Wife Wants Divorce & Does Not Believe in My Changes (The Paradox of Change)

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 25 มี.ค. 2021
  • WIFE WANTS DIVORCE & DOES NOT BELIEVE IN MY CHANGES (THE PARADOX OF CHANGE)
    What do you do if your wife wants divorce, should I move out? If your wife wants divorce, is it too late? Specifically, what if my wife wants divorce, but does not believe in my changes, no matter how massive they are?
    If your wife wants divorce and does not believe in your changes, most likely, you’re experiencing what we call the paradox of change, and the valley of resistance.
    And in my experience, when faced with a wife who wants divorce, most people who do not have not a single clue about the paradox of change will struggle to break through. In fact, it might make their wife’s desire for divorce even stronger as they push them further away.
    In this video, I am going to show you what to do when your wife wants divorce, and the ways you can break through the paradox of change and the valley of resistance to ultimately save your marriage from the brink of divorce!
    -----------------------
    💪 [FREE MASTERCLASS - SPOTS LIMITED]
    Learn The Proven 5-Step Process to Empower Yourself to Rebuild Your Relationship/Marriage relationshipsmastered.com/mas...
    🎁 [GET THE FREE GUIDE]
    How to Properly Lead Conversations to open Up & Heal Your Partner’s Emotions
    relationshipsmastered.com/hea...
    🗣 [LET’S GET PERSONAL]
    Interact with me on a personal level on my Facebook group:
    / 1032426806961329
    -----------------------
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    -----------------------
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ความคิดเห็น • 119

  • @GeoffreySetiawan
    @GeoffreySetiawan  3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Hey guys hope this was helpful! Leave me a comment with your thoughts?
    Be sure to check out my brand new masterclass on the 5 Proven Steps to Rebuilding Your Relationship/Marriage. (Warning: Spots are limited)
    💪 Here is the link to the MASTERCLASS! -> relationshipsmastered.com/masterclass
    🎁 Download the FREE GUIDE! -> relationshipsmastered.com/healing-partner-emotions
    🗣 Join the FB Group! -> facebook.com/groups/1032426806961329/

    • @peterfichtner1
      @peterfichtner1 ปีที่แล้ว

      Your stuff is golden man and even your TH-cam videos are helping me so much. I will never be able to pay the 4000 for your program maybe in a few years. But know that you probably saved another marriage so thank you

  • @Mikehighlyfavored
    @Mikehighlyfavored 3 ปีที่แล้ว +50

    Currently in the process of healing my marriage now. Just found you. Binge watching all your videos. Your perspective for us men is what we need

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Do not let anyone come in between you and your relationship goal. Get them back to you and make their love strong like the ocean

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I can connect you to someone who helped me attract my ex partner back to me after separation

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      What.sApp

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      +2348119132200

    • @engineer_zw
      @engineer_zw ปีที่แล้ว

      @@obajeomale1545 how do they do that and how much ?

  • @sgomez1527
    @sgomez1527 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    you’re the only guy who isn’t a complete scam artist and it’s so nice to see the healthy and real way to fix relationships

  • @matthewbarrett176
    @matthewbarrett176 2 ปีที่แล้ว +34

    I'm not a rich man, so I can't afford your course but I deeply want to fix my marriage. I have literally watch everyone of your videos.

    • @serveandpleaseiguess
      @serveandpleaseiguess 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      Same. 4 grand is outrageous to ask of desperate men seeking help. I just sat through 1.5 hours of stuff to only realize I can’t afford it providing for myself and my family, staying somewhere else, eating somewhere else every day. It’s not that it’s not that important ,because it is. But my kids have to eat.

    • @Thearchetype12
      @Thearchetype12 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Do they not offer payment plans?

    • @matthewbarrett176
      @matthewbarrett176 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @Thearchetype12 haha this was 1 year ago, man. I have worked a lot on myself since then. The ex didn't want to come back. She is now with another really low-level guy, and I'm with a smoking hot Italian girl. Good thing I never spent 1c on the ex. 😜

    • @rafydeez2
      @rafydeez2 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Yes they offer payment plans

    • @Thearchetype12
      @Thearchetype12 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      @rafydeez2 awesome. I was prepared to take out a loan looked everything up.about it already. I'm already in the initial interviewing process right now. Hoping I get accepted and can start in the next week or two

  • @christianlamb
    @christianlamb 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Powerful Geoffrey! Hard enough dealing with this resistance yourself, but when you're trying to help clients through this resistance then this type of clear info is so necessary. Thx!!🔥🔥❤❤

  • @MrJeanpaul1988
    @MrJeanpaul1988 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Dear people, Everyone should place a reaction under his videos! This channel should be number one in youtube when it comes to relationships issues. Geoffrey thank you for your effort, analytical thinking and great animations!

  • @aceshi3173
    @aceshi3173 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Spoke with Jason Newman,and this guy is LEGIT.Will be calling Jason soon.

  • @victoriaoshea4865
    @victoriaoshea4865 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    This video is very important now I Have a tool to use when my partner puts app external resistance to my new way of being.
    Thank you Geoffrey.

  • @rickycarter8892
    @rickycarter8892 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I can't even begin to tell you how much just the free information has helped me. Breaking this video down into notes really put alot into perspective for me. It's amazing to me that the information is so challenging. And In a single video.

  • @fifis101
    @fifis101 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Coming across as fake and sounding like a therapist is my biggest worry. She's just going to think I'm up to something and shut down even further. You explaination was so good. Such a clear way to put it. It's going to be hard in the valley but just look forward to the incline and improvement.

  • @xyzpandit
    @xyzpandit 24 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Every time I watch your video, it always boils down to innate human nature. People want to embrace change, but they have to fight their own natural tendency to resist it. Not only do we all have to go through a valley of resistance, but the only thing that helps us through is not just our own definition of ourselves, but also our strong conviction to change.

  • @justdewit
    @justdewit 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Thanks for reassuring me that progress can go downhill. I was making really good progress with my wife and I had a bad evening and said some things. I think the key here is not to throw my hands up and let all of my efforts go to waste. I think I just need to reset and keep going

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Do not let anyone come in between you and your relationship goal. Get them back to you and make their love strong like the ocean

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I can connect you to someone who helped me attract my ex partner back to me after separation

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      What.sApp

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      +2348119132200

    • @Jake.tm_politics
      @Jake.tm_politics หลายเดือนก่อน

      How did it work out?

  • @victoriaoshea4865
    @victoriaoshea4865 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

    10:53. I think it is easier for me to focus on the reasons why... What makes me change my behavior in the heated moments
    Is the principles , the reasoning
    that works for .
    I can't memorize tactics

  • @balupremjith7579
    @balupremjith7579 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Thank you for making this content, I am at this break through. I failed her many times, because of stubbornness, fear, lack of confidence, self esteem you name it. I want to change my self, I can't afford to lose her.

    • @GeoffreySetiawan
      @GeoffreySetiawan  2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Love it! Let's go! If you would like to learn even more please come join me in my free 90 min master class.
      relationshipsmastered.com/masterclass

    • @Rbear266
      @Rbear266 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Man I am going through it and it feels like a minefield… what happened did you guys end up together?

  • @gonefishingisbad4758
    @gonefishingisbad4758 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I'm not married but alot of your videos can be used in life and relationships in general, they help me coup and also understand my ex partner more. I'm trying to get them back but if it doesn't work out then i have this new mindset for my next partner.

    • @GeoffreySetiawan
      @GeoffreySetiawan  2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Hi Gonefishingisbad,
      Yes, nearly everything I teach can be applied in life and other relationships in general.
      All of my clients experience better relationships in work, friends, family and in children.
      Check out this amazing interview below with Liam where he expresses learning these very same skills and how it has changed everything in his life, not just his marriage.
      th-cam.com/video/LSs7y0s0gYg/w-d-xo.html

  • @victoriaoshea4865
    @victoriaoshea4865 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

    14:13 VALLEY OF RESISTANCE 😮
    that's tough
    Don't let having get in the way of changing the proper correct behavior

  • @DeoHosa
    @DeoHosa 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Hello, Mr. Setiawan. Thank you for your succinctly put videos, as always.
    It’s been 8 months since my break-up and while I’ve gradually felt and been doing better, more positive such that I even got cleared by my psychiatrist after the whole treatment thing, it didn’t bring her back. It’s okay though, not everything has to go my way. I’m just soldiering on with my life and cherishing the good memories that I have.
    I have to admit though, now I can’t even feel attraction for the opposite sex. I don’t know if this is chemical or psychological related (been off medication for almost a month). It’s been a rollercoaster for the last few months.

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Do not let anyone come in between you and your relationship goal. Get them back to you and make their love strong like the ocean

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I can connect you to someone who helped me attract my ex partner back to me after separation

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      What.sApp

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      +2348119132200

    • @joestafford3487
      @joestafford3487 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@obajeomale1545 nnji8

  • @fatboycarnivore8649
    @fatboycarnivore8649 ปีที่แล้ว

    I tried to join the Facebook group but it did not work.... I packed a bag today to walk out but had a change of heart...I now alot of our issues are my issues alone and he reflecting it back to me....

  • @Dim4ik2012
    @Dim4ik2012 ปีที่แล้ว

    sounds good. too bad I can't afford a personal training. But I will keep changing and bee - do - have

  • @edgargrimaldo6665
    @edgargrimaldo6665 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Well I wish I can save mine.. been months haven’t spoke to her Or my kids but once a week ago she completely avoids me and contact with me..says she is to hurt been 4 months she walked out on me we had a home and everything..but my mistake is to big so idk how to come back from it.. I feel good learned to forget and concentrated on myself and how to be better. And had the time to accept my mistakes and what was the landslide of my marriage and we’re it went wrong and why? But my mistake she won’t forgive me she said all that when she left. She still doesn’t wanna see me she avoids me and she says she is still hurt and We haven’t really talked. Let alone I didn’t even talk about meeting or the breakup just said hello when she called and how she been..

  • @TericoHarper
    @TericoHarper ปีที่แล้ว

    The ice cube problem really got through to me.

  • @INVADETV
    @INVADETV 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I'm finding my wife is at loggerheads of resolving the new me compared to the old me. I had a flight mechanism in me which isn't in me anymore. She wants us to live seperately, but I'm holding strong. We have a 4 y/o daughter. She needs emotional space now so giving space. I'm thinking wait for her to reach out so I'm not pushy or needy. I would love to be involved in your program but Covid has crippled me financially.

    • @danielgodwin6263
      @danielgodwin6263 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      If you seriously need your ex back there is a very easy way of getting her back

    • @danielgodwin6263
      @danielgodwin6263 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I thought i had lost mine forever until i meet someone who helped me

    • @FlawleZ31
      @FlawleZ31 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      How are things now? I'm in a similar situation with a 4 yr old son. :-(

  • @Thanayreviews
    @Thanayreviews ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Facebook group is no available now

  • @victoriaoshea4865
    @victoriaoshea4865 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

    13:51. BEING, DOING HAVING

  • @jjmartinez8979
    @jjmartinez8979 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I’m trying to change but failing hard every time things are getting a bit better my controlling mentality takes over and I can’t just let her be, I’m tired of being that person.

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Do not let anyone come in between you and your relationship goal. Get them back to you and make their love strong like the ocean

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I can connect you to someone who helped me attract my ex partner back to me after separation

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      What.sApp

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      +2348119132200

  • @ebonhawkarmory5531
    @ebonhawkarmory5531 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Man, I got her to believe the changes I made. Last night she said she needed a divorce. She said I’d changed, but it was too late. There was just too much pain and resentment to overcome.

    • @jimdemichele5479
      @jimdemichele5479 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I’m there too

    • @tb87670
      @tb87670 ปีที่แล้ว

      Any update? Did time help that resentment?

  • @victoriaoshea4865
    @victoriaoshea4865 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

    14:34 Change expectations of growth

  • @cameronjoyce6545
    @cameronjoyce6545 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I’m not able to see her right now just barely able to text with her she said she didn’t want to try with me any more after 3 weeks of no contact later after some questions I asked if she was just done with me and she said I don’t know so there actually was a little improvement through our conversation that was 2 days ago since then I have texted her and she has replied and I’ve kept it pretty light just waiting for the next step to try making her feel safe again

  • @Olalentrepreneur
    @Olalentrepreneur 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

    frameworks, mindset, identity shifting

  • @antoniovega1923
    @antoniovega1923 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    My wife left me 6 months ago, shut herself off from all communication and finally contacted me today to let me know she will be filing for divorce papers and expects me to sign them. She refused to talk and when I brought up about the possibility of taking time to try to resolve things she hung up on me....
    I’ve tried the no contact rule... I haven’t spoken with or seen her in months.... I try to reaching out to her to let her know that the door is always open to talk... I’m just so lost... should I just give up and sign the papers?
    I really want to work this out, but what’s the honorable thing to do?

    • @tracyrose8829
      @tracyrose8829 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Do not let anyone come in between you and your relationship goal. Get them back to you and make their love strong like the ocean

    • @tracyrose8829
      @tracyrose8829 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I can connect you to someone who helped me attract my ex partner back to me after separation

    • @tracyrose8829
      @tracyrose8829 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      What.xap

    • @tracyrose8829
      @tracyrose8829 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      + 2348119132200

    • @tb87670
      @tb87670 ปีที่แล้ว

      Any update?

  • @davidbailey1718
    @davidbailey1718 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Love this guy

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Do not let anyone come in between you and your relationship goal. Get them back to you and make their love strong like the ocean

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I can connect you to someone who helped me attract my ex partner back to me after separation

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      What.sApp

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      +2348119132200

  • @raybo55
    @raybo55 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

  • @bnewman3712
    @bnewman3712 ปีที่แล้ว

    what questions do you ask your partner? like what

  • @dr_hannibal_-drh534
    @dr_hannibal_-drh534 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Tried your methods. Turns out she had already moved on to someone new. It was somewhat of a wasted effort on my part. Still sound advice for those with a chance.

    • @GeoffreySetiawan
      @GeoffreySetiawan  3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I am sorry you are guided by your own limiting belief! Most of our clients are in this situation, and they turn out just fine :)

    • @dr_hannibal_-drh534
      @dr_hannibal_-drh534 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@GeoffreySetiawan I changed for me. So I took your advice. Not saying your methods were bad. She is just a poor human being. Not worth my time.

    • @ddamazona
      @ddamazona 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@dr_hannibal_-drh534 Use everything you learned for someone else worth it

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@dr_hannibal_-drh534 Do not let anyone come in between you and your relationship goal. Get them back to you and make their love strong like the ocean

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I can connect you to someone who helped me attract my ex partner back to me after separation

  • @jamesevans2286
    @jamesevans2286 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    ❤❤❤❤❤YOU CANT MAKE SOMEONE STAY IN A MARRIAGE IF THE MARRIAGE ONLY INVOLVES AND REVOLVES AROUND 1 SPOUSE ONLY❤❤❤❤❤

  • @mcdonnellpadraic
    @mcdonnellpadraic หลายเดือนก่อน

    Has the Facebook group been deleted?

  • @frugalgems5242
    @frugalgems5242 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    I would seriously pay you to coach individually is this an option?

    • @GeoffreySetiawan
      @GeoffreySetiawan  3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Hi Frugal Gems,
      Please check out my free 90 min master class to even see if you might be a good fit for my program.
      th-cam.com/video/LK0gJ7oFciE/w-d-xo.html

  • @victoriaoshea4865
    @victoriaoshea4865 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Have to " see" beyond the visible

  • @peymanestalkhi
    @peymanestalkhi 3 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I dont have money to affoed your course.

  • @joesottilare609
    @joesottilare609 ปีที่แล้ว

    Let her make changes

  • @Youtuber-lv6eh
    @Youtuber-lv6eh 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Man. This is good advice. BUT change comes from the inside. Just leave her. Never be depended on someone else.

  • @Werewolf0216
    @Werewolf0216 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Why can’t it be both, instead of either/or - that is, I want to change for myself and for her.

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Do not let anyone come in between you and your relationship goal. Get them back to you and make their love strong like the ocean

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I can connect you to someone who helped me attract my ex partner back to me after separston

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      What.sApp

    • @obajeomale1545
      @obajeomale1545 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      +2348119132200

  • @justinclark1182
    @justinclark1182 ปีที่แล้ว

    What happens when your wife suffered severe depression and you didn't see it and I was working too hard coz we have sons and she asked for space and immediately slept with someone else, and continues to do do so. 😔😔😔 Suicidal 😔

    • @GeoffreySetiawan
      @GeoffreySetiawan  ปีที่แล้ว

      Hi Justin Clark,
      Check out this story below. I think you will find it very helpful and it will show you, that you are not alone.
      Many of the students I work with had found themselves in the very same circumstances that you are now facing currently.
      th-cam.com/video/FoxjQ_NCuVo/w-d-xo.html

  • @obaidsyed5854
    @obaidsyed5854 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Hey bro need your help she don't wanted to come back am trying my best from last 27 day's but she said that's her final decision...what to do now?

    • @_beanswick2054
      @_beanswick2054 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      If you’re in it for a quick fix it’s not gonna work like that you need to learn how to do the process and not be a product

    • @obaidsyed5854
      @obaidsyed5854 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@_beanswick2054 she's a very stubborn person and the other problem is long distance relationship what I do now

    • @davidbailey1718
      @davidbailey1718 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I'm in the program, wife wanted me out of her life and memory 11 months ago. I'm back home and she feels safe enough to tell me everything. The program is foolproof

    • @_beanswick2054
      @_beanswick2054 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Get some great information from one of his other videos

    • @_beanswick2054
      @_beanswick2054 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      th-cam.com/video/zmV5xBQ1duk/w-d-xo.html

  • @TheColtonStreeter
    @TheColtonStreeter 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I, just, don't like people, at all.