Bullet Baby was confirmed in the comments of the subreddit as being a zombie fetus trying to eat itself out of a pregnant woman. Author just didn't know the word fetus and had a hard time getting it across.
Most boring explanation: The gun was unloaded b/c it ran out of bullets after shooting other zombocoms, and the pregnant woman passed along her infection to the bullet baby before the pov character noticed anything
I like how the author 1: didn’t know the word fetus and 2: was bad at getting their point across in such few words. It’s like they shouldn’t be writing a two sentence horror story about a thing they didn’t know the word for.
@@manskronqvist2537 Yvonne Nicole Brown's line from Community is always in my head when my sentences get long: "They should've called him the Run-On Sentence Bandit!"
In the mass death one, I feel like it would've come across a lot better if the second sentence was something like "As a boot descended from the sky, I realized I should've been more specific."
Didn’t kill it, but I legit almost ran over a squirrel on my bicycle before it finally darted away at the last minute. In this hypothetical scenario I would be clotheslined by a fucking bike tire out of nowhere and that idea is sending me rn
I thought it was that if you’ve eaten, hunted, picked, cut down anything (plants are living organisms too) you count as a killer. So everyone was dying
41:12 "After seeing her eyes turn black I excused myself to the toilet and summoned Dave, but he seemed as terrified as I was." All I can picture is this guy stepping into the bathroom, cupping his hands around his mouth, and yelling into the toilet, "HEY, DAVE!!!"
@@yourlocalnerd7788 Sent a shiver down your spine, though, didn't it? Don't worry, it'll never happen. Netflix couldn't risk a headline that says "Netflix to adapt story by the creators of Monster Girl Safari"
@@DarkExcalibur42: Also, they can't do that shit without the permission of the creators. That's the whole point of IP, you can't adapt something you don't have the rights to.
51:52 pretty sure this story is trying to say that if you killed anything, *EVER* (bugs, plants, germs, etc), you would die the same way (crushed, dehydrated, etc)
They're my least favourite for actual spooks but I think their the best for unintentional comedy, mainly cause the author had to give enough details so we can guess which tragedy it is. Just picturing the author furiously looking up the exact hour it happened, just so they can break narrative flow with copy pasted dates and times gives me a chuckle.
@@peppyboi9710 "Have a good August 9th, 1945, 11:01 Japanese Standard Time, " I told my beautiful wife and three children. I'm so glad to live in the beautiful Urikami Valley area of Nagasaki.
okay I think the "anyone who's killed dies the same way as their victim" one is implying they should've specified anyone who's killed other humans? the vibe I got was like anyone who's ever stepped on a bug is getting spontaneously crushed or something like that
Perhaps my favorite idea to come from this episode is that the trees have the ability to wage war, presumably also some form of government in order to be capable of declaring war, a whole tree society, and they WAITED for people to develop the technology to talk to trees before they immediately declared war, like they have such respect for international law they will literally just let the amazon be cut down until humans made it possible to formally declare war instead of just day-of-the-triffids-ing them.
My least favourite subgenre of r/twosentencehorror story are the ones where “The EpiPen Don’t Work” is the twist. I’m including the inhaler one under that umbrella.
I like to think that the father fully loaded his revolver but by bending reality the baby managed to put those bullets in its mouth, and now the father can never escape his responsibility to take care of the bullet baby
The "Everyone who has killed" story includes animals. That's what they should have been specific about. Now everyone who's ever killed a fly are dropping like flies.
i was the albino child left alone in the sun for hours. no really i actually have albinism lmao - thanks for the correcting of misinfo and mentioning the very real violence ppl with albinism face in certain countries, genuinely, it’s appreciated. :) ❤
There are some medical conditions that cause sensitivity to the sun, some can be very severe. There's also Giant Hogweed which creates a sensitivity to the sun, causing blisters in reaction to exposure to the sun. None of these are albinism.
There are great Kings and Presidents in Hell, who command terrible legions and bring ruin to nations. Dave is lower management in a Hell Fuck Factory. He’s microscopic.
I feel like the common problem is that these writers are trying to write a story that can't fit in two sentences so it ends up being an abomination of strange endings and plot points that only made sense in the writer's head. Maybe they should have wrote a short story.
Home invasion stuff is super freaky to me, so that incorrect password got me. I remember reading another one a few years ago that went along the lines of: "Every night before bed, I close and lock the window to my room. And every morning, I do the exact same thing." My room at the time had a window that would have been really easy to break into if someone was so inclined, so that probably heightened the fear for me.
The tree war one reminds me of a single sentence i read once that always makes my imagination race "The rocks are quiet because the trees are listening." And although it is not strictly a horror thing, it is much more eerie than that tree war thing could ever be
I've got a two-sentence horror story: As I put the disc into the DVD player and sat down in my chair, the most unspeakable thing appeared on the screen which shocked me to the core. "You have attempted to play a Divx disc in a DVD player not equipped with the Divx feature."
The albino child one actually kinda works. The idea is that the kids saw a normal albino child, thought he was a vampire, tied him up and attacked him, which made him start screaming. It was sunny out, so the kids thought that was why he was screaming.The horror comes from realizing the kids made a kid-friendly version of a lynch mob.
im never scared when I watch these, because theres no “under” to my bed, and theres okay a wall behind me. I realized too late that I probably should’ve checked “up.”
So the bullet baby story was probably supposed to be similar to a couple of stories that were popular awhile back where a person horrificly maims themself in response to something that would normally be a mild annoyance at worst, one where a person gouges their own eyes out due to having heterochromia and the other where a person shreds their inner ear on both sides due to the constant coughing and sniffling and chewing of their coworkers. The problem is that the person who wrote the bullet baby story seems to have missed the point, the horror is in the slow build up to the event that very clearly shows the character's build up to self mutilation and in the graphic detail of it when it finally happens.
I remember the eye-gouging one! It was called Symmetry; NDL Mongoose did a cool reading of it (since removed). iirc, the Symmetry protagonist had life-ruiningly-severe OCD
So the one where everyone dies from killing another person, I think its implying that it counts if you've butterfly effected someone into dying, like you do something, and then life Rube-Goldberg machined through a series of events accidentally causing someone else to die, you then die as well.
what they had to be specific about is "anyone who's killed *another human being* dies the same way as their victim" but because they didn't specify people, that includes anyone who's ever killed a bug, even if you didn't KNOW you killed the bug as you were walking down the sidewalk.
when addison said she was under my bed my immediate thought was like "u sure bout that? i havent vacuumed under there in a WHILE" there was this thing i heard when i was a kid, a rumor that there were 'albinos' in a certain public park in the city. it was implied that there were like, feral albino humans?? like living in the bushes or something??? but like. i just imagined like, white squirrels. there's black squirrels and theyre more common across the river so i always thought. albino squirrels in this park, yeah. there was also a cure for the bubonic plague back in the day that entailed strapping a chicken to the bubo. if the chicken died, it had sucked the sauce out and you were cured. if you died, you died. bubonic plague was actually the least lethal form of the plague.
Something funny is that technically Abigail was right about sex being the original sin. When Christianity first started out they actually didn't have as big of a stigma on sexual desires as they did now. That changed when Saint Augustine made his book "The Confessions" somewhere around 400 A.D.. It it he argued that because every human is inherently sinful due to Adam and Eve committing Original sin, and because we only exist because they had children, then that mean that sexual desire, and therefor sex, is sinful. This would then influence christian religions view on sexual desire leading to the stigma they have today. So technically Abigail was kind of right when she was a child.
my favorite nonsensical 2sh story i've ever read, just the epitome of all of the worst things on the subreddit: "My husband was not expecting any visitors today as we stayed at an isolated cabin during his day off from work. As soon as the doorbell rang, my husband went and looked through the peephole before an edged spear stabbed his eye and skull."
I came up with a hopefully not that bad one “On a whim, she googled her name, and found her very own Wikipedia page. Sure enough, it had a picture of her, her full name, date of birth… and date of death.”
51:16 My guess is that because some of the deaths require another person to do them, the wish keeps turning people into killers who also have to die. Like person A crashed their car into someone, so person B crashes into A, but now B also has to be crashed into for killing A and it just goes on like that.
51:47 I'm pretty sure the twist is that they didn't say "anyone who has killed **another human**", so now everyone on earth who has squished a spider or a fly or gone fishing or hunting is just dead edit: also i bet it might even apply to bacteria/germs, so people who have used hand sanitizer are also nuked by chemicals or something
The one about people who have killed dying the same death as their victims; the twist is that narrator didn't specify they had to be killers of humans OR they all had to be murdered, creating more murderers in an unending murder chain. I feel like both are equally plausible.
The spychic killer story would have worked way better if the second story was something like "I'm concerned that they they avoid my husband". It would not be good, but it would be less baffling!
I actually saw a video that mentioned something like the sandpaper room not too long ago. A concept of a torture device - the floor in that room is moving very slowly, but it also never stops so you have to keep moving too. You can never sleep because if you do you will eventually be pushed against a wall and then the moving floor will scrape open your skin. It would be scary to end up in a torture device like that - but as a two sentence horror story it falls flat.
The Diary of A Wimpy Kid one is most likely a two sentence horror story that is in reference to Ryan Grantham. He had a minor role in the movie as a small child, relatively recently [2020] he murdered his mother. He had a journal he wrote in plotting multiple different things including a plot to assassinate Justin Trudeau, and desires to become a serial killer. He was sentenced to life in prison last month, the reason that "The Diary of A Wimpy Kid" is relevant to this is due to the news referring to that role of his when talking about the news of what he did. [He played the kid who played a bush in the play within the movie.]
My best guess on the killed one is that they weren't specific in saying something like "anyone that's killed another human" so it included stuff like killing bugs and plants and stuff which nearly everyone has done intentionally or otherwise
Bullet baby: idk, maybe the baby's got the bullets and you're supposed to be scared by the fact that the bullet could go off. Edit: 31:30 Surprise brain haemorrhage needs to be some kind of dnd spell. I can just imagine: surprise brain haemorrhage: M,A Point ''wand'' at any enemy and tighten grip: deals 125 damage, consumes 1 metal and 1 gunpowder.
F for Peter Pan, also, it's kind of implied that Peter kills the Lost boys when they get bigger. The line is specifically that he thins them out when they stop fitting in the tree hide out. My initial take away was always that he like, literally stretches them so they're thinner or something, but the common take away is Peter Kills the Lost Boys, or banishes them, or gets rid of them in general. Someone might of commented this already. But comments are a nightmare to navigate on mobile.
51:10 they die the same way as their victim, who was murdered. That means someone had to murder them, and then someone else has to murder that person, ect.
The implications of Peter Pan killing the lost boys is based on a line in the book that he "thinned them out." Which is vague enough to mean anything so that's why a lot of people say he killed then.
41:30 i hate that this is almost a good story, but they had to named him DAVE, if it was something, "I made a deal with a demon to always win on card games, last night i kept losing to my mother, i excuse myself after the forth game, when i summon him to ask about this, he looked terrified"
The sandpaper room was a reference to a 4chan post about some guy inventing a new torture method, that being a room with a slowly-moving floor made of sandpaper
i think the implication of the "killers die like their victims" thing is its including animals as victims? but idk thats just how id do it if i was an evil genie.
51:42 I think the story is implying that since killers die the same way as their victims, it means they get killed. Which means the people who killed the killers also gets killed. Repeat until no one is alive anymore
The mention of distressing memes reminded me of this one scrub daddy meme where it starts with a girl talking about how good the scrub daddy is and then theres a hard cut to a slideshow of overused and destroyed scrub daddies with this absolutely horrifying rendition of amazing grace and it genuinely haunts me. The first time i saw it it made me feel so incredibly uneasy i almost cried
30:01 when someone said "bless you" to Prudence she got angry and said "how dare you" and then informed them that you need to say "curse you" to those of demonic origins
51:51 it should've been "As majority of the world's population was suddenly *flattened to death* I realized I should've been more specific." bc we've almost all stepped on at least one bug without realizing it during our lifetime
My wife just finished reading Peter Pan and distinctly remembers Pan “culling the herd” when boys came of edge. Like, she says that’s a quote from the text
She found the actual quote: “The boys on the island vary, of course, in numbers, according as they get killed and so on; and when they seem to be growing up, which is against the rules, Peter thins them out.”
"I'm going to do a southern accent for this one," she said. But when she opened her mouth to continue speaking, the voice that came out sounded exactly the same.
Dave the devil unfortunately suffered from crippling performance anxiety. He felt that paralyzing fear building within him when he saw the number of that card game mortal on his phone, knowing he would have to face another dissatisfied customer...
51:16 I think the implication is supposed to be that the speaker's wish came true by some means, but while they intended said wish to only effect people who'd killed maliciously (murderers, seriel killers, terrorists, etc) it also ended up effecting people who'd killed others by accident (car crashes, self-defense, potentially even things like their mother dying giving birth to them) and evidently, the effects were instantanious as such karmic deaths began happening as soon as the wish was spoken. Potentially then also creating an endless cycle of both purposeful murders and accidental killings wherein more people were compelled by whatever wish magic caused it to come true to become the cause of another's death, thus warrenting them to also die in the same fashion, and thus sentencing yet another to death as someone else was then compelled to do the same to them, so on and so forth until either everone was dead or the only people left managed to stay alive solely because everyone around them was already dead. Except, of course, if you again take into consideration the dying in childbirth being considered one such manner of a killer and a victim, which... I'm going to let you read into the potential implications of if you so wish. So like. It's not well executed, and I don't think it's befitting of two sentences, but the idea is kind of there.
"I finally found you guys!" I said running up to my friends happily. As I look at their horrified faces, I think they regret that hide and seek game on the cliffs.
I’m so glad that “Guso Milkerella” has just consistently been Gus’ name on the channel since the disturbing movie iceberg. Big fan of David the demon. I’ll turn to him in the future for all of my black Jack related problems.
F for Peter Pan W for Bears Addison is wrong about Peter Pan I was the Albino Child (that was screaming to be untied) Condiment Creature sequel Bubo Pit
Yet another hour of diregentleman and friends to add to my gaming background noise list!! I know for sure I'll be coming back to this one again and again.
A priest is speaking: While I was performing an exorcism on a little girl, the demon told me he was actually protecting her from a monster worse than he was, so I gave him permission to leave the child's body and possess the monster instead. Imagine my surprise when the girl's father crept in while he thought I was sleeping, and the demon instantly possessed him.
Well, of course the albino child would scream if they had just been assaulted and tied up by other children. The other children though thought they screamed because of the sunlight.
I signed onto the Patreon and enjoyed many of the podcasts there. Thank you for making so much fun things to listen to. Had laughs with the bad two sentence horro stories. I look forward to seeing more Helluva boss, Spongebob Boys or Two professional writers if you're all still interested in making them.
Bullet Baby was confirmed in the comments of the subreddit as being a zombie fetus trying to eat itself out of a pregnant woman. Author just didn't know the word fetus and had a hard time getting it across.
How did the Baby get bit, or where they patient zero?
So why was the Gun unloaded?
Most boring explanation: The gun was unloaded b/c it ran out of bullets after shooting other zombocoms, and the pregnant woman passed along her infection to the bullet baby before the pov character noticed anything
I like how the author 1: didn’t know the word fetus and 2: was bad at getting their point across in such few words. It’s like they shouldn’t be writing a two sentence horror story about a thing they didn’t know the word for.
@@llewelynshingler2173 misfire, not unloaded.
The whole video was actually a two sentence horror story, they just used a LOT of commas
Because run on sentences are the scariest thing imaginable to writers.
@@manskronqvist2537 Yvonne Nicole Brown's line from Community is always in my head when my sentences get long: "They should've called him the Run-On Sentence Bandit!"
An run on sentences with grammar error, wrong tenses, and wrong place semi-colons
Some of these commas sound an awful lot like question marks
As well as a healthy dose of semicolons and emdashes
Not far in yet, but so far my favorite two sentence horror story is when Addison said "Stop blinking. They're not going to save you".
Yeah it gives such a clear image of some guy blinking in morse code , and their captors noticing ...
@@davidegaruti2582that one "blinking at my waiter in Morse code" song
@@bluchismooni know this is very late now but that song is "red flags"
In the mass death one, I feel like it would've come across a lot better if the second sentence was something like "As a boot descended from the sky, I realized I should've been more specific."
That's a good take on it. Bug victims.
My dumb take on it (in putting myself in the mindset of the author) was the author was doing a veganism thing.
In my case, a giant rubber spatula would smash me into the ground.
That's what I was thinkin too
Didn’t kill it, but I legit almost ran over a squirrel on my bicycle before it finally darted away at the last minute. In this hypothetical scenario I would be clotheslined by a fucking bike tire out of nowhere and that idea is sending me rn
I thought it was that if you’ve eaten, hunted, picked, cut down anything (plants are living organisms too) you count as a killer. So everyone was dying
41:12 "After seeing her eyes turn black I excused myself to the toilet and summoned Dave, but he seemed as terrified as I was."
All I can picture is this guy stepping into the bathroom, cupping his hands around his mouth, and yelling into the toilet, "HEY, DAVE!!!"
*water rushes into the bowl, revealing Dave's face, Floo-Network-style* "Yeees?"
As a father of a child who chews like a monster, that story makes so much sense.
I’m sure you’re a good enough parent to keep the bullets in your gun and out of the reach of your hungry baby though.
@@The5lacker But the little bastard just loves his .357! How am I supposed to say no to that face?
Have you tried having the kid teethe on a bullet? 😂
Two Sentence horror story:
Netflix announced a Less is Morgue adaptation. They've made all the characters straight.
I hate that you even spoke this into the world. We must never let this happen.
@@yourlocalnerd7788 Sent a shiver down your spine, though, didn't it?
Don't worry, it'll never happen. Netflix couldn't risk a headline that says "Netflix to adapt story by the creators of Monster Girl Safari"
@@DarkExcalibur42 Netflix should just adapt monster girl safari
Therapist: Cis Riley isn’t real, she can’t hurt you
Cis Riley:
@@DarkExcalibur42: Also, they can't do that shit without the permission of the creators. That's the whole point of IP, you can't adapt something you don't have the rights to.
51:52 pretty sure this story is trying to say that if you killed anything, *EVER* (bugs, plants, germs, etc), you would die the same way (crushed, dehydrated, etc)
I came here to comment the exact same thing.
Also by that logic, most people have made multiple kills via different methods. What happens to you then? You can only die once, surely
@@pringlebatch everything combined.
my least favorite sub-genre are the ones where the twist amounts to "...and then x real-life historical tragedy happened."
They're my least favourite for actual spooks but I think their the best for unintentional comedy, mainly cause the author had to give enough details so we can guess which tragedy it is.
Just picturing the author furiously looking up the exact hour it happened, just so they can break narrative flow with copy pasted dates and times gives me a chuckle.
@@peppyboi9710 "Have a good August 9th, 1945, 11:01 Japanese Standard Time, " I told my beautiful wife and three children. I'm so glad to live in the beautiful Urikami Valley area of Nagasaki.
@@robinthereanimator5400 perfection.
It's like the two sentence horror story version of that Robert Pattinson movie that ends with 9/11
@@bluchismoonremember me?
okay I think the "anyone who's killed dies the same way as their victim" one is implying they should've specified anyone who's killed other humans? the vibe I got was like anyone who's ever stepped on a bug is getting spontaneously crushed or something like that
Yeah same, but then it's weird the protag doesn't die. If that's what they wanted for the reveal they should have been squashed by something
I thought it meant that anyone who dropped bombs during a war had bombs dropped on them and therefore everyone around them
@@didnt_ask_for_handle guy is living the consumerist buddist lifestyle. has never taken a life personally. thats what butchers are for
Perhaps my favorite idea to come from this episode is that the trees have the ability to wage war, presumably also some form of government in order to be capable of declaring war, a whole tree society, and they WAITED for people to develop the technology to talk to trees before they immediately declared war, like they have such respect for international law they will literally just let the amazon be cut down until humans made it possible to formally declare war instead of just day-of-the-triffids-ing them.
This makes it so much funnier
They may not be able to read but they’ll be DAMNED if they don’t follow the Geneva Conventions
My least favourite subgenre of r/twosentencehorror story are the ones where “The EpiPen Don’t Work” is the twist. I’m including the inhaler one under that umbrella.
Even aside from the IP creep the pinnochio one is awful because it wouldn’t be a lie if he didn’t know there was an intruder
Like that tumblr post thinking that they could use pinocchio to answer existential questions as if a wooden boy brought to life would know *anything*
good point. lies require intent, so if you legitimately believe something false you aren’t lying, you’re just wrong.
Sekiro had a good two sentence horror story:
"Turn back if you value your life, you can't behead the headless.
Our swords and pikes did nothing."
They should have mentioned that the headless guy rips your soul out of your ass.
@@abyssGazerTV Beware to all those whose cheeks are not clenched.
From your ass, your soul shall be wrenched...
Once you are seen, there is no escape.
*It cannot even be touched.*
I like to think that the father fully loaded his revolver but by bending reality the baby managed to put those bullets in its mouth, and now the father can never escape his responsibility to take care of the bullet baby
"Saucy buboes" is a combination of words I would never have anticipated but lord is it hysterical
Two sentence horror:
" 'For sale: Pickle serum, never used' , read the sign. I munched my disappointing sandwish, and imagined the posibilities. "
Does the sandwish grant wishes when you bite into it? 😜
The "Everyone who has killed" story includes animals. That's what they should have been specific about. Now everyone who's ever killed a fly are dropping like flies.
I thought it was like
If you stabbed someone to death
Then someone would stab you to death
Then that someone would be stabbed to death
Oh I thought it was about people whose mom died in childbirth...
So they should have put "as millions got splatted like mosquitoes , i realized i should have been more specific"
I thought it was about sperm
I thought that it meant if someone killed someone else, they would die the same way (killed by someone /else/) leading to mass murder chains
i was the albino child left alone in the sun for hours. no really i actually have albinism lmao - thanks for the correcting of misinfo and mentioning the very real violence ppl with albinism face in certain countries, genuinely, it’s appreciated. :) ❤
Ur so cool
@@evergarden8592 thanks! c:
A big plus being an albino is that it's easier for you to cosplay Elric of Melnibone or almost any Targaryen.
There are some medical conditions that cause sensitivity to the sun, some can be very severe. There's also Giant Hogweed which creates a sensitivity to the sun, causing blisters in reaction to exposure to the sun. None of these are albinism.
@@chelseaatherton9813 i’m. confused? are you saying that albinism doesn’t cause sensitivity to the sun?
I’m glad that Dave the Devil was forced to reckon with just how small he is within the supernatural realms.
Clearly dave scales to meat worm, but would easily be defeated by moms machete.
There are great Kings and Presidents in Hell, who command terrible legions and bring ruin to nations. Dave is lower management in a Hell Fuck Factory. He’s microscopic.
@@severalcakes3267 the concept of her becoming a democracy is really funny to me.
"Dave, what's going on?"
"Don't look at me bro, she is not from my hell."
She comes from a different scar-ea code.
@@peppyboi9710 And that pun Just killed my liver. Thanks.
I feel like the common problem is that these writers are trying to write a story that can't fit in two sentences so it ends up being an abomination of strange endings and plot points that only made sense in the writer's head. Maybe they should have wrote a short story.
The infant daughter story is just a new origin for Matter-Eater Lad.
Trans matter-eater lad
matter baby...
@@bepisthescienceman4202 They ate their own gender.
@@danemr6808 i mean, what else do you do with it
@@danemr6808 Mmmm! Savory, soft, and delicious on the outside, with just the right amount of crunch on the inside. 😉
Home invasion stuff is super freaky to me, so that incorrect password got me. I remember reading another one a few years ago that went along the lines of:
"Every night before bed, I close and lock the window to my room.
And every morning, I do the exact same thing."
My room at the time had a window that would have been really easy to break into if someone was so inclined, so that probably heightened the fear for me.
The tree war one reminds me of a single sentence i read once that always makes my imagination race
"The rocks are quiet because the trees are listening."
And although it is not strictly a horror thing, it is much more eerie than that tree war thing could ever be
it took me a while to realize Buboe wasn't an odd way of saying boobie or boobah
Same honestly.
Saucy tits...
Dito
ok, im gonna regret asking this, but... what does it mean?
@@standardhuman8675 Diseased, puss-filled sores that are symptoms of the bubonic plague
I've got a two-sentence horror story:
As I put the disc into the DVD player and sat down in my chair, the most unspeakable thing appeared on the screen which shocked me to the core.
"You have attempted to play a Divx disc in a DVD player not equipped with the Divx feature."
The albino child one actually kinda works. The idea is that the kids saw a normal albino child, thought he was a vampire, tied him up and attacked him, which made him start screaming. It was sunny out, so the kids thought that was why he was screaming.The horror comes from realizing the kids made a kid-friendly version of a lynch mob.
Holy shit, you have never met a child
@@tVt2000 You know what, fair. You’re right.
How is it kid friendly?
@@tell-me-a-story- Eh, I listened to creepypasta as a kid. Let the next generation be traumatized.
@@tell-me-a-story-It's hate a child can understand and violence a child can partake in.
The delivery of "1,000 YEARS DUNGEON" made me lose my shit honestly
Maybe the horror of Bullet Baby is that it is incomprehensible
if the gift wrapped baby story did involve a teenager I could see it being the start to a more surreal version of Labyrinth
Instead of David Bowie it’s just a confused cps agent
7:51 I believe the story is that the parent picked up the dummy/toy gun for the child and the child is chewing on the actual one.
im never scared when I watch these, because theres no “under” to my bed, and theres okay a wall behind me. I realized too late that I probably should’ve checked “up.”
So the bullet baby story was probably supposed to be similar to a couple of stories that were popular awhile back where a person horrificly maims themself in response to something that would normally be a mild annoyance at worst, one where a person gouges their own eyes out due to having heterochromia and the other where a person shreds their inner ear on both sides due to the constant coughing and sniffling and chewing of their coworkers. The problem is that the person who wrote the bullet baby story seems to have missed the point, the horror is in the slow build up to the event that very clearly shows the character's build up to self mutilation and in the graphic detail of it when it finally happens.
I remember the eye-gouging one! It was called Symmetry; NDL Mongoose did a cool reading of it (since removed). iirc, the Symmetry protagonist had life-ruiningly-severe OCD
Apparently, it was a zombie apocalypse scenario, where they were a pregnant woman and had just been bit.
35:47 The funniest part about this story is the kid enthusiatically calling a teacher "mommy"
i knew a kid in my second grade class who was the child of our teacher, so it's not as unheard of as you might think
I thought the child was talking to their mum after school, and the school had sent letters out to the parents, which happens sometimes.
Ooh, I've missed these. Clearly all the sacrifices to Dave were worth it.
Bullet Baby: She’s pregnant and it’s chewing itself out.
Edit: F for Peter Pan
You're not an Infant until you're born though?
@@pinkliongaming8769 Maybe it was chewing as it was being born?
@@pinkliongaming8769 The writer confirmed in the comments that they didn't know the word "fetus"
"I love going to new summer camps!" i said
"Too bad sorry, what a same" said Serial Killer Andy
So the one where everyone dies from killing another person, I think its implying that it counts if you've butterfly effected someone into dying, like you do something, and then life Rube-Goldberg machined through a series of events accidentally causing someone else to die, you then die as well.
A Rube-Goldberg machine is a
I assumed killing insects & vermin counted, since they didn't specify killing a *person*
This is the third explanation I've read in these comments.
what they had to be specific about is "anyone who's killed *another human being* dies the same way as their victim" but because they didn't specify people, that includes anyone who's ever killed a bug, even if you didn't KNOW you killed the bug as you were walking down the sidewalk.
when addison said she was under my bed my immediate thought was like "u sure bout that? i havent vacuumed under there in a WHILE"
there was this thing i heard when i was a kid, a rumor that there were 'albinos' in a certain public park in the city. it was implied that there were like, feral albino humans?? like living in the bushes or something??? but like. i just imagined like, white squirrels. there's black squirrels and theyre more common across the river so i always thought. albino squirrels in this park, yeah.
there was also a cure for the bubonic plague back in the day that entailed strapping a chicken to the bubo. if the chicken died, it had sucked the sauce out and you were cured. if you died, you died. bubonic plague was actually the least lethal form of the plague.
Something funny is that technically Abigail was right about sex being the original sin. When Christianity first started out they actually didn't have as big of a stigma on sexual desires as they did now. That changed when Saint Augustine made his book "The Confessions" somewhere around 400 A.D.. It it he argued that because every human is inherently sinful due to Adam and Eve committing Original sin, and because we only exist because they had children, then that mean that sexual desire, and therefor sex, is sinful. This would then influence christian religions view on sexual desire leading to the stigma they have today. So technically Abigail was kind of right when she was a child.
This was a fantastic video to watch while eating dinner. Nothing gross in this at all
55:24
The way this one's written implies that Neil Armstrong is also wearing a suit as he's being dangled over the Earth's edge
Yeah, a _space_ suit.
my favorite nonsensical 2sh story i've ever read, just the epitome of all of the worst things on the subreddit:
"My husband was not expecting any visitors today as we stayed at an isolated cabin during his day off from work. As soon as the doorbell rang, my husband went and looked through the peephole before an edged spear stabbed his eye and skull."
24:39 “I haven’t even had my cup of apple blood yet.”
“Do you mean apple juice?”
“No.”
I came up with a hopefully not that bad one
“On a whim, she googled her name, and found her very own Wikipedia page. Sure enough, it had a picture of her, her full name, date of birth… and date of death.”
I’ll have you know that this had me saying, “Ooooohh,” out loud /Genuine
Modern ghosts have it rough
you guys should try your hand at Third Sentence Happy! find a bunch of two sentence horror (good or bad) and add a 3rd sentence to make it happy
51:16 My guess is that because some of the deaths require another person to do them, the wish keeps turning people into killers who also have to die. Like person A crashed their car into someone, so person B crashes into A, but now B also has to be crashed into for killing A and it just goes on like that.
51:47 I'm pretty sure the twist is that they didn't say "anyone who has killed **another human**", so now everyone on earth who has squished a spider or a fly or gone fishing or hunting is just dead
edit: also i bet it might even apply to bacteria/germs, so people who have used hand sanitizer are also nuked by chemicals or something
The one about people who have killed dying the same death as their victims; the twist is that narrator didn't specify they had to be killers of humans OR they all had to be murdered, creating more murderers in an unending murder chain.
I feel like both are equally plausible.
The spychic killer story would have worked way better if the second story was something like "I'm concerned that they they avoid my husband".
It would not be good, but it would be less baffling!
And that babies name was Stewie Griffin.
The Bullet Baby bit and “The New Testament is the patch” made me burst out laughing, thank you
I actually saw a video that mentioned something like the sandpaper room not too long ago. A concept of a torture device - the floor in that room is moving very slowly, but it also never stops so you have to keep moving too. You can never sleep because if you do you will eventually be pushed against a wall and then the moving floor will scrape open your skin. It would be scary to end up in a torture device like that - but as a two sentence horror story it falls flat.
I’m ready to have the very depth of my bones rattled
bullet baby is a boss baby AU where instead of being a ceo your new brother is agent 47
This feels like the same energy as Drawfee.
Nice first video fo watch from this channel, I like it already.
The Diary of A Wimpy Kid one is most likely a two sentence horror story that is in reference to Ryan Grantham. He had a minor role in the movie as a small child, relatively recently [2020] he murdered his mother. He had a journal he wrote in plotting multiple different things including a plot to assassinate Justin Trudeau, and desires to become a serial killer. He was sentenced to life in prison last month, the reason that "The Diary of A Wimpy Kid" is relevant to this is due to the news referring to that role of his when talking about the news of what he did. [He played the kid who played a bush in the play within the movie.]
the bullet baby was eating the WHOLE revolver. the click was her teeth, the gun was already dysfunctional
My best guess on the killed one is that they weren't specific in saying something like "anyone that's killed another human" so it included stuff like killing bugs and plants and stuff which nearly everyone has done intentionally or otherwise
As someone with Misophinia I too would shoot myself over chewing noises
Yeah, it's misphonia drive vs parental instinct. Can't hurt baby. Have to delete brain.
@@rykx0r impromptu DIY lobotomy.
Bullet baby: idk, maybe the baby's got the bullets and you're supposed to be scared by the fact that the bullet could go off.
Edit: 31:30 Surprise brain haemorrhage needs to be some kind of dnd spell.
I can just imagine: surprise brain haemorrhage: M,A
Point ''wand'' at any enemy and tighten grip: deals 125 damage, consumes 1 metal and 1 gunpowder.
How would it go off? Spontaneous Bullet Combustion?
@@Dragonatrix They use the bullet as a pretend hammer, they bite the percussion cap very hard, they hold it near a radiator, etc.
I think the "I wish anyone who has killed dies" one means that it includes people who have killed bugs, plants and animals and stuff
F for Peter Pan, also, it's kind of implied that Peter kills the Lost boys when they get bigger.
The line is specifically that he thins them out when they stop fitting in the tree hide out.
My initial take away was always that he like, literally stretches them so they're thinner or something, but the common take away is Peter Kills the Lost Boys, or banishes them, or gets rid of them in general.
Someone might of commented this already. But comments are a nightmare to navigate on mobile.
51:10 they die the same way as their victim, who was murdered. That means someone had to murder them, and then someone else has to murder that person, ect.
The implications of Peter Pan killing the lost boys is based on a line in the book that he "thinned them out." Which is vague enough to mean anything so that's why a lot of people say he killed then.
41:30 i hate that this is almost a good story, but they had to named him DAVE, if it was something, "I made a deal with a demon to always win on card games, last night i kept losing to my mother, i excuse myself after the forth game, when i summon him to ask about this, he looked terrified"
The sandpaper room was a reference to a 4chan post about some guy inventing a new torture method, that being a room with a slowly-moving floor made of sandpaper
i think the implication of the "killers die like their victims" thing is its including animals as victims? but idk thats just how id do it if i was an evil genie.
Truly the Bear community comes from a fine pedigree
51:42
I think the story is implying that since killers die the same way as their victims, it means they get killed. Which means the people who killed the killers also gets killed. Repeat until no one is alive anymore
The mention of distressing memes reminded me of this one scrub daddy meme where it starts with a girl talking about how good the scrub daddy is and then theres a hard cut to a slideshow of overused and destroyed scrub daddies with this absolutely horrifying rendition of amazing grace and it genuinely haunts me. The first time i saw it it made me feel so incredibly uneasy i almost cried
30:01 when someone said "bless you" to Prudence she got angry and said "how dare you" and then informed them that you need to say "curse you" to those of demonic origins
51:51 it should've been "As majority of the world's population was suddenly *flattened to death* I realized I should've been more specific."
bc we've almost all stepped on at least one bug without realizing it during our lifetime
1.) Bullet baby is imprisoning her own father in a purgatory
2) The dad wanted to end his life but didn't want his baby to die.
OHMYGOD I’ve been waiting for the sequel!!! I just finished my final exams this could not have come at a better time 😭😭
40:27 Brandon by the end of the movie would've looked at this story and been like "pssh, I can do worse"
My wife just finished reading Peter Pan and distinctly remembers Pan “culling the herd” when boys came of edge. Like, she says that’s a quote from the text
She found the actual quote:
“The boys on the island vary, of course, in numbers, according as they get killed and so on; and when they seem to be growing up, which is against the rules, Peter thins them out.”
52:00 I think since they didn’t specify human victims so anyone who has killed any living creature is dying
f for peter pan, w for bears, heed the sirens call, addison is wrong about peter pan, heed the sirens call
"I'm going to do a southern accent for this one," she said. But when she opened her mouth to continue speaking, the voice that came out sounded exactly the same.
Dave the devil unfortunately suffered from crippling performance anxiety. He felt that paralyzing fear building within him when he saw the number of that card game mortal on his phone, knowing he would have to face another dissatisfied customer...
51:16 I think the implication is supposed to be that the speaker's wish came true by some means, but while they intended said wish to only effect people who'd killed maliciously (murderers, seriel killers, terrorists, etc) it also ended up effecting people who'd killed others by accident (car crashes, self-defense, potentially even things like their mother dying giving birth to them) and evidently, the effects were instantanious as such karmic deaths began happening as soon as the wish was spoken. Potentially then also creating an endless cycle of both purposeful murders and accidental killings wherein more people were compelled by whatever wish magic caused it to come true to become the cause of another's death, thus warrenting them to also die in the same fashion, and thus sentencing yet another to death as someone else was then compelled to do the same to them, so on and so forth until either everone was dead or the only people left managed to stay alive solely because everyone around them was already dead. Except, of course, if you again take into consideration the dying in childbirth being considered one such manner of a killer and a victim, which... I'm going to let you read into the potential implications of if you so wish.
So like. It's not well executed, and I don't think it's befitting of two sentences, but the idea is kind of there.
I was under the impression he should have specified ( human victims) instead everyone is getting crushed like every insect they've ever swatted
@@thomasoneill9402 could be either or both. This was just where my mind went first.
10:54 this is literally the plot of dead by daylight but with two sentence horror stories
1:01:56
This weeks episode: the writers barely disguised fetish
I love recording these it’s like Christmas morning!
You three woke up and choose violence for these video, I love it
The goth kids have fallen, Christmas has arrived.
You mean Chirstmas morning?
"I finally found you guys!" I said running up to my friends happily. As I look at their horrified faces, I think they regret that hide and seek game on the cliffs.
One of the best Videos on this channel finally gets a sequel.
I came to a confessional to tell the priest my sins. By the time I was done, he was dead.
I’m so glad that “Guso Milkerella” has just consistently been Gus’ name on the channel since the disturbing movie iceberg.
Big fan of David the demon. I’ll turn to him in the future for all of my black Jack related problems.
The K-drama Gus talks about here is called _Hellbound,_ by the way.
15:22 i'm so glad i'm not the only one who noticed this and hates it lmao
bullet baby: maybe??? baby is zombie?? idk i have no clue but this is my only genuine idea as of what it could be.
F for Peter Pan
W for Bears
Addison is wrong about Peter Pan
I was the Albino Child (that was screaming to be untied)
Condiment Creature sequel
Bubo Pit
Yet another hour of diregentleman and friends to add to my gaming background noise list!! I know for sure I'll be coming back to this one again and again.
51:40 Ever swatted a fly? Splat. Ever taken antibiotics? Oh darn...
"anyone who has killed" doesn't specify humans.
A priest is speaking: While I was performing an exorcism on a little girl, the demon told me he was actually protecting her from a monster worse than he was, so I gave him permission to leave the child's body and possess the monster instead. Imagine my surprise when the girl's father crept in while he thought I was sleeping, and the demon instantly possessed him.
Well, of course the albino child would scream if they had just been assaulted and tied up by other children. The other children though thought they screamed because of the sunlight.
I signed onto the Patreon and enjoyed many of the podcasts there. Thank you for making so much fun things to listen to.
Had laughs with the bad two sentence horro stories.
I look forward to seeing more Helluva boss, Spongebob Boys or Two professional writers if you're all still interested in making them.
29:00
WAIT IT'S ACTUALLY NOT THE ORIGNIAL SIN? What the heck is it then
11:05 literally the plot to nightbooks