Detransition Update. Surgery, coming home to myself and realising the value of my life
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 1 ต.ค. 2024
- In this video I talk about my upcoming mastectomy, transition, detransition , clarity , surgery and I also talk about my own progress of gradually healing complex trauma and really coming home to a once unimaginable sense of self worth and self value.
My blog and contact. sam-kaye.com/
I was baptized and became a Christian as a baby, but it made me a target of Satan. Satan tried to destroy me all of my life but by the grace of God, I managed to survive. As a child, I was neglected, sexually abused by caregivers, physically and mentally abused by my parents and other family members. I can get depressed from time to time, but Jesus has filled me with such love for my own family and for all people. I can even forgive people who hurt me. It has taken me decades, but it is possible with God's help to be healed.
Wow. So glad for you. Came across this by chance and feel very moved by the progress of your personal journey, having watched some of your earlier videos as Maya. This is the outcome I'd always hoped for you.
As a retired therapist I am so dismayed by the way my former profession has abandoned its responsibilty to help all clients to explore themselves, including those suffering gender dysphoria. By the way they've caved to gender ideology instead of practising exploratory psychotherapy. It feels like a betrayal of ourselves and our profession.
I used to live in Oxfordshire and I loved the poem too.
A person's hands are so expressive of them. You have beautiful, strong male hands whatever happened to the rest of you. You can always raise your hands, like in the poem.
How right you are, health is about the ability to love and to reach beyond the self. Bravo
HI Erica. You're the second person that has mentioned my hands recently. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.. It was lovely to see your comment, it's been a while.
@@Call-Me-Sam stay away from religions. Stay away from politics. Stay away from pseudo/false sciences. IT is time for you to WAKE UP!!!!!!!!!!
The bit you say about sex at 17 minutes is significant and I appreciate this. I tried to tell my then husband exactly this when he made the decision to have surgery in 1996. He dated only 1 man, I heard from a friend. He's now married to a woman and calls himself a lesbian. She tolerates that artifice, I guess. I also see your maleness in your shoulders and hands. For me, you wouldn't have passed. The departure from a self-involved mindset will give you spirituality and wisdom. You will really help others. I am sure. @@Call-Me-Sam
hi Sam. my name is Luke. i just started my detransitioning process because of what i feel like was a culmination of encounters with God. it is really amazing to see someone who is also MTFTM. i liked seeing your recommendation on julian of norwich. i think i will give it a read.
Hi Luke. For me to heal, detransition was essential, a return to the male I was and always have been. There, is stability and the truthful discovery of self in relationship with Source/God. I think our form is symbolic of something before form, essence, spirit ? and that is truth and cannot be changed Looking at all the changes I have been through nothing really changed for the better, it was all a diversion that took me away from the truth of what and who I am.
There are many painful lessons in life and this was one of the most painful paths to walk.
I wish you well in your own discovery.
By removing your male body parts you were freeing yourself from the horror that came with being a male. Such trauma you have been through to finally realise that being male was not the problem, but that another sick human was!
I'm so sorry for the loss of your manhood. I pray that detransitioning will bring you all the peace your heart deserves. ❤
One of my favorite things about your videos is how much they promote a desire to love and have compassion for all people. We all, regardless of our background, faults and history and pain owe it to other human beings to have respect and compassion for them. So often we scrunch our nose at others different than ourselves ( especially who sin differently than we do) but in reality we are the the same, flawed human beings with various history, strengths, weaknesses all loved by God and created for unique purposes to serve Him in the world. Every time I see your videos I see more of more how much we are the same and much less we are different. There are people in the world I could never reach or impact that only you can and I believe there are people you were created to impact who have either received or are awaiting the blessings only you can bring and nothing you have ever been through that lead to the special man you are today will be in vain. God always has a plan for good, we only have to trust Him and surrender.
Thank you so much. Yes, I agree, we are all flawed and as the " civilised " world becomes more complex, those flaws also become more complex. We respond to our environment, the ideas and normalisation of disturbing currents make it easier to come to the truth . When the complexity feels such a distortion of truth, it's a relief to accept God. Truth , morality, love, rightness, all synonyms for God.
God shows me great patience as I stumble toward surrender .
You are becoming a very wise man. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you
what a beautiful soul you have. i'm very glad i found this channel. i've only seen a handful of your vids so far but have got something meaningful out of every single one. very much appreciated, God bless you Sam.
Thanks so much for letting me know Karl. As someone who lives with the consequences of complex trauma, self doubt and self criticism are persistent, some would say , " hard wired " , so just to know that what I share matters to others, really gives me a sense that I am doing something of value for others who have also suffered.
Dear Sam you've inspired me with you courage more than you will every k ow in my darkness, in a world where being true to oneself in each new moment is mostly not honored or wecolcomed 😔😌 To be authentic is part of this journey yes?! I hold you in my heart while you go through the actioning of the next unfolding, pealing away to reach the authentic you as you awaking to what and who that is every moment. I hold you in the light 🕯️Deep Graditude for your continued sharing and being another human being I can relate to as we walk each other Home. 🚶♀️🚶♂️🤗
Bless you Jo. Thank you so much . I wish you well in your own healing and growth.
@@Call-Me-Sam 🙏
@@Call-Me-Sam As humans, we must hurt in order to heal. Avoiding the pain or denying it only leads to more dysfunction. I think in balanced, integrated person we have to face the truth and the reality of ourselves and accept all aspects. Denying something causes it to get stronger and stronger until the entire focus of their existence becomes about denying it. Healing requires the acknowledgment of these things.
Healthy means balanced. Unhealthy is imbalanced. Most of us have things about ourselves that we don't like or don't want to accept. These things often disrupt our lives in some way or another. We may be uncomfortable with them and seek to hide them from others. We may be ashamed of them or angry about them. The more imbalanced the situation is, the more unhealthy a person will be. If someone is so uncomfortable with these things about themselves that they deny or ignore them, they will become more and more unhealthy. They may be paranoid, irritable, unpleasant and generally miserable.. Denying and demonizing aspects of ourselves to the point that they cannot accept it - or ourselves means we cannot be balanced and it can lead to horrible, painful dysfunction that results when we cannot integrate the different parts of ourselves into a cohesive, whole self.
It's hard to build true self-worth until we engender acceptance of ourselves. Denial. Instead of fixing the problem, actually reinforces it and makes it worse. I think one of the most valuable lessons we can learn in life is the importance of living authentically and being honest with ourselves. Yes, accepting things can be painful. However, what we don't accept, we cannot change or heal, and what we deny eventually ends up running our lives. Be honest with yourself and face the struggle. Change is never easy but it can be so worth it. Honesty is the first step. When we face the Shadow and we accept it, we master it and we can use it for healing. Doing Shadow work is painful and scary, but it is necessary for balance. And balance is where we find peace.
It's sad, I don't think I've heard of a transexual or detransitioner who didn't have severe trauma. Hope society can find a way to recognise trauma in people and have non-surgical methods of helping. I wish you well.❤
Thank you.
Detransitioners were never trans, but confused and did not get the mental health they needed.
Just because some people make this mistake, does not mean that true gender dysphoria does not exist. For many, medical treatment is the cure.
But yes at the moment there seems to be a trend that so many people believe they now have this very rare condition of transsexualism - which is real and supported by medical evidence as a neurological condition.
Hi Sam,
I've only seen a few of your videos and most of them were more current. But I'm glad I got to see this one as well. I don't face the struggles you have had to face, but as we all do, I have different struggles. I have never been aware of people de-transitioning before I started watching your channel. You've taught me a lot and I thank you for showing me a different side to this situation. Your compassion and gentle spirit heals far beyond trans issues. I am forever grateful to have come into your acquaintance. May the Lord continue to bless and keep you as you are blessing others.❤
By speaking up you have given young people information they need that may save them a great deal of pain. Thank you !
"I have to live with what I've done." Man, that has resounded in my head over and over and over ad infinitum. I just found you tonight, and I can't get enough. Your truth...your introspection...your..."you-ness" is just so appealing. You speak to the little girl in me who is so lacking in care and honesty and simple truth (is truth EVER simple?) Thank you for being you...for sharing, and for speaking past your fear. Your vulnerability is magnetic for someone like me. My whole life is built on artifice and a carefully curated "online personality", and I find your honesty and the lack of bullshit so appealing. I watched your latest video directly before this one, and I'm hooked on your honesty. I'll just be over here binge-watching and maybe shedding a few (stupid) tears....petting my sweet dogs (and my Devil-kittens) in-between to keep me grounded. I'm going to hang on to, "it's never too late to come back..."
Although irreversible decisions have been made, it's profound to see the courageous strength, vulnerability, and truth you exemplify. Thank you for being you and for being true, Sam. It does not go unseen.
Thank you so much Marko
@@Call-Me-Sam No, no. Thank youuuu, Sam. ❤️
I wonder where you would have been if you never transitioned ? The same level of wisdom & insight ?
I can only give thanks for the insight & wisdom you passed on to me.
How good is your life now ? Pretty good I imagine.
You rock Sam !
Thanks Kirsten. Yes, I don't think life would have gone the same way if I hadn't transitioned. I was not in a good way and transition gave me a reason to be but also was a hiding place. A new chapter is opening.
I hope you are well. X
@@Call-Me-Sam Namaste , I am well & family is well,
@@kirsteneklund2509 Thats good to hear.
It’s so important for Mothers to wholeheartedly protect and saturate their boys with love in the first 7 years of life. The “teaching them to be men” shouldn’t even come into it until much later. And when I say Mothers I mean Mothers. Sam, you look a bit like Ian Brown x
Everything you have been through in your life has made you who you are today, and who you are today is astonishing and wonderful. In your healing, you are healing others. If it’s any comfort to you, I see your manliness shinning through from inside and also on the outside including your manly hands. You are attractive. Walk in the dignity that God gave you, and may He continue to walk with you and give you peace.
Thank you again, Sam. It's such a privilege in various ways to listen to and observe your healing, wisdom and growth.
In this video, from a year ago you describe yourself as a fairly feminine man. I have to tell you again, I think you overstate that. To survive you learned to put on femininity, and you are rapidly unlearning that. You were already then (a year ago) so much less "feminine" than a year before that. And now you don't strike me as feminine at all.
You refer here to cosmetic surgeries to your face. I don't know what you looked like before those surgeries, but to my eye it's pretty much down to the lack of whiskers, or a five o/clock shadow, the large eyeglasses, smacking of lips occasionally at the end of a sentence. Not much else. And your recent videos show Sam, a man, full stop. NOT androgynous, not a feminine man.
Of course, I and perhaps others wonder why you see no benefit in a phalloplasty and testosterone, topics which you've raised elsewhere. Imagining myself in that situation, I think I'd want those. You have no obligation to explain, but this seems counter-intuitive.
Truly, I ask about not out of crude curiosity but because I'm drawn into your experience by the poignancy, honestly and eloquence of what you share.
thank you.
I don't want to go through any more scarring surgery and phalloplasty is equally as false as vaginoplasty . After so many years, physically I'm comfortable as I am. After decades of imbalance I do now take a small dose of Testosterone and a small dose of Oestrogen , this feels balanced .
Re my appearance, some see me as you do, a male, others still comment that I very much look female, I tend not to get involved in how I am perceived or which pronouns people use when the speak to me .
@@Call-Me-Sam Thanks for explaining, Sam.
Please forgive me for objecting to the logic of part of your answer, though I cannot object to your decision, nor to your reluctance to experience further surgery.
1. In a sense a phalloplasty would be "false" (but it really cannot be compared with the vaginoplasty because the latter was meant to repudiate your nature, while a phalloplasty, whatever its limitations, would be meant to affirm it.
So, whatever the two procedures may have in common, they are opposites in their intent.
2. I find it very hard to believe that anyone seeing you recently could honestly say you "very much look female." They must be looking at old videos.
Your voice has deepened greatly. That objectively has made a huge difference.
Simultaneously, your mannerisms are now much more masculine than feminine. Dressing as a man has made a huge difference
You do look like a sensitive person, with feelings which you do not hide. Great! That's certainly NOT the same as feminine. And that does not undermine the fact that you now look very strong inwardly.
I think I said in this video that there is an essential truth to what we are, that truth is unavoidably present , unavoidably real .... no matter what we do to our bodies it persists.
Besides this, further mutilating and highly risky surgeries would be a mistake and for me , not necessary .
@@Call-Me-Sam Thank you so much for handling my questions as you have.
As I've commented previously, we are all broken, have all been betrayed, we have all failed, and we all miraculously succeed in some degree.
You are succeeding miraculously, Sam.
We have a fundamental choice to make: those who reject narcissism in all its manifestations, surrender to the perfect will of the Father and obey Him will be restored in every way in the new world that He has prepared for us.
He has promised that He will "Wipe every tear away."
You are a beautiful human.♥️
Bless you. Thank you. We are all beautiful. !
I am so grateful that my gender has never been an issue with me. My heart goes out to all those who have issues.
I mean I can’t get enough of you! Your journey is so profound, I never heard anyone speak with such beautiful vulnerability and insight. Watching your videos is so healing, you are an incredible force of love, light, clarity and truth! Thanks for sharing and being yourself, what a gift you are giving us all x
Blessings as you continue on your journey❤️
Thät last bit really moved me. Did I do something that made my son he needed to apologise for who he was? Something I reflect on. Did I transit it even though I never transmitted it about him being gay did I contribute to his repudiation of being male?
Hey Tish. We can talk privately about the multiple different threads that I feel contributed to who I became and the choices I made. Text me if you want to talk.
@@Call-Me-Sam I will. He’s here at the moment but will text you when he’s out
@@tish3092 I've been thinking a lot about what you wrote here. As I heal, I can see so much more clearly into the past and what I see is that there were significant events that shaped me but most of all it was the environment and relationships. What was said and done, what was missing, what was communicated without words , the minutiae of detail that a child absorbs. It is impossible for the parents demeanour, thoughts and feelings not to shape the child .
Now I see that there was never a point to which I could return and reconnect, a time where I was not deeply traumatised and shaped by those relationships and the brokenness of the environment .
Who are we before we begin to be conditioned. ? That place before conditioning does not exist but as adults, with enough work and with enough determination to find liberation from our own delusions, we can break that conditioning . This is where we truly become an individual , no longer defined by those experiences.
I related to your language dilemmas, as a trans widow, ex-wife of a man who suddenly enveloped himself in a female persona, influenced by a non-certified therapist who encouraged his secret life away from our little family with 2 young sons. I'd rather a different category name, but there it is, the trauma is there in that language. I use the term cross-sex ideation instead of trans, and wish the mental health practitioners did too, as it's more accurate. I taught 4 young children in 20+ years who desisted after brief insistence of an opposite sex persona. These last 2 weeks I've felt a surge of psychological strength and energy. You are making momentous and forward-thinking decisions. "Undoing the artifice" is such a great phrase, and I remember your previous channel, when you were wrestling with this decision. You will be well. It's a mess not entirely of your own making. In fact, I think your situation is so fraught, since childhood. You will find grace. Ute Heggen
I agree, cross sex ideation is more accurate. Not all those who transition are the same. I'm recovering from surgery last week and will be back soon to talk about the clarity I now feel. Thanks Ute, yes, grace in simply being what I am, what I was too afraid to be.
You were misled, as so many have been. So glad it's done. I hope the recovery is going well. Every surgery is an ordeal. In a week or two, you'll have wellness. @@Call-Me-Sam
Hi Sam, glad to see a video of yours pop up on my feed. It's been a long time since that happened. Glad to see your journey continuing, & you doing well. Good luck with the doctors.
Regarding the focus on "self, self, self" that creating & maintaining the illusion of "transition" involves: what's ironic is that most girls & women historically haven't gotten to focus on ourselves to anywhere near the extent that "MtFs" do because starting as little girls, we get saddled with childcare duties, cooking, cleaning & other caretaking & domestic chores. Then when we grow up, most of us become mothers ourselves, and fairly soon too.
I have often thought that if "MtFs" only knew what life is actually like for most girls & women - a whole lot of taking care of others, wiping bottoms & noses, dealing with scutwork & literal shxt, etc - then the dream of "transitioning" & "becoming a woman" wouldn't be nearly so appealing.
The idea that being female is all about looking pretty & being glamorous & going through life "on easy mode" is such a fantasy - and a decidely male fantasy at that.
BTW, the different ways that males & females construct the self, & the size of the self in the two sexes, is an interesting topic. I remember in the 1970s reading & discussing the view of a philosopher or theologian (I don't recall the name, sorry) which said that for males in Western culture, the sin is too much self, whilst for females the sin is too little self. But that doesn't mean that having a "big" or bigger self is necessarily always a boon for males. The old phrase "fragile male ego" reflects the reality that an inflated self has special vulnerablities, after all. Moreover, as your life story shows, having a big self really sucks if you grew up full of self-loathing, shame & lack of self worth. A big self full of toxic feelings about the self/yourself is as an awful heavy burden to carry through life.
You might be interested in the work that Carol Gilligan did in the 70s and 80s on the differences in way boys & girls develop moral reasoning. It relates to the different ways that males & females construct & conceptualize the self & see it in relation to others.
Again, good luck with the surgery. Best wishes to you as always.
Thanks Roxy. Yes , I agree with your thoughts on MtFs.
No male will ever experience life as a female. All they can do to 'get close' to our experiences is achieve some kind of female social role IF no one knows they are male and they consistently pass 100% of the time, but even then their experience of being socially seen as a girl or woman is from the perspective of a male who CHOSE to live like this. Experiencing sexism when others see you as a woman really isn't the same when you're actually male. No male will ever have the experiences unique to females, good or bad. No Fear of rape with a pregnancy as a result. Never having to worry about birth control for yourself. Never getting to experience pregnancy and labour and all the good and bad this can come with. Same for breastfeeding (lactating males should not be allowed to 'feed' infants, this is a sex crime on an infant). The men who chose to try to "live as a woman" get to choose a female social role (only if they pass), get only the fun stuff like fashion and makeup and shoes and I guess being able to sit back in the dating game and let the men come to you. I guess if that's all "living as a woman" is and can be to a man, then I guess it is all fun to the men who choose this. I am female. I didn't get to choose my female body or what that means if I want to reproduce. I can't hide my female body, no matter what I wear others will still immediately identify me as female with all the good/bad consequences. I'm too scared to sleep in a tent or car by myself, which I don't think would be the case if I were male. I can't fight off any man due to my size and lack of strength. My fertility is limited and only out of higher education a handful of years (PhD) yet I'm already in the winter of my fertility. But there's good things too for the women who want motherhood, we don't have the same kind of rough play as boys do, we are at higher risk of sex crime but lower risk of other violent crime, I don't think any country will force females to frontline combat, sharing experiences with other women is nice, and we can easily connect with children without immediately being seen as a sex criminal. But the TiMs just get the makeup and fashion, but they also get to coerce and control others, invade female spaces, take away my rights, make themselves the centre of social groups and their relationship etc. I love androgynous and GNC men. I dated one and he was great. He wasn't confused about being male, though.
Hi Bill,. Agreed on much of this. I've known both privilege and prejudice being perceived as male and female. I've also experienced violence in the same way, and the threat of sexual violence. Males live with the threat of violence and most of the time, the reality of that. Transition isn't about " fun stuff " (don't let Demot Mulvaney be an example. )... maybe for some but for others it feels like a life or death attempt to make sense of self.
" But the TiMs just get the makeup and fashion, but they also get to coerce and control others, invade female spaces, take away my rights, make themselves the centre of social groups and their relationship etc." All of them ?
Both your poetry choices and how beautifully you read them is much appreciated Sam.
Thank you
I like who YOU are ♥️ You are Loved and always have Been. You’ve helped me find Value in my life ♥️✨Lovely experience.
I'm so glad to hear that, thank you Krissy.
What a brave person u are. Through Ur own journey, u help others. U are a good man respect.
I just came across your channel, Sam, and although I have not experienced the exact same in my life as you (as all our paths are varying and different), I have experienced abuse as a child which has molded much of my thinking and attitudes and actions into my adulthood that I am only very recently unraveling and beginning to truly comprehend and heal from. I also find many of the same feelings and emotions lying in my core that you have expressed you felt, mainly towards yourself. It is SO freeing, although many times quite difficult, when we come to understand a remarkably deep truth and then courageously step forward into that process of healing, but my goodness, I don't believe there is anything so spiritually renewing as when you are able to look back over your shoulder and see how far you've come from where you started.
I think you put it perfectly: transitioning from delusion to truth is the most important part. Our bodies may undergo various changes and appearances, but we are not our bodies. We are still we, no matter how we look.
God bless you, and thank you so much for sharing your story. You are a beautiful speaker and have been able to put to words what many feel and have not yet the inner voice to speak aloud. Thank you! I will be praying for you, and for me, and for the so many others out there in the world who are healing from trauma and those who have yet to join us. 💜
God bless you too. Thank you
Dear Sam. This is the third video I'm watching from you. I love the transparency of your soul. I'm in the path of detransitioning my own beliefs and lies. I had a difficult childhood too. You are being such an inspiration for my life in this very moment. Thank you for your returning to real Home. You know, there's a part in the Bible recalling the new born man, the rebirth, and that's exactly what you've gone through.. your awakening from illusion. Thank you.
You are a brave and beautiful soul created by God who has chosen in this life to walk a very hard path …in doing so you are able to help others , who follow you on this same journey, with your knowledge, honesty, kindness and awareness. You can touch their hearts and souls this way because you have been there and speak from a space of love and forgiveness. Bless you, my friend, on your journey and in your work. As you help others you are receiving the same 10 fold. ❤️🕊️🙏
Beautiful
No matter our sex, our gender, our age, as a human being it takes courage to be ourselves. Learning what Love is and what it isnt. Choosing Love over fear over and over and over again. Loving our bodies wherever we are along the way. Allowing and accepting our journeys without judgement. Nothing easy about it and the easiest way to be, all at the same time. Oh the paradoxes we face on the journey. Its harder than I expected it to be. But it's our process and how we find our way.
"The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are" -Carl Jung
"Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness.
It took me years to understand, that this, too, was a gift."
-Mary Oliver
And you may appreciate "The Guest House" by Rumi
Take care
Thank you
Well Sam
I am very proud of you.
On the beach, that feeling was self forgiveness. Acceptance of your real self
Lots of love to you❤❤❤❤❤
Best wishes for success and healing with the upcoming surgery.
Thank you, I think I'll be waiting a while but at least it's happening.
I want you to know how helpful your candor is to those affected by abuse (not necessarily affected by transgender issues). You’ve perfectly and eloquently put into words, trauma issues that plague us as well. God has chosen you as a voice to be a trumpet to those who will benefit from your experience. God bless you!
I'm so glad you like yourself now. You really should! You're very loveable, Sam. Thanks for another great sharing of your experiences, faith, thoughts, process, hope.
Thank you Robin... Work in progress.
Beautiful poem, thank you for being you.
You are a beautiful person, a precious soul ..You have been through unspeakable things, and you survived..you have so much to share...God has surely been loving you and protecting you through your life's journey.. May God bless you richly, and keep you in His loving care, always .💝💐🙏🙏🙏
Sam…..you’re Smiling! 😊❤️😍 What a breakthrough!! I know the feeling! Sending you So Much Love!!❤❤❤
This came up in my feed and I just want to say good luck on your journey. I pray that God will help you continue to heal and that he will use you to help others who are in the same position. May God bless you.
Thank you Roslyn. I really think God is helping me so that I may help others and that's why I survived. God bless you too.
I’m here for you Sam and I subscribed. I’m listening and I’m very sorry that you’re going through this. Just know it’s Not your fault. You just didn’t know and honestly it is happening all over. It’s going to be alright. You deserve to have a beautiful life.❤
Do you have any animals? I love animals tho it’s a huge responsibility.
Speaking your truth Sam, I am SURE will help others. And forgive yourself, you deserve to
Thank you. I'm waiting for a break in the weather so I can get out and make another video. So much has happened since this one, a gradual dawning clarity that has shown me the way forward.
The challenging weather we've had for the last few weeks has given me plenty of time to gather my thoughts. Hopefully this week I will have an opportunity to share those thoughts and can offer some help.
Best wishes
Sam
Thank you again for your open and honest sharing Sam. You are doing a huge service to others through these videos and I admire so much your courage in sharing so honestly and vulnerably such hard things. Your videos help me dealing with my own challenges, trauma and journey of self love and healing. xx
Thank you so much.
It's criminal how young people are being pressurised back into the 1950s-style gender stereotypes we all thought we had successfully put behind us. I grew up in the 70s. There was nothing odd back then, in masculine women and feminine men. Right up to the 90s, everyone was still comfortable with "gender-bending". Of which David Bowie is the most famous example.
Agreed
David Bowie, T Rex, Lou Reed, Mick Jagger. Unisex clothes. What effed it up!?
@@normanshadow1 social engineering
You must live in a different world than the one in the US. Here, all the pressure is to not conform to traditional gender roles.
Lovely and amazing you are. Peace and blessings.
Thank you
here is where I am, yes, that is true for so many of us. Wishing you the best.
It is a universal journey isn't it. Thank you Marla
I Love you. Thank you for your honesty. God Bless you, bro
Sam, you are a beautiful soul ❤❤❤
Thank you, as are we all. This is the tragedy, we can't see it
Thank you 🙏 you are incredibly courageous and beautiful. Coming back to your Self . You have given me light 🙏
The light is yours already ! Blessings to you Miriam
Always a joy to hear from you! Blessings on you and your surgery.
Thank you Grace
Of coirse they are lovely yoi all are paying for beach hoises amd yathz off the mentally ill im so sorry this is allowed you should be recwiving.reql care
understood but there are also good people who are blinded by their own beliefs
It’s been a while I’m so happy to see you again 😘😘😘😘
Thank you, Sam. You have always had value. I am glad that you are healing and learning to relate with God and love yourself without conditions. This is amazing to watch! Great job!
Thank you
Whichever is your gender predisposition, I support you. Pray for you. Wish you the best.
Thank you
Use whatever language in titles that you need to attract as many people as possible. Everyone does that.
I hear you but click bait doesn't feel right, I'd rather have fewer views .
The Great I am is,
The Great you are,
Love,
In its image,
Boundless…
Blessed, Layne
That is beautiful. Thank you Layne
❤
Hi Sam, I am thankful for your channel. I enjoy David Whyte as well - here is his poem called 'Enough':
'These few words are enough
If not these words, this breath
If not this breath, this sitting here
This opening to the life
We have refused
Again and again
Until now
Until now'
I went to Court a few years ago Determined by a sense of overwhelming Peace to say Crown Court (jury).... it was a BS charge and I had rage but gave it Up - I blew it on the day because of my self and trusted in convenient organised Others. So I learned a new (ongoing) lesson that Trust is not a collection of letters (or misspelled court docs !) but a Word. Lk 18 28-30
As a religious person, I listen a lot to detransitoners. I think they are plagued by a lot of demons from the past and trauma and without the help they need. I think partly it is also a narcissism (unintended) which is normalised in our societies which values the Self over anything else. Life doesn’t begin and end with me and I am not the most important thing in the world.
A part of the tragedy of abuse in childhood is that in a hostile environment the self becomes a refuge. For a child, when survival is vital, self is all there is .
I listen to a lot of detransitioners myself. There seems to be a very familiar thread in that of escape, to become someone else. I am just beginning my walk with God. He is the ultimate healer because he is truth.
@@Call-Me-SamYou are absolutely right.❤
Sam….❤…..you’re smiling! ❤❤❤❤❤❤ And YES!! You are Sooooo valuable!! Please remain unapologetically you.Sending you love!
Survival is an instinct. There are many coping mechanisms people use to survive their physical /emotional trauma, transitioning is just but one.
Wow...Sam. I love how you dont sugar coat anything. You say it as it is in order to desparately give a message across. Thank you again for educating a lot of youngsters contemplanting such an action.
You can't change things that already happen! Just say the lords prayer. Don't dwell on it! TOMORROW IS A NEW DAY TO START OVER.
sending love❤ Sam, hope all goes well with your surgery
Thank you, I am healing well and the surgery went better than expected. XX
Great video - Bravo! Loved the poem and being able to engage with your wisdom. That is the gift of your life. Life is reality, and perfection exists in Reality at every moment. The piercing perfection and joy of the moment as it is. Nature and Existence full on. Thank you for your broadcasts I'm really enjoying them. All the best!
Hi I just happened upon you and just want to say thank you for being vulnerable and honest about your journey. Actually friend, it amazes me that people of now are as sane as they are. Too many are raised with horrible parents and circumstances. Children raised be damaged children. The imbalance of father and mothers-homes, fathers are necessary, single parenting is hard on kids and has a huge impact on adults and children. Thank you for trying to have an impact because indeed you are worthy of self love for who you are born as. God bless you and may your journey be filled with new hope and eternal love for yourself.
That's a beautiful poem, I can relate to that personally, and I love your voice reading it ❤ I found a copy of that book online, always love a good recommendation from someone important and caring
Wilds of Scotland wow nice, what part family is from Glasgow . Live in Australia now.
Really enjoying learning from your experiences and support you in your journey. We have a young female in family now wanting to go by male name and beginning the process and I'm hoping sharing others experiences helps us to help her, and helps her to sort things out without being deeply harmed ❤
Your voice is so soothing. Have you ever thought of doing guided meditations? You would be a natural.
You helped me, through this video, come to the tears I needed😭Thank you, Sam🙏🏼
All I can say is that I'm so very happy for you. There is nothing better than living in truth. You will be a blessing to many. K in the US
Happy you found God to help you return to who you really are the male that god created you.This you are talking about will help young people and adults who are suffering delusion in trying to be someone else they are not supposed to be.More and more of people who have been traumaticed need help in forming groups like yourselves in schools and college to educate and guide these troubled souls away from the woke cult that has been telling untruths and damaging these souls and guide them to Gods love and protection.God Bless. ❤😊
First vid of yours I watched was a min ago and I didn't know you were a detransitioner
Hi Sam! Was wondering what your plans might be down the road.
Hi Terry. Truthfully, I am in the early stages of recovering my life . My plan is to gently rebuild and continue to document my healing. Those who find my videos helpful sometimes reach out and want to talk, as time goes by I think this will become the focus of my life. Helping others similarly in pain who are trying their best to reclaim their lives. It really helps to know that there is one who understands how it feels to barely survive such intense pain.
In my heart I know that this is what God wants me to do. I pray for clarity so that I may help others.
@@Call-Me-Sam That’s beautiful Sam. Sometimes we can become paralyzed because of the trauma we’ve experienced and helping others seems very hard to even contemplate. I think it’s wonderful that you want to help others and I’ve read the comments that you receive about your videos. People say over and over how much you are helping them. You should feel really good about that. Someone once said that it is in giving that we receive and it’s clear to me that you are trying to give others an understanding that you care about their trauma in the midst of your own. That’s beautiful Sam. Have a great day in your beautiful part of the world. ❤️
@@KA2HRO Thank you Terry,
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I am a child of trauma too and it too has caused me and caused me to cause myself much pain.
Hi Sam. I admire your courage to be transparent and share your thoughts so honestly. Sending love and positive vibes. Bless you ❤
Thank you
I hope you are proud, in all humility, of what you have achieved, because it is quite something. All the best.
I hear you but nothing I do , I do alone. The foundational relationship I speak of is with a higher power.
Just speak your truth Sam.❤
♥️💜♥️💜♥️💜♥️💜♥️💜
This is beautiful Sam, glad to see you feel value in yourself and giving yourself the space to help others too!
Thank you
I want to say, “I like who I am now.”
Can I ask what's wrong with your voice???? I'm praying 🙏 for you 🙏 I haven't heard from you before, can I ask are you a man becoming a female? Or the other? I can't tell!
Hi Shirlee. My vocal cords were damaged in my twenties from a series of surgeries to remove growths that were benign . This created scar tissue.
I was born male and transitioned to live as female. After 25 years, I have detransitioned ( mostly ) and am now living more honestly as an androgynous man. Later this year I am having surgery to remove my breast implants and the excess skin. That is what I refer to in this video.
Thank you for your prayers.
@@Call-Me-Sam Pacea , seninătatea și armonia să-ți locuiască sufletul tău mare, frumos și bun! Salutări din Europa !
What a Blessing to get Love from The Source, no?
It is
Glad I found you. Checking out your blog and love hearing/reading your story. God bless you!
Thank you Heather,
Sam, hadn’t had your vids come up in my feed! So glad to see you! I’ve got some catching up to do.
It's good to see you.
❤
Thank You
❤🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
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I honestly feel that if you had not transitioned, you may have left this earth. We would not have had the pleasure of experiencing your raw honesty, your unique journey and hearing your incredible introspection. You're a very special person.
Why did you do it in the first place?
I truely dont understand this shit!
Its insane!
You seem lovely and I really hope you are doing well 😊
Humans are complicated. We suffer and find ways of coping with our suffering . Transition is an extremely powerful strategy for taking control of your life and escaping our suffering..... or so it seems at the passing of time. When we're young we make mistakes, we have limited knowledge and experience that only changes over time. Accepting those mistakes, the consequences of which we cannot change, invariably forces us to outgrow our former self.
This is the work of every human , we all make mistakes , we all, to varying degrees of severity live with the consequences of those mistakes.
It was a false hope... thinking the other "pretended" gender would be the answer for their trauma and lack of self-knowing. But at this point, with all the alternations... maybe playing the female social gender role again would be the best choice, since he looks very feminine. But probably all of that "playing" is too much for him now.
OMG No! You wouldn’t be the person you are now, this beautiful person. Women’s bodies shift and sag. Live with it. We have to.😂 Knives are not the answer. Acceptance. As a “feminized make” you are amazing. You’re not disgusting. Focus on the “other things.” Jeez, Sam. I see you.💕 A cutter sees a cutter.
But he doesn't want to live as a woman. He wants to live as a male. So breast removal isn't mutilation, it's restorative and corrective to allow him to be the person he is and was meant to be, not a costume.
Removing something artificial that was never a natural part of oneself is about healing not harm.