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Liiiisten, I have absolutely used the aftershave ball cream on my face on the rare occasion that I actually shave it. My wife uses it in her armpits. Good stuff!
Let’s not forget, Shari has aunts that are family vloggers as well. She is not just speaking out against Ruby, she is speaking out against her cousins’ parents and that is incredibly brave of her. I hope Shari gets everything she wants, needs and deserves after everything she has been through. ❤
Honestly, it sounds like a nightmare, being forced to 'act' in your own life, it's so awesome of her to try and bridge the gap of understanding so that the regulators know what it is they're regulating. How can you protect people if you don't understand what's happening to them?
just an idea.. demonitize content with children. you can post your kids, ya just won’t get paid for it. i imagine the quantity of content and exploitation will drastically decrease.
Though my mom didn't vlog, she was an intense Facebook mom. While she didn't record me, she posted hundreds of photos of me to her public Facebook without my consent. I completely agree with the daughters hard stance.... I grew up knowing hundreds of strangers had seen and heard all of my embarrassing moments, photos I didn't want posted. There is no ethical way to post your children to the Internet, because no child is able to consent to content being made about them.
I very, very rarely post pics of my kids on Facebook. If I want my family to see any, I send them to them directly. Even with privacy settings, you can never be sure that no one else can see them. And in my case, even with (what I assumed was) pretty tight settings, my MIL would take my photos and post them on her Facebook. And then my FIL (who I actually had blocked) would get them from her FB and post them to his, with my kids names! I had him blocked because he would not be careful about who he friended, and would massively overshare. When I realized what was happening, I felt extremely violated.
I wonder why parents with good intentions don't just record their kids as they please and then just don't post it. Maybe when the kid turns 18 they can decide what gets uploaded and what doesn't and then at that point deal with the money situation 🤷♀️ that way the parents have that digital timeline to look back on and reminisce and the child (now adult) consents to what could be shown
My mom wasn't quite as intense, but me and my sis always asked her to not post our pics in Facebook and she still did most of the time. They often just don't get it...
Thank you so much for sharing part of your story. I think stories like yours are such a valuable insight into how this should play out. I hope you've found some healing
Kevin Franke better not get off scott free, he may have not directly abused his kids, but his neglecting his kids had definitely impacted the whole family in a highly damaging way smh.
He watched it happen. He was there and agreed with the punishments these kids got. He might not have been there for the Jodi incident but he is just as bad. I mean, what dad doesn't see or know what's going on with your kids for over a year? There really is no excuse for that in my opinion
I don’t believe for a second that he didn’t know or that he didn’t participate. He shouldn’t get to make everyone else take the fall while he roams free.
As someone who’s been forced to suffer under Utah’s troubled teen industry, it just seems like the state thrives off of children. Breaking, abusing, and pretending to care for them.
@ I’ll get justice when the places I had to go get shut down, and the people who worked there have it as a permanent scar on their record. Other than that, I’ve moved on. My family is supportive and regrets sending me there (the vast majority of facilities lie about how ethical they are, and limit any and all communication. So they thought they were sending me to a place that was better than what it was.)
Shari is a great voice for children who are being exploited online. Her speech was empowering and hope her voice reaches even further down the road for changes to come. We need all of the states to put more laws in place to protect kids online
What an incredible young lady to bring this all to light even if this has caused her humiliation, she still fights for the rights of other children! ✌🏻🙏🏼❤️
Shari is amazing. She is making a difference. As soon as she left home, she attempted to rescue her younger siblings by contacting CPS. Unfortunately, their response was insufficient! Best wishes to this wonderful human being!
My oldest daughter (33) had her 1st child in February. She requested, upon finding she was pregnant, not to share pictures of her child online with my Facebook friends or on my blog. I agreed without a qualm. It was not unfair for her to make that request. Since I am in NC and she is in AZ, she shares loads of pics and videos via texting. They are on my computer and while I may show a friend a pic on my phone face-to-face, the child has never been posted by me anywhere.
Wish I had a parent like you. I’m literally about to give birth any hour and all my mom wants to do is get her pictures in to post on fb. I told her and my dad absolutely not and no pictures are to be taken. They do not respect my boundaries with my kids. I’m not allowing them at the hospital. It sucks.
Absolutely!! I have even see YT comment on very popular family vlogger channels. It’s INSANE!! Wanted to mention, it’s the legit YT channel, not a fake. It’s awful. So many children are being exploited.
We need legislation that protects kids. We can’t trust corporations to do the right thing, they won’t. We need laws to be made that force companies to comply, punishable even at their financial detriment.
It's sad that the TH-camrs themselves to say something. Also, the fact that the audience of the channels sometimes adds to it. An arts and crafts channel I watch, Moriah Elizabeth, has had to say multiple times to her audience that she does not want her two daughters and their names to be on the internet, and to stop asking. But they don't care.
@@cassidythecatI have seen that too. It's so sad that people don't understand why someone may want to "remain private" while still being a public figure.
True. I watch a family channel, and they are a lovely family with good responsible parents. I don't necessarily want to name them because I'm afraid there are a lot of haters out there.
I am speaking to the difference between showing your friends pics of your kids and monetizing their entire lives to pay your own bills. One is sharing, the other is selling.
Utah children services is a literal joke. It is THE culture to treat women and children as possessions. The polygamist compound in the U.S. isn’t far from St George/Ivins Utah (Arizona border/Colorado City) where child abuse is rampant. I know what I’m talking about. I’m ex-LDS who lived nearby in Cedar City. Good job, SWOOP!
It’s a different world that I’m learning about. I wish I could pick your brain or you could just tell me about the LDS/mormon Utah culture. It’s fascinating, heartbreaking and super disturbing. I’ve been nothing a theme in our country: different communities who thrive on punishment culture. They seem to get excited, salivating when it’s their time to punish, when they think someone has wronged, and they package it as tradition or hierarchy, but it’s a giddiness to inflict some kind of hurt upon others. Anyway, thank you for sharing. I bet you have some stories from your days in Utah, and I’m glad you’re free. 💙
@@noodlepoodlegirlI see that giddiness for punishment in progressive circles too, primarily in people who are exvangelical or other high control groups. Like they ditched one dogma for another. I really wish people would see the patterns more.
@Heydodoakskdkdjf I've noticed that too! There are so many younger Millennials and Gen Zers who superficially look like they carry progressive beliefs, but when you look closer, it's like they only changed superficially and not deep down. They still appeal to authority, think in terms of black and white, proselytize, struggle with nuance/ambiguity and the unknown, socially ostracize and eviscerate people who don't conform to the group's ideas, try to force people into roles and boxes, and insist on an us versus them mentality (a zero-sum mentality). It makes me realize that these people... while they might've stopped with the "homosexuality is a sin" sort of talk, they really haven't deconstructed in any other sort of way. To continue with that example, they just moved from "being gay is a sin" to "being a homophobe is a sin", in terms of evolution.
When my sister had her little lad, she was insistent that his face never be posted online. I never understood at first, but the more I see about Family Vlogging and how children are impacted once they’re grown up, the more I get it now. My heart goes out to these poor kids.
My daughter asked us not to post our granddaughter to much on Facebook, but its not only for her mental well-being later on but also due dad’s job. I mostly ask if i can share our granddaughter with our flyball team members but that’s a private account.
i felt the same way. i remember when i was sixteen i thought my aunt's stances on screen time and social media were so weird and dumb. now i'm in my 30s and i get it.
My younger sister is very private. She doesn’t have any social media. She has two minor kids. My brother has minor kids, too. I don’t post any of these kids faces. I always cover their faces or crop them out. So I don’t post even adults that have told me not to. We should respect others.
Good question and absolutely not! If what happened to their nieces and nephews did not cause them to stop absolutely nothing will! Remember Bonnie’s statement after Ruby was arrested? She was basically telling the world they would continue with family vlogging.
Parents think they own their children, when what they actually own is the responsibility to care for and raise their children, and that can and should be taken away when it can be proven that they are abusing their ownership.
As a disabled adult who was a disabled child, absolutely the hell not. We are not here for inspiration. We're people. And if it was really about education about said disability, it wouldn't center the "poor martyr parents." I am so sick of seeing those accounts.
Yeah, those accounts have all the same worst-of-the-worst content that family channels with non-disabled kids have (bathtime, toilet training, meltdowns, bad days, etc), but throw up the "it's EDUCATIONAL!" as a shield and everyone just sort of allows it despite the fact that there are already resources out there that don't exploit kids to give you the basics of whichever disability there is. But like you said, it's less about, "here are some definitions and signs of x in this disability/disease/syndrome/etc" and WAY more about "and this is why you shouldn't give ME, THE MOMMY, dirty looks when my kid has a meltdown in the store because I'm actually a GOOD Mama, and actually deserve a medal for taking my kid out in public at all!"
I once went up to a disabled woman at a conference after she spoke and told her I found her so inspiring. When she asked "why?" I talked about her breaking into a male-dominated industry and her forging ahead despite financial difficulties. She let out a big sigh and thanked me that I didn't say it was because of her disability. I honestly didn't even think about the fact that she was in a wheelchair. We then had an enlightening conversation about "inspiration p*rn" which I didn't even know existed at that time! I hope you now have the support you need and are surrounded by people who love you for you.
I came here to say the exact same thing. Why is not ok to share a non-disabled child’s life on the internet without consent, but it’s ok to do that to a disabled child for the sake of “educating parents”? Disabled people and children and two groups notorious for being dehumanized and given little to no agency or rights, so it’s kind of insane to think disabled children are the exception to this issue, and not one of the most likely victims with the least agency given to them. Parents and their needs are not the center of this discussion, and even if they were, parents who exploit their disabled children are not people you should EVER get parenting advice from. Having watched a few when I was kid, family vloggers with disabled kids are honestly some of the most deeply vile of family vloggers out there. The parents treat their kids like a pet and center themselves and their emotional journey, and they show every single detail of their child’s life, from filming “meltdowns” (that feels like a really demeaning word to use but I can’t think of a less demeaning one) to telling an audience explicit details about bathroom topics. I remember I once saw this one woman vehemently defending putting her nonverbal daughter with Downs syndrome and autism in ABA therapy, acting like the comment she was responding to was “hate” and how dare someone question how she was raising her kid. But the comment she was responding to was from an adult with autism speaking from experience on how much ABA therapy is awful for people with autism. Family vloggers are all unethical but this particular kind are pretty much evil.
Another excellent doc from you, Swoop. One of your very best. As someone who does not watch family vloggers, I had no idea of the evil they do. Invasion of the child's privacy, 24/7 filming when there are child labor laws. Ruby's daughter told a truly heartbreaking story about wanting to mourn alone and not being allowed. And no friends because other kids don't want to be embarrassed. That this articulate and brave young woman was able to survive emotionally is a miracle. In short: she was denied a life by her parents who only cared about money. Ruby AND her husband should be in prison for life with no parole. It's a travesty that they should ever be released!
As a disabled person, I’ve found that disability family content most of the time just infantilizes people especially those with Down syndrome, cerebral palsy and Autism (which I have). Autism moms as we call them, can sometimes make it their whole personality and can give way to a Gypsy Rose situation.
I came to the comments specifically looking for someone speaking up about this. I'm AuDHD and I honestly find it difficult to interact with Autism moms. They tend to be SO disrespectful to us as Autistic adults and abusive to the Autistic community as a whole... including their kids in the way they portray and speak about them online. It's infuriating, especially when they praise harmful organizations like Autism Speaks and push the puzzle piece on us despite our speaking up about why we find it harmful and reject it as a representative symbol!
I believe she didn't intend to word it in this way. She might have been highlighting the fact that there's a lack of access to it in other countries, so to use it as a punishment or control is wrong. You're absolutely right!
She definitely didn't mean it should be a privilege, but right now it is unfortunately. It should be a given, it should be shared by all. No child deserves to starve, no parent deserves to watch their children starve, no person deserves to starve. No one deserves to starve or live in a food desert. She meant well in what she said, Swoop is absolutely so kind. I worked as a manager of a middle school kitchen and the amount of times I was supposed to THROW AWAY good food while there were a bunch of kids who couldn't afford to eat was astounding. Well fuck that, I fed ever damn kid whether they could pay or not. To be a child with hunger pains surrounded by kids eating great food... It's just cruel. 2 of those angels didn't even eat over the weekends. So every Friday we hooked them up, emptied their backpacks in my office and filled both bags with milk, sandwiches, cereals their younger siblings would like, vegetables, cookies, juices, whatever they wanted. None of us ever got caught but if we had we would've been fired and prosecuted by USDA because it's their property technically. Miss those kiddos. No child deserves to be hungry.
@Rainy-In-The-Desert no. Food is not a privilege, it's needed to live. I know you guys are trying to defend her wording, but you all are wrong as well. I believe Swoop thought the word was appropriate, why I don't know.
@@Rainy-In-The-Desert middle school cafeteria manager? Sure. Anyway,at any school,of you don't pack or pay for lunch,as a parent and former child,they'll give you a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, milk,etc. Let's not forget FREE LUNCH,is real,even in high school.
I'm very anti family vlogs now. I used to post my nieces, we would do fantasy/fairies/fashion photoshoots with candid videos. one of the videos blew up and got 40k views and I was offered to monetize my channel. while I was thinking about it, I was notified by a comment that the reason that video got so many views was because it was saved on a pedo playlist. I privated all the videos with my nieces and didn't look back. I only post my kids to my private profiles for distant family and my kids are never shown publicly. just don't do it.
I am so sorry that this happened to you. Especially when you were doing something from such an innocent point of view. There will always be awful people who view a video in a completely different manner than you or I.
thank you for self reflecting your behavior and realizing what effect that can have on the safety and mental health of your nieces. you made the right decision by stopping to share them publicly and i'm sure when they are old enough to fully grasp the extend of what happens when their childhood pictures and videos are shared they will be thankful that you stopped it and protect them instead, so their beautiful childhood memories aren't tainted because of the comments people made about them or that they were used by pedos for different purposes. it's not easy to recognize and accept that you made a mistake and change for the better, so i'm really proud of you! i'm sure you are a great aunt! 💕
@@sarahholland2600 it was more than 10 years ago, I wasn't internet savvy at all, and youtube was very different at the time. there was no notice of "this video was added to a playlist" or anything. I only knew cuz someone ether left a comment on the video itself or sent me a youtube message.
Personally I've always preferred the way "Maybe even us" flows better. Something about that extra syllable is *chef's kiss* to my brain. Whatever you decide to do, it is your channel and ultimately, the rest of us are along for the ride. Thank you for another dip into the suspool!
It flows better for sure, but I also think that “Or is it us?” gives off a more a paranoid, gaslighty, ‘can I even trust myself?’ vibe whereas “Maybe even us.” implies having critical thinking and being aware of our own biases and those of others. It feels more like “have a healthy dose of skepticism, the openness to new information and the willingness to change your opinions accordingly, don’t just blindly believe what you hear or get conspiratorial to rationalize those beliefs.”
For those who isn’t familiar with Jackie Coogan’s name, he played the original Uncle Fester in the 1960s “Adam’s Family” and one of his first movie was in “the Kid” with Charlie Chaplin.
The fact that she has to say she's not there to "provide the solution" is exceptionally depressing to me. She's talking TO THE PEOPLE IN CHARGE. SHE is not the person who SHOULD have to provide a solution anyway! THEY'RE. IN. CHARGE. They're the ones who should be told what the problems are and THEY find the solution. THEY search for experts to look into the problem that's been highlighted to them so THEY can find the solution. How the hell is a singular person without any power supposed to rock up with a folder of the perfect solution? That's not her job! That's theirs! And shame on them that it's taken this long to even bother at least faking caring about hearing about the problem, let alone looking for a solution.
You are right but the truth of how the USA functions- the burden is on the slave with less power and the ones with power get to do what they want no matter how much it hurts. Until the roots of slavery are destroyed these evolutions of slavery will continue- Survivor of modern day slavery.
Unfortunately, in the real world, it is a privelege. That doesn't mean it isn't a necessity- in many respects, most necessities are a privelege because we need money to access them.
I don’t think she meant food is a privilege that needs to be earned and more so that as a whole, being able to afford food is a privilege. so to then deny your children of that privilege as a punishment when you have more than enough to feed them is evil.
For 7 years, I worked a job where I was on call 24 hours a day, and it was exhausting and extremely, extremely stressful. I cannot imagine putting that level of pressure on a child. I feel so deeply for these children, and I’m so, so proud of this incredible young woman for coming forward and standing up for children like her. I’m so glad she’s brought so much of this industry to light.
I believe the law is misinterpreted in this video, I believe they get an initial percentage based on how often they appear in videos that make 10cents or more, and then 15% of that is put away in a trust they can’t access until they are 18. So it’s just a percentage of how much they earn being put away, but they are still earning more than that 15%. That’s the way I interpreted it.
The concept of forever is wild. My dad tried to explain it to me when I was little, he said “imagine the smallest bird you’ve ever seen - it flies around the entire world and takes one bite out of the earth per flight around the world. By the time he finishes eating the whole world, he isn’t even close to “forever”.
My mom tried explaining it to me with the "grains of sand, drops of water in the ocean" metaphor I've seen a lot, but the thing that made it stick was actually when I learned of dinosaur fossils! They were here a reeeeeeeeeallly long time ago, and they're still being discovered. What's going to find our bones someday?
What's the difference between child Hollywood stars and children in home vlogging social media? One has regulations to follow, and the children are paid. The other has no regulations, and the children receive no pay.
Jesus if you TH-cam won’t let you say half the words in this piece they can’t crack down a little bit harder on family vloggers. What an impressive articulate young lady. Great speech. Hope it’s heard
When I was a kid, my parents did “vlogs” but it was recorded on 8mm tapes on a camcorder for our family to view ONLY. There was no TH-cam or Facebook or Instagram. Recording my first steps, my first birthday, my first Christmas, etc. it’s for memories. It’s one thing to document your kids growing up but monetizing it and putting it out there for the world to see is just,.. not okay.
I cannot believe the strength of this young woman. She's been through heck and continues to go through heck when she just wants peace. She decided to continue to deal with this to help rather than hide. She doesn't even realize just how strong she is.
She didn’t have to do this. She probably didn’t really want to do this. Who would? Thrust into the limelight, first by her parents filming her, then due to her mother’s arrest and her family’s trauma, I wouldn’t blame her for trying to slip into the shadows. But she realized she had a chance to speak up on behalf of others, and she did. I really respect her courage.
RIGHT!?! I’ve been trying to keep up with her case, but so many people have moved on, and I am a bit too dumby dumb dumb to read the actually released court jargon! Thank you Swoop!!! For helping us dummies keep up with this case!
i’m glad you covered this because ever since the uproar of Ruby’s initial arrest, i haven’t seen it talked about at all. i didn’t even know Shari had spoken. it’s important to highlight the voices of victims, always.
We need to uplift Sherri, and turn the microscope on Sam for his turn in court. Every video makes it clear that "they are a 'good' little LDS family" meaning the father is 'head of the house', disciplinarian, and decision maker. Not a fcking CHANCE that he gets to run away from everything he did.
@@B.Harper7 i’ve had the same thoughts as someone familiar with the LDS faith… the man is always head of house. at best he was neglectful, at worst he was actively involved
Right!!! Like come on there's no way you can spin it to be "just for memories..." If so, it wouldn't be monetized. There are ways to privately share the files with family members as well. People who try to say it is just for the memories are straight up lying, and in doing so are even more selfish for not admitting the true intent. Crazy stuff.
yep, I have VHS-C tapes that I need to transfer to dvd or blu ray whatever. It's the only way my youngest son will get to hear my mom speak, laugh and such.
Some thoughts: - would it help to just make it illegal for any childs face to be posted online? Can be blurred? - can it be made illegal for any personal information of the children to be online? - can we demonitise all child content? - can we have laws protecting working hours for child influencers? - if it does stay monetized, can we have better laws making sure the profit goes to the child?
I am a SA victim, It happened in the late 80's, I never told anyone, To this date I was with the woman of my dreams, met in 2000, moved with her in 2002, I couldn't even tell her, we married in 2022 and I told her then so scared she would reject me. She told me her story, we cried, stood up and the shame was gone. I wish I could or would have spoken out sooner.
Thank you for sharing your story on such a large space. While what was was done should never happen to anyone and I'm terribly sorry you felt unable to do so for so long, I firmly believe that someone will read this and find hope and healing. Once again, while an awful thing that I wish no one has to face, the fact that not only were you able to finally open up to your partner (now spouse) and she did so in turn is incredibly moving. We all heal at different paces and ways. Speaking as a fellow survivor (who's also known many) I'm acutely aware of the fear you described and sometimes it 'reappears' long after we thought it was 'behind us' especially when we have a chance at forming/cementing a deep connection. What you described happening between the two of you was incredibly beautiful and intimate. I truly feel there's more than a few people having a similar internal struggle that will find strength and inspiration from this. Thank you for your story and vulnerability, I know it will have a positive impact. I also wish the two of you all of the happiness and healing in the world. May you have amazing journeys together.
I'm a psychotherapist and I often say to clients that "just like salt dissolves in water and its ok to cry, and shame dissolves in oxygen and its ok to speak and be safely heard". I'm so glad you found this to be true.
❣Shari ❣She just explained so much about "reality" in American culture. The obsession with clout, money and "things" hurts people. Always has, always will. Just being you SHOULD be enough!! Love your takes on this dangerous drama, Swoop. Always. Much as I hate all of it, always good to be informed. And have compassion for those who Chose to share their experience!!
Stolen Childhoods. This is so predatory, I cant imagine the damage growing up with a camera shoved in your face. Good for you Shari. This issue needs more light shined on it, good work Swoop.
I don’t know what it’s going to take to ban family blogging. I don’t even have social media and I could list 15 horrific situations that have happened because of it. Since we know these parents are going to choose money over the safety and privacy of their children, It’s time for the government to step in! I’m getting my masters to be a mental health counselor and last semester, I wrote one of my final papers on the dangers & long-term psychological/traumatic effects… It has to stop.
Family Vlogging is big business... for the family, the state, TH-cam... it's a snowball rolling downhill and is only getting bigger, Rubys is just the worst, but she's also the 1st... sadly, she will be outdone, and some poor child will lose their life over family vlogging eventually
Ruby Franke is not the First. “Fantastic Adventures,” “DaddyO’5,” and let’s not forget reality TV like the Duggars. Ruby can be credited with shining on a spotlight on these problems. Now we have the Nurse Hannah issue. At the very least, this subject should be closely examined. Former child influencers have the benefit of hindsight and lived experiences. We definitely need to listen to them. But I agree, Ruby will not be the last.
Australia recently banned children under 16 to have a social media account, but-I’m not sure if family members are permitted to post their children on social media. I think it’s a start, but I wonder how they’d enforce it? Do you think that would help?
You’re right- we need legislation to hold greedy companies and families accountable, they’re not going to do it themselves. Hope our happens soon. I fear many right wing politicians aren’t interested in protecting children/child labor laws, and would in fact rather profit from them, so we’ll see..
21:12 the worst part is if you denied doing it more than likely they would tell the siblings like "hey *blank* is why we arent going to Disney because they wouldnt do this video"
The thing that kind of impacted me the most in this whole CA Situation was the fact, that I know how this turns out when no one stops it. I have seen enough True Crime that i have seen similar cases. If he didnt escape, at least one of them would have died. The crazy control about food and exercise is textbook.
I don't know if the church itself has any involvement with CPS, but I wouldn't be surprised to learn that there are a lot of Mormons running the agency. Having been raised Mormon and with several niblings also being raised in it, I can confidently say that I wouldn't want 99% of people who believe in that faith to have any part in deciding who is and isn't taking proper care of their children.
It's not by chance that many Tax avoiding and religious bodies have so many people in prominent governmental and regulatory positions. It's by design. Like any mafia, the best way to avoid accountability, control threaten and scapegoat is by taking over the regulatory bodies and making them work for you.
They're part of every government organization throughout the entire state, as is the xtian church as a whole in every other state but more higher degree in the south and midwest. It's permeates the courts, CPS, clinics, public schools, etc, and causes a LOT of issues.
its not involved with cps here officially, but it is heavily influenced by their practices. most ppl run to their church than thestate here so they can keep is silent. I think if religious places don't wish to be associated with grooming and silencing victims, they should maybe start being against it I like maybe three moms in this state- and its due to them being fully rounded adults that understand this crap isn't right to their kid, caught or not...
I think Pleasant Peasant Media/Momma Cusses/Gwenna does a beautiful job of sharing things about her family in a way that may be helpful for others, and opens up conversation. With her younger kids she doesn't show them on camera and reenacts situations playing the roles of her children instead of putting them on camera. Her older daughter sometimes makes appearances but she is old enough to consent and it always seems like stuff she wants to be included in, I don't think I've ever seen her in anything embarrassing.
Yes! And she doesn’t use their names, so the stories can’t be traced back to them. She calls them “the littles” or the “middle” to preserve their anonymity 🤍
I would call her a parenting influencer, she protects her kids privacy and shares evidence based parenting advice. Family vlogging makes their kids the focus for profit. Gwenna makes HER mistakes and failures as a parent the focus, yes for profit, but also to help younger parents. Theres a place for parents sharing advice, there is no place for family vloggers.
I’ll be honest I used to enjoy family content without much thought until I found your channel and helped me to think critically about it. Thank you for opening my eyes to the realities of family vlogs. ❤
Banned - children can not consent. It's that easy. No vlogging, no toy review, non of it - you can talk about diseases and disabilities WITHOUT showing your kids or naming them
@@twinmama16child actors have limits on how long they can work. They have teachers, agents, and child services on set. They have the backing of SAG-AFTRA. No, it isn’t perfect. But it’s much better than what reality tv and mommy blogger kids have. Also, child actors clock out at the end of the day. Reality tv and mommy blogger kids can’t quit their lives.
The same goes for child actors then I would assume? So all the movies with under 18 actors and actressess should be removed, and people who view these movies aren't much better than those who view child corn, it's just a different more normalized voyeuristic violation of consent.
@@twinmama16child actors have financial protection and legal access to privacy laws. These kids are not actors- their lives are being filmed and they have no legal right to compensation or access or privacy. Every single second of their lives can be posted. Yes, child actors have paparazzi follow them and are famous, but they can take legal recourse l against those who overstep
@@tayzk5929it’s different- vlogs are not the same as movies. Vlogs are a persons life, movies are filmed at specific times and have contracts and regulations when it comes to children. There are no laws when it comes to vlogging with a child (other than no ab^se). And even then, some people like Ruby Franke get away with ab^se for years. That’s the problem with vlogging
Very powerful speech from Shari. She is being a voice for all the children being exploited around the world. I truly believe in time she will make a huge impact and things will change. She’s an amazing, intelligent, strong woman. I hope that she is healing and doing well.
That woman is unhinged if she thinks a pre schooler can pack their own lunch. My daughter is 6 and not saying because she is mine but she is a smart cookie but I would not be trusting her with packing her own lunch the poor kid puts her own underwear on backwards atleast 4x a week she would starve or have the most random stuff
And God forbid the child have ADHD or something similar. My sister is a grown adult and still routinely forgets important things like her phone, charger, medication, or her own glasses.
I packed my lunch at 6... but my parents were pretty awful. Anyway, 14 is definitely too old to be making lunch for your kid. 10 should be starting to help with packing and by 12 they should do it themselves, barring any special needs.
I actually used to follow a family vlog when I was younger. I stumbled across a couple’s vlogs about their infertility journey. Happily, they got pregnant, and vlogged their pregnancy. And then their child. And then their second child. Shortly after their first child was born, the husband quit his job and they vlogged full time. It was such a gradual process, I don’t think they set out to be family vloggers. It started as them discussing infertility and then snowballed. And their content always seemed sweet and lighthearted, and they seemed like such a wonderful family. But those kids were always on camera. They would sometimes even pick the camera up and pretend to vlog as toddlers. Turns out the mom in this family is actually Ruby’s sister. I doubt (and hope) she’s as far along the crazy train as Ruby, but when your family income is derived from filming your kids for content, it’s easy to slide down a slippery slope.
Ruby’s sister was totally intending to be a big family vlogger. She got the idea from Ruby. Fundie Fridays has a great video about the whole family tree
We watched this happen with the children with Jon and Kate plus 8 and when their children came forward about being filmed their whole childhoods and how it affected them. But no one listened to those poor kids, but now all of a sudden people are taking it seriously. It must be frustrating for them to process.
True, that was a big turning point in entertainment being children as content.... at least because they were on television they had SOME protection that child performers receive and certain content is not allowed on television. Family vloggers can film anything and everything they choose with zero oversight or laws that regulate the exploitation of kids who can't consent and become the bread winners for their families. It's the wild west in the family vlogging space.
I hate the idea of "these kids are getting nice things they should be happy." my parents took us on a lot of vacations because my dad worked for an airline and so we got free flights. I hated going on vacations. my parents always wanted to take us to places we didn't want to go and do things only they cared about, and if we complained we were ungrateful. I had depression and anxiety and I just wanted to stay at home during summer vacation, but we were always going on trips. Also I get really bad motion sickness so evertime we went on a trip I either threw up all over the plane and airport or I had to take so much dramamine that I was knocked out for the entire day. Then when I grew up and I tried to talk to my parents about any abusive or neglectful behaviors they did it was thrown back at me that they gave us whatever we wanted (they didn't) and they took us on all those fun vacations (they weren't fun) and we were ungrateful. haven't talked to them for 13 years. Don't regret it for a second.
I think the wild thing that people fail to grasp is that the children, in addition to not being renumerated properly, they can't hand in their notice and find alternative work because it's their home. It's modern slavery.
As someone who has worked in policy making, 15% being set aside in a trust is small but having policy on the books is a really hard first step. In the future this can be increased, getting policy passed is much more helpful than having the perfect policy!
I think Gwen, Mommacusses, does it very well. She has two toddlers who are not filmed at all, but her oldest daughter is allowed on camera if she wants to, and she has conversations about how the internet is forever and her daughters digital footprint.
How old is her oldest daughter? Because even 17 is too young to fully and knowledgably consent. Even the most mature 17 year olds could change their minds as a slightly older adult. No criticism, just curious.
Sorry just to add, it doesn't appear they've moved to a more luxurious house etc. and most of her stuff is in shorts/tiktok with minimal paid promotions or flaunting of extravagant trips that were paid by her following which also kinda indicates that she's kinda just in it for expressing her experiences, tips and tricks for parenting rather than the monetary gain of it all
But you have to keep in mind that her daughter is probably 17 at this point and it’s not like she doesn’t know this. We’ll see her from time to time, but it’s also not Gwen‘s main focus of her social media and she hasn’t even shared the names of the toddlers.
I wouldn’t even call it family vlogging. I would call it parenting advice and that she is the focus of her own content. The daughter does appear but the daughter isn’t the star at all.
15:20 “There is no such thing as a moral or ethical family vlogger.” Goodness sweetheart, I’ve never heard a more true statement “straight from the horses mouth”. You deserve ALL the praise, as well as your siblings. Such strong young people, my heart goes out to each one of y’all🥹🫶🏼
I am raising a disabled child. They are now 16 and they don't like being known as "the disabled child." They don't want to be inspiration porn. They are so much more than their disability and they want people to see that. As a small child they didn't realise that was happening (not as a family vlogger) and it hurt to realise it. There are ways to share about a condition and its struggles and parenting without showing your child or exploiting them.
So true. My son is 33. He has Progressive MS and he doesn't like it when my family comes over and they always want to discuss his MS. He's more than his disability.
I live in Utah so I am all too familiar with family accounts, both blogging and vlogging. The original mommy bloggers were Utah moms. I can still recall things I learned about people’s kids on their blog or instagram in like 2008. I should never have known these intimate details of their lives. I didn’t realize it was an issue until many years later when my sisters had kids and I felt so protective of my nephews and nieces and their experiences. It’s still a huge problem and I hope that the our state government will listen seriously to Shari and make some changes, though I doubt they will, unfortunately.
Unfortunately I'm afraid of the world, of people & there are way too many "creeper's" out there & I would be terrified to put my children out there like that. I'd rather be safe than sorry.
my husband doesn't follow true crime like i do and he was every bit as pissed when i told him about Ruby Franke. no child deserves what those kids went through and i hope they're healing from this now that she is incarcerated
Can we please open the discussion for ALL children exploited by their parents while growing up, with little to no protection from it, and the people who see it happening but say nothing or consciously choose to turn a blind eye. The problem of underprotected, exploited children is absolutely rampant, in many, many ways.
I don’t have kids. I won’t have kids. I LOVE the kids I’m ’auntie’ to, I’m so blessed I get to hang out with my friends kiddos. I would walk through fire for these babies. I also recently looked at baby photos of me from the 90’s, and looking at those photos brought back great memories I got to share with my mom. My friends with kids *might* share the ‘official’ pictures of their children - like the school photo or something, but the rest of the time, if they share a cute photo, the kids faces are blurred or emoji’d out. Privately, and because we live around the globe, I get sent pics, but we all agree we NEVER share the kids pics publicly. EVER.
I knew a couple who are very into cosplay, and included their kid in their hobby. Sometimes they include their kid in photos and clips, which are mostly meet-and-greets with character actors, or huge group photos at conventions. The kid is rarely the focus of the video clips; the focus was more on the costumes, events, and the adult character actors' reactions. The kid mostly "went along with whatever" when they were younger, but when they got older, their parents set a rule where were all the kid has to say is "no" and the camera is gone, and any recorded or posted content is gone, no questions asked- even old photos and clips are removed if the kid wants them gone. I honestly and genuinely believe if that kid asked for it, the whole account would be wiped clean to the best of the parents' abilities. Obviously it's not a perfect situation, but giving the kid the control and the right to decide is something I respect a lot.
In the words of Ringo Starr, "I love kids; I used to be one." You don't have to be a parent to care about the safety of children. When I went trick-or-treating with my bros kids, I asked before taking pics, made assurances that they wouldn't be posted anywhere, and even asked permission before showing my coworkers. Even if my bro and SIL posted pics (they usually don't), it's not getting posted by me. My nieces and nephews can't consent to their likeness being online.
It’s not even 15% of the total earning from the vlog that gets set aside for the kids-it’s 15% of the portion that is deemed to belong to the kids! So the parents can still spend 85% of the kids’ earnings.
I hope this also kicks off a conversation about CA. I see far too many videos and posts online about “my kid didn’t like dinner so now they’re not allowed to eat until breakfast / until they finish dinner”. That’s called CA! It’s not a punishment to withhold food, it’s CA! And even if it’s done in a non-abusive way, it’s going to cause a seriously unhealthy relationship with food and mealtimes (speaking from experience)
Same. There's this thing in dogs called "food aggression", and it's caused by them having food denied while they're puppies (either intentionally or just by the situation they're in, you see it in strays a lot). Where it isn't documented as well is in humans. My siblings and I all have what in dogs would be labeled as food aggression, we get irrationally angry if someone even jokes about taking our food. Why? Because we grew up with food insecurity, and food was used as a punishment. Now we all have huge issues around food.
@ my husband grew up in a house with limited food and it’s taking decades for him to rewire his brain now that we can afford food consistently. This stuff causes lifelong trauma
Thank you for saying something about this. I have to see a dietician as an adult because I have a bad relationship with food. I used to be so fixated on finishing all of the food on my plate that it impacted my eating habits...
That's not necessarily a punishment. That's just boundaries, if it's done kindly. You make dinner, have at least one thing that the child likes/doesn't mind, and they can choose how much of each part of dinner they want to eat. And if it's very little, the parents don't make a big fuss. There's no punishment. The child is requested to be polite (like "no thanks, I'd rather not" instead of "gross!") but that's it. And breakfast is the next meal. You don't want to end up in a mom=short order cook situation. Kids go through picky stages and it's fine not to cater to that. Probably they're not in a growth spurt.
I love how respectful of the children you are while talking about their experiences. I bet they would be appreciative of someone thinking of them if they watched!
It shouldn’t be a privilege, BUT considering the fact that 18% of all children in the US experience food insecurity every year (and that’s a growing number btw) unfortunately the fact is that it IS a privilege. It absolutely shouldn’t be, but it certainly is.
@@AshleyfromTX Well....if you live in USA it's a privilege. In most other countries there are human rights laws where "the right to food" is a LAW. ...and people still say that the US is a first world country. LOL!
This is absolutely insane, 10-15% should be considered indentured servitude . There are child labor laws in Hollywood, so why haven't they crossed over for vlogging? It is the same thing. The children who are the entire company get paid scraps. 😢😢😢😢
I may be misunderstanding what I've been reading about the law, but it's 10-15% has to be put into a savings account for when they turn 18, but the total compensation is supposed to be greater than that. However, only 10-15% must go to savings, while additional compensation can go directly to the child (which still problematic if you ask me.) I just wanted to clarify that this isn't what is expected to be fair compensation, just this is the portion that has to go to their future selves so they have something to start their adult lives.
What happened to child labor laws? I was told I wasn't allowed to work when I was a child because of child labor laws. I was seven years old when I wanted to start my business for selling my crochet and paintings but I was told I was too young to work.
Child labor laws weren't made for family business. And even though a lot of it had been adapted and amended, the concept of vlogging is still extremely new. We're talking about one generation, were still in the process of defining things. NOW we have proof how harmful vlogging content is because NOW the victims are old enough and articulate enough to speak up. So NOW policy makers can move their tails and actually address the issue
Imagine being in an adult relationship, your partner offers to take you on a nice trip, and you feel like you have to pay them back in some form or fashion. You feel like it’s a bribe for some sort of behavior. I have to imagine that is how some of these former child influencers will feel at some point in their lives.
Shari is INCREDIBLY brave. Who knows hiw many people she's helped/will help with her testimony. Using trips and experiences as bribes is especially horrific when a child is pressured to do or say something very personal on camera and they feel they have no choice. Suppose a young girl is promised a family trip to Disneyland if she talks about her period. If she refuses, then her siblings miss out on a trip to Disney, and they'll blame her. She won't feel that she really has a choice. 😞
Saying they should be grateful is like telling someone they should be grateful that their job gives them a paycheck. I’m not grateful when I get my rightfully earned money, because its not it’s not given to me without expectations.
I have been waiting for this video. I’m so interested in what she has to say. Social media twisted so much about the story. It’ll be good to hear from someone who was actually there.
Next step will be a law declaring the kids independent contractors, even if it should be illegal. You cant be excluded from getting appropriately paid if you are an essential part of the business. And i ask, are kids an essential part of family blogging? 😤😤😤
Having this be unregulated will lead to people specifically having children to exploit for views then abandoning them at 18 and keeping the money. Not implementing regulation means the government is OK with that. I do not understand why the child worker (eg child actor) laws not automatically apply here.
Right?! With how chaotic life is about to be the next 4-10 years... Ughh that's chilling, there absolutely will be children born simply to make content with 🤬😭😫
We ask our son to share his photos and stories on Facebook, even with my Facebook being solely family and friends (about 80) and completely set to private. Children are whole ass people and deserve to be treated as such.
The only reason people think other family bloggers are perfectly fine and the Frankes are an outlier is because that's what they show you. You don't know what happens when the camera is off.
I am a mother of four kids, three over 19, and my youngest is 12. I asked my youngest about starting a family vlog, and she said, "Hell no, I don't want people watching me. I don't want pedos staring at me." She said enough, and I never brought it up again.
There’s undue pressure on the kids to comply. If any one kid doesn’t consent to a family vacation or do a good enough job on group content, their siblings suffer for it. The family doesn’t take the vacation; everyone has to keep filming until everyone performs to expectations. Or the kid who objects gets left behind, or punished until they fall into line. It’s really weaponizing family relationships.
What an incredible woman. What shall we dip into next?
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Liiiisten, I have absolutely used the aftershave ball cream on my face on the rare occasion that I actually shave it. My wife uses it in her armpits. Good stuff!
You Know you could just let her testimony play and THEN comment.
And just when I thought I couldn't hate the Frankey parents anf the rest of the family vloging any further.
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Let’s not forget, Shari has aunts that are family vloggers as well. She is not just speaking out against Ruby, she is speaking out against her cousins’ parents and that is incredibly brave of her. I hope Shari gets everything she wants, needs and deserves after everything she has been through. ❤
Honestly, it sounds like a nightmare, being forced to 'act' in your own life, it's so awesome of her to try and bridge the gap of understanding so that the regulators know what it is they're regulating. How can you protect people if you don't understand what's happening to them?
This! They are both nuts too!
Bonnie is the worst! I don’t follow her, I just get the snark from DCP 😂
Ellie had taken time off and I was hoping that if/when she returned it would be with less of the kids but that doesn't seem to be the case. :/
@@donnamarie- Right! Josh is great! I hope he also reacts to Shari's stand!
just an idea.. demonitize content with children. you can post your kids, ya just won’t get paid for it. i imagine the quantity of content and exploitation will drastically decrease.
And hopefully the “trauma” of having your first period!
THIS!!! Couldn’t agree more
Absolutely!
YES!
I love this idea
I'd like to see an adult child of a family vlog sue their parents for violation of privacy.
They should all sue for invasion of privacy.
Thankfully, I am sure that that's going to start happening in the future, once the children of current and recent vloggers grow up, as it should.
I can't wait for laws to pass that basically count children in youtube videos as child actors and owed a portion of profits made from said videos.
absolutely
I read that as vlog their parents that would be interesting
Notice she didn't "my mom." She said "Ruby."
Because Ruby was her employer, not her mother.
Ruby lost any right to being called a mother years ago
Ruby is lucky she didn’t call her ‘the criminal in question’ .
I've noticed based off her social media she only refers to ruby as Ruby or my Mother never mom… which she lost the right to being “mom”
My best friend usually refers to her awful mom as “my egg doner”
Ruby as she sits in jail right now: "Why don't my kids talk to me anymore?? 🥺" 🙄
She finna join an estranged parents support group 🤣
She doesn't give a damn about them. That woman quite possibly is the devil
@@tianag8513 maybe even _Diane's_ group... ugh😒
@@tianag8513 and play the victim there, too! 😭
@@maryannetesoro8848 sounds about right 💀
It should be flipped, and the kids get 85% and parents get the “agent” commission of 10-5%.
THIS!! THIS!!! Because technically thry are the main earnings.
But, if they are minors, the parents would still end up with control. I'd imagine the kids would never see that money from these greedmongers.
Though my mom didn't vlog, she was an intense Facebook mom. While she didn't record me, she posted hundreds of photos of me to her public Facebook without my consent. I completely agree with the daughters hard stance.... I grew up knowing hundreds of strangers had seen and heard all of my embarrassing moments, photos I didn't want posted. There is no ethical way to post your children to the Internet, because no child is able to consent to content being made about them.
This, same friend. Thank you for sharing. ♥️
I very, very rarely post pics of my kids on Facebook. If I want my family to see any, I send them to them directly.
Even with privacy settings, you can never be sure that no one else can see them. And in my case, even with (what I assumed was) pretty tight settings, my MIL would take my photos and post them on her Facebook. And then my FIL (who I actually had blocked) would get them from her FB and post them to his, with my kids names! I had him blocked because he would not be careful about who he friended, and would massively overshare. When I realized what was happening, I felt extremely violated.
I wonder why parents with good intentions don't just record their kids as they please and then just don't post it. Maybe when the kid turns 18 they can decide what gets uploaded and what doesn't and then at that point deal with the money situation 🤷♀️ that way the parents have that digital timeline to look back on and reminisce and the child (now adult) consents to what could be shown
My mom wasn't quite as intense, but me and my sis always asked her to not post our pics in Facebook and she still did most of the time. They often just don't get it...
Thank you so much for sharing part of your story. I think stories like yours are such a valuable insight into how this should play out. I hope you've found some healing
Kevin Franke better not get off scott free, he may have not directly abused his kids, but his neglecting his kids had definitely impacted the whole family in a highly damaging way smh.
Of course he abused them. It’s in the videos. They were a team.
👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
It looks like he is going to, sadly. The LDS actually cares about the men.
He watched it happen. He was there and agreed with the punishments these kids got. He might not have been there for the Jodi incident but he is just as bad. I mean, what dad doesn't see or know what's going on with your kids for over a year? There really is no excuse for that in my opinion
I don’t believe for a second that he didn’t know or that he didn’t participate. He shouldn’t get to make everyone else take the fall while he roams free.
The fact that “child influencers” is even a thing is quite disgusting in my opinion. INFLUENCERS?
When I see someone saying their job is an "influencer", I have to laugh. What's next, a degree in influencing?? 😆
As someone who’s been forced to suffer under Utah’s troubled teen industry, it just seems like the state thrives off of children. Breaking, abusing, and pretending to care for them.
Utah is effectively a theocracy under the LDS. And they are ONLY about men, so it’s not surprising. I hope you are out of there.
I’m so sorry you had to endure that. It’s awful. I hope you’ve found your own peace, Justice, and healing
Its church ran. Of course it runs off of children.
@ I’ll get justice when the places I had to go get shut down, and the people who worked there have it as a permanent scar on their record.
Other than that, I’ve moved on. My family is supportive and regrets sending me there (the vast majority of facilities lie about how ethical they are, and limit any and all communication. So they thought they were sending me to a place that was better than what it was.)
It’s not just Utah- and I’m so sorry for what you had to go through! Those places need to be shut down
Shari is a great voice for children who are being exploited online. Her speech was empowering and hope her voice reaches even further down the road for changes to come. We need all of the states to put more laws in place to protect kids online
What an incredible young lady to bring this all to light even if this has caused her humiliation, she still fights for the rights of other children! ✌🏻🙏🏼❤️
I was not a fan of Honey Booboo, but the mother stole the money for drugs, and the star of the show got crap!
I have a lot of respect for Shari, yes, she’s a very important person and making a difference
I hope her aunt's have seen her stance! Cuz they are also family vloggers
The law has not caught up to the internet yet sadly
Shari is amazing. She is making a difference. As soon as she left home, she attempted to rescue her younger siblings by contacting CPS. Unfortunately, their response was insufficient! Best wishes to this wonderful human being!
My oldest daughter (33) had her 1st child in February. She requested, upon finding she was pregnant, not to share pictures of her child online with my Facebook friends or on my blog. I agreed without a qualm. It was not unfair for her to make that request. Since I am in NC and she is in AZ, she shares loads of pics and videos via texting. They are on my computer and while I may show a friend a pic on my phone face-to-face, the child has never been posted by me anywhere.
W grandma. You are setting a good example for your friends and moms of the future
Wish I had a parent like you. I’m literally about to give birth any hour and all my mom wants to do is get her pictures in to post on fb. I told her and my dad absolutely not and no pictures are to be taken. They do not respect my boundaries with my kids. I’m not allowing them at the hospital. It sucks.
@@Lunarj hope the labour goes smoothly and that your parents relent
You’re a good grandma!❤
@@Lunarjyou’re doing the right thing! You’re going to be a great mom!
TH-cam is very much responsible for promoting this type of content. It's disgusting and a great shame that nobody will be held accountable.
Absolutely!! I have even see YT comment on very popular family vlogger channels. It’s INSANE!!
Wanted to mention, it’s the legit YT channel, not a fake. It’s awful. So many children are being exploited.
We need legislation that protects kids. We can’t trust corporations to do the right thing, they won’t.
We need laws to be made that force companies to comply, punishable even at their financial detriment.
It's sad that the TH-camrs themselves to say something. Also, the fact that the audience of the channels sometimes adds to it. An arts and crafts channel I watch, Moriah Elizabeth, has had to say multiple times to her audience that she does not want her two daughters and their names to be on the internet, and to stop asking. But they don't care.
@@cassidythecatI have seen that too. It's so sad that people don't understand why someone may want to "remain private" while still being a public figure.
@@noodlepoodlegirl Illinois has been one of few states attempting to protect kids online.
I think there's a huge difference between sharing your family and SELLIING your family.
True. I watch a family channel, and they are a lovely family with good responsible parents. I don't necessarily want to name them because I'm afraid there are a lot of haters out there.
There is no difference when you’re reaping some kind of benefit from it.
I am speaking to the difference between showing your friends pics of your kids and monetizing their entire lives to pay your own bills. One is sharing, the other is selling.
Utah children services is a literal joke. It is THE culture to treat women and children as possessions. The polygamist compound in the U.S. isn’t far from St George/Ivins Utah (Arizona border/Colorado City) where child abuse is rampant.
I know what I’m talking about. I’m ex-LDS who lived nearby in Cedar City.
Good job, SWOOP!
It’s a different world that I’m learning about. I wish I could pick your brain or you could just tell me about the LDS/mormon Utah culture. It’s fascinating, heartbreaking and super disturbing.
I’ve been nothing a theme in our country: different communities who thrive on punishment culture. They seem to get excited, salivating when it’s their time to punish, when they think someone has wronged, and they package it as tradition or hierarchy, but it’s a giddiness to inflict some kind of hurt upon others.
Anyway, thank you for sharing. I bet you have some stories from your days in Utah, and I’m glad you’re free. 💙
@@noodlepoodlegirl Mormonism is a cult, plain and simple.
@@noodlepoodlegirlI see that giddiness for punishment in progressive circles too, primarily in people who are exvangelical or other high control groups. Like they ditched one dogma for another. I really wish people would see the patterns more.
@@noodlepoodlegirlIt’s legitimate sadism rationalized as justice. In other words, barbarity.
@Heydodoakskdkdjf I've noticed that too! There are so many younger Millennials and Gen Zers who superficially look like they carry progressive beliefs, but when you look closer, it's like they only changed superficially and not deep down. They still appeal to authority, think in terms of black and white, proselytize, struggle with nuance/ambiguity and the unknown, socially ostracize and eviscerate people who don't conform to the group's ideas, try to force people into roles and boxes, and insist on an us versus them mentality (a zero-sum mentality). It makes me realize that these people... while they might've stopped with the "homosexuality is a sin" sort of talk, they really haven't deconstructed in any other sort of way. To continue with that example, they just moved from "being gay is a sin" to "being a homophobe is a sin", in terms of evolution.
When my sister had her little lad, she was insistent that his face never be posted online. I never understood at first, but the more I see about Family Vlogging and how children are impacted once they’re grown up, the more I get it now. My heart goes out to these poor kids.
My daughter asked us not to post our granddaughter to much on Facebook, but its not only for her mental well-being later on but also due dad’s job. I mostly ask if i can share our granddaughter with our flyball team members but that’s a private account.
i felt the same way. i remember when i was sixteen i thought my aunt's stances on screen time and social media were so weird and dumb. now i'm in my 30s and i get it.
And they can take AI and do whatever they want with the pictures of your child
@@Nikkinitelitethis! Deep fake tech has gotten more advanced, and unfortunately will be more and more frequently used in production of illegal content
My younger sister is very private. She doesn’t have any social media. She has two minor kids. My brother has minor kids, too. I don’t post any of these kids faces. I always cover their faces or crop them out. So I don’t post even adults that have told me not to. We should respect others.
I wonder is her aunts will take what she says seriously and stop putting their own kids online?
Good question and absolutely not! If what happened to their nieces and nephews did not cause them to stop absolutely nothing will! Remember Bonnie’s statement after Ruby was arrested? She was basically telling the world they would continue with family vlogging.
Parents think they own their children, when what they actually own is the responsibility to care for and raise their children, and that can and should be taken away when it can be proven that they are abusing their ownership.
Very well put
👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
As a disabled adult who was a disabled child, absolutely the hell not. We are not here for inspiration. We're people. And if it was really about education about said disability, it wouldn't center the "poor martyr parents." I am so sick of seeing those accounts.
Yeah, those accounts have all the same worst-of-the-worst content that family channels with non-disabled kids have (bathtime, toilet training, meltdowns, bad days, etc), but throw up the "it's EDUCATIONAL!" as a shield and everyone just sort of allows it despite the fact that there are already resources out there that don't exploit kids to give you the basics of whichever disability there is. But like you said, it's less about, "here are some definitions and signs of x in this disability/disease/syndrome/etc" and WAY more about "and this is why you shouldn't give ME, THE MOMMY, dirty looks when my kid has a meltdown in the store because I'm actually a GOOD Mama, and actually deserve a medal for taking my kid out in public at all!"
Inspiration porn is the worst
I once went up to a disabled woman at a conference after she spoke and told her I found her so inspiring. When she asked "why?" I talked about her breaking into a male-dominated industry and her forging ahead despite financial difficulties. She let out a big sigh and thanked me that I didn't say it was because of her disability. I honestly didn't even think about the fact that she was in a wheelchair.
We then had an enlightening conversation about "inspiration p*rn" which I didn't even know existed at that time!
I hope you now have the support you need and are surrounded by people who love you for you.
Parents who use their disabled children to give them some kind of savior complex make me genuinely sick. No it's not heart warming it's belittling.
I came here to say the exact same thing. Why is not ok to share a non-disabled child’s life on the internet without consent, but it’s ok to do that to a disabled child for the sake of “educating parents”? Disabled people and children and two groups notorious for being dehumanized and given little to no agency or rights, so it’s kind of insane to think disabled children are the exception to this issue, and not one of the most likely victims with the least agency given to them. Parents and their needs are not the center of this discussion, and even if they were, parents who exploit their disabled children are not people you should EVER get parenting advice from.
Having watched a few when I was kid, family vloggers with disabled kids are honestly some of the most deeply vile of family vloggers out there. The parents treat their kids like a pet and center themselves and their emotional journey, and they show every single detail of their child’s life, from filming “meltdowns” (that feels like a really demeaning word to use but I can’t think of a less demeaning one) to telling an audience explicit details about bathroom topics. I remember I once saw this one woman vehemently defending putting her nonverbal daughter with Downs syndrome and autism in ABA therapy, acting like the comment she was responding to was “hate” and how dare someone question how she was raising her kid. But the comment she was responding to was from an adult with autism speaking from experience on how much ABA therapy is awful for people with autism. Family vloggers are all unethical but this particular kind are pretty much evil.
Another excellent doc from you, Swoop. One of your very best. As someone who does not watch family vloggers, I had no idea of the evil they do. Invasion of the child's privacy, 24/7 filming when there are child labor laws. Ruby's daughter told a truly heartbreaking story about wanting to mourn alone and not being allowed. And no friends because other kids don't want to be embarrassed. That this articulate and brave young woman was able to survive emotionally is a miracle. In short: she was denied a life by her parents who only cared about money. Ruby AND her husband should be in prison for life with no parole. It's a travesty that they should ever be released!
As a disabled person, I’ve found that disability family content most of the time just infantilizes people especially those with Down syndrome, cerebral palsy and Autism (which I have). Autism moms as we call them, can sometimes make it their whole personality and can give way to a Gypsy Rose situation.
🎯🎯🎯🎯
💯
I came to the comments specifically looking for someone speaking up about this. I'm AuDHD and I honestly find it difficult to interact with Autism moms. They tend to be SO disrespectful to us as Autistic adults and abusive to the Autistic community as a whole... including their kids in the way they portray and speak about them online. It's infuriating, especially when they praise harmful organizations like Autism Speaks and push the puzzle piece on us despite our speaking up about why we find it harmful and reject it as a representative symbol!
Also autistic here and THISSSS
@@NursissisticOfficialI've never seen a disabled child channel that was exploiting the children.
Food isn't a privilege it's necessary for survival. To use it as a punishment/control is disgusting
I believe she didn't intend to word it in this way. She might have been highlighting the fact that there's a lack of access to it in other countries, so to use it as a punishment or control is wrong. You're absolutely right!
She definitely didn't mean it should be a privilege, but right now it is unfortunately. It should be a given, it should be shared by all. No child deserves to starve, no parent deserves to watch their children starve, no person deserves to starve. No one deserves to starve or live in a food desert. She meant well in what she said, Swoop is absolutely so kind.
I worked as a manager of a middle school kitchen and the amount of times I was supposed to THROW AWAY good food while there were a bunch of kids who couldn't afford to eat was astounding. Well fuck that, I fed ever damn kid whether they could pay or not. To be a child with hunger pains surrounded by kids eating great food... It's just cruel. 2 of those angels didn't even eat over the weekends. So every Friday we hooked them up, emptied their backpacks in my office and filled both bags with milk, sandwiches, cereals their younger siblings would like, vegetables, cookies, juices, whatever they wanted. None of us ever got caught but if we had we would've been fired and prosecuted by USDA because it's their property technically. Miss those kiddos. No child deserves to be hungry.
Sorry for the novel!!!
@Rainy-In-The-Desert no. Food is not a privilege, it's needed to live. I know you guys are trying to defend her wording, but you all are wrong as well. I believe Swoop thought the word was appropriate, why I don't know.
@@Rainy-In-The-Desert middle school cafeteria manager? Sure. Anyway,at any school,of you don't pack or pay for lunch,as a parent and former child,they'll give you a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, milk,etc. Let's not forget FREE LUNCH,is real,even in high school.
She needs to speak before the US CONGRESS & SENATE!!! Blessings and Peace ✝️❤️
Agreed. America need to wake up about this case.
I'm very anti family vlogs now. I used to post my nieces, we would do fantasy/fairies/fashion photoshoots with candid videos. one of the videos blew up and got 40k views and I was offered to monetize my channel. while I was thinking about it, I was notified by a comment that the reason that video got so many views was because it was saved on a pedo playlist. I privated all the videos with my nieces and didn't look back. I only post my kids to my private profiles for distant family and my kids are never shown publicly. just don't do it.
I am so sorry that this happened to you. Especially when you were doing something from such an innocent point of view. There will always be awful people who view a video in a completely different manner than you or I.
Thank you for being a responsible person❤
thank you for self reflecting your behavior and realizing what effect that can have on the safety and mental health of your nieces. you made the right decision by stopping to share them publicly and i'm sure when they are old enough to fully grasp the extend of what happens when their childhood pictures and videos are shared they will be thankful that you stopped it and protect them instead, so their beautiful childhood memories aren't tainted because of the comments people made about them or that they were used by pedos for different purposes. it's not easy to recognize and accept that you made a mistake and change for the better, so i'm really proud of you! i'm sure you are a great aunt! 💕
I'm a little surprised it hadn't occurred to you already re the playlist comment, but well done on safeguarding your nieces.
@@sarahholland2600 it was more than 10 years ago, I wasn't internet savvy at all, and youtube was very different at the time. there was no notice of "this video was added to a playlist" or anything. I only knew cuz someone ether left a comment on the video itself or sent me a youtube message.
Personally I've always preferred the way "Maybe even us" flows better. Something about that extra syllable is *chef's kiss* to my brain. Whatever you decide to do, it is your channel and ultimately, the rest of us are along for the ride. Thank you for another dip into the suspool!
I was gonna say the same thing “maybe even us” is just so much better
It flows better for sure, but I also think that “Or is it us?” gives off a more a paranoid, gaslighty, ‘can I even trust myself?’ vibe whereas “Maybe even us.” implies having critical thinking and being aware of our own biases and those of others. It feels more like “have a healthy dose of skepticism, the openness to new information and the willingness to change your opinions accordingly, don’t just blindly believe what you hear or get conspiratorial to rationalize those beliefs.”
"maybe even us" sounds better to me because it flows well and it also doesn't exclude the topic discussion.
I agree!!
@@ThisIsKatFoodOuuu good point! Love the opposition here
For those who isn’t familiar with Jackie Coogan’s name, he played the original Uncle Fester in the 1960s “Adam’s Family” and one of his first movie was in “the Kid” with Charlie Chaplin.
how dare the algorithm hide this from me for 24 whole seconds 😤 i’ll forgive them this time. thank you for all you do swoop!
It hid it from me for 5 minutes! 😢😢
31 whole minutes!
37 minutes!
56 minutes
3 HOURS!! Unacceptable 😤 💗
The fact that she has to say she's not there to "provide the solution" is exceptionally depressing to me. She's talking TO THE PEOPLE IN CHARGE. SHE is not the person who SHOULD have to provide a solution anyway! THEY'RE. IN. CHARGE. They're the ones who should be told what the problems are and THEY find the solution. THEY search for experts to look into the problem that's been highlighted to them so THEY can find the solution. How the hell is a singular person without any power supposed to rock up with a folder of the perfect solution? That's not her job! That's theirs! And shame on them that it's taken this long to even bother at least faking caring about hearing about the problem, let alone looking for a solution.
You are right but the truth of how the USA functions- the burden is on the slave with less power and the ones with power get to do what they want no matter how much it hurts. Until the roots of slavery are destroyed these evolutions of slavery will continue- Survivor of modern day slavery.
I know it’s a problem in every state, but Utah feels especially stupid when it comes to its government (up there with Florida and Texas).
She didn't actually say there's no ethical way to post your kids online. She said there's no ethical way to do it for profit
food is not a "privilege".. it's "a NECESSITY"!!
Unfortunately, in the real world, it is a privelege. That doesn't mean it isn't a necessity- in many respects, most necessities are a privelege because we need money to access them.
Both things can be true at the same time just cause it is a need doesn't mean it is not also a privilege
Ethically, it is a right. In practice, unfortunately, it is often a privilege :/
I don’t think she meant food is a privilege that needs to be earned and more so that as a whole, being able to afford food is a privilege. so to then deny your children of that privilege as a punishment when you have more than enough to feed them is evil.
@@Sharp_cetta agreed, the privilege is the easy access we have to safe food, but it's not a reward to be earned.
For 7 years, I worked a job where I was on call 24 hours a day, and it was exhausting and extremely, extremely stressful. I cannot imagine putting that level of pressure on a child. I feel so deeply for these children, and I’m so, so proud of this incredible young woman for coming forward and standing up for children like her. I’m so glad she’s brought so much of this industry to light.
She was abusing those children in plain sight and it’s sad it lasted so long.
15% is a TIP!!! Not a salary.
Isn't a usual tip 20%? That's even less
I believe the law is misinterpreted in this video, I believe they get an initial percentage based on how often they appear in videos that make 10cents or more, and then 15% of that is put away in a trust they can’t access until they are 18. So it’s just a percentage of how much they earn being put away, but they are still earning more than that 15%. That’s the way I interpreted it.
They should get 85%.
@@forrestfey they very well could be getting 85%, and 15% is being put away in a trust…
@@Nikkinitelitethat makes more sense and i hope that is the case. thanks for clarifying!
The concept of forever is wild. My dad tried to explain it to me when I was little, he said “imagine the smallest bird you’ve ever seen - it flies around the entire world and takes one bite out of the earth per flight around the world. By the time he finishes eating the whole world, he isn’t even close to “forever”.
My mom tried explaining it to me with the "grains of sand, drops of water in the ocean" metaphor I've seen a lot, but the thing that made it stick was actually when I learned of dinosaur fossils!
They were here a reeeeeeeeeallly long time ago, and they're still being discovered. What's going to find our bones someday?
What's the difference between child Hollywood stars and children in home vlogging social media? One has regulations to follow, and the children are paid. The other has no regulations, and the children receive no pay.
And the stars are filmed on a specific location not their safe private place.
Jesus if you TH-cam won’t let you say half the words in this piece they can’t crack down a little bit harder on family vloggers. What an impressive articulate young lady. Great speech. Hope it’s heard
When I was a kid, my parents did “vlogs” but it was recorded on 8mm tapes on a camcorder for our family to view ONLY. There was no TH-cam or Facebook or Instagram. Recording my first steps, my first birthday, my first Christmas, etc. it’s for memories. It’s one thing to document your kids growing up but monetizing it and putting it out there for the world to see is just,.. not okay.
Same, my mum used a camcorder. Nobody saw those videos.
I cannot believe the strength of this young woman. She's been through heck and continues to go through heck when she just wants peace. She decided to continue to deal with this to help rather than hide. She doesn't even realize just how strong she is.
She didn’t have to do this. She probably didn’t really want to do this. Who would? Thrust into the limelight, first by her parents filming her, then due to her mother’s arrest and her family’s trauma, I wouldn’t blame her for trying to slip into the shadows. But she realized she had a chance to speak up on behalf of others, and she did.
I really respect her courage.
Didn't think there would be an update on Ruby Franke at all! Thanks SWOOP!
RIGHT!?! I’ve been trying to keep up with her case, but so many people have moved on, and I am a bit too dumby dumb dumb to read the actually released court jargon! Thank you Swoop!!! For helping us dummies keep up with this case!
Hello....I just found you on my feed. I appreciate the way in which you presented this complicated issue with respect and insight. Thank you.
i’m glad you covered this because ever since the uproar of Ruby’s initial arrest, i haven’t seen it talked about at all. i didn’t even know Shari had spoken. it’s important to highlight the voices of victims, always.
We need to uplift Sherri, and turn the microscope on Sam for his turn in court.
Every video makes it clear that "they are a 'good' little LDS family" meaning the father is 'head of the house', disciplinarian, and decision maker.
Not a fcking CHANCE that he gets to run away from everything he did.
@@B.Harper7 i’ve had the same thoughts as someone familiar with the LDS faith… the man is always head of house. at best he was neglectful, at worst he was actively involved
"Some family vloggers post things to make memories"
YOU CAN DO THAT WITHOUT POSTING IT TO SOCIAL MEDIA.
IT'S CALLED AN SD CARD
or you can make it private! There is no excuse to post to the whole world
Or a brain 🤷♂️
My family has giant hard drive of childhood videos and photos it's great! Do that. Why does everything need to be posted on the Internet these days?
Right!!! Like come on there's no way you can spin it to be "just for memories..." If so, it wouldn't be monetized. There are ways to privately share the files with family members as well. People who try to say it is just for the memories are straight up lying, and in doing so are even more selfish for not admitting the true intent. Crazy stuff.
yep, I have VHS-C tapes that I need to transfer to dvd or blu ray whatever. It's the only way my youngest son will get to hear my mom speak, laugh and such.
Some thoughts:
- would it help to just make it illegal for any childs face to be posted online? Can be blurred?
- can it be made illegal for any personal information of the children to be online?
- can we demonitise all child content?
- can we have laws protecting working hours for child influencers?
- if it does stay monetized, can we have better laws making sure the profit goes to the child?
Shari articulates herself flawlessly. Her words were impactful.
I am a SA victim, It happened in the late 80's, I never told anyone, To this date I was with the woman of my dreams, met in 2000, moved with her in 2002, I couldn't even tell her, we married in 2022 and I told her then so scared she would reject me.
She told me her story, we cried, stood up and the shame was gone.
I wish I could or would have spoken out sooner.
I'm glad to hear you both can be vulnerable with each other. I'm sure it was a huge weight that was lifted.
I’m so proud of you stranger, and also incredibly glad that you where able to find that healing with your wife 🫶🏻 wishing you a long and blessed life!
Thank you for sharing your story on such a large space. While what was was done should never happen to anyone and I'm terribly sorry you felt unable to do so for so long, I firmly believe that someone will read this and find hope and healing.
Once again, while an awful thing that I wish no one has to face, the fact that not only were you able to finally open up to your partner (now spouse) and she did so in turn is incredibly moving.
We all heal at different paces and ways. Speaking as a fellow survivor (who's also known many) I'm acutely aware of the fear you described and sometimes it 'reappears' long after we thought it was 'behind us' especially when we have a chance at forming/cementing a deep connection. What you described happening between the two of you was incredibly beautiful and intimate.
I truly feel there's more than a few people having a similar internal struggle that will find strength and inspiration from this.
Thank you for your story and vulnerability, I know it will have a positive impact. I also wish the two of you all of the happiness and healing in the world. May you have amazing journeys together.
Correct your vocabulary. You're not a victim, you're a survivor.
I'm a psychotherapist and I often say to clients that "just like salt dissolves in water and its ok to cry, and shame dissolves in oxygen and its ok to speak and be safely heard". I'm so glad you found this to be true.
❣Shari ❣She just explained so much about "reality" in American culture. The obsession with clout, money and "things" hurts people. Always has, always will. Just being you SHOULD be enough!! Love your takes on this dangerous drama, Swoop. Always. Much as I hate all of it, always good to be informed. And have compassion for those who Chose to share their experience!!
Stolen Childhoods. This is so predatory, I cant imagine the damage growing up with a camera shoved in your face. Good for you Shari. This issue needs more light shined on it, good work Swoop.
I don’t know what it’s going to take to ban family blogging. I don’t even have social media and I could list 15 horrific situations that have happened because of it. Since we know these parents are going to choose money over the safety and privacy of their children, It’s time for the government to step in! I’m getting my masters to be a mental health counselor and last semester, I wrote one of my final papers on the dangers & long-term psychological/traumatic effects… It has to stop.
Family Vlogging is big business... for the family, the state, TH-cam... it's a snowball rolling downhill and is only getting bigger, Rubys is just the worst, but she's also the 1st... sadly, she will be outdone, and some poor child will lose their life over family vlogging eventually
You do have social media... TH-cam is social media lol.
Ruby Franke is not the First. “Fantastic Adventures,” “DaddyO’5,” and let’s not forget reality TV like the Duggars. Ruby can be credited with shining on a spotlight on these problems. Now we have the Nurse Hannah issue. At the very least, this subject should be closely examined. Former child influencers have the benefit of hindsight and lived experiences. We definitely need to listen to them. But I agree, Ruby will not be the last.
Australia recently banned children under 16 to have a social media account, but-I’m not sure if family members are permitted to post their children on social media. I think it’s a start, but I wonder how they’d enforce it?
Do you think that would help?
You’re right- we need legislation to hold greedy companies and families accountable, they’re not going to do it themselves.
Hope our happens soon.
I fear many right wing politicians aren’t interested in protecting children/child labor laws, and would in fact rather profit from them, so we’ll see..
21:12 the worst part is if you denied doing it more than likely they would tell the siblings like "hey *blank* is why we arent going to Disney because they wouldnt do this video"
The thing that kind of impacted me the most in this whole CA Situation was the fact, that I know how this turns out when no one stops it. I have seen enough True Crime that i have seen similar cases. If he didnt escape, at least one of them would have died. The crazy control about food and exercise is textbook.
All child and animal content must be demonetized to prevent cruelty.
Food in many countries is not widely available, but food should not be a privilege but is a necessity.
I've heard that the LDS is part of CPS in Utah so I imagine that it's hard to have any kind of accountability.
I don't know if the church itself has any involvement with CPS, but I wouldn't be surprised to learn that there are a lot of Mormons running the agency. Having been raised Mormon and with several niblings also being raised in it, I can confidently say that I wouldn't want 99% of people who believe in that faith to have any part in deciding who is and isn't taking proper care of their children.
It's not by chance that many Tax avoiding and religious bodies have so many people in prominent governmental and regulatory positions. It's by design. Like any mafia, the best way to avoid accountability, control threaten and scapegoat is by taking over the regulatory bodies and making them work for you.
They're part of every government organization throughout the entire state, as is the xtian church as a whole in every other state but more higher degree in the south and midwest. It's permeates the courts, CPS, clinics, public schools, etc, and causes a LOT of issues.
Cult behaviour 😬
its not involved with cps here officially, but it is heavily influenced by their practices.
most ppl run to their church than thestate here so they can keep is silent.
I think if religious places don't wish to be associated with grooming and silencing victims, they should maybe start being against it
I like maybe three moms in this state- and its due to them being fully rounded adults that understand this crap isn't right to their kid, caught or not...
I think Pleasant Peasant Media/Momma Cusses/Gwenna does a beautiful job of sharing things about her family in a way that may be helpful for others, and opens up conversation. With her younger kids she doesn't show them on camera and reenacts situations playing the roles of her children instead of putting them on camera. Her older daughter sometimes makes appearances but she is old enough to consent and it always seems like stuff she wants to be included in, I don't think I've ever seen her in anything embarrassing.
@@kadencev I love watching her videos.
Love Gwenna!!! She makes me laugh so much! 😂❤
Yes! And she doesn’t use their names, so the stories can’t be traced back to them. She calls them “the littles” or the “middle” to preserve their anonymity 🤍
Gwenna's fantastic!
I would call her a parenting influencer, she protects her kids privacy and shares evidence based parenting advice.
Family vlogging makes their kids the focus for profit.
Gwenna makes HER mistakes and failures as a parent the focus, yes for profit, but also to help younger parents.
Theres a place for parents sharing advice, there is no place for family vloggers.
I’ll be honest I used to enjoy family content without much thought until I found your channel and helped me to think critically about it. Thank you for opening my eyes to the realities of family vlogs. ❤
I NEED to see Swoop cover the Nurse Hannah situation.
One hundo percent!! That situation is nutty
Yes!
I don’t know what this is. I’ll find out if swoop covers it.
@@sarahwatson3192Another questionable Utah mommy vlogger. Basically Ruby 2.0.
YES NURSE HANNAH BELONGS IN THE SUSPOOL
Banned - children can not consent. It's that easy. No vlogging, no toy review, non of it - you can talk about diseases and disabilities WITHOUT showing your kids or naming them
I genuinely curious, how is it different than child actress/actors? while their lives aren't on full display, we see how bad hollywood destroys kids.
@@twinmama16child actors have limits on how long they can work. They have teachers, agents, and child services on set. They have the backing of SAG-AFTRA. No, it isn’t perfect. But it’s much better than what reality tv and mommy blogger kids have.
Also, child actors clock out at the end of the day. Reality tv and mommy blogger kids can’t quit their lives.
The same goes for child actors then I would assume?
So all the movies with under 18 actors and actressess should be removed, and people who view these movies aren't much better than those who view child corn, it's just a different more normalized voyeuristic violation of consent.
@@twinmama16child actors have financial protection and legal access to privacy laws. These kids are not actors- their lives are being filmed and they have no legal right to compensation or access or privacy. Every single second of their lives can be posted. Yes, child actors have paparazzi follow them and are famous, but they can take legal recourse l against those who overstep
@@tayzk5929it’s different- vlogs are not the same as movies. Vlogs are a persons life, movies are filmed at specific times and have contracts and regulations when it comes to children. There are no laws when it comes to vlogging with a child (other than no ab^se). And even then, some people like Ruby Franke get away with ab^se for years. That’s the problem with vlogging
You should do one on Jon and Kate + 8 their eldest son exposed his mother
Very powerful speech from Shari. She is being a voice for all the children being exploited around the world. I truly believe in time she will make a huge impact and things will change. She’s an amazing, intelligent, strong woman. I hope that she is healing and doing well.
That woman is unhinged if she thinks a pre schooler can pack their own lunch. My daughter is 6 and not saying because she is mine but she is a smart cookie but I would not be trusting her with packing her own lunch the poor kid puts her own underwear on backwards atleast 4x a week she would starve or have the most random stuff
My son is 14 and we make his lunch for school daily.
And God forbid the child have ADHD or something similar. My sister is a grown adult and still routinely forgets important things like her phone, charger, medication, or her own glasses.
Yeah we are still working on candy isn’t an all the time food
I used to pack my son’s lunch when he was 16 for the same reasons you pack your 6 year olds 🤣😂
I packed my lunch at 6... but my parents were pretty awful. Anyway, 14 is definitely too old to be making lunch for your kid. 10 should be starting to help with packing and by 12 they should do it themselves, barring any special needs.
I actually used to follow a family vlog when I was younger. I stumbled across a couple’s vlogs about their infertility journey. Happily, they got pregnant, and vlogged their pregnancy. And then their child. And then their second child. Shortly after their first child was born, the husband quit his job and they vlogged full time.
It was such a gradual process, I don’t think they set out to be family vloggers. It started as them discussing infertility and then snowballed. And their content always seemed sweet and lighthearted, and they seemed like such a wonderful family. But those kids were always on camera. They would sometimes even pick the camera up and pretend to vlog as toddlers.
Turns out the mom in this family is actually Ruby’s sister. I doubt (and hope) she’s as far along the crazy train as Ruby, but when your family income is derived from filming your kids for content, it’s easy to slide down a slippery slope.
Ruby’s sister was totally intending to be a big family vlogger. She got the idea from Ruby. Fundie Fridays has a great video about the whole family tree
Nope…. NO family vloggers!!! Children cannot consent!!! Thank you Swoop!! You are awesome!
We watched this happen with the children with Jon and Kate plus 8 and when their children came forward about being filmed their whole childhoods and how it affected them. But no one listened to those poor kids, but now all of a sudden people are taking it seriously. It must be frustrating for them to process.
Can you share where you saw about them? I didn't even hear about them but now i want to know
True, that was a big turning point in entertainment being children as content.... at least because they were on television they had SOME protection that child performers receive and certain content is not allowed on television. Family vloggers can film anything and everything they choose with zero oversight or laws that regulate the exploitation of kids who can't consent and become the bread winners for their families. It's the wild west in the family vlogging space.
I hate the idea of "these kids are getting nice things they should be happy." my parents took us on a lot of vacations because my dad worked for an airline and so we got free flights. I hated going on vacations. my parents always wanted to take us to places we didn't want to go and do things only they cared about, and if we complained we were ungrateful. I had depression and anxiety and I just wanted to stay at home during summer vacation, but we were always going on trips. Also I get really bad motion sickness so evertime we went on a trip I either threw up all over the plane and airport or I had to take so much dramamine that I was knocked out for the entire day.
Then when I grew up and I tried to talk to my parents about any abusive or neglectful behaviors they did it was thrown back at me that they gave us whatever we wanted (they didn't) and they took us on all those fun vacations (they weren't fun) and we were ungrateful.
haven't talked to them for 13 years. Don't regret it for a second.
I think the wild thing that people fail to grasp is that the children, in addition to not being renumerated properly, they can't hand in their notice and find alternative work because it's their home. It's modern slavery.
Not far from sex trafficking/CP
As someone who has worked in policy making, 15% being set aside in a trust is small but having policy on the books is a really hard first step. In the future this can be increased, getting policy passed is much more helpful than having the perfect policy!
A child should never be forced to do anything they don’t want to on film
Personally I like “maybe even us”
I second that motion
i third. “Is it us” sounds odd to me
Yes!! 💯💯💯
I concur
Agreed
I think Gwen, Mommacusses, does it very well. She has two toddlers who are not filmed at all, but her oldest daughter is allowed on camera if she wants to, and she has conversations about how the internet is forever and her daughters digital footprint.
How old is her oldest daughter? Because even 17 is too young to fully and knowledgably consent. Even the most mature 17 year olds could change their minds as a slightly older adult.
No criticism, just curious.
Sorry just to add, it doesn't appear they've moved to a more luxurious house etc. and most of her stuff is in shorts/tiktok with minimal paid promotions or flaunting of extravagant trips that were paid by her following which also kinda indicates that she's kinda just in it for expressing her experiences, tips and tricks for parenting rather than the monetary gain of it all
i agree with you!
But you have to keep in mind that her daughter is probably 17 at this point and it’s not like she doesn’t know this. We’ll see her from time to time, but it’s also not Gwen‘s main focus of her social media and she hasn’t even shared the names of the toddlers.
I wouldn’t even call it family vlogging. I would call it parenting advice and that she is the focus of her own content. The daughter does appear but the daughter isn’t the star at all.
What about those families that keep popping out kids and have like 12. The more kids they have the more money they make. It's disgusting.
15:20 “There is no such thing as a moral or ethical family vlogger.” Goodness sweetheart, I’ve never heard a more true statement “straight from the horses mouth”. You deserve ALL the praise, as well as your siblings. Such strong young people, my heart goes out to each one of y’all🥹🫶🏼
I am raising a disabled child. They are now 16 and they don't like being known as "the disabled child." They don't want to be inspiration porn. They are so much more than their disability and they want people to see that.
As a small child they didn't realise that was happening (not as a family vlogger) and it hurt to realise it. There are ways to share about a condition and its struggles and parenting without showing your child or exploiting them.
So true. My son is 33. He has Progressive MS and he doesn't like it when my family comes over and they always want to discuss his MS. He's more than his disability.
I live in Utah so I am all too familiar with family accounts, both blogging and vlogging. The original mommy bloggers were Utah moms. I can still recall things I learned about people’s kids on their blog or instagram in like 2008. I should never have known these intimate details of their lives. I didn’t realize it was an issue until many years later when my sisters had kids and I felt so protective of my nephews and nieces and their experiences. It’s still a huge problem and I hope that the our state government will listen seriously to Shari and make some changes, though I doubt they will, unfortunately.
Unfortunately I'm afraid of the world, of people & there are way too many "creeper's" out there & I would be terrified to put my children out there like that. I'd rather be safe than sorry.
my husband doesn't follow true crime like i do and he was every bit as pissed when i told him about Ruby Franke. no child deserves what those kids went through and i hope they're healing from this now that she is incarcerated
She is such a small story in that book.😢😢
Can we please open the discussion for ALL children exploited by their parents while growing up, with little to no protection from it, and the people who see it happening but say nothing or consciously choose to turn a blind eye. The problem of underprotected, exploited children is absolutely rampant, in many, many ways.
I don’t have kids. I won’t have kids. I LOVE the kids I’m ’auntie’ to, I’m so blessed I get to hang out with my friends kiddos. I would walk through fire for these babies.
I also recently looked at baby photos of me from the 90’s, and looking at those photos brought back great memories I got to share with my mom.
My friends with kids *might* share the ‘official’ pictures of their children - like the school photo or something, but the rest of the time, if they share a cute photo, the kids faces are blurred or emoji’d out. Privately, and because we live around the globe, I get sent pics, but we all agree we NEVER share the kids pics publicly. EVER.
I knew a couple who are very into cosplay, and included their kid in their hobby. Sometimes they include their kid in photos and clips, which are mostly meet-and-greets with character actors, or huge group photos at conventions. The kid is rarely the focus of the video clips; the focus was more on the costumes, events, and the adult character actors' reactions.
The kid mostly "went along with whatever" when they were younger, but when they got older, their parents set a rule where were all the kid has to say is "no" and the camera is gone, and any recorded or posted content is gone, no questions asked- even old photos and clips are removed if the kid wants them gone.
I honestly and genuinely believe if that kid asked for it, the whole account would be wiped clean to the best of the parents' abilities.
Obviously it's not a perfect situation, but giving the kid the control and the right to decide is something I respect a lot.
In the words of Ringo Starr, "I love kids; I used to be one." You don't have to be a parent to care about the safety of children.
When I went trick-or-treating with my bros kids, I asked before taking pics, made assurances that they wouldn't be posted anywhere, and even asked permission before showing my coworkers. Even if my bro and SIL posted pics (they usually don't), it's not getting posted by me. My nieces and nephews can't consent to their likeness being online.
I wish those kids nothing but peace. Good for Shari for speaking out on this terrible industry.
It’s not even 15% of the total earning from the vlog that gets set aside for the kids-it’s 15% of the portion that is deemed to belong to the kids! So the parents can still spend 85% of the kids’ earnings.
"people dont like to think critically" i was literally fuming about this earlier this morning!! why is critical thinking going extinct?!
Critical thinking is a skill that has to be taught. Not everybody has been taught.
I hope this also kicks off a conversation about CA. I see far too many videos and posts online about “my kid didn’t like dinner so now they’re not allowed to eat until breakfast / until they finish dinner”. That’s called CA! It’s not a punishment to withhold food, it’s CA! And even if it’s done in a non-abusive way, it’s going to cause a seriously unhealthy relationship with food and mealtimes (speaking from experience)
Same.
There's this thing in dogs called "food aggression", and it's caused by them having food denied while they're puppies (either intentionally or just by the situation they're in, you see it in strays a lot). Where it isn't documented as well is in humans. My siblings and I all have what in dogs would be labeled as food aggression, we get irrationally angry if someone even jokes about taking our food.
Why? Because we grew up with food insecurity, and food was used as a punishment. Now we all have huge issues around food.
@ my husband grew up in a house with limited food and it’s taking decades for him to rewire his brain now that we can afford food consistently. This stuff causes lifelong trauma
Thank you for saying something about this. I have to see a dietician as an adult because I have a bad relationship with food. I used to be so fixated on finishing all of the food on my plate that it impacted my eating habits...
That's not necessarily a punishment. That's just boundaries, if it's done kindly.
You make dinner, have at least one thing that the child likes/doesn't mind, and they can choose how much of each part of dinner they want to eat. And if it's very little, the parents don't make a big fuss. There's no punishment. The child is requested to be polite (like "no thanks, I'd rather not" instead of "gross!") but that's it.
And breakfast is the next meal.
You don't want to end up in a mom=short order cook situation. Kids go through picky stages and it's fine not to cater to that. Probably they're not in a growth spurt.
I love how respectful of the children you are while talking about their experiences. I bet they would be appreciative of someone thinking of them if they watched!
Food is not a privilege it’s a necessity
A RIGHT 💜
Just because not everyone has it doesn’t make it less of a right. It just makes it awful that not everyone’s rights are being given.
@@karadawnruzic9257 Imagine if we spent all the money that are spent on political campaigns and we used it for food for people!
It shouldn’t be a privilege, BUT considering the fact that 18% of all children in the US experience food insecurity every year (and that’s a growing number btw) unfortunately the fact is that it IS a privilege. It absolutely shouldn’t be, but it certainly is.
@@AshleyfromTX Well....if you live in USA it's a privilege. In most other countries there are human rights laws where "the right to food" is a LAW. ...and people still say that the US is a first world country. LOL!
This is absolutely insane, 10-15% should be considered indentured servitude . There are child labor laws in Hollywood, so why haven't they crossed over for vlogging? It is the same thing. The children who are the entire company get paid scraps. 😢😢😢😢
I may be misunderstanding what I've been reading about the law, but it's 10-15% has to be put into a savings account for when they turn 18, but the total compensation is supposed to be greater than that. However, only 10-15% must go to savings, while additional compensation can go directly to the child (which still problematic if you ask me.) I just wanted to clarify that this isn't what is expected to be fair compensation, just this is the portion that has to go to their future selves so they have something to start their adult lives.
The kid should MINIMUM take 70 percent of their own pay.
What happened to child labor laws? I was told I wasn't allowed to work when I was a child because of child labor laws. I was seven years old when I wanted to start my business for selling my crochet and paintings but I was told I was too young to work.
Child labor laws weren't made for family business. And even though a lot of it had been adapted and amended, the concept of vlogging is still extremely new. We're talking about one generation, were still in the process of defining things. NOW we have proof how harmful vlogging content is because NOW the victims are old enough and articulate enough to speak up. So NOW policy makers can move their tails and actually address the issue
@@FaithinChrist3x We have known this for several decades thanks to TLC family content. “It’s a new platform” is not an excuse.
Imagine being in an adult relationship, your partner offers to take you on a nice trip, and you feel like you have to pay them back in some form or fashion. You feel like it’s a bribe for some sort of behavior. I have to imagine that is how some of these former child influencers will feel at some point in their lives.
Shari is INCREDIBLY brave. Who knows hiw many people she's helped/will help with her testimony.
Using trips and experiences as bribes is especially horrific when a child is pressured to do or say something very personal on camera and they feel they have no choice. Suppose a young girl is promised a family trip to Disneyland if she talks about her period. If she refuses, then her siblings miss out on a trip to Disney, and they'll blame her. She won't feel that she really has a choice. 😞
Saying they should be grateful is like telling someone they should be grateful that their job gives them a paycheck.
I’m not grateful when I get my rightfully earned money, because its not it’s not given to me without expectations.
I have been waiting for this video. I’m so interested in what she has to say. Social media twisted so much about the story. It’ll be good to hear from someone who was actually there.
Next step will be a law declaring the kids independent contractors, even if it should be illegal. You cant be excluded from getting appropriately paid if you are an essential part of the business.
And i ask, are kids an essential part of family blogging? 😤😤😤
Having this be unregulated will lead to people specifically having children to exploit for views then abandoning them at 18 and keeping the money. Not implementing regulation means the government is OK with that. I do not understand why the child worker (eg child actor) laws not automatically apply here.
Right?! With how chaotic life is about to be the next 4-10 years... Ughh that's chilling, there absolutely will be children born simply to make content with 🤬😭😫
We ask our son to share his photos and stories on Facebook, even with my Facebook being solely family and friends (about 80) and completely set to private. Children are whole ass people and deserve to be treated as such.
The only reason people think other family bloggers are perfectly fine and the Frankes are an outlier is because that's what they show you. You don't know what happens when the camera is off.
Definitely "maybe even us" 😊
love you swoop💫❤️
I am a mother of four kids, three over 19, and my youngest is 12. I asked my youngest about starting a family vlog, and she said, "Hell no, I don't want people watching me. I don't want pedos staring at me." She said enough, and I never brought it up again.
There’s undue pressure on the kids to comply. If any one kid doesn’t consent to a family vacation or do a good enough job on group content, their siblings suffer for it. The family doesn’t take the vacation; everyone has to keep filming until everyone performs to expectations.
Or the kid who objects gets left behind, or punished until they fall into line.
It’s really weaponizing family relationships.