I'm so sorry. Have you thought about going to the board of elders? With that said, they may not turn out to be supportive due to their biases. Proceed with caution. I pray you will get a reprieve. Warmly, Annette
There’s a nuance I’ve personally experienced that I don’t hear much. If you have Cerebral Palsy, for example you have very hard time just exiting one living situation for another even with supports. If your parents are like gambling all their and the Social Security check they can liquidate all the money within the home. The parents can then tell the CP child to get credit cards to pay household bills once the paychecks are gambled away. The parents threaten the child with CP with eviction if they don’t pay the bills. SO the child pays the bills on their “own volition”. Ive seen this reported and the authorities say the child is acting of their own volition.
Writing while listening... The parent would absolutely do the silent treatment and sulk questioning the love of the child when they try to save their money for bills instead of giving it to the parent to "earn money gambling".
This is considered dependent adult abuse and is reportable to Adult Protective Services in at least California, and I suspect it is also in other states.
@dianesellers2654 that's the thing. I worked for Orange County ARC in California 18y and wrote APS out there, for clients. I've written 4 reports out here (you can't call in Manatee County) and when I was able to catch their one call per report. They told me if you have a medical issue call 911 otherwise don't bother. Yeah I'm beyond frustrated
@@pauldutcher9105 Yeah, I get that with CPS, too. Very frustrating! I wonder if Pacific Justice Institute could help with this? They have offices across the country. I refer to them frequently when 1st amend rights are being violated. They are a great non-profit. Check them out!
Hi Paul, I'm so sorry for all you are going through and that Adult Protective Services was not helpful. It's imperative that you set the boundary that you will not pay ANY monies to support gambling or that will allow a parent to shift their financial responsibilities onto you. A boundary is not what you tell them to do. It is what you tell them you will do if they do not comply and then follow through with the boundary you set and don't back down regardless of the chaos to follow. That's the only way they will learn that your monies are not available to pay bills they are responsible for. Take real good care of yourself first. Warmly, Annette@@pauldutcher9105
It’s painful to give ourselves and feel unappreciated, especially after all your efforts. Your worth and contributions matter. You deserve to be valued and respected.
Thanks for this! Living with a pastor who financially abuses is a living nightmare!
I'm so sorry. Have you thought about going to the board of elders? With that said, they may not turn out to be supportive due to their biases. Proceed with caution. I pray you will get a reprieve. Warmly, Annette
Thank you so much Annette.
You’re so welcome. Take good care. Annette
There’s a nuance I’ve personally experienced that I don’t hear much. If you have Cerebral Palsy, for example you have very hard time just exiting one living situation for another even with supports. If your parents are like gambling all their and the Social Security check they can liquidate all the money within the home. The parents can then tell the CP child to get credit cards to pay household bills once the paychecks are gambled away. The parents threaten the child with CP with eviction if they don’t pay the bills. SO the child pays the bills on their “own volition”. Ive seen this reported and the authorities say the child is acting of their own volition.
Writing while listening... The parent would absolutely do the silent treatment and sulk questioning the love of the child when they try to save their money for bills instead of giving it to the parent to "earn money gambling".
This is considered dependent adult abuse and is reportable to Adult Protective Services in at least California, and I suspect it is also in other states.
@dianesellers2654 that's the thing. I worked for Orange County ARC in California 18y and wrote APS out there, for clients. I've written 4 reports out here (you can't call in Manatee County) and when I was able to catch their one call per report. They told me if you have a medical issue call 911 otherwise don't bother. Yeah I'm beyond frustrated
@@pauldutcher9105 Yeah, I get that with CPS, too. Very frustrating! I wonder if Pacific Justice Institute could help with this? They have offices across the country. I refer to them frequently when 1st amend rights are being violated. They are a great non-profit. Check them out!
Hi Paul, I'm so sorry for all you are going through and that Adult Protective Services was not helpful. It's imperative that you set the boundary that you will not pay ANY monies to support gambling or that will allow a parent to shift their financial responsibilities onto you. A boundary is not what you tell them to do. It is what you tell them you will do if they do not comply and then follow through with the boundary you set and don't back down regardless of the chaos to follow. That's the only way they will learn that your monies are not available to pay bills they are responsible for. Take real good care of yourself first. Warmly, Annette@@pauldutcher9105
No he has always worked … wanted me to cook and clean I did that a long time ago he never appreciated it
It’s painful to give ourselves and feel unappreciated, especially after all your efforts. Your worth and contributions matter. You deserve to be valued and respected.