Self Actualization is when what Rumi puts out beautifully: "Do we ever reach a point when we no longer need to be loved? "Yes, when we become love," he replied
This video literally blew my mind. It actually explained so much of who I am. I grew up in a very abusive home with both my dad and mom physically abusing me. I always wondered why I was such an anxious person. Why I worry so much, why I always feel UGLY even though people assure me I'm not.
Same. It’s really painful. Just FYI, the past 6 months I’ve been doing a self-directed neuroplasticity program called Dynamic Neural Retraining System (DNRS) - and it’s been incredibly helpful and transformational. My anxiety is A LOT lower, and my JOY is A LOT higher! Our brains CAN be rewired! Thank God!
Perhaps you may be suffering from what the psychologist Erik Erikson called the Trust and Mistrust when you are less than 18 months old. You abusive parents may not foster a trust worthy environment for example they did not deliver immediate attention to you when you start crying. This foster a mistrust character later in your adulthood. As a result you will have adjustment problem with the people you associated with. I therefor suggest you read up some self improvement books to correct you behavioral problems, some TH-cam videos also help you along in fixing your character problem of mistrusting other people's opinions. See you later Oi Shirley, persevere , don't give up hope , there are many people that are worst off than you. 😷🦊🦛🦖🐢🐤🐝👩🏿❤️👨🏼👼🦻✍️🧣🧸🧮🥞🍅🪑❄️
At least it makes sense for you. I didn't grow up in an abusive household, and I still suffer from those perceptions. Maybe the abuse came from elsewhere, it's incredibly difficult for me to find the source of my insecurities.
Self-Actualization for me is to become aware of my own behavior and habits, good and bad. By becoming more aware of how I am affecting people and processes around me I can also learn how to adjust and correct my behavior to spread more joy around me whilst also achieving my goals in specific situations.
What you wrote is called - high conscientiousness, Self-Actualization is to use all your abilities and talents (called Potential) for your own welfare and for society as well...
Carl Rogers did not talk about 'reaching' self-actualization! In Rogers' theory self-actualization is the constant, ongoing process of reconstituting the sense of self, it is not an end point. It includes personal change and growth, and the letting go of parts of the self-concept that are no longer worth keeping. It is the process of becoming, in accordance with our innate 'organismic' tendencies, yet within the setting of our wider interpersonal relationships and socio-cultural world. In Rogers' day the biological mechanisms of self-actualization were unclear. Nowadays we would talk about neural integration, genes, and neuroplasticity. Actualization is therefore a process tending toward 'regression toward the gene' over time, and self-actualization is how the self attempts to reorganise itself in a more authentic configuration.
I don’t know enough about that to criticise or praise it. So it’s potential realised, but it will never be, completely, because it always has to change?
The difference between us and animals are our brain abilities. The fact that we can solve problems by innovating instead of evolving allows us to become stronger, smarter, and much more. When anything gets hard, just question it and give the time it takes.
Continued: 3... I would attest to all Maslow’s qualities for S.A. including how the more one is true to one’s own individual nature, the deeper one goes, the more universally true it is (counter-intuitive to our egos!). It is a delight, a pleasure of Being-in-itself, even if one’s life, outer life, of work and relationships and challenges can be as difficult or impossible as ever - although such self-actualisation tendencies eventually seems to order life far more harmoniously, it is not always going to be the case! Life as a human seems to be almost always rather tricky and also messy! :) I would add to or qualify Maslow’s characteristics of a self-actualising human-being, in that a sense of Wholeness, along with our ‘parts’ -body and soul, heart and mind, all seem to be operative and relatively free/un-neurotic, free to be themselves and to be healthy; and that when we are whole, without neurosis or egoic-defence, we face reality as it is, we indeed, like the Buddhist sages talk of, work with what IS: we see the current and move harmoniously with it (which doesn’t mean ‘conformity’)… In the mind, we have sanity (this feels such a humanistic, human quality indeed! ...and is not ‘normality’ but rather a real good sense of reality, and a way we can deal with reality without the deceptive games of ‘ego’; so it does seem like we perceive reality quite clearly, but are aware that this is often limited by our own mood and state. Moments of absolute genius or absolute creativity can be quite common or extreme (-like Einstein experienced for his relativity theories - receiving them first in a flash-of-insight, which -according to anecdote, he humbly knew them to be right before being checked with mathematical-rigour! It does seem both intuition and logic, or reason, work alongside each other very well in the same human-being (whereas before, they seem to exist in different types of ‘people’) In terms of the feelings or the Heart, there seems to be this good-heartedness (Like the Buddhists talk of, beneath the ego, unlike Freud’s suspicion, and in spite of the innate selfishness from having an animal-nature and shadow-tendencies (such a person is acutely aware of all of themselves - including these sides naturally), there seems to be, nevertheless, -stronger or more fundamental than all those, a ‘basic goodness’ that is innate and that we knew we had as children before we were socialised and needed to ‘fit in’. It might not always look like ‘goodness’ from the outside, but would still nevertheless delight in true kindness and sees Goodness as a kind of whole-in-itself -beyond the ‘good-and-bad’ of our relative personalities. Moreover, such ‘Bonhomie’ is not relative to a particular societies’ morality, but is, rather, just self-evident in wanting to make the world a better place for oneself and everyone. Similarly, instead of just mere/pure altruism, there seems to be a Healthy Self-love as well as love of another, and these can be essentially balanced since the being may see it is the same Self or Beingness present in two (or more) separate individual body-minds. And in a similar fashion, the ability to care for another is also equal in caring for oneself, and such a one can do this so wholesomely! Such a one is also not stranger to and is not fazed, disrespectful to emotional disharmonies and would not judge another for having strong anger, fear, sadness, etc. as these are all part of our learning and emotional-equipment as human beings; they are merely temporary manifestations, which may or may not be useful experiences for this particular individual in this particular… context. There is a maturity of attitude with a (-paradoxical for mechanical minds perhaps,) playful inner child which probably provides most of the Fuel for Creativity… So it seems this human-being not only is a Good person inside, but is also more naughty or mischievous - albeit in a non-harming way, than the average person; indeed the best of both worlds! To be continued ~~~
We were taught that Maslow's hierarchy of needs is like a pyramid built of blocks where all the pieces support each other and if even one piece is missing or removed, the pyramid becomes unstable and it endangers the other blocks and the pyramid can collapse under its own weight. Therefore, all blocks are equally important and needed.
Luxury lifestyle brands and social media companies hit esteem and self-actualization needs pretty well, however, they give only but shadows of those needs - a false sense of self-esteem and self-actualization.
I was born in a loving home with the coolest parents ever. I've always felt loved by both of them, they never made me feel like I wasn't good enough or that grades mattered that much. And that hasn't stopped me from being anxious most of my late middle school to highschool years. Nevertheless I've always been a good student up until college. For some reason I just don't get what i'm doing wrong, and that basically destroyed my self-esteem (which I've linked to how well I'm doing at school pretty much my whole life)... It is now reflecting on my relationship with my boyfriend, who is doing much better than I am in college, and we recently broke up because of how much I felt inferior to him. I've never stopped being told i'm a smart girl with a lot to offer, which ended up frustrating me even more because I'm still struggling with figuring out what is it that i'm not doing right to succeed again. This is why I think the negative atmosphere at home, strict parents and "conditional love" is kind of a simplistic explanation to go with. Or do you consider that being raped by a close member of the family counts as an example of that too, (which I have been as a child)? Hope that wasn't too hard to read lol i'm just looking for ways to improve on myself and maybe get back with my now ex boyfriend, or just be a better version of myself overall
Mayssem Mosbah - you have well challenged the intro-level Self-Actualization Humanist premise as presented here. It is possible to be open, have empathy, be positive in outlook and be generous, yet still have feelings of sadness, or tristesse, or sakura and so on. Self-actualization is not a promise of happy dopamine its more a pathway towards endorphic feelings of fulfillment despite set-backs and adversities. Considering the painful childhood revelation in your post, I would suggest if you could find a Gestalt Therapist might be very worthwhile for you all the same. There is some deep incongruence in having unconditionally loving parents and yet still find yourself the victim of family abuse.
@@0590-q7r well I am sorry to hear that, although it can take until years later for the benefits to filter through into your emotional life. Best wishes to you.
Self actualization is, when you are decisive over problems and your only basis to resolve it is your experience. You should'nt care what other people say, because you are no other's pet who acts only because of obedience to other.
It’s easy to spot!! All you have to do is pay attention to what irritates you in others. Let’s say you are involved with someone who doesn’t have much concept of time & you are right different. Like by the time they are in the car headed there. You are already otw back. It might be something you do not even realizing you are doing. These people are placed in your life to teach you a lesson. Sometimes several. Sometimes it takes longer than others. Some stay for a season. Some stay for several😶.
Elon Musk did not have a happy childhood full of love. That's why he spent his time reading books in his room. This goes against the methods psychologists use to make you a better person. Elon used his knowledge and his opportunities. Maybe we're too sensitive nowadays.
Might Elon Musk be a little over concerned with the basic needs of resources? I fail to see how he's reached belonging, love, esteem, and self-actualization when he's so excessively concerned with the accumulation of wealth and with expanding the business.
KahL Sama Good well imagined possibility. But, what if he was never that sensitive, and that’s why some people of high IQ, and probably on the autistic spectrum do so well. I suppose his knowledge and abilities are very marketable too.
Not everyone has the need for self-actualization, but those who have it is showing it. They are the people that get up early, is always studying, and always trying to become a better person
@@dylongarrett4779 It may depend!Some people wake up earlier not cause their driven but are being forced by the system. Jobs to go to,to make a living!
@Ken Able I know that, just stating the fact that u can be forced by circumstances to be driven or waking early as he just stated. Waking up early doesn't necessarily mean that u have reached a point of self actualization.
wow, this is not quite how I see things... This is a very ‘Western’, and almost Business and almost academic presentation kind of approach of Self-actualisation, -where the notions of ‘success’ are mentioned so much… I think an actualising human-being will see ‘success’ as very relative; perhaps in how many people are helped or intrigued by something, more than how much money one can make for oneself; to be fair, the narrator does imply that it is philanthropic or Good deeds that really motivate or fulfil them… But -for me, as for Rogers and Maslow, these truths are Self-evident or Intuitive… arising out of highly individualistic inner-venturing but are universally repeated in 0ther self-actualising individuals… The paradoxical truth that being true to my unique individuality is more or less inseperable from the Universe, what is ultimately most true of all indivuduals deep down… For me, as Maslow seems to hone-in on in some of his writings, it is about this Universal Human-self or Beingness that we all are and all 'have' -though as this video rightly suggests, we are not all equally open to it partly down to upbringing but partly (something the video neglected, but is the Crucial factor for me) down to attitude… Moreover, A. Maslow & C. Rogers are at pains to state that it is not merely how one is loved or brought-up, although one would deduce that a healthy parenting will allow a more rounded-development of the character of the growing-child! (-always a good start!) While I think this video completely over-does the role of control, this nevertheless picks up on the other important pre-requisite that I have just highlighted -our attitude: attitude, is like ‘spirit’ and is something that we can not only have some control over, but is crucially HOW we meet life’s challenges and values. So people needing to be themselves, their full Selves, to be truly + fully alive, over and above safety and conformity will very likely go towards it, make those choices and do those activities that help bring this about: I think anyone with such an attitude/set-of-values will at least taste it if not find it altogether -or for it to find them… I say the latter, for -like ‘Enlightenment’ (you mention that word, which usually means the pinnacle of Spiritual development, in the East at least), it is not something you can command, but if you have the right attitude, spirit, etc. it may find you, or it may not... For I find one can only put oneself in the conditions of it, and these aren’t mechanical but more open, less certain… more ‘spiritual’, -about one’s attitude and qualities such as nobility, adventurousness/bravery - so, for instance, one who is very honest to themselves -who wants to see themselves as they are (In spite of the ‘ego’ in them just wanting to see what it wants - such a being needs to be aware of and honest to themselves about all these things!); who wants to be themselves above all - who, for some reason or rhyme, just cannot live a second-hand life of conformity/’normality’ but need to live from their living true ‘essence’ and being. This may explain its relative rarity -people still today want to conform, and are just as conditioned (Maslow predicted 1% or less of the total population were anywhere near what could be considered ‘self-actualising’). I would qualify this as that it is still as rare as that in its pure form, but many more have tastes of it, perhaps due to this attitudinal way of seeing things seeping into (western)societies - anyone, not only artists, scientists, creative or originators, but anyone in more ‘menial’ occupations, can have a self-actualising attitude and approach to life, relationships, work, leisure and parenting… Indeed, from what I mentioned above, it is as if there is this Universal-Human-Beingness, this sane, free, evolved way of being that is self-evident and from this, for those who see and experience this, we can see that many human activities seems to come from it and express it at least partially…In this light maybe most of us, maybe nearly all of us participate in it without realising at some point, -when lost in musical creativity, creating something out of nothing, having an interesting interaction with our child, making love, some of our amazing dreams at night, etc. etc. The difference is this is more rare, haphazard, and may just be a good hour, etc. whereas for the individual more or less established in it, these things are a norm rather than the exception. End of note one~~~Cont'd in note 2:
It's both, just with a newly defined meaning. Nothing unusual - thousands of terms have been adapted from English into other languages in the same way...
More... from me, to coninue... Note 2: It is not necessarily on the outside that one can recognise these sort of people, but from knowing them somehow from the inside… Even then, who’s to ‘say’? It is such an intuitive a factor, known by one’s subjective experiencing (but subjective in a healthy, whole sense) - unlike the ‘psychology’ of today which tries to be a ‘science’, but in my view, can NEVER EVER BE! How can something as amorphous or unfathomable as our psyches -as they are in actuality, be something that can be seen and grasped by science!? Real and proper science has to have such a tight handle on its variables, there is no way on earth this can happen! Maslow (more than Rogers) was ‘certain’ that his insights will be able to be scientifically-verified! I understand why he had this wish, -being in such an academic mileau - needing to impress his colleagues (-which, I think, was his only mistake -something he laboured in vain in his books... Alas, he could not see that he would never please his ‘scientific’ community unless hey already had a pre-existing intuition in this sort of stuff. This is not to say that such an intuition cannot work along side-by-side with objective science very harmoniously!) The thing about ‘self-actualisation’ is that there are no definite edges or solid boxes to tick least of all ‘scientifically’; it is much more subtle than that - and quite rightly so -as is anything truly valuable in life! The best things in life, Love, Beauty, etc. one can see, cannot be ‘objectified’ to another in any way, but are always experiences of the individual- even if we still sense intuitively that they ARE potentially universal! Another feature -often neglected, seems to be those who have faced certain difficulties in themselves, challenges head-on -so much so that they have been transformed by it!… They seem to learn something that can never be taken away from them - something that is their OWN, and that is -in a way, deserved by their bravery and honesty and fidelity to the life inside them, amongst other things. Some too, may be forced to confront something so wholly and still get transformed, and this can be seen as their particular luck or fate (perhaps what happened to Eckhart Tolle!?) rather than because of their attitude and noble qualities! These are the kind of attitudes and qualities such a human being has who then can stumble upon it, as I did, but I go in and out (-mainly out) of it, I am very grateful that it is something I know and can attest to, and will certainly Go Towards; and I can see and recognise it in another sometimes…As has been said, if we know ourselves really as we are, then we are not fooled by another, we can see where they’re at psychologically, for we have seen all these things in ourselves. To be continued ~~~
Elon Musk as a person to study. Sure you can study him but he is NOT an example of self-actualization. He is an example of being entitled, narcissistic, condescending, patronizing and a monster of his own making. He does not exemplify the qualities of generosity, compassion, and wanting to pay it forward to others.
I have seen Monkeys farming. So you do not need to be human to farm. I have seen Swine dining in 5-star restaurants. I have seen the killer cats plot and plan for selfish reasons. Being Human is to not be imitators, living of carnal desires, and to be selfless.
Well, although I am a Humanist, I would be careful with any science preceded by a world-view qualification, like humanist, feminist, Christian, Islamic, Arian, communist or whatever. I'm not aware of any case where id it not mislead the followers of these kinds of science in their job to see and describe the world how it is. How the world should as academic study is (entailed by) ethics. I'm really not sure, if Hitler and Stalin for example did not self-actualize very well.
The video is actually incorrect. Self actualisation is not enlightenment. Maslow's first 5 level theory was expanded upon to have 8 levels which included transcendance!
I don’t understand where successful people fits into all of this because success if subjective I wouldn’t really define Ron musk successful he seems boring and weird. People convincing themselves they have self actualised are just lying to themselves more than anyone so they think they have answers, no one has answers everything is subjective and you change on the daily
Hold up. Elon Musk albeit, successful, is not healthy. He’s infamous for his childish tantrums and tacitly admits himself that he’s not healthy when he speaks on how his work ethic is extremely painful for him.
It would to this page well if this video can be updated to remove the likeness of the black woman to portray the abusive parent. It is stereotypical and in poor taste as a psychological learning resource.
Self Actualization is when what Rumi puts out beautifully:
"Do we ever reach a point when we no longer need to be loved? "Yes, when we become love," he replied
my 2nd older sister's name is rumi
Aaah thats nice !! But I was referring to the great Persian Mystic and Spiritual being Jalāluddīn Rūmī :)
Thats where we reach the breaking point and tend to love ourself.
oo damn haha
And suddenly, I understand self actualization just from this comment. Thank you!
This video literally blew my mind. It actually explained so much of who I am. I grew up in a very abusive home with both my dad and mom physically abusing me. I always wondered why I was such an anxious person. Why I worry so much, why I always feel UGLY even though people assure me I'm not.
I feel you.
Oi Shirley you are not alone, dear!
Same. It’s really painful. Just FYI, the past 6 months I’ve been doing a self-directed neuroplasticity program called Dynamic Neural Retraining System (DNRS) - and it’s been incredibly helpful and transformational. My anxiety is A LOT lower, and my JOY is A LOT higher! Our brains CAN be rewired! Thank God!
Perhaps you may be suffering from what the psychologist Erik Erikson called the Trust and Mistrust when you are less than 18 months old. You abusive parents may not foster a trust worthy environment for example they did not deliver immediate attention to you when you start crying. This foster a mistrust character later in your adulthood. As a result you will have adjustment problem with the people you associated with. I therefor suggest you read up some self improvement books to correct you behavioral problems, some TH-cam videos also help you along in fixing your character problem of mistrusting other people's opinions. See you later Oi Shirley, persevere , don't give up hope , there are many people that are worst off than you. 😷🦊🦛🦖🐢🐤🐝👩🏿❤️👨🏼👼🦻✍️🧣🧸🧮🥞🍅🪑❄️
At least it makes sense for you. I didn't grow up in an abusive household, and I still suffer from those perceptions. Maybe the abuse came from elsewhere, it's incredibly difficult for me to find the source of my insecurities.
Self-Actualization for me is to become aware of my own behavior and habits, good and bad. By becoming more aware of how I am affecting people and processes around me I can also learn how to adjust and correct my behavior to spread more joy around me whilst also achieving my goals in specific situations.
What you wrote is called - high conscientiousness, Self-Actualization is to use all your abilities and talents (called Potential) for your own welfare and for society as well...
It's hard to show humility and kindness when you don't have a piece of bread on your table.
*Maslow intensifies.*
that hit home
O'SSÉIN - Master Your Mind With Me exactly.
Dang... that’s the best explanation for this theory I’ve ever heard.
This is one of the reasons why capitalism is such an abhorrent system
Yes Exactly, That's why a safe and balanced society is hypothetical.
Keep your best wishes, close to your heart and watch what happens...
Carl Rogers did not talk about 'reaching' self-actualization! In Rogers' theory self-actualization is the constant, ongoing process of reconstituting the sense of self, it is not an end point. It includes personal change and growth, and the letting go of parts of the self-concept that are no longer worth keeping. It is the process of becoming, in accordance with our innate 'organismic' tendencies, yet within the setting of our wider interpersonal relationships and socio-cultural world. In Rogers' day the biological mechanisms of self-actualization were unclear. Nowadays we would talk about neural integration, genes, and neuroplasticity. Actualization is therefore a process tending toward 'regression toward the gene' over time, and self-actualization is how the self attempts to reorganise itself in a more authentic configuration.
I don’t know enough about that to criticise or praise it. So it’s potential realised, but it will never be, completely, because it always has to change?
The best of what psychology and personal development have to offer these days is an evolution of many of the ideas in this video. Good stuff!
Already self. Actualizing myself for a year or so and its been doing me good
The difference between us and animals are our brain abilities. The fact that we can solve problems by innovating instead of evolving allows us to become stronger, smarter, and much more. When anything gets hard, just question it and give the time it takes.
Continued:
3...
I would attest to all Maslow’s qualities for S.A. including how the more one is true to one’s own individual nature, the deeper one goes, the more universally true it is (counter-intuitive to our egos!). It is a delight, a pleasure of Being-in-itself, even if one’s life, outer life, of work and relationships and challenges can be as difficult or impossible as ever - although such self-actualisation tendencies eventually seems to order life far more harmoniously, it is not always going to be the case! Life as a human seems to be almost always rather tricky and also messy! :)
I would add to or qualify Maslow’s characteristics of a self-actualising human-being, in that a sense of Wholeness, along with our ‘parts’ -body and soul, heart and mind, all seem to be operative and relatively free/un-neurotic, free to be themselves and to be healthy; and that when we are whole, without neurosis or egoic-defence, we face reality as it is, we indeed, like the Buddhist sages talk of, work with what IS: we see the current and move harmoniously with it (which doesn’t mean ‘conformity’)…
In the mind, we have sanity (this feels such a humanistic, human quality indeed! ...and is not ‘normality’ but rather a real good sense of reality, and a way we can deal with reality without the deceptive games of ‘ego’; so it does seem like we perceive reality quite clearly, but are aware that this is often limited by our own mood and state. Moments of absolute genius or absolute creativity can be quite common or extreme (-like Einstein experienced for his relativity theories - receiving them first in a flash-of-insight, which -according to anecdote, he humbly knew them to be right before being checked with mathematical-rigour! It does seem both intuition and logic, or reason, work alongside each other very well in the same human-being (whereas before, they seem to exist in different types of ‘people’)
In terms of the feelings or the Heart, there seems to be this good-heartedness (Like the Buddhists talk of, beneath the ego, unlike Freud’s suspicion, and in spite of the innate selfishness from having an animal-nature and shadow-tendencies (such a person is acutely aware of all of themselves - including these sides naturally), there seems to be, nevertheless, -stronger or more fundamental than all those, a ‘basic goodness’ that is innate and that we knew we had as children before we were socialised and needed to ‘fit in’. It might not always look like ‘goodness’ from the outside, but would still nevertheless delight in true kindness and sees Goodness as a kind of whole-in-itself -beyond the ‘good-and-bad’ of our relative personalities. Moreover, such ‘Bonhomie’ is not relative to a particular societies’ morality, but is, rather, just self-evident in wanting to make the world a better place for oneself and everyone. Similarly, instead of just mere/pure altruism, there seems to be a Healthy Self-love as well as love of another, and these can be essentially balanced since the being may see it is the same Self or Beingness present in two (or more) separate individual body-minds. And in a similar fashion, the ability to care for another is also equal in caring for oneself, and such a one can do this so wholesomely!
Such a one is also not stranger to and is not fazed, disrespectful to emotional disharmonies and would not judge another for having strong anger, fear, sadness, etc. as these are all part of our learning and emotional-equipment as human beings; they are merely temporary manifestations, which may or may not be useful experiences for this particular individual in this particular…
context.
There is a maturity of attitude with a (-paradoxical for mechanical minds perhaps,) playful inner child which probably provides most of the Fuel for Creativity… So it seems this human-being not only is a Good person inside, but is also more naughty or mischievous - albeit in a non-harming way, than the average person; indeed the best of both worlds!
To be continued ~~~
Your point about the environment and how it impacts congruent views in people was fantastic, really good video
0:39 humanist theory as a theory against the demeaning behaviourism, ___exercising control over personality of who you become.
Behaviourist believed that humans are subject to conditioning and could be affected by external factors and that they had no controls over personality
Self-actualization is when you get to do what you want do without needing to ask permission from another or a group. You are the boss in other words.
We were taught that Maslow's hierarchy of needs is like a pyramid built of blocks where all the pieces support each other and if even one piece is missing or removed, the pyramid becomes unstable and it endangers the other blocks and the pyramid can collapse under its own weight. Therefore, all blocks are equally important and needed.
Luxury lifestyle brands and social media companies hit esteem and self-actualization needs pretty well, however, they give only but shadows of those needs - a false sense of self-esteem and self-actualization.
I was born in a loving home with the coolest parents ever. I've always felt loved by both of them, they never made me feel like I wasn't good enough or that grades mattered that much. And that hasn't stopped me from being anxious most of my late middle school to highschool years. Nevertheless I've always been a good student up until college. For some reason I just don't get what i'm doing wrong, and that basically destroyed my self-esteem (which I've linked to how well I'm doing at school pretty much my whole life)... It is now reflecting on my relationship with my boyfriend, who is doing much better than I am in college, and we recently broke up because of how much I felt inferior to him. I've never stopped being told i'm a smart girl with a lot to offer, which ended up frustrating me even more because I'm still struggling with figuring out what is it that i'm not doing right to succeed again. This is why I think the negative atmosphere at home, strict parents and "conditional love" is kind of a simplistic explanation to go with. Or do you consider that being raped by a close member of the family counts as an example of that too, (which I have been as a child)? Hope that wasn't too hard to read lol i'm just looking for ways to improve on myself and maybe get back with my now ex boyfriend, or just be a better version of myself overall
Mayssem Mosbah - you have well challenged the intro-level Self-Actualization Humanist premise as presented here. It is possible to be open, have empathy, be positive in outlook and be generous, yet still have feelings of sadness, or tristesse, or sakura and so on. Self-actualization is not a promise of happy dopamine its more a pathway towards endorphic feelings of fulfillment despite set-backs and adversities. Considering the painful childhood revelation in your post, I would suggest if you could find a Gestalt Therapist might be very worthwhile for you all the same. There is some deep incongruence in having unconditionally loving parents and yet still find yourself the victim of family abuse.
Zen Den hi, thanks for your response! I’ve seen three therapists ever since the trauma and nothing really came out of it.
@@0590-q7r well I am sorry to hear that, although it can take until years later for the benefits to filter through into your emotional life. Best wishes to you.
Zen Den thank you so much, best of luck to you too :)
th-cam.com/video/4wkVIBrR0vY/w-d-xo.html
Self actualization is, when you are decisive over problems and your only basis to resolve it is your experience. You should'nt care what other people say, because you are no other's pet who acts only because of obedience to other.
Picking Elon Musk as an example of Self-Actualization aged like milk.
Self actualization is different for everyone which is pretty cool
Thank you for helping me understand this hard topic for the MCAT. I can finally say that I understand this topic. 🌸🌸
Egoism is the number 1 inhibitor of humility and kindness
It’s easy to spot!! All you have to do is pay attention to what irritates you in others. Let’s say you are involved with someone who doesn’t have much concept of time & you are right different. Like by the time they are in the car headed there. You are already otw back. It might be something you do not even realizing you are doing. These people are placed in your life to teach you a lesson. Sometimes several. Sometimes it takes longer than others. Some stay for a season. Some stay for several😶.
Very good video! It explains Maslow nicely. Thanks for posting it.
Elon Musk did not have a happy childhood full of love. That's why he spent his time reading books in his room. This goes against the methods psychologists use to make you a better person. Elon used his knowledge and his opportunities. Maybe we're too sensitive nowadays.
Maybe elon was too sensitive back then and realised the only way to not be like that, was to be someone like he is now.
@@adiyogi22 that sums up something more deep!☺
Many successful people comes from difficult childhood
Might Elon Musk be a little over concerned with the basic needs of resources? I fail to see how he's reached belonging, love, esteem, and self-actualization when he's so excessively concerned with the accumulation of wealth and with expanding the business.
KahL Sama Good well imagined possibility. But, what if he was never that sensitive, and that’s why some people of high IQ, and probably on the autistic spectrum do so well.
I suppose his knowledge and abilities are very marketable too.
Thanks for your illustration and making it easy to understand
I grew in a bad situatuon but had the qualities of being open to things etc
You always do a great job explaining these concepts. You're good my man, congratulations :)
SO helpful! Fantastic videos. Thank you
I enjoyed your very easily explained and understandable information...great job‼️
Not everyone has the need for self-actualization, but those who have it is showing it.
They are the people that get up early, is always studying, and always trying to become a better person
Ken Able please - tell me more
Ken Able would you say more people who get up earlier are more driven then people who do not?
@@dylongarrett4779 It may depend!Some people wake up earlier not cause their driven but are being forced by the system. Jobs to go to,to make a living!
@Ken Able I know that, just stating the fact that u can be forced by circumstances to be driven or waking early as he just stated. Waking up early doesn't necessarily mean that u have reached a point of self actualization.
OMG... love this video. It is interesting to read how we can apply this theory in our own lives and in therapy
wow, this is not quite how I see things... This is a very ‘Western’, and almost Business and almost academic presentation kind of approach of Self-actualisation, -where the notions of ‘success’ are mentioned so much… I think an actualising human-being will see ‘success’ as very relative; perhaps in how many people are helped or intrigued by something, more than how much money one can make for oneself; to be fair, the narrator does imply that it is philanthropic or Good deeds that really motivate or fulfil them…
But -for me, as for Rogers and Maslow, these truths are Self-evident or Intuitive… arising out of highly individualistic inner-venturing but are universally repeated in 0ther self-actualising individuals… The paradoxical truth that being true to my unique individuality is more or less inseperable from the Universe, what is ultimately most true of all indivuduals deep down…
For me, as Maslow seems to hone-in on in some of his writings, it is about this Universal Human-self or Beingness that we all are and all 'have' -though as this video rightly suggests, we are not all equally open to it partly down to upbringing but partly (something the video neglected, but is the Crucial factor for me) down to attitude… Moreover, A. Maslow & C. Rogers are at pains to state that it is not merely how one is loved or brought-up, although one would deduce that a healthy parenting will allow a more rounded-development of the character of the growing-child! (-always a good start!)
While I think this video completely over-does the role of control, this nevertheless picks up on the other important pre-requisite that I have just highlighted -our attitude: attitude, is like ‘spirit’ and is something that we can not only have some control over, but is crucially HOW we meet life’s challenges and values. So people needing to be themselves, their full Selves, to be truly + fully alive, over and above safety and conformity will very likely go towards it, make those choices and do those activities that help bring this about: I think anyone with such an attitude/set-of-values will at least taste it if not find it altogether -or for it to find them… I say the latter, for -like ‘Enlightenment’ (you mention that word, which usually means the pinnacle of Spiritual development, in the East at least), it is not something you can command, but if you have the right attitude, spirit, etc. it may find you, or it may not...
For I find one can only put oneself in the conditions of it, and these aren’t mechanical but more open, less certain… more ‘spiritual’, -about one’s attitude and qualities such as nobility, adventurousness/bravery - so, for instance, one who is very honest to themselves -who wants to see themselves as they are (In spite of the ‘ego’ in them just wanting to see what it wants - such a being needs to be aware of and honest to themselves about all these things!); who wants to be themselves above all - who, for some reason or rhyme, just cannot live a second-hand life of conformity/’normality’ but need to live from their living true ‘essence’ and being.
This may explain its relative rarity -people still today want to conform, and are just as conditioned (Maslow predicted 1% or less of the total population were anywhere near what could be considered ‘self-actualising’). I would qualify this as that it is still as rare as that in its pure form, but many more have tastes of it, perhaps due to this attitudinal way of seeing things seeping into (western)societies - anyone, not only artists, scientists, creative or originators, but anyone in more ‘menial’ occupations, can have a self-actualising attitude and approach to life, relationships, work, leisure and parenting… Indeed, from what I mentioned above, it is as if there is this Universal-Human-Beingness, this sane, free, evolved way of being that is self-evident and from this, for those who see and experience this, we can see that many human activities seems to come from it and express it at least partially…In this light maybe most of us, maybe nearly all of us participate in it without realising at some point, -when lost in musical creativity, creating something out of nothing, having an interesting interaction with our child, making love, some of our amazing dreams at night, etc. etc. The difference is this is more rare, haphazard, and may just be a good hour, etc. whereas for the individual more or less established in it, these things are a norm rather than the exception.
End of note one~~~Cont'd in note 2:
This was really well done.
Thank you so much! You are so good in explaining complex things
This was really helpful! Thank you! :)
Very well done video!❤
Wonderful video, and excellent channel! Wishing you continued success - it’s been fun watching your channel grow :-)
i loved this video! felt so connected
Based on this information, would attachment styles contribute to congruence vs incongruence as well as issues with identity?
Thank you. This is a great video, keep it up 💛💙
I loved your video, very informative and animated. It was a bit fast but great nonetheless.
I wish I knew how to make these informative animations.
Thank you so much 💓
Gestalt? Is that a english word I don't know or is it the german one for shape?
It's both, just with a newly defined meaning. Nothing unusual - thousands of terms have been adapted from English into other languages in the same way...
More... from me, to coninue...
Note 2:
It is not necessarily on the outside that one can recognise these sort of people, but from knowing them somehow from the inside… Even then, who’s to ‘say’? It is such an intuitive a factor, known by one’s subjective experiencing (but subjective in a healthy, whole sense) - unlike the ‘psychology’ of today which tries to be a ‘science’, but in my view, can NEVER EVER BE! How can something as amorphous or unfathomable as our psyches -as they are in actuality, be something that can be seen and grasped by science!? Real and proper science has to have such a tight handle on its variables, there is no way on earth this can happen! Maslow (more than Rogers) was ‘certain’ that his insights will be able to be scientifically-verified! I understand why he had this wish, -being in such an academic mileau - needing to impress his colleagues (-which, I think, was his only mistake -something he laboured in vain in his books... Alas, he could not see that he would never please his ‘scientific’ community unless hey already had a pre-existing intuition in this sort of stuff.
This is not to say that such an intuition cannot work along side-by-side with objective science very harmoniously!)
The thing about ‘self-actualisation’ is that there are no definite edges or solid boxes to tick least of all ‘scientifically’; it is much more subtle than that - and quite rightly so -as is anything truly valuable in life! The best things in life, Love, Beauty, etc. one can see, cannot be ‘objectified’ to another in any way, but are always experiences of the individual- even if we still sense intuitively that they ARE potentially universal!
Another feature -often neglected, seems to be those who have faced certain difficulties in themselves, challenges head-on -so much so that they have been transformed by it!… They seem to learn something that can never be taken away from them - something that is their OWN, and that is -in a way, deserved by their bravery and honesty and fidelity to the life inside them, amongst other things. Some too, may be forced to confront something so wholly and still get transformed, and this can be seen as their particular luck or fate (perhaps what happened to Eckhart Tolle!?) rather than because of their attitude and noble qualities!
These are the kind of attitudes and qualities such a human being has who then can stumble upon it, as I did, but I go in and out (-mainly out) of it, I am very grateful that it is something I know and can attest to, and will certainly Go Towards; and I can see and recognise it in another sometimes…As has been said, if we know ourselves really as we are, then we are not fooled by another, we can see where they’re at psychologically, for we have seen all these things in ourselves.
To be continued ~~~
I like your videos Theodore ☺
Thanks Sensei 🙏
Loving how u think, Maslow had something very important backwards.
How do you feel about your success?
I do what they do, stack chips like Hebrews.
Once I got my Marbles up,everything is better.
Money does buy happiness, in a way...
Elon Musk as a person to study. Sure you can study him but he is NOT an example of self-actualization. He is an example of being entitled, narcissistic, condescending, patronizing and a monster of his own making. He does not exemplify the qualities of generosity, compassion, and wanting to pay it forward to others.
That is not what Gestalt Therapy is about, nor does it have any correlation to the Humanistic Approach.
What is Gestalt Theraphy then? 😄
Best idea therapist use gestalt method where the therapist and patient are equal.
Great video with tons of value! Thanks for the upload
Basically the opposite of intersectionaliity
3rd
Only Awesome 👏😎
"gestalt" = /ɡəˈʃtɑːlt/ ('g' as in Goofy, 's' ("sh") as in Sade)
While we’re making corrections *shade.
Informative
I have seen Monkeys farming. So you do not need to be human to farm. I have seen Swine dining in 5-star restaurants. I have seen the killer cats plot and plan for selfish reasons. Being Human is to not be imitators, living of carnal desires, and to be selfless.
Well, although I am a Humanist, I would be careful with any science preceded by a world-view qualification, like humanist, feminist, Christian, Islamic, Arian, communist or whatever. I'm not aware of any case where id it not mislead the followers of these kinds of science in their job to see and describe the world how it is. How the world should as academic study is (entailed by) ethics. I'm really not sure, if Hitler and Stalin for example did not self-actualize very well.
What a man can be, he must be...
for the rest of his life
That elon musk comment aged like M I L K
Dear Sir, please assess and evaluate my Free 3 in 1 Personality Quiz in words, thanks! Wes PhD
Excellent, expect for “how much money would they make” & Elon Musk 🤦🏻♀️
Buddy said “smart monkey in a zoo “ 😂😂😂😂
Hey wassup theodore👍👍👍👍
The video is actually incorrect. Self actualisation is not enlightenment. Maslow's first 5 level theory was expanded upon to have 8 levels which included transcendance!
2d
I don’t understand where successful people fits into all of this because success if subjective I wouldn’t really define Ron musk successful he seems boring and weird. People convincing themselves they have self actualised are just lying to themselves more than anyone so they think they have answers, no one has answers everything is subjective and you change on the daily
Hold up. Elon Musk albeit, successful, is not healthy. He’s infamous for his childish tantrums and tacitly admits himself that he’s not healthy when he speaks on how his work ethic is extremely painful for him.
There is no such thing as conditional or unconditional love! There is only love!
in the simplest description/terms: we are probes.
First
Actually you left out transcendence, which is helping others to self actualize.
i miss the old background music :(
human still animal. yes more intelligent, also more greedy. nothing newly surprising. "moral, is an idea to self help at the end"..
Elon Musk is not healthy...
Info overload, you could have made four videos here
Watch Watch
probably would've been better to focus on person centred counselling instead of gestalt 🤣
So... the chakras.
It would to this page well if this video can be updated to remove the likeness of the black woman to portray the abusive parent. It is stereotypical and in poor taste as a psychological learning resource.
Agreed.
2
It all begins with knowing and accepting Jesus as your Lord and saviour.
Really? So you mean non--Christians don't have a chance at a fulfilled life?
@@placidh no.
@@uniquebeautiful4273 poor creatures! Don't you pity them?
Amen
BSENTREP is watching LMAO
👍👍👍👍
"someone like elon musk" immediately stopped watching
How things change. Elon Musk??? Definitely had us fooled.
eating pizza a day
Dribble.
I dont know my personality and your video dont help too
The Elon Musk example did not age well 😭
Will you take the mark or will you choose Christ? Jesus Christ is coming soon! Believe He is your Savior! He died for your sins.
Well, that elon musk comment didnt age well
Personality. Not for everyone
🤣🤣🤣
How many dislikes does this video have?
Theories are the opposite of science
djestalt
Humans ARE animals....
*The only purpose of the body is to carry the mind.*
I think you need to update this video. Clearly Elon Musk is neither an optimist or sane. 😬 Otherwise great job!