Great video Mayuko! Very well articulated! Your self reflection is what a lot of people need to do (or will do at some point) in their lives. There's nothing wrong w/ being a Yappie and achieving milestones... but "Now what?". What will you do once you've gotten there? Props to you for being a software engineer.. but ALSO starting a YT channel! You are SO not a typical yappie, so give yourself more credit. Keep it up, hope to meet someday. -phil (UCSD pride)
I love the reflection. It's the absence of a safety net for immigrants that makes high percentage (safe) decisions compelling. As a group increases in size, then the safety to branch out into low percentage, high pay-off life options becomes greater. Think about it: if there's 10 people, the number of risk takers will be virtually 0 because the normal distribution suggests 95% will take the safe route. 0.5% will be super geniuses or super dopey and the balance will be a bit over or under. But as the numbers increase, those percentages might remain the same but meaningful clusters and echo chambers will have the opportunisty to form, explore and eventually translate to visible actions and role models. Thats theory anyway. Phil W, you're an inspiration and your social justice message in yappie is amazing and overdue. I like to think your pioneering work is like the Oprah for under represented minorities!
Wong Fu Productions I first totally agreed with the Yappie concept. While watching this video, I realize that it's not a Yappie thing, but in general a question/struggle for many young professionals, not necessarily Asians, but anyone possible. It's just whether this person raises this question to themselves. I am Chinese, born and raised in China, moved to Europe before 20 and am now over 30. I had this struggle too and I talked to friends in similar life phase. The difference I noticed between my international friends and local friends are that the people with international background do think more on this issue and I would say it's because they know there is other opportunities/possibilities because of their multicultural backgrounds. The majority of local friends have less struggles on it, because becoming young professionals is the (only) way they know and how it works with most people. Honestly, the majority people choose to "be safe" and they construct the functional society. So, I do think it's great to reflect on it, but we can also see it from a more positive perspective. It's because of our international backgrounds, we are given more perspectives, more opportunities to reflect. People who are able to and are determined enough to decide for a new way are still the minority in almost every society. It's great to raise question about it, but I do think we don't have to categorize it to a unique "Asian" issue. I am not sure if I am making my point clear enough. Just my thoughts while watching this video. Probably because there is no real Chinese minority group where I am living, I am not categorizing myself to a certain group with immigration background (there is no single China town in any sense in this country). And the situation you are facing in the US must be totally different. Maybe that's why you are promoting this awareness to Asian groups.
That’s true about the name yappie but the ... idea to get something that is stable is something I been set to achieve. I’m a yappie as well right now, but like I want more. Something that provides more purpose or something that goes beyond what I should be able to achieve.
Mayuko, don't worry about the haters. Being a "yappie" is perfectly ok. Financial security now will give you the freedom to impact the world in a much bigger way. I can't understand the people who go to college and study something outside of STEM and then look down on those who do and say they are not cool or something like that. Ignore the haters.
jarji de unless you are going to fetch your own water, grow your own food and build your own shelter. Until then financial security's paramount to survival. Even beggars rely on the generosity of those more financially stable than they are. So it's pretty real actually.
That's like saying health is an illusion because you might get hit by a car and lose your legs and therefore keeping fit and healthy isn't important. Financial security is absolutely a real thing and more often than not, it is a positive influence.
It's interesting you say that people who study things outside of STEM look down on those who do because as somebody who did study something outside of STEM, I found my experience to be the complete opposite. Luckily my non-STEM studies was something that prepared me to be a lawyer. I work in public interest so I feel like I am doing work to help people who would not otherwise receive help, but we talk about self-care and making sure you yourself are taken care of first. You can't fully help other people if your life is too unstable.
I love how you ended this video and just connected it all together. I'm a new software engineer in LA just trying to find my way and your videos have really helped. Thanks :)
I can relate to this SOOO SO much! I'm a high school junior and all the decisions I make in life are based off of my fears, too. I've decided to become a software engineer but only because I took a summer Comp Sci course and I kinda liked it, but mostly the job is well-paid. I've never really liked science or math, but rather I've always gravitated toward art and music and language, and yet I don't WANT to study liberal arts... uughh
Yes, there are benefits being a “Yappie” but investing, let your money make more money and learning to take risks gives a more long term security and income.
I'm a yappie. or i was. And then I decided to quit my job and move to another country to reconnect with my culture (Taiwan), study ecology and try to make a difference in the world. Do I still worry about family, stability, and money? yeah. i do, every day. But i feel like i'm making progress and slowly changing myself into someone that can be remembered for contributing to the world somehow. For the last year, I've been thinking about how to make a difference. And I like your message and your method. It might just be the push i need to start a new channel and maybe start making videos.
I have the exact same thoughts! I know my parents and grandparents made so many sacrifices so that their children could get educated, and live a comfortable life. So it’s hard to balance making decisions based of fear of letting them down vs making decisions for myself and what I really want.
I've tried to follow the same path as being a Yappie except my plan kinda fell apart. I did everything, study hard, go to a good college. I was studying CS but started to struggle so I switched to an easier, more useless major and graduated. I'm still trying to land a decent software engineering job, but I'm just not qualified right now. I'm in a weird situation of not being good enough to be a Yappie, and not passionate about anything else enough to deviate from being a Yappie. So lost
Oh man, thanks for sharing your story - it’s important to me that I hear these slightly different stories about a different perspective. Hope everything works out, wishing you the best 💖
I think Wong fu is playing up yappie to generate views. I would not want any labels on Asians. Did you read the report of pew research about the ethnic segment with the with widest disparity in income - Asians. So I am totally against the propagation of yappie in these videos. It’s too elitist a mindset that discriminates other Asians who may not be doing good as them and cause depression. At one point in time a report states that the most depressed Asians in the US are the Asian males in the US, especially transplants. Yappie is putting pressure on other Asians who don’t have it as good as mayuko. I wished even these yappies stop with the labeling. It’s not healthy. Even yuppie back in the day was considered a put down. If I recall correctly, the book American psycho also used it to mock the character in the book. Using yappie can bite you back in the a...
Actually, I'm just like you. I dropped out of CS because I was struggling, graduated in a non-CS major. Did Real Estate for a while. Got very bored of it. Started to study CS again. But this time it was not in school. I think I didn't like all the theory in my college classes. I wanted application. This time, I'm much more committed to my learning and I've gotten further than I've ever gone before. But also programming is what I picked for myself, not anyone else. CS/Programming is very knowledge based. You can't do what you don't know. It's also very vast. Find a field in CS that you are passionate about and learn everything about it. Once you know enough, the obstacles will no longer be obstacles.
I kind of went through a similar situation in school but really turned it around. I was in pure Math - Acturual science. Didn't even know what it really was but was told if you're smart and good with math you should do this. Turns out you need to have 0 personality to do that as a career and it's prob the safest of safe yappie careers. I switched to econ and graduated with an "easier and less useful" major and realized with an undergrad alone there's no real job. So I hustled super hard the year before graduation and talked to over 80 ppl in different consulting firms to land a job. That hustling have followed me since and I've always tried to talk to ppl through informational chats first to land the job. I find many Asians are shy to do this, shy to reach out to strangers. If you do it in a humble and respectful way that also show you're more hungry than other candidates, you can break in. Over the years I've managed to land jobs at McKinsey, Deloitte, Facebook, google, Uber, VC funds through this and have seen other friends from Arts majors that self taught engineering eventually end up at Google and FB. Hang in there and keep on hustling!
I think that this "yappie"/"yi(2)ppie" (Young Immigrant/2nd Generation Immigrant Professional) approach to living is quite pleasant if you position yourself in a stable job that you actually enjoy. The financial stability and resulting mental stability that these kinds of jobs provide form a strong foundation for a happy life. As a person who quit a financially and mentally rewarding management consulting job in North America to start a business in Japan well outside of my area of expertise and in my second language to try something new, I often contemplate where I'm sitting in life from the opposite side of the mirror as you, Mayuko, and I wonder if I made the right decision to step through the glass. Jumping into the unknown is as scary as it is rewarding... except it may not necessarily be rewarding (speaking in terms of financial gain)! And honestly, I think it took making the jump to make me see the value in the yappie/yi(2)ppie lifestyle. Many of my friends have reaped the rewards of their parents' hard work (whether they were low income / start-from-scratch immigrants or born domestically in a low income bracket), and are now living comfortable lives that I envy in many ways. The benefits of my current position are autonomy, the satisfaction associated with making clearly visible impacts on the community and receiving recognition for it, and the influx of new skills I've acquired. The downsides are sole culpability for my failures, ongoing anxiety around growing and maintaining the business, and wondering if what I'm doing is sustainable or even desirable from a lifestyle perspective in the long run. Oh, and crappy paperwork. I think that which lifestyle is better for you really depends on your personality, but I also think that is an excellent idea to take a swing at more than one so that you know what's out there and can see from experience which road is optimal for you. You can always cut across the hedge back to the road you came from if what you see doesn't tickle your fancy. Whichever road we choose, we can make a big impact on the people around us by taking pleasure in the process of getting to our milestones and using that positive energy to work hard and give something back to everyone. Good luck with your thinking! Maybe I'll see you back on that side of the mirror one of these days to pick up even more kinds of wonderful human experiences. Charles
i had a similar experience as yours, and now i realize so much of it was rebelling against success and self sabotage. it is a weird thing humans do to themselves. lessons learned though. this is why i don't buy into the whole "asians only chase academic/financial succcess" thing. i feel like most of it is just jealous members of society trying to through us off track mentally, like to hate ourselves or something. who isn't chasing success? if we do it through academics that is because it is a merit-based system. there is plenty of racial prejudice (ie bamboo ceiling) in other areas. it's great other asians branch out into acting, music, etc, but to do it because somebody says you are otherwise a 'typical yappie' is plain toxic and being manipulated.
Well the 9-5 careerist life in a world of capitalism is pretty isolating and soul sucking tbh. Your feelings are natural, wanting to be more socially driven and motivated to do more human enrinching things that dont have to do with money & bills is natural. Now to what extent you puruse these ideas is up to you but i do hope you find what moves you
I wanted to strive to be a Computer Scientist in university just because I thought that it was the most practical job to benefit the society. I already had intense music roots and came from a very musical background and wanted to be a DJ since middle school. I am 21 years old now and I just dropped out of university and started to realize that deep inside my purpose was to create and mix music for people making them feel good their special days. I am striving to start my own business with my TH-cam channel here to help people with overcoming hormonal acne (random) and DJ business. I can only be really good at something that I am truly passionate about!! I am going to start producing music as well.
Sonia Anastasia Good for you! Taking risks is what leads to growth. We’ve been conditioned and programmed to play it safe. There are days that I wonder if working 9-5 is all there is to it.
I'm struggling with this exact problem, and I resonate so much with this video. A lot of the tangible things are easy once I just wait it out or keep working in tech. However the intangible things just stress me out because I REALLY want to do them (your list is literally a great one haha) but I have no idea how I can achieve them. This emotion kind of increased since I've started TH-cam but in tandem it's also opened up a lot of doors I've never realized. Thanks Mayuko for sharing your thoughts. This put things in words I never imagined.
Nothing wrong with being afraid or cautious in life. It's the Asian thing to do. You can take risks and still be cautious, but instead of taking risks in career, maybe take risks in activities, go out and do more random stuff. I'm proud to be a Yappie 👍 well, not the 'P' part yet, just a fresh grad.
Great video and wonderful insights! Taking risks is what leads to growth and discovering what you truly love and are meant to do. We’ve been conditioned and programmed to play it safe. There are days that I wonder if working 9-5 is all there is to it.
As a millennial with an immigrant background who studied engineering, I can really relate to the thoughts of "Am I playing it too safe?" The way I see it, it is my goal to provide the future generations of family with the financial foundation to attempt audacious, risky goals knowing that they have the financial safety net if it doesn't work out.
I’m probably in the minority here, but it seems like you’re looking for a solution to a problem that isn’t clearly defined. It’s as if you’re being challenged by someone else’s metric of a successful life which is hyped personal and subjective.
Hello Mayuko, I really liked your video and your way of seeing things. In my case I am living something similar to yours, in the sense that I have not yet graduated from university, but I already have a stable job. The truth is that at times it scares me to think about my future, to see myself as I am right now, only older. I have that small and great feeling at the same time to leave everything, make a business of my own and grow up and explore more of this life. Anyway, I just want you to know that your videos make me feel relieved, I think that all of us who watch your channel feel very comfortable and accompanied when we see you and hear you talk about life. I think we should all do it from time to time. Sorry for my English, it's not my native language, I'm from Guatemala and I speak Spanish, but I hope you have understood me. Greetings mayuko, now you know that you also have a fan in Guatemala :)
I feel like I would be considered the white version of a yappie. Live my life to reach certain goals only to feel like I've wasted time for many of them. Its only now that I've started to self analyze myself more. Recently I made it through my first year of college. After seeing so much complacency and laziness of other students along with a boring and repetitive internship this summer, I've come to realize that I want more from life. I want a challenge and I want to feel like I'm making a difference. Only time will tell if I will be able to achieve something meaningful to me.
You either do it or you don't. Ignore what your fellow students are doing. They are a poor metric for comparison since most people are mediocre and will not achieve anything substantial. The best time to start realizing your goals is now. Join a lab or get involved in some programming projects. Do something that will help you grow as an individual and develop a useful skillset.
Computer hardware engineering student here. While getting my bachelors of science is important, what will happen afterward in terms of what jobs I will do is still very unsure and unknown. In order to help this, I am pursuing several internships. It is indeed scary to confront the unknown, however with the support of my family it is better. Your message of taking the safe route is very respectable. All of these people who are disillusioned into thinking they can make it on youtube or twitch need to watch this video. Keep up the good work.
This is an excellent video. Thank you for so much for your contribution. I think it is important to have a good balance because if you don't you could end up living the rest of your life in a bubble and regretting never venturing outside of that little bubble. You could end up Walling yourself off into a very small space just because you're playing it safe. On the other hand, if you spend your entire life venturing to different places and things, when the time comes that you cannot venture anymore, you will not have anything to fall back on and then you'll be screwed. It's all about the balance.
FUTURE LIFE PLANS PLAN A: Complete Plan B until Plan A is ready. Plan A is to do what ever I want in the future. PLAN B: Become Computer Software Hardware Engineer as back up plan If Plan A fails. PLAN C: If plan A and B fail, create Plan D PLAN D: [ unknown] PLAN E: If plan D fails... good luck future me Note: Future me, if you somehow manage to f*ck up Plan A-E, what the hell are you doing. Get your life together and create plan F-Z. Also, future me, if you don’t take that trip to Japan before your thirties.... you know the consequences
That soft shark pillow is what life's about. Also, I am so proud of a fellow Triton opening up about their life story. I went the medical school route after graduating from UCSD in 2015 and am now a third year. Thinking back though, it certainly seemed that my whole life was about min-maxing outcomes and following the "statistically best" path to reach wealth and success. It wasn't exactly a comfortable ride getting here, BUT I can confidently say it was still cushy relative to what my peers went through. I feel overly privileged, but at the same time entitled since 100% of my academic success was forged brick by brick with my own hands. Like Fung Bros said in their Yappie video, growing up in a nice box has its perks, but also immeasurable constraints.
Great video! It is very interesting how different cultures see success and self-realization in different ways. I am a mexican (living in México) CS student and I feel that, my goal is to master the skills to make it to Silicon Valley. It is hard, because in mexican culture, family is a really strong concept so it is hard to stay away from them, but If that means that I will be able to work in a meaningful and technical-challenging work, then I will do it.
IMO, you're just being responsible. The people who go out, take risks, and become influential almost always come from a wealthy family, and thus they have something to fall back on if things don't pan out. (I imagine that they usually don't, but wealthy individuals have huge networks that allow for greater success rates compared to attempts made by the less affluent). Look up any hugely influential person, and you will see the pattern. It sucks for the rest of us normal people, but that's life. Note however that you don't need to make an impact when you're young. Take care of yourself now, build up a safety net, then go out and do your thing. (This is my plan at least.)
I'm a Yappie too in the software industry and have had similar thoughts. I used to think once I made $100k a year it would be "enough" and I'd be satisfied with my success. Well, I made it there in a hurry and realized nothing special happened. I was still the same old me. So I set the bar higher, $200k. The past two years I've reached $450k in annual income from my job, and at 30 years old I feel like nothing revolutionary has occurred in my life over the past decade. Sure, I can live in a slightly better neighborhood, afford more vacations, drive a better car, and the numbers on my financial statements grow larger. But lifestyle-wise I'm not making the kind of dough that is really life-changing. Then I realized the folks with true wealth ($1+ million in income per year with $25+ million net worth minimum) are NOT the ones working for someone else. To reach that point you gotta go out and do your own thing, which entails massive amounts of the exact thing that I've been underexposed to most of my life, and that you've mentioned in your video -- RISK. For now I'll keep collecting a comfy and fat paycheck but like you, there's always an anxiety that I'm wasting away years that I could be using to build true wealth...
But then again... what will you really gain (aside from money of course) by making $1 million+ per year and building "true wealth?" You can probably move to an even better neighborhood, take a few more vacations, drive multiple luxury cars, etc... but what else? Are you happy at your current job? Do you have other passion you wish to pursue? What kind of "lifestyle" are you looking for?
your not much of a yappie when you have a youtube channel this large and create content. or at least in my opinion. Yappie's are pretty unoriginal and don't take risks like putting themselves out there like being a youtuber. Idk if that made sense but hopefully that sinks in.
Thank you for this! You touched on many important concepts I have been thinking and learned about for the past few months as a student. Also, Wong-Fu rocks! You should also take a look at Gary Vaynerchuck's YT channel as well (beyond the motivational side).
Asian culture do tend to focus on financial security but tons of jobs that's financially secure don't really impact the world in a positive way. I have Asian friends working as accountants, working some kind of engineer, and I hear how they're working only for the salary. I'm Chinese Canadian and I didn't pursue that path, I went for a job in health care and I don't see my job for its salary, but for its potential to help people. I think that's what most people should strive for - you can be an engineer, you can be an accountant, but ideally you want to put that in good use, to be making a "positive impact" for others. And you can. You can work for some kind of non-profit organization or an organization that's developing software that has a positive impact somewhere. If your current job isn't giving you that, you might want to pursue another company. I'm sure after a few years of experience switching jobs shouldn't be too challenging.
The dog keeled over from all the heavy, yappie talk... Great thoughts there Mayuko! It’s important to question these things and where you are heading. I do so myself but never come up with great or original answers 🤔
i am sO glad i found your channel and you ! you basically explained everything im feeling so articulately! to see an asian woman who's out of college who already finished the path im currently on is so comforting and makes me so happy to know that this is a normal internal conflict to feel holy shit i am INSPIRED
Woah, you just said the EXACT same things I've been thinking about lately in terms of what I want out of life. Nice to hear it from another person/perspective.
Kudos to you for finding a new passion in youtube and following it. I am still a hardcore yappie, engineering software with a straight face all day, just because it pays well. Someday I hope to break out too...
This is a great video. I love how transparent you are about your life and I totally understand where you are coming from and I am super excited for your next video! And your back drop is fire!!
Yappie, kind of a weird concept for me, mixing racial identity with other characteristics, but in general it probably makes sense, btw those intangible goals, I feel like for most people everything revolves around them, be it that they're trying hard to understand and follow them or be it that they're ignoring them to pursue the tangible ones, but at the end of the day intangible goals are the most important, they can change you and fill your life. Having said that I wouldn't worry to much about understanding them, this kind of things usually happen on awhim, one day you wake up and ask your friends "have you ever thought about crossing the US by car and get to know all kinds of people in the meantime?" and a month later you do it, it's more about allowing yourself to risk it and do it rather than thinking about what to do (I'm immansily tired right now, this comment might make no sense, sorry)
Excellent and very relatable video, loved it! I think the challenge is really trying to find that balance between a good working and paying job and a meaningful impactful life.
Damn, I relate to this vid so well. I'm only in high school, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to end up taking the same path as a yappie. I don't think I could really see myself doing anything else though. For me, I think one of the reasons why computer science appealed to me so much was because of it's broad range of influence. Since you can create software for pretty much anything and/or anyone, it feels like it'll never be too late to have some sort of impact. But I think I'm definitely still in the process to find myself, and maybe then I'll find something worth taking a risk for. But for now, I think being a yappie is perfectly fine. Being stable has a lot of power to it, and sometimes that can be your pathway towards doing what you love, or putting you in a position where you can take risks.
Love the ending so much! TIL. Just knowing the terms 'Yappie' from this video. Unfortunately, I'm really risking myself at building a startup and set my college aside on my last year of college :'( Wish me luck! #NotAYappieTeam
How many of those goals are actually other people's goals being projected onto you via social media, TH-cam, etc.? I think it would be quite easy to draw the line between indecisiveness, feeling of inadequacy, and unhappiness with the idea that those aren't your dreams they are someone else's. I'm convinced, at it may be just me, that if what you actually want lines up with what you do these things are minimized. Also, I have been around the world a few times and I have experienced far more than I ever expected. Even working in the shittiest conditions possible with factory workers in China and seeing the reality of life in many places. Tourist stuff can't get you that. This has almost all been thanks to my job where I travel (software engineer as well btw) plenty. Is it safe of me to do this? Is it not chasing my intangibles and checking things off my list? I just happened to find something that was safe and lined up with what I wanted to do in my 20's. It also keeps me financially secure. Trust me, everything is better when you are financially secure. You can do things that other people can't and not have to worry. People who downplay this are just lying. Case in point, don't do things for the sake of them or because other people say you should. The meaningfulness will be diminished. It's like going to Thailand and only going to tourist places. You did what people told you to, but you didn't experience anything you couldn't have in America besides a much longer flight. Do what you want and if that is playing safe and being financially secure, all the more power to you. You are a rarity in that case and have nothing to be ashamed of.
My advice is: be careful what you wish for. It might just come true. The things you mention you want to do is actually very easy to achieve. Want to cry about a thing you didn't know you can cry about? Want to experience a wide range of human emotions? Want to get to know new people, new culture, etc? MOVE TO AFGHANISTAN.
You summed up many of my thoughts, I’m subscribing. SAFE not a bad thing but I’m slowly increasing my risk evaluation in order to achieve “more” in my life. I suffered disillusionment as an ABC, had identity crisis, had a existential crisis in middle school. Risk adverse (fear) foster stagnation and reward challenge.
"when you have a milestone and not a mission, you're lost when you achieve it" - TRUTH! This is exactly what I've been struggling with the last few years. Going from failing grades in elementary school (actually failing, not Asian fail) to top student by the end of highschool and getting into a top University, I thought all my problems would be answered. They were not. I was lost and had no sense of purpose because my whole life I've been told to get into a top school, I'm there and I had no idea what's next and completely messed up my first 2 years of undergrad. Then by the time I graduated I worked my grades up and hustled into a career in management consulting. I thought I'd be happy hitting that milestone but I was more sad than ever because consulting was just another way for me to delay commitment to a career. Fast forward 4 years, I did my tour in consulting, worked in corporate strategy for public company, joined a 120 ppl start-up in San Francisco as an exec, helped sell the company, joined another startup, helped sell that too, worked at a venture capital fund, now I'm working for a FB/Amazon/Goog and I'm still just as confused and unsure of my future and what everything means as the kid back in highschool. From the outside I'm becoming that one friend that ppl back home say " he really his shit tgt and I wish I can be him in XYZ" but I keep on telling my friends working 9-5 safe jobs and content with their lives that I'm really jealous and it's totally true. Anyways this is the longest post and the first comment I've made on TH-cam in years.
I didn't think that Asians like yourself grew up in the US, still have some of those Asian mindsets, especially like to feel financially safe, stay comfortable. Like Phil@Wongfu said, you are already so NOT Yappie. It makes me think how much impact our own family culture brings to our lives. I would say perhaps you are lucky to happen to live in the country/culture where you grew up in. People like first gen migrants would struggle so much just to fit in, not so say live the way they would have lived in the home country. Really liked your videos.
Hi Mayuko, I'm a new fan of yours , I don't know why but i found your videos interesting. I want to know more about your personal life... I just want to know how you started everything? Thank you .. XOXO - Mushie :)
hey Mayuko, i can relate real well to this as i'm also a woman yappie. thank you so much for creating this and giving us space on ur vids to discuss! on a side note, i think u might rly enjoy these books if you had time. "The Colonizer and the Colonized" by Albert Memmi "Black Skin, White Masks" & "The Wretched of the Earth" by Frantz Fanon these authors showed me how the structural formations of privilege, immigration, colonization, and oppression shaped the world to make it possible to us yappies to succeed today. one day, i hope to write my self-reflective master's thesis on how millenial asians in north america can often believe we r being safe, but unintentionally act in complicit ways to other kinds of oppression. we have what it takes to shape our world and make it more humane!
I don't think Software Engg . is a stable job and involves little risk. I actually feel like it is a lot of work. Even though it is a 9-5 kinda job, you are also constantly investing your time in staying updated and software engineers often change their companies frequently. What are your thoughts, @mayuko? I would really like to know.
People that were born rich have their ancestors worked hard and had opportunities . People like us, are those "ancestors". ... For me, I'll just take pride in the fact that their bright future (my lineage) depends on the decisions that I make now. I enjoy it though. Working hard. Nothing better than a guy with self-validation issues. Cheers!
What you do to avoid working as a software engineer for the next 40 years is save and INVEST. If you make enough money and control costs, you should have enough left to invest such that you can retire at 50. Don't fall for this "take chances" bullshit. We only ever hear from the people for whom that WORKED. Nobody ever has the person who lost everything and is broke and in debt on their talk show or interviews them on a TH-cam channel to tell their story of how they risked it all and LOST. You don't need to take risks in your position in order to be wealthy and retire early. You have set yourself up for success, don't be talked into changing your approach now. As for that stuff about doing "meaningful work that impacts the lives of others," that is the biggest load of bullshit of all. Let others impact their own lives, you worry about impacting YOUR life.
Great video to watch at the end of the year. I suppose I wouldn't call myself a Yappie (Welp for Hispanic terms, don't know the word xP) for I am still 19, not having a strong plan for the future, going to school yet undecided my career, and had little to no change in my life after high school. Not sure how but I hope to pursue a career I love. Perhaps I should look more into it rather than wasting time. I have been wasting time these previous years. Upcoming years shouldn't be same...
I have to say that I disagree with (most of) the dis on 9 to 5 office jobs. Okay there might be some that are boring but they are mainly boring to some but not to others. We all need to grow up, take responsibility and earn proper money at some point or we will become the burden of the society. There's nothing wrong with being an engineer, a scientist or an accountant, as long as you are enjoying your job. And who to say you are not taking risks doing your job? There's a risk in every single job. Every decision you make is a risk by itself, the end result may not be evolutionary but it still makes an impact, even though it might be just a minor impact on your job e.g. making a client happy. Who says you have to quit your job or uni to travel the world or to start up your own company to mean you are doing something meaningful in life? You can have hobbies, do charity, travel while doing your office job! And that's is actually better since you're financially stable so less stress, more joy and the society does not have to worry abt you. You could actually help! And no your job does not have to stay the same for the next 30 years. You can get a raise, get a promotion, help grow the business bigger, as long as you are determined, you can still take risks and move forward in your 'safe' job The key is that YOU are happy with your situation. If you're unhappy, by all means, quit your job, try something new. If you have the ability, please, set up a new business, provide more jobs, do more charity. But if everybody quits their job to take on some crazy risks, no one will have the finance to pay for your travel blog! So so what if your path seems a little straight forward, predictable, or... safe? It's what you're good at, it's what you enjoy. And if you manage to get a decent job within a couple of years after university, you're doing better the majority of the world which means you are good. And people who call you safe are just jealous of your success!
Hello mayuko, today's software drives car,make pizzas,t shirts,shoes even I convey my message to u by software.so I hope even ur intangible goals could be achieved by software.
Thanks for clarifying what a yappie is. I just found out about what a Sami is and wondered if they might be alike. Not even close. Auto correct what’s to use yuppie instead. Not sure where your geographic location is, but the world is all about you to peruse and discover those intangibles on your bucket list. Here’s a list of of what women on match in the Bay Area all seem to feel is a prerequisite for creating life experiences. Paddle boarding, traveling to Machu Pichu, tandem skydiving, visit the Grand Canyon, check out the northern lights while in Iceland, watch a sunset in Santorini, wine tasting trips, go to the 5 canyons in Utah, try to surf, and rafting down a river. So all of these has some slight danger built into them for the emotional enhancement required to meet the standard set by those who say you haven’t lived till you’ve done these at least once in your life. Oh and if they’re still trending a Mudder, Spartan, or one of those team military based physical activity, because they now have the freedom from their over protective parents. Just know your limits and the people you surround yourself with.
Woah woah woah. It's ok that you didn't want to pursue a risky carrier, even though people who are good at math and science are usually good at risk management; the U.S is a free country after all. The problem is that you and your family are afraid of the unknown. Thanks to the free market and many risk takers, people have jobs, healthcare, and crazy high technological standards that are growing exponentially. If you call yourself an American, you shouldn't dare say you're afraid of risk. That kind of thinking turns people into robots.
I'm very much part of the "work to live" kind of crowd. If you're a young, high earning professional, that's a really good thing! Just make sure you're using your free time and money to do the things that you find enjoyable and/or meaningful.
It's ok to be a yappie, no one needs to be have an impact on the world, no one needs to be a CEO or an influencer, people can remain professionals and that's perfectly a great position to be in, dare I say it's respectable and well-earned. Because these jobs eventually help people, regardless of the scale of the help. Knowing how to write exams and getting a job IS a skill and it's a fucking fantastic skill because it pays off immensely. A culture run by Hollywood imagines these kinds of people as robots, but fucking consider how people used to live, they didn't I mean couldn't afford vacations for some bs vlog, they had to fight boredom, disease,the climate, famine, they didn't have a fraction of the materail wealth that people in the west now easily live by. From that to NOW, we have so much going for us, why would I need to risk that, unless you really think you are that special and that much of a genius do whatever you need but besides that, what you have is a miracle in your palms, don't loose that.
so asian person is successful, gets criticized for being yappie. black/white/latino person does same thing, gets praised. WTF this is why i don't buy into the whole yappie thing. it's just more self-hatred or haters trying to bring a successful person down...
If you get to where you want to be, and have a financially stable career, there really isn't much more you could ask for. Life is complicated, but the one thing you almost certainly need to achieve your goals is money. If life goals were easily attainable, they'd be made irrelevant just as quickly. What you build over time is what's worth keeping: trial and error. Risking everything is a move of desperation, and the last thing any sane person considers.
Ok, before I even finished the video, I love your shark in the background, really sweet. I remember seeing the same shark plush years ago, was it from IKEA?
$$$ money talks - go where the companies pay you the most. Travel the world, etc. Who gives a shit about impacting the world there’s other rich people that will do it. Start small...help your small community first. Again money talks donate or help like food drive or clean up parks.
Well said although I think you can be a software engineer or another "safe" job and still do a lot of more "humany"/daring/life fulfilling things on the side, kinda like your youtube channel (as you mention). I'd like to think I'll continue volunteering at day cares even after i get a CS job
I'm really sad because I'm kinda following this path you speak (currently in college to be a computer engineer) but I really also wanna break out and do something great with my life. Day by day feels very dry and insignificant. I don't know if the universe wants me to be happy.
You played your hand optimally from what I can see. Why would you go after deep meaningful philosophical questions when all of us are stupid and incredibly naive at 20 years of age. You are now stable, older, mature and ready to go towards self actualization; good luck, I hope to get there soon enough!
Sometimes i look upon a yappie life and having that safety of a job and future, but at the same time i dont think those kinds of jobs fit me. Even though im just an incoming college freshman with the ability to change majors, im still afraid of doing so (im in liberal arts rn btw) bc idk what to change to. At the same time i want to change majors because im scared of not knowing whats out there, what kind of jobs are existing, how much ill make and everything in between. Tbh, like many ppl i'm really scared and afraid of whats to come. Theres just so much pressure to succeed and succeed well.
Great video Mayuko! I am a French living in Shanghai and am not a subscriber, but, I came across this video and I relate to what you're saying. Thanks.
It can give you a different perspective to consider that our ancestors did not deal with such issues. Not that long ago only 1 out of 10 children conceived made it to adulthood. Life was short, painful, and when it wasn't it was usually just miserable. Being a successful software engineer is a gift your parents gave you and you worked hard for. You already know all that, of course.
T_T I'm about to graduate the following semester as a computer science major, and this sort of hitting me hard right now. At this point I am stressing for both job security, but at the same time I also want to take a risk to open my own business, which has nothing to do with being a software engineer. At the same time I don't know if I would be comfortable just working a 9-5 job but I do want to do something where I would like to focus a majority of my time on, but on a bigger goal instead of working as a small employee of a company. Thanks for the video because it really hits home for me!
Yappie is also a way of insulting someone. Most Asians want the financial security, the good job. Its how we are educated by our parents. Especially if they are first generation immigrants living in the North America or Europe.
I feel like “yappie” is what most 1st generation people want. Since parents didn’t have much you want some type of security also. At least that’s how I feel I don’t want to change the world just want to make 3 digits I’ll let my children change the world.
Same here. Im being yappie for past 5 years and i quitted my five years job to work in better company. But the result is not really good. I got stuck on the new job, it didnt fit me and made me losing my balance work life. There was a morning i came to office and saw the empty room, i started wondering what im doing here but i couldnt do anything beside turned on computer. Until a few weeks ago i decided to leaving. Actually i dont have any plan now but i am just taking break and trying to reflect my life.
Great video Mayuko! Very well articulated! Your self reflection is what a lot of people need to do (or will do at some point) in their lives. There's nothing wrong w/ being a Yappie and achieving milestones... but "Now what?". What will you do once you've gotten there? Props to you for being a software engineer.. but ALSO starting a YT channel! You are SO not a typical yappie, so give yourself more credit. Keep it up, hope to meet someday. -phil (UCSD pride)
being honest tho, nobody heard of that term until you made that movie...
not a bad thing, i wanna be a yappie too now :(
I love the reflection. It's the absence of a safety net for immigrants that makes high percentage (safe) decisions compelling. As a group increases in size, then the safety to branch out into low percentage, high pay-off life options becomes greater. Think about it: if there's 10 people, the number of risk takers will be virtually 0 because the normal distribution suggests 95% will take the safe route. 0.5% will be super geniuses or super dopey and the balance will be a bit over or under. But as the numbers increase, those percentages might remain the same but meaningful clusters and echo chambers will have the opportunisty to form, explore and eventually translate to visible actions and role models. Thats theory anyway.
Phil W, you're an inspiration and your social justice message in yappie is amazing and overdue. I like to think your pioneering work is like the Oprah for under represented minorities!
pin this!! you got phil to comment
Wong Fu Productions I first totally agreed with the Yappie concept. While watching this video, I realize that it's not a Yappie thing, but in general a question/struggle for many young professionals, not necessarily Asians, but anyone possible. It's just whether this person raises this question to themselves. I am Chinese, born and raised in China, moved to Europe before 20 and am now over 30. I had this struggle too and I talked to friends in similar life phase. The difference I noticed between my international friends and local friends are that the people with international background do think more on this issue and I would say it's because they know there is other opportunities/possibilities because of their multicultural backgrounds. The majority of local friends have less struggles on it, because becoming young professionals is the (only) way they know and how it works with most people. Honestly, the majority people choose to "be safe" and they construct the functional society.
So, I do think it's great to reflect on it, but we can also see it from a more positive perspective. It's because of our international backgrounds, we are given more perspectives, more opportunities to reflect. People who are able to and are determined enough to decide for a new way are still the minority in almost every society. It's great to raise question about it, but I do think we don't have to categorize it to a unique "Asian" issue.
I am not sure if I am making my point clear enough. Just my thoughts while watching this video.
Probably because there is no real Chinese minority group where I am living, I am not categorizing myself to a certain group with immigration background (there is no single China town in any sense in this country). And the situation you are facing in the US must be totally different. Maybe that's why you are promoting this awareness to Asian groups.
That’s true about the name yappie but the ... idea to get something that is stable is something I been set to achieve. I’m a yappie as well right now, but like I want more. Something that provides more purpose or something that goes beyond what I should be able to achieve.
Mayuko, don't worry about the haters. Being a "yappie" is perfectly ok. Financial security now will give you the freedom to impact the world in a much bigger way. I can't understand the people who go to college and study something outside of STEM and then look down on those who do and say they are not cool or something like that. Ignore the haters.
jarji de unless you are going to fetch your own water, grow your own food and build your own shelter. Until then financial security's paramount to survival. Even beggars rely on the generosity of those more financially stable than they are. So it's pretty real actually.
jarji de that's true. That's why owning assets is most important. Letting all your money sit in a bank is probably not the way to go long term.
That's like saying health is an illusion because you might get hit by a car and lose your legs and therefore keeping fit and healthy isn't important. Financial security is absolutely a real thing and more often than not, it is a positive influence.
It's interesting you say that people who study things outside of STEM look down on those who do because as somebody who did study something outside of STEM, I found my experience to be the complete opposite. Luckily my non-STEM studies was something that prepared me to be a lawyer. I work in public interest so I feel like I am doing work to help people who would not otherwise receive help, but we talk about self-care and making sure you yourself are taken care of first. You can't fully help other people if your life is too unstable.
I love how you ended this video and just connected it all together. I'm a new software engineer in LA just trying to find my way and your videos have really helped. Thanks :)
I can relate to this SOOO SO much! I'm a high school junior and all the decisions I make in life are based off of my fears, too. I've decided to become a software engineer but only because I took a summer Comp Sci course and I kinda liked it, but mostly the job is well-paid. I've never really liked science or math, but rather I've always gravitated toward art and music and language, and yet I don't WANT to study liberal arts... uughh
Yappie - the TechLead's version of the "Golden Path"
Yes, there are benefits being a “Yappie” but investing, let your money make more money and learning to take risks gives a more long term security and income.
"Live your dreams, but do it responsibly"
the backdrop is killer
also thanks for sharing!
I can't believe no one recognized you yet. So i'll be the first one
hi
free willy! willy, be free!
Jarvis Johnson _Jarvis is trying his best_
Alex Avila come on man ? WTF ? Jarvis is trying his best.
I am yappie too, Young Asian Procrastinating...
HAHA
I guess you could be worse, you could be a paddy
"when you're striving for a milestone and not a mission, you can feel lost when you achieve it"
That hit way close to home.
I'm a yappie. or i was. And then I decided to quit my job and move to another country to reconnect with my culture (Taiwan), study ecology and try to make a difference in the world. Do I still worry about family, stability, and money?
yeah.
i do, every day.
But i feel like i'm making progress and slowly changing myself into someone that can be remembered for contributing to the world somehow.
For the last year, I've been thinking about how to make a difference. And I like your message and your method. It might just be the push i need to start a new channel and maybe start making videos.
I have the exact same thoughts! I know my parents and grandparents made so many sacrifices so that their children could get educated, and live a comfortable life. So it’s hard to balance making decisions based of fear of letting them down vs making decisions for myself and what I really want.
" I want to cry about things I didn't even know I could cry about" I'VE NEVER RELATED TO ANYTHING MORE THAN THIS STATEMENT
I've tried to follow the same path as being a Yappie except my plan kinda fell apart. I did everything, study hard, go to a good college. I was studying CS but started to struggle so I switched to an easier, more useless major and graduated. I'm still trying to land a decent software engineering job, but I'm just not qualified right now. I'm in a weird situation of not being good enough to be a Yappie, and not passionate about anything else enough to deviate from being a Yappie. So lost
Oh man, thanks for sharing your story - it’s important to me that I hear these slightly different stories about a different perspective. Hope everything works out, wishing you the best 💖
I think Wong fu is playing up yappie to generate views. I would not want any labels on Asians. Did you read the report of pew research about the ethnic segment with the with widest disparity in income - Asians. So I am totally against the propagation of yappie in these videos. It’s too elitist a mindset that discriminates other Asians who may not be doing good as them and cause depression. At one point in time a report states that the most depressed Asians in the US are the Asian males in the US, especially transplants. Yappie is putting pressure on other Asians who don’t have it as good as mayuko. I wished even these yappies stop with the labeling. It’s not healthy. Even yuppie back in the day was considered a put down. If I recall correctly, the book American psycho also used it to mock the character in the book. Using yappie can bite you back in the a...
Actually, I'm just like you. I dropped out of CS because I was struggling, graduated in a non-CS major. Did Real Estate for a while. Got very bored of it. Started to study CS again. But this time it was not in school. I think I didn't like all the theory in my college classes. I wanted application. This time, I'm much more committed to my learning and I've gotten further than I've ever gone before. But also programming is what I picked for myself, not anyone else. CS/Programming is very knowledge based. You can't do what you don't know. It's also very vast. Find a field in CS that you are passionate about and learn everything about it. Once you know enough, the obstacles will no longer be obstacles.
I kind of went through a similar situation in school but really turned it around. I was in pure Math - Acturual science. Didn't even know what it really was but was told if you're smart and good with math you should do this. Turns out you need to have 0 personality to do that as a career and it's prob the safest of safe yappie careers.
I switched to econ and graduated with an "easier and less useful" major and realized with an undergrad alone there's no real job. So I hustled super hard the year before graduation and talked to over 80 ppl in different consulting firms to land a job. That hustling have followed me since and I've always tried to talk to ppl through informational chats first to land the job. I find many Asians are shy to do this, shy to reach out to strangers. If you do it in a humble and respectful way that also show you're more hungry than other candidates, you can break in. Over the years I've managed to land jobs at McKinsey, Deloitte, Facebook, google, Uber, VC funds through this and have seen other friends from Arts majors that self taught engineering eventually end up at Google and FB.
Hang in there and keep on hustling!
yeah play up views and put down fellow asians. that's just idiotic to me.
I am Yappie too : Young African Professional.
Sofiane Koud lol
So am I. We're all Yappies
No niga a for Asian
The term is directed at Asians, there’s no such thing as what you’re referring to
There is now, they just conceptualised it.
I think that this "yappie"/"yi(2)ppie" (Young Immigrant/2nd Generation Immigrant Professional) approach to living is quite pleasant if you position yourself in a stable job that you actually enjoy. The financial stability and resulting mental stability that these kinds of jobs provide form a strong foundation for a happy life.
As a person who quit a financially and mentally rewarding management consulting job in North America to start a business in Japan well outside of my area of expertise and in my second language to try something new, I often contemplate where I'm sitting in life from the opposite side of the mirror as you, Mayuko, and I wonder if I made the right decision to step through the glass. Jumping into the unknown is as scary as it is rewarding... except it may not necessarily be rewarding (speaking in terms of financial gain)!
And honestly, I think it took making the jump to make me see the value in the yappie/yi(2)ppie lifestyle. Many of my friends have reaped the rewards of their parents' hard work (whether they were low income / start-from-scratch immigrants or born domestically in a low income bracket), and are now living comfortable lives that I envy in many ways.
The benefits of my current position are autonomy, the satisfaction associated with making clearly visible impacts on the community and receiving recognition for it, and the influx of new skills I've acquired. The downsides are sole culpability for my failures, ongoing anxiety around growing and maintaining the business, and wondering if what I'm doing is sustainable or even desirable from a lifestyle perspective in the long run. Oh, and crappy paperwork.
I think that which lifestyle is better for you really depends on your personality, but I also think that is an excellent idea to take a swing at more than one so that you know what's out there and can see from experience which road is optimal for you. You can always cut across the hedge back to the road you came from if what you see doesn't tickle your fancy.
Whichever road we choose, we can make a big impact on the people around us by taking pleasure in the process of getting to our milestones and using that positive energy to work hard and give something back to everyone.
Good luck with your thinking! Maybe I'll see you back on that side of the mirror one of these days to pick up even more kinds of wonderful human experiences.
Charles
Holy wow, thanks for sharing your incredible story!
i had a similar experience as yours, and now i realize so much of it was rebelling against success and self sabotage. it is a weird thing humans do to themselves. lessons learned though. this is why i don't buy into the whole "asians only chase academic/financial succcess" thing. i feel like most of it is just jealous members of society trying to through us off track mentally, like to hate ourselves or something.
who isn't chasing success? if we do it through academics that is because it is a merit-based system. there is plenty of racial prejudice (ie bamboo ceiling) in other areas. it's great other asians branch out into acting, music, etc, but to do it because somebody says you are otherwise a 'typical yappie' is plain toxic and being manipulated.
My name is Charles (Charlie) and this comment really hit home for me as a Filipino-American. Thanks for posting!
Well the 9-5 careerist life in a world of capitalism is pretty isolating and soul sucking tbh. Your feelings are natural, wanting to be more socially driven and motivated to do more human enrinching things that dont have to do with money & bills is natural. Now to what extent you puruse these ideas is up to you but i do hope you find what moves you
I wanted to strive to be a Computer Scientist in university just because I thought that it was the most practical job to benefit the society. I already had intense music roots and came from a very musical background and wanted to be a DJ since middle school. I am 21 years old now and I just dropped out of university and started to realize that deep inside my purpose was to create and mix music for people making them feel good their special days. I am striving to start my own business with my TH-cam channel here to help people with overcoming hormonal acne (random) and DJ business. I can only be really good at something that I am truly passionate about!! I am going to start producing music as well.
Sonia Anastasia Good for you! Taking risks is what leads to growth. We’ve been conditioned and programmed to play it safe. There are days that I wonder if working 9-5 is all there is to it.
Lol 20 minutes before Wong Fu dropped season finale
(Edit) :
Seriously loved the honesty and advice you gave Mayuko!❤
I'm struggling with this exact problem, and I resonate so much with this video. A lot of the tangible things are easy once I just wait it out or keep working in tech. However the intangible things just stress me out because I REALLY want to do them (your list is literally a great one haha) but I have no idea how I can achieve them. This emotion kind of increased since I've started TH-cam but in tandem it's also opened up a lot of doors I've never realized. Thanks Mayuko for sharing your thoughts. This put things in words I never imagined.
Yayyyyyy! Loved the distinction between "milestone" and "mission." Also oh my goodness I love when you move and your pup is just sleeping there!
I like your eyebrows!
Nothing wrong with being afraid or cautious in life. It's the Asian thing to do. You can take risks and still be cautious, but instead of taking risks in career, maybe take risks in activities, go out and do more random stuff. I'm proud to be a Yappie 👍 well, not the 'P' part yet, just a fresh grad.
Great video and wonderful insights! Taking risks is what leads to growth and discovering what you truly love and are meant to do. We’ve been conditioned and programmed to play it safe. There are days that I wonder if working 9-5 is all there is to it.
As a millennial with an immigrant background who studied engineering, I can really relate to the thoughts of "Am I playing it too safe?" The way I see it, it is my goal to provide the future generations of family with the financial foundation to attempt audacious, risky goals knowing that they have the financial safety net if it doesn't work out.
I’m probably in the minority here, but it seems like you’re looking for a solution to a problem that isn’t clearly defined.
It’s as if you’re being challenged by someone else’s metric of a successful life which is hyped personal and subjective.
When I saw the title of this video I though it was going to be something like joma's "I'm a brogrammer" video. But then I watched it and wow
Wisdom in youth exists! Nice one.
Hello Mayuko,
I really liked your video and your way of seeing things. In my case I am living something similar to yours, in the sense that I have not yet graduated from university, but I already have a stable job. The truth is that at times it scares me to think about my future, to see myself as I am right now, only older. I have that small and great feeling at the same time to leave everything, make a business of my own and grow up and explore more of this life. Anyway, I just want you to know that your videos make me feel relieved, I think that all of us who watch your channel feel very comfortable and accompanied when we see you and hear you talk about life. I think we should all do it from time to time.
Sorry for my English, it's not my native language, I'm from Guatemala and I speak Spanish, but I hope you have understood me.
Greetings mayuko, now you know that you also have a fan in Guatemala :)
Luis, your English is fantastic, don't you ever worry about it.
I feel like I would be considered the white version of a yappie. Live my life to reach certain goals only to feel like I've wasted time for many of them. Its only now that I've started to self analyze myself more. Recently I made it through my first year of college. After seeing so much complacency and laziness of other students along with a boring and repetitive internship this summer, I've come to realize that I want more from life. I want a challenge and I want to feel like I'm making a difference. Only time will tell if I will be able to achieve something meaningful to me.
You either do it or you don't. Ignore what your fellow students are doing. They are a poor metric for comparison since most people are mediocre and will not achieve anything substantial.
The best time to start realizing your goals is now. Join a lab or get involved in some programming projects. Do something that will help you grow as an individual and develop a useful skillset.
Another stupid made up term to make yourself feel important. 🙄
Computer hardware engineering student here. While getting my bachelors of science is important, what will happen afterward in terms of what jobs I will do is still very unsure and unknown. In order to help this, I am pursuing several internships. It is indeed scary to confront the unknown, however with the support of my family it is better. Your message of taking the safe route is very respectable. All of these people who are disillusioned into thinking they can make it on youtube or twitch need to watch this video. Keep up the good work.
This is an excellent video. Thank you for so much for your contribution. I think it is important to have a good balance because if you don't you could end up living the rest of your life in a bubble and regretting never venturing outside of that little bubble. You could end up Walling yourself off into a very small space just because you're playing it safe. On the other hand, if you spend your entire life venturing to different places and things, when the time comes that you cannot venture anymore, you will not have anything to fall back on and then you'll be screwed. It's all about the balance.
Wow, very well said! (:
Wow, well said 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻
You need talk to techlead.
FUTURE LIFE PLANS
PLAN A:
Complete Plan B until Plan A is ready. Plan A is to do what ever I want in the future.
PLAN B:
Become Computer Software Hardware Engineer as back up plan If Plan A fails.
PLAN C:
If plan A and B fail, create Plan D
PLAN D:
[ unknown]
PLAN E:
If plan D fails... good luck future me
Note:
Future me, if you somehow manage to f*ck up Plan A-E, what the hell are you doing. Get your life together and create plan F-Z.
Also, future me, if you don’t take that trip to Japan before your thirties.... you know the consequences
Glad I'm not the only one having an existential crisis every couple days or so D:
That soft shark pillow is what life's about. Also, I am so proud of a fellow Triton opening up about their life story. I went the medical school route after graduating from UCSD in 2015 and am now a third year. Thinking back though, it certainly seemed that my whole life was about min-maxing outcomes and following the "statistically best" path to reach wealth and success. It wasn't exactly a comfortable ride getting here, BUT I can confidently say it was still cushy relative to what my peers went through. I feel overly privileged, but at the same time entitled since 100% of my academic success was forged brick by brick with my own hands. Like Fung Bros said in their Yappie video, growing up in a nice box has its perks, but also immeasurable constraints.
I'm a yappie too: Young Athlete Professional
Great video! It is very interesting how different cultures see success and self-realization in different ways. I am a mexican (living in México) CS student and I feel that, my goal is to master the skills to make it to Silicon Valley. It is hard, because in mexican culture, family is a really strong concept so it is hard to stay away from them, but If that means that I will be able to work in a meaningful and technical-challenging work, then I will do it.
IMO, you're just being responsible. The people who go out, take risks, and become influential almost always come from a wealthy family, and thus they have something to fall back on if things don't pan out. (I imagine that they usually don't, but wealthy individuals have huge networks that allow for greater success rates compared to attempts made by the less affluent). Look up any hugely influential person, and you will see the pattern. It sucks for the rest of us normal people, but that's life. Note however that you don't need to make an impact when you're young. Take care of yourself now, build up a safety net, then go out and do your thing. (This is my plan at least.)
I'm a Yappie too in the software industry and have had similar thoughts. I used to think once I made $100k a year it would be "enough" and I'd be satisfied with my success. Well, I made it there in a hurry and realized nothing special happened. I was still the same old me. So I set the bar higher, $200k. The past two years I've reached $450k in annual income from my job, and at 30 years old I feel like nothing revolutionary has occurred in my life over the past decade. Sure, I can live in a slightly better neighborhood, afford more vacations, drive a better car, and the numbers on my financial statements grow larger. But lifestyle-wise I'm not making the kind of dough that is really life-changing. Then I realized the folks with true wealth ($1+ million in income per year with $25+ million net worth minimum) are NOT the ones working for someone else. To reach that point you gotta go out and do your own thing, which entails massive amounts of the exact thing that I've been underexposed to most of my life, and that you've mentioned in your video -- RISK. For now I'll keep collecting a comfy and fat paycheck but like you, there's always an anxiety that I'm wasting away years that I could be using to build true wealth...
But then again... what will you really gain (aside from money of course) by making $1 million+ per year and building "true wealth?" You can probably move to an even better neighborhood, take a few more vacations, drive multiple luxury cars, etc... but what else? Are you happy at your current job? Do you have other passion you wish to pursue? What kind of "lifestyle" are you looking for?
your not much of a yappie when you have a youtube channel this large and create content. or at least in my opinion. Yappie's are pretty unoriginal and don't take risks like putting themselves out there like being a youtuber. Idk if that made sense but hopefully that sinks in.
Love it! Thank you for being so honest and so open about your insecurity and doubts! Definitely inspiring and making a positive impact on me!
Really enjoyed the ending message. I've been feeling the same way!
Woo I’m a software engineer from UCSD as well 🔱 AND I make TH-cam videos 😅❤️
Thank you for this! You touched on many important concepts I have been thinking and learned about for the past few months as a student. Also, Wong-Fu rocks! You should also take a look at Gary Vaynerchuck's YT channel as well (beyond the motivational side).
I like your sold, my dear 💘🥀💕
Asian culture do tend to focus on financial security but tons of jobs that's financially secure don't really impact the world in a positive way. I have Asian friends working as accountants, working some kind of engineer, and I hear how they're working only for the salary. I'm Chinese Canadian and I didn't pursue that path, I went for a job in health care and I don't see my job for its salary, but for its potential to help people. I think that's what most people should strive for - you can be an engineer, you can be an accountant, but ideally you want to put that in good use, to be making a "positive impact" for others. And you can. You can work for some kind of non-profit organization or an organization that's developing software that has a positive impact somewhere. If your current job isn't giving you that, you might want to pursue another company. I'm sure after a few years of experience switching jobs shouldn't be too challenging.
The dog keeled over from all the heavy, yappie talk...
Great thoughts there Mayuko! It’s important to question these things and where you are heading. I do so myself but never come up with great or original answers 🤔
i am sO glad i found your channel and you ! you basically explained everything im feeling so articulately! to see an asian woman who's out of college who already finished the path im currently on is so comforting and makes me so happy to know that this is a normal internal conflict to feel holy shit i am INSPIRED
💖💖💖 girl YES you got this 💪💪💪
Woah, you just said the EXACT same things I've been thinking about lately in terms of what I want out of life. Nice to hear it from another person/perspective.
Good to see that dogs also randomly stretch their paws to the air while lying on the bed
Kudos to you for finding a new passion in youtube and following it. I am still a hardcore yappie, engineering software with a straight face all day, just because it pays well. Someday I hope to break out too...
"Hello, I am a Yuko."
You are a what? Oh, oh Mayuko... nvm
This is a great video. I love how transparent you are about your life and I totally understand where you are coming from and I am super excited for your next video! And your back drop is fire!!
Yappie, kind of a weird concept for me, mixing racial identity with other characteristics, but in general it probably makes sense, btw those intangible goals, I feel like for most people everything revolves around them, be it that they're trying hard to understand and follow them or be it that they're ignoring them to pursue the tangible ones, but at the end of the day intangible goals are the most important, they can change you and fill your life. Having said that I wouldn't worry to much about understanding them, this kind of things usually happen on awhim, one day you wake up and ask your friends "have you ever thought about crossing the US by car and get to know all kinds of people in the meantime?" and a month later you do it, it's more about allowing yourself to risk it and do it rather than thinking about what to do (I'm immansily tired right now, this comment might make no sense, sorry)
Excellent and very relatable video, loved it! I think the challenge is really trying to find that balance between a good working and paying job and a meaningful impactful life.
Damn, I relate to this vid so well. I'm only in high school, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to end up taking the same path as a yappie. I don't think I could really see myself doing anything else though. For me, I think one of the reasons why computer science appealed to me so much was because of it's broad range of influence. Since you can create software for pretty much anything and/or anyone, it feels like it'll never be too late to have some sort of impact. But I think I'm definitely still in the process to find myself, and maybe then I'll find something worth taking a risk for. But for now, I think being a yappie is perfectly fine. Being stable has a lot of power to it, and sometimes that can be your pathway towards doing what you love, or putting you in a position where you can take risks.
I have to say that this was one of the most inspiring videos I've ever seen to motivate myself!
Dang only 20 minutes after yappie's finale release
Love the ending so much!
TIL. Just knowing the terms 'Yappie' from this video. Unfortunately, I'm really risking myself at building a startup and set my college aside on my last year of college :'( Wish me luck! #NotAYappieTeam
You got this, fam. Cheering for you!
Hi myakuko, why wouldn't you come to Europe to try a new human, cultural, and professional experience?
Great video :')
How many of those goals are actually other people's goals being projected onto you via social media, TH-cam, etc.? I think it would be quite easy to draw the line between indecisiveness, feeling of inadequacy, and unhappiness with the idea that those aren't your dreams they are someone else's. I'm convinced, at it may be just me, that if what you actually want lines up with what you do these things are minimized.
Also, I have been around the world a few times and I have experienced far more than I ever expected. Even working in the shittiest conditions possible with factory workers in China and seeing the reality of life in many places. Tourist stuff can't get you that. This has almost all been thanks to my job where I travel (software engineer as well btw) plenty. Is it safe of me to do this? Is it not chasing my intangibles and checking things off my list? I just happened to find something that was safe and lined up with what I wanted to do in my 20's. It also keeps me financially secure. Trust me, everything is better when you are financially secure. You can do things that other people can't and not have to worry. People who downplay this are just lying.
Case in point, don't do things for the sake of them or because other people say you should. The meaningfulness will be diminished. It's like going to Thailand and only going to tourist places. You did what people told you to, but you didn't experience anything you couldn't have in America besides a much longer flight. Do what you want and if that is playing safe and being financially secure, all the more power to you. You are a rarity in that case and have nothing to be ashamed of.
My advice is: be careful what you wish for. It might just come true.
The things you mention you want to do is actually very easy to achieve. Want to cry about a thing you didn't know you can cry about? Want to experience a wide range of human emotions? Want to get to know new people, new culture, etc?
MOVE TO AFGHANISTAN.
Loved this video♡♡
You summed up many of my thoughts, I’m subscribing. SAFE not a bad thing but I’m slowly increasing my risk evaluation in order to achieve “more” in my life. I suffered disillusionment as an ABC, had identity crisis, had a existential crisis in middle school.
Risk adverse (fear) foster stagnation and reward challenge.
"when you have a milestone and not a mission, you're lost when you achieve it" - TRUTH!
This is exactly what I've been struggling with the last few years. Going from failing grades in elementary school (actually failing, not Asian fail) to top student by the end of highschool and getting into a top University, I thought all my problems would be answered. They were not. I was lost and had no sense of purpose because my whole life I've been told to get into a top school, I'm there and I had no idea what's next and completely messed up my first 2 years of undergrad. Then by the time I graduated I worked my grades up and hustled into a career in management consulting. I thought I'd be happy hitting that milestone but I was more sad than ever because consulting was just another way for me to delay commitment to a career.
Fast forward 4 years, I did my tour in consulting, worked in corporate strategy for public company, joined a 120 ppl start-up in San Francisco as an exec, helped sell the company, joined another startup, helped sell that too, worked at a venture capital fund, now I'm working for a FB/Amazon/Goog and I'm still just as confused and unsure of my future and what everything means as the kid back in highschool.
From the outside I'm becoming that one friend that ppl back home say " he really his shit tgt and I wish I can be him in XYZ" but I keep on telling my friends working 9-5 safe jobs and content with their lives that I'm really jealous and it's totally true.
Anyways this is the longest post and the first comment I've made on TH-cam in years.
I didn't think that Asians like yourself grew up in the US, still have some of those Asian mindsets, especially like to feel financially safe, stay comfortable. Like Phil@Wongfu said, you are already so NOT Yappie. It makes me think how much impact our own family culture brings to our lives. I would say perhaps you are lucky to happen to live in the country/culture where you grew up in. People like first gen migrants would struggle so much just to fit in, not so say live the way they would have lived in the home country. Really liked your videos.
Would love to hear about your story with cultural identity! I know I have had interesting things since I am mixed going through software engineering.
yes!
My Brother and I ....... NOT "Me and my brother", if you're going to claim you speak perfect English. Some Yappie.
Hi Mayuko, I'm a new fan of yours , I don't know why but i found your videos interesting. I want to know more about your personal life... I just want to know how you started everything? Thank you .. XOXO - Mushie :)
hey Mayuko, i can relate real well to this as i'm also a woman yappie. thank you so much for creating this and giving us space on ur vids to discuss! on a side note, i think u might rly enjoy these books if you had time.
"The Colonizer and the Colonized" by Albert Memmi
"Black Skin, White Masks" & "The Wretched of the Earth" by Frantz Fanon
these authors showed me how the structural formations of privilege, immigration, colonization, and oppression shaped the world to make it possible to us yappies to succeed today. one day, i hope to write my self-reflective master's thesis on how millenial asians in north america can often believe we r being safe, but unintentionally act in complicit ways to other kinds of oppression. we have what it takes to shape our world and make it more humane!
I don't think Software Engg . is a stable job and involves little risk. I actually feel like it is a lot of work. Even though it is a 9-5 kinda job, you are also constantly investing your time in staying updated and software engineers often change their companies frequently. What are your thoughts, @mayuko? I would really like to know.
We’re a yappie family
People that were born rich have their ancestors worked hard and had opportunities . People like us, are those "ancestors".
...
For me, I'll just take pride in the fact that their bright future (my lineage) depends on the decisions that I make now. I enjoy it though. Working hard. Nothing better than a guy with self-validation issues. Cheers!
What you do to avoid working as a software engineer for the next 40 years is save and INVEST. If you make enough money and control costs, you should have enough left to invest such that you can retire at 50.
Don't fall for this "take chances" bullshit. We only ever hear from the people for whom that WORKED. Nobody ever has the person who lost everything and is broke and in debt on their talk show or interviews them on a TH-cam channel to tell their story of how they risked it all and LOST. You don't need to take risks in your position in order to be wealthy and retire early. You have set yourself up for success, don't be talked into changing your approach now.
As for that stuff about doing "meaningful work that impacts the lives of others," that is the biggest load of bullshit of all. Let others impact their own lives, you worry about impacting YOUR life.
Great video to watch at the end of the year.
I suppose I wouldn't call myself a Yappie (Welp for Hispanic terms, don't know the word xP) for I am still 19, not having a strong plan for the future, going to school yet undecided my career, and had little to no change in my life after high school. Not sure how but I hope to pursue a career I love. Perhaps I should look more into it rather than wasting time. I have been wasting time these previous years. Upcoming years shouldn't be same...
I have to say that I disagree with (most of) the dis on 9 to 5 office jobs. Okay there might be some that are boring but they are mainly boring to some but not to others. We all need to grow up, take responsibility and earn proper money at some point or we will become the burden of the society. There's nothing wrong with being an engineer, a scientist or an accountant, as long as you are enjoying your job. And who to say you are not taking risks doing your job? There's a risk in every single job. Every decision you make is a risk by itself, the end result may not be evolutionary but it still makes an impact, even though it might be just a minor impact on your job e.g. making a client happy.
Who says you have to quit your job or uni to travel the world or to start up your own company to mean you are doing something meaningful in life? You can have hobbies, do charity, travel while doing your office job! And that's is actually better since you're financially stable so less stress, more joy and the society does not have to worry abt you. You could actually help! And no your job does not have to stay the same for the next 30 years. You can get a raise, get a promotion, help grow the business bigger, as long as you are determined, you can still take risks and move forward in your 'safe' job
The key is that YOU are happy with your situation. If you're unhappy, by all means, quit your job, try something new. If you have the ability, please, set up a new business, provide more jobs, do more charity. But if everybody quits their job to take on some crazy risks, no one will have the finance to pay for your travel blog!
So so what if your path seems a little straight forward, predictable, or... safe? It's what you're good at, it's what you enjoy. And if you manage to get a decent job within a couple of years after university, you're doing better the majority of the world which means you are good. And people who call you safe are just jealous of your success!
Hello mayuko, today's software drives car,make pizzas,t shirts,shoes even I convey my message to u by software.so I hope even ur intangible goals could be achieved by software.
Thanks for clarifying what a yappie is. I just found out about what a Sami is and wondered if they might be alike. Not even close. Auto correct what’s to use yuppie instead. Not sure where your geographic location is, but the world is all about you to peruse and discover those intangibles on your bucket list. Here’s a list of of what women on match in the Bay Area all seem to feel is a prerequisite for creating life experiences. Paddle boarding, traveling to Machu Pichu, tandem skydiving, visit the Grand Canyon, check out the northern lights while in Iceland, watch a sunset in Santorini, wine tasting trips, go to the 5 canyons in Utah, try to surf, and rafting down a river. So all of these has some slight danger built into them for the emotional enhancement required to meet the standard set by those who say you haven’t lived till you’ve done these at least once in your life. Oh and if they’re still trending a Mudder, Spartan, or one of those team military based physical activity, because they now have the freedom from their over protective parents. Just know your limits and the people you surround yourself with.
Woah woah woah. It's ok that you didn't want to pursue a risky carrier, even though people who are good at math and science are usually good at risk management; the U.S is a free country after all. The problem is that you and your family are afraid of the unknown. Thanks to the free market and many risk takers, people have jobs, healthcare, and crazy high technological standards that are growing exponentially. If you call yourself an American, you shouldn't dare say you're afraid of risk. That kind of thinking turns people into robots.
I'm very much part of the "work to live" kind of crowd. If you're a young, high earning professional, that's a really good thing! Just make sure you're using your free time and money to do the things that you find enjoyable and/or meaningful.
It's ok to be a yappie, no one needs to be have an impact on the world, no one needs to be a CEO or an influencer, people can remain professionals and that's perfectly a great position to be in, dare I say it's respectable and well-earned. Because these jobs eventually help people, regardless of the scale of the help. Knowing how to write exams and getting a job IS a skill and it's a fucking fantastic skill because it pays off immensely.
A culture run by Hollywood imagines these kinds of people as robots, but fucking consider how people used to live, they didn't I mean couldn't afford vacations for some bs vlog, they had to fight boredom, disease,the climate, famine, they didn't have a fraction of the materail wealth that people in the west now easily live by. From that to NOW, we have so much going for us, why would I need to risk that, unless you really think you are that special and that much of a genius do whatever you need but besides that, what you have is a miracle in your palms, don't loose that.
so asian person is successful, gets criticized for being yappie. black/white/latino person does same thing, gets praised. WTF this is why i don't buy into the whole yappie thing. it's just more self-hatred or haters trying to bring a successful person down...
If you get to where you want to be, and have a financially stable career, there really isn't much more you could ask for.
Life is complicated, but the one thing you almost certainly need to achieve your goals is money.
If life goals were easily attainable, they'd be made irrelevant just as quickly.
What you build over time is what's worth keeping: trial and error.
Risking everything is a move of desperation, and the last thing any sane person considers.
Ok, before I even finished the video, I love your shark in the background, really sweet. I remember seeing the same shark plush years ago, was it from IKEA?
$$$ money talks - go where the companies pay you the most. Travel the world, etc. Who gives a shit about impacting the world there’s other rich people that will do it.
Start small...help your small community first. Again money talks donate or help like food drive or clean up parks.
Well said although I think you can be a software engineer or another "safe" job and still do a lot of more "humany"/daring/life fulfilling things on the side, kinda like your youtube channel (as you mention). I'd like to think I'll continue volunteering at day cares even after i get a CS job
I'm really sad because I'm kinda following this path you speak (currently in college to be a computer engineer) but I really also wanna break out and do something great with my life. Day by day feels very dry and insignificant. I don't know if the universe wants me to be happy.
You played your hand optimally from what I can see. Why would you go after deep meaningful philosophical questions when all of us are stupid and incredibly naive at 20 years of age. You are now stable, older, mature and ready to go towards self actualization; good luck, I hope to get there soon enough!
Guess what? You're actually reaching and inspiring people by posting videos here on YT. So that's something that is meaningful, if there's anything.
Sometimes i look upon a yappie life and having that safety of a job and future, but at the same time i dont think those kinds of jobs fit me. Even though im just an incoming college freshman with the ability to change majors, im still afraid of doing so (im in liberal arts rn btw) bc idk what to change to. At the same time i want to change majors because im scared of not knowing whats out there, what kind of jobs are existing, how much ill make and everything in between. Tbh, like many ppl i'm really scared and afraid of whats to come. Theres just so much pressure to succeed and succeed well.
Great video Mayuko! I am a French living in Shanghai and am not a subscriber, but, I came across this video and I relate to what you're saying. Thanks.
It can give you a different perspective to consider that our ancestors did not deal with such issues. Not that long ago only 1 out of 10 children conceived made it to adulthood. Life was short, painful, and when it wasn't it was usually just miserable. Being a successful software engineer is a gift your parents gave you and you worked hard for. You already know all that, of course.
T_T I'm about to graduate the following semester as a computer science major, and this sort of hitting me hard right now.
At this point I am stressing for both job security, but at the same time I also want to take a risk to open my own business, which has nothing to do with being a software engineer.
At the same time I don't know if I would be comfortable just working a 9-5 job but I do want to do something where I would like to focus a majority of my time on, but on a bigger goal instead of working as a small employee of a company.
Thanks for the video because it really hits home for me!
Yappie is also a way of insulting someone. Most Asians want the financial security, the good job. Its how we are educated by our parents. Especially if they are first generation immigrants living in the North America or Europe.
I feel like “yappie” is what most 1st generation people want. Since parents didn’t have much you want some type of security also. At least that’s how I feel I don’t want to change the world just want to make 3 digits I’ll let my children change the world.
Getting to know people... Scratch that one off your list. Overrated, and you'll end up loseing your overall warmth towards what is called "humanity".
Same here. Im being yappie for past 5 years and i quitted my five years job to work in better company. But the result is not really good. I got stuck on the new job, it didnt fit me and made me losing my balance work life. There was a morning i came to office and saw the empty room, i started wondering what im doing here but i couldnt do anything beside turned on computer. Until a few weeks ago i decided to leaving. Actually i dont have any plan now but i am just taking break and trying to reflect my life.