How Do I "Keep The Course" When It Feels Like There's No Hope?
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 1 ต.ค. 2024
- There are 5 things you can do if you’re in a place where you’re asking, “How do I keep going?” or, “How do I “keep the course?” (especially when it feels like there is no hope for your marriage).
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Perhaps you started out with a laser focus; you were driven. You wanted to save your marriage. You wanted to stop your divorce. You wanted to stop the fights.
And then, you found Marriage Helper where you got tools and guidance for what you needed to do for you and your relationship…
You started doing it… but something happened. You got off course. You’re left wondering whether or not you can keep going... but don’t give up! You CAN get back on track. It is possible!
At Marriage Helper, we teach you how to develop foundational strategies and habits, where you understand what you need to do in order to make the relationship work.
But times can be tough. Life can throw a lot of curveballs and leave you reeling… but we’re here to help you start getting back on track TODAY. You can do it!
Without further ado, here are 5 things you can do to keep the course when “life happens” and it seems like there’s no hope for your marriage.
First, set aside a time of gratitude each day. Write down 3 things you’re thankful for each day. Second, remember your GOAL- your vision; Your WHY! Third, exercise regularly. Get your blood flowing- even a 10 minute walk. Exercise has such a positive impact on you and your hormones! Fourth, allow time for yourself. Make time each day to do something you enjoy! Fifth, take it one day at a time. You can get back on track. You can do this. (And, you can stay on track!)
Remember the acronym GREAT- Gratitude, Remembering Your Vision, Exercising, Allowing Time For “You” & Taking It One Day At A Time.
Know that our team at Marriage Helper is rooting for you! We are here to help every step of the way with resources, teachings & tools- for you and your relationship!
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I love this G.R.E.A.T advice (and the acronym, too 😉). Thanks for making it so straightforward!
G - GRATITUDE Everyday
R - REMEMBER Your Vision
E - EXERCISE Regularly
A - ALLOW Time For Yourself
T - TAKE It One Day At A Time
+++++
I wish advice like this was taught everywhere. (At the start and end of each school year, Jr High, High School & even in College... To every couple, especially at the time they get married... At the start of every pregnancy, and after every birth... At the start of every new job. It's such crucial wisdom!)
I don't know if you will see this but I want to thank you. Most of all for helping me keep hope alive. I was separated for nearly 4 months. My wife comes back TODAY!!! I didn't do it perfect but I followed your PIES. Made changes to myself to stop being controlling. Your advice WORKS. My Wife was slow to see the changes but she did a 180 and is coming back home today to stay. Your videos really kept me going during some dark days. Thank you for helping me with hope and to not give up!.
Glad you are on the road to recovery.
Inspirational man! I’m waiting… thanks for sharing.
Praise God! Thanks for sharing
Hope things are still going in the right direction! Blessings.
@Collins Visual yes, Thank God they are
This is hard but I am going to keep trying. Because I love her!
I'm staying on course by heavy prayer and I've learned to endure patiently
I have learned to endure life paciently.. strong focus on not just me.. but the marriage itself. Meditation and lots of prayer really truly works. But alot of other way and methods will work if you put you mind to it and dedicate yourself. Dont give up! Love the help and advice .. keep the videos and courses going. Always hear with open ears and a open clear mind and ready for any other help and advice anytime. Thanks so much for your couching amd giving me a little more hope than I had before. Once again.. I truly truly thanks you. ☺❤🖒
@@bankscheryl4a lpp0qp q
Praying for my marriage to be restored..please help me pray?
Wow this was for me . I felt like giving up on my goal. I have been giving in so much without any appreciation or recognition. I wanted to give myself a break , stop and focused on me .
I am staying on course because I love my wife.
Kimberly I just love you, you are so inspiring. So very helpful thank you from the bottom of my heart.❤
I'm grateful for these videos from Kimberly.
Just had another fight with my partner and I lost my cool...I can't believe that this video popped up in my feed...that's what I needed. Thank you
My issue is other people trying to 'help' our marriage. Marriage counsellor asside, lots of ppl in my ear and in my wifes ear (i have found) make things worse.
Yep,this evening I was at a platonic female friends house,we are both from the same area in the uk,and both now living in Spain,she has been here longer,she’s been going through a break up too,for many years,her husband has done some rotten things,and she has been like me,too easy going,tonight she had too many to drink,now she messaged me getting nasty that if I don’t “Man up and f##@ my wife off,”Don’t be walked over like I have been” saying she will have a go at my wife instead !! I really do not need her interfering in my business,so have to break the friendship off,one thing being a supportive ear to each other,but jeez,really ??!!!
@@terrysteward im sorry thats happening to you. Its hard enough without people transferring their own situation or thoughts onto you.
I'm just letting go .I can't keep trying for someone who can't decide
My wife and I have been separated for almost 2 months but apart for nearly 6 months. She says I’m a good father and a good husband but she’s just not sure she’s in love with me anymore. It hurts everyday. We’ve been together for 12 years and I love her so much. She’s been bipolar her whole life but only recently started taking medication to combat it. I ask her to work on the marriage together and she says she needs to fix herself first. I feel like I’m in limbo. Everyone keeps saying to find happiness in yourself, but so much of my happiness was with my family. I’m trying to wait and be patient, but it’s just so hard when I’ll I can think of is hoping she’ll call, text, or want to see me. I appreciate the marriage helper videos and wish I could afford the counseling. I just feel lost and alone so much of the time, and when I try and talk to friends/family they just get mad at my wife and tell me all the things she’s doing that is wrong. It’s so hard to have hope when I’m the only one trying, and thinking what if all this trying just leads to her leaving anyway. I just wish the sadness would go away. I’m going to do the things that this video recommended and hope for the best.
I'm sorry to hear that you're in pain. The feeling of living in limbo sucks so bad. I can only imagine how bad your heart must feel each day.
While I know that everyone's situation is unique and no one can truly know how another person is feeling, I think I feel some of your pain. I'm currently close to a 3 month separation and I don't know when the pain will be over. I'm scared, confused, anxious, and sad. I'm doing my best to put in the hard work, but in the end, my marriage might still be over. During this current pandemic, I feel like I'm all alone because I can't hang out with my friends. My brain won't stop seeing all the possible negative outcomes.
What keeps me going? I keep working on myself. Some days are harder than others, but I know that all I can do is work on mine own issues. What happens if my marriage still crumbles and fails? Well, I'll know that I did everything I could to make it work. And, I'll come out the other side as an improved man.
Try to find a really good friend that will let you vent your feelings. I sometimes think that my friends don't want to be bothered with my woes, so I won't talk to them about my situation. But... It felt really good to talk with a friend and let it all out.
I don't know you at all. I don't know your life or situation. But I could hear the pain in your words. Please stay strong. Don't give up. Keep working on being the best person you can be.
Wow your situation is almost exactly like mine, everything I do at the moment seems to go wrong because I can't get over the pain inside me. Have thing got any better for you?
I’m in this same position. My husband left after confessing an affair with a much younger woman. I feel all those things every day. Weekends are tough bc we always did family things. I’ve been w my partner since I was 19 and it just feels surreal. I’d love to know how you are doing :)
How are you now bro?
Hey Tyler! Can you give us an update bro? Hope all is well.
Thank you for this. I look forward to these inspirational words. It’s so hard to keep the course. But I know it will be worth it.
Where is the healthy perspective on "how long"? Some are hanging on with no signs of hope years after divorce.
I'm trying my best to be a better man and working on myself.
In the middle of the storm. I’m working on myself and doing a lot of online studying with Marriige, children etc.. thank you.. your beautiful advice yes! I am taking notes
I am trying to be positive...he has just been building a wall. Selfish and super absorbed in only wanting to leave and find himself...my sleep has been severely effected and thinking of work is making me anxious. I am at a loss. Three kids. Two sons and a daughter and he devotes all his affection towards her. Yep. Not sure where to go from here.
That’s exactly how I feel
I'm really having a hard time with reconciliation. She doesn't have any more patience with me. I'd like to talk to someone
I hope you and your wife are doing better now. I saw your comment and I'm in the same situation.
How do you keep fighting and keep the course when the other person sayingbje gives up he doesn't even want to try
I am in the same boat- mine is obsessed with another woman and has changed his life to the point it isn’t compatible with our family even if he did give up his girlfriend. If love keeps you in a bad situation then it’s not love. Sometimes love for him looks like boundaries being held firm. Prayers for you Kellie. God is good and will make up for life’s unfairness, just stay on gods path and do what is right no matter what.
What if in 5 months nothing has changed, my wife is cold and doesn’t reply to my txts, she says we’re different people want different things and will go about them in different ways. We have no kids no real assets been married 5 years. She won’t respond even when I just ask how she’s doing, she doesn’t want anything to do with me. She asked for a divorce in February. I have been doing my pies and engaging in smart contact but nothing seems to be shifting
My husband doesn't call me anymore. Would me calling him or sending him text messages a PUSH behavior?
Lord 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
Thank you so much for these messages, they really do help.
My fiance told me to text him at least once a day. There's a physical absence from him, right now, because of important things he has to do before we can get married. I camp, and hike. Gotta join a gym, because it's something that will help me feel better about myself. Deciding to get married was/currently is something that is intentional. Sometimes just daily life feels overwhelming, because of being the kind of worker that I am: and school is also a part of my journey, and it effects him, too. But I practice my pies, and now I'm going to practice this, as well.
These educational videos are helpful, for sure. It helps me know deeply that I am made for the man that asked me to marry him. Life is a process, and it's the little things that make every down turn a little bit more enjoyable when you pick yourself back up and dust yourself off to stay on the journey.
There is hope, I am good enough, she is good enough, the marriage is worth it. Thank you MH.
After 5 years of separation I am losing hope. I am doing PIES (about 27 days) and now have started the marriage course. Covid stopped us from seeing each other, texting happening but feeling like “why”
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Do your ,methods apply to long-term relationships?
Thank you for your video. I will keep on track and keep my vision clear
We want to hear from you!! What are some ways you are "staying on course?" Comment below!
I pray, pray and pray! That’s what keeps me grounded cause I can’t do this without God’s grace I can’t possibly live in this marriage where lying and cheating have been done with no revelation of truth ..that would be a good thing for Marriage Helper to address..how do you deal with infidelity that won’t be admitted too ...when your spouse cheats but won’t admit it ...it’s so hard but God is good ..I stand in my marriage for my children and grandchildren ...!
I pray and use the SMM Facebook group. Though the W just does not want to fix it. I have hope.
Working out puts me back on track mentally. The natural dopamine dump gets me thinking clearly again. Then it's easy to get backnon course.
I am working on my PIES. Its difficult as we are in the middle of a custody battle. I have to sit and listen to her in the court room lie about me, say things that aren't true, and twist things to fit her narrative. It's hard to keep loving her during this. And this is all coming from her family. I'm not sure if I will ever get my wife back.
Great advice
You are really helping me to get thru a bad situation, thank You!
Thank you so much @michaelmoran6405. We truly appreciate your comment and are grateful to have you as part of our community here on TH-cam. Please, don't hesitate to reach out to us if there's anything else we can do for you. marriagehelper.com/marriage-strategy-call/
Blessings,
Thank u
I’m just a f up and I don’t belong in this world
None of us belong here. If you believe in Jesus Christ, you will go to your rightful home some day. This world is cruel and a constant battle.
It’s a hard world Snoopy. Stay strong. You never know what tomorrow can bring.
Snoopy W, your words are familiar to me because I've told myself similar things. I don't know you or what you're going through, but with certainty I know God loves you and He's there for you.
Margaret Barry sure appreciate all the kindness your showing me. Guess I don’t have anything but Gods love rt now
My mood has been up volatile because of my husband’s infidelity. I hope this can help me.
Pour vous mettre encore plus à l'aise je peut vous la garantis je suis pas là pour faire la course pour avoir l'amour non non je ne suis pas