He has told you he doesn't want to be married. File for a divorce, there's no sense in staying. The emotional toll on you, him and the children isn't worth it. Resentment is already there more than likely. Part ways and you both can live the lives you choose.
@@ebriggs3498 He has told her he does NOT want to be married....there is no 'making an effort'. Staying in any kind of relationship with a person (man or woman) who has told you they don't want to be with you is a recipe for disaster. You stay where you are wanted....not simply tolerated. Both deserve the life they truly want and they need to move forward with divorce so they can find it. Dragging things out is a waste of time and energy.
Just get a divorce...because you aren't really married...just on paper. This is way beyond normal. Just get out ... and fire your counselor. And get a new one to find out why you would live this way.
@@nataliazakula3400 My most recent therapist laughed at me when I told her I wanted to find out what is wrong with me (not for lack of trying, I am 59 years old). I have ADHD and autism symptoms. She told me at the end of our conversation that she is very social and "could help me with that". Totally clueless.
@@TonyCox1351nailed it. He’s weak and timid and felt pressured by the culture and church to get married as soon as possible. What a screwed up situation.
He's benefitting some other way by being married. Either to keep people off his back or He's got another woman who's pushing him, and he's using the "I'm married but not living together " line. There's something very shady about this.
@@choicemeatrandy6572 Therapists are like pharmaceutical companies, neither one is in the business of curing people. There is far more money in treating them!
If your therapist takes 2.5 years to get you to a point where this isn't good.. you should have gotten a different therapist 2.5 years ago. It doesn't matter if there's kids involved. If you don't want to move and your dating a girl who can't move... theres no future in the relationship.
Unfortunately the therapist will not tell her what to do. She already knows what to do. She doesn't want to take responsibility for her own life. She want's someone else to tell her what to do and fix the situation. Hence her call today. This was a call for someone to tell her what to do with her relationship. It wasn't a call about money. But hopefully it helps and she finally makes that long overdue decision.
What I mean is that 2.5 years is a really long time to go to therapy and seemingly be I the exact state you were when you walked in the door. I'd agree and that's why she stayed in therapy so long. It is just frustrating when therapists are willing to just let you walk in their door for an absurdly long time. It's inappropriate. She's a cash cow for the therapist, and she's broke. For the record... I've been in therapy and I have friends that do it. They make recommendations after awhile of no progression. I've watched people recover from pretty horrific things in 2.5 years. And yes.. therapy doesn't work unless you allow it to change you. Again... there is absolutely no excuse for 2.5 years worth of counseling unless. She's had something like 3 appointments in the last 2.5 years. Then yeah... sure.. whatever.
@@pdxmusl1510I agree 2.5 yrs is a long time! But as a therapist it’s wild how long a person will put up with something they don’t want to face. Waaay too many unknowns to say the therapist is bad.
@@awilliams7796 She doesn’t deserve that man, and he doesn’t deserve to get rid of his home, move into a rental as a family of 6, just to pay off her debts and have no parenting authorities. She lost her first husband bc of her cheating; she should just prioritize herself and four kids.
It doesn’t take 2.5 years of therapy to figure out you were so desperate to be married that you’d put up with this nonsense. This poor girl doesn’t want to see the truth. Friends with benefits and a legal arrangement. George nailed it.
Dude, get with reality. Most people who are older have kids and are working on their second marriage. Isn't a bombshell, haha! Dude sounds like an old maid, and too underdeveloped if he is in the never married, no kids yet category.
@@picadosinfernoBecause they are religious, and they don't believe in sex outside of marriage. They got married just to have sex, which as it turns out, isn't a great reason to get married.
They kept talking over themselves and her, I have so many questions and I really don't think she ever got a chance to fully explain the situation. Sure, this is a messed up situation but they jumped to 'it's over' without a lot of info. It took halfway through the video for her to disclose that she has 4 kids that are legally required to stay in their current school. I would loved to have gotten to hear the other side of the story.
There is no world where being married while living in two homes and not sharing lives or finances is normal or acceptable or has a logical explanation. Especially not for TWO AND A HALF YEARS.
She was given plenty of time to answer, and they didn't really shut her down that much, so I think this is an unfounded complaint. And we never hear both sides on these calls.
@@Guitarlvr01 Can't agree with you there. I bet she blindsided this poor dude by holding back details on the disaster of her life just like she did on this phone call.
I worked with a guy like this. He married a much older woman; never saw her, didn't live with her. She was only about an hour away, but would only go see her once every couple of months. They divorced about 6 months later.
Yeah, there is no doubt that this guy regretted marrying her. What guy would want a woman with 4 kids that doesn't make hardly any money. He needs to break it off right away. She is a huge liability in his life.
There was a very similar call on Delony's show months ago where the lady called in because her husband also lived alone but he didn't wanna sell his ranch so that his grown kids from his previous marriage would have somewhere to sleep when they'd visit him (or something like that). She also had a few kids. Why/how do people get and keep themselves in these situations? 😭
I know a married couple who don't live together. They were living together in a house he was buying, but she refused to work, and accused him of cheating. Then, she wanted him to leave his house and job, and move to Florida with her, where she was from. (They had been living in Texas.). He wouldn't go, and so she packed up and left him behind. They were apart for some time, and then he moved another woman in his home. They were apart awhile longer, and then she moved back to Texas to his town, and got her own apartment. They apparently love each other and are attracted to each other, but they are WEIRD people! He met her when he was vacationing in Florida. She was lying stark naked on a beach. As she was very pretty, she quickly got him.
Once I got myself and my husband a foreign work permit to help with our then work situation. He said he would come to drop me and he would not stay and leave the country in a week and go live with his parents. I told him he would then leave me for good and I cried but I was stern. Fast forward - he came with me and we both worked hard and saved money and we have the best memories from our one year spent working and traveling in a brand new country.
There's 2 sides to this story. She didn't want to move in with him because of her kids. She decided that, not him. And i bet you he said he didn't want to get married under the arrangement of her not moving in with him. She sounds like she is manipulating the story to make him look bad.
Ah, I'm not surprised the hosts started battering the dude - this is true to their fashion. They (the couple) both made this what it is. The desperate one met the cowardly one and now they have this.
I can just see them (the hosts) after the call going off-air realising that they were misled for majority of the call and they were battering the guy meanwhile there was a big bomb waiting to go off😂😂. They climbed on a ladder to pick an apple only to pull down a oversized pumpkin 😂😂😂.
Maybe focus on the children rather than choosing another disinterested man. Second marriages can work, but the odds are stacked against you, especially if the non-bio parent isn't 1000% invested.
The fact that she dealt with it for 2 years lets me know she was ok with it until she started having financial issues. Shes leaving out a bunch of info and not being completely honest. Just saying what makes him look bad.
Exactly. If he sells his home that he owned outright before marriage and acquires another (in the needed school district) after marriage, the home is no longer sole and separate property.
@@kbanghartI agree with your first sentence. For that second one though, I hope you get divorced at the peak of your earning potential and then come back to this very statement you just wrote. I'd love to see what you will say and how you'll say it.
@@jdawsome4899 I wonder if a prenup was done before they got married. If he has anything, I can't imagine that he would marry her without one. Especially when he was reluctant to marry her in the first place. He knew it would end in divorce.
Insane story. I like how Geroge throws in all the Ramsay Talking Points at the end. Get a coach, income up, budget. I mean yeah but she's got bigger fish to fry.
If me and my husband were living in seperate houses when we met, then I will make sure I have a side dude lined up 😂😂😂. Why didn’t they have this discussion before they got married? And what is the point of being married if they aren’t going to live together full time? The only time people should be separate is if the husband is in the military and he’s deployed but coming back home. Any other reason is a “no”.
It's just too bizarre. So they got married with no conversation about how their life would look afterwards? There was no discussion of her just moving in with him until they bought this other house?
I can't even figure out what she wants. She makes 31K. They have two houses. She is renting another house 30 minutes away. And he married her to "not hurt her feelings". Ok.
This is her husband and he has no involvement in the other piece of her life??? Why is she okay with living a double life. This lady is creating her own mess
This lady has called Dr. D's show twice now. I'd recommend listening to the other two calls for more context. My guess is that she hit the guy with the old 'no sex until we're married'. Guy complied at the time and got buyer's remorse real quick, now he's coasting while getting his conjugal visits and putting in minimal effort (because she's allowed it for this long). Cut your losses lady, no matter how many times you ask/how you reframe the question it will never not be bonkerpants.
@@franciskeys9810Well why’d he marry her than. She already had four kids, not like she cheated. If that was a problem for him he should have never gotten involved
@@CD-tw9tv I can only speculate, but my guess is compassion. If we heard his side of the story, it likely includes a lot of effort and expense, and probably pressure from her to quit his job and sell his house to live where she wants.
And you can't afford 4 kids. Immoral to expect this guy to pick up the bill. You probably weren't married to any of the kid's fathers. No judgement but very irresponsible.
She's in denial and won't leave him. He's already got his claws too deep into her. Just like they said, she'll bring this up, and he'll smooth it over just enough to keep this going.
As someone who wants no part of marriage, this sounds like a marriage I could get behind. Not up each other's asses all the time, and can still leave things for them once they're gone. Doesn't sound like a bad deal.
Seems like he wants the woman but not the kids. She has 4 kids and struggling financially and he realizes that he will have to take a full financial responsibility for her and the kids for many years to come. It seems he is not ready for it. Obviously, she desperately pushed for marriage because she needs help. Unhealthy situation. Sad.
That's not the point. He's her husband! He should have cared about her financial well being way before marrying her. A marriage means togetherness in finances and goals. He should have cares way long ago.
Him saying he didn’t really didn’t want the marriage and telling her 2 weeks ago he doesn’t want to be married is not code for I want to stay in this crazy arrangement. What a stupid comment! Both of these two have issues. According to her timeline she’s been in therapy before the marriage even started. That’s either a horrific therapist the likes of the one who is in prison for severe child abuse along with her friend, also from Utah, or one severely messed up caller. Sounds as if she was in no position to get married anyway.
@@hightechredneck8587 To their fiance? That would be an incredible feet to keep four children living with you a secret from someone you’re getting married too. You would need to make sure they were never home every time they came over and the apartment never had any trace of kids living there. The amount of effort that would take is ridiculous. Maybe you could hide something like that from work friends or something, but not someone you dated for any reasonable length of time. He knew, but was being just as air-headed as her apparently.
I operate a wide- range of Investments with help from My Financial Adviser. My advice is to get a professional who will help you, plan and enhance your management skills. For the record, working with Stacey Macken, has been an amazing experience.
Honestly, I'm surprised that this mrs Stacey Macken is mentioned here, came across a testimony about her from one of the beneficiaries on the CNBC news, she seems to be doing extremely well.
I am also grateful to Stacey, though I started with as low as $1,500 actually because it was my first time and it was successful. She's a great personality in the state.
my female cousin was in a thing like this. they got married. The wedding was super weird. She wanted a beach wedding, so the immediate family went down to florida. They lived 3 hrs apart, so they did two separate receptions, one for her side and one for his. The one I went to was 100% her personality, 0% his. I don't know if the one for his family was any different, but it seemed very obvious that he was an extraordinarily weak personality just playing along to make her happy. There was zero unity, zero sense of "two become one" After that both refused to move to the other's city. Or maybe they were both looking for jobs and neither tried hard enough to get one. Anyways, they divorced within a year and she was all hurt because he cheated on her. I never, ever side with a cheater, but the way the family acted like she was betrayed by this terrible man just had me rolling my eyes. It was obviously going to happen. Anyone could see it coming from a million miles away, and I was a teenager at the time.
It sounds like a narcissist who just wants the benefit of a marriage on one side but no commitment on the other. It’s not a marriage. Actions do speak louder than words.
When a Man loves a woman he'll lay down his own life for her. This means giving up his house and buying one in your school district and being a man and loving you and your kids. He isn't giving his life for you or to you. I wouldn't be able to fall asleep knowing my wife was only 30 minutes away. If he loves you he will crawl across town on his hands and knees on broken glass to be with you for one night. Don't mistake your fear of being alone for love, you deserve so much more. Peace
She waited until almost the end of the call to mention that she has 4 kids and she can't move them into his house because they would have to change school districts and she can't do that per the terms of her prior divorce. Still, assuming he knew that going into the marriage, it does really sound like he's not committed to her.
@@BlueDauntless It's a court order. She explained that the divorce agreement with her ex was that she had to keep the kids in the same school district.
@@hightechredneck8587 doubtful. we ofc only know her side of the story, so assuming what she said is true, he has more to lose and she has everything to gain. all he gains at best is a maid, a friend and sex, she gains financial security for her and her kids if she's able to move in and have him support them. we dont know his financial situation but he at least has a home, she is making 30k a year which is literally an entry level job that teens do. she cant even provide for herself let alone those kids
@@Big-Government-Is-The-Problem Exactly. Classic single mom situation. She needs a new sugar daddy, and I think he realized it too late, or she wasn't honest with her situation or intentions till he was in too deep.
@@hightechredneck8587 yeah, he almost certainly knew she had kids though which is a huge red flag, idk why he took the risk marrying her. i genuinely feel for the lady too, because my mom raised 4 kids as a single woman, and ofc almost no man wants to enter into a relationship like that. basically women need to choose the right man the first time, because single women with kids are a huge red flag to most men, especially if those men want kids of their own.
@@Big-Government-Is-The-Problem And I've seen the opposite multiple times. I've seen women lie for months about having kids. I've seen women tell stories about how evil their ex husbands are when they never did a thing wrong. And I've seen women file for divorce for absolutely no reason, other than FOMO. This woman absolutely lied to this guy in some form or another. He got cucked.
pay a therapist for 2.5 years or call the show for the same answer free lol. Not to knock therapists down. This particular therapist just seems to be taking advantage of her pushing the can down the road...
Looks like George and Ken don't realize that the caller was a single mom of four and agreed to terms and conditions of her second marriage. Now after two years she is complaining about something she agreed to 2 years ago.
The caller's being intentionally vague here. She did say her current husband is husband #2 but didn't mention her ex-husband divorced her because she had an emotional affair with someone, and I'm betting it's with Husband #2. He's probably guilty about causing the marriage to end and just went along with marrying her because he felt obligated, hence the distancing and cold feet. That's what cheaters get! P.S. She also called the Dr. John Delony Show and mentioned the cheating halfway through the call.
Typical Ramsey simping. She has 4 kids by another man or men, yet he's the "child" because he doesn't want to move in and look after another man's kids. The fact here is that she has 4 kids by another man, he doesn't want to be financially responsible for them or her 20,000 debt. That's not a "child" that's a man who's trying not to be taken advantage of.
Thank you for saying this. She mentioned children at the very end, until then I felt bad for her situation but I understand the man here and his reluctance. I wonder when she mentioned that to him. On their wedding night? She is shady because she shared what she makes, shared separate living situation, 20k debt but not the 4 kids. That's the issue she isn't forthcoming. That man can't divorce either because she would probably get half his money. He is trying to wait it out until the kids turn 18 🤣
THEY LIVE IN THE SAME COUNTY! Girl, if he isn't cheating, then he might as well be with how little he seems to care about building a life with you. You are worth having someone who wants to do life together
Ok how are you not living together if your married? I moved half of my stuff into my wives place two days before we got married while I was in the process of closing my apartment lease. Something is very wrong here and I pray for Gods divine intervention on this couple and on this woman.
Not uncommon -- I was married 20 years and only lived with husband for 3 years of that 20 years. We were an academic couple and lived in cities with different universities. Not uncommon, not preferred, with academic couples.
Amidst a divorce, I'd asked my ex why they married me, they responded "because i was too nice" referring to themselves. I've still yet to understand how a whole a$$ broken marriage is somehow better than just saying hey, i know i asked you, but this isn't actually what I want to do. Some people are just too effed up in the head to make any sense. 🙄
You can get special permission from the school district to go to school there while living in another district. Especially if there is a divorce decree. This is a ridiculous marriage.
Dave would have lost his mind if he was here for this call.
He always misses the best calls. 😂
And that is why the show will crash and burn as soon as Dave is gone. The rest of the "personalities" lack a personality!
@@BrianCassidy-hb9pg doubt it. Show will lose some viewers but overall it'll be fine.
Right! He would’ve put this lady in her place!
😅😢I'm sitting here thinking same thing: disappointed
This isn't a marriage.
This marriage has been over before it got started.
It never started
God joined the two together, regardless of what an idiot this guy is.
@@jlmoses16sounds like god may have made his first mistake with this couple 😂
@@TonyCox1351 I hope you're joking, because they made their own mistake by getting involved in this fiasco.
@@rrro Yeah. He doesn't want to be married. His actions are revealing his desire.
He has told you he doesn't want to be married. File for a divorce, there's no sense in staying.
The emotional toll on you, him and the children isn't worth it.
Resentment is already there more than likely.
Part ways and you both can live the lives you choose.
This is her 2nd marriage. She had 4 kids with her prior husband.
What a mess!
This might even qualify for annulment of the marriage! Crazy case…..
No, they should at least make an effort, and try….but it seems very doubtful.
@@ebriggs3498 He has told her he does NOT want to be married....there is no 'making an effort'.
Staying in any kind of relationship with a person (man or woman) who has told you they don't want to be with you is a recipe for disaster.
You stay where you are wanted....not simply tolerated.
Both deserve the life they truly want and they need to move forward with divorce so they can find it.
Dragging things out is a waste of time and energy.
It’s wild that you assume the husband is the problem when she’s on her second marriage
Just get a divorce...because you aren't really married...just on paper. This is way beyond normal. Just get out ... and fire your counselor. And get a new one to find out why you would live this way.
Sounds like her “counselor” was hand-picked by him.
Therapists operate on a service model and have no incentive to help fix your problems.
@@BrianW211 most therapists, most health care providers etc…..true. I’m a therapist and my aim is always high-to help and to solve.
He has someone on the side, don't kid yourself.
@@nataliazakula3400 My most recent therapist laughed at me when I told her I wanted to find out what is wrong with me (not for lack of trying, I am 59 years old). I have ADHD and autism symptoms. She told me at the end of our conversation that she is very social and "could help me with that". Totally clueless.
Caller: My husband said he never wanted to get married.
Dave: Sell the husband.
😂😂😂😂
😂
I mean seems like the best thing to do lol
@@xterra4hire Word lol
And deliver pizzas
You handle this by filing for divorce. He doesn’t want to be married to you.
So, she's the legal side chick.
She's his beard.
Provo UT where the caller is from is 99% Mormon. So I think there’s a lot of hangups here that this call didn’t touch on
@@TonyCox1351 Ding ding ding
Totally
@@TonyCox1351nailed it. He’s weak and timid and felt pressured by the culture and church to get married as soon as possible. What a screwed up situation.
He's benefitting some other way by being married. Either to keep people off his back or He's got another woman who's pushing him, and he's using the "I'm married but not living together " line. There's something very shady about this.
I said the same thing…something is definitely fishy about this situation!! 😬🥴🤔
The therapist is the one winning here😂😂
Second I heard 4 kids and therapist. I knew that woman needed semi trucks to carry all that baggage. I feel sorry for that dude.
2 years of $500 payments...$12000 worth of advice and she's still in square one....Unbelievable
@@choicemeatrandy6572 Therapists are like pharmaceutical companies, neither one is in the business of curing people. There is far more money in treating them!
😂😂😂
To quote Dr. Deloney: Behavior is a language. He has all the advantages, she has all the stress.
To quote Dr. Deloney, "Are you safe?"
If she moves into his house with 4 kids she's going to have all the advantages and he's going to have all the stress.
@@og6433That’s life. He married her. He should have just dumped her.
@@og6433 And he knows it.
Yep!!!
If your therapist takes 2.5 years to get you to a point where this isn't good.. you should have gotten a different therapist 2.5 years ago.
It doesn't matter if there's kids involved. If you don't want to move and your dating a girl who can't move... theres no future in the relationship.
Unfortunately the therapist will not tell her what to do. She already knows what to do. She doesn't want to take responsibility for her own life. She want's someone else to tell her what to do and fix the situation. Hence her call today. This was a call for someone to tell her what to do with her relationship. It wasn't a call about money. But hopefully it helps and she finally makes that long overdue decision.
What I mean is that 2.5 years is a really long time to go to therapy and seemingly be I the exact state you were when you walked in the door.
I'd agree and that's why she stayed in therapy so long. It is just frustrating when therapists are willing to just let you walk in their door for an absurdly long time. It's inappropriate. She's a cash cow for the therapist, and she's broke.
For the record... I've been in therapy and I have friends that do it. They make recommendations after awhile of no progression. I've watched people recover from pretty horrific things in 2.5 years. And yes.. therapy doesn't work unless you allow it to change you. Again... there is absolutely no excuse for 2.5 years worth of counseling unless. She's had something like 3 appointments in the last 2.5 years. Then yeah... sure.. whatever.
@@pdxmusl1510I agree 2.5 yrs is a long time! But as a therapist it’s wild how long a person will put up with something they don’t want to face. Waaay too many unknowns to say the therapist is bad.
She should have invested the therapist money in the stock market or simply threw the money in the fireplace
"I don't care what he says. What is he doing?"
Spot on.
Most bizarre call I’ve ever heard on this show
Was thinking the same thing 🧐 dang…
Sounds like Kaley Cuoco’s second marriage.
4 kids…yeah he’s never coming in to move, pay debts & be stepdad.
Marriage on paper is his final offer.
She probably said, marriage or it's over. Then promised him the world and never delivered.
what kind of sicko makes that offer
The most important detail took forever to come out. She has 4 kids. He might want her, but doesn't want 4 of some other guy's kids.
But he married her with the kids...they're not quadruplets and she wasn't pregnant with them at the point of engagement/marriage
@@awilliams7796 She doesn’t deserve that man, and he doesn’t deserve to get rid of his home, move into a rental as a family of 6, just to pay off her debts and have no parenting authorities.
She lost her first husband bc of her cheating; she should just prioritize herself and four kids.
No one bothered mentioning the therapist treating her for 2 years and still didnt tell her to leave, likely to keep milking her for the fees
It doesn’t take 2.5 years of therapy to figure out you were so desperate to be married that you’d put up with this nonsense. This poor girl doesn’t want to see the truth.
Friends with benefits and a legal arrangement. George nailed it.
Tjis!!!!
Really needed Dave here. Needed better questioning and actually let her fully respond.
We need Dave on all the real calls.
It's not as good without him.
Dave doesn’t always let people explain, but some people are too wordy!
@@stephensullivan1011
This is way too weird. Where is Delony when you need him?
He’s following up with both houses and checking to see if it’s safe.
@@Shane_Conrad LOL
She called into Deloney and I’m listening to that one. She isn’t the angel she seems to bw
"My Husband Refuses to Live With Me" is the name of the John Deloney episode.
Four kids by another man. That was a bombshell.
New man made a big mistake and now he's in "It's cheaper to keep her" survival mode.
This is the way the world is going. You wonder why people have debt 🙄
Dude, get with reality. Most people who are older have kids and are working on their second marriage. Isn't a bombshell, haha! Dude sounds like an old maid, and too underdeveloped if he is in the never married, no kids yet category.
Yeah, she dropped that bomb way too late in the call. The new husband probably wasn't prepared for the drama with the step children and her ex.
I knew civilized society was in trouble when Facebook added “It’s Complicated” to their relationship status options.
@@pamcornelius9122And yet people have been doing complicated stuff in relationships way before Facebook came around.
I have a feeling he has another wife and family.
What gave that away? The fact that it’s UTAH? Mormon country ?
I don't think this "husband" even wants a friend with benefits. He just wants the benefits.
But then why get married?
@@picadosinferno Good question.
@@picadosinferno tax benefits, maybe?
@@picadosinfernoBecause they are religious, and they don't believe in sex outside of marriage. They got married just to have sex, which as it turns out, isn't a great reason to get married.
@@AliciaMcIntire That’s assuming a lot based off this call considering she never even mentioned religion.
Imagine Dave was on the show he would go crazy ballistic like hot headed. This is not marriage and definitely a very toxic marriage right there.
If you ever have a bad day, just hear the stories from the Dave Ramsey show like this one and you’ll feel better 😂😂😂
What you think i'm doing here 😂
They kept talking over themselves and her, I have so many questions and I really don't think she ever got a chance to fully explain the situation. Sure, this is a messed up situation but they jumped to 'it's over' without a lot of info. It took halfway through the video for her to disclose that she has 4 kids that are legally required to stay in their current school. I would loved to have gotten to hear the other side of the story.
There is no world where being married while living in two homes and not sharing lives or finances is normal or acceptable or has a logical explanation. Especially not for TWO AND A HALF YEARS.
@@Guitarlvr01actually does work, a lot of us just don't believe it would.
She was given plenty of time to answer, and they didn't really shut her down that much, so I think this is an unfounded complaint. And we never hear both sides on these calls.
@@Guitarlvr01 Can't agree with you there. I bet she blindsided this poor dude by holding back details on the disaster of her life just like she did on this phone call.
@@Guitarlvr01Yeah, I could maybe see some weird temporary circumstances but not for two years
this woman is to blame too, she must have issues that she let this man walk all over her. She should already be divorced.
Enough baggage to fill semi trucks
I worked with a guy like this. He married a much older woman; never saw her, didn't live with her. She was only about an hour away, but would only go see her once every couple of months. They divorced about 6 months later.
She was a single mom and struggling financially...dude shouldn't have married her and he should divorce her. She's after his money!!
Bingo. Chick needs semi trucks for all that baggage.
Yeah, there is no doubt that this guy regretted marrying her. What guy would want a woman with 4 kids that doesn't make hardly any money. He needs to break it off right away. She is a huge liability in his life.
Ramsey personalities are good with money advice, but not so astute with the lying Jezebels that call in playing the victim.
There was a very similar call on Delony's show months ago where the lady called in because her husband also lived alone but he didn't wanna sell his ranch so that his grown kids from his previous marriage would have somewhere to sleep when they'd visit him (or something like that). She also had a few kids. Why/how do people get and keep themselves in these situations? 😭
I’ve lately been watching these videos .
Never ceases to amaze me how so many people can be so messed up. Boggles my mind.
Dave always misses the best calls. Omg he would have ripped her a new one.
I know a married couple who don't live together. They were living together in a house he was buying, but she refused to work, and accused him of cheating. Then, she wanted him to leave his house and job, and move to Florida with her, where she was from. (They had been living in Texas.). He wouldn't go, and so she packed up and left him behind. They were apart for some time, and then he moved another woman in his home. They were apart awhile longer, and then she moved back to Texas to his town, and got her own apartment. They apparently love each other and are attracted to each other, but they are WEIRD people! He met her when he was vacationing in Florida. She was lying stark naked on a beach. As she was very pretty, she quickly got him.
Once I got myself and my husband a foreign work permit to help with our then work situation. He said he would come to drop me and he would not stay and leave the country in a week and go live with his parents. I told him he would then leave me for good and I cried but I was stern. Fast forward - he came with me and we both worked hard and saved money and we have the best memories from our one year spent working and traveling in a brand new country.
There's 2 sides to this story. She didn't want to move in with him because of her kids. She decided that, not him.
And i bet you he said he didn't want to get married under the arrangement of her not moving in with him.
She sounds like she is manipulating the story to make him look bad.
They BOTH look bad
Yup & they are blaming the guy. She had 4 kids with another dude who should be taking care of them. NOT this guy's problem. he's a sucker tho
Ah, I'm not surprised the hosts started battering the dude - this is true to their fashion.
They (the couple) both made this what it is. The desperate one met the cowardly one and now they have this.
I can just see them (the hosts) after the call going off-air realising that they were misled for majority of the call and they were battering the guy meanwhile there was a big bomb waiting to go off😂😂.
They climbed on a ladder to pick an apple only to pull down a oversized pumpkin 😂😂😂.
@@maneli3769You could not have described it better😂
Desperate and Cowardly
Maybe focus on the children rather than choosing another disinterested man. Second marriages can work, but the odds are stacked against you, especially if the non-bio parent isn't 1000% invested.
4 kids vs None... that's the meat and potatoes...
Marriage is hard.
Divorce is hard.
Choose your hard.
single no kids is easy 😊😊😊
single no kids is easy 😊😊😊
@@Absolutely_Allenbut not truly Fulfilling. You'll be alone and sad soon enough.
@@jdawsome4899 Not everyone wants or need kids. Kids are not what makes your life fulfilling.
Or be smart and not even get married
The fact that she dealt with it for 2 years lets me know she was ok with it until she started having financial issues. Shes leaving out a bunch of info and not being completely honest. Just saying what makes him look bad.
Oh man Dr. John should talk with this lady!
Buddy dosnt wanna loose his house😂
He will now!
Exactly. If he sells his home that he owned outright before marriage and acquires another (in the needed school district) after marriage, the home is no longer sole and separate property.
@@BrianW211then he's a coward for staying with her. I don't get holding material possessions above a human life.
@@kbanghart I understand possessions over people. A house will never lie and cheat.
@@kbanghartI agree with your first sentence.
For that second one though, I hope you get divorced at the peak of your earning potential and then come back to this very statement you just wrote. I'd love to see what you will say and how you'll say it.
Actions speak louder than words, lady
Just get a divorce. It's not rocket science.
Then he has to give her half.
@@jdawsome4899 I wonder if a prenup was done before they got married. If he has anything, I can't imagine that he would marry her without one. Especially when he was reluctant to marry her in the first place. He knew it would end in divorce.
@@vickieclark5931 that's a possibility.
@@jdawsome4899should’ve thought of that before hand
@@naomirachel9161 so you know for sure what the guy did then?
HOW are these people even real?! What in the flying fk
Insane story. I like how Geroge throws in all the Ramsay Talking Points at the end. Get a coach, income up, budget. I mean yeah but she's got bigger fish to fry.
I like how they jumped straight on to throwing the guy under the bus, she never said anything about her financial problems 😆😆
He crawled under the bus himself!
She talked about her financial problems but she mentioned 4 kids late into the conversation.
Utah. Of course. Dude has more wives, 100%.
not in provo. he'd have to be living somewhere distant and rural.
Good observation.
@@alexandermarcus7646 an ignorant remark
@@scratch57 Not really. Mormons are known for having lots of wives.
If me and my husband were living in seperate houses when we met, then I will make sure I have a side dude lined up 😂😂😂. Why didn’t they have this discussion before they got married?
And what is the point of being married if they aren’t going to live together full time? The only time people should be separate is if the husband is in the military and he’s deployed but coming back home. Any other reason is a “no”.
It's just too bizarre. So they got married with no conversation about how their life would look afterwards? There was no discussion of her just moving in with him until they bought this other house?
5:58 Ken cracking me up 🤣🤣🤣
Woman pressure men to get married, I watch it over and over again. Emma you are already on your own. You havent come to terms with it yet.
The dude is in it for the tax break.
I can't even figure out what she wants. She makes 31K. They have two houses. She is renting another house 30 minutes away. And he married her to "not hurt her feelings". Ok.
That would have been a good question to ask her. What does she want?
This is her husband and he has no involvement in the other piece of her life??? Why is she okay with living a double life. This lady is creating her own mess
She realizes that he doesn't really want to take responsibility for her kids but desperately wants a guy in her life.
This is nonsensical but heres the clue:
She is from Provo, UT.
My thoughts too. She's from an area where there is no casual sex, so this was as close as he could get.
This lady has called Dr. D's show twice now. I'd recommend listening to the other two calls for more context. My guess is that she hit the guy with the old 'no sex until we're married'. Guy complied at the time and got buyer's remorse real quick, now he's coasting while getting his conjugal visits and putting in minimal effort (because she's allowed it for this long).
Cut your losses lady, no matter how many times you ask/how you reframe the question it will never not be bonkerpants.
Who’s here after listening to the same caller on the Delony Show?
Bro definitely has a couple of women on the side
Actually, they’re probably men, not women.
She's his beard.
I don't think you listened to the end of the call. She has a total mess. He's the one who has his shit together.
@@franciskeys9810Well why’d he marry her than. She already had four kids, not like she cheated. If that was a problem for him he should have never gotten involved
@@CD-tw9tv I can only speculate, but my guess is compassion. If we heard his side of the story, it likely includes a lot of effort and expense, and probably pressure from her to quit his job and sell his house to live where she wants.
If you divorce, stay single. She made a huge mistake and her kids will pay for it. It was so stupid of her to remarry.
How many other wives does he have?
Utah law allows marriages to be ended by divorce or annulment. Take a hint. Read the room. You can't afford counseling. Pay your own bills.
This caller cannot figure herself out. She has 4 kids from previous marriage? Omg.
And you can't afford 4 kids. Immoral to expect this guy to pick up the bill. You probably weren't married to any of the kid's fathers. No judgement but very irresponsible.
She's in denial and won't leave him. He's already got his claws too deep into her. Just like they said, she'll bring this up, and he'll smooth it over just enough to keep this going.
As someone who wants no part of marriage, this sounds like a marriage I could get behind. Not up each other's asses all the time, and can still leave things for them once they're gone. Doesn't sound like a bad deal.
Didn’t know that was even possible 😢
Seems like he wants the woman but not the kids. She has 4 kids and struggling financially and he realizes that he will have to take a full financial responsibility for her and the kids for many years to come. It seems he is not ready for it. Obviously, she desperately pushed for marriage because she needs help. Unhealthy situation. Sad.
Now that she's having financial problems she wants to combine finances how convenient.
That's not the point. He's her husband! He should have cared about her financial well being way before marrying her. A marriage means togetherness in finances and goals. He should have cares way long ago.
Him saying he didn’t really didn’t want the marriage and telling her 2 weeks ago he doesn’t want to be married is not code for I want to stay in this crazy arrangement. What a stupid comment! Both of these two have issues. According to her timeline she’s been in therapy before the marriage even started. That’s either a horrific therapist the likes of the one who is in prison for severe child abuse along with her friend, also from Utah, or one severely messed up caller. Sounds as if she was in no position to get married anyway.
This dude just realized I married a woman with 4 kids.
Given how long she took to mention it, she probably never told him.
Yeah, but he knew she had four kids. They both seemed to make a lot of airheaded choices
@@CD-tw9tv but did he? I've seen people (especially women) keep bigger lies secret for longer.
@@hightechredneck8587 I was thinking the same thing.
@@hightechredneck8587 To their fiance? That would be an incredible feet to keep four children living with you a secret from someone you’re getting married too. You would need to make sure they were never home every time they came over and the apartment never had any trace of kids living there. The amount of effort that would take is ridiculous. Maybe you could hide something like that from work friends or something, but not someone you dated for any reasonable length of time. He knew, but was being just as air-headed as her apparently.
Why would a guy marry a single mom with four kids? SMH
I have so many questions. We needed Jade on this call.
Both of these guys freaked out and talked way too much, she was cut off before she could fully answer.
Exactly!
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my female cousin was in a thing like this. they got married. The wedding was super weird. She wanted a beach wedding, so the immediate family went down to florida. They lived 3 hrs apart, so they did two separate receptions, one for her side and one for his. The one I went to was 100% her personality, 0% his. I don't know if the one for his family was any different, but it seemed very obvious that he was an extraordinarily weak personality just playing along to make her happy. There was zero unity, zero sense of "two become one" After that both refused to move to the other's city. Or maybe they were both looking for jobs and neither tried hard enough to get one. Anyways, they divorced within a year and she was all hurt because he cheated on her. I never, ever side with a cheater, but the way the family acted like she was betrayed by this terrible man just had me rolling my eyes. It was obviously going to happen. Anyone could see it coming from a million miles away, and I was a teenager at the time.
What I hear is someone who may not have made the best decisions and doesn't want a 2nd failed marriage.
I hope she can get some sound guidance.🙏🏽
It sounds like a narcissist who just wants the benefit of a marriage on one side but no commitment on the other. It’s not a marriage. Actions do speak louder than words.
Miss ma’am is a bit manipulative because how did it take so long to mention her kids?
The 4 kids made it make sense a lil bit
This is truly the way marriage has been going for years now. No commitment and no ties. Why even get married?
The husband sounds spineless. If he was a person of honor, he would move to where she is or buy a house together with her in her area.
When a Man loves a woman he'll lay down his own life for her. This means giving up his house and buying one in your school district and being a man and loving you and your kids. He isn't giving his life for you or to you. I wouldn't be able to fall asleep knowing my wife was only 30 minutes away. If he loves you he will crawl across town on his hands and knees on broken glass to be with you for one night. Don't mistake your fear of being alone for love, you deserve so much more. Peace
Ken’s reaction and face had me ROLLING here 😂😂😂😂 by far the funniest call I’ve seen 😂😂😂
She waited until almost the end of the call to mention that she has 4 kids and she can't move them into his house because they would have to change school districts and she can't do that per the terms of her prior divorce. Still, assuming he knew that going into the marriage, it does really sound like he's not committed to her.
Or she wasn't completely honest. My experience with single moms would be the latter.
Why isn’t a transfer in the table. My kids transfer to their school.
@@BlueDauntless It's a court order. She explained that the divorce agreement with her ex was that she had to keep the kids in the same school district.
In the words of Knights from Monty Python: RUN AWAY! Keep running!!!!
Fella doesn’t wanna be a step daddy. I feel that
he doesnt want to raise those 4 kids, that detail changes everything. its ofc still scummy that he is leading her along though
Or is she leading him along.
@@hightechredneck8587 doubtful. we ofc only know her side of the story, so assuming what she said is true, he has more to lose and she has everything to gain. all he gains at best is a maid, a friend and sex, she gains financial security for her and her kids if she's able to move in and have him support them. we dont know his financial situation but he at least has a home, she is making 30k a year which is literally an entry level job that teens do. she cant even provide for herself let alone those kids
@@Big-Government-Is-The-Problem Exactly. Classic single mom situation. She needs a new sugar daddy, and I think he realized it too late, or she wasn't honest with her situation or intentions till he was in too deep.
@@hightechredneck8587 yeah, he almost certainly knew she had kids though which is a huge red flag, idk why he took the risk marrying her. i genuinely feel for the lady too, because my mom raised 4 kids as a single woman, and ofc almost no man wants to enter into a relationship like that.
basically women need to choose the right man the first time, because single women with kids are a huge red flag to most men, especially if those men want kids of their own.
@@Big-Government-Is-The-Problem And I've seen the opposite multiple times. I've seen women lie for months about having kids. I've seen women tell stories about how evil their ex husbands are when they never did a thing wrong. And I've seen women file for divorce for absolutely no reason, other than FOMO. This woman absolutely lied to this guy in some form or another. He got cucked.
pay a therapist for 2.5 years or call the show for the same answer free lol. Not to knock therapists down. This particular therapist just seems to be taking advantage of her pushing the can down the road...
Men who want women's friend's benefits and women who are very desperate in this marriage.
Another call that proves therapy is pointless for most people
Looks like George and Ken don't realize that the caller was a single mom of four and agreed to terms and conditions of her second marriage. Now after two years she is complaining about something she agreed to 2 years ago.
The caller's being intentionally vague here. She did say her current husband is husband #2 but didn't mention her ex-husband divorced her because she had an emotional affair with someone, and I'm betting it's with Husband #2. He's probably guilty about causing the marriage to end and just went along with marrying her because he felt obligated, hence the distancing and cold feet. That's what cheaters get!
P.S. She also called the Dr. John Delony Show and mentioned the cheating halfway through the call.
Being scared to say no to marriage then getting married is like being scared to say you forgot your parachute and jumping out of a plane anyways.😂
BINGO! Good analogy and very true!
Typical Ramsey simping. She has 4 kids by another man or men, yet he's the "child" because he doesn't want to move in and look after another man's kids.
The fact here is that she has 4 kids by another man, he doesn't want to be financially responsible for them or her 20,000 debt.
That's not a "child" that's a man who's trying not to be taken advantage of.
So why did he get married???
Thank god someone can see reality
@@TheDjcarter1966taxes duh
Thank you for saying this. She mentioned children at the very end, until then I felt bad for her situation but I understand the man here and his reluctance. I wonder when she mentioned that to him. On their wedding night? She is shady because she shared what she makes, shared separate living situation, 20k debt but not the 4 kids. That's the issue she isn't forthcoming. That man can't divorce either because she would probably get half his money. He is trying to wait it out until the kids turn 18 🤣
@@AdultZenfulColoring common sense aint so common but you got it my guy
THEY LIVE IN THE SAME COUNTY! Girl, if he isn't cheating, then he might as well be with how little he seems to care about building a life with you. You are worth having someone who wants to do life together
Ok how are you not living together if your married? I moved half of my stuff into my wives place two days before we got married while I was in the process of closing my apartment lease. Something is very wrong here and I pray for Gods divine intervention on this couple and on this woman.
Not uncommon -- I was married 20 years and only lived with husband for 3 years of that 20 years. We were an academic couple and lived in cities with different universities. Not uncommon, not preferred, with academic couples.
Amidst a divorce, I'd asked my ex why they married me, they responded "because i was too nice" referring to themselves. I've still yet to understand how a whole a$$ broken marriage is somehow better than just saying hey, i know i asked you, but this isn't actually what I want to do. Some people are just too effed up in the head to make any sense. 🙄
Bizarre. She's delusional
LOL. I can’t believe Ken asked about conjugal visits 😂
We do have odd people in Utah due to a large cult following out here. 🤷♂️
I scrolled and scrolled to finally find this comment - sounds like a Utah situation we’ve heard about before. 😮
Okay so time to split.
You can get special permission from the school district to go to school there while living in another district. Especially if there is a divorce decree. This is a ridiculous marriage.