As a Dutch person, another thing I'd add to the list is that Dutchies should stop confusing directness with rudeness. Too often I hear the excuse of 'I'm just saying what I think' to be rude and actually offend people. I do really appreciate directness in terms of expressing needs and expectations though, I find it helps to save time and bring clarity in work projects and to prevent conflict.
I agree. Big fan of directness and honesty here. But insulting ppl or acting entitled or even discriminating, and then saying you’re just being honest and direct, so not ok.
@a.e.gresel312 no, not true, we have plenty of negative things in the Netherlands, you are being a A..hole, how's that!! He can still.point out those things, you are not direct, you are rude!!
@@exploringtheforeign Doe noâhmaal man, wat un k*t video, je denk toch nie dattik me rugzak voâh iemand weghaal en de plek mot deile met wellich iemand die stink.En al die bùitelandâhs die hun ège taal spreike in de bùiteluch nie te doen gewaun. Zeggie nâh dat we nie teige kritiek kunnûh? Wat un onzin. En warom zâh ik me hande wasse na ut gebrùik van un aupebaah plei? Alles wattik daahna mot anrake is toch sowieso al vies. En nie zau zèke, as iets nie maugelijk dan is ut nie maugelijk, zau makkelijk is dat. En asje nie klaagt krèggie nauit wat je wil. Dus laat ons maah lekkâh klage en bemoei je mejje ège zakûh. E asje mèn baudschap nie met un korrel zâht neimp, hebbie gein humoâh.
From a Dutchie: all true, but having lived abroad I find the most annoying trait is the inability to say sorry when you bloody well know you're in the wrong.
Yes! I have lived abroad too, and saying sorry is just common decency and not a crime! Here it's simply unheard of and just creates so much negative feelings towards each other when a simple Sorry would just be enough🙏💯🫶
In restaurants and shops I don't mind the "not possible" rule so much. In America the customer is considered king, but in the Netherlands you're a guest. I like that mindset much more, because some people take the "customer is king" mentality to the extreme. Having the feeling you're a guest means your shopping/restaurant experience we'll be much more pleasant and humbling. Respect the people that serve you, that kind of mindset. And of course that respect needs to go both ways. Be generous and kind to your guests.
I prefer something in the middle. The "customer is king" mentality definitely leads to some rotten behaviour in the US, but the "not possible" (or as I prefer to see it, the "what the hell do you want") attitude from Dutch store clerks isn't great either. We've never had much of a service oriented culture here. But things are improving though; compared to 20 years ago most store clerks are way more friendly and helpful.
Imo there should be a middleground, as Kaasmeester said already. I think changes should be possible for people with allergies etc etc, but the customer shouldn't be allowed to just ask for so many changes that the food becomes a whole seperate dish :)
Would the presenter have been willing to pay extra for the additional workload caused by their request? If not, why should a business go out of their way without being able to charge a higher price. If you have a more “reasonable” request (no cheese please), they are generally accommodating even without you having allergies
My grandma had a shop for a while. She used to say"De klant is koning maar ik ben Keizer" and I absolutely love that statement. (The customer is king but I am Emperor)
As a german, I never knew, how similar dutchies and germans are at some points. Like complaining, rudeness/ directness or speaking english with foreigners who try to speak our language 😉. When I watched 'Ted Lasso', I thought, the american film makers just confused the germans and the dutch. But now I see, maybe they have a point. But for me, the dutchies are very nice people, much nicer then some germans 🤗 Allways love to visit your country ❣️❣️ Greetings from Berlin 😎
Juwen7908 als ik Nederlands praat in Nederland krijg ik zelfs al commentaar van Duitsers dat ik tegen hen Duits moet praten in mijn eigen land. So what you said that the German people switch emedaily to English is not true
As a Dutch person, I mostly approve of this message. I get annoyed when I have to tell my order in English. Now it is true Dutch people will a lot of times answer you in English. However, there is a flip side. I have seen international students and expats put an arrogant tone of why don’t you just speak English towards me attitude. In Hospitality, it is a great opportunity how to learn to take an order in Dutch. I speak 6 languages and I always learned the languages in the countries I lived in out of respect as a guest in that country.
Yes I agree, it is not that I mind speaking English althoug we are in the Netherlands it is the tone and arrogant attitude that bothers me. As if it is strange for me to talk Dutch instead of English
Ja, zucht...., ik denk dat als je ergens lang genoeg woont, je niet alleen de voordelen zult leren kennen, maar ook de nadelen. In elk land is er de mix van goed en slecht. Nederland is geen paradijs, bij lange na niet. We proberen echter wel de voordelen in verhouding tot de nadelen te laten preveleren. Ik kan nog veel meer nadelen opnoemen omdat ik hier ben geboren en ik hier ben opgegroeid. De mentaliteit hier echter is wel zo dat als we bij elkaar gaan klagen, je medestanders zult vinden en door middel van collectiviteit kan trachten het probleem op te lossen. Klagen is aan de ene kant voor sommige mensen een manier van leven, maar aan de andere kant heeft het ook een sociale functie: Als je genoeg medestanders kunt vinden kun je er met elkaar iets aan doen.
Several years ago I was working for a bit in the Netherlands. I found I really enjoyed it so I started trying to learn Dutch on Duolingo. I tell the client I'm working with and he's like, "No, don't learn Dutch. It's useless. Nobody speaks Dutch." He was dutch. I really picked up more Dutch from getting food at hole-in-the-wall Indonesian and Turkish places since they didn't speak any English.
With a lot of us, we think it's cool that you want to learn our language. We really do appreciate it, but most us wouldn't like to teach you all that much, because "Why would you?" Learning English, French, German or Spanish, we understand, because those are some of the biggest and most used languages in the world. So we struggle a lot when people are learning Dutch 😂
He's speaking the truth tho, we have a higher percentage of English speakers than America (USA). So yeah, just stay with English, Dutch is useless unless u wanna go to Afrika.
Ha ha dankjewel dat je ons een spiegel voorhoudt. Ik moest erg lachen om jouw opmerkingen! (Thank you so much for holding up a mirror so we can see for ourselves how annoying we are!)
As a French person, based on what you said, I find us extremely similar to the Dutch! Except maybe for the part about automatically switching to English (it really depends on the person and the city). But even the doe normaal concept is prevalent in France!
If I as a Durchie visit France, 80% of the people, you may say, refused to speak English. Especially when you asked in French if they speak English. The answer I mostly get is: “Why? You speak French already.” 😂. Beautiful country though. 🇫🇷🇳🇱 (Did you notice that actually the French did a 90° clockwise rotation of their flag, because ours was already taken, by …. us. 😅
i feel like french people are less welcoming then Dutch people. they (dutch people) can be pretty direct, maybe a bit rude, but they are usually willing to help. or at least treat you like an equal.
@@marlonmarquez4798 French people are definitely not rude and put a lot of emphasis on being treated as equals. I have a feeling you're talking about Paris, which is a busy capital city. Outside of the Parisian region most people are more relaxed and therefore "nicer". I live in Paris and my parents live in small cities in another region, and you can definitely tell the difference when going from one region to another. I've also lived in another country and it's the same story (the whole capital city vs the rest of the country dichotomy).
Ik vind het zelf ook heel irritant dat ik in Amsterdam in het Engels aangesproken word. Ik voel me dan net een toerist. Ik begrijp de kritiek dat als een buitenlander mij dan aanspreekt in het Nl mijn eerste reactie inderdaad is om een taal te zoeken die we gemeen hebben, meestal Engels. Dit heeft er niet zozeer mee te maken dat ik geen Nl wil spreken, maar op zo'n moment is de prioriteit dat je zo'n persoon helpt. Met een buitenlandse vriend daarentegen spreek ik het liefst Nl, omdat dan mijn prioriteit is dat ik een diepere connectie met zo'n persoon maak, en dat lukt mij het beste in mijn moedertaal.
Where is that unsubscribe button? 😝😉 Nice video Sam. You can tell us the truth. Most Dutchies can handle it. Ignore the crowd with torches and pitchforks at your door. You are still one of the most positive people on the planet. ❤❤❤
Wat een leuk filmpje, heel herkenbaar! Wat grappig ook dat veel mensen in het engels reageren hieronder. Klagen en doe maar normaal zijn 2 interessante dingen, de generatie van mijn opa en oma had als instelling: niet lullen maar poetsen (hard werken en niet klagen). Er was amper ruimte voor plezier, je moest vooral nuttig zijn. Heeft dit te maken met ons handelsverleden? Met het feit dat we het kapitalisme hebben uitgevonden (het komt van de voc om investeringen in schepen minder risicovol te maken)? Of door het calvinistische geloof? Het lijkt iig haaks op het klagen te staan. Ik zie klagen vooral als iets makkelijks, je kunt zo je frustratie over je leven afreageren op iets buiten jezelf. Ik verwacht dat de komende generaties voor verandering gaan zorgen, door de mentale problemen die steeds meer mensen hebben gaat er hopelijk meer ruimte komen voor ontspanning en zelfontplooiing, minder focus op presteren. Dan is het misschien niet meer nodig om zoveel te klagen en hoeven we ook niet meer per se normaal te doen. Ik heb een droom ;)
Alle punten nee eens? Lul niet zo stom man. Wij wassen onze klauwen niet? Geen kritiek op nederland? In een restaurant niet dingen kunnen wijzigingen? Blabla
@@Franco_Bagarella eh.. ja in een kroeg zie je regelmatig dat mannen plassen en weer doorgaan. In een ‘echt’ restaurant kun je wel iets bestellen met een of twee aanpassingen (stuk lastiger bij eetcafe’s, buurtcentra e.d.), maar ook restaurants vragen vaak om speciale dieetwensen bij de reservering al aan te geven. En als je tijdens de dinerdrukte met een hele waslijst aan aanpassingen komt, en daarmee een gerecht compleet kapotmaakt, worden ze echt niet blij van je. En dat we niet goed met kritiek om kunnen gaan,bewijs je nu zelf…
Haha, I think I agree with all of your points! Only in restaurants, I don't encounter so much the 'not possible' attitude, often the restaurants I visit are quite flexible. But great video!
As a Dutchy: 1. Yes, correct backpacks on chairs sucks indeed 2. Correct too 3. This is true, we never speak back in Dutch 4. Disagreeing on this one, for the simple fact that a big part of the Netherlands is now an expat or a local with a different ethnic background and they complain and complain about us for decades already and it's really tiring. If we are welcoming and receiving "we are too happy" if we stick to our cultural habits "we are too grumpy" it's never good enough. 5. I always wash my hands and always hear, mostly from women, "oh, you DO wash your hands." so going to agree with this one. 6. We love to be structured, no one should feel special enough thinking they can break this structure - you are like the rest of us (that's the mindset). 7. We complain and never do anything about it, this is indeed dumb. And lastly, your video feels like genuine feedback and not like an insult - thanks a lot for that, this is really appreciated.
Yeah good thing about point 6! I think for many Dutch people, asking for a special treatment (making a customization) is considered pretentious or conceited.
Number 1 is what I do on purpose. I don't want anyone to have a seat next to me, they have to ask first. I do so too if I wanna sit somewhere. I'm a person who is about ''people must ask for permission for anything if they come near me'', because I don't trust people one bit
I'm a brit living in NL for nearly 10 years and agree with everything, so you got a laugh from me. The only thing I'd say is, for number 7 I am way worse than the Dutch! Some things I'd add would be: * How difficult it is to be spontaneous with Netherlanders as they always seem to have something on their agenda when you *feel* like doing something * On a similar topic, it can be hard to just go out to grab some food last minute because, again, the restaurants have every table reserved for the next month, even if the place is super basic.
The first point is so true! But even for me as a Dutch person, it is sometimes hard. Whenever I can, I try to be spontaneous and allow people to come to my place last-minute, knowing it is uncommon in our culture.
1. The backpack one is so frustrating and a lot of people think it is, yet everyone does it. 2. The 'doe normaal' mindset is more about not bragging about your wealth or accomplishments, we like to think everyone is the same and you can also see that in the hierarchy at work. 3. You are completely right about that one, I always do it and I have foreign friends that struggle to learn Dutch because of this. 4. I agree on this one again, but I think it also depends on the subject. 5. Personally, I always wash my hands. But I agree a lot of people do it and it's kind of gross haha. 6. I think you are right, but I'm Dutch and I love my structure :D 7. Yep, we do complain a lot haha.
Thanks for the feedback! And for the "doe normaal", I knew some people may not agree with the example, but what I felt Tygo was showing from his response was not wanting exagerrate the potential of or expect too much from the video promotion. And I feel that that ties with putting limits on oneself and not wanting to stand out too much from others. But that's just how I saw it! *and this isn't a diss to Tygo* haha. I believe that this article here explains it well: fitbeauty.nl/waarom-de-doe-maar-normaal-mentaliteit-frustreert/ it's point number 4 under "Deze uitspraak weerhoudt.."
Agree on the backpack on the side thing. But when I ask if I can use the seat, I mostly get a smile. Or even a “sorry”. It’s also a habit because of the train floors being so untidy and downright dirty.
Some valid points. One i'm finding to be mistaken a lot is " de doe normaal ". For me it just means don't overdo, you have my respect anyway. For me it doesn't make a difference if you work for sanitation or be a high up man in business. ❤😊
As for 'this isn't possible': people who work in government and/or are not connected to their place of work, will all too easily say your problem does not fit their system and therefore is not their problem. However, there are loads of compassionate people around here who do think along with you. I phoned with some of them within the bureaucracies of the local government, my phone company's customer service, and the national tax office. I always try to provide nice custom solutions for people in my own work. If you think it's bad here, try Germany or Norway. I think on the whole, we've found a nice balance as a society.
In Belgium I once stopped at a station in the early evening, feeling a little peckish. The local sandwich shop was only open during lunch hours, so I went to the snack bar, which was run by a Chinese family, and asked for a 'broodje kroket' (admittedly not a staple in Belgium) and the person helping me answered, we don't have that. So I'm looking at the snacks on display and I'm thinking, there are the kroketten, there are the buns, where is the problem? I think it's in accounting.
This video is so well thought out! The consistent centered composition, the little zooms, the seamless transitions, the amazing intro. It was splendid to watch! And yeah, I have just realized I spoke in English 😂. Over het tassen op de stoel leggen: het is vaak inderdaad een manier om te zorgen dat je alleen zit, maar soms is het ook gewoon prettig om je tas dichtbij je te hebben of niet op de vieze vloer te leggen. Het is een soort luxe!
Inderdaad, als het niet druk is zet ik ook m'n tas naast me. Dan wordt ie niet vies, kan ik 'm in de gaten houden en hoef ik 'm niet op schoot te hebben 😅 Zit wel zo lekker. Maar is idd een luxe ja 🤗
Haha ja, als ik zei in de video, ik snap het als de trein niet vol is, maar vaak is het zo dat ook als de trein vol is, mensen zetten nog hun tas op de stoel.
Ik zit in de trein zelden in een coupé, en bijna altijd op een stoeltje bij de in- / uitgang. Ik kan mijn tas dus alleen kwijt op de stoel naast me, of de grond. ALS ik in een coupé zit, doe ik mijn tas ook niet in de opbergruimte. Ik lees / puzzel altijd in de trein. Als ik iedere keer moet opstaan om mijn tas te pakken omdat ik stop met lezen, en wil gaan puzzelen, of omgekeerd, word ik gek, en de mensen die naast me zitten ook. On a side note : Als je niet wilt dat mensen naast je gaan zitten, laat je tas dan thuis, en stop gewoon met douchen. ;-)
My nationality is Dutch, although I'm nowhere near like a Dutchy . The " No, that is not possible ", especially with scrambled eggs instead of fried one😤😤😤 makes me hella mad. People expect things to happen like spoiled brats 😂😂 What I learned by myself was that culture is infinitely facetted and has beauty , if you are willing to listen 😮 Difference does not mean good nor evil, it means other values are applied because of living environment.
As someone with autism living inside the Netherlands, I have definitely suffered from the "doe normaal" mindset. When I told people I had autism, they began to talk to me as if I was someone that is slow and dumb. Or they would all of a sudden treat me completely different after learning of that fact. It definitely made me weary of telling people of my autism. Only people on the internet, my friends and my family know that I have autism.
Honestly the people that act that way either don't know how to act around you, as they have never dealt with autism and only know it through who knows Kees. "Waterstofbommen op mofrika gooien". if you get what I mean. Or they are just massive assholes.
You don't get "Doe normaal". The Dutch are just sober, we usually don't like the fake, overexaggerating, "American" fakeness. While they are sober, they achieved great things. It's one the best countries on the planet. Especially Brabant. The weather can be a bit better.
Just want to let you know that the word you're looking for here is not "sober", but "down to earth". Sober is mostly used when talking about alcohol use. Especially since you mentioned Brabant, since sober isn't the best way to describe us beer loving Brabo's ;)
@@CatBloom42 Sober CAN be used to describe the nature of people that way; it is an actual definition in the English language, too. It's not just as common as it is in Dutch. :)
Nah we kunnen echt wel raarder zijn, zeker in brabant. Is toch niet goed dat je een nieuwe haarstijl probeert en binnen een uur heeft ons mam en het hele dorp het er over
I think a lot of immigrants have trouble understanding "doe normaal". It does not mean "act normal". 90% of the time it just means "don't be rude/antisocial/a jerk". The phrase "niet normaal" means "extraordinary" and can be used in a positive and negative sense.
As a Dutch person going by train to and from work in rush hours it's not that annoying to have to deal with people placing their bags next to them. just ask if you can sit there and they'll move it 99.9% of the time. what IS annoying however is that people will always, and i mean ALWAYS, stay in fron of the train doors in a group making it impossible for people to get out and while you're just trying to exit they will all try to enter at the same time...
Moest laatst de trein nemen in Leiden, ik zat al 20 minuten te watchten in de kou door vertragingen, de trein komt aan (het is spitsuur dus perron is propvol) en het was maar één treinstel di al vanuit schiphol is gekomen, BESEF hoe druk het was Ik liep elk deur langs en er leek geen plek te zijn, mensen stonden letterlijk gelijk met het deur, maar als je door de ramen keek zag je de coupes nog leeg! Snapte niet waarom mensen gewoon niet door lopen
I was also born and raised in the Netherlands and i remember when i used to take everything so super duper serious, i realized life really wasn't all that fun about taking everything so directly until i changed, now instead of getting mad or angry at one little thing, i often just find an appropriate comment to say and just continue the conversation and be happy i'm talking to said person as they're comfortable to make such remarks if they're in a good will of course. Everyone can be themselves so i'm just happy to have realized that early on in life and not too late to become a grumpy old man. Still wonder where the mentality comes from.. Parents? Schools? I mean we're told to say no to strangers but i think it's dialed up to 11 here
Pretty fair critisism overall to be fair. I recognize pretty much all of those things from myself or someone in my direct environment :') #3 is a bit more nuanced though. I don't think most Dutch people mind English becoming bigger in our country at all, the option of English that is. But when bussinesses set up shop in the Netherlands, and especially in big cities this is becoming a problem, do not speak Dutch at all, that does become a bit of a problem. I know two people, my aunt and my sister's husband, who simply aren't super good at learning. They do not speak English so if they walk into a store in their own country and nobody there can even speak the language, that is quite a hinderance. Imagine more and more stores in America that don't even speak English but only Spanish. I bet a lot of Americans would feel the same way about that and I would agree that's equally weird. Sure if you can speak Spanish provide that service to everyone that can benefit from that but at least have a basic understanding of English since that is the primary language of the country you're in. It is kind of weird to need an interpreter to be able to buy something from a store in your own country no matter how many people do speak or even prefer to speak English. Nothing wrong with businesses that can speak both English and Dutch though, it's just the English-only businesses that are quite a problem for some people that literally were born and raised here.
Nice and positive video thanks! As a dutchmen (have to complain a little😂) i agree with small things like we switch fast to english when we hear a foreign accent. But we are what we are : opportunistic,direct,structural and if you get to know us pretty friendly (apart from dinertime😜). Really Nice that you take the effort to make this video and to have a open mind in it. Take care !
Haha ik doe dit gewoon in het Nederlands voor je om alvast 1 van je klachten te verhelpen. En daar had je helemaal gelijk in trouwens. Het idee van doe normaal vind ik niet helemaal passen bij je punt of theorie. Groots denken zit nog erg in het bloed hier maar het is wel afgezwakt sinds oude tijden. Het idee van doe normaal is meer dat je niet te buitengewoon gedrag of manier van denken moet toepassen maar praktisch moet blijven. Zo krijgen we namelijk al decennia dingen/zaken gedaan. In het geval van tygo zou ik zeggen neem een risico dat mag best. Het geval van “it’s not possible” heb ik ook moeite mee. Zeker bij een servicecenter die je belt moeten ze juist meedenken en zoeken naar oplossing die “wel possible” is. Dat is de hele functie van een service center… en in het restaurant zou ik gelijk zijn opgestaan den weggelopen. Als dat al niet meer kan dan zijn ze je geld niet waard. Roerei, spiegelei weet ik wat allemaal je vraagt geen hogere wiskunde gewoon een andere optie. Die zaak wilt gewoon geen geld verdienen. En als laatste, klagen ja dat kunnen we goed met zijn allen. Maar als alle mensen die hier geboren en getogen zijn nou eens goed gaan kijken naar ver over de grens dan zien ze dat het hier helemaal niet zo slecht is. Tuurlijk zijn er uitdagingen en “crises” maar je zal maar geboren zijn op Haïti of in Syrië of Afghanistan. Dan zit je met tranen in je ogen te kijken naar hoe wij met zijn alleen kunnen klagen over de domste zaken binnen onze grenzen. ✌🏻
Great video as always, I think we complain to pursue change. Just like you are doing currently with this video, you might me more dutch then you would like to admit ;)
Nice content! #2 on the list with the 'not possible' mindset, Dutch people contradict themselves a bit here. I've worked in many (asian) restaurants and it's only the Dutch customers who wants to alter things on the menu. Like your example with the fried eggs, they often want things to be added, changed into something else or removing it, which in most cases, the restaurant will comply with it. But if it's a Dutch (western) restaurant, they will not comply with your request with 'it's not possible'. Think this one goes a bit hand in hand with the complaining and if the complaint is redirected to them, they have a hard time accepting it.
This was hilarious, Sam!!!! Loving your videos and that you are always respectful of the people of The Netherlands even when pointing out the things you’re learning about the country as an expat. At the end of the day it’s still one of the coolest countries in the world! 😂❤
Not going to lie, I went into this video with a bit of hesitation. I figured u might share something that is just a different perspective ('rude' vs 'direct' culture as a general concept). But damn, everything youve said I agree with a lot. Very very well said. Its great that youre an American that came here, and that you share these perspectives. Some of these things I wouldnt have consciouly thought of. To be fair though, the reaction on this video seems to be positive, so maybe 4 is a bit more nuanced :P All jokes aside. I think its a case of "I can talk shit about my mom/family but if you do it ill get mad and defensive". A lot of Dutch people will talk negatively ('complain') about their own country. But when a foreigner gives criticism, we get defensive. I think its part nationalism and part human psychology that its hard to receive criticism. When you criticize your own country, you criticize 'something else', but when an outsider critizes your country: you are part of it so it feels personal. Few countries or people handle criticism well. I think the same would count for America definitely, but also Denmark, France, Great-Britian and other european nations. Its an unfortunate part of our psyche.
Foreigners don't do this: 1. It's far too busy in the trains, and everywhere else, because far too many people came to live here. 2. Doe normaal is about anti-social behaviour, people thinking they are so special the rules don't apply to them. The habit of not bragging or being overly optimistic should not be confused with that. 3. It's simply rude to not make any effort to speak Dutch when you work in a bar or restaurant. It's also rude to start learning Dutch after two years after you found out there is a difference between proficiency and native language and than believe you can use any random person's time to practice while you haven't put in any real effort yet. The level of Dutch in the video won't provoke a reaction in English. 4. Most immigrants critique on the Netherlands comes from myths that go around in their expat bubbles where no one speaks Dutch. I't ill informed usually, and not fully thought through. There is usually a reason behind things they simply didn't think of. 5. If you know better than the cook, cook yourself. They offer you a dish, not personal servants to tell what to prepare how. It's a stupid American habit that only exists because of underpaying staff so they are dependent on tips, it's rude to the waitress and the cook, everywhere outside the USA, and it's even ruder to bring it from the USA, ditch it. 6. Yes we complain. There is not the tiniest bit of relevance to what other countries do worse, why should that be the measure of things?
I was at Hoofddorp station right and there is this doner stand i used to come there often so i know the guy who stands there after 5. He is an Iranian and always when foreigners come he speaks dutch to them on purpose. Thats a very nice thing to see. The food is awesome aswell
The not washing your hands thing makes me go crazy whenever I see it. It’s absolutely disgusting and you have to share things with others. I personally don’t care if someone is annoyed when I tell them to move their bag. You’re moving it and I’m sitting down. I won :) The structure thing also annoys me. I love living my life in the moment and I always take the most odd route possible. So when people “stick” to their schedule and plans and always have this structured lifestyle it makes them seem really boring in my eyes. And if you ever want to see them or interact with them, you have to basically schedule with them like an appointment. And the complaining thing wouldn’t be as bad, if they at least backed it up with real protests. They say so much, but never actually do anything or fight for their rights. It annoys me when we as a majority want change, yet I’m one of the few that actually stand up to do something about it
@@sannegodijn301 You mean the farmers that are being a nuisance to the population? that's harassment not protesting. they were hurting/annoying normal citizens and hoping the government would do something about it. That's not a good protest. Besides that I haven't seen any protest of value
@@3elawi i gues you havent been paying attention also protests are supposed be disruptive we also had alot of bus driver protests for better pay and working conditiones how is that not valuable there have been alot of pretests against the royal family and just because you dont think they are valuable doesnt mean they arent
As a Scot living in the Netherlands for the last 13 years, yes to all of this lol ... drives me crazy sometimes 😂 Another thing, or two I would add to this list is lack of common social manners, especially in shops, nobody moves for anybody, its so rude, and that people dont look when they are crossing the road, or leaving a shop, they just come barreling right out, whether it be cars, bikes or pedestrians... I almost had 3 incidents on the 20 minute bike ride to my daughters school... one kid didnt bother to check his right while crossing the street so i gad to slow down quickly, then a man on his bike thought everyone around him was psychic, and then a woman stepped right out onto the bike path and didnt step back to let me pass, or the 4000 students behind me, got a dirty look too ...like, oh come on, how am i in the wrong here?!!! .... and dont get me started on cars who just come out of their driveways or pass parked cars on my side, i stop to let them pass, never a thanks is offered lol
omg the social manners one. i'm dutch myself (born n raised) but i totally agree on it i have had moments where i had panic attacks in the trams and metros because nobody would look around to see if anyone had to get off. so instead i plowed trough while being in a state of pure panic knocking people over and treading on toes. like if i'm in there i always look around to see if anyone needs to get off in wich case i will move my way to the side where possible or angle myself differently so they can schooch by (though in some cases i've also had very out of pocket experiences in the same manner of things where i was perfectly on the side but a woman had to take the side i was standing on to exit the metro. the other side near the door was completely empty and would have easily fit her and her oversized crotch goblin carrier, but no she had to wheel it straight over my feet safe to say if the doors hadn't closed and the train hadn't left that probably would have resulted in a fight and a woman in jail for attacking a minor since i was like 13 at the time) another good example was in a store when i needed some new underwear, there were two people blocking the path to the undergarments because the lady and her elderly mother (who had a walker) had positioned themselves in such a manner that they could reach the shirts in the other crate but nobody could actually reach the underwear in the other one. i legit felt like a video game character with a routing issue where i walked back and forth becase i just wanted to get to the underwear.. so my social anxiety (and me being a trans man so i didn't want them to question why i was going for the men's boxers) just caused me to error out completely and have a slight panic attack because if there is one thing i do not know what to do is figure out how to get there or wait till they are gone.. and they were taking their sweet old time.
I like the waving of both flags, kudos to you! I appreciate your honesty, as always. I can see that the bag on the seat would be a thing in any big city. It certainly is here in New York. But I do understand, there's a lot going on in the world and people don't have the capacity for other people's space, much less conversation. It's a bit of a sad state of affairs, but who knows? Someone who changes your life could be the very person sitting right next to you. All I know is, I don't care how reluctant you are to move that bag, you're gonna give me my seat that I paid for when I got on this ride! 😆 And I can see how "being normal" is a stabilizing concept. "Don't cause trouble", but many forms of "out of the norm" bring big growth to a society. Up-and-coming artists that put places on the map are usually not "normal". So, I am all about "doe niet normal"! I will say this, though, "No, it's not possible": I totally understand that! Even as a New Yorker and a believer in "anything is possible", I don't like to ask for unnecessary customization. It's okay to ask, sure. But I also think, as Americans, we expect people to cater to us (consciously or ignorantly so) in a way the rest of the world doesnt. Perhaps I'm wrong, but I feel like what it says on the menu is what it is. "We don't variate. No, we don't serve vegetarian options at our steakhouse! " 🤭I'm just saying... And the washing of the hands thing, I don't know, you guys need to work that out, 😂. You'd be surprised, that's not a Dutch thing. 😉🤫
Honestly. "Doe normaal" is only the first two words of the original statement "Doe Normaal, dan doe je al gek genoeg" which just means be yourself. for me.
Great video, and I too, as a Dutchie can attest that this is all too accurate. More dutchies should see this, because your approach is very honest, yet gentle. Would do lots of us good to see this video!
dutch people are very good and straight forward , i did lived in the nederlands 10 years, it took me 3 years to speak , i was living in eindhoven for 7 years at the start
As an American who has lived in the UK the past 25 years and has spent a lot of time in the Netherlands... the British do all these things/think this way, too. I'm going to throw some Dutch directness at you and say, I think it's very possible that these things stand out to you as Dutch *and strange* because you haven't travelled widely enough yet to notice it's ingrained elsewhere. It's not just the Dutch! In fact, I'm beginning to think it's Americans who are weird. 😉
I've been to quite a few places, but I've only lived in a handful. So indeed it's hard for me to draw a connection with the culture in the Netherlands to other places because I haven't experienced them on such a level. But I could imagine that a lot of this isn't exclusive to the Netherlands😃
@@exploringtheforeignSam, the Brits complain a lot about the weather too, the weather patterns are very similar, i am dutch, but live in Australia, i had to get used to some strange things they do here, and yes, they also complain...😅
I think you're spot on with the "doe maar normaal" interpretation. Dutch don't like to see people standing out or bragging, themselves included. But it has two sides and it cabn be annoying or even limiting. Maybe some people wash their hands before they touch there "squire" 😁
I’m traveling in the Netherlands right now. I thought you would say there are almost not toilet and all non-free. I live in Japan, I’m so much used to go to 7-eleven or a supermarket just for that (even free, all have bidet washlet and warm seat in winter). Good surprise was: even small cities or villages are lively. Just an exemple: Dalen, 4 bars/restaurants, Chinese restaurant, good size supermarket, bakery and dozen of other shops. Dalen barely register on the map how small it is.
as a dutchie, i agree with the list.. although i do some of them myself. I already speak more english than dutch due to my work and hobby.. And after only a pee, i don't always wash my hands... I learned not to pee on my hands.. but when i feel any splashback, then for sure i wash my hands.
I'm Dutch and I think all your points are valid. I think complaining comes natural to us because of the wheater 😄 Speaking English in shops annoyed me at first, but as I voted for more Europe I changed my mind😋 Love your enthousiasm in your videos!
What has voting for more Europe has to do with speaking English, especially since Brexit? If you are that European minded you ought to speak more German instead, though I'm not that much a fan of the last time more German was spoken in the Netherlands.
@@BlacksmithTWD Ja it has been almost 80 years now. Can we please continue our lives without constantly directly and indirectly referring to WW2..? Thank you! And yes German as a lingua franca is not such a bad idea. After all around 130 million people speak German as their mother language or as a second language. German is the most widely spoken mother language in the European Union and an official language in seven countries. In 42 countries there are more than 7.5 million people who belong to a German-speaking minority. How many people have learned German as a foreign language? 289 million people. According to calculations by Ulrich Ammon, an expert on German language, this is how many people around the globe have learned German at some time in their lives. How well they speak it is another matter entirely. At the moment, 15.4 million people around the world are currently learning German as a foreign language: 90 percent of them are school students and 10 per cent are adults.
As for the shops I'd say that it is important that people who live here learn Dutch, because it's an important part of integrating into Dutch culture. But as mentioned in the video Dutch people will often switch to English. The solution should however be that we stop switching to English so much, instead of stopping to expect immigrants to learn the language. What seems most sensible to me is to keep English as the lingua franca, and besides that language you just speak at least your native language and the language of the country you're living in. If I were to move to France I'd also be expected to learn French, and rightfully so. And that's nothing to do with being pro-Europe or not, I'm very much in favour of more EU, but that doesn't mean we should just stop learning the language of the places where we live.
@@dutchyjhome Seeing how many people are arguing to ignore the neurenberg code now I rather think we should mention and refer to WW2 more often. Though I ought to add that contrary to your assumption I don't constantly directly and indirectly refer to WW2. That aside, I'm glad you at least understood the other part of my statement and provided the substantiation for it.
Mijn expat-buren antwoorden me in het engels als ik ze in het Nederlands aanspreek. Een van hen spreekt verstaanbaar Nederlands, maar doet het liever niet. En in de horeca zou je mogen verwachten dat de mensen in de bediening wat basiswoordjes kennen, maar helaas. In de trein je tas op de stoel naast je laten staan is gewoon onbeschoft, en niet typisch Nederlands.
If you ask me to, I'll speak Dutch instead of English. So, here we go: 1. Klagen is heerlijk en helpt dingen verbeteren. Het zou wel beter zijn als we ook vaker dankbaarheid uitspraken. 2. Van dat 'Dat is onmogelijk' wil ik ook af. (Laatst was ik in de bus en iemand wilde met de bus, maar had alleen contant geld. De buschauffeur had met zijn eigen bankpas een kaartje voor haar kunnen kopen en dan het geld kunnen aannemen, maar dat deed hij niet. Natuurlijk voorkomt zulke striktheid corruptie en fraude: Als de buschauffeur bijvoorbeeld zomaar het contante geld had aangenomen en haar had laten instappen, had hij waarschijnlijk al het geld zelf gehouden in plaats van dat het ook werd geregistreerd en gedeeltelijk naar het bedrijf ging. Toch gaan we hierin te ver.) 3. Veel mannen vegen niet af na het plassen en wassen daarom hun handen dan ook niet, maar als vrouw vind ik dat ook een vies idee. 4. Ja, het is jammer. Nederlanders vinden het makkelijker om te klagen dan gewoon dankbaar te zijn voor hun land, dus moeten ze andere landen neerhalen om hun trots te laten zien. 5. Als je zegt in het Nederlands te willen praten, doen we dat, maar als je dat niet zegt, kun je overkomen alsof je vreest dat ik geen Engels kan, maar veel liever Engels praat. 6. De 'doe normaal'-mindset vind ik wel lekker makkelijk, maar als iemand wat meer afwijkt, vind ik niet dat mensen dat mogen veroordelen. 7. Rugtassen op stoelen moeten inderdaad niet kunnen in een drukke trein.
I will answer in english because i cannot yet answer in Dutch and since i am on phone its bothersome to type and use translator for some words on same device. The problem with the idea of "if you ask to speak dutch then we will" is that it works only for actual conversations with but most interactions alwith strangers are short. Like if i buy a coffee, 90% of time just seller speaks in english to me despite i asked in dutch. You wouldnt ask them to speak dutch because the conversation is about to end. Those interactions are short but help a lot with breakong language barrier because you wont suddenly speak good dutch, you need some very simple practice first. Generally its good if dutch talked in dutch with foregners who talk dutch to them (even if its absolutely awful). My mom doesnt speak english and learn dutch but they just simply try to speak english with her. For example in hospital when they see she doesnt speak english and her dutch is still very bad, they simply ignore her (in a sense that they dont engage in questioning her in any way even though she can answe some things like name, date of birth etc (and that is what they needed)). Anyway. Dutch first, english later is a good approach. P.s. if you have desire to answer: what is the fundamental difference between eens, maar and even when talking imperative? Internet has very loose explanation of these and generalise it. So i would like to know how to determine what each of them brings to the sentence
Ga eens naar buiten! 'Eens' implies that it wants the listener to follow immediately, although it won't deal any consequences for ignoring it . 'Ga eens naar buiten! Het is tijd!' = 'Ga naar buiten. En wel nu, alsjeblieft? Het is tijd!' Ga maar naar buiten. 'Maar' turns the imperative into a helpful suggestion. 'Wil je even uitwaaien? Dat is goed. Ga maar naar buiten.' = 'Wil je even uitwaaien? Dat is goed. Ga naar buiten, als je dat fijn vindt.' It may be used in a more sarcastic manner. 'Laat maar zitten.' = 'Het zou beter zijn voor iedereen als we dit onderwerp laten zitten.' The (emotional) context explains the reason. Ga even naar buiten. 'Even' means that following the imperative shouldn't take too much time (and effort). Therefore, the imperative is not too much to ask from the other. Therefore, the other is expected to follow it willingly without long consideration. 'Die ruzie van net? Volgens mij zit je daarmee nog steeds in je vel. Ga even naar buiten: even afkoelen.' = 'Die ruzie van net? Volgens mij zit je daarmee nog steeds in je vel. Ga naar buiten. Dat kost niet zoveel moeite. Dan kun je afkoelen. Dat kost niet zoveel moeite.' 'Ga maar eens naar buiten.' = 'Ga nu direct naar buiten - als je wil.' 'Ga eens even naar buiten.' = 'Ga naar buiten. Doe het snel. Zoveel moeite kost dat niet.' 'Ga maar even naar buiten.' = 'Ga naar buiten als je wil. Zoveel moeite kost dat niet.' 'Ga maar eens even naar buiten.' = 'Ga nu direct naar buiten als je wil. Zoveel moeite kost dat niet.'
I notice that a lot of Dutch people are really arguing with you on the "doe normaal" mindset. They really badly want to soften it. But I am affraid that you are quite right. As a society, we try to preserve our sense of self-worthy by making sure nobody else is noticably better than us. Just a personal example: Our high-schools are split in different education levels and I was in the highest one. My teachers and my parents were very pre-occupied with telling me that this did not make me better than anyone. I could really not be publically proud of what made me special, even though as a shrill four-eyed kid it really was all I had going for me. Even now I feel awkward for typing this. It is such a faux-pas. I think Dutch society could be nicer still if we allowed other people their pride, even if it shows inadequacies in ourselves.
The reason why Do Normaal mindset is so important for is is because of our history, without that mindset our country would have been torn apart. You can totally have pride in what you do, just don't become too full of yourself and announce everywhere how great you are
@@teaser6089 With all due respect, my personal experience appearantly wildly differs from yours. I am happy for you for that but it does not invalidate my story in the slightest.
Customizing food in a restaraunt is a weird and mostly American thing that is actually annoying. In Japan asking to replace or remove ingredients is even considered offensive in some cases. And I like that. Just eat what the chef has created. Unless you have some dietary restrictions of course but even in that case you probably should order a different dish then. I have never in my life asked to customize an order unless it was an explicit thing you can do on the menu.
Alright, I'm prepared to receive some mix reactions on this one haha. Also, yes I would have planning on this, but I've discussed that topic quite a bit in other videos, so I left it off.
For the non-Dutch viewers, I noticed that I missed adding a translation at 1:10 in the video. But there I say "you need to be more optimistic" and "that's such a Dutch response"
You were more than fair, though at point 2 you reminded me a little of jan peter balkenende hahahaha! As a Dutchie myself I can speak to point 4 as well. Dutch people love to critique Americans but often overlook the fact that they aren't the judges of rationality they consider themselves to be. A little more kindness and less judgment towards everyone would serve us all. Much love!!
Thank you!! And slowly but surely I'll branch out to other places as well. But with me living in the Netherlands, most of my experiences/insights are here at the moment😃
As a Dutchman I couldn't agree with you more. Most of us have a toxic mentality which makes them think they're perfect and bette than any country. Well, we're not perfect at all. They're many things I can name that other countries do better at than the Netherlands. And I also hate this "doe normaal" thing. It just puts so much pressure on me that I feel embarrassed to just be outside in even the slightest. I just wanna be myself. But apparently that's not allowed in this Boring society.
I think you misinterpreted Tygo's modesty for an "act normal" mindset, and customer service in the US is too much focused on pleasing the customer according to most Europeans (it's not just a Dutch thing), but other than that, I do agree with your points. Most of those annoy me too sometimes...
This was so accurate. I live in Belgium but 6 of 7 things were the same. Only diffrence is that sometimes they will adapt something if you ask. The rest 100% same here in Belgium 😅.
The switching to English is so extremely true, I have been a private Dutch speaker and this is a main annoyance for many of my students (to be fair, some should force themselves to speak more, but still it applies).
Over het algemeen klopt het wel. Zelfs het feit dat Nederlanders volhardend zijn om Engels te praten of te schrijven, zie vele reacties. 😜 Leuke video. 👍🏻
the first one, while i accept why you might find it a bit annoying, most people just really dont want to interact with people they dont know, they just wanna go to work/school and back home. its also most common that this backpack thing is done in the silent coupes of trains, where its already weird to sit next to someone, let alone someone you dont know.
I think most of your complaints are valid. To number 7 you can add people talking in the silence sections of the trains as well. The one I kinda half disagree with is that "act normal" isn't so much about not thinking big, but about not standing out too much. I think it has its upsides and downsides. It can mean that people aren't allowed to be themselves or different (bad), but it can also mean not annoying random strangers and making things about you all the time (good). Other than that, it's all accurate.
Oh yeah, it sucks. It's annoying, I always get extremely mad, when people talk while they are seated in a silence section. I mean, why TF do you think I wanna be seated there?
One thing that annoys me, being a Dutch person myself, is the inclination of many people to have an opinion about everything, even when such people are not 'hindered by any knowledge' as a literal translation of a Dutch expression goes, rather than being a bit more modest and simply admit 'I don't know enough about so I won't say anything about it'. For example when something in a foreign country happens, and everyone has a strong opinion about it, not taking into account that people from other cultures might see things very differently, or when judging what some specialist or politician _should_ have done, etc. Directness - not all Dutch are equally direct. It's mostly a 'randstad' (or Western Netherlands) thing, I think. I'm originally from a region in the Netherlands where more indirect speech is common, where you have to infer what is _not_ being said, and I had to actively get used to that 'directness' when I started to live in the Western part of the country 25 years ago. As for directness vs. rudeness - to me the dividing line is the question whether any practical purpose is served with it, and whether or not it could have been achieved differently. For example - suppose you're a manager and you have this person in your team that really thinks he is extraordinary and should be treated as such, whereas in reality he's underperforming and just obstructing the flow in the department. In that case, you may need to have a very unpleasant discussion with that individual, not sugarcoating anything, just in order to get it perfectly clear to him that he should really adapt, or else. That's directness, in my view. Needlessly offending or hurting anyone where it serves no practical goal isn't directness - that's rudeness. Doesn't matter if people _call_ it 'directness' and say 'Hey, I'm just saying what I think!'
I much prefer a down to earth Dutch 'doe normaal' attitude over the hysterical attitudes, exaggerated fake friendliness, self-entitlement and bragging culture that Americans typically display. As a Frisian, I find Hollanders to already be too hysterical for my liking. They could definitely do with turning it down a notch, rather than turning it up. Good point on the hand washing though. That is just disgusting.
'Doe normaal' is used when people are acting way out of pocket. Like screaming, or being a nuisance to other people. It literally means 'act normal', don't be an idiot
as a Dutch person, I will shed my light on these: 1. yes, sometimes we want to sit alone. But it's mostly uncomfortable to put your bag in front of you or on your lap and when no one's gonna sit next to you anyway, why not put it on the other seat? 2. Doe normaal is not associated with fear of standing out or failing or any fear at all. It's about not wanting to stand out for superficial reasons, desperately trying to gain attention. As you mentioned, many things were accomplished by Dutch people. Doe normaal means 1) don't go around showing off and 2) just behave in a public setting and show some respect. Ex-prime minister said: "Doe normaal of ga weg." Meaning: either adapt and behave, or leave. It's got two meanings, really, but I feel like neither come from a place of fear. it's also quite superficial i think? like, it's about behaviour. you can dream big, but don't show it. put that energy into realizing your dream rather than talking about it (personal interpretation alert) 3. this is a valid point. nothing to add. 4. I think we are pretty good at mocking ourselves. it's just when a non-Dutch person does so, we get so needlessly defensive (this comment of mine being a prime example of course :)) 5. girls mostly wash their hands 6. i have too little experience to say anything about this. we do have a highly customizable menu at McDonald's tho - edit: it might also be more cost& time efficient to not want to deviate from the default. we are a practical country 7. yes, we complain too much. although somehow, we are consistently one of the happiest countries in the world.
Thanks for your detailed response! To add more context to my point about "doe normal", I feel this article explains it well: fitbeauty.nl/waarom-de-doe-maar-normaal-mentaliteit-frustreert/ Specifically point number 4 under "deze afspraak weerhoudt"
The complaining even continues when the Dutch go abroad for vacation. I go to Austria every Summer vacation and I hear a lot about how panicked the Dutch are and how complaining they can be, yet Austrians prefer the Dutch over Germans. Germans literally ruin everything and are very disrespectful. This is what locals said to us themselves.
I think complaining is not only to make things stay as they are. It is also good tool to point out things you dont like and go wrong and get them addressed :p
I am on the floor with laughter...you've got it down in a humorous way. Obviously, these are very small things in this vid - and as with your others - is in the right spirit of appreciation and fun. Well done, guy.
As a Dutch guy living in the US I can say I feel the exact same about "American exceptionalism" Many people here see themselves as the hero in their own stories and will take any minor set-back as some kind of dishonor upon their family. (another fun American trope that marketing companies seem to have definitely figured out) Things are done so much more efficiently when people figure out that: No, you are not the hero. No, we need to do this together for it to work. No, you do make mistakes, and so do I. and Yes, we can overcome these things together.
Ik ga tegenwoordig niet eens meer zitten (maar reis ook eigenlijk niet langer me de trein dan het stukje Den Haag CS - R'dam CS); leun wel ergens tegen een trapleuning of muur aan.
Recently I went to a pub for a cup of coffee. The waitress didn´t speak Dutch so I tried English. Nope. German, nope. French, nope. All I got was a blank stare. Still don´t know what language it was that she did actually speak because she didn´t say a word. So I went next door and got a cup of coffee immediately when I asked in Dutch.
It breaks my heart to see the Dutch are facing genocidal displacement migration too. All indigenous European ancestral homelands seem to be being invaded and the indigenous peoples eradicated. I don't understand how everyone is okay with this. I love their cultures, their contributions to humanity are off the richter scale. We owe them enough to not genocide them.
Het is simpel, we hebben allen een mond die we kunnen opentrekken als we ergens zo graag willen zitten waar een tas staat. Ik zet mijn tas ook altijd naast me, ben soms moe en overprikkeld en dan extra behoefte aan dat niemand binnen mijn personal space gaat zitten. En daarbuiten, ik heb echt een grote backpack en zit ook veel in treinen die geen rek hebben boven mijn hoofd om 'm in te doen.
Not mad at all, cause its mostly true. About the 'doe maar normaal' culture: its imbedded in our culture. We dont mind if you make millions a year, as long as you act normal. Dont build a mansion when you are surrounded by small houses, dont Drive a 1m car when people around you have 'normal' cars. We share a very small place of earth with almost 18m people, and we all have to get along. So as long as you act 'normal' its all good. So its not that we dont want people to excell, we just dont like people bragging about it :)
As a Dutch person i do find it annoying and outright rude that if you start living here you refuse to take Dutch classes and learn the language and i HATE that the government does not do sh*t about it either (The Dutch government is overall useless and filled with pocket fillers anyway and hate their own kind) and yea Dutch people do love their complaining no matter what it is as we say ''Dat is echt typisch Hollands'' (That is really typically Dutch) and we also do love our structures yea but it is mainly because of our stone old education system where children are basically educated to become factory workers and become yes men and yes women (i think the factory worker education system is 60+ years old) and we also like to plan things days or even weeks beforehand so even if we do say ''i got nothing to do today'' does not always mean we'll hang with you.. not because we don't like you or anything but we just planned to do nothing today to have a day of me time and we also tend to be very direct and say what's on our minds and we also don't do it to be mean we just don't put layers upon layers of sugar coating on what we say no means no yes means yes
Nice one! I watched another vid just now, the one on what not to take for granted..and something occured to me.. The "doe normaal" and "its impossible" limiting mindsets might be an unwanted sideeffect of the "not keeping up with the Jones" thing. I love the " work to live dont live to work" lifestyle and for there to be no need to "be better than.." its a comfortable place to be... but it might make us a little too comfortable at times. Where it gets weird if you dare to want more. And it might even make some people unwilling to do anything more than the bare minimum required. Which would explain the " its impossible" mindset. It can be limiting and annoying to be around haha it good to have them pointed out like this! Kinda fun to consider these things.. thanks! Appreciate a healthy dose of constructive criticism like this vid it helps us stay openminded and connected.
Yeah the thing about not washing the hands is totally true and also apply to Dutch women. I am disgusted by it as I do wash my hands very often and thoroughly as a nurse.
As a Dutch person, another thing I'd add to the list is that Dutchies should stop confusing directness with rudeness. Too often I hear the excuse of 'I'm just saying what I think' to be rude and actually offend people. I do really appreciate directness in terms of expressing needs and expectations though, I find it helps to save time and bring clarity in work projects and to prevent conflict.
Oh man, this is a big one I missed haha. Would've been a great point for the video.
Its simple dude, you have to adapt to us.We don't adapt to your personal needs. Where do you think you are? Fantasy land?
as a Dutch person, maybe you should stop being a fucking snowflake
I agree. Big fan of directness and honesty here. But insulting ppl or acting entitled or even discriminating, and then saying you’re just being honest and direct, so not ok.
@a.e.gresel312 no, not true, we have plenty of negative things in the Netherlands, you are being a A..hole, how's that!!
He can still.point out those things, you are not direct, you are rude!!
Ah yes, you're complaining and thus, becoming a Dutchie! 🙂 Love your videos mate.
Haha, thanks!
I was about to say the same thing :) The better you are with complaining the more Dutch you are LOL
@@exploringtheforeign Doe noâhmaal man, wat un k*t video, je denk toch nie dattik me rugzak voâh iemand weghaal en de plek mot deile met wellich iemand die stink.En al die bùitelandâhs die hun ège taal spreike in de bùiteluch nie te doen gewaun. Zeggie nâh dat we nie teige kritiek kunnûh? Wat un onzin. En warom zâh ik me hande wasse na ut gebrùik van un aupebaah plei? Alles wattik daahna mot anrake is toch sowieso al vies. En nie zau zèke, as iets nie maugelijk dan is ut nie maugelijk, zau makkelijk is dat. En asje nie klaagt krèggie nauit wat je wil. Dus laat ons maah lekkâh klage en bemoei je mejje ège zakûh. E asje mèn baudschap nie met un korrel zâht neimp, hebbie gein humoâh.
@@exploringtheforeign
What did your father or grandfather do in WW2? We are curious. Was he a Red-ball expresse driver?
@@paulwee1924dusWtf? Doe normaal.
From a Dutchie: all true, but having lived abroad I find the most annoying trait is the inability to say sorry when you bloody well know you're in the wrong.
I don't know where that comes from. I don't know anyone who has any issues to say sorry. Just only when we are sorry. Not for bs reasons
Als Nederlander ben ik het een met alle punten’ vooral het klagen
Yes! I have lived abroad too, and saying sorry is just common decency and not a crime! Here it's simply unheard of and just creates so much negative feelings towards each other when a simple Sorry would just be enough🙏💯🫶
@@mirrrie Well, lady, your bs reasons might just be your own ego...and THAT is exactly the point.
@@mirrrie Je bevestigt wel lekker het punt waar het om gaat 😆
In restaurants and shops I don't mind the "not possible" rule so much. In America the customer is considered king, but in the Netherlands you're a guest. I like that mindset much more, because some people take the "customer is king" mentality to the extreme. Having the feeling you're a guest means your shopping/restaurant experience we'll be much more pleasant and humbling. Respect the people that serve you, that kind of mindset. And of course that respect needs to go both ways. Be generous and kind to your guests.
I prefer something in the middle. The "customer is king" mentality definitely leads to some rotten behaviour in the US, but the "not possible" (or as I prefer to see it, the "what the hell do you want") attitude from Dutch store clerks isn't great either. We've never had much of a service oriented culture here. But things are improving though; compared to 20 years ago most store clerks are way more friendly and helpful.
Imo there should be a middleground, as Kaasmeester said already. I think changes should be possible for people with allergies etc etc, but the customer shouldn't be allowed to just ask for so many changes that the food becomes a whole seperate dish :)
Would the presenter have been willing to pay extra for the additional workload caused by their request? If not, why should a business go out of their way without being able to charge a higher price. If you have a more “reasonable” request (no cheese please), they are generally accommodating even without you having allergies
My grandma had a shop for a while. She used to say"De klant is koning maar ik ben Keizer" and I absolutely love that statement. (The customer is king but I am Emperor)
that is wrong, the customer is king because the customer is paying YOU, the food isn't free you are not a guest you logic is flawed
As a german, I never knew, how similar dutchies and germans are at some points. Like complaining, rudeness/ directness or speaking english with foreigners who try to speak our language 😉.
When I watched 'Ted Lasso', I thought, the american film makers just confused the germans and the dutch. But now I see, maybe they have a point.
But for me, the dutchies are very nice people, much nicer then some germans 🤗 Allways love to visit your country ❣️❣️
Greetings from Berlin 😎
Haha what u say about ted lasso. I see also in a lot of american movies or shows that when they say they are dutch they speak german or otherwise
As a dutch person I really like the nickname Dutchie
Juwen7908 als ik Nederlands praat in Nederland krijg ik zelfs al commentaar van Duitsers dat ik tegen hen Duits moet praten in mijn eigen land. So what you said that the German people switch emedaily to English is not true
Most people which are NOT from The Netherlands or Germany mixed these 2 things up, it's annoying and funny at the same time😂😂😂
Most Germans are way more polite then most Dutch. But nothing beats a rude German in my opinion.
As a Dutch person, I mostly approve of this message. I get annoyed when I have to tell my order in English. Now it is true Dutch people will a lot of times answer you in English. However, there is a flip side. I have seen international students and expats put an arrogant tone of why don’t you just speak English towards me attitude. In Hospitality, it is a great opportunity how to learn to take an order in Dutch. I speak 6 languages and I always learned the languages in the countries I lived in out of respect as a guest in that country.
Yes I agree, it is not that I mind speaking English althoug we are in the Netherlands it is the tone and arrogant attitude that bothers me. As if it is strange for me to talk Dutch instead of English
My thoughts exactly. helping a tourist in English is fine (normal) but ordering a beer in English? No.
Yes can I have 1 war fries and a Mexican with mayonaise.
exactly! my country so i wanna speak in my language
@@joostvanderlee9569I refuse to speak back in English. My country indeed. Zijn ze godverdomme helemaal gek geworden!
Ja, zucht...., ik denk dat als je ergens lang genoeg woont, je niet alleen de voordelen zult leren kennen, maar ook de nadelen. In elk land is er de mix van goed en slecht. Nederland is geen paradijs, bij lange na niet. We proberen echter wel de voordelen in verhouding tot de nadelen te laten preveleren. Ik kan nog veel meer nadelen opnoemen omdat ik hier ben geboren en ik hier ben opgegroeid. De mentaliteit hier echter is wel zo dat als we bij elkaar gaan klagen, je medestanders zult vinden en door middel van collectiviteit kan trachten het probleem op te lossen. Klagen is aan de ene kant voor sommige mensen een manier van leven, maar aan de andere kant heeft het ook een sociale functie: Als je genoeg medestanders kunt vinden kun je er met elkaar iets aan doen.
Several years ago I was working for a bit in the Netherlands. I found I really enjoyed it so I started trying to learn Dutch on Duolingo. I tell the client I'm working with and he's like, "No, don't learn Dutch. It's useless. Nobody speaks Dutch." He was dutch.
I really picked up more Dutch from getting food at hole-in-the-wall Indonesian and Turkish places since they didn't speak any English.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
With a lot of us, we think it's cool that you want to learn our language. We really do appreciate it, but most us wouldn't like to teach you all that much, because "Why would you?"
Learning English, French, German or Spanish, we understand, because those are some of the biggest and most used languages in the world. So we struggle a lot when people are learning Dutch 😂
He's speaking the truth tho, we have a higher percentage of English speakers than America (USA). So yeah, just stay with English, Dutch is useless unless u wanna go to Afrika.
The last sentence was very funny
A lot of workplaces have international people, and since basically every Dutch person knows English, we simply speak in English at our Dutch jobs.
Ha ha dankjewel dat je ons een spiegel voorhoudt. Ik moest erg lachen om jouw opmerkingen! (Thank you so much for holding up a mirror so we can see for ourselves how annoying we are!)
You, we...erm, you...😂ARE BLOODY ANNOYING!!! But more so to each other than to visitors, I think.
You forgot to translate that you got a good laugh out of the remarks in this video.... 🙂
As a French person, based on what you said, I find us extremely similar to the Dutch! Except maybe for the part about automatically switching to English (it really depends on the person and the city). But even the doe normaal concept is prevalent in France!
If I as a Durchie visit France, 80% of the people, you may say, refused to speak English. Especially when you asked in French if they speak English. The answer I mostly get is: “Why? You speak French already.” 😂. Beautiful country though. 🇫🇷🇳🇱 (Did you notice that actually the French did a 90° clockwise rotation of their flag, because ours was already taken, by …. us. 😅
i feel like french people are less welcoming then Dutch people. they (dutch people) can be pretty direct, maybe a bit rude, but they are usually willing to help. or at least treat you like an equal.
@@marlonmarquez4798 French people are definitely not rude and put a lot of emphasis on being treated as equals. I have a feeling you're talking about Paris, which is a busy capital city. Outside of the Parisian region most people are more relaxed and therefore "nicer". I live in Paris and my parents live in small cities in another region, and you can definitely tell the difference when going from one region to another. I've also lived in another country and it's the same story (the whole capital city vs the rest of the country dichotomy).
Yall dont be switching to english cuz most of yall can't speak english😭😭
@@juulridicuul2539 I kind of doubt you've ever been to France, darling
The production quality on this video is through the roof!! I always enjoy your content so much! 😃
Really means a lot to read this!
Ik vind het zelf ook heel irritant dat ik in Amsterdam in het Engels aangesproken word. Ik voel me dan net een toerist. Ik begrijp de kritiek dat als een buitenlander mij dan aanspreekt in het Nl mijn eerste reactie inderdaad is om een taal te zoeken die we gemeen hebben, meestal Engels. Dit heeft er niet zozeer mee te maken dat ik geen Nl wil spreken, maar op zo'n moment is de prioriteit dat je zo'n persoon helpt. Met een buitenlandse vriend daarentegen spreek ik het liefst Nl, omdat dan mijn prioriteit is dat ik een diepere connectie met zo'n persoon maak, en dat lukt mij het beste in mijn moedertaal.
The last time I saw one of your videos, I was miserable and in the US. Now I’m seeing you again and I’m finally in the Netherlands :-)
Welcome!
Wow! How're you liking it?
@@dustylong bedankt 😊
@@exploringtheforeign still getting used to everything but I’m really happy to be here!
@@nuljeon I hope you learn to Cycle, it's the best mode of transport :D
Where is that unsubscribe button? 😝😉 Nice video Sam. You can tell us the truth. Most Dutchies can handle it. Ignore the crowd with torches and pitchforks at your door. You are still one of the most positive people on the planet. ❤❤❤
Haha! Thanks, Michel!
Wat een leuk filmpje, heel herkenbaar! Wat grappig ook dat veel mensen in het engels reageren hieronder. Klagen en doe maar normaal zijn 2 interessante dingen, de generatie van mijn opa en oma had als instelling: niet lullen maar poetsen (hard werken en niet klagen). Er was amper ruimte voor plezier, je moest vooral nuttig zijn. Heeft dit te maken met ons handelsverleden? Met het feit dat we het kapitalisme hebben uitgevonden (het komt van de voc om investeringen in schepen minder risicovol te maken)? Of door het calvinistische geloof? Het lijkt iig haaks op het klagen te staan. Ik zie klagen vooral als iets makkelijks, je kunt zo je frustratie over je leven afreageren op iets buiten jezelf. Ik verwacht dat de komende generaties voor verandering gaan zorgen, door de mentale problemen die steeds meer mensen hebben gaat er hopelijk meer ruimte komen voor ontspanning en zelfontplooiing, minder focus op presteren. Dan is het misschien niet meer nodig om zoveel te klagen en hoeven we ook niet meer per se normaal te doen. Ik heb een droom ;)
As a Dutch person I approve this message
A a Nederlands person I do not
Ik ben nederlander en ben het eens met alle punten. En oh ja, doe niet normaal (…eh…maar ook niet arrogant of brutaal ajb…)
I agree. And I'm Dutch
Alle punten nee eens? Lul niet zo stom man. Wij wassen onze klauwen niet? Geen kritiek op nederland? In een restaurant niet dingen kunnen wijzigingen? Blabla
@@Franco_Bagarella eh.. ja in een kroeg zie je regelmatig dat mannen plassen en weer doorgaan. In een ‘echt’ restaurant kun je wel iets bestellen met een of twee aanpassingen (stuk lastiger bij eetcafe’s, buurtcentra e.d.), maar ook restaurants vragen vaak om speciale dieetwensen bij de reservering al aan te geven. En als je tijdens de dinerdrukte met een hele waslijst aan aanpassingen komt, en daarmee een gerecht compleet kapotmaakt, worden ze echt niet blij van je. En dat we niet goed met kritiek om kunnen gaan,bewijs je nu zelf…
Haha, I think I agree with all of your points! Only in restaurants, I don't encounter so much the 'not possible' attitude, often the restaurants I visit are quite flexible. But great video!
Thank you! And interesting to hear your experience has been different😃
Perhaps the most popular, touristy places have a kind of fixed menu for costs and efficiency and more mature places are more flexible?
As a Dutchy:
1. Yes, correct backpacks on chairs sucks indeed
2. Correct too
3. This is true, we never speak back in Dutch
4. Disagreeing on this one, for the simple fact that a big part of the Netherlands is now an expat or a local with a different ethnic background and they complain and complain about us for decades already and it's really tiring. If we are welcoming and receiving "we are too happy" if we stick to our cultural habits "we are too grumpy" it's never good enough.
5. I always wash my hands and always hear, mostly from women, "oh, you DO wash your hands." so going to agree with this one.
6. We love to be structured, no one should feel special enough thinking they can break this structure - you are like the rest of us (that's the mindset).
7. We complain and never do anything about it, this is indeed dumb.
And lastly, your video feels like genuine feedback and not like an insult - thanks a lot for that, this is really appreciated.
Love this response; thank you! And to be fair, for point number 4, I can also see it from your perspective!
Yeah good thing about point 6! I think for many Dutch people, asking for a special treatment (making a customization) is considered pretentious or conceited.
Number 7: why would we do anything about it? Then we can't complain about it anymore 😂
Number 1 is what I do on purpose. I don't want anyone to have a seat next to me, they have to ask first. I do so too if I wanna sit somewhere. I'm a person who is about ''people must ask for permission for anything if they come near me'', because I don't trust people one bit
@@WonHakWoon Its public transport, you have double digit IQ.
That beginning got me 🤣
This is some high quality content Samuel 🔥
Doe niet normaal! I love it
Haha thank you!
I'm a brit living in NL for nearly 10 years and agree with everything, so you got a laugh from me. The only thing I'd say is, for number 7 I am way worse than the Dutch!
Some things I'd add would be:
* How difficult it is to be spontaneous with Netherlanders as they always seem to have something on their agenda when you *feel* like doing something
* On a similar topic, it can be hard to just go out to grab some food last minute because, again, the restaurants have every table reserved for the next month, even if the place is super basic.
I agree! I typically would've mentioned planning, but I've discussed that concept in previous videos, so I didn't wanna repeat :)
computer says no 🙂
well, I don't go to Michelin star restaurants, but I have no trouble walking in without a reservation, unless it's the busiest night of the week.
The first point is so true! But even for me as a Dutch person, it is sometimes hard. Whenever I can, I try to be spontaneous and allow people to come to my place last-minute, knowing it is uncommon in our culture.
@@thijsgerhardus8672computer is dumb...
Echt heel leuk om jou perspectief te horen, als een Nederlander kan ik hier nog veel van leren!
1. The backpack one is so frustrating and a lot of people think it is, yet everyone does it.
2. The 'doe normaal' mindset is more about not bragging about your wealth or accomplishments, we like to think everyone is the same and you can also see that in the hierarchy at work.
3. You are completely right about that one, I always do it and I have foreign friends that struggle to learn Dutch because of this.
4. I agree on this one again, but I think it also depends on the subject.
5. Personally, I always wash my hands. But I agree a lot of people do it and it's kind of gross haha.
6. I think you are right, but I'm Dutch and I love my structure :D
7. Yep, we do complain a lot haha.
Thanks for the feedback! And for the "doe normaal", I knew some people may not agree with the example, but what I felt Tygo was showing from his response was not wanting exagerrate the potential of or expect too much from the video promotion. And I feel that that ties with putting limits on oneself and not wanting to stand out too much from others. But that's just how I saw it! *and this isn't a diss to Tygo* haha. I believe that this article here explains it well: fitbeauty.nl/waarom-de-doe-maar-normaal-mentaliteit-frustreert/ it's point number 4 under "Deze uitspraak weerhoudt.."
I was typing up my comment, then I realised you mostly said all the things i wanted to say.
@@exploringtheforeignGreat article 👍🏻
Agree on the backpack on the side thing. But when I ask if I can use the seat, I mostly get a smile. Or even a “sorry”. It’s also a habit because of the train floors being so untidy and downright dirty.
Nr.2 well said, hierarchy is less present as is in other countries.
Koning, keizer, admiraal, poepen moeten ze allemaal😂
Some valid points. One i'm finding to be mistaken a lot is " de doe normaal ". For me it just means don't overdo, you have my respect anyway. For me it doesn't make a difference if you work for sanitation or be a high up man in business.
❤😊
this for me it mainly just means don't act like a buffoon in public and respect people
As for 'this isn't possible': people who work in government and/or are not connected to their place of work, will all too easily say your problem does not fit their system and therefore is not their problem. However, there are loads of compassionate people around here who do think along with you. I phoned with some of them within the bureaucracies of the local government, my phone company's customer service, and the national tax office. I always try to provide nice custom solutions for people in my own work. If you think it's bad here, try Germany or Norway. I think on the whole, we've found a nice balance as a society.
In Belgium I once stopped at a station in the early evening, feeling a little peckish. The local sandwich shop was only open during lunch hours, so I went to the snack bar, which was run by a Chinese family, and asked for a 'broodje kroket' (admittedly not a staple in Belgium) and the person helping me answered, we don't have that.
So I'm looking at the snacks on display and I'm thinking, there are the kroketten, there are the buns, where is the problem?
I think it's in accounting.
Yeah agreed. In restaurants and whatnot I've never experienced unwillingness to go off-menu. Government however... ugh. Or huge companies
This video is so well thought out! The consistent centered composition, the little zooms, the seamless transitions, the amazing intro. It was splendid to watch!
And yeah, I have just realized I spoke in English 😂. Over het tassen op de stoel leggen: het is vaak inderdaad een manier om te zorgen dat je alleen zit, maar soms is het ook gewoon prettig om je tas dichtbij je te hebben of niet op de vieze vloer te leggen. Het is een soort luxe!
Heel erg bedankt!
Inderdaad, als het niet druk is zet ik ook m'n tas naast me. Dan wordt ie niet vies, kan ik 'm in de gaten houden en hoef ik 'm niet op schoot te hebben 😅 Zit wel zo lekker. Maar is idd een luxe ja 🤗
Haha ja, als ik zei in de video, ik snap het als de trein niet vol is, maar vaak is het zo dat ook als de trein vol is, mensen zetten nog hun tas op de stoel.
Huidige situatie in de trein: drukke trein, elke zitplek geblockt door een tas 😂. Je hebt de Nederlandse cultuur goed geanalyseerd!
Ik zit in de trein zelden in een coupé, en bijna altijd op een stoeltje bij de in- / uitgang. Ik kan mijn tas dus alleen kwijt op de stoel naast me, of de grond. ALS ik in een coupé zit, doe ik mijn tas ook niet in de opbergruimte. Ik lees / puzzel altijd in de trein. Als ik iedere keer moet opstaan om mijn tas te pakken omdat ik stop met lezen, en wil gaan puzzelen, of omgekeerd, word ik gek, en de mensen die naast me zitten ook.
On a side note : Als je niet wilt dat mensen naast je gaan zitten, laat je tas dan thuis, en stop gewoon met douchen. ;-)
My nationality is Dutch, although I'm nowhere near like a Dutchy .
The " No, that is not possible ", especially with scrambled eggs instead of fried one😤😤😤 makes me hella mad.
People expect things to happen like spoiled brats 😂😂
What I learned by myself was that culture is infinitely facetted and has beauty , if you are willing to listen 😮
Difference does not mean good nor evil, it means other values are applied because of living environment.
Zoiets Nederlands om te zeggen dat je een Nederlander bent maar niet zo een Nederlander 🤪 Grapje 😇☺😉
i think you are entitled if you want something else
Content getting better and better 💯💯
Thanks, fam!
As someone with autism living inside the Netherlands, I have definitely suffered from the "doe normaal" mindset.
When I told people I had autism, they began to talk to me as if I was someone that is slow and dumb. Or they would all of a sudden treat me completely different after learning of that fact. It definitely made me weary of telling people of my autism. Only people on the internet, my friends and my family know that I have autism.
Honestly the people that act that way either don't know how to act around you, as they have never dealt with autism and only know it through who knows Kees. "Waterstofbommen op mofrika gooien". if you get what I mean. Or they are just massive assholes.
Ik ga stuk! Echt om te genieten deze video 😂❤
😂😂🙌🏾
hoe veel stuk heb jij 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Amazing production. Videos keep getting better and better!!
Thank you!
You don't get "Doe normaal". The Dutch are just sober, we usually don't like the fake, overexaggerating, "American" fakeness. While they are sober, they achieved great things. It's one the best countries on the planet. Especially Brabant. The weather can be a bit better.
Just want to let you know that the word you're looking for here is not "sober", but "down to earth". Sober is mostly used when talking about alcohol use. Especially since you mentioned Brabant, since sober isn't the best way to describe us beer loving Brabo's ;)
@@CatBloom42 Act normal because that's crazy enough and keep them in the holes!
@@CatBloom42 Sober CAN be used to describe the nature of people that way; it is an actual definition in the English language, too. It's not just as common as it is in Dutch. :)
@@timonheidema6837 Notice how I said "mostly", not always.
Nah we kunnen echt wel raarder zijn, zeker in brabant. Is toch niet goed dat je een nieuwe haarstijl probeert en binnen een uur heeft ons mam en het hele dorp het er over
I think a lot of immigrants have trouble understanding "doe normaal". It does not mean "act normal". 90% of the time it just means "don't be rude/antisocial/a jerk".
The phrase "niet normaal" means "extraordinary" and can be used in a positive and negative sense.
As a Dutch person going by train to and from work in rush hours it's not that annoying to have to deal with people placing their bags next to them. just ask if you can sit there and they'll move it 99.9% of the time. what IS annoying however is that people will always, and i mean ALWAYS, stay in fron of the train doors in a group making it impossible for people to get out and while you're just trying to exit they will all try to enter at the same time...
Real
Moest laatst de trein nemen in Leiden, ik zat al 20 minuten te watchten in de kou door vertragingen, de trein komt aan (het is spitsuur dus perron is propvol) en het was maar één treinstel di al vanuit schiphol is gekomen, BESEF hoe druk het was
Ik liep elk deur langs en er leek geen plek te zijn, mensen stonden letterlijk gelijk met het deur, maar als je door de ramen keek zag je de coupes nog leeg! Snapte niet waarom mensen gewoon niet door lopen
I was also born and raised in the Netherlands and i remember when i used to take everything so super duper serious, i realized life really wasn't all that fun about taking everything so directly until i changed, now instead of getting mad or angry at one little thing, i often just find an appropriate comment to say and just continue the conversation and be happy i'm talking to said person as they're comfortable to make such remarks if they're in a good will of course. Everyone can be themselves so i'm just happy to have realized that early on in life and not too late to become a grumpy old man.
Still wonder where the mentality comes from.. Parents? Schools? I mean we're told to say no to strangers but i think it's dialed up to 11 here
Some really valid points that I see in my daily life! Good video!
Thanks, Roy!
Pretty fair critisism overall to be fair. I recognize pretty much all of those things from myself or someone in my direct environment :')
#3 is a bit more nuanced though. I don't think most Dutch people mind English becoming bigger in our country at all, the option of English that is. But when bussinesses set up shop in the Netherlands, and especially in big cities this is becoming a problem, do not speak Dutch at all, that does become a bit of a problem. I know two people, my aunt and my sister's husband, who simply aren't super good at learning. They do not speak English so if they walk into a store in their own country and nobody there can even speak the language, that is quite a hinderance. Imagine more and more stores in America that don't even speak English but only Spanish. I bet a lot of Americans would feel the same way about that and I would agree that's equally weird. Sure if you can speak Spanish provide that service to everyone that can benefit from that but at least have a basic understanding of English since that is the primary language of the country you're in. It is kind of weird to need an interpreter to be able to buy something from a store in your own country no matter how many people do speak or even prefer to speak English. Nothing wrong with businesses that can speak both English and Dutch though, it's just the English-only businesses that are quite a problem for some people that literally were born and raised here.
Nice and positive video thanks!
As a dutchmen (have to complain a little😂) i agree with small things like we switch fast to english when we hear a foreign accent. But we are what we are : opportunistic,direct,structural and if you get to know us pretty friendly (apart from dinertime😜). Really Nice that you take the effort to make this video and to have a open mind in it. Take care !
Thank you!
Haha ik doe dit gewoon in het Nederlands voor je om alvast 1 van je klachten te verhelpen. En daar had je helemaal gelijk in trouwens. Het idee van doe normaal vind ik niet helemaal passen bij je punt of theorie. Groots denken zit nog erg in het bloed hier maar het is wel afgezwakt sinds oude tijden. Het idee van doe normaal is meer dat je niet te buitengewoon gedrag of manier van denken moet toepassen maar praktisch moet blijven. Zo krijgen we namelijk al decennia dingen/zaken gedaan. In het geval van tygo zou ik zeggen neem een risico dat mag best. Het geval van “it’s not possible” heb ik ook moeite mee. Zeker bij een servicecenter die je belt moeten ze juist meedenken en zoeken naar oplossing die “wel possible” is. Dat is de hele functie van een service center… en in het restaurant zou ik gelijk zijn opgestaan den weggelopen. Als dat al niet meer kan dan zijn ze je geld niet waard. Roerei, spiegelei weet ik wat allemaal je vraagt geen hogere wiskunde gewoon een andere optie. Die zaak wilt gewoon geen geld verdienen. En als laatste, klagen ja dat kunnen we goed met zijn allen. Maar als alle mensen die hier geboren en getogen zijn nou eens goed gaan kijken naar ver over de grens dan zien ze dat het hier helemaal niet zo slecht is. Tuurlijk zijn er uitdagingen en “crises” maar je zal maar geboren zijn op Haïti of in Syrië of Afghanistan. Dan zit je met tranen in je ogen te kijken naar hoe wij met zijn alleen kunnen klagen over de domste zaken binnen onze grenzen. ✌🏻
I was in Amsterdam in back in 1976, and I saw a man eating a snake at a fish stall. Weird habit.
Great video man, ga zo door!
I always says, people who have everything complains the most!
Dankjewel!
Great video as always, I think we complain to pursue change. Just like you are doing currently with this video, you might me more dutch then you would like to admit ;)
Nice content! #2 on the list with the 'not possible' mindset, Dutch people contradict themselves a bit here. I've worked in many (asian) restaurants and it's only the Dutch customers who wants to alter things on the menu. Like your example with the fried eggs, they often want things to be added, changed into something else or removing it, which in most cases, the restaurant will comply with it. But if it's a Dutch (western) restaurant, they will not comply with your request with 'it's not possible'. Think this one goes a bit hand in hand with the complaining and if the complaint is redirected to them, they have a hard time accepting it.
This was hilarious, Sam!!!! Loving your videos and that you are always respectful of the people of The Netherlands even when pointing out the things you’re learning about the country as an expat. At the end of the day it’s still one of the coolest countries in the world! 😂❤
Not going to lie, I went into this video with a bit of hesitation. I figured u might share something that is just a different perspective ('rude' vs 'direct' culture as a general concept). But damn, everything youve said I agree with a lot. Very very well said. Its great that youre an American that came here, and that you share these perspectives. Some of these things I wouldnt have consciouly thought of.
To be fair though, the reaction on this video seems to be positive, so maybe 4 is a bit more nuanced :P
All jokes aside. I think its a case of "I can talk shit about my mom/family but if you do it ill get mad and defensive". A lot of Dutch people will talk negatively ('complain') about their own country. But when a foreigner gives criticism, we get defensive. I think its part nationalism and part human psychology that its hard to receive criticism. When you criticize your own country, you criticize 'something else', but when an outsider critizes your country: you are part of it so it feels personal. Few countries or people handle criticism well. I think the same would count for America definitely, but also Denmark, France, Great-Britian and other european nations. Its an unfortunate part of our psyche.
Thank you! Glad you were open-minded watching this haha.
Foreigners don't do this:
1. It's far too busy in the trains, and everywhere else, because far too many people came to live here.
2. Doe normaal is about anti-social behaviour, people thinking they are so special the rules don't apply to them. The habit of not bragging or being overly optimistic should not be confused with that.
3. It's simply rude to not make any effort to speak Dutch when you work in a bar or restaurant. It's also rude to start learning Dutch after two years after you found out there is a difference between proficiency and native language and than believe you can use any random person's time to practice while you haven't put in any real effort yet. The level of Dutch in the video won't provoke a reaction in English.
4. Most immigrants critique on the Netherlands comes from myths that go around in their expat bubbles where no one speaks Dutch. I't ill informed usually, and not fully thought through. There is usually a reason behind things they simply didn't think of.
5. If you know better than the cook, cook yourself. They offer you a dish, not personal servants to tell what to prepare how. It's a stupid American habit that only exists because of underpaying staff so they are dependent on tips, it's rude to the waitress and the cook, everywhere outside the USA, and it's even ruder to bring it from the USA, ditch it.
6. Yes we complain. There is not the tiniest bit of relevance to what other countries do worse, why should that be the measure of things?
I was at Hoofddorp station right and there is this doner stand i used to come there often so i know the guy who stands there after 5. He is an Iranian and always when foreigners come he speaks dutch to them on purpose. Thats a very nice thing to see. The food is awesome aswell
I am so upset! Your list is upside down!
haha
The not washing your hands thing makes me go crazy whenever I see it. It’s absolutely disgusting and you have to share things with others.
I personally don’t care if someone is annoyed when I tell them to move their bag. You’re moving it and I’m sitting down. I won :)
The structure thing also annoys me. I love living my life in the moment and I always take the most odd route possible. So when people “stick” to their schedule and plans and always have this structured lifestyle it makes them seem really boring in my eyes. And if you ever want to see them or interact with them, you have to basically schedule with them like an appointment.
And the complaining thing wouldn’t be as bad, if they at least backed it up with real protests. They say so much, but never actually do anything or fight for their rights. It annoys me when we as a majority want change, yet I’m one of the few that actually stand up to do something about it
It's weird, I live in the Netherlands but haven't really encountered it outside of the most disgusting places
maybe because you're dutch. like a native dutchmen. that makes you less prone to seeing these things@@tomfoolery7797
Did you miss all the protests that have happening here
@@sannegodijn301 You mean the farmers that are being a nuisance to the population? that's harassment not protesting. they were hurting/annoying normal citizens and hoping the government would do something about it. That's not a good protest. Besides that I haven't seen any protest of value
@@3elawi i gues you havent been paying attention also protests are supposed be disruptive we also had alot of bus driver protests for better pay and working conditiones how is that not valuable there have been alot of pretests against the royal family and just because you dont think they are valuable doesnt mean they arent
As a Scot living in the Netherlands for the last 13 years, yes to all of this lol ... drives me crazy sometimes 😂
Another thing, or two I would add to this list is lack of common social manners, especially in shops, nobody moves for anybody, its so rude, and that people dont look when they are crossing the road, or leaving a shop, they just come barreling right out, whether it be cars, bikes or pedestrians... I almost had 3 incidents on the 20 minute bike ride to my daughters school... one kid didnt bother to check his right while crossing the street so i gad to slow down quickly, then a man on his bike thought everyone around him was psychic, and then a woman stepped right out onto the bike path and didnt step back to let me pass, or the 4000 students behind me, got a dirty look too ...like, oh come on, how am i in the wrong here?!!! .... and dont get me started on cars who just come out of their driveways or pass parked cars on my side, i stop to let them pass, never a thanks is offered lol
omg the social manners one. i'm dutch myself (born n raised) but i totally agree on it i have had moments where i had panic attacks in the trams and metros because nobody would look around to see if anyone had to get off. so instead i plowed trough while being in a state of pure panic knocking people over and treading on toes. like if i'm in there i always look around to see if anyone needs to get off in wich case i will move my way to the side where possible or angle myself differently so they can schooch by (though in some cases i've also had very out of pocket experiences in the same manner of things where i was perfectly on the side but a woman had to take the side i was standing on to exit the metro. the other side near the door was completely empty and would have easily fit her and her oversized crotch goblin carrier, but no she had to wheel it straight over my feet safe to say if the doors hadn't closed and the train hadn't left that probably would have resulted in a fight and a woman in jail for attacking a minor since i was like 13 at the time)
another good example was in a store when i needed some new underwear, there were two people blocking the path to the undergarments because the lady and her elderly mother (who had a walker) had positioned themselves in such a manner that they could reach the shirts in the other crate but nobody could actually reach the underwear in the other one. i legit felt like a video game character with a routing issue where i walked back and forth becase i just wanted to get to the underwear.. so my social anxiety (and me being a trans man so i didn't want them to question why i was going for the men's boxers) just caused me to error out completely and have a slight panic attack because if there is one thing i do not know what to do is figure out how to get there or wait till they are gone.. and they were taking their sweet old time.
Then go back to Schotland if you miss the social manners.
@@mroozendaal Dit is gw prc punt 4😭😭
@@mroozendaal And there is that exact dutch politenes i was talking about 😂 Manners cost nothing.
In Germany those ignorant people would get a loud "HALLO?"...😂😂😂
I like the waving of both flags, kudos to you! I appreciate your honesty, as always.
I can see that the bag on the seat would be a thing in any big city. It certainly is here in New York. But I do understand, there's a lot going on in the world and people don't have the capacity for other people's space, much less conversation. It's a bit of a sad state of affairs, but who knows? Someone who changes your life could be the very person sitting right next to you. All I know is, I don't care how reluctant you are to move that bag, you're gonna give me my seat that I paid for when I got on this ride! 😆
And I can see how "being normal" is a stabilizing concept. "Don't cause trouble", but many forms of "out of the norm" bring big growth to a society. Up-and-coming artists that put places on the map are usually not "normal". So, I am all about "doe niet normal"!
I will say this, though, "No, it's not possible": I totally understand that! Even as a New Yorker and a believer in "anything is possible", I don't like to ask for unnecessary customization. It's okay to ask, sure. But I also think, as Americans, we expect people to cater to us (consciously or ignorantly so) in a way the rest of the world doesnt. Perhaps I'm wrong, but I feel like what it says on the menu is what it is. "We don't variate. No, we don't serve vegetarian options at our steakhouse! " 🤭I'm just saying...
And the washing of the hands thing, I don't know, you guys need to work that out, 😂. You'd be surprised, that's not a Dutch thing. 😉🤫
Honestly. "Doe normaal" is only the first two words of the original statement "Doe Normaal, dan doe je al gek genoeg" which just means be yourself. for me.
Great video, and I too, as a Dutchie can attest that this is all too accurate. More dutchies should see this, because your approach is very honest, yet gentle. Would do lots of us good to see this video!
Thank you!
dutch people are very good and straight forward , i did lived in the nederlands 10 years, it took me 3 years to speak , i was living in eindhoven for 7 years at the start
As an American who has lived in the UK the past 25 years and has spent a lot of time in the Netherlands... the British do all these things/think this way, too. I'm going to throw some Dutch directness at you and say, I think it's very possible that these things stand out to you as Dutch *and strange* because you haven't travelled widely enough yet to notice it's ingrained elsewhere. It's not just the Dutch! In fact, I'm beginning to think it's Americans who are weird. 😉
I've been to quite a few places, but I've only lived in a handful. So indeed it's hard for me to draw a connection with the culture in the Netherlands to other places because I haven't experienced them on such a level. But I could imagine that a lot of this isn't exclusive to the Netherlands😃
@@exploringtheforeignSam, the Brits complain a lot about the weather too, the weather patterns are very similar, i am dutch, but live in Australia, i had to get used to some strange things they do here, and yes, they also complain...😅
@@Lilygirl283 Do you say 'yeah nah' a lot now? 😅
@@joostdriesens3984yeah nah not a problem
Bro I am with you on the backpack thing. I always pick those seats to annoy the person putting their backpack there.
I think you're spot on with the "doe maar normaal" interpretation. Dutch don't like to see people standing out or bragging, themselves included. But it has two sides and it cabn be annoying or even limiting. Maybe some people wash their hands before they touch there "squire" 😁
I’m traveling in the Netherlands right now. I thought you would say there are almost not toilet and all non-free. I live in Japan, I’m so much used to go to 7-eleven or a supermarket just for that (even free, all have bidet washlet and warm seat in winter).
Good surprise was: even small cities or villages are lively. Just an exemple: Dalen, 4 bars/restaurants, Chinese restaurant, good size supermarket, bakery and dozen of other shops. Dalen barely register on the map how small it is.
Goe bezig maat groeten van Gent België 🇧🇪 🙌
as a dutchie, i agree with the list.. although i do some of them myself. I already speak more english than dutch due to my work and hobby.. And after only a pee, i don't always wash my hands... I learned not to pee on my hands.. but when i feel any splashback, then for sure i wash my hands.
I'm Dutch and I think all your points are valid.
I think complaining comes natural to us because of the wheater 😄
Speaking English in shops annoyed me at first, but as I voted for more Europe I changed my mind😋
Love your enthousiasm in your videos!
I appreciate that! Thanks!
What has voting for more Europe has to do with speaking English, especially since Brexit?
If you are that European minded you ought to speak more German instead, though I'm not that much a fan of the last time more German was spoken in the Netherlands.
@@BlacksmithTWD Ja it has been almost 80 years now. Can we please continue our lives without constantly directly and indirectly referring to WW2..? Thank you! And yes German as a lingua franca is not such a bad idea. After all around 130 million people speak German as their mother language or as a second language. German is the most widely spoken mother language in the European Union and an official language in seven countries. In 42 countries there are more than 7.5 million people who belong to a German-speaking minority. How many people have learned German as a foreign language? 289 million people. According to calculations by Ulrich Ammon, an expert on German language, this is how many people around the globe have learned German at some time in their lives. How well they speak it is another matter entirely. At the moment, 15.4 million people around the world are currently learning German as a foreign language: 90 percent of them are school students and 10 per cent are adults.
As for the shops I'd say that it is important that people who live here learn Dutch, because it's an important part of integrating into Dutch culture. But as mentioned in the video Dutch people will often switch to English. The solution should however be that we stop switching to English so much, instead of stopping to expect immigrants to learn the language. What seems most sensible to me is to keep English as the lingua franca, and besides that language you just speak at least your native language and the language of the country you're living in. If I were to move to France I'd also be expected to learn French, and rightfully so. And that's nothing to do with being pro-Europe or not, I'm very much in favour of more EU, but that doesn't mean we should just stop learning the language of the places where we live.
@@dutchyjhome Seeing how many people are arguing to ignore the neurenberg code now I rather think we should mention and refer to WW2 more often. Though I ought to add that contrary to your assumption I don't constantly directly and indirectly refer to WW2. That aside, I'm glad you at least understood the other part of my statement and provided the substantiation for it.
Mijn expat-buren antwoorden me in het engels als ik ze in het Nederlands aanspreek. Een van hen spreekt verstaanbaar Nederlands, maar doet het liever niet. En in de horeca zou je mogen verwachten dat de mensen in de bediening wat basiswoordjes kennen, maar helaas. In de trein je tas op de stoel naast je laten staan is gewoon onbeschoft, en niet typisch Nederlands.
If you ask me to, I'll speak Dutch instead of English. So, here we go:
1. Klagen is heerlijk en helpt dingen verbeteren. Het zou wel beter zijn als we ook vaker dankbaarheid uitspraken.
2. Van dat 'Dat is onmogelijk' wil ik ook af. (Laatst was ik in de bus en iemand wilde met de bus, maar had alleen contant geld. De buschauffeur had met zijn eigen bankpas een kaartje voor haar kunnen kopen en dan het geld kunnen aannemen, maar dat deed hij niet. Natuurlijk voorkomt zulke striktheid corruptie en fraude: Als de buschauffeur bijvoorbeeld zomaar het contante geld had aangenomen en haar had laten instappen, had hij waarschijnlijk al het geld zelf gehouden in plaats van dat het ook werd geregistreerd en gedeeltelijk naar het bedrijf ging. Toch gaan we hierin te ver.)
3. Veel mannen vegen niet af na het plassen en wassen daarom hun handen dan ook niet, maar als vrouw vind ik dat ook een vies idee.
4. Ja, het is jammer. Nederlanders vinden het makkelijker om te klagen dan gewoon dankbaar te zijn voor hun land, dus moeten ze andere landen neerhalen om hun trots te laten zien.
5. Als je zegt in het Nederlands te willen praten, doen we dat, maar als je dat niet zegt, kun je overkomen alsof je vreest dat ik geen Engels kan, maar veel liever Engels praat.
6. De 'doe normaal'-mindset vind ik wel lekker makkelijk, maar als iemand wat meer afwijkt, vind ik niet dat mensen dat mogen veroordelen.
7. Rugtassen op stoelen moeten inderdaad niet kunnen in een drukke trein.
I will answer in english because i cannot yet answer in Dutch and since i am on phone its bothersome to type and use translator for some words on same device. The problem with the idea of "if you ask to speak dutch then we will" is that it works only for actual conversations with but most interactions alwith strangers are short. Like if i buy a coffee, 90% of time just seller speaks in english to me despite i asked in dutch. You wouldnt ask them to speak dutch because the conversation is about to end. Those interactions are short but help a lot with breakong language barrier because you wont suddenly speak good dutch, you need some very simple practice first. Generally its good if dutch talked in dutch with foregners who talk dutch to them (even if its absolutely awful).
My mom doesnt speak english and learn dutch but they just simply try to speak english with her. For example in hospital when they see she doesnt speak english and her dutch is still very bad, they simply ignore her (in a sense that they dont engage in questioning her in any way even though she can answe some things like name, date of birth etc (and that is what they needed)).
Anyway. Dutch first, english later is a good approach.
P.s. if you have desire to answer: what is the fundamental difference between eens, maar and even when talking imperative? Internet has very loose explanation of these and generalise it. So i would like to know how to determine what each of them brings to the sentence
Ga eens naar buiten! 'Eens' implies that it wants the listener to follow immediately, although it won't deal any consequences for ignoring it . 'Ga eens naar buiten! Het is tijd!' = 'Ga naar buiten. En wel nu, alsjeblieft? Het is tijd!'
Ga maar naar buiten. 'Maar' turns the imperative into a helpful suggestion. 'Wil je even uitwaaien? Dat is goed. Ga maar naar buiten.' = 'Wil je even uitwaaien? Dat is goed. Ga naar buiten, als je dat fijn vindt.'
It may be used in a more sarcastic manner. 'Laat maar zitten.' = 'Het zou beter zijn voor iedereen als we dit onderwerp laten zitten.' The (emotional) context explains the reason.
Ga even naar buiten. 'Even' means that following the imperative shouldn't take too much time (and effort). Therefore, the imperative is not too much to ask from the other. Therefore, the other is expected to follow it willingly without long consideration. 'Die ruzie van net? Volgens mij zit je daarmee nog steeds in je vel. Ga even naar buiten: even afkoelen.' = 'Die ruzie van net? Volgens mij zit je daarmee nog steeds in je vel. Ga naar buiten. Dat kost niet zoveel moeite. Dan kun je afkoelen. Dat kost niet zoveel moeite.'
'Ga maar eens naar buiten.' = 'Ga nu direct naar buiten - als je wil.'
'Ga eens even naar buiten.' = 'Ga naar buiten. Doe het snel. Zoveel moeite kost dat niet.'
'Ga maar even naar buiten.' = 'Ga naar buiten als je wil. Zoveel moeite kost dat niet.'
'Ga maar eens even naar buiten.' = 'Ga nu direct naar buiten als je wil. Zoveel moeite kost dat niet.'
@@infj4w511 Wow, that was actually really good explanation and with excellent examples. Thank you for your help =)
No problem! I'm glad to hear it was helpful@@ojgfhuebsrnvn2781
I notice that a lot of Dutch people are really arguing with you on the "doe normaal" mindset. They really badly want to soften it. But I am affraid that you are quite right. As a society, we try to preserve our sense of self-worthy by making sure nobody else is noticably better than us. Just a personal example: Our high-schools are split in different education levels and I was in the highest one. My teachers and my parents were very pre-occupied with telling me that this did not make me better than anyone. I could really not be publically proud of what made me special, even though as a shrill four-eyed kid it really was all I had going for me.
Even now I feel awkward for typing this. It is such a faux-pas. I think Dutch society could be nicer still if we allowed other people their pride, even if it shows inadequacies in ourselves.
The reason why Do Normaal mindset is so important for is is because of our history, without that mindset our country would have been torn apart.
You can totally have pride in what you do, just don't become too full of yourself and announce everywhere how great you are
@@teaser6089 With all due respect, my personal experience appearantly wildly differs from yours. I am happy for you for that but it does not invalidate my story in the slightest.
Nice video man keep it up 👍
Thank you!
Customizing food in a restaraunt is a weird and mostly American thing that is actually annoying. In Japan asking to replace or remove ingredients is even considered offensive in some cases. And I like that. Just eat what the chef has created. Unless you have some dietary restrictions of course but even in that case you probably should order a different dish then. I have never in my life asked to customize an order unless it was an explicit thing you can do on the menu.
A few people have commented something similar to this, and I'm slowly starting to see it from this perspective as well! :)
If you don't like it, there's 190 other countries where you can make videos.
"doe normaal" is more along the lines of 'don't be wierd' and 'don't embarrass yourself'.
Alright, I'm prepared to receive some mix reactions on this one haha. Also, yes I would have planning on this, but I've discussed that topic quite a bit in other videos, so I left it off.
For the non-Dutch viewers, I noticed that I missed adding a translation at 1:10 in the video. But there I say "you need to be more optimistic" and "that's such a Dutch response"
You were more than fair, though at point 2 you reminded me a little of jan peter balkenende hahahaha! As a Dutchie myself I can speak to point 4 as well. Dutch people love to critique Americans but often overlook the fact that they aren't the judges of rationality they consider themselves to be. A little more kindness and less judgment towards everyone would serve us all. Much love!!
i was the one from the intro
with the orange flag
@nnlarmy Hey!! Thank you for your help, man! I hope you enjoyed the video!
Spot on!
Btw, your programs are so insightful and of high quality you should think about 'doing' other countries. Expand 'THE FOREIGN', so to speak.
Thank you!! And slowly but surely I'll branch out to other places as well. But with me living in the Netherlands, most of my experiences/insights are here at the moment😃
As a Dutchman I couldn't agree with you more. Most of us have a toxic mentality which makes them think they're perfect and bette than any country. Well, we're not perfect at all. They're many things I can name that other countries do better at than the Netherlands. And I also hate this "doe normaal" thing. It just puts so much pressure on me that I feel embarrassed to just be outside in even the slightest. I just wanna be myself. But apparently that's not allowed in this Boring society.
You gotta just "doe niet normaal"!😁
name a few things, please. cause i dont see it
Like what?
Ik zelf zet mijn tas alleen naast mij neer als ik zie dat het niet druk is en als ik merk dat het druk word zet ik mijn tas op mijn schoot
"Doe niet normaal" love it. Especially since normal is getting worse and worse.
A lot of these things come from the fact that Holland is so densely populated. So there are many rules to live by. And efficiency is also necessary
I think you misinterpreted Tygo's modesty for an "act normal" mindset, and customer service in the US is too much focused on pleasing the customer according to most Europeans (it's not just a Dutch thing), but other than that, I do agree with your points. Most of those annoy me too sometimes...
This was so accurate. I live in Belgium but 6 of 7 things were the same. Only diffrence is that sometimes they will adapt something if you ask. The rest 100% same here in Belgium 😅.
No you don't get kicked out. We may look annoyed by criticism, but in fact we like it. We do it ourselfs all the time!
Thats why you lose your country!
The switching to English is so extremely true, I have been a private Dutch speaker and this is a main annoyance for many of my students (to be fair, some should force themselves to speak more, but still it applies).
Over het algemeen klopt het wel. Zelfs het feit dat Nederlanders volhardend zijn om Engels te praten of te schrijven, zie vele reacties. 😜 Leuke video. 👍🏻
the first one, while i accept why you might find it a bit annoying, most people just really dont want to interact with people they dont know, they just wanna go to work/school and back home. its also most common that this backpack thing is done in the silent coupes of trains, where its already weird to sit next to someone, let alone someone you dont know.
I think most of your complaints are valid. To number 7 you can add people talking in the silence sections of the trains as well. The one I kinda half disagree with is that "act normal" isn't so much about not thinking big, but about not standing out too much. I think it has its upsides and downsides. It can mean that people aren't allowed to be themselves or different (bad), but it can also mean not annoying random strangers and making things about you all the time (good). Other than that, it's all accurate.
Oh yeah, it sucks. It's annoying, I always get extremely mad, when people talk while they are seated in a silence section. I mean, why TF do you think I wanna be seated there?
Trains have silence sections?
One thing that annoys me, being a Dutch person myself, is the inclination of many people to have an opinion about everything, even when such people are not 'hindered by any knowledge' as a literal translation of a Dutch expression goes, rather than being a bit more modest and simply admit 'I don't know enough about so I won't say anything about it'. For example when something in a foreign country happens, and everyone has a strong opinion about it, not taking into account that people from other cultures might see things very differently, or when judging what some specialist or politician _should_ have done, etc.
Directness - not all Dutch are equally direct. It's mostly a 'randstad' (or Western Netherlands) thing, I think. I'm originally from a region in the Netherlands where more indirect speech is common, where you have to infer what is _not_ being said, and I had to actively get used to that 'directness' when I started to live in the Western part of the country 25 years ago.
As for directness vs. rudeness - to me the dividing line is the question whether any practical purpose is served with it, and whether or not it could have been achieved differently.
For example - suppose you're a manager and you have this person in your team that really thinks he is extraordinary and should be treated as such, whereas in reality he's underperforming and just obstructing the flow in the department. In that case, you may need to have a very unpleasant discussion with that individual, not sugarcoating anything, just in order to get it perfectly clear to him that he should really adapt, or else. That's directness, in my view.
Needlessly offending or hurting anyone where it serves no practical goal isn't directness - that's rudeness. Doesn't matter if people _call_ it 'directness' and say 'Hey, I'm just saying what I think!'
0:54 Look mom I made it into Sam's video! ❤
😂😂🙌🏾🙌🏾
I much prefer a down to earth Dutch 'doe normaal' attitude over the hysterical attitudes, exaggerated fake friendliness, self-entitlement and bragging culture that Americans typically display. As a Frisian, I find Hollanders to already be too hysterical for my liking. They could definitely do with turning it down a notch, rather than turning it up.
Good point on the hand washing though. That is just disgusting.
As a Dutch person: Fair enough!
'Doe normaal' is used when people are acting way out of pocket. Like screaming, or being a nuisance to other people. It literally means 'act normal', don't be an idiot
as a Dutch person, I will shed my light on these:
1. yes, sometimes we want to sit alone. But it's mostly uncomfortable to put your bag in front of you or on your lap and when no one's gonna sit next to you anyway, why not put it on the other seat?
2. Doe normaal is not associated with fear of standing out or failing or any fear at all. It's about not wanting to stand out for superficial reasons, desperately trying to gain attention. As you mentioned, many things were accomplished by Dutch people. Doe normaal means 1) don't go around showing off and 2) just behave in a public setting and show some respect.
Ex-prime minister said: "Doe normaal of ga weg." Meaning: either adapt and behave, or leave. It's got two meanings, really, but I feel like neither come from a place of fear. it's also quite superficial i think? like, it's about behaviour.
you can dream big, but don't show it. put that energy into realizing your dream rather than talking about it (personal interpretation alert)
3. this is a valid point. nothing to add.
4. I think we are pretty good at mocking ourselves. it's just when a non-Dutch person does so, we get so needlessly defensive (this comment of mine being a prime example of course :))
5. girls mostly wash their hands
6. i have too little experience to say anything about this. we do have a highly customizable menu at McDonald's tho
- edit: it might also be more cost& time efficient to not want to deviate from the default. we are a practical country
7. yes, we complain too much. although somehow, we are consistently one of the happiest countries in the world.
Thanks for your detailed response!
To add more context to my point about "doe normal", I feel this article explains it well: fitbeauty.nl/waarom-de-doe-maar-normaal-mentaliteit-frustreert/
Specifically point number 4 under "deze afspraak weerhoudt"
The complaining even continues when the Dutch go abroad for vacation. I go to Austria every Summer vacation and I hear a lot about how panicked the Dutch are and how complaining they can be, yet Austrians prefer the Dutch over Germans. Germans literally ruin everything and are very disrespectful. This is what locals said to us themselves.
I think complaining is not only to make things stay as they are. It is also good tool to point out things you dont like and go wrong and get them addressed :p
I am on the floor with laughter...you've got it down in a humorous way. Obviously, these are very small things in this vid - and as with your others - is in the right spirit of appreciation and fun. Well done, guy.
😂😂 thank you!
As a Dutch guy living in the US I can say I feel the exact same about "American exceptionalism" Many people here see themselves as the hero in their own stories and will take any minor set-back as some kind of dishonor upon their family. (another fun American trope that marketing companies seem to have definitely figured out) Things are done so much more efficiently when people figure out that: No, you are not the hero. No, we need to do this together for it to work. No, you do make mistakes, and so do I. and Yes, we can overcome these things together.
Yeah I 100% prefer the Doe Normaal mindset, it keeps people down to earth and at least curtails arrogance
as a dutch introvert, no i will not stop putting my backpack on the seat next to me and if you sit down next to me i will get up and leave
haha!
Whahaha, da's a goeie, gelijk heb je😂👍🏼
Ik ga tegenwoordig niet eens meer zitten (maar reis ook eigenlijk niet langer me de trein dan het stukje Den Haag CS - R'dam CS); leun wel ergens tegen een trapleuning of muur aan.
I recognize the examples you give. And indeed, we Dutchies like to complain; klagen, or as we say in the Nijmegen dialect, nuilen.
stop promoting a country that is full.
Recently I went to a pub for a cup of coffee. The waitress didn´t speak Dutch so I tried English. Nope. German, nope. French, nope. All I got was a blank stare. Still don´t know what language it was that she did actually speak because she didn´t say a word. So I went next door and got a cup of coffee immediately when I asked in Dutch.
It breaks my heart to see the Dutch are facing genocidal displacement migration too. All indigenous European ancestral homelands seem to be being invaded and the indigenous peoples eradicated. I don't understand how everyone is okay with this. I love their cultures, their contributions to humanity are off the richter scale. We owe them enough to not genocide them.
Het is simpel, we hebben allen een mond die we kunnen opentrekken als we ergens zo graag willen zitten waar een tas staat. Ik zet mijn tas ook altijd naast me, ben soms moe en overprikkeld en dan extra behoefte aan dat niemand binnen mijn personal space gaat zitten. En daarbuiten, ik heb echt een grote backpack en zit ook veel in treinen die geen rek hebben boven mijn hoofd om 'm in te doen.
Message from a foreigner to the Americans, stop doing this as if your way of life is the only "right" way... 😢
Not mad at all, cause its mostly true. About the 'doe maar normaal' culture: its imbedded in our culture. We dont mind if you make millions a year, as long as you act normal. Dont build a mansion when you are surrounded by small houses, dont Drive a 1m car when people around you have 'normal' cars. We share a very small place of earth with almost 18m people, and we all have to get along. So as long as you act 'normal' its all good. So its not that we dont want people to excell, we just dont like people bragging about it :)
As a Dutch person i do find it annoying and outright rude that if you start living here you refuse to take Dutch classes and learn the language and i HATE that the government does not do sh*t about it either (The Dutch government is overall useless and filled with pocket fillers anyway and hate their own kind) and yea Dutch people do love their complaining no matter what it is as we say ''Dat is echt typisch Hollands'' (That is really typically Dutch) and we also do love our structures yea but it is mainly because of our stone old education system where children are basically educated to become factory workers and become yes men and yes women (i think the factory worker education system is 60+ years old) and we also like to plan things days or even weeks beforehand so even if we do say ''i got nothing to do today'' does not always mean we'll hang with you.. not because we don't like you or anything but we just planned to do nothing today to have a day of me time and we also tend to be very direct and say what's on our minds and we also don't do it to be mean we just don't put layers upon layers of sugar coating on what we say no means no yes means yes
Nice one!
I watched another vid just now, the one on what not to take for granted..and something occured to me..
The "doe normaal" and "its impossible" limiting mindsets might be an unwanted sideeffect of the "not keeping up with the Jones" thing. I love the " work to live dont live to work" lifestyle and for there to be no need to "be better than.." its a comfortable place to be... but it might make us a little too comfortable at times. Where it gets weird if you dare to want more. And it might even make some people unwilling to do anything more than the bare minimum required. Which would explain the " its impossible" mindset.
It can be limiting and annoying to be around haha it good to have them pointed out like this!
Kinda fun to consider these things.. thanks!
Appreciate a healthy dose of constructive criticism like this vid it helps us stay openminded and connected.
as a dutch person who has to take the train to school every day, I will NOT stop putting my bag next to me but thanks.
Yeah the thing about not washing the hands is totally true and also apply to Dutch women. I am disgusted by it as I do wash my hands very often and thoroughly as a nurse.