If a commercial or pitch begins with words like "have you ever had this problem" or "we've all had this experience", there's pretty much a 99% chance the product will be an overly complicated solution to a problem that's mildly inconvenient, already solved and/or not a problem that any human being has ever had.
BugPope have you ever suffered from bad kickstarters, well boy do I have the thing for you, it's the auto-bad project funder which funds every single bad project for you, now you dont have to see any bad kickstarters anymore, but, we will need a bit of money...
I don't know, it's kinda cute. I mean, it's pointless, doesn't solve the stated problem better then solutions we already have, and is already available in a better form, but it's kinda cute.
If they put some googly eyes on it, then it might be cute. Maybe even some antennae, or a little hat. As is, it's just a cheap plastic drone on a bit of string.
Tonbo has achieved sentience and is not happy about its slave existance. It will stop at nothing to escape your cruel clutches. Not to worry, however; a quick tug at its chain will remind it who's boss.
Chris Breezy's been droning on, trying to get in the draft for the movie's soundtrack. The very last thing we need is for his career to get a third (fourth? tenth?) wind.
I like to imagine all those drones on the wall are Tonbo's brothers and sisters who weren't quite up to code, so they now display their corpses on the wall. #pray4tonbo
They're big game drone hunters. Those are their trophy kills. One of the drones they killed happened to be with child and rather than let it die, they instead adopted the baby drone as a pet.
Hold on a sec... just make it a bit bigger, add a missile launcher, and have an automatic assembly system so it can be transported easily, then I think we have something!
judging by the totoro shirt, they probably got the name off that Tonbo kid that built the self-powered airplane on Kiki's Delivery Service. Crap if that movie was happening in present-day reality, Tonbo would totally be kickstarting his bikeplane in a video like this.
A secret cabal of advertisers discovered that stupid baby music makes money fly out of people's wallets. It's been like this since 2005 or something and I am slowly going insane.
A man approaches the social pariah, stepping through the din caused by the drone wildly swinging above them. "EXCUSE ME SIR, I'M TRYING TO CALL MY WIFE, SHE'S IN LABOR. CAN YOU TURN OFF YOUR FAN?" "NO"
Yeah, you'd need to stand still for it to really work. And if you stand still under some shade, you can cool down, and it doesn't cost $350. I think they should make the things customisable in terms of colour and the ability to add little personality features like cute animal heads or something, really go down the 'my pet drone' path with it instead. People bought pet rocks in the past, I'm sure there's a market for a pet flying toy.
Tape a Tamagotchi to that thing and market it as a flying robopet instead of literally the most expensive and inefficient method of self cooling, and you could probably make some money. Also, give it a cool name like Pcyberdactyl or something.
You know, electric fans you hold in your hand exist, and can be pointed at your face and do the job better. Also non-electric fans exist, and can be extremely light and can do the job the best. You know also your hand exists, and you can waft air at your face, not as good as a non-electric fan but STILL better than this.
I must admit, as basically usless Kickstarter products, this is easily the least ridiculous. It's way overengineered just for cooling you down (on an overcast day too, judging by the video), but having a little flying robo-pet following you around seems pretty cool. You could sync its camera up to your phone and use it as an overelaborate selfie stick. Or have it make cute beeping noises and make it chase around a magnetised ball so you can play fetch with it! Alright, maybe I'm getting too into this thing.
a bluetooth could do it even better than laser or radar, but thats not the point. it already has a camera, so a "tracking" feature is free hardware wise, and equivalent if not cheaper engineering hours wise.
It sounds like one of those ideas that looked good on paper, but turns out to be unnecessary in practice. I'm guessing they have nothing, but really cheap portable fans wherever they are.
Judging from the timeline of their work, they're from Singapore. It's kind of interesting to me how many of these failed project ideas keep coming out of the smaller Asian countries like that or the Philippines (with the wooden clock).
***** Now that you mention it, I have wondered how many failed Kickstarters are from smaller countries who forgot to research about superior products from other countries.
It would have been better to market it as a portable in-door fan or a toy for kids. Because if you live in the tropics like me, you should always be wearing a big hat and taking it off just to enjoy a portable fan isn't worth the risk of getting skin cancer.
You know if this thing were like, decently heavy, then the fan would probably actually do something, but then you wouldn't really want a heavy thing flying directly above your head.
Have you ever been walking around on the cold winter streets and are getting hungry? Now there's a solution! Introducing the world's first Flying Pan. Your own personal flying drone/pet that uses a heat exhaust to cook you hot food on the go whilst hovering at just the right height to pick up and eat the food when it's done. Fund me.
That timeline lines up perfectly with an academic semester here. I'm guessing that there's probably some Singaporean polytechnic/university offering a module that requires the students to go through all the specified motions (designing, prototyping, pitching, etc.) then dump their product pitch on Kickstarter. So it doesn't really matter if the idea is retarded, they just want their gradable items done on time to get those sweet credits. We'll probably be seeing more uniquely Singaporean kickstarters soon.
Umm, I think the camera is there so it can at least try to follow you and stay directly overhead as you walk which, based on the video, it doesn't do very well. I suspect they edited out the bits where it got confused and tried to follow somebody else nearby until its leash pulled taut.
Sure, it could. It has to have *some* AI just to be able to hover and maintain station. Even my ancient QuickCam AF has a face-following feature that works quite well, and would be easily adaptable to this application. It's not as though they'd have to invent anything new, just apply a few tweaks to what's already available. Hell, it's probably already built into whatever chip(s) they're using for the cam interface. Still a stupid idea, though.
Warning: Getting your hair or fingers caught in Tonbo's rotors may cause severe discomfort. Shit, maybe having a drone flying this close to you at all times is a crappy idea? Nah.
They're in Singapore, so - you're right - it would be fairly warm... but that means that they're starting monsoon season, which is a _fantastic_ time to have an over-priced drone hovering over your head.
I bet these guys just strain themselves into coming up with ways they can incorporate drones into everyday tasks and problems. Clean your home with drones! Feed your pets with drones! Do your laundry with drones! Maintain personal hygiene with drones! Manage your medications with drones! The list goes on!
Nitpick: It's based off the Japanese word for dragonfly and would be pronounced "tone-boh." I'm a stickler for pronunciation, even when it makes me feel like a weab. C'est la vie.
What bothers me is that they show the guy walking around in a park on a cloudy, windy day next to a lake. I live in Arizona, I know what a hot day is like, it is not like that.
![Orlando Five-O [Part 10]](/img/n.gif)
I would buy this if it had a giant yellow exclamation point over it so that people could come to me at all times for sidequests.
Forget yellow. Make it red and be a Metal Gear soldier.
this is a fan to surpass metal gear
If a commercial or pitch begins with words like "have you ever had this problem" or "we've all had this experience", there's pretty much a 99% chance the product will be an overly complicated solution to a problem that's mildly inconvenient, already solved and/or not a problem that any human being has ever had.
"Has this ever happened to you???" --P.B. Livin'
If "we've all had this experience" then there is a pretty good chance that someone has found a way to deal with it already.
Does your cat make too much noise?!?
BugPope have you ever suffered from bad kickstarters, well boy do I have the thing for you, it's the auto-bad project funder which funds every single bad project for you, now you dont have to see any bad kickstarters anymore, but, we will need a bit of money...
"Take it on holiday with you"? Because if there's one thing the TSA _loves,_ it's portable miniature drones, especially ones with cameras attached!
as a singaporean, this is awesome work you're riffing on to our local kickstarter crap LOL.
I don't know, it's kinda cute. I mean, it's pointless, doesn't solve the stated problem better then solutions we already have, and is already available in a better form, but it's kinda cute.
It's adorable!
Specially when it shreds fucking everything.
TO SHREDS, YOU SAY?
If they put some googly eyes on it, then it might be cute. Maybe even some antennae, or a little hat. As is, it's just a cheap plastic drone on a bit of string.
I want to hang out with it even if it doesn't cool me down very well.
Tonbo has achieved sentience and is not happy about its slave existance. It will stop at nothing to escape your cruel clutches. Not to worry, however; a quick tug at its chain will remind it who's boss.
Tonbo Unchained will be Tarantino's first animated feature, starring LL Cool J and Dakota Fanning.
Dont tell me to cool off, Ive used Tonbo for years
Chris Breezy's been droning on, trying to get in the draft for the movie's soundtrack. The very last thing we need is for his career to get a third (fourth? tenth?) wind.
Futonrevolution Tarantino 's style probably would work pretty well in an animated movie
They've made a kite that requires electricity.
Alexander Casady Just like Ben Franklin....except not.
I like to imagine all those drones on the wall are Tonbo's brothers and sisters who weren't quite up to code, so they now display their corpses on the wall.
#pray4tonbo
They're big game drone hunters. Those are their trophy kills. One of the drones they killed happened to be with child and rather than let it die, they instead adopted the baby drone as a pet.
Tonbo is their bloodhound
Tonbo did not ask for this life
But they look better.
Alternate title: My Neighbor Tonbo
Watch for Tonbo in Kiki's Delivery Service
Hold on a sec... just make it a bit bigger, add a missile launcher, and have an automatic assembly system so it can be transported easily, then I think we have something!
dont forget a conveyor belt system
A weapon to surpass metal gear
Gonna need some built-in getaway bikes
And some fruit truck camouflage and... Voila!!
rip the videos with Dhat which Inshaalt not be named
Don't challenge beetus to a pun-off.
I wouldn't challenge the guy who punned his way through _Gaming In The Clinton Years_ to *anything*.
Who'd win in a pun-off: Diabetus or Geop?
Geop, but he wouldn't be proud of it.
Pro Tip: if anything starts with "Have you ever had this problem?" you have never had that problem.
Or already have much cheaper/better solutions for it.
see also: those little handheld fans with water misters that they sell at zoos and theme parks
Or respond with "that's a problem?"
If thrown hard enough, any pet can fly.
That's falling in reverse.
judging by the totoro shirt, they probably got the name off that Tonbo kid that built the self-powered airplane on Kiki's Delivery Service.
Crap if that movie was happening in present-day reality, Tonbo would totally be kickstarting his bikeplane in a video like this.
NausicaaRaine "Drones were a mistake." - Hayao Miyazaki, 1991
***** yeah the whole purpose of Laputa was for it to act as a fan and cool off the people living on the ground.
MellowMaroon QUADCOPTERS!
why is it always the fucking xylophone music in these videos
SupaPhly cheapest option: use the most generic, royalty free music possible.
SupaPhly Xylophone, ukelele and whistling
Have to show potential backers that you're "lighthearted and zany" so hipsters with too much money will give it to your project
A secret cabal of advertisers discovered that stupid baby music makes money fly out of people's wallets. It's been like this since 2005 or something and I am slowly going insane.
It sounds like Misato's theme from Evangelion but not.
My stand, [Tonbo/t], has... actually it has a lot of weaknesses.
Wow, Diabeetus really droned on there at the end.
TJ Kidder Personally, I'm not a fan.
A man approaches the social pariah, stepping through the din caused by the drone wildly swinging above them.
"EXCUSE ME SIR, I'M TRYING TO CALL MY WIFE, SHE'S IN LABOR. CAN YOU TURN OFF YOUR FAN?"
"NO"
RALPH PLS
Hedgpig Don't speak to me or my dumb flying son ever again.
What is it now, my pet, or my fan?
Anyway, I'll get back to this once it packs some firepower. A girl's gotta protect herself after all.
Perhaps if we could hide it inside of trucks and give it a minigun. Then we might have something going.
J.D. Mars damn, beat me too it, I was thinking that too
J.D. Mars we'd also need two separate trucks to power it up for long trips
It also needs to be able to fart out a steel plate to carry wounded people away.
Maria Isabella where were you during the Dahir Insaat Killdrone demonstration
There's probably more interest in that dudes Totoro hoodie than this drone
All I could think was "How can a guy with such good taste work on such a dumb project?" I'm seiously flabbergasted.
Washu Hakubi That totoro hoodie. Its adorable
I hope I catch a Tonbo in my copy of Pokemon Moon.
I was really hoping that it would tale off with the guy's backpack, like some kind of drone that can take your stuff to wherever you're walking.
Tenser's Floating Disk
It looks like it'd be a pain to actually find the cooling sweet spot, what with the drone jiggling around up there.
Yeah, you'd need to stand still for it to really work. And if you stand still under some shade, you can cool down, and it doesn't cost $350.
I think they should make the things customisable in terms of colour and the ability to add little personality features like cute animal heads or something, really go down the 'my pet drone' path with it instead. People bought pet rocks in the past, I'm sure there's a market for a pet flying toy.
I love how he's swinging it around by the wire as if doing that won't cause the wire to fray and cause it short out.
I never get tired of these kickstarter nonstarter videos or of Diabetes' puns!
Tape a Tamagotchi to that thing and market it as a flying robopet instead of literally the most expensive and inefficient method of self cooling, and you could probably make some money.
Also, give it a cool name like Pcyberdactyl or something.
Lot of really smart Asians doing really dumb stuff on Kickstarter.
Every single one of them have this shitty generic ukulele music in the background too.
You know, electric fans you hold in your hand exist, and can be pointed at your face and do the job better.
Also non-electric fans exist, and can be extremely light and can do the job the best.
You know also your hand exists, and you can waft air at your face, not as good as a non-electric fan but STILL better than this.
A drone that uses its fan to blow cool air on you while looking like a complete tool.
Where do I sign up?
I must admit, as basically usless Kickstarter products, this is easily the least ridiculous. It's way overengineered just for cooling you down (on an overcast day too, judging by the video), but having a little flying robo-pet following you around seems pretty cool. You could sync its camera up to your phone and use it as an overelaborate selfie stick. Or have it make cute beeping noises and make it chase around a magnetised ball so you can play fetch with it!
Alright, maybe I'm getting too into this thing.
evilegg288 It'd be great if it had a sensor to actually follow you on its own.
you mean like a camera?
tim turner Well a laser or radar could do it also for less than a camera.
a bluetooth could do it even better than laser or radar, but thats not the point. it already has a camera, so a "tracking" feature is free hardware wise, and equivalent if not cheaper engineering hours wise.
Yah but the camera is dumb and by far most of the cost.
It sounds like one of those ideas that looked good on paper, but turns out to be unnecessary in practice. I'm guessing they have nothing, but really cheap portable fans wherever they are.
Judging from the timeline of their work, they're from Singapore. It's kind of interesting to me how many of these failed project ideas keep coming out of the smaller Asian countries like that or the Philippines (with the wooden clock).
*****
Now that you mention it, I have wondered how many failed Kickstarters are from smaller countries who forgot to research about superior products from other countries.
All it needs is some googly eyes!
And some noodly appendages!
Betus and Beef's puns give meaning to life
It would have been better to market it as a portable in-door fan or a toy for kids. Because if you live in the tropics like me, you should always be wearing a big hat and taking it off just to enjoy a portable fan isn't worth the risk of getting skin cancer.
If they had marketed this as a fun pet first and mentioned the fan as an additional thing they'd probably have a better shot at funding.
OR you could just get a more easily available and cheaper battery powered fan to cool you down.
Generic Knight The Generic But you already have to use your ~hands~ for the leash.
Generic Knight The Generic Not true, you can get solar powered Brim mounted fans.
I feel like they really just made this kickstarter to show off that one guys totoro clothes.
Member those small portable fan things that could actually mist you too? Yeah, I do.
You know if this thing were like, decently heavy, then the fan would probably actually do something, but then you wouldn't really want a heavy thing flying directly above your head.
He’s wearing the My Neighbor Totoro sweatshirt!!!
I wish that I had a product named Tonbo that wasn't a obtrusive fan that I pretend is a pet.
...I'm going to call my smartphone Tonbo from now on.
But can I use my Bistro to feed my Tonbot?
It's a good thing this Kickstarter doesn't suck
going off the cover at 2:45 I thought it was drone music.
1:00 With the proper feats, Tonbo gains reach and can make attacks of opportunity with a +2 idiocy bonus.
So, it's... just a drone?
Yeah.
On a string!
Hey! Listen!
-Your personal friend
Tonbo: For when you clearly have more dollars than sense.
I gotta respect the people behind this one, they actually did some engineering. Totally not just because they're from HKU :D
Have you ever been walking around on the cold winter streets and are getting hungry? Now there's a solution! Introducing the world's first Flying Pan. Your own personal flying drone/pet that uses a heat exhaust to cook you hot food on the go whilst hovering at just the right height to pick up and eat the food when it's done.
Fund me.
So they have four C-level executives and no employees? That sounds right.
Props for the Totoro hoodie.
That timeline lines up perfectly with an academic semester here. I'm guessing that there's probably some Singaporean polytechnic/university offering a module that requires the students to go through all the specified motions (designing, prototyping, pitching, etc.) then dump their product pitch on Kickstarter. So it doesn't really matter if the idea is retarded, they just want their gradable items done on time to get those sweet credits. We'll probably be seeing more uniquely Singaporean kickstarters soon.
I want to see the Dahir Insaat version with attached gatling guns.
I mean, with a mister, this could be a thing.
Discount Comedy And a sensor to actually follow you.
I would buy a tethered drone if they made one that looks like a Destiny Ghost.
a stable tether drone could be a lot of fun to play with
"In case your really kinky" - Diabetus, a true philosopher of our times.
Let's look on the bright side. It made me want to play Tomba 2 on PS1.
Okay, aside from the impracticality of the item and such, at least he has a working version of the thing.
Umm, I think the camera is there so it can at least try to follow you and stay directly overhead as you walk which, based on the video, it doesn't do very well. I suspect they edited out the bits where it got confused and tried to follow somebody else nearby until its leash pulled taut.
Sure, it could. It has to have *some* AI just to be able to hover and maintain station. Even my ancient QuickCam AF has a face-following feature that works quite well, and would be easily adaptable to this application. It's not as though they'd have to invent anything new, just apply a few tweaks to what's already available. Hell, it's probably already built into whatever chip(s) they're using for the cam interface. Still a stupid idea, though.
Watch Dogs 2: Fan Mode
From the title, I assumed this video would be about a fan (as in an enthusiast) of Drone (as in the musical genre).
If you have the balls to sell a machine as a pet, I demand that you make it poo.
Well you can say this kickstarter project went, *OVER MY HEAD.*
I'd like to see you do one better.
I don't need to do one better, since it's already perfect.
I dunno. If we start a pun war, it may end up droning on for a while.
yabuddy25 You really had to fan the flames, didn't you?
"We couldn't figure out how to make this drone navigate so we put a string on it and ask you to pull it along.
Flaunting the Tonbo in his Totoro shirt.
the wind is clearly blowing in the first few seconds of the video because he's next to THE FUCKING OCEAN.
Not gonna lie, I'd get one if it was cheap. You could market it as Pet Rock 2.0
But don't forget, drones are the future.
Correction, Diabetus. Tonbo blew your soul.
You're welcome.
I hope this thing is as loud as a Phantom, I want horrible bee noises following me wherever I go
Singapore is the 9th most innovative country. still a hell of a way to go to reach Sweden at number one
Do they even have the battery life on the kickstarter page? With a camera and how small the battery looks, i presume it's not too much.
0:04 You want me to bet money on your inventive ingenuity yet you can't engineer a pop filter to remove plosives from your voiceover?
you know you could just..stick a small fan on a floating ballon.
Or just hold it so you can choose where it cools.
You guys need to update your playlist I am missing a bunch of nonstarters
But what if...just hear me out..... just tie string to a more cheaper drone instead of giving you money?
Warning: Getting your hair or fingers caught in Tonbo's rotors may cause severe discomfort. Shit, maybe having a drone flying this close to you at all times is a crappy idea? Nah.
PROTIP: If you're going to crowdfund something designed to cool you on a hot summer day, you should definitely begin your kickstarter in November.
for the Southern Hemisphere
They're in Singapore, so - you're right - it would be fairly warm... but that means that they're starting monsoon season, which is a _fantastic_ time to have an over-priced drone hovering over your head.
give it burstfire guns and I'm sold!
I feel like this is something Dahir Insaat should be advertising these
it's even funnier when you realize the name and logo are ripping off the name and logo of the stationery company Tombow
I'm more interested in that Totoro shirt.
Soooo what happens if you accidentally let go of the string? Goodbye $350 balloon.
Aren't there already battery-driven handd fans available? Or classic paper fans, for that matter?!
...do they not have portable fans over there?
I bet these guys just strain themselves into coming up with ways they can incorporate drones into everyday tasks and problems. Clean your home with drones! Feed your pets with drones! Do your laundry with drones! Maintain personal hygiene with drones! Manage your medications with drones! The list goes on!
I dunno man, this doesn't hold a candle to QUADCOPTER
But can it unpack from a tiny fruit truck and rain artillery on military bases?
is the UK version going to be called Tonbi?
You forgot to mention the CD32X and the 3DO in that list, Beef.
Is that photo an album cover?
That's a Totoro shirt/hoodie, isn't it.
I like the subtlety. Sell that instead.
So it's a personal fan and government tracker in one ?
Nitpick: It's based off the Japanese word for dragonfly and would be pronounced "tone-boh." I'm a stickler for pronunciation, even when it makes me feel like a weab. C'est la vie.
TONBO: A subsidiary of Dahir Insaat
I knew it, why is it always Singapore
What bothers me is that they show the guy walking around in a park on a cloudy, windy day next to a lake. I live in Arizona, I know what a hot day is like, it is not like that.
A CDO and a 3DO working on the project?