The thing that helps me the most is meditating, and being present, aware. When I look in the mirror and I learned to be present and in the moment, I'm more able to catch myself trying to pick and stop in time. Also, looking at yourself in the mirror and telling yourself that your skin is not supposed to be perfect and really observing it from a detached point of view. I tell myself that when I look at others I don't study all their blemishes, so why do I do it to myself? No one scrutinizes me like I do and so no one pays attention to my imperfections. I should see myself how others see me.
You really hit the nail right on the head in this video. I realized after years of trying to control my skin picking that trying to motivate myself through the improved appearance of my skin was fueling the very belief that causes me to pick: the appearance of my skin = how I feel about myself. The more I move away from caring about the appearance of skin, good or bad, the less skin picking has control over my life.
I‘ve been struggling with this illness for eight years now. Every time I pick I tell myself I won’t do it again. I want to thank you for your work because your videos have really helped me see that I’m not alone and you helped me cope with all of this. One day, I hope we will all be able to make it.
So TRUE! I'm ALWAYS setting myself up for challenges with my picking, with my eating, with my weed smoking, exercise, cleaning. At 47, I'm so tired of listening to that stupid voice in my head that has been collecting silly thoughts since birth.
How the F does this even start? A decade ago, I was walking my neighbours dog everyday and I started sweating more and got a few bumps on my back shoulder and I started picking at them. That's how I remember it starting. I was going through a stressful time (divorce, starting a business) and it was calming me as I picked those bumps. Now I pick from the top of my head to my knees. Of course I had no idea it would EVER get this out of control. I'm so F'N sorry to EVERYBODY dealing with this. It feels TERRIBLE when I know that I am doing this to my own body and that I'm the only one who can stop it. EVERYDAY I say it will be the last day. I'm going to stop saying that because it hurts to let myself down on the daily.
Tbh sometimes I still tell myself that I’m gonna have a picking-free week. But after a few hours I’m already like: who am I kidding? 😂 I can’t even do a picking-free day and I know it won’t work anyway either. But I think there’s just always a little bit of hope that it will be different this time, even though I know that’s kind of stupid🙈
Madeleine Monteiro It’s not stupid it all lovey - it’s definitely a good thing to have hope and optimism! I think we can often that however when we’re feeling very ashamed and disappointed because it fuels the motivation to “make the change”. This time it’ll be different, this time I won’t do it. It’s not a negative thing to be realistic, and we can still put that optimism towards a more self-compassionate approach ☺️💗
I struggled with OCD since I remember existing. When I was little was the stem/repetitive movement related. At a young age it became about eating disorder just to be replaced by skin picking. I have been doing this for at least 15 years now. I've been to the dermatologist last week for a different reason and she spotted right away how much I have been picking my skin. The sad thing is that I know if I overcome this I'll replace it with something else 😢
Mine comes from stress. Growing up I was in very abusive household and i all ways ran to that. A year ago my skin was getting better drastically for months and for the first time I thought it was over. Then my first mid life crisis happened I mean the lowest you can think and I couldn’t control it. My skin has never looked worse. But i I truly want to build a new habit to replace it and work hard to get rid of the stress in my life whatever I have to do.
please start daily scalp, neck, face Massage. replace unwanted behaviour with healthy and healing practice. Early signs of immune system fatigue includes picking, anxiety, skin ailments, insomnia, etc.all signs of stress to the immune system.. We do not absorb all vitamins efficiently. Stress induced ailments and problems signals the immune system is challenged. Pemphigus Foliaceous is common, misunderstood, and not serious unless the immune system health is not improved and maintained. Please, take care of your overall well-being and the problem will be solved for good. Peace!
I saw soooo many videos and none of them was as helpful as yours. This is the first time when I feel truly understood. Finally it is not about skin care or "great tips" but it fucuses on the root of the problem. Thank you 🙏
So good to hear from you! And really pleased to know you're okay. When you went suddenly AWOL I was a bit worried and wanted to message you, but also didn't want to bug you if you were trying to have a social media break 😉
Wow i've literally been scratching at that one spot of my cheek for a week and while watching this video was the only time i was able to stop. I literally do it for hours on end, i can go months without doing it but lately i started again and i know all the arguments to stop, i don't want a scar and i can't film TH-cam videos because i don't use make-up and i have this red spot there, it feels "so stupid" but it's not, but understanding the nechanisms might actually work. The only way i know to not do it is occupying my hands
Lovely explanation! We should see our picking (or whatever else we're doing) as a signal/cue that maybe we need to do some self care. When I become aware of it, I can check my list of various self care activities (such as journaling, meditating, etc) and choose something that will nourish and nurture myself in that moment, rather than shaming myself or trying to directly "control" it. It is like an addiction and should be treated as such. I'm in 12 step programs and it wasn't until I watched this video that I realized I can use the tools of the program to help me with this. Thank you, Kim!
I began this during my marriage breakdown as a dissociative thing. I took antibiotics, got out of the situation and took up crocheting that used my hands. I also covered all my mirrors. It cleared up eventually once I was in a better place emotionally hit has just started again because my mum is dying of cancer. I need to stop now because my fave is such a mess!!’
Hey I just found this video of yours and wanted to thank you from the bottom of my heart. Having only ever had people stare and ask "what the hell happened to your legs?!" and worrying only about the beauty aspect of my skin picking, I just never thought about the importance of what you said. I think this is going to be really really helpful for me. So yeah, thank you again and I hope you have a wonderful day, because you surely made mine🥰
Wow, this is the most helpful video I have ever watched for skin picking:) thank you so much, I have been able to set realistic goals and meditation is a safe place for me now! I never thought I would have the confidence to post a comment on a video on TH-cam with the worry of being judged but I just wanted to say thank you and that this has literally changed my life! I'm taking things one step at a time:) thanks for the advice.
Thank you so much Sayge, for the support and for sharing your story. You have a wonderfully supportive community which understand and are here for you.. including me!
Thank you for responding. It's comforting to know that I'm not the only one dealing with these things! Anyways, I hope you keep doing what you're doing, for yourself and for others. It is very inspiring to hear your experience and to know there are other ways to cope with negative emotions! I wish you the very best with your channel and I hope your message will be spread!
Kim can you say to parents that it’s no good when they’re overwhelmed my mother gets extremely extremely overwhelmed and she’s like in horror including yesterday morning and to me it just takes the picking issue further etc. exactly she keeps having me focus on the aftermath and she believes I do every night for the damage still isn’t clear so I actually just recorded myself in bed for she doesn’t believe me I try to be easier on myself but there’s no way for my mom makes me feel like someone not worth living and she mentions the family is annoyed with me and I feel even worse she says oh I need some one to talk too and that’s the first thing she says she she Danielle carved up her face again and it it just ruins the entire day and that’s been half of my life and now she’s going for surgery and she expects me to help her for she says she helped me and now she believes I won’t be able to for she doesn’t even see me help myself so she says
My wife suffered from severe acne as a teen. Now, as an adult she obsessively picks at her face. When I try to talk to her about it, she claims she is digging out black specs or hardened areas to improve her face and believes that is working. She tells me she will stop when finished, but she's been doing it for years. She tells me she is being more gentle and targeted than a professional face-peel or other medical procedure. Is there anything I can say to get through to her?
This has been my life for 20 years! It’s interesting how I never thought that it could be a bad thing to stop picking as a challenge. It makes sense though because if you try to go cold-turkey with anything like on a diet, you almost always cave and then you feel like a failure and go off the deep end... It makes things worse because then when you just give up in the end. I still don’t know exactly how to go about getting better though. It n a different note, I scheduled a second rhinoplasty and cheek augmentation for the end of April but it is postponed until some time in the summer or fall. Do you think that my obsession with getting plastic surgery is related to my skin picking?
Hey Stephen!☺️ Thank you for watching first of all. Because each one of us are very different, it may take a little bit of time to figure out what methods are best for you to feel more comfortable within yourself and your relationship with dermatillomania. It can be daunting, frustrating and exhausting, but it will be extremely rewarding in the long run as you begin to really love who you are. I definitely think your love for plastic surgery is linked to your body focused repetitive behaviour and potentially, you may also have what is known as body dysmorphia (or body dysmorphic disorder). I say this as very many of those diagnosed with dermatillomania also show signs of this too or have been diagnosed with it. What you may find - if you don’t make a conscious decision to actively understand the root of the cause of these behaviours - is you’re not satisfied for long enough after your latest surgery and will look into what to have (and focus on) next. It’s really REALLY easy to do if those like us aren’t careful. I’d love to hear your thoughts.. 💭
Yes here’s the biggest issue I have I’ll do good for a few days then all of the sudden I start again why ? Why do I go back as it’s healing I’m afraid I’ll start to create scars on my face as I have on my right fore arm what can I do Kim to prevent setbacks from happening is being aware of my triggers the only way?
I feel really sorry about you. I don't know what level of skin picking you are, but with mine I really want to stop the most that I can and go back to have a clean face without makeup just like when I was a child. I hate picking on my skin because it makes me feel ugly when I look myself into the mirror. I feel like an abnormal human. But I think that I can improve it with time and psychological help.
Glad this is here even if it is old! ❤ Not enough people coming out talking about it still even though years ago there wasn’t even videos about it at all. I figured with everyone vloging and stuff now a days there would be someone talking about it more. You’re very right and I’m taking your advice because I too have done so many times and I always fall back into the depths all over again. Derm is such a huge vicious circle
Emily Rose Hey Emily Rose! Great question - I won’t explain fully if you’ve googled it already but it’s usually pretty noticeable within ourselves when our testosterone is lower and our oestrogen is higher. We tend to feel highly emotional, more brain fog, quite lethargic and prone to overthinking which can contribute to our skin picking urges 💗
Insanely accurate.
Hey! Thank you so very much for watching Anya☺️ I really appreciate it💗
The thing that helps me the most is meditating, and being present, aware. When I look in the mirror and I learned to be present and in the moment, I'm more able to catch myself trying to pick and stop in time. Also, looking at yourself in the mirror and telling yourself that your skin is not supposed to be perfect and really observing it from a detached point of view. I tell myself that when I look at others I don't study all their blemishes, so why do I do it to myself? No one scrutinizes me like I do and so no one pays attention to my imperfections. I should see myself how others see me.
I screenshot this as a daily reminder for me. I'm going to use this on my journey to freedom from this disorder.
You really hit the nail right on the head in this video. I realized after years of trying to control my skin picking that trying to motivate myself through the improved appearance of my skin was fueling the very belief that causes me to pick: the appearance of my skin = how I feel about myself. The more I move away from caring about the appearance of skin, good or bad, the less skin picking has control over my life.
thank you for the advice
Thank you for sharing this ✨
I‘ve been struggling with this illness for eight years now. Every time I pick I tell myself I won’t do it again. I want to thank you for your work because your videos have really helped me see that I’m not alone and you helped me cope with all of this. One day, I hope we will all be able to make it.
So TRUE! I'm ALWAYS setting myself up for challenges with my picking, with my eating, with my weed smoking, exercise, cleaning.
At 47, I'm so tired of listening to that stupid voice in my head that has been collecting silly thoughts since birth.
How the F does this even start? A decade ago, I was walking my neighbours dog everyday and I started sweating more and got a few bumps on my back shoulder and I started picking at them. That's how I remember it starting. I was going through a stressful time (divorce, starting a business) and it was calming me as I picked those bumps. Now I pick from the top of my head to my knees. Of course I had no idea it would EVER get this out of control.
I'm so F'N sorry to EVERYBODY dealing with this. It feels TERRIBLE when I know that I am doing this to my own body and that I'm the only one who can stop it. EVERYDAY I say it will be the last day. I'm going to stop saying that because it hurts to let myself down on the daily.
Hey internet friend, how has it been going since then?
@@nixamair4000 I cured it. Do you skin pick?
@@Godisfirst21 yes I am struggling with it at the moment, mostly on my face✨
@@Godisfirst21 congrats!!!
@@nixamair4000 I'm going to make a video of what I did to cure my picking.
I went pick free for about 2 weeks, then got stressed and picked my scalp raw.
This made me cry
Same
You’ve relaxed me and calmed my stress. Thank you so much. I wish you happiness ❤
Tbh sometimes I still tell myself that I’m gonna have a picking-free week. But after a few hours I’m already like: who am I kidding? 😂 I can’t even do a picking-free day and I know it won’t work anyway either. But I think there’s just always a little bit of hope that it will be different this time, even though I know that’s kind of stupid🙈
Madeleine Monteiro It’s not stupid it all lovey - it’s definitely a good thing to have hope and optimism! I think we can often that however when we’re feeling very ashamed and disappointed because it fuels the motivation to “make the change”. This time it’ll be different, this time I won’t do it. It’s not a negative thing to be realistic, and we can still put that optimism towards a more self-compassionate approach ☺️💗
I struggled with OCD since I remember existing. When I was little was the stem/repetitive movement related. At a young age it became about eating disorder just to be replaced by skin picking. I have been doing this for at least 15 years now. I've been to the dermatologist last week for a different reason and she spotted right away how much I have been picking my skin. The sad thing is that I know if I overcome this I'll replace it with something else 😢
Mine comes from stress. Growing up I was in very abusive household and i all ways ran to that. A year ago my skin was getting better drastically for months and for the first time I thought it was over. Then my first mid life crisis happened I mean the lowest you can think and I couldn’t control it. My skin has never looked worse. But i I truly want to build a new habit to replace it and work hard to get rid of the stress in my life whatever I have to do.
please start daily scalp, neck, face Massage. replace unwanted behaviour with healthy and healing practice. Early signs of immune system fatigue includes picking, anxiety, skin ailments, insomnia, etc.all signs of stress to the immune system.. We do not absorb all vitamins efficiently. Stress induced ailments and problems signals the immune system is challenged. Pemphigus Foliaceous is common, misunderstood, and not serious unless the immune system health is not improved and maintained. Please, take care of your overall well-being and the problem will be solved for good. Peace!
I saw soooo many videos and none of them was as helpful as yours. This is the first time when I feel truly understood. Finally it is not about skin care or "great tips" but it fucuses on the root of the problem. Thank you 🙏
So good to hear from you! And really pleased to know you're okay. When you went suddenly AWOL I was a bit worried and wanted to message you, but also didn't want to bug you if you were trying to have a social media break 😉
I am very grateful to you for raising this topic and sharing really useful information and your experience
I am embarrassed by my arms. Actually started on my thighs. So many scars. I wear long sleeves now.
same. my arms don't look that bad actually but it just bothers me to have them visible for me to pick at any time. It just feels too vulnerable
Wow i've literally been scratching at that one spot of my cheek for a week and while watching this video was the only time i was able to stop. I literally do it for hours on end, i can go months without doing it but lately i started again and i know all the arguments to stop, i don't want a scar and i can't film TH-cam videos because i don't use make-up and i have this red spot there, it feels "so stupid" but it's not, but understanding the nechanisms might actually work. The only way i know to not do it is occupying my hands
Lovely explanation! We should see our picking (or whatever else we're doing) as a signal/cue that maybe we need to do some self care. When I become aware of it, I can check my list of various self care activities (such as journaling, meditating, etc) and choose something that will nourish and nurture myself in that moment, rather than shaming myself or trying to directly "control" it. It is like an addiction and should be treated as such. I'm in 12 step programs and it wasn't until I watched this video that I realized I can use the tools of the program to help me with this. Thank you, Kim!
I began this during my marriage breakdown as a dissociative thing. I took antibiotics, got out of the situation and took up crocheting that used my hands. I also covered all my mirrors. It cleared up eventually once I was in a better place emotionally hit has just started again because my mum is dying of cancer. I need to stop now because my fave is such a mess!!’
Hey I just found this video of yours and wanted to thank you from the bottom of my heart. Having only ever had people stare and ask "what the hell happened to your legs?!" and worrying only about the beauty aspect of my skin picking, I just never thought about the importance of what you said. I think this is going to be really really helpful for me. So yeah, thank you again and I hope you have a wonderful day, because you surely made mine🥰
Wow, this is the most helpful video I have ever watched for skin picking:) thank you so much, I have been able to set realistic goals and meditation is a safe place for me now! I never thought I would have the confidence to post a comment on a video on TH-cam with the worry of being judged but I just wanted to say thank you and that this has literally changed my life! I'm taking things one step at a time:) thanks for the advice.
Thank you so much Sayge, for the support and for sharing your story. You have a wonderfully supportive community which understand and are here for you.. including me!
Thank you for responding. It's comforting to know that I'm not the only one dealing with these things! Anyways, I hope you keep doing what you're doing, for yourself and for others. It is very inspiring to hear your experience and to know there are other ways to cope with negative emotions! I wish you the very best with your channel and I hope your message will be spread!
Kim can you say to parents that it’s no good when they’re overwhelmed my mother gets extremely extremely overwhelmed and she’s like in horror including yesterday morning and to me it just takes the picking issue further etc. exactly she keeps having me focus on the aftermath and she believes I do every night for the damage still isn’t clear so I actually just recorded myself in bed for she doesn’t believe me I try to be easier on myself but there’s no way for my mom makes me feel like someone not worth living and she mentions the family is annoyed with me and I feel even worse she says oh I need some one to talk too and that’s the first thing she says she she Danielle carved up her face again and it it just ruins the entire day and that’s been half of my life and now she’s going for surgery and she expects me to help her for she says she helped me and now she believes I won’t be able to for she doesn’t even see me help myself so she says
This helped thanks
My wife suffered from severe acne as a teen. Now, as an adult she obsessively picks at her face. When I try to talk to her about it, she claims she is digging out black specs or hardened areas to improve her face and believes that is working. She tells me she will stop when finished, but she's been doing it for years. She tells me she is being more gentle and targeted than a professional face-peel or other medical procedure. Is there anything I can say to get through to her?
So right .It doesn't work 🥺
For me the answer has always been in RELEASE. No rules no schedules no promises .
Yess! Far less pressure 💛
This has been my life for 20 years! It’s interesting how I never thought that it could be a bad thing to stop picking as a challenge. It makes sense though because if you try to go cold-turkey with anything like on a diet, you almost always cave and then you feel like a failure and go off the deep end... It makes things worse because then when you just give up in the end.
I still don’t know exactly how to go about getting better though.
It n a different note, I scheduled a second rhinoplasty and cheek augmentation for the end of April but it is postponed until some time in the summer or fall. Do you think that my obsession with getting plastic surgery is related to my skin picking?
Hey Stephen!☺️ Thank you for watching first of all. Because each one of us are very different, it may take a little bit of time to figure out what methods are best for you to feel more comfortable within yourself and your relationship with dermatillomania. It can be daunting, frustrating and exhausting, but it will be extremely rewarding in the long run as you begin to really love who you are.
I definitely think your love for plastic surgery is linked to your body focused repetitive behaviour and potentially, you may also have what is known as body dysmorphia (or body dysmorphic disorder). I say this as very many of those diagnosed with dermatillomania also show signs of this too or have been diagnosed with it.
What you may find - if you don’t make a conscious decision to actively understand the root of the cause of these behaviours - is you’re not satisfied for long enough after your latest surgery and will look into what to have (and focus on) next. It’s really REALLY easy to do if those like us aren’t careful. I’d love to hear your thoughts.. 💭
I relate and understand what you're going through.
How did the surgery take effect? Have you cancelled it, nonetheless? I do not know what this is according to skin picking. ❓
geniusss thank you!!!!
I can't even make it a week, 6 days is my best streak, I havent even made it for four days in months
I found a cure for me. I don't pick anymore.
How?
Yes here’s the biggest issue I have I’ll do good for a few days then all of the sudden I start again why ? Why do I go back as it’s healing I’m afraid I’ll start to create scars on my face as I have on my right fore arm what can I do Kim to prevent setbacks from happening is being aware of my triggers the only way?
I feel really sorry about you. I don't know what level of skin picking you are, but with mine I really want to stop the most that I can and go back to have a clean face without makeup just like when I was a child. I hate picking on my skin because it makes me feel ugly when I look myself into the mirror. I feel like an abnormal human. But I think that I can improve it with time and psychological help.
I feel sorry that you're all such scam artists
I cried
Glad this is here even if it is old! ❤
Not enough people coming out talking about it still even though years ago there wasn’t even videos about it at all. I figured with everyone vloging and stuff now a days there would be someone talking about it more. You’re very right and I’m taking your advice because I too have done so many times and I always fall back into the depths all over again. Derm is such a huge vicious circle
curious why is boosting testosterone good? thanks for the video
nvm I googled but idk if I'm exactly low in that haha. exercise is goood tho
Emily Rose Hey Emily Rose! Great question - I won’t explain fully if you’ve googled it already but it’s usually pretty noticeable within ourselves when our testosterone is lower and our oestrogen is higher. We tend to feel highly emotional, more brain fog, quite lethargic and prone to overthinking which can contribute to our skin picking urges 💗
@@KIMONSKIN Stuffs to complicated for me but I do know exercise be good