CREAM: Did Ginger Baker Secretly Write This Song About Jack Bruce?

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 27 ก.ย. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 103

  • @rmlln2722
    @rmlln2722 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

    Eric was known as "Captain Madman" in late '66, early '67

  • @StephenMitchell-g9e
    @StephenMitchell-g9e 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +11

    My friends and I were always frustrated that just as it was coming to the boil, it faded out! What priceless treasures we may have been denied.

  • @atiostefony3760
    @atiostefony3760 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    Cool Cool Cool, that Double LP is one of the best in history

    • @tommy8058
      @tommy8058 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Oh yes.😊👍

  • @MarcWilliams-v9w
    @MarcWilliams-v9w หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    As a poet myself, a nice interpretation of lyrics from one of my favourite boyhood bands.

  • @charlesseiderman29
    @charlesseiderman29 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    Interesting! Gingers calmly singing while he's drumming out always amazed me, and Claptons jam at the end tops it all off! Great cut..

  • @atiostefony3760
    @atiostefony3760 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Just saw a new old clip from CREAM, in 1993 and Jack is saying "Eric was Captian Madman"

  • @robertwener4561
    @robertwener4561 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    In the mid-80s, I saw The Ginger Baker Trio perform the song in east London. What I remember is that he had a glint in his eye, and a smirk on his face as he droned through it.

  • @johnidan6264
    @johnidan6264 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I heard a story about a fan sending a written note into Gingers tour bus many years after Cream, the note asked Who are Pressed Rat and Warthog? After a short while a hand written answer appeared out from the tour bus replying, Pressed Rat and Warthog, naturally!

  • @TheStrongBoyz19
    @TheStrongBoyz19 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

    I always love this song on the album. lol The album does have some of the band's best tracks.

    • @JamesHargreavesGuitar
      @JamesHargreavesGuitar  6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Possibly my favourite album of all time

    • @TheStrongBoyz19
      @TheStrongBoyz19 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I was just thinking about that as a guess since they are your favourite band. lol

    • @drewzamir9516
      @drewzamir9516 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Cool song

  • @gingerbaker_toad696
    @gingerbaker_toad696 5 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Such a GREAT video! Absolutely love it :)

  • @matcoffidis1135
    @matcoffidis1135 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    This is so interesting. I love these kinda backstories. You make these informative and fun. Thank you...👍✌️

  • @wmarkfish
    @wmarkfish 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    What a relief. I thought it was about me in my drug addled paranoia. I’m so glad to know ginger wasn’t reading my mind from 3000 miles away.

  • @davidstodel8618
    @davidstodel8618 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    '' Collection of Dog Legs and Feet'' - perhaps a reference to Ginger's stable and the shape of the horses' legs?

    • @chrishills2427
      @chrishills2427 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Before he got into horses

    • @Zharkov1969A
      @Zharkov1969A 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @@chrishills2427I was going to make the same point myself. He only got into horses in the 70s I think.

    • @robkoral489
      @robkoral489 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      This analysis is plausible, especially when taking into account the fact that Eric was nicknamed Captain Madman by the band in the early days. In my opinion it was Eric who broke up Cream.

  • @shaunw9270
    @shaunw9270 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    The quote you put on screen about bluesmen wearing striped ties is from a great book "Escaping the Delta" by Elijah Wald. It's not only the real story of Robert Johnson, it also describes in detail, what life and the music scene was like in the prewar Mississippi Delta.

    • @jimbrennan1181
      @jimbrennan1181 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Thanks, I'm going to try to find that title.

    • @tonypickles2389
      @tonypickles2389 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Yes, great book

  • @neilfranklin5644
    @neilfranklin5644 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    Makes too much sense for the 60's

  • @edgaraquino2324
    @edgaraquino2324 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Very nice analysis!😊 reflecting on it, this would be something that Ginger would come up with concerning Jack...

  • @tomfisher2103
    @tomfisher2103 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    All three great musicians. Ginger is a legend of rock drummers. No secret he and Jack Bruce hated each other. Gingers temper by all accounts was off the rails. Beware Mr. Baker

  • @philbrown1474
    @philbrown1474 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Very good video. I’ve always thought the song meant something referring to each member. Captain Madman was Clapton’s nickname. In retrospect I think you’ve hit it in the head.

  • @theorchardhouse4635
    @theorchardhouse4635 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Thanks for another great video! - love the channel. Two comments, Could the collection of "dog legs and feet" be the 3 Floor tom legs, which have a "dog leg" bend, and the "feet" be the hi-hat and Bass drum pedals which are "foot" shaped"? Also, near the end there is a melody played on the Bass, which is often said to be from Vaughan Williams "Fantasia on Greensleeves" and is said to be the folk song "Lovely Joan" - I think it is actually from the "Folk Song Suite", a different composition entirely, and is a tune called "Green Bushes". Just My 2 cents worth! - Thanks!

    • @GilObregon-hj6zh
      @GilObregon-hj6zh 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      How about the dog legs (and) feet being representative
      of "just" the bass drum pedals -- the feet being the pads
      (or, whatever they're called). Ginger would have had a "collection" of them.

  • @chrishills2427
    @chrishills2427 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Ginger didn't get into horses until the early 70's. I'd wager that Stigwood was in mind somewhere in the track

  • @AdyJohnsonVideo
    @AdyJohnsonVideo 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +10

    I enjoyed your analysis and I'm sure you're on to something! I'm almost certain I've seen an interview with Jack Bruce where he nostalgically talks about the band's camaraderie in the early days and that they'd given each other playful nicknames. Jack's was Captain Madman..?! I believe it was an interview on an older Cream documentary... I had it on VHS. Early 90's. Trying to find it... maybe someone will beat me to it? In addition somethings telling me that PRAWH may have derived from a comic strip...? Great song - great band.

    • @chrishills2427
      @chrishills2427 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      Thats right but it was Eric who was Captain madman

    • @AdyJohnsonVideo
      @AdyJohnsonVideo 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@chrishills2427 I had feeling that was the case! Thanks

  • @mikem6384
    @mikem6384 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    An entire composition about Stigwood, perhaps? Did he favor nautical attire 😄
    Is Cream itself the pegleg, propping up Stigwood, who laughed (at prospect of touring exhaustion..) and stomped off with a gait of arrogance, and later becoming deroga-tory about Cream upon learning of their plan, ie his pegleg breaking into three, ordering the fated final album and tour.

    • @robertellison4691
      @robertellison4691 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I just saw the video from 1993 of Ginger Baker stating that they called Eric Bad Captain Madman, not Jack.

  • @GilObregon-hj6zh
    @GilObregon-hj6zh 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Pressed Rat could stand for, "pressed flat" -- which could describe Eric's emotional disposition, by that time (?).

    • @JamesHargreavesGuitar
      @JamesHargreavesGuitar  6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I actually thought this could have been shorthand for (de)pressed rat

    • @GilObregon-hj6zh
      @GilObregon-hj6zh 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@JamesHargreavesGuitar I was thinking in terms of that British play-on-words term -- I forgot the term name. Such as: "rusty knife" for wife. Or "bottle of water" for daughter...... Etcetera. Maybe, "da pressed flat/rat"!
      Or, how about pressed flat "rat" = roadkill. The constant touring (life on the road) was killing Eric.

  • @charlesneil2983
    @charlesneil2983 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Pressed Rat etc has some of the best licks that Eric ever hit and Ginger's mania. It's a great song.

  • @TheCybird
    @TheCybird 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    WOW i like all your vdos, you are well read. i am 75 and i had a few cream albums and they were part of my top loved music.
    PR +W I always wondered, and liked the music, i guess we will never know what it means, but many writers were into nonscense lyrics, like dylan, paul and george. A few writers would take word clippings and jumble them up to compose the lyrics.
    thanks your doing a great job.

  • @sparrow5442
    @sparrow5442 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Great video , i am aspiring musician who plays drums but also wants to write . My heroes are Noel G , Dave Grohl , Morissey, Kurt Cobain Robbie Williams and you . I pive your videos and watch you lots . Your an amazing musician who i look up too and want to be like . Your very clever . Im 13 and want to be a rockstar , you video on how to be the biggest band in Britain gave me great ideas

  • @Jeff-q4u
    @Jeff-q4u 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I always listen to your voice and drift off a little, like your reading me a story....and then you say "drug fuelled bollocks!"
    😮

  • @terencedoherty3049
    @terencedoherty3049 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    There's a few things wrong with this story. For one thing, Ginger didn't even get into polo or horses or jodhpurs or any of that until much later (around the early 90s I think). Also, "Captain Madman" was the group's nickname for Eric, not for Jack. Personally, I don't buy your explanation. I think it was Ginger's attempt to write a song that was like the old "Jazz and Poetry" stuff they grew up on, and basically doesn't mean much of anything. That's why he threw in a few double entendres such as "nautical gate" and "deroga tree."

  • @sinenkaari5477
    @sinenkaari5477 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I think at the time in 68 Ginger was not into Polo yet. It was when he went to Africa in early seventies that he was introduced to Polo, just put on a horses back and he loved it immedialy, the guy had said to him when he saw how he droke his car that "the way you drive you should play polo" . And for the more psychedelic part Ginger has the animal Rat in the day he was born in the chinese zodiac. He's animals are Day of the Rat, Month of the Monkey and year of the Rabbit. All Cream members have a Monkey in their chart.

  • @nightshiftblues
    @nightshiftblues 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Were you at the Clapton-Newcastle show Thursday?

  • @scottbivins4051
    @scottbivins4051 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I think you nailed it brow.

  • @stevedavajon2194
    @stevedavajon2194 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Pressed Rat being Ginger his collection of dog legs I would interpret as his drum sticks and his feet is that he uses his feet when he plays.

  • @donaldnelson8764
    @donaldnelson8764 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Spot on.

  • @jimbrennan1181
    @jimbrennan1181 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Very interesting, but not really surprising. I totally believe this interpretation. Cream was destined to break up because as we know Ginger hated Jack but agreed to the union because Eric thought that he was the best choice at the time. It was destined to fail from the start. I wonder what would have happened if Eric had formed Cream with a different drummer.

    • @robkoral489
      @robkoral489 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Fail???? They were massive and produced magical music.

    • @jimbrennan1181
      @jimbrennan1181 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@robkoral489 I meant that the band was destined to fail in terms of staying together.

  • @drewzamir9516
    @drewzamir9516 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    My favorite song prest rat cool

  • @foffasgaming6492
    @foffasgaming6492 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    hiya, sorry to ask about melodies again but would it be possible for you to make a video on how you write melodies for your songs

  • @touranzohdy2861
    @touranzohdy2861 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    It all fits EXCEPT for the striped tie. The timeline does not match. While it's true that Eric Clapton's biggest influence, Robert Johnson, is wearing a striped tie in the picture where he's dressed very dapper and holding a Gibson L-1, that picture did not surface till the late 1980s. Cream would not have known of its existence in 1968 when "Pressed Rat and Warthog" was released.

  • @jonashallberg2832
    @jonashallberg2832 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Actually ginger formed cream

    • @GilObregon-hj6zh
      @GilObregon-hj6zh 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Well, Ginger did suggest the idea to Eric -- while still a member of the Graham Bond Organization -- but without Eric's approval, Cream would have never happened. That is, the trio with Jack included.

  • @leekalerzcallaghan9654
    @leekalerzcallaghan9654 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Collection of dog legs and feet.
    His Spare drum/stand parts?

  • @AreJayCee
    @AreJayCee 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Kinda like slagging a mate behind his back. Not very becoming You got something to say say it or stay quiet.

  • @robertcatesby8420
    @robertcatesby8420 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

    And monkeys might fly out of my butt. Baker was the madman of the group, having twice pulled knives on Jack. He was a violent guy. He wasn't supposed to be in Blind Faith. He heard about Clapton and Winwood starting a group and just showed up. Clapton was horrified as he wanted to get away from both Jack and Ginger, especially Ginger.

  • @Flukey_1970
    @Flukey_1970 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Great stuff! Am sure you are not far from the truth.

  • @scottbivins4051
    @scottbivins4051 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Dod legs and feet has something to do with H in my opinion because its Gingers character the Rat. We all know drumming is painful. Or else its a referance to playing the drums. Nope nope its Heroin!

  • @jacquesjandot7878
    @jacquesjandot7878 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Hello, now if we accept the idea that atonal apples refer to Ginger's drums, amplified heat to Eric's lead guitar, why not consider that doglegs and feet represent Jack's fingers running on the bass neck? Being myself a songwriter (Bluefield/ France) I may get a better insight into lyrics, although, of course, I can be totally mistaken. Yet I think my proposal makes sense... Bluefield (Occitanie/ France)(= Jacques Jandot, on TH-cam)

  • @paulissus8974
    @paulissus8974 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I wonder why Baker never appears on any prestigious list of great musicians? Maybe it had something to do with him being a shitty drummer.

  • @sinenkaari5477
    @sinenkaari5477 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Jack the sack

  • @FuckYouWhosNext
    @FuckYouWhosNext 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Brilliant!!

  • @honkynel
    @honkynel 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    I agree with you, it's exactly about, what you just said. It's not random or nonsense but most probably d-f'd.

  • @chrishills2427
    @chrishills2427 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

    Captain Madman was the nickname they had for Clapton

  • @Bill-l7g
    @Bill-l7g 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Jack and Ginger had history before Cream and surprisingly Ginger invited him to join the band despite disliking him .
    None of them considered themselves to be a rock band . Ginger joked that it was a jazz band but they haven’t told Eric . Eric considered himself a blues man .
    My friend , Jim Marshall to the famous photo on the Cream album of the standing backstage at Fillmore West . There were just too many egos in close proximity and Ginger was notorious for his temper , which could be violent so I imagine it got to be much for Eric .

  • @sjporter51
    @sjporter51 หลายเดือนก่อน

    In the Video "Fresh Live Cream" Jack states that Eric was "Captain Madman". I think your basically on the right track though about it being about the breakup of the band. I would offer this as my theory :
    Atonal Apples - Jacks free wheeling bass style which Ginger oftern had issues with
    Amplified Heat - Erics playing, load and hot!
    Pressed rats collection of dog legs and feet. - Drumsticks and drum pedals perhaps?
    I think for the most part, it was Eric who ultimately decided to break up the band. He "ordered their fate"
    Eric - Captain Madman
    Jack - Warthog
    Ginger - Pressed Rat.

  • @beepbeepnj2658
    @beepbeepnj2658 หลายเดือนก่อน

    How could it be deafening? They had 100 watts for guitar, 100 watts for bass and 200 watts for the pa system and no mics on drums or monitors most of the time.

  • @Bmille1965
    @Bmille1965 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

    th-cam.com/video/2cFNi-tkLkc/w-d-xo.html Jack said Eric was Captain Madman

  • @tristangossman8910
    @tristangossman8910 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Love this song and cream...however that picture of Robert Johnson was not found or really released to the public anyhow until 1990. When hus complete works came out...the only picture then was the cigarette picture...Clapton did write the liner notes for that Robert Johnson box set however...

  • @peteholder7134
    @peteholder7134 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    That photo of Robert Johnson was not discovered until 1972 or 3 and not published until 1989.

  • @alexbowman7582
    @alexbowman7582 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    If you know musicians pop stars then it’s obviously a clash of egos.

  • @GilObregon-hj6zh
    @GilObregon-hj6zh 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    (? )Robert StigWOOD = Pegleg (WOODen).

    • @JamesHargreavesGuitar
      @JamesHargreavesGuitar  6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      A very interesting point. Stigwood could be peg leg.

    • @GilObregon-hj6zh
      @GilObregon-hj6zh 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      So, "would" Stiggy have been the "wood worm"
      (infection)? Certain reports claimed that he had
      some sort of wormy tendencies! 😬

    • @el0blaino
      @el0blaino 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@GilObregon-hj6zh I agree with this. Peg leg / woodworm / tree-three ... It's not bad for a ship's captain to have a peg leg, it's kind of what a captain as a character would have, it goes with being a captain, like a hat, a parrot, etc. The problem was when that captain's leg got "woodworm" - Stig-wood. So the trouble comes from him personally or from the band's label/managers.

    • @GilObregon-hj6zh
      @GilObregon-hj6zh 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I now think that Jack Bruce could be Warthog. Could be descriptive of his sometimes "pushy" ways. And of his
      two semi-protruding upper canine teeth (or whatever
      they're called!). Actually, Ginger had those also, didn't he?
      I wish that I would make up my mind!!

  • @DrTomoculus
    @DrTomoculus 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I think you're spot on. Digs in songs are commonplace. If George Harrison is going to name drop a Beatles song, 99% of the time it's going to be a McCartney song he name drops. It makes the line "we all know Ob La Di Bla Da, but can you show me where you are?" stand out. The song's about Eric Clapton and his sweet tooth. But this one line, is kind of out of place. Why would he need to know where Eric is in regards to his teeth. And knowing the recording of this song went on a long, long, long time, it may be Harrison airing complaint. Because "Not Guilty" saying what it says, ain't going to make a Beatles album. Though he had right to defend his choices after "Sexy Sadie" kind of makes him out to be a fool. And McCartney may have distanced himself from the man, but not the organisation Transcendental Meditation. Which pulls in loads of money every year, has a very rich clientele, and is just about as legit as Scientology as far as I'm concerned. (no offense to scientologists)

    • @PaperBanjo64
      @PaperBanjo64 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Wait...transcendental meditation is an organization? I thought it was just a religious practice

    • @DrTomoculus
      @DrTomoculus 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @@PaperBanjo64 Yup.

  • @alexbowman7582
    @alexbowman7582 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Everyone raves on about Clapton but to me Bruce’s bass playing is far better, it’s jazz.

  • @damianrf6309
    @damianrf6309 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Could “dog leg” be a golfing reference?

  • @gingerbaker_toad696
    @gingerbaker_toad696 5 วันที่ผ่านมา

    🤟👹❤️

  • @fshoaps
    @fshoaps 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    0:16 - thank you so much for calling it was it was. 'Lennon-esque'. He is a god, and still unsung to this day.

  • @timmotel5804
    @timmotel5804 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Good Day & WoW! Excellent as always. I'm 72. Great Band, Great Musicians, Great Time For Music.
    Thank You for turning me on to: "Me & Mr. Johnson" & What a Bringdown".
    Best Regards

  • @londontokyo8307
    @londontokyo8307 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Dog leg can mean to take a sharp turn in a different direction. I'll leave it to anybody else to work out the relevance to the song. Btw, I always thought this song was a a bit silly, but you've made sense of the nonsensical.

  • @elmolewis9123
    @elmolewis9123 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Nice one!

  • @howardjohnston6112
    @howardjohnston6112 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I'm afraid your interpretation is not entirely correct. PR&W is about the end of the band. But it's not aimed at Jack or at any of them directly. Your biggest mistake is assuming the bad Captain Madman was Jack Bruce. He wasn't. "Captain Madman" was actually Eric Clapton. He got the nickname in their early days - when they were a bit dadaist - around the Disraeli Gears period. the identity of the other two has never been expressly revealed but it's generally assumed (as you said) that Pressed Rat was Ginger Baker and Warthog was Jack Bruce. "The bad Captain Madman had ordered their fate" was Eric telling Ginger (and probably Jack) that he'd had enough of the endless touring without breaks etc. (plus other frictions in the band). All the rest of it is just psychedelic nonsense rhymes. Ginger, bless him, was notorious for re-writing the band's history. They all actually exaggerated and mixed up events in their later recollections. So the shop was actually Ginger's & Jack's. It is of course light-hearted and a bit like the way that The Beatles wrote about each other (and others - Savoy Truffle by George Harrison is about Eric Clapton who had a very sweet tooth).Robert Johnson's tie is far too much of a reach . . .

    • @GilObregon-hj6zh
      @GilObregon-hj6zh 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      What was "pressed-ratty" -- so to speak -- about Ginger?

    • @999fedora
      @999fedora 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Ginger Baker would never have written a song identifying Jack Bruce as the "Captain" of the band. Right from day one Ginger always believed Cream was his band. He had the idea of creating a super group with Eric Clapton and Jack Bruce was the last to join. In Ginger Bakers mind, the least important.

    • @GilObregon-hj6zh
      @GilObregon-hj6zh 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@999fedora And in BAKER'S mind, I'm sure that Bruce was the last guy that he wanted on bass!! So, that makes me wonder who HE would have favored to fill that position (??).

    • @999fedora
      @999fedora 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@GilObregon-hj6zh As far as i know Ginger Baker have never mentioned any alternative to Jack Bruce. In a 4 part interview for Forbes magazine Ginger Baker said "Originally Cream was my idea. I told Eric I was getting a band together, and would he be interested? Eric said yeah, but asked about bass. He really wanted Jack, the best bass player around, so we agreed Jack was the one." My guess is Ginger Baker thought if he did not agree to Jack Bruce, Eric Clapton would back out.

    • @GilObregon-hj6zh
      @GilObregon-hj6zh 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@999fedora Yea, but -- to "agree" to have Bruce in the band and to personally WANT to have him as the 3rd member could have been two different matters/thoughts, entirely.

  • @sinenkaari5477
    @sinenkaari5477 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    That part "never came back" is like a quote from Hit The Road Jack

  • @jono1457-qd9ft
    @jono1457-qd9ft 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Deep man 😮

  • @robertellison4691
    @robertellison4691 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    In a 1993 interview, Ginger states that he and Jack called Eric Mad Captain Badman.

  • @darrylmars
    @darrylmars 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    My first album & still a favorite. Assumed Pressed Rat was an old English fairy tale. My guess is Ginger's meth habit was hard to take