-2649 I think having a lot of women criticizing you or having superior skills in an area growing up does have a detrimental effect emotionally for men. Men want a scapegoat and so go in a different direction. Makes sense emotionally especially as kids age and want to look to a male role model for becoming an adult. How many girls played teacher growing up? It was an ideal role model for them.
I come from a time when sexes were often seperated for schooling. The boys had male teachers who, I felt, even then, were better able to work with the issues of young men. Maybe it's time to return to that format. Boys & girls mature at different rates & learn in different ways. Lets gear learning to those curves.
You forget they did that and en mass boys were raped by their male teachers and clergy.
Boys and girls need to learn to work together. Also, non binary kids need education and should not be forced into declaring themselves male or female.
As much as US infrastructure needs overhaul, men can get out here and fix these roads, bridges, build electric trains, work on our water systems, our power grids!! Women can design but men can bring it to life!
In the country I grew up in the high school was set up so those wanting and testing as such went to college prep and those that had an interest and aptitude for welding or horse training went to school in the morning and to their master welder or master horse trainer in the afternoon where they worked towards their trade license. It wasn’t a male female thing that directed the trade choice or college choice, it was aptitude and interest.
What a novel idea.
The many denigrating, fallacious, and misleading comments about men in this thread amaze me. If any of you had wondered why men are retreating into their own worlds, here it is.
I grew up in lower class. Majority of girls outperform guys. I noticed families are putting more pressure and responsibilities on female, especially middle eastern and brown families. I think families should be more though on their sons.
I see this as a black American female as well. To me, lower class and certain ethnicities of people never seemed to shift out of certain outdated gender norms or had different societal structures to begin with that don't gel with what is needed in a modern society (especially in the US where various forms of social and educational inequality are prevalent) boys to thrive and girls to not end up burdened or resented by the boys. Or, in some cases, because groups of men were disadvantaged, certain groups felt that men shouldn't be expected to achieve at high levels
Agree. Girls have to succeed in school and then come home and do chores, maybe provide childcare for younger siblings, maybe cook.
Boys can slack off in school then run the streets and come home at midnight. Boys are given way too much freedom and it negatively affects girls.
Haha. And the interesting point is that women still expect to find an alpha male, who they can look up to, earns more and has a higher status in the society. And there you go, less marriages, less kids and more lonliness and depression.
I am 60 years old. When I was in school I was not guided toward math or science at all. Thank goodness they finally pushed females forward in this area. My sons friends who are all males are all top students and are going into engineering which a overwhelming male.
Even 10 years ago, a lot of these fields were overwhelmingly male. I worked at a (then) 15 year old tech company of 180 people. This company was well-known for their engineering talent. There were two female engineers. They were probably the top 15% in the company in terms of skill. They probably had to be to make it in. Glad things are changing.
@@cstuartdc How TF do you think "feminists" had ANYTHING to do with "pulling" men out of education? You're apparently not as intelligent as you think you are if you think that is how it happened.
I’m the same age and I certainly was directed towards science and engineering throughout my school years, esp in middle and high school.
@@cstuartdc The chickification of education started waaaaay back as public education expanded. States figured out they could pay women less for the same work (same old story), and it was one of the few legitimate careers for women. Women were kept out of the general workforce and men went on to compete for higher paying jobs (there were laws passed in the 30s that made it ILLEGAL for married women to work outside the home and were on the books in southern states until WWII when they needed women in the factories).
You ended up with A LOT of frustrated scientists, doctors, artists, and CEOs (women couldn’t sign for loans, they needed a man to cosign regardless of finances. ‘No honey, you can’t start your own business to compete with my friends. Back to the kitchen now!’) So when Congress started passing laws in the 70s to remove restrictions on women, the result was a brain-drain out of education into the private sector.
Combine that with a reversal of 30 years of liberal education spending on education (‘50s to ‘80) as Reagan’s administration started the process of defunding public education (whilst promoting privatization of the whole shebang) and you end up with a sector that the employees (teachers) have to constantly battle the institution (schools) to produce the product (education) for which they were hired!
I remember a teacher being forced to quit because she became pregnant.
Any thoughts on the influence of easily accessible porn, video games, and general culture?
@Jennifer E. Nordstrom - I'd suggesting reading the book to see if any of that is addressed. But if you want uninformed opinions, I can give you mine. There was a Satanic panic in the 70s(?) blaming all social ills on rock and roll music. In the 80s it was dungeons and dragons. In the 90s it was rap music. By the 2000s, video games. Maybe around the 2010s the devil swapped over to porn.
It's 2020, I think we need a new demon to blame all social evils on. How about vapping and weed?
Well then you'd have to blame the boys for what they do to themselves and that goes against this coddling of boys video. We all KNOW the real problem - what you wrote. And it's always been this way. How many households in the past decades women and girls were stuck listening to stupid men yell at the boob tube for football, pay per view or whatevs. They had to outlaw alcohol one hundred years ago because men were just as stupid and destructive then as they are now. Nothing new under the son.
@@juliebella1221 We are much more a product of our environments than we'd ever like to admit. We like to think we are propelled by our visions of and for ourselves, but the average person reaches for low hanging fruit.
Boys need direction, but it can't come through public schools because the direction needed is probably best in the form of men's groups involving morals, leadership, rites if passage and such.
Some things are more accessible than ever before and when boys have spiritual and psychological issues, they find distraction (if not outright hate) and resentment, totally disrespecting all the investments women have put into from their first breath.
Sadly, we are discovering that many priests and men who got into Boy Scouts were sexually exploiting boys there too. Maybe there aren't enough men investing in boys, and that's because the average man doesn't do anything unless he gets paid. Please notice I said average men. There are good men out there, and I think the numbers are increasing even though they struggle with the environment that disrespect women as well.
I held my son back a year and developmentally it made all the difference because he was able to focus more and to have a greater ability to manage his own wants and desires. He then by default could reason and process concepts more effectively. He currently has two male teachers and a male mentor at his freshman year in high school and I’m thrilled he’ll get to see different men teaching and sharing their experiences.
Affirmative action also greatly helps women.
Elementary school teachers were pushed to focus on encouraging girls into STEM and math for 20 years. This is the result. Extraordinary.
It is extraordinary but now we have an entire generation of groundless young men looking for meaning and usefulness. They are led by the nose by those who deny intellect and improvement for the evaporating moat of prior times. I live in a neighborhood filled with them. Toxic masculinity has been their only bequest. Where did the Trump voters come from? Right here.
The STEM fields are still dominated by men
IMO, we often have a myopic view of gender inequality! We focus on the world “out there,” which has traditionally and clearly disadvantaged working women! However, if we instead turn our attention to the world of feelings (affect) “in here,” boys and men have not yet had their liberation!
When males cannot express sadness, fear, grief and the like, because they often do no have the requisite interiority, an expressive language, or the support and encouragement of others (primarily other males) to describe what it is like for them “in there,” we have a male affective disadvantage. The results is the affect males are permitted to express - anger - is there in disproportion!
The structure of masculinity is fragile! Anger, despression, hopelessness, aloneness, especially among young men, leads to a host of social and vocational dysfunctions!
Traditional gendering has led to a too rigid separation of men “out there” and women “in here!” While that is changing, many boys and men, especially in working class families, are raised very traditionally. We should better realize that inequalities cut in all directions, and are not specific to women, blacks, gays and the like. Time to become more conscious of what we have created, and to be more even-handed in remediating our cultural biases!
I'm 65 years old and up until the the mid 80's the school district that I was educated in had tax paper high school vocational training before the funding for the program ended and that created LPN's, mechanics, carpenter and HVAC courses, they were tested by the state in order to qualify for employment, then for profit technical schools started cropping up everywhere, I felt it was money well spent, at least it kept people off public assistance and gainfully employed.
My entire life girls were expected to behave better than boys in many ways. We expect girls to behave and we communicate that to them in many ways. That includes sitting in a chair and reading, doing schoolwork and even crafts
Hmmm…I wonder why male teachers have left teaching…
Oh, yea! They won’t stand for the disrespectful pay and treatment! Why do female teachers stay? For some reason we either love teaching or feel that we have few alternative choices.
Men left teaching elementary school classrooms, because the parents started to accuse them of pedophilia due to the parent's misguided belief that the only reason a man would teach very young kids is because he "was attracted to them".
This was a very good insight and I'm glad I didn't scroll past it like I was going to because of the title. But listening to the author really had me thinking. Thanks.
Everybody is sitting on the ladder and shit only goes down.
Very interesting piece. I would've like to hear a little more about the WHY certain groups of boys/men are falling behind. The comments about boys needing more adult support re: completing assignments on time and "red-shirting" due to slower developmental timelines suggest perhaps "natural" gender differences, while girls needing less discrimination, more opportunity, and more role models suggest environmentally driven gender differences. I wonder about the cultural and other environmental influences on the outcomes of less privileged boys/men. For instance, what is society's view about boys/men pursuing "women's" work? Women tend to be over-represented in fields providing direct care to children, esp. younger children. These fields also happen to pay less and have fewer benefits. Meanwhile, men are in fact better represented in teaching fields at the high school and post-secondary level. Why? Could it be that those teaching positions are viewed less as "women's" work and more prestigious? As others have said, fields seen as more "manly" still suffer from over-representation of men (and minorities), such as trades and IT. So, the push for more men -- esp. men of color, esp. in the earlier grades, esp. in subjects traditionally seen as less "manly" -- to teach is a potentially helpful strategy. But more systemic level strategies might be needed to adjust what it means for a boy/man to be successful and why it's ok if there is overlap with what it means for a girl/woman to be successful. This piece might also want to bring up the urgency of dealing with boys/men feeling jilted while being owed something, because there are gender differences in how people respond to resentment, insecurity, and perceived injustice.
@Shade Tails *"I would've like to hear a little more about the WHY certain groups of boys/men are falling behind."*
This is a very good reason to buy the book.
"On many social and economic measures, Black men fare worse not only than white men, but white and Black women, as we show above. Part of the cause is that Black men are “uniquely stigmatized,” according to studies of implicit bias conducted by political scientists Ismail White and Corrine McConnaughy: more than 40% of white respondents rank “many or almost all” Black men as “violent.” White men are less than half as likely to be described in this way, at about the same rates as for Black women, while white women are very unlikely to be labeled as violent. It’s no surprise, then, that Black men are also more likely to be stopped by the police, more likely to be frisked, more likely to be arrested, more likely to be convicted, and more likely to be killed by law enforcement. As Rashawn Ray, a Rubenstein Fellow at Brookings argues, “Black men have a different social reality from their black female counterparts,” he writes. “The perceptions of others influence black men’s social interactions with co-workers and neighbors [and] structure a unique form of relative deprivation…In this regard, the intersectionality framework becomes useful for illuminating black men’s multiplicities and vulnerabilities.”" I hope they also explore the cultural expectations of Black men from the Black community. Just ask Black women, esp. those who serve as primary breakwinner, about the reasons Black men are struggling to keep up. www.brookings.edu/blog/up-front/2020/11/19/the-challenges-facing-black-men-and-the-case-for-action/
Oh, and ask Black men about their views of gender roles and expectations of themselves.
These are all great questions, and the willingness to explore biases will surely lead to realizing how they can be co-opted to the benefit of others. Usually the answer is money.
@@Commentator488 Bad logic. In the 1800s-early 1900s any shade of red was considered too violent for girls, so boys wore pink and girls wore blue. Attitudes on a subject can flip over time. And there have always been outliers for any activity. So just because someone in the outgroup was involved does not change the overall perception.
And yes, the earliest precursors to computers were the pattern cards for weaving looms, no doubt designed by women.
The opportunities do come to men. However, since so little effort is geared towards us, we generally recline from the world while women end up doing everything. It's an unhealthy scenario and eventually it's going to crack.
He's basically saying that class matters.
You mean that trying to promote equality between men and women by raising women from the bottom only succeeds in creating inequality between the somewhat-raised women and those men who continue to be at the bottom(and resentment from said men), while at the drastically higher top the men who have control of everything continue to be at the top? Not too difficult to predict it, really.
I think he's saying a *_*lot*_* more than that, but I agree that's one of the things he's saying. He's also saying we need more male teachers and programs to benefit boys, modeled after the successes we have with programs designed to benefit girls.
I'm sure the full book will also present far more arguments than the interview could make time for.
@Kaci - I agree class matters. I don't agree with the OP that the author is "basically saying that class matters". I think he's saying a lot of other things matter as much, and a focus on class as 'basically the thing that matters' risks that we'll over priortise.
Putting more male teachers in public schools as instructors and administrators isn't a class issue, in my view. Designing after school and scholastic programs for boys--modeled on those we designed for girls--likewise isn't a class issue, as far as I can see.
Initiatives to achieve these goals could be planned out at the state and federal level to benefit children of all communities.
Just my two cents on the matter obviously. Cheers!
@Kaci - Unlike some of the other people commenting on the channel you seem like a decent person. But we're talking at cross purposes. I've explained why I don't think having male teachers and/or programs for boys is inherently a class issue: there are programs for girls that are accessible to low income and wealthy families alike, and initiatives to fund male teachers and administrators could be enacted at the state and federal level, bypassing the crass way funds are doled out in some school districts.
Since we seem to be talking past one another I'll leave it here and wish you well.
Cheers.
Most importantly why do we have such a gigantic wealth Gap in our country. Main problem ruining our country.
If anyone manages to solve this, they deserve the Nobel for Peace
@@ajmeyers5661 get money out of politics. Reverse citizens united. I only vote for progressives who don't take handouts.
This was a very thoughtful and excellent interview and a book that I definitely want to read.
I believe this scenario has a bearing on the turn to the right in politics.
Absolutely.
The democratic party and the progressive wing have almost nothing to offer men. People tend to vote for a party that sells them a world they want to be a part of. Democrats have been heavy on supporting women, and there is effectively nothing for men.
Meanwhile the Republican party is doing things like suggesting they'll return to the old, traditional ways when men were valued and respected on a cultural level. Whether this is true or not remains to be seen, but it has clearly worked since minority men have begun flocking to Republicans.
The way to battle this malaise that plagues men today is to fight toxic masculinity. It’s no accident that men are more likely to commit s*incide than women. Boys need to be taught that connecting to their feelings, being vulnerable and open minded are tools that will only help men achieve better outcomes in life.
I never figured I'd hear the words "being vulnerable" and "better outcomes" in the same sentence.
@@brian5001 Fear of what?
@@StoneAgeWarfareyou obviously have a lot of emotional growing up to do then.
Ms. Amanpour; You're one of the rare people I would trust w this topic.
I am glad this matter is discussed and written about.
Richard Reeves is the man!! Love his brilliant book, "Dreamhoarders", about the top 19 percent upper middle class while they've "left the rest in the 80 percent in the dust! So apropos these days, unfortunately! Thank you Amanpour & Co, will add this recent book to my ever long reading list! "knowledge is power".....self-empowerment!
3:46 "Most American men makes less now than most American men did in 1979." What happened in the 1980s and since? Reaganomics. Trickle down economics has nearly destroyed opportunity for most Americans. Now we compete to subsist. Vote blue.
It's incredible to see the absolute shitshow of an administration and general ruin the U.S. lies in only to have someone still say 'vote Blue.' This species is beyond fucked.
Great!
I’m looking forward to the day when we have 9 women in the Supreme Court.
@Lumberjack Dreamer - Really? You'd rather have nine Amy Coney Barretts? If I were forced to choose between nine ACBs and nine Thurgood Marshall's, I'd go with the latter.
But you do you, boo
@@ajmeyers5661
I hope we can move beyond the red hat weirdos.
I hope trump-Putin will go away for good.
Then we can have reasonable people in congress and yes, nine reasonable women in the Supreme Court.
@@lumberjackdreamer6267 As I've said, given the choice of nine ACBs or nine Thurgood Marshalls I'll have the latter. You're welcome to your choice of sexual politics over good jurisprudence though. It's still a free country, so you do you boo.
I'm just pleased I have the means to move with my family to a civilised country that values all its citizens, should your vision of gender uber alles gain traction.
Cheers!
@@ajmeyers5661
We’re not asking you to chose. Stay in your lane.
First, we need to imprison trump, get rid of the red hat sheeple, reclaim our country, move forward with progress and liberal values.
Then we’ll chose competent women to serve on the Supreme Court. No more weirdos.
@@ajmeyers5661
How well do you understand English? Are you Russian?
i really appreciate the nuance and care that the author has. very refreshing!
Women should not be flying fighter jets. Let's make that absolutely clear.
In my senior year of high school in English class, I was having a back and forth about an element of a book we had just read. The discussion touched on a topic we had learned about the year before in history class. I looked over at the girl next to me, and I said "you have no idea what we're talking about do you?" She said she didn't. I said "we learned this last year in history class. You got an A on the test and I got a C." She confessed again she remembered none of this. My "C" grade was lower than hers, but I actually thought about the stuff we had learned. Probably, I just didn't find 20% of the information we had learned to be very interesting, so I didn't file it away. But I added what I did find interesting into my memory. She, on the other hand, memorized for the test, dumped all the data. So how do we take that into account? How do you grade for that? How do you grade for a student who is truly engaged but not exactly making the effort to get high grades VS a student who is engaged for the sake of grades? I think the answer is that you don't, and that our entire education system is just measuring the wrong things.
Also, the dumbing down of education is incredibly demoralizing for people who do take an interest in the topics. And that is, so a friend tells me, based on a misreading of Dewey.
Well, capitalism and most jobs are like this, though - you work to collect a reward that is set out by other people. Whether she forgot everything afterwards because she found it uninteresting does not matter as long as she has figured out how to game the system. If you or anyone else learned for self-development, the question of "How do you grade for that" is simple - you don't. remembering what you found interesting is the reward in itself.
I believe CEOs tend to be older, so the stats haven't yet caught up to their bracket. Like any wave, it can only move at a certain speed. It will be interesting to see if more college degrees presages more executive arrests in future years, and whether it will be linear or still lag.
Yeah, but the average CEO age is probably going lower as well. There’s still not a lot of successful millennial female CEOs compared to male CEOs.
A female psychologist wrote a book on this very subject about 10 years ago. She had a son and was concerned that he was falling behind and wanted to investigate why.
There is nothing stopping men from getting an education, nothing. If they choose not to get an education or develop marketable skills; well they are free to choose. Choosing to complain instead of competing, that's on them.
Sorry, but I'm an old white guy and just because women (and minorities) are starting to finally get equal treatment in our society, I don't have much sympathy for these whining guys claiming they're now feeling put upon. Everyone getting to participate equally in our society is good all the way around.
"Participate Equally" that's Not really true. Men have always borne the huge burden even in families
The pay gap is not always related to parenting. Most of the childless working women I know are struggling with low pay; the childless working men I know are paid well. Anedotal evidence yes, but it can't be merely a coincidence. Especially since a boss once told me the reason the company didn't pay me more or promote me was because I was an attractive woman and they assumed I would marry and take time off to have kids, so why invest in me? This is the expectation, even when women choose not to have children.
Men still don't see education as important, but women/girls do. That is why girls are succeeding academically than boys in k-12 and post high school. Until we see education as important, men aren't going to participate. A lack of male teachers today means boys, who don't have a positive male role model or any role model at all find themselves looking to the wrong type of male adult role models ie professional athletes, musicians, actors (at the macro level) or local criminals or even abusive male family members (at the local level)
I'm curious to see how and/or if this information on men's income changes since 1979 takes into consideration manufacturing moving offshore to China. These individuals didn't need to get a 2 or 4 year college degree to get paid well. Their unions helped them maintain a living wage unlike today's work wage environment.
Paradox is the nature of life. Everyone who tries to over simplify a thing is likely selling something. I appreciate this discussion.
I think maybe in past generations, when women were blatantly excluded, (white)men were more privileged in that the world catered to them and while a woman would have to be the best of best to get respect, men just have to show up to get the same respect.
Now that SOME progress toward gender equality has been made, some of the past automatic privilege they enjoyed for centuries has decreased in some professions (although there are still plenty of male dominated professions that remain hostile to and exclude women) but the entitlement of (white) men remains the same expecting unearned privilege and in some cases are unprepared to learn that unlike their father’s generation, they now actually need to prove their worth.
Wow, I think you hit the nail on the head!
This is utterly idiotic. Even my mother is horrified at the way her mother treated my grandfather. Guess what happened?
this is the problem.
anytime you try to talk about people start derailing it with "what about women"
Clearly hypergamy is the problem. How does a male make more money with equality? 50+% of men are invisible to women. What incentive/purpose is there for these men to work? Gov assistance is over $2K/month working part time, why work hard when you can play and enjoy other things in life. In general, women are the materialistic ones that pushed men in relationships to be in servitude and do more. As the matriarchy forms, it is now the women who will be working and supporting the men via gov programs.
I got the impression he was saying that women’s status and pay, as well as entry into certain professions has improved by almost 40% in a couple of fields (i.e. STEM) so we’d better stop that trend now so that men can catch back up. 40% isn’t very much considering the historical record of how long women were not even allowed in those professions at all, and considering it’s only in two fields he mentioned: STEM and Law. I don’t think men (or society) needs to freak out just yet over that. Women are hardly “taking over the country” just yet, not even close. Why don’t we help women reach EQUALITY in ALL positions, whether vocational, academic or corporate or political or whatever fields they might be interested in. No need to “keep men down”; they (men) will also need help receiving the best education in whatever field they’re interested in as well. We should keep on with that system until all work situations in all businesses are 50/50 men and women, IF there were 50% of women who would want to be in a particular field. If not filled right away to 50%, keep the position open until a woman applies for it. I guarantee it won’t be empty long.
I think a wonderful solution, for men and women both, would be to enshrine the Equal Rights Amendment in the Constitution (since it has already been ratified by the required 38 states as of January, 2020, so the 2-year “waiting period” has also already been satisfied). Everybody seems to think the ERA is ONLY about women’s rights (even though that was its PRIMARY intention), it doesn’t even mention women, per se. The text of the ERA says, “Equality of Rights under the law shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any State on account of sex”. Period. That means that men shall have the same rights as women and vice versa. EQUAL rights. For everybody. Everybody freaks out over it because they seem to think it will make women “more equal” (an oxymoron) than men. Equal means equal. Period. End of story. Can’t we realize that it will help EVERYONE? But, of course, they’re fighting against it in Congress right now because so many male Congressmen (Mitt Romney for one) just can’t stand the thought of women being equal to men, as demonstrated just this year - in the 21st Century no less! - by SCOTUS taking away a Constitutional right from women that they’ve benefited from for 50 years! If we had put the Equal Rights Amendment into the Constitution that couldn’t have happened. But that’s beside the point of the discussion here. I hope you can see how the inclusion of the ERA into the Constitution could be used to help everyone, male or female, or LGTBQ+. Please call and/or send letters to Biden, Harris, your Senators and Representatives pushing them to do this since it will help everyone. The problems in education and the workplace as described in the book discussed shouldn’t have anything at all to do with gender, but about our government’s desire and ability to help ALL it’s citizens through educational, economic and labor standards.
Male's limited roles of protector/ provider are threatened not by women but by economic structures changing and insistence of valuing traditional roles. Find more ways to feel valuable than control and power.
Hello. The disparate differences between boys vs girls described in the book is not new; girls/women have always been ahead in the stem classes, than boys/men by at least a year in emotional and educational development; this is not surprising; I am 83 years, went to a one room school house with all eight grades and my mother was the teacher; I saw the premise of the book back then. The research is right and appropriate for our time. Practicing law for 51 years solo. Victor 😇💃
@Victor V *"The disparate differences between boys vs girls described in the book is not new; girls/women have always been ahead in the stem classes"* - Not according to the research, Victor. If you have other data to draw from that can cast doubt on the author's scholarship then please do provide it.
*"The research is right and appropriate for our time."* - What does this mean?
Listening to how this issue affects the Black Community helps colour a lot of issues that do extend into the present.