I am the same age as this guy and I have almost 4 years clean now. The last thing I’m going to do is go back to the drug house to tell them all “it can be done”. I have my own apartment and a nice part of San Diego now and I avoid those people places and things. Hopefully this guy gets it before he gets older.
His father was a bully, he was/is a bully. You can't goof off on everyone in your life and drug and drink out month after month, year after year and bully everyone around you and then cry Poor Me. I've known people like this. They avoid responsibility at every turn. He never married Jameson's mother, and then he threatened her? What caused the 10 day break up? (I'll bet HE did). There's more to the story. At 50, is anything or anyone going to matter enough to him to get sober and finally take responsibility or is he just going to go out and "celebrate" once again?
I couldn't finish this. Chad reminds me so much of my addicted siblings. The saddest part was when it dawned on my one exhausting day with them was that even if they were 33 or 46 or 39 years old, they remained at the age when they started their addictions. I realized I was dealing with 12 or 14 year olds. The drugs and alcohol totally stunted their ability to actually emotionally mature. I was 24 and didn't feel like being their mother. It just made me incredibly angry. See, I had it worse than they did and I, I, I, choose to make good choices despite what was around me. I was despised, made fun of, called a loser, a nun, an egghead, and much worse by them so I had little sympathy that I matured and they didn't!
I am reading a lot of these comments stating that this man should be a father to Jameson even though he is not biologically his. No child needs a father who since age 17 has not maintained sobriety for longer than six months and is now 49. I am absolutely certain that last night was not Chad's first time waking up in a stairwell using his clothing to wipe his a**. This man will never be capable of making positive life decisions until he finds sobriety by any means necessary and should stay far away from children until (and if) he does.
When I listen to him, he sounds like an unstable person, vindictive, immature. It is better for the child to move away from him, it is sad but better for the child in the long run.
Who are we to say that someone can't get sober you definitely don't need to be here for your lack of empathy is sad . I've seen ppl who have done more than him and they are now sober. If you can't be kind just go somewhere else and get off your high horse. I'll always pray for all addicts and wish them the best
@@jeannetteburns1297Perhaps reading comprehension is not your strong suit. I clearly stated that someone who is actively using has no business raising anyone’s children. I have great empathy for those struggling with addiction and hope Chad can finally find sobriety and have the life he dreams of, however, my greatest empathy will always be with a child that did not ask to be born and raised in unstable households by a string of boyfriends, addicts and who knows what else. There are enough examples right here on SWU to illustrate where that most often leads.
My dad just passed away, and after he passed I had so many people that came to me saying how he was the dad that they needed at a hard time in their life. There are so many people that don't have dads, and if you can be that special father figure to Jameson, that's a special gift. Sending you love and hoping you get some peace in life Chad.
I loved hearing about your dad, my deepest condolences to you. I had an amazing dad also with whom I had a close, beautiful relationship with. I could completely relate w/your saying that after he passed, many ppl came 2 you 2 let you know how giving & selfless he was. I know that it's a million times more difficult to lose someone when they're a wonderful person, I'm so very sorry, my heart goes out to you, take care of yourself. And yes, Chad can be a dad like we both had to Jameson. I'm not in his position, but he needs to be there for that little boy, unlike his dad who wasn't there for him in the capacity that Chad needed. Jameson needs you in his life Chad, and loves you as much as you do him! Best wishes to you and him!
@binaryfairy4197 Thank you🙏 your words mean so much and my heart is with you as well 💞💗💓 I'm so glad you had a beautiful relationship with your dad. Experiencing unconditional love is truly life changing and wonderful. We are so lucky
My father was never in my life but I’ve had father figures that were just as important and made just as much of an impact. Without men like that, I’m not sure I would be clean today. Be there for him.
His mom was dead wrong. You can NOT love a child the same from a distance. Remember, his mom didn’t raise him with his father so how would she even have personal experience to say that to him? I suspect we didn’t get the truth here. We got a lot of surface excuses but no deep truths. This man needs therapy. CBT.
@@WillStultsSongs emdr worked for me as well. Until it didn’t. It’s great for some people but not others. Somatic experiencing has been completely life altering for me. I highly recommend.
I call bullshit. Had he not had the baby to blame for his failures he would have blamed it on something or someone else. No authenticity in his pain or tears.
I agree… looking for any issue to “sex drugs and rock and roll” . He even says he sabotages himself and can’t get a year clean… he’s having a hard time “getting it”, especially at his age.
Someone made a comment that people who get into drugs stop maturing at the age the serious drug use began, that is so true. Truth is this guy hasn’t hit bottom and if he doesn’t change soon the drugs and alcohol will take their toll. Wishing you the gift of sobriety.
I have a ton of thoughts, but I’m only going to say one. As hard as it was for you to lose a child after nine months, think of how hard it is for your mother to lose you after almost 50 years. As a mother, I’m telling you, your mom knows the score, so stop withholding yourself from her. You already said you’ll regret it, and you will. Don’t let your mom go to her grave thinking you didn’t care about her, because your absence says just that.
My son's "dad" isn't biologically his. They met each other when my son was just 1 year old. Even though our relationship didn't last, he never stopped being his "dad." My son is now 29 years old and this man still remains his dad. I respect this man so much! He stayed even though he didn't have to. That's true love. If you love this baby, you will stay his dad.
Forgive me for asking but I'm just curious how it works so please don't get offended (or get offended if you can't help it)... Does he have to pay child support? And that is by state right? What state are you?)
I’ve been in situations like that. My wife’s ex stepfather is so important to her and our children. He’s a great man. I know it’s cliche to say this but anyone can make a baby but being a parent or grandparent is a choice.
Chad you can get sober if you want to. Get into a 12 step program, get a good male sponsor and get honest. I can relate to you on the level of being a relapsing addict. You know you have to fight the disease or it will take everything from you. When you're ready go back to the program and put your heart and soul into it. You can still have the family you want if you don't wait too long. You can have so much more than the drugs can give you. You gotta be strong and do what it takes to get sober and get out of that spin cycle. We are the same age and I'm hoping you won't keep on the destructive path. I'd love to see you come back and tell us how good your sober life is. If you have a higher power pray for strength. You're still alive and there's still time to have the beautiful life God wants you to have. Sending prayers for strength and serenity 🙏 Sobriety Rocks❤
So, it was never really about Jamison - it was always about him & what this idea of a family was doing for him! IF the love was real - nothing else would have mattered! Not being idealistic, I get it would/could have been messy but point is not about that child it was about This child! Good luck young man.... I hope you can find self reflection & honesty....then you might have a chance.
I wish more women would do the same...to self-reflect, take accountability like this man did, to want to change....yeah, but that ain't ever happening with Western women...no wonder the marriage rate is at it's all time low....yet women on TikTok simply blame men.... shocking
Hopefully he watches his own interview and really listens to himself. I gotta tell yah everything he needs to know and hear he’s already said and knows. I’m gonna say this because he needs to hear it, grow up and stop lying to yourself and your mother. You’re are exactly like your father. I’m glad that you aren’t a parent because you aren’t ready to be a father.
@palmac.4451 I never said anything about that or spoke about one's moral obligations right or wrong because I've never been in that situation. I can't imagine finding out the child I thought was mine turned out not to be I just wonder if his biological dad knows
@@williamwrenn5977it does but if it was as easy as just stopping, as easy as just not doing drugs then you can be guaranteed some people would just stop. Sometimes no matter how badly one wants to stop they are not able to do so...
He’s looking for excuses to justify his addiction. Finding out the child isn’t his biologically is painful but it’s no excuse to turn to drugs. He suffers from addiction. He has to find the strength to go sober.
Not to detract from his pain but ive heard a lot worse that drove people into addiction. Leave the pity party and get into a program. You can have a better life if you really want it ❤
Sad. I wish he'd combined his sobriety with therapy. I see Chad as a victim of "bro" culture in recovery. Along with showing off your new car and job to the "guys in the sober house", you've got a 20 something year old girl with Daddy issues. Very common. Never lasts. Stop worrying about your muscles and hairline. Figure out who you are with a professional. A 50 year old man should not still be hung up on what happened in grade school, and glorifying his Mom.
You read all that into his story huh? Your little made up story reveals you, not him, your insecurities in regards to certain men and sexist stereotyping that plague your ill attempts at psychoanalysis. Leave it to the pros. Scary.
@@vaf6973 you're right, but it looks and sounds like he feel in love with the child so now that the damage is done, he could at least stay in the kids life.?.? Idk it's a tuff one, that's for sure!!!!
sooooo true!!! my late husband was the most amazing stepfather ever!!! He poured his heart and soul into her...and it shows. He was her rock when she went thru 2 years of chemo. She was with him in the hospital to give him comfort and kissed his eyes when he took his last breath. The bond was stronger than any question of blood. When people get hung up on the word 'mine', that mind set is about ownership...know what I mean? Sometimes when a 'parent' pushes for a dna test they are looking for a reason to justify leaving. Love...is a choice....just move forward in love. 😊
@@Gram72534 myeah, that relationship he gets to keep at any time if he feels like it. Just flush the non-mom like the human piece of garbage she is, imo. Cheers.
If your mom is "still in your corner," then she is in denial. I had a son who I believed and I kept "saving" - and it finally came to me I was messing him up by believing him. He became a whole person after that, at about age 30. He went to AA, for himself, and still goes to this day. He also learned not to lie. I am so so proud that I NOW can actually, honestly believe in him. She's not helping. And Chad is a narcissist who also somehow also feels he is a victim.
narcissism is right but you miss the entire point, narcissists create themselves. There is no point of blame, it's a line of dominos. He's a narcissist because his mother is, she "looks out" for him because his actions reflect on her.
@@craigslist6988 No, mother is not always the cause of narcissism. And, last I looked, we are allowed to disagree with each other. I did not miss any point....
@@marshamorrell2769 the mother doesn't have to be, she just is in this case if you listened to the story. Fine to disagree, I didn't say anything about whether you could or not. But no one in this story is good, no one can be labeled as the problem when they all are. Disagree with that if you want, don't see you pointing out where I'm wrong though.
I usually try not to feel judgemental about anything anyone discussed here, and this isn't exactly judgemental as much as it is feeling there is some kind of inauthenticity or denial going on here. I don't mean intentional inauthenticity, but a lack of awareness. I just think all the pain he's projecting is related to more than a paternity test, but became a good focus. There feels like a wounded narcissism, or even masochism, something I'm not sure he's aware of, but that a lot of therapy might help him unravel. There is almost a clinging to his pain or something. Our emotions can be so much more complex than we ourselves know. We can truly believe one thing about ourselves when many deeper truths are underlying the surface. I don't claim to know what those deeper truths are for him, but I would encourage him to see a good therapist, someone he likes and can trust, and then to be open to the different layers of his feelings emerging over time. I hope that in the meantime he can find a way to do what is least harmful for the child, who has no role in any falseness. If the least harmful way is to disengage until he can work things out and only be financially responsible, that may be better than being with the child while experiencing feelings of deep betrayal or resentment. Getting to truly know yourself and where your pain originates can be a long journey and hard sometimes but also rewarding at times and a relief. And it's often never finished. But I think if you have this much pain and just accept the surface level explanation, you can do things to repeat the pain over and over.
Your pain is real to me . Not the exact same path . Im 15 yrs your senior . Ive accepted Christ as my savior . Pain is just , for some . Born to have. Hug your momma ! Keep praying and praise Christ ! and show that little boy love your attention. Hes yours and you are definitely gifted with a great chance to make him all that you wanted to find . He really deserves a good n great day and someone to believe in! Gods grace my friend .
So a middle aged drug dealer doesn’t date women his age because he is admittedly chronically immature and then finds out she had sex with someone else while they were broken up. Chad reminds me of the guy who is new to AA meetings and dominates every conversation because his trauma and saga has to be shared ceaselessly. And he takes no responsibility for his situation. 9 months with a child is not proof of good parenting. I’m hoping the child actually has responsible loving adults in his life. 20 years of taking care of abused and neglected children made this guy feel all too familiar to me. He referred to the child as an “it” once it wasn’t “his”. I hear a lot of self pity and little actual reflection and growth.
pretty much, but the kid doesn't have a chance in hell of having good parents. The mother is a narcissist who will use the kid for pity paychecks and child support if she can sucker a guy in for long enough. He's an addict with some unknown issue that pulls him inevitably back to drugs, probably will stay that way. The child is the innocent loser here, messed up childhood he's doomed to have because of damaged parents. Another interview for the channel if it exists in fifteen years...
Oh shit and you know that woman knew the whole time it wasn’t his kid, but decided in an in a panic that he would be a better provisioner than the biological
Exhibit A on why you fix yourself for you...not for a relationship, or a kid, or a new car, or anything other than your own sanity....wish this guy the best he learned a valuable lesson the hard way.
Wow! This is the first time in SWU that I have the impression: he WANTS to be unhappy. The story could also have gone like this: "Biologically I wasn't able to have children. But now I have the chance to be a father! I love this little boy and he loves me. I will be the best father for him. I am blessed. Thank you, God!"
Come on. It's really not that simple. He's hurting. That has to be unbelievable painful. He does not want to be unhappy. His happiness was ripped away from him.
So uou have no ability to understand the shock, confusion, disbelief, anxiety and extreme hurt he feels as a result of being lured to believe he was the biological father ? Can you imagine going 8 months waiting for your child being born, the child you never thought you'd experience to have. Then the birth of this precious baby and you experience the most profound, pure love and happiness like nothing else you've ever felt in your whole life. It's a love like nothing else . You live in this cocoon of love, bliss and unbelievable happiness for nine months finally having the family you've dreamt of for 40 years. And suddenly you gwt words of the child not being yours but your partner says you're absolutely crazy for even asking her about the child not being yours. Of course it's yours! Like, what's wrong with you for even thinking the thoughts of me lying to you about you being the father? He takes the test and his whole existence is a lie! You seriously don't understand why he did what he did? You're for real telling me that yiu could just brushbawayvall the Lies, the hurt, the questioning your own insanity, the fact that your partner isn't all well in the head, and just go on like it's all fine?
@@RadRedhead222 Yes, of course I understand that. It's my general impression. I don't want to blame him. My point was: The end of this story could have been different. Im am sure that he has major psychological problems. I hope he will find professsional help and will be able to live a better life.
This middle aged momma's boy might consider just being "Uncle Chad" to the boy because in reality he doesn't need a drug addict father with no stability in his life. This would create lots of problems as well as being a terrible example for the young boy to emulate. May you find peace, maturity and sobriety in your life Chad. Time is marching on.😢
I’ve watched this several times, and I’m surprised at how my feelings have changed. At first I questioned some of his perceptions but had a lot of compassion for him. The more I hear him, the more I think he’s a raging narcissist. He loves to hear himself talk, he blames others for their indiscretions, but laughs about what a bully he was, about how they were a great match…he was selling drugs…haha…”that sounds funny but”…actually it sounds pathetic. Girls were “throwing themselves at him,” he was “the best” at this and that. He had a partner 20 years younger, either because he wanted power, or because women his age can read him like a cheap book. He has created all of his problems, rages at his misfortune, and willingly gave up the one thing he says he wanted because it triggered his shame and rage. I felt sorry for him the first few times, now I feel like he saved that child a lot of pain by removing himself from his life. His baby didn’t respond to him…”talking about beating a horse when it’s down.” So now the baby is a bit of a bad guy too. His partner left him in wreckage.” He may not be “the perfect saint.” Omg - how did I not see his rabid narcissism the first time. He may be mildly sociopathic or psychotic. He also thinks God is working through him. What a pill.
wow man, it's like this guy is walking down a dark tunnel and saw a light. it wasn't at the end of the tunnel, it was in the ceiling. he was able to climb out for a few months, then knocked back down to walk that tunnel looking for another light. sad.
There's no denying Chad's life to this point has been tragic. I also think there's no denying there's some ADHD in there peppered in with a little covert narcissim. My opinion, not claiming I can diagnose. At 49, and with all the rehab and sober living, Chad sure can talk the talk. Therapy and adhd meds might help him actually walk the walk. Like Mark said, anyone can change...it's never too late.
Guy thinks dating a girl 20 years younger is a good idea based on his dynamic. 100% narcy. There's people with bigger problems they don't bring on themselves as tragic as half his story may be.
Yeah, he's the Real narcissist because he won't put up with her BS, not his wife that already had a dude on speed dial, during the week they broke up. It isn't uncommon for women to do that. Who's to say she wasn't playing him the whole time?
@@aspartamekillsyaknow9019 time to see the forest through the trees. Whos to say yeah okay. Keep making excuses for him, his mommy's done that too his whole life and look where it got him!
I don't usually say negative, without knowing my facts... But he's 49 yrs old & is still talking about his grade 1 class?! Mommy's boy for sure AND. he, himself, loves his stepdad?? You seem to have held this event, life altering, as you, still are talking like a little boy. I understand your hurt, and wanting the truth is important ... However., you need to accept the good and bad in life. God never promised you a Rose Garden... Along with the Sunshine... There's going to be a little rain sometimes. You turned your back.. you did the same as your own father and used your hurt and bitterness, against that poor little boy 😲😢. Time to pull up your Big Boy Pants, instead of a toddler, teenage boy. Sorry, not Sorry... This isn't depression... I, I, I, I, I, YADA, YADA, YADA... WOW, enough already.
He's full of self-pity and continues to bank on what he was as a child to define him. A typical addict's mind. Emotional sobriety is MORE important than just eliminatiing the substance. Adversities in life will come everyday, the evil inner voice of addiction is just waiting for you to rationalize re-using only to compound the orgiinal problem. Recognizing your triggers is the work required to stay clean. Love the kid, lose the girl, your sobriety is the #1 priority. Everything else is not yours to control.
I don't think he'll get sober unless he stops being so self-obsessed. In the whole story, he never once stops to think about that kiddo and how the kiddo is doing, only how the loss affected *him*.
Maybe the mom should go back thru her rolodex of one night stands and attempt to find the biological father. Maybe get the actual father involved and attempt to give the kid a normal life. That kid isn’t this guys issue and from the sounds of it the mom and him didn’t make a good couple anyhow.
Ugh. Self-obsessed?! What a gross statement for someone that was hurt so bad. I'm sure you would say the same thing if it was a woman. Trash. I cringe for the men that have to interact with you. Self-obsessed is banging multiple dudes, supposively not even considering it could be multiple guys' baby, and doing nothing to make sure the real dad knew.
He could have Borderline, the way he says he is kind of "self-sabotaging" etc. And how He describes His choices and Feelings. I hope He can get Help and be the Father He wants to be for His little one. If He Loved that little one Like a son....He IS your son! All the best!!!
@@MeghanS9883oooh ok! Thank you. I wasn’t sure what borderline you meant because you can be borderline alotta things ya know?? like me, I’m borderline crazy off the meat racks and some times I’m just chill as a cucumber 🥒 😎
High blood pressure that you ignore? Would you like to have a stroke and then lay in a bed half paralyzed so then you can be even more depressed? Keep up the stimulants and you are going to get your wish. Get it together and stop feeling sorry for yourself. Call your mother before it’s too late. You are still young enough to have a good life so stop acting like a teenager and get the help you need. It won’t be easy, but you know you can do this. You still have time. Go!
Being a father doesn’t mean blood. It means love and responsibility. A real man would step up to the plate, get clean and only then can you get the family that you want and dream of. It’s never too late. You let the adult shit get in the way of the child. The white picket fence is attainable but you have to look at it from a different perspective. I know men who have raised children that blood wasn’t a part of it. That’s what real men do in my opinion. I’m sure others will attack me in the comments but I have my reasons for my opinion. Experience makes you passionate and I don’t apologize for my stance. He is a good man at the bottom of this. He just needs to work on himself to attain what he is searching for. EDIT: I feel like he has done the same thing to this little boy that he claimed that his father did to him. Am I the only one interpreting like this?
bravo!!! it looks like the majority of comments agree with you! I sure do 😊 I've never seen anyone on Mark's channel bring me to anger. ... on a few levels.
Though you are absolutely correct in that a man can love a child just as much as if it was his after a betrayal like that it would be very difficult to go back to the mother after that and like he explained if he is not with the mother of the baby then he predicted she would insist he pay child support (which would be fine and all) however despite paying child support for the child because he is not the biological father she could use the babu as a pawn, keep him from seeing him...she would end up with someone else and not letters man continue to see the child and who wants to deal with that?
Only a sucker would raise a child that is not his own. He was deceived and he rightful walked! It would be different if he actually adopted by his own will but in this case any man that continued to raise a child like this is a sucker pure and simple.
Why does he have to be the kid’s biological father to raise him and be his dad? So much unnecessary drama and bad advice from his mom. So much selfishness and immaturity. This dude reminds me of Will Ferrell in Step Brothers.
Love is Love. Do not deny your feelings. I raised two children. Not from my body. My mother is incapable of empathy. Blood does not matter. FU for taking that phone call. See the human, pick up the human. I don't understand who you are. By the way, once you accept a child in any capacity, they are yours...forever. They leave, marry, divorce, and come back. They call me Sherry. It's taken me almost 55 years to understand that to them that means Mom. Stop crying.
stfu trying to guilt him, the woman tried to run a scam on him. That kid won't have a father no matter how much anyone tries, he's a ticket to child support for a narcissist mother and nothing more until he's 18. The legal system has to be fixed to stop allowing that scam. Go sit in on a family civil court for a day, 90% cases of women like her who would be just as content to see fathers water boarded if it meant they get a paycheck. Normal people don't lie about somethlng as serious as who is the father, and they definitely don't turn on a dime when caught into a second tactic of using the existing attachment to apply guilt like a knife to the gut. This guy's mom obviously had seen this before and carefully talked him out of getting scammed. Normal people tell the truth and try to make it work. All she did was the math - the dad "pyro" was either a broke loser or someone who would never settle down, and this guy wanted a family, was recovering, making good money. He was just the better mark. I predicted before I even got to the end of the interview she went after him for child support. I bet you a hundred she is simultaneously suing the biological father also. Your situation was different snd you should just be extra thankful you were lucky enough to not even be aware this is a thing.
Life threw Chad a lifeline, an amazing chance to turn around his life with the birth of Jameison. He loved that baby like no other, was a great dad and started working hard to support his son. He sabotaged it all by taking a paternity test, his name was on the birth certificate and everyone including himself was sure Jameison was his son. All a paternity test tells you is who was the sperm donor, not who is the father. Chad knew from personal experience how a sperm donor doesn't always make a man a good dad. Chad said his girlfriend didn't trust him to tell him the truth. But Chad didn't trust her either, otherwise why take a paternity test. Alternative story would have been set aside his ego, love that baby with his whole heart, marry Jameison's mother, settle down with his little family and be the best Chad he could be. He walked away from Jameison like his bio dad walked away from him. What Chad doesn't know is that at around 8-12 months of age, infants go through a fear of strangers period. Children are very sensitive to changes in their loved ones. After 3 weeks away, maybe Chad could have taken a little time to reconnect with Jameison. Sad.
except the mother was using the kid as a meal ticket. He wouldn't be allowed to be the father anyway. You obviously didn't listen, or you're a sister narc trying to help yourselves out. How many guys do you collect child support from?
Bud just poured his heart out . Respect sir . Addiction always tells the perfect lie to our selves to destroy overcoming it. Don’t fall for the lie , you’re a strong person ❤
Biology does not make or unmake a father. Showing up consistently and loving a child matters more. I don’t blame him for dumping Lynette, but a big part of the problem was that she was 20 years younger. Bad decision. I read recently that alcoholics and addicts feel more sorry for themselves than most people. As a drinker, I think it’s true.
Yes, it absolutely does that’s your resources. That’s your legacy as a man that woman knew the whole time she was living a lie taking advantage of a guy because he was a better provisioner than the biological she could’ve told him at any point in time she is a horrible person. I would hate to have that woman as a mother of my child to begin with. I would not be part of any of that with her.
Non-biologic dads, moms, aunts, uncles, and others love children of all ages, and various circumstances, as if they were their own. So, why does Chad suddenly have a change of heart about this baby boy? On the flip side, biological parents treat their own children terribly. I am a bit confused as to why Chad feels this child is no longer his, just because the sperm did not drop from his penis. I could not make it through the video - did he go back and do a second test on him, the baby and the mother? Lab mistakes can and do happen.
My buddy raised his son and learned that the kid wasn't his. The boy just turned 16 and had come to California for a visit. It was the boy's biological father who reemerged and pressed the issue. The other man asked for a paternity test. Sure enough, the son wasn't my friend's. His ex had an affair (beware of women with a high body count) and was impregnated. She made my friend believe that he was the father. My friend didn't care, it was his son and continued to support and love this kid like his own.
Female, with a high body count and no kids here. What a stupid thing to warn for a high body count. Getting pregnant has nothing to do with a body count. When I was around 25 statistically too many women around me were getting pregnant by their boyfriends 'accidentally'. I would be afraid of women wanting babies, not women wanting sex..
Also stop being a Victim and get your Shit Together!!!! JAMESON is who he is and needs u! AND stop focusing on who u don't want to be and stop the Street Drugs! TRUST ME. I am so completely versed in this shit! And well please life isn't all about the DNA etc.. i had a Step father from hell and the only parents i had were my Grandparents that i was forced to leave for 8 years...Get your shit together Chad!!!! And Cats are better than Dogs..lol
The kid situation is just a huge story distraction from the real issue he doesn’t have any responsibility or sobriety. He knows what he needs he sits through the sober living and listens but goes right back to being selfish. Not changing behaviors
This interview is another one that BROKE me 😢😢😢 he deserves to be a dad/ grandfather. I really think it could be the makings of this man. He needs to be needed❤ wishing you the best Chad
He strikes me as a whiny, self-absorbed boor. I cannot imagine why he thinks his "poor me...I don't understand why life is not perfect for me because I'm SUCH A GOOD GUY" b.s. is of interest to real people.
This guy kinda stands out as a sociopath or megalomaniac if you ask me. Yeah theres tragedy in his life and Im not saying its brought on by his own will but the guy goes back and forth with blame then it always goes back to something about him on another topic like his widows peak. Sounds like he doesn't know what to blame anything on like part of him is trying to admit something but ego wont allow it.
Wonder how many times he says "I me or my"in these 42 mins, I'm out after 10 mins bc I wasted fifteen years with a narc and can't listen to their self serving bs
You are exactly wrong that woman is a sociopath megalomaniac. Do you know good and well she knew the whole time it wasn’t his kid, but knew he would be a better provisioner so she went along with the lie after betraying him that is like the ultimate to commit paternity fraud.
In my opinion, it doesn't matter that he's not yours, he needs a dad and a dad is more than just a sperm donor. Please man up and be his dad, Jamison needs you.
Chad, please know you ARE worth everything YOU deserve. There is only ONE very special you. You are a handsome man with a beautiful heart inside and out. A kindness that runs deep through the rivers of your soul. You have integrity and morals. We are all born with positive attributes and everything to succeed. It's the way of others that introduce the wrongs and hurts that set the paths in life and then to be left with overcoming the challenges to correct and change for the right it's that gut intuition. I feel your situation being in the deep valleys of life but look up and overcome that mountain before you. For you will be stronger and oh so fulfilled with the glorious view of YOUR Horizon. To conquer all that has come against you and truly FEEL from within all that you accomplish. There lays a full life ahead of you. You've DONE it already and I KNOW you will again. Love and regard yourself the way your Mother and your loved ones do. Don't worry about child support. Your paternity proves it all. Wonderful things are coming for you. Embrace the good and best. Forget about the rest. So many believe in you and so do I. Love and Prayers from Iowa!
Man I love this guy. Hopefully the outpouring of love he needs will shine through in this comment section enough for this man to realize that yes, he is worth it.
He is afraid of child support that’s what he’s a fair weather father as long as the bills are paid he’s daddy but oops when he has to pay then it’s see ya kid Sure I could feel sorry for him but he made the choice to play the victim and go about slobbering and groaning about how bad his life has been and is Oh woe is me - boo hoo SMH
because the mother wouldn't allow him to be the father anyway. Classic narcissistic woman scam to sleep around to get pregnant to anchor a guy who they can collect a paycheck from. Even when her plan went off the rails she is still spending thousands to tens of thousands on a lawyer to establish child support. You think that's normal behavior? Her mistake was thinking he would stay clean and make good money, now she's probably crying and blaming him for her problems to any gullible guy who will listen in hopes she'll find a white knight sucker. Narcissists aren't always the brightest.
.....soooooo many youth dabbling in drugs and the "streets" need to hear this testimony, it just might deter their worst mistake. Some set-backs cost you years of life that you can NEVER get back. PEACE Brother Chad, God bless your steps with Grace, Mercy, Wisdom, and Favor. Brother Mark, God bless and STRENGTHEN you.
Chad, you're there to take that leap and start down the road of recovery. You're standing on that edge but you're doubting yourself. Reach out brother and just ask for help. It's there. You can 100% hit that road to recovery running. Take that leap of faith Chad.
Dude... move on. And for God's sake stop whining about it. You love the kid that much? Go be his Dad. I seriously doubt the other guy will ever get in your way
STOP using Jameson as an excuse for your poor behaviour. People have been through far worse and were able to pull themselves out of addiction. Grow some and push forward. Take some responsibility for your actions 🙄
This is so sad. This man is just devastated but he is that child's father. Even though they're not linked by DNA he's still that child's father. That little boy loves him and sees him as his father.
Sometimes life knocks you down . You can feel and cry and other shit but eventually you have to grow and learn from it and get up get out of the drugs and keep moving. Sometimes ppl just make excuses to keep doing that bs , you gotta be strong and take control over those wants n needs.
Hard to see poeple struggle so much. I know we all have issues but some just stay wrapped up in them. I wish you the best man and i hope you figure it out and become what you want to be in life. Best of luck brother!!!
When I listen to him, he sounds like an unstable person, vindictive, immature. It is better for the child to move away from him, it is sad but better for the child in the long run. If he had fallen in love with his son, he would never have taken that step. I mean paternity testing, I think he secretly wanted it, to get rid of everything. Fathers don't act like him.
Did you miss the part where after he found out he booked it the hell outta the kids life, went back to drugs and lives homeless on the streets for the last 4yrs. Perhaps editing your comment from "you are a wonderful father", to "You were a wonderful father" or "you had the potential to become a wonderful father and fucked up your chance"....theyd be more accurate. Eta: child was born in 2017, it's 2024. Jamieson is 7yrs old now and hasn't a clue who Chad is I'm willing to bet.
@@julybutterfly deceiving a man into raising another man’s kid is severe blow on a biological level. It’s not something you can dismiss and go about your merry way.
@@colettithekid that may be (the blow to ego and the reality) however Chad still had a chance to continue to parent the child he had been parenting for 9 months. He had the CHOICE to forgive and remain a parent in the childs life. No one would expect he stay in a romantic relationship with the mother, however there was forgiveness choice there too. Remember, at the time the mother was only 24, the human brain is only fully developed by 25. Chad was 44 at the time and a full fledged adult who reacted like a child with zero maturity. Thems is just excuses he tells himself. Infantile and narcissistic. There's zero excuses here. Cooling off period for a chance to think with logic brain and not emotion brain warranted of course, but Chad 7 years later is still not thinking with logic brain, and likely never will unless he gets into recovery of some sort.
It's NEVER to late to get help. You seem like a nice guy and your worth it! Jameson will know the truth some day. I don't think he is gone out of your life. There are lot's of good people out there. We can't pick our parents. I had an uncle who I adored. I had an Aunt different side of the family, she was my confidant and helped me so much. Good Luck.
Sometimes, having answers will ruin what you love. Sometimes, it will ruin you. Careful what door you knock on ppl. If you are happy, in the words of John Lennon, “let it be” Moved a lot, abandoned by dad, are not reasons to continue using when you know that using is THE REASON your life is s**t If you want sobriety, you’ll find a way to be sober. Gotta want it.
Broke up for a week and a half...broke up for a year and a half...odd how he goes back and forth on that detail. And how does he know who the real father is? "Pyro" didn't take a paternity test, I assume. Strange reasoning for taking a paternity test in the first place. He made a lot of assumptions about what would happen in the future if he stayed and/or if he left. A PhD in "Family Orientation"? If so, you'd think he could have handled the situation with a lot more depth and perseverance...except he was in deep addiction for decades. Did the mother use? Maybe there was a good reason for the break up. She might not have lied; she might have genuinely believed Chad was the father. Another detail: a non biological father is not liable to pay for child support. There are a lot of paths Chad could have taken to remain in the child's life; he chose to leave. This story is a mess.
I'm usually a bit more sympathetic but this story hit me hard. Did the (Real) Dad that groomed him to be a calculating manipulative Ice cream money thief Ice cream big shot Solar plexus puncher Firecracker of a bully ever take a paternity test? His wording was unsettling to me because he lacked a measurement for what he lost because of his nobody's gonna do me dirty mentality. I think he may have let himself off the hook at every snag and he states he is an opportunist. She was 20 years his junior. He has bad behavior and a dedicated history of poor performance. He said himself he gets triggered by people coming in to his life. A chick 20 years his senior meets him when he has a trans am and he waits tables at a swanky place. They have a tumultuous coupling followed by a fight in which they break up and she immediately upon reconciliation begins to flower and full out physically. Did he ride her about paternity during that 9months? He doesn't mention loving her once. The baby is born and he says the boy "lights up like no other" when he comes around? Given time would he shower with his son like his dad did? Would he teach him about the solar plexus. He needs a story of victory over pulling the scales from his eyes. He sees nothing correctly. Unfortunately. Like a domino effect. I've never seen it so clearly as here. But then I am just learning to look.
@@craigslist6988 You're the one who needs to chill out. From the number and type of comments you've made about this video and other people's reactions to it, you seem to have an agenda. As for me, a "child support check" doesn't figure in to anything about my life.
Regardless of what others feel about this guy we all have feelings and everyone’s breaking point is different. I feel bad that he got strung along, he thought the boy was here and he was invested in being a dad and I think he was happy and looking forward to being a father. None of us have a crystal ball to look back in time or forward. His heart was broken.
![⭐ฮิตในTikTok!! ( หมูเด้ง MooDeng ) Ver. แดนซ์โจ๊ะๆ ReMix BY [ ดีเจกิต รีมิกซ์ ]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/3krsyfWUeHU/mqdefault.jpg)
I am the same age as this guy and I have almost 4 years clean now. The last thing I’m going to do is go back to the drug house to tell them all “it can be done”. I have my own apartment and a nice part of San Diego now and I avoid those people places and things. Hopefully this guy gets it before he gets older.
His father was a bully, he was/is a bully. You can't goof off on everyone in your life and drug and drink out month after month, year after year and bully everyone around you and then cry Poor Me. I've known people like this. They avoid responsibility at every turn. He never married Jameson's mother, and then he threatened her? What caused the 10 day break up? (I'll bet HE did). There's more to the story. At 50, is anything or anyone going to matter enough to him to get sober and finally take responsibility or is he just going to go out and "celebrate" once again?
Beautiful. So happy for you .
Yes… the whole reason addiction is hard is Ego.. don’t go celebrating in front of crackheads that miss you & tempt you🫣
@@yoginikaltri333 Right
I am so happy for you.ive been through this with my son! Please stay clean and healthy!!!
I couldn't finish this. Chad reminds me so much of my addicted siblings. The saddest part was when it dawned on my one exhausting day with them was that even if they were 33 or 46 or 39 years old, they remained at the age when they started their addictions. I realized I was dealing with 12 or 14 year olds. The drugs and alcohol totally stunted their ability to actually emotionally mature. I was 24 and didn't feel like being their mother. It just made me incredibly angry. See, I had it worse than they did and I, I, I, choose to make good choices despite what was around me. I was despised, made fun of, called a loser, a nun, an egghead, and much worse by them so I had little sympathy that I matured and they didn't!
I applaud you're strength. that could not have been easy. takes alot of courage to reject systematic dysfunction
Mom? Enabler?
You did it to yourself. You could have been a dad for past 4 years.
I am reading a lot of these comments stating that this man should be a father to Jameson even though he is not biologically his. No child needs a father who since age 17 has not maintained sobriety for longer than six months and is now 49. I am absolutely certain that last night was not Chad's first time waking up in a stairwell using his clothing to wipe his a**. This man will never be capable of making positive life decisions until he finds sobriety by any means necessary and should stay far away from children until (and if) he does.
it's just the army of narcissist child support vampires, they're furious to hear one got away alive.
It's sad, but I think you are right.
When I listen to him, he sounds like an unstable person, vindictive, immature. It is better for the child to move away from him, it is sad but better for the child in the long run.
Who are we to say that someone can't get sober you definitely don't need to be here for your lack of empathy is sad . I've seen ppl who have done more than him and they are now sober. If you can't be kind just go somewhere else and get off your high horse. I'll always pray for all addicts and wish them the best
@@jeannetteburns1297Perhaps reading comprehension is not your strong suit. I clearly stated that someone who is actively using has no business raising anyone’s children. I have great empathy for those struggling with addiction and hope Chad can finally find sobriety and have the life he dreams of, however, my greatest empathy will always be with a child that did not ask to be born and raised in unstable households by a string of boyfriends, addicts and who knows what else. There are enough examples right here on SWU to illustrate where that most often leads.
My dad just passed away, and after he passed I had so many people that came to me saying how he was the dad that they needed at a hard time in their life. There are so many people that don't have dads, and if you can be that special father figure to Jameson, that's a special gift. Sending you love and hoping you get some peace in life Chad.
I loved hearing about your dad, my deepest condolences to you. I had an amazing dad also with whom I had a close, beautiful relationship with. I could completely relate w/your saying that after he passed, many ppl came 2 you 2 let you know how giving & selfless he was. I know that it's a million times more difficult to lose someone when they're a wonderful person, I'm so very sorry, my heart goes out to you, take care of yourself.
And yes, Chad can be a dad like we both had to Jameson. I'm not in his position, but he needs to be there for that little boy, unlike his dad who wasn't there for him in the capacity that Chad needed. Jameson needs you in his life Chad, and loves you as much as you do him! Best wishes to you and him!
@binaryfairy4197 Thank you🙏 your words mean so much and my heart is with you as well 💞💗💓 I'm so glad you had a beautiful relationship with your dad. Experiencing unconditional love is truly life changing and wonderful. We are so lucky
Everyone needs love
He doesn’t appear to take responsibility for his actions.
My father was never in my life but I’ve had father figures that were just as important and made just as much of an impact. Without men like that, I’m not sure I would be clean today. Be there for him.
🫶
His mom was dead wrong. You can NOT love a child the same from a distance.
Remember, his mom didn’t raise him with his father so how would she even have personal experience to say that to him?
I suspect we didn’t get the truth here. We got a lot of surface excuses but no deep truths.
This man needs therapy. CBT.
1000 percent! A lot of half-truths/untruths. Chad blames the world and can take no responsibility for himself.
Self-sabotage is a sign of nervous system dysregulation. As is addiction. Address the root cause and solve most, if not all, of your problems.
Seconded and I recommend EMDR for anyone going through the same. Changed my life.
Well said!
@@WillStultsSongs emdr worked for me as well. Until it didn’t. It’s great for some people but not others. Somatic experiencing has been completely life altering for me. I highly recommend.
I call bullshit. Had he not had the baby to blame for his failures he would have blamed it on something or someone else. No authenticity in his pain or tears.
I agree… looking for any issue to “sex drugs and rock and roll” . He even says he sabotages himself and can’t get a year clean… he’s having a hard time “getting it”, especially at his age.
Yeah. He seems like a bullshitter and dang cry baby.
Someone made a comment that people who get into drugs stop maturing at the age the serious drug use began, that is so true. Truth is this guy hasn’t hit bottom and if he doesn’t change soon the drugs and alcohol will take their toll. Wishing you the gift of sobriety.
I have a ton of thoughts, but I’m only going to say one. As hard as it was for you to lose a child after nine months, think of how hard it is for your mother to lose you after almost 50 years. As a mother, I’m telling you, your mom knows the score, so stop withholding yourself from her. You already said you’ll regret it, and you will. Don’t let your mom go to her grave thinking you didn’t care about her, because your absence says just that.
My son's "dad" isn't biologically his. They met each other when my son was just 1 year old. Even though our relationship didn't last, he never stopped being his "dad." My son is now 29 years old and this man still remains his dad. I respect this man so much! He stayed even though he didn't have to. That's true love. If you love this baby, you will stay his dad.
Love you, Angel!
Indeed...it takes a real man to raise a child that's not his own...all this could've prevented had you not spread your legs to Chad, Tyrone or Miguel
Forgive me for asking but I'm just curious how it works so please don't get offended (or get offended if you can't help it)... Does he have to pay child support? And that is by state right? What state are you?)
I’ve been in situations like that. My wife’s ex stepfather is so important to her and our children. He’s a great man. I know it’s cliche to say this but anyone can make a baby but being a parent or grandparent is a choice.
Did you ever adopt a child that wasn't yours and taken care of that child financially/emotionally for life?
Chad you can get sober if you want to. Get into a 12 step program, get a good male sponsor and get honest. I can relate to you on the level of being a relapsing addict. You know you have to fight the disease or it will take everything from you. When you're ready go back to the program and put your heart and soul into it. You can still have the family you want if you don't wait too long. You can have so much more than the drugs can give you. You gotta be strong and do what it takes to get sober and get out of that spin cycle. We are the same age and I'm hoping you won't keep on the destructive path. I'd love to see you come back and tell us how good your sober life is. If you have a higher power pray for strength. You're still alive and there's still time to have the beautiful life God wants you to have. Sending prayers for strength and serenity 🙏 Sobriety Rocks❤
❤
Through aa, God can change your life ❤❤
Starfire...you are lovely.
those swollen hands are a sign of somebody in deep. he needs to quit today.
@@Unfluencer their hands are always a rell tale sign
So, it was never really about Jamison - it was always about him & what this idea of a family was doing for him! IF the love was real - nothing else would have mattered! Not being idealistic, I get it would/could have been messy but point is not about that child it was about This child! Good luck young man.... I hope you can find self reflection & honesty....then you might have a chance.
Biological drive of a man is to create from his own DNA not be a pussywhipped caretaker for another man's offspring.
I wish more women would do the same...to self-reflect, take accountability like this man did, to want to change....yeah, but that ain't ever happening with Western women...no wonder the marriage rate is at it's all time low....yet women on TikTok simply blame men.... shocking
Uh because it's the son of the guy she cheated on him with that she lied to him about? You can't be serious
bottom of the dumpster take.
Hopefully he watches his own interview and really listens to himself. I gotta tell yah everything he needs to know and hear he’s already said and knows. I’m gonna say this because he needs to hear it, grow up and stop lying to yourself and your mother. You’re are exactly like your father. I’m glad that you aren’t a parent because you aren’t ready to be a father.
My name is also Chad and this guy seems like a great person. I hope you can get better man, you're worth it. And I'm so sorry about your son 😢
@GodGod-nq3bl do you mean c.h.u.d.?
I think a "great person" would have chosen to be that baby's father regardless if it's biologically his or not.
@@grafikj1uj1tsu This is a crazy statement. A good mother wouldn't sleep around and risk her child not having a father that sticks around.
Being lied to for so long hurts more then the act itself I hope this man finds peace
@@palmac.4451 he's human he is allowed to struggle.
@palmac.4451 I never said anything about that or spoke about one's moral obligations right or wrong because I've never been in that situation. I can't imagine finding out the child I thought was mine turned out not to be I just wonder if his biological dad knows
@palmac.4451 agreed substance abuse always has more victims then just the users
@@williamwrenn5977it does but if it was as easy as just stopping, as easy as just not doing drugs then you can be guaranteed some people would just stop. Sometimes no matter how badly one wants to stop they are not able to do so...
@@palmac.4451 The mother of Jameson had no other men to choose from?? Rgr
He’s looking for excuses to justify his addiction. Finding out the child isn’t his biologically is painful but it’s no excuse to turn to drugs. He suffers from addiction. He has to find the strength to go sober.
Not to detract from his pain but ive heard a lot worse that drove people into addiction. Leave the pity party and get into a program. You can have a better life if you really want it ❤
He is super immature. Emotional sobriety is elusive for many addicts and requires a lot of work. I hope he gets on it.
Well said
20 years younger than him, and he thought it would work out. Wth. Some men are so gullible.
Sad. I wish he'd combined his sobriety with therapy. I see Chad as a victim of "bro" culture in recovery. Along with showing off your new car and job to the "guys in the sober house", you've got a 20 something year old girl with Daddy issues. Very common. Never lasts. Stop worrying about your muscles and hairline. Figure out who you are with a professional. A 50 year old man should not still be hung up on what happened in grade school, and glorifying his Mom.
You read all that into his story huh? Your little made up story reveals you, not him, your insecurities in regards to certain men and sexist stereotyping that plague your ill attempts at psychoanalysis. Leave it to the pros. Scary.
@@neonnights16 I've read your other comments. You're sexist. And probably an incel.
I know it would absolutely hurt, but you don't have to be the biological to raise and love someone!!!
Sure you dont need to be the biological father, but i wouldnt raise the kid of the person who betrayed me
@@vaf6973 you're right, but it looks and sounds like he feel in love with the child so now that the damage is done, he could at least stay in the kids life.?.? Idk it's a tuff one, that's for sure!!!!
sooooo true!!! my late husband was the most amazing stepfather ever!!! He poured his heart and soul into her...and it shows. He was her rock when she went thru 2 years of chemo. She was with him in the hospital to give him comfort and kissed his eyes when he took his last breath. The bond was stronger than any question of blood. When people get hung up on the word 'mine', that mind set is about ownership...know what I mean? Sometimes when a 'parent' pushes for a dna test they are looking for a reason to justify leaving. Love...is a choice....just move forward in love. 😊
@@Gram72534 myeah, that relationship he gets to keep at any time if he feels like it. Just flush the non-mom like the human piece of garbage she is, imo. Cheers.
Voice of reason here: guys, always get a paternity test. If it’s not yours, leave immediately.
If your mom is "still in your corner," then she is in denial. I had a son who I believed and I kept "saving" - and it finally came to me I was messing him up by believing him. He became a whole person after that, at about age 30. He went to AA, for himself, and still goes to this day. He also learned not to lie. I am so so proud that I NOW can actually, honestly believe in him.
She's not helping. And Chad is a narcissist who also somehow also feels he is a victim.
narcissism is right but you miss the entire point, narcissists create themselves. There is no point of blame, it's a line of dominos.
He's a narcissist because his mother is, she "looks out" for him because his actions reflect on her.
@@craigslist6988 No, mother is not always the cause of narcissism. And, last I looked, we are allowed to disagree with each other. I did not miss any point....
@@marshamorrell2769 the mother doesn't have to be, she just is in this case if you listened to the story. Fine to disagree, I didn't say anything about whether you could or not. But no one in this story is good, no one can be labeled as the problem when they all are. Disagree with that if you want, don't see you pointing out where I'm wrong though.
I've watched a lot of your videos. This one is one of the heaviest...IMO. Thank you and I wish Chad happiness and health in the future.
To the speaker, you can't expect someone 20 years your junior to match your level of maturity.
I usually try not to feel judgemental about anything anyone discussed here, and this isn't exactly judgemental as much as it is feeling there is some kind of inauthenticity or denial going on here. I don't mean intentional inauthenticity, but a lack of awareness. I just think all the pain he's projecting is related to more than a paternity test, but became a good focus. There feels like a wounded narcissism, or even masochism, something I'm not sure he's aware of, but that a lot of therapy might help him unravel. There is almost a clinging to his pain or something. Our emotions can be so much more complex than we ourselves know. We can truly believe one thing about ourselves when many deeper truths are underlying the surface. I don't claim to know what those deeper truths are for him, but I would encourage him to see a good therapist, someone he likes and can trust, and then to be open to the different layers of his feelings emerging over time. I hope that in the meantime he can find a way to do what is least harmful for the child, who has no role in any falseness. If the least harmful way is to disengage until he can work things out and only be financially responsible, that may be better than being with the child while experiencing feelings of deep betrayal or resentment. Getting to truly know yourself and where your pain originates can be a long journey and hard sometimes but also rewarding at times and a relief. And it's often never finished. But I think if you have this much pain and just accept the surface level explanation, you can do things to repeat the pain over and over.
Great post! I wholeheartedly agree 👍🏻
Agree!
Exactly!!!
Your pain is real to me .
Not the exact same path . Im 15 yrs your senior .
Ive accepted Christ as my savior .
Pain is just , for some . Born to have.
Hug your momma !
Keep praying and praise Christ ! and show that little boy love your attention.
Hes yours and you are definitely gifted with a great chance to make him all that you wanted to find .
He really deserves a good n great day and someone to believe in!
Gods grace my friend .
Amen
So a middle aged drug dealer doesn’t date women his age because he is admittedly chronically immature and then finds out she had sex with someone else while they were broken up. Chad reminds me of the guy who is new to AA meetings and dominates every conversation because his trauma and saga has to be shared ceaselessly. And he takes no responsibility for his situation. 9 months with a child is not proof of good parenting. I’m hoping the child actually has responsible loving adults in his life. 20 years of taking care of abused and neglected children made this guy feel all too familiar to me. He referred to the child as an “it” once it wasn’t “his”. I hear a lot of self pity and little actual reflection and growth.
half of it sounds like a lie.
pretty much, but the kid doesn't have a chance in hell of having good parents. The mother is a narcissist who will use the kid for pity paychecks and child support if she can sucker a guy in for long enough.
He's an addict with some unknown issue that pulls him inevitably back to drugs, probably will stay that way.
The child is the innocent loser here, messed up childhood he's doomed to have because of damaged parents. Another interview for the channel if it exists in fifteen years...
Very well articulated. I feel the same way.
My favorite line of the interview is… I tried to hang in there, for a week.
You chose someone 20 years younger who was clearly immature and likely covered in red flags. You are very naive. I feel so sorry for the kid.
👍
I know, right? 20 years younger...crazy.
I'm 42, and there's NO WAY I'd date someone in their 20s...NO...WAY...
@@wesleyAlan9179agreed
Oh shit and you know that woman knew the whole time it wasn’t his kid, but decided in an in a panic that he would be a better provisioner than the biological
@@treehouse8501
You're probably right, who knows...but yeah,I'd guess that too.
According to Chad, everything is someone else’s fault
I was waiting for someone to say that! 100% victim mentality
Exhibit A on why you fix yourself for you...not for a relationship, or a kid, or a new car, or anything other than your own sanity....wish this guy the best he learned a valuable lesson the hard way.
Wow! This is the first time in SWU that I have the impression: he WANTS to be unhappy. The story could also have gone like this: "Biologically I wasn't able to have children. But now I have the chance to be a father! I love this little boy and he loves me. I will be the best father for him. I am blessed. Thank you, God!"
Come on. It's really not that simple. He's hurting. That has to be unbelievable painful. He does not want to be unhappy. His happiness was ripped away from him.
So uou have no ability to understand the shock, confusion, disbelief, anxiety and extreme hurt he feels as a result of being lured to believe he was the biological father ?
Can you imagine going 8 months waiting for your child being born, the child you never thought you'd experience to have.
Then the birth of this precious baby and you experience the most profound, pure love and happiness like nothing else you've ever felt in your whole life. It's a love like nothing else .
You live in this cocoon of love, bliss and unbelievable happiness for nine months finally having the family you've dreamt of for 40 years.
And suddenly you gwt words of the child not being yours but your partner says you're absolutely crazy for even asking her about the child not being yours.
Of course it's yours! Like, what's wrong with you for even thinking the thoughts of me lying to you about you being the father?
He takes the test and his whole existence is a lie!
You seriously don't understand why he did what he did?
You're for real telling me that yiu could just brushbawayvall the Lies, the hurt, the questioning your own insanity, the fact that your partner isn't all well in the head, and just go on like it's all fine?
@@leneo1731Very well put 👏👏!
@@RadRedhead222 Yes, of course I understand that. It's my general impression. I don't want to blame him. My point was: The end of this story could have been different. Im am sure that he has major psychological problems. I hope he will find professsional help and will be able to live a better life.
$6300 IS A HUGE PAYCHECK. Your blessed brother!
I was thinking the same thing... holy sh!t, I wonder what he was doing for work!
He said he was a waiter at the time he found out. I have…doubts.
This middle aged momma's boy might consider just being "Uncle Chad" to the boy because in reality he doesn't need a drug addict father with no stability in his life. This would create lots of problems as well as being a terrible example for the young boy to emulate. May you find peace, maturity and sobriety in your life Chad. Time is marching on.😢
So true , I get a heavy narcissistic vibe from this destructive individual
I’ve watched this several times, and I’m surprised at how my feelings have changed. At first I questioned some of his perceptions but had a lot of compassion for him. The more I hear him, the more I think he’s a raging narcissist. He loves to hear himself talk, he blames others for their indiscretions, but laughs about what a bully he was, about how they were a great match…he was selling drugs…haha…”that sounds funny but”…actually it sounds pathetic. Girls were “throwing themselves at him,” he was “the best” at this and that. He had a partner 20 years younger, either because he wanted power, or because women his age can read him like a cheap book. He has created all of his problems, rages at his misfortune, and willingly gave up the one thing he says he wanted because it triggered his shame and rage. I felt sorry for him the first few times, now I feel like he saved that child a lot of pain by removing himself from his life. His baby didn’t respond to him…”talking about beating a horse when it’s down.” So now the baby is a bit of a bad guy too. His partner left him in wreckage.” He may not be “the perfect saint.” Omg - how did I not see his rabid narcissism the first time. He may be mildly sociopathic or psychotic. He also thinks God is working through him. What a pill.
wow man, it's like this guy is walking down a dark tunnel and saw a light. it wasn't at the end of the tunnel, it was in the ceiling. he was able to climb out for a few months, then knocked back down to walk that tunnel looking for another light. sad.
that's life, good luck
"thank god i dont do opiates" he's in serious denial.
@Unfluencer no he's not...opiates are a whole other nightmare with much different problems and consequences
@@PrimateProductionsphysical safety wise at least for sure. Gotta do a whole lotta meth to die of it
@benson9907 yep..thats definitely one way they are hugely different
There's no denying Chad's life to this point has been tragic. I also think there's no denying there's some ADHD in there peppered in with a little covert narcissim. My opinion, not claiming I can diagnose. At 49, and with all the rehab and sober living, Chad sure can talk the talk. Therapy and adhd meds might help him actually walk the walk. Like Mark said, anyone can change...it's never too late.
Guy thinks dating a girl 20 years younger is a good idea based on his dynamic. 100% narcy. There's people with bigger problems they don't bring on themselves as tragic as half his story may be.
Yeah, he's the Real narcissist because he won't put up with her BS, not his wife that already had a dude on speed dial, during the week they broke up. It isn't uncommon for women to do that. Who's to say she wasn't playing him the whole time?
He doesn’t want to change
And there is no ADHD or LMNOP he’s a narcissist and a loser
@@aspartamekillsyaknow9019 time to see the forest through the trees. Whos to say yeah okay. Keep making excuses for him, his mommy's done that too his whole life and look where it got him!
@@aspartamekillsyaknow9019they can both be narcissists. And probably are. It's just that women narcissists are more heavily enabled by society.
I don't usually say negative, without knowing my facts... But he's 49 yrs old & is still talking about his grade 1 class?! Mommy's boy for sure AND. he, himself, loves his stepdad?? You seem to have held this event, life altering, as you, still are talking like a little boy. I understand your hurt, and wanting the truth is important ... However., you need to accept the good and bad in life.
God never promised you a Rose Garden... Along with the Sunshine... There's going to be a little rain sometimes.
You turned your back.. you did the same as your own father and used your hurt and bitterness, against that poor little boy 😲😢. Time to pull up your Big Boy Pants, instead of a toddler, teenage boy.
Sorry, not Sorry... This isn't depression... I, I, I, I, I, YADA, YADA, YADA... WOW, enough already.
welcome to the club 😊
@@Saer-s9u 😉🤭✌️
Am learning English through this videos
He's full of self-pity and continues to bank on what he was as a child to define him. A typical addict's mind. Emotional sobriety is MORE important than just eliminatiing the substance. Adversities in life will come everyday, the evil inner voice of addiction is just waiting for you to rationalize re-using only to compound the orgiinal problem. Recognizing your triggers is the work required to stay clean. Love the kid, lose the girl, your sobriety is the #1 priority. Everything else is not yours to control.
Are you an addict?
delusional mixed with arrogance.
spot on brother
I don't think he'll get sober unless he stops being so self-obsessed. In the whole story, he never once stops to think about that kiddo and how the kiddo is doing, only how the loss affected *him*.
Maybe the mom should go back thru her rolodex of one night stands and attempt to find the biological father. Maybe get the actual father involved and attempt to give the kid a normal life.
That kid isn’t this guys issue and from the sounds of it the mom and him didn’t make a good couple anyhow.
What do you expect
Ugh. Self-obsessed?! What a gross statement for someone that was hurt so bad. I'm sure you would say the same thing if it was a woman. Trash. I cringe for the men that have to interact with you. Self-obsessed is banging multiple dudes, supposively not even considering it could be multiple guys' baby, and doing nothing to make sure the real dad knew.
Ofcourse it's all about him and the loss of his honour. But as a woman, you are unable to understand this.
That’s what you get from all this..
The only real pain that hurts is knowing that your children are hurting.
So true. If they are not right,I am not right
Well looks like he won't have to worry about that no more.
He could have Borderline, the way he says he is kind of "self-sabotaging" etc. And how He describes His choices and Feelings. I hope He can get Help and be the Father He wants to be for His little one. If He Loved that little one Like a son....He IS your son! All the best!!!
bingo!!!!
Borderline what?
B@@ATeLLoZ
Borderline personality disorder
Often have maladaptive coping skills, self sabotage, difficulty maintaining sound relationships, poor regulation often rely on external controls to manage themselves- police, drugs/medication etc
@@MeghanS9883oooh ok! Thank you. I wasn’t sure what borderline you meant because you can be borderline alotta things ya know?? like me, I’m borderline crazy off the meat racks and some times I’m just chill as a cucumber 🥒 😎
lol, not at all. You don't have a clue what BPD is.
High blood pressure that you ignore? Would you like to have a stroke and then lay in a bed half paralyzed so then you can be even more depressed? Keep up the stimulants and you are going to get your wish. Get it together and stop feeling sorry for yourself. Call your mother before it’s too late. You are still young enough to have a good life so stop acting like a teenager and get the help you need. It won’t be easy, but you know you can do this. You still have time. Go!
Thank you for recording and posting this educational video. I hope you find peace in your future.
Being a father doesn’t mean blood. It means love and responsibility. A real man would step up to the plate, get clean and only then can you get the family that you want and dream of. It’s never too late. You let the adult shit get in the way of the child. The white picket fence is attainable but you have to look at it from a different perspective. I know men who have raised children that blood wasn’t a part of it. That’s what real men do in my opinion. I’m sure others will attack me in the comments but I have my reasons for my opinion. Experience makes you passionate and I don’t apologize for my stance. He is a good man at the bottom of this. He just needs to work on himself to attain what he is searching for. EDIT: I feel like he has done the same thing to this little boy that he claimed that his father did to him. Am I the only one interpreting like this?
bravo!!! it looks like the majority of comments agree with you! I sure do 😊 I've never seen anyone on Mark's channel bring me to anger. ... on a few levels.
🤡
Though you are absolutely correct in that a man can love a child just as much as if it was his after a betrayal like that it would be very difficult to go back to the mother after that and like he explained if he is not with the mother of the baby then he predicted she would insist he pay child support (which would be fine and all) however despite paying child support for the child because he is not the biological father she could use the babu as a pawn, keep him from seeing him...she would end up with someone else and not letters man continue to see the child and who wants to deal with that?
@@colettithekidyou're a clown? Don't worry we see it...its not really anything to boast about it....😏
Only a sucker would raise a child that is not his own. He was deceived and he rightful walked! It would be different if he actually adopted by his own will but in this case any man that continued to raise a child like this is a sucker pure and simple.
Why does he have to be the kid’s biological father to raise him and be his dad? So much unnecessary drama and bad advice from his mom. So much selfishness and immaturity. This dude reminds me of Will Ferrell in Step Brothers.
Love is Love. Do not deny your feelings. I raised two children. Not from my body. My mother is incapable of empathy. Blood does not matter. FU for taking that phone call. See the human, pick up the human. I don't understand who you are. By the way, once you accept a child in any capacity, they are yours...forever. They leave, marry, divorce, and come back. They call me Sherry. It's taken me almost 55 years to understand that to them that means Mom. Stop crying.
stfu trying to guilt him, the woman tried to run a scam on him. That kid won't have a father no matter how much anyone tries, he's a ticket to child support for a narcissist mother and nothing more until he's 18. The legal system has to be fixed to stop allowing that scam.
Go sit in on a family civil court for a day, 90% cases of women like her who would be just as content to see fathers water boarded if it meant they get a paycheck.
Normal people don't lie about somethlng as serious as who is the father, and they definitely don't turn on a dime when caught into a second tactic of using the existing attachment to apply guilt like a knife to the gut.
This guy's mom obviously had seen this before and carefully talked him out of getting scammed.
Normal people tell the truth and try to make it work. All she did was the math - the dad "pyro" was either a broke loser or someone who would never settle down, and this guy wanted a family, was recovering, making good money. He was just the better mark.
I predicted before I even got to the end of the interview she went after him for child support. I bet you a hundred she is simultaneously suing the biological father also.
Your situation was different snd you should just be extra thankful you were lucky enough to not even be aware this is a thing.
We're rooting for you, Chad!
Life threw Chad a lifeline, an amazing chance to turn around his life with the birth of Jameison. He loved that baby like no other, was a great dad and started working hard to support his son. He sabotaged it all by taking a paternity test, his name was on the birth certificate and everyone including himself was sure Jameison was his son. All a paternity test tells you is who was the sperm donor, not who is the father. Chad knew from personal experience how a sperm donor doesn't always make a man a good dad. Chad said his girlfriend didn't trust him to tell him the truth. But Chad didn't trust her either, otherwise why take a paternity test. Alternative story would have been set aside his ego, love that baby with his whole heart, marry Jameison's mother, settle down with his little family and be the best Chad he could be. He walked away from Jameison like his bio dad walked away from him. What Chad doesn't know is that at around 8-12 months of age, infants go through a fear of strangers period. Children are very sensitive to changes in their loved ones. After 3 weeks away, maybe Chad could have taken a little time to reconnect with Jameison. Sad.
except the mother was using the kid as a meal ticket. He wouldn't be allowed to be the father anyway. You obviously didn't listen, or you're a sister narc trying to help yourselves out.
How many guys do you collect child support from?
Perfectly said.
Scary that this is how women think.
I appreciate you sharing some of your story. I’m also struggling but wish the best for you
Bud just poured his heart out . Respect sir . Addiction always tells the perfect lie to our selves to destroy overcoming it. Don’t fall for the lie , you’re a strong person ❤
Biology does not make or unmake a father. Showing up consistently and loving a child matters more. I don’t blame him for dumping Lynette, but a big part of the problem was that she was 20 years younger. Bad decision. I read recently that alcoholics and addicts feel more sorry for themselves than most people. As a drinker, I think it’s true.
Yes, it absolutely does that’s your resources. That’s your legacy as a man that woman knew the whole time she was living a lie taking advantage of a guy because he was a better provisioner than the biological she could’ve told him at any point in time she is a horrible person. I would hate to have that woman as a mother of my child to begin with. I would not be part of any of that with her.
As if older women are any better in american culture
@@treehouse8501Well said and agreed!
@@SolorockinOneI didn’t say better-just more mature.
@@SolorockinOne In Fact they get worse as they age, especialy the ones who are still single lol
🙏✝️❤️ God bless you brother. Prayers sent man.
Maybe I have SWUB burn out, I turned this off, just another guy whining on and on, I am tired and out of sympathy for these types of people.
I feel for the child. He didn't have to leave the child. He wanted to be a dad, he could have been one. He walked away.
Non-biologic dads, moms, aunts, uncles, and others love children of all ages, and various circumstances, as if they were their own. So, why does Chad suddenly have a change of heart about this baby boy?
On the flip side, biological parents treat their own children terribly.
I am a bit confused as to why Chad feels this child is no longer his, just because the sperm did not drop from his penis. I could not make it through the video - did he go back and do a second test on him, the baby and the mother? Lab mistakes can and do happen.
Being of service & living to make someone else’s life better is way more fulfilling than living for yourself.
Stop being a victim and grow up. Your mom is an angel to have to put up with you💜❤️
My buddy raised his son and learned that the kid wasn't his. The boy just turned 16 and had come to California for a visit. It was the boy's biological father who reemerged and pressed the issue. The other man asked for a paternity test. Sure enough, the son wasn't my friend's. His ex had an affair (beware of women with a high body count) and was impregnated. She made my friend believe that he was the father. My friend didn't care, it was his son and continued to support and love this kid like his own.
That's awesome. Hopefully he got rid of the skank tho.
Female, with a high body count and no kids here. What a stupid thing to warn for a high body count. Getting pregnant has nothing to do with a body count. When I was around 25 statistically too many women around me were getting pregnant by their boyfriends 'accidentally'. I would be afraid of women wanting babies, not women wanting sex..
Also stop being a Victim and get your Shit Together!!!! JAMESON is who he is and needs u! AND stop focusing on who u don't want to be and stop the Street Drugs! TRUST ME. I am so completely versed in this shit! And well please life isn't all about the DNA etc.. i had a Step father from hell and the only parents i had were my Grandparents that i was forced to leave for 8 years...Get your shit together Chad!!!! And Cats are better than Dogs..lol
💯
The kid situation is just a huge story distraction from the real issue he doesn’t have any responsibility or sobriety. He knows what he needs he sits through the sober living and listens but goes right back to being selfish. Not changing behaviors
This interview is another one that BROKE me 😢😢😢 he deserves to be a dad/ grandfather. I really think it could be the makings of this man. He needs to be needed❤ wishing you the best Chad
He strikes me as a whiny, self-absorbed boor. I cannot imagine why he thinks his "poor me...I don't understand why life is not perfect for me because I'm SUCH A GOOD GUY" b.s. is of interest to real people.
Halfway though and can’t bear another second!! Torture to my ears!!!!!
I FEEL BAD FOR THIS GUY , BUT HE NEEDS TO GROW SOME BALLS!
This guy kinda stands out as a sociopath or megalomaniac if you ask me. Yeah theres tragedy in his life and Im not saying its brought on by his own will but the guy goes back and forth with blame then it always goes back to something about him on another topic like his widows peak. Sounds like he doesn't know what to blame anything on like part of him is trying to admit something but ego wont allow it.
wife is lucky to have him gone .... and lucky for the son too.
Wonder how many times he says "I me or my"in these 42 mins, I'm out after 10 mins bc I wasted fifteen years with a narc and can't listen to their self serving bs
You are exactly wrong that woman is a sociopath megalomaniac. Do you know good and well she knew the whole time it wasn’t his kid, but knew he would be a better provisioner so she went along with the lie after betraying him that is like the ultimate to commit paternity fraud.
why do you use words you don't understand? Are you afraid people will know you're not intelligent if you don't?
In my opinion, it doesn't matter that he's not yours, he needs a dad and a dad is more than just a sperm donor. Please man up and be his dad, Jamison needs you.
He really gives great advice on listening to others who went before. Thankyou
Chad, please know you ARE worth everything YOU deserve. There is only ONE very special you. You are a handsome man with a beautiful heart inside and out. A kindness that runs deep through the rivers of your soul.
You have integrity and morals. We are all born with positive attributes and everything to succeed. It's the way of others that introduce the wrongs and hurts that set the paths in life and then to be left with overcoming the challenges to correct and change for the right it's that gut intuition.
I feel your situation being in the deep valleys of life but look up and overcome that mountain before you. For you will be stronger and oh so fulfilled with the glorious view of YOUR Horizon. To conquer all that has come against you and truly FEEL from within all that you accomplish. There lays a full life ahead of you. You've DONE it already and I KNOW you will again. Love and regard yourself the way your Mother and your loved ones do.
Don't worry about child support. Your paternity proves it all.
Wonderful things are coming for you. Embrace the good and best. Forget about the rest.
So many believe in you and so do I.
Love and Prayers from Iowa!
It's all about him .
Yup.
No 💩 look at the title!
This guy is a sweetheart and self aware. Accountable. The story of Jameson is very sad. Sending you love, man.
Accountability 0
I get narcissistic yuk
Me too I completely agree...
@@wendy6280yeah well you likely have issues with most people...or most men at least...😏
bit of a rambling methy vibe. A lot of crying and not many tears...
This guy is too self absorbed.
I am sorry about the pain. I can relate. But all bets are off,
, as long as you are using, ALL OF THEM!
Man I love this guy. Hopefully the outpouring of love he needs will shine through in this comment section enough for this man to realize that yes, he is worth it.
unfortunately some people will kick him when he's down.
@@reneelibby4885 unfortunately you are right but hopefully love prevails!
He’s being a Chad!
I don't get why he can't still be a dad to Jameson ?
I don't either. This pissess me off. I have no clue who my biological parents are. This baby did nothing wrong.
He is afraid of child support that’s what he’s a fair weather father as long as the bills are paid he’s daddy but oops when he has to pay then it’s see ya kid
Sure I could feel sorry for him but he made the choice to play the victim and go about slobbering and groaning about how bad his life has been and is
Oh woe is me - boo hoo
SMH
He explains why he removed himself from the child's life. It has nothing to do with child support.
@@imbroken3860 Nope
because the mother wouldn't allow him to be the father anyway. Classic narcissistic woman scam to sleep around to get pregnant to anchor a guy who they can collect a paycheck from. Even when her plan went off the rails she is still spending thousands to tens of thousands on a lawyer to establish child support. You think that's normal behavior?
Her mistake was thinking he would stay clean and make good money, now she's probably crying and blaming him for her problems to any gullible guy who will listen in hopes she'll find a white knight sucker. Narcissists aren't always the brightest.
.....soooooo many youth dabbling in drugs and the "streets" need to hear this testimony, it just might deter their worst mistake. Some set-backs cost you years of life that you can NEVER get back. PEACE Brother Chad, God bless your steps with Grace, Mercy, Wisdom, and Favor. Brother Mark, God bless and STRENGTHEN you.
"At this point in my life, jail is a waste is time." That was funny. 😂Like jail was an option.
Weak men cause chaos, strong men create peace.
🤡
@@craigslist6988 We as men operate on reality not on feelings...
@@cinderellaresearch74 🦸🤡
She was 20yrs younger. You picked an immature girl, obviously for her body, over anything else.
Victim blaming
@@user-bi4tr2lj4m truth hurts
@@user-bi4tr2lj4mbig time!
@@user-bi4tr2lj4m
But still...
Chad, you're there to take that leap and start down the road of recovery. You're standing on that edge but you're doubting yourself. Reach out brother and just ask for help. It's there. You can 100% hit that road to recovery running. Take that leap of faith Chad.
Dude... move on. And for God's sake stop whining about it. You love the kid that much? Go be his Dad. I seriously doubt the other guy will ever get in your way
It all comes down to the excuses we tell to justify our choices dont it?
@@julybutterflyI like your brain 😊
@@julybutterfly well said✌️
Good luck to him for the healing process. The guy's going through a tough time, I wish him the best 🙏
STOP using Jameson as an excuse for your poor behaviour. People have been through far worse and were able to pull themselves out of addiction. Grow some and push forward. Take some responsibility for your actions 🙄
This is so sad. This man is just devastated but he is that child's father. Even though they're not linked by DNA he's still that child's father. That little boy loves him and sees him as his father.
Sometimes life knocks you down . You can feel and cry and other shit but eventually you have to grow and learn from it and get up get out of the drugs and keep moving. Sometimes ppl just make excuses to keep doing that bs , you gotta be strong and take control over those wants n needs.
Hard to see poeple struggle so much. I know we all have issues but some just stay wrapped up in them. I wish you the best man and i hope you figure it out and become what you want to be in life. Best of luck brother!!!
“ I was the lead server….. I had the most yelps “ tells a heartbreaking story about his son not being his, still manages to give his self some kudos.
Prayers Chad I really hope you find some peace and comfort am healing ❤️🩹
Biology means little to nothing. Being a parent does not require you to share the same DNA with your child.
When I listen to him, he sounds like an unstable person, vindictive, immature. It is better for the child to move away from him, it is sad but better for the child in the long run. If he had fallen in love with his son, he would never have taken that step. I mean paternity testing, I think he secretly wanted it, to get rid of everything. Fathers don't act like him.
It sounds like you are a wonderful father to him, regardless of the biological paternity. Being a parent is about love, not blood ❤
😆
Did you miss the part where after he found out he booked it the hell outta the kids life, went back to drugs and lives homeless on the streets for the last 4yrs. Perhaps editing your comment from "you are a wonderful father", to "You were a wonderful father" or "you had the potential to become a wonderful father and fucked up your chance"....theyd be more accurate.
Eta: child was born in 2017, it's 2024. Jamieson is 7yrs old now and hasn't a clue who Chad is I'm willing to bet.
@@julybutterfly deceiving a man into raising another man’s kid is severe blow on a biological level. It’s not something you can dismiss and go about your merry way.
@@colettithekid that may be (the blow to ego and the reality) however Chad still had a chance to continue to parent the child he had been parenting for 9 months. He had the CHOICE to forgive and remain a parent in the childs life. No one would expect he stay in a romantic relationship with the mother, however there was forgiveness choice there too. Remember, at the time the mother was only 24, the human brain is only fully developed by 25. Chad was 44 at the time and a full fledged adult who reacted like a child with zero maturity. Thems is just excuses he tells himself. Infantile and narcissistic. There's zero excuses here. Cooling off period for a chance to think with logic brain and not emotion brain warranted of course, but Chad 7 years later is still not thinking with logic brain, and likely never will unless he gets into recovery of some sort.
Women can’t be held responsible for their bad behavior until they’re 25. There’s a new one. 😆
Only made it 12 minutes in and his story hurts too much. Much love, Chad! Hoping you come out of that tailspin and start soaring higher than ever!
Oh man I’m 4 min in and boy oh boy this is gonna be a rough one 😔
It's NEVER to late to get help. You seem like a nice guy and your worth it! Jameson will know the truth some day. I don't think he is gone out of your life. There are lot's of good people out there. We can't pick our parents. I had an uncle who I adored. I had an Aunt different side of the family, she was my confidant and helped me so much. Good Luck.
Sometimes, having answers will ruin what you love. Sometimes, it will ruin you. Careful what door you knock on ppl. If you are happy, in the words of John Lennon, “let it be”
Moved a lot, abandoned by dad, are not reasons to continue using when you know that using is THE REASON your life is s**t
If you want sobriety, you’ll find a way to be sober. Gotta want it.
Lennon and McCartney wrote the song, but McCartney sang it
Knowing your child is hurting hurts the most. 💔
Broke up for a week and a half...broke up for a year and a half...odd how he goes back and forth on that detail. And how does he know who the real father is? "Pyro" didn't take a paternity test, I assume. Strange reasoning for taking a paternity test in the first place. He made a lot of assumptions about what would happen in the future if he stayed and/or if he left. A PhD in "Family Orientation"? If so, you'd think he could have handled the situation with a lot more depth and perseverance...except he was in deep addiction for decades. Did the mother use? Maybe there was a good reason for the break up. She might not have lied; she might have genuinely believed Chad was the father. Another detail: a non biological father is not liable to pay for child support. There are a lot of paths Chad could have taken to remain in the child's life; he chose to leave. This story is a mess.
Also if the child has his last name?
surely a different side to this story.
I'm usually a bit more sympathetic but this story hit me hard. Did the (Real) Dad that groomed him to be a calculating manipulative
Ice cream money thief
Ice cream big shot
Solar plexus puncher
Firecracker of a bully ever take a paternity test? His wording was unsettling to me because he lacked a measurement for what he lost because of his nobody's gonna do me dirty mentality. I think he may have let himself off the hook at every snag and he states he is an opportunist. She was 20 years his junior. He has bad behavior and a dedicated history of poor performance. He said himself he gets triggered by people coming in to his life.
A chick 20 years his senior meets him when he has a trans am and he waits tables at a swanky place. They have a tumultuous coupling followed by a fight in which they break up and she immediately upon reconciliation begins to flower and full out physically. Did he ride her about paternity during that 9months? He doesn't mention loving her once. The baby is born and he says the boy "lights up like no other" when he comes around? Given time would he shower with his son like his dad did? Would he teach him about the solar plexus. He needs a story of victory over pulling the scales from his eyes. He sees nothing correctly. Unfortunately. Like a domino effect. I've never seen it so clearly as here. But then I am just learning to look.
chill out karen they're not going to take away your child support check.
@@craigslist6988 You're the one who needs to chill out. From the number and type of comments you've made about this video and other people's reactions to it, you seem to have an agenda. As for me, a "child support check" doesn't figure in to anything about my life.
Regardless of what others feel about this guy we all have feelings and everyone’s breaking point is different. I feel bad that he got strung along, he thought the boy was here and he was invested in being a dad and I think he was happy and looking forward to being a father. None of us have a crystal ball to look back in time or forward. His heart was broken.