VERSE 1 I know its unexpected Just give me a second I need to sorry for the things I did to you When you were younger To you and your mother If only I’d have know back then the damage it would do PRE I’ve watched you fight with addiction and struggle with commitment Couldn’t help but think of you as a thorn in my side Withdrew my affection to teach you a lesson oh, what a waste of our time CHORUS But there’s no knock on my door There’s no please can we talk No sorry for all of the pain that I caused We’re not sat in my kitchen with quiet forgiveness I thought you would find your way here but you didn’t I’ll write myself the apology I’ll never receive VERSE 2 Too young at eleven to learn of deception Standing on the doorstep you were screaming out my name The day I got married I know you were angry But that’s a conversation I’m not brave enough to face So I kept you at a distance Watched you try to fix it See the pain written on your face it reminds me of her Its hard remember all our years together And I hate that it hurts CHORUS But there’s no knock on my door There’s no please can we talk No sorry for all of the pain that I caused We’re not sat in my kitchen with quiet forgiveness I thought you would find your way here but you didn’t I’ll write myself the apology I’ll never receive OUTRO I can’t keep on waiting For you to say sorry All of the anger it’s poisoned body If you you ever listen to this song I’ve written I want you to know you’re already forgiven
Holy cow!!! This almost describes how I found out about my biological father at 11 years old. And he never actually accepted me as his daughter in anyway; even to his death in Aug. 2020. I met him once at 18 yrs old. 😢
Sat here listening to this on repeat, bawling my eyes out for both parents I'll never hear apologies from. Great advice to write that apology myself. I'm still working through the pain, not quite ready for the forgiveness, but this song helps. Found you from your ADHD content, found your music and was amazed.
as a daughter who has a narcissistic father this song hits hard and hits home because I will never get the apology from him!!! thank you for writing this song !!!!!
I feel this. My mother is a narcissist. Has been my whole life. She's said sorry but I can tell it's crocodile tears. I'm 21tomorrow and she's still the same. One day I'll leave tho. And even tho it will break my inner child I have to do it. I'm gonna do it for myself.
@@elizabethhinklehinkle5393that's the thing its hard trust me. I'm 32 years old and I had to walk away from my dad when i was 29 years old. It broke my inner child but it's made me see that my dad isn't the father or could be the father I wanted from him. I hope you are okay and happy 21st birthday :) :)
My mom is the narcissist. I need to write myself the apology I won't receive. Tired of feeling worthless because the person who supposed to love me deemed it so.
This os the most healing song ive heard in forever. I first heard it on a day i knew my dad planned to talk to me and fully blame me for all of our problems again and demand i do various things to make up for it. I am working on leaving and the moment i am gone, i look forward to being able to let go and forgive without havingbthe trauma continuously reintroduced into my life. I am so grateful for my fiance who has sat beside me throughout my healing journey and i look forward to a future where we heal and grow together. ❤
Absolutely beautiful!! Thank you for writing and releasing this to help so many of us who are trying to heal from the toxic places we came from. Completely crying listening to this, Thank-you 💖
i couldn't possibly explain how much this song means to me. but as someone who's had to make my peace with the fact that i'll never get that apology from either of my abusive parents, i feel this song right down into my soul. thank you. not just for writing this, but being brave enough to share your pain in your music. i know that's probably not easy, but you're helping more people than you could ever know
I held it together pretty well up until the 1:50 mark...I literally felt that vocal pitch change in my fucking soul and could not stop crying afterwards. Beautiful lyrics, beautiful song, and a beautiful artist
when you become a parent, its like reliving all of that trauma again. but this time its different. its even more heartbreaking. thank you for this beautiful song. its already changed my world. thank you.
This stopped me dead last night. We may not need the same apology, but we certainly need a very similar one. Family tree finally helped me open up to the truth, and this new beautifully captivating song has opened the truth a little deeper. Your honesty has finally helped me start writing the book I've buried deep inside my pain for years. Roxanne, I'm so sorry you feel pain so profound that it touches such deep pain within others. You are incredibly brave. And beautiful and I thank you so so much.❤x
Cannot thank you enough for this. Started today crying because my dad doesn't text me back when I check on him or ever call to see how I'm doing. Growing up with two alcoholic and violently abusive parents was difficult. But what's most unbearable is being an adult now and still trying harder then they ever did to bring peace to our family. I see you and love it 🥰 you deserve an apology 💚 🤗
And so do you I understand the alcoholic abuse my mother did to me made me always try to be more for everyone and I never had a chance to talk about it to my mom she passed away on Thanksgiving alone and I was never going to be able to get a apology but you don't let your efforts make you feel less than your brighter and bolder and more precious then anyone who doesn't see your love
Those of us who have been neglected and abuse at the hands of the ones we loved and were supposed to be protected by try so fucking hard in our adult lives to give everyone we meet the love and support we never had no matter how much it hurts us in the end. We just don't want anyone to feel what we have or do feel. It hurts us at our core to see someone hurting so we are there for everyone like we hoped and prayed someone would be for us.......
I am so incredibly sorry to read this, and it resonates deeply. The scares run so incredibly deep don't they... It isn't your responsibility to heal a parent, or keep peace in your family. That belongs to the parents. You never to deserved to be put in that role. I hope you find your own peace, with your own chosen family, and begin to understand how loveable you you are, and that you don't have to "work" to be loved. xx
honestly, sometimes you've got to learn when to just let go. and i say that as someone who spent the better part of my adulthood chasing after scraps of affection from my parents and having to mourn the fact that i'd never have the mom or dad that other people had. but if you just keep pouring more and more of yourself into a relationship that's totally one sided, at a certain point, you have to ask yourself hard questions, like is it worth it. and if it's not, if you're getting nothing back except pain, then it might be time to let go. i know how hard it is, but i also know that i feel freer and lighter than ever, now that i've made my peace with being an emotional orphan. because now i know it's not my fault. i tried. i did everything i could. i tried so hard to make them hear me. but i finally realized that my parents' failure to listen was tHEIR failure, not mine. i didn't deserve to be ignored, cast aside, or treated like i didn't matter. its what happened, but none of it was on ME. and realizing that helped me so much. it also helped me see that i deserved better. that i deserved to be getting what i was giving, because i'm WORTH the love and attention. and if they can't see that, then they're the ones missing out, not me
Girl (not to assume gender), you gotta give that shit up. You're wasting love, effort, and attention on people who do not deserve it in the least. That's like pouring liquid gold down into a dried up old well that hasn't worked in years. Save all that for people who will love you as much as you love them. Life is too short to waste that on abusive alkie low-lives.
Omg your family at the end 😢😢💔 So glad you finally found happiness with them. One of my absolute favourites because the saddest ones always are. Beautiful song and this video is perfect with Rich and your step daughter running in ❤❤ xxx
I’ve watched your videos on adhd with your husband for years. Enjoyed the cute little skits. And always I see how loved you are in your hurt. I see a woman healing from everyone that hurt her through education of those who love her. I found out you have a musical career like 15 minutes ago, bought all the songs I could based on one snippet from Instagram. I’m not disappointed as this is the first song of yours I hear all the way through. I will never receive an apology from my dad for all the trauma he has caused me and continues to cause me. Neither will my sister for her second hand and now first hand trauma. It’s so nice to feel that I’m not alone. I’ve been trying to follow your path of healing through education of my loved ones, but it’s not always easy and they don’t always listen or follow through. I need to write all the apologies I will never be given. For her. For that little girl inside me that just wants to feel loved and worthwhile. Thank you. So much. For everything you do. For sharing who you are with the world. In the least creepy way I can say it, we love you, Rory. And I hope to keep watching you grow and heal, leading the way for us to follow.
Robin hold on 🩵 new year is almost here. You didn’t deserve what happened to you and I am so so sorry. But there is hope of healing - sending love. I hope you have support 🙏🏼
Not me crying because I feel it so much. I will wait for my father to apologise in all eternity but I hope that I will be deep enough into recovery one day that I will be able to forgive him for everything he has done. Thank you so much for this song ❤️
I relate to this so much with my situation with my mother. I just went no contact with her almost 8 months ago and it still hurts so much. I know she’ll never apologize for all the pain she put me through and she’s painted me as the villain to everyone around her. This song is helping me heal 🖤
I’m in tears. I grew up in a very abusive home and my abuser to this day refuses to admit she even did anything wrong… keeping this trauma to myself is KILLING me. This song helped me release this pain. I love your music. Can’t wait till you’re a huge success and I can say I was here when you only had 20k subs 😂🎉🖤 you’re helping people with your music what an incredible accomplishment 🖤🥹
Rory, I will say it over and over, your voice, singing and your songs are on another level that every artist should look up to. You are simply amazing, you have a fan for life.
I have never had a song I connect with on such a deep level. Thank you for for putting such deep emotions within your song and connecting with us in way I never thought possible ❤
This lady is out of the world..one of the best and biggest star I have ever heard...her voice is so beautiful ..it's goes so well with what she is singing all throughout...too young at 11 to learn about deception..so cool and beautiful
Real tears, real wounds and a real heartfelt hug at the end. You get this all the time, but your music truly is something special that resonates deeply.
Thank you for sharing your pain, your heart and creating this beautiful song and hits so incredibly deep. I know I'm not the only one, but I NEEDED this song at this time in my life. My abusive father is dying. He was still so horrible during my last visit. The last several months I've been coming to terms with the fact that I'll never get an apology from him. I have to focus on healing myself regarding of what he does. Thank you ❤ And I'm so sorry, you deserve so much better.
this song made me cry . WOW . I felt every single note of this. I don't know you but I feel proud of you. My dad was not an easy man, he caused pain and he passed a few years ago . I have been working on forgiving him and I think I am almost there, though the apology and all I needed from him I will not get . Your song has inspired me to write a poem giving myself the apology I won't receive. 🥰💚❤
It's heart-breaking to see so many comments with people feeling similar. I can't identify directly, but I wanted to let you know that it is not you, it is them, there is nothing you did wrong and it's their loss.
Have only just had the courage to listen to this song in full. I spent years in therapy not understanding why i just couldn't bring myself to let go of the anger and let it damage me so much. I needed that anger to get myself free. I needed it to get me where i needed to be. And now ive freed myself, and proved to myself that i can live out his worst fears... that i can survive without him; i can finally work on forgiveness. The space the anger and fear and loneliness lived is now full of love for my little one, and admiration for my partner, and determination to prove im the one to end the generational trauma
@@tlrsmom in all honesty I didn't even realise I'd released it until he tried to get back in touch and I sat back and looked at my little family and realised that he'd played a huge part in how I grew up and in my mental health and how I saw myself - but that was it. It wasn't the anger that was driving me anymore; it was love. Love for my partner who supported me through everything and love for my mum and my best friend and especially my little one. I didn't turn into who I'd dreamed of being, or who I was terrified of being, but the person I wished I'd had as a child. One day you'll get there I promise. You'll wake up and realise that you're free. In my mind it's not bravery or resilience, it's just finding peace after chaos. And i promise you, at some point you will find that peace too
Thank you Rory, for sharing your story in songs with us! I decided to make your beautiful music part of my healing journey. I don't really have a connection to my dad who left when I was like 9. I guess I was "only" emotional neglected but man it still hurts. Last year I tried to talk to my dad about what he had done to me...but he couldn't/ wouldn't talk about it. Life is hard when you feel like you're not important (enough). Still struggle to this day to connect with others... Your songs help a lot!! Finally someone who understands my feelings on a different level. Wish you all the best!! ❤
That's what finally made me cry 🥲 All i have is my husband & new son, I'm No Contact with my entire family of origin. Definitely see myself reflected in the song but especially the last scene 😭 Sending you a big, comforting hug!! 🫂❤❤❤
Ahhh... you got me, RORY! I'm sold! Let me put you up as my new YT vocal mentor! I feel every vibe of each cord, every word, all the pain, all the sounds, and the whole story-I've been there for 30 years of my life! You are an amazing artist! I'm glad I discovered your music!!!!!! ADHD or NOT YOU ROCK!!!!! Thank you for being YOU!!!! x
I just sat in my car and cried so hard. This song is absolutely touching my heart and I just let the emotions pour out as I felt them. Thank you so much for sharing your stories and your music with the world, you have such a HUGE impact and you are truly just a wonderful warrior soul that I admire ❤️🩹🤍🖤❤️🔥
oh my god thank you for having your family come in and hug you because I spent the majority of this video thinking someone needs to give you a hug! Oh my god is this song emotional and you sing it so beautifully. Stay awesome
watching it a second time and crying my eyes out again. Got my own personal tragic story matching your lyrics so much. I know from experience how things like that really feel and being almost 54 by now, I carry such things for so many many years and it does NOT heal the slightest bit. I hope for you the music made it all better to cope n deal with it n to make it hurt less.
Honestly Rory has easily become one of my favourite artists, every song she puts out hits home. I really hope she goes on tour at some point because I cant wait to scream these lyrics from the crowd
I found this song through tiktok a couple of months ago and i wanted to be the end of the song saying 'your are already forgiven" i am now at that point after losing my dad on June 26 2024. this has been my favorite song and a play it on repeat. I listened to it the last day I went to see him before he died after not seeing him for two years. this is my comfort song right now it says all that i can't.
@@lulusplayhouse9757 sending so much love. I am so so sorry for all of the pain that you went through, that was never ever yours to deal with. Losing him must have been so hard and confusing and I am so grateful you could find some comfort in this song.
I am very happy I found this, it was at the right time. I've been so angry at my parent's for things that I know now weren't their choice/things they wanted. I wont ever get those apologies, they have both passed. I'm now having to learn to let go of that anger and forgive them and myself. This really helps ❤.
I can't help but tear up when I hear this. I know our stories are different, but you're able to capture those feelings in an incredible way. Thank you for sharing your story.
Every time I watch this I am begging Rich to rush in and comfort you. I have shared this with so many people and every single one is able to identify with your songs.
Dear Rory thank you for writing and singing music like yours things that you've been through and how you've become stronger from your experiences the world needs more artists like you. I want to comment on this song that you've written i grew up in a house where there was abuse by my father , he always said how useless and pathetic we are and called us all sorts of names and he always yelled and never talked and he was physically abusive as well and voilent. He cheated on my mom on several occasions and by the time i was 18 he came less home and it took two years for my parents to get a divorce he wanted to leave us on the streets and during that time even stopped a card so we cant buy groceries or food. after the divorce he abandoned us completely and stopped all contact and got remarried to a woman who's daughter is the same age as i am. so it felt like complete abandonment and replacement at the same time. It still hurts to this day sometimes and sometimes have to forgive him over and over what he has done. ps I love all of your music and i can even relate to some of it 🌺 you are my new favorite arits keep up the amazing work Love from charmoné in South Africa 🌺
Thank you, Rory, for making this song. It did bring me to tears as I understand the feeling in it as my family kept hurting me mentally until the day I stepped away.
This.. just.... This. It resonates in my soul so fiercely. The silent pain and struggle to reconcile and come to terms. The painful realization you'll never get that apology and that to them it's just dust in the wind. The understanding that forgiveness doesn't mean it doesn't hurt. That forgiveness doesn't make it go away. But forgiving them helps you to heal. It hurts. Thank you for putting words to thoughts many of us cannot speak for ourselves
Just lost my dad tonight how ever.. darkness is turning to light! Gone through so much since before and after found your music and it has helped me through alot wheb i need and wanna thank You so so much for it and never stop reaching those who hurt and help more then you will know!! Keep the amazing music Rory!! Thank You
Thank you so much for your music. I'm pretty sure this isn't about this but it resonates as the daughter of an abusive narcissistic mother. The daughter in me just wants her mom, for mama to just call me and say sorry for everything she did so I can forgive her and have a hug. I want that hug almost as much as I want my next breath. But then I see my daughter and realize how easy it is to not hurt her, to not cut her with my words or bruise her with my hands. So I think I will always deal with that stupid little internal war of the daughter who just wants to forgive her mother and a mother who can't because abuse is a choice.
Thank you for sharing your pain with this world. Your words resonate deeply in my soul, and unfortunately, I understand this pain all too well. But we made it, survived, and are still here, living, healing, and helping others on their journey. You are a blessing. Thank you from my soul to yours. ❤
I don't know how to feel because I absolutely feel every word and your pain but at the same time I am totally obsessed with this song, I could honestly sing it everyday. Love you Rory and thank you for such a powerful song.
This song makes me cry every time. I'd give anything for my mom to apologize for the hell she put me and my sister through...Thank you for making such an amazing song
Oh my goodness! I already share your ADHD Love reels with EVERYONE I know with the tagline “these are my people” but now I even love your work more. 🥰 I had no idea that you were such an amazing singer and artist and this song hits me deep in my soul. Thank you for being you!
Just got all over goosebumps. This hits me harder than i want to admit. All i can do is THANK YOU ABSOLUTE THANK YOU for your bravery to write your lyrics to be who you are and stand firm in your words. In absolute tears. This song is every word i have ever felt. This is a song i wish i could send my parents and my siblings. But i am not there YET. saving it for sure though. Thank you
My sister and I are currently going through issues with our dad (again), and this dropped at the peak of it all. We also watched him struggle with addictions and it tore us apart. I love him so much, but he causes us so much pain. He’s never really apologized and that’s what hurts most. This has been playing on repeat since you posted it. Thank you for writing music that so many of us relate to. Thank you for helping me heal.
Holy FUCK… I came across this randomly on TH-cam shorts and I am so obsessed. God this is so incredibly relatable. You’re incredible. Thank you… I’m obsessed 🖤
You are sooo strong for singing about this! I have never thought about writing myself the apology, but maybe I should. Maybe I should also tell me parents they’re forgiven too. I hope you now feel love by your family you have now, you deserve it
I'm so glad I found this exactly when I needed to. ❤ My estranged sibling made contact with me and my mom for the first time in 6 years. Unfortunately it spiraled me and made me realize due to their mental health I will never receive an apology, but I forgave them a long time ago.
Love all your songs please make an album.Such meaningful songs which a lot of us can relate to.Thank you for sharing your talent and incredible voice.xx
This hit hard I've thought my mother was on my side when I was a child and experience sexual abuse and then right after I'd turn 18, going back to living with my mom. She was a narcissist and the case narrative I read and the things my family said what shes done was true. There so much more, but I've always ask my self if I'll ever get an apology and here we are ❤ ❤❤I love that you wrote this
![RØRY - ALTERNATIVE [lyric video]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/PJkehURJ-Y0/mqdefault.jpg)
![RØRY - ALTERNATIVE [lyric video]](/img/tr.png)
![Paris Paloma - labour [Official Video]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/jvU4xWsN7-A/mqdefault.jpg)
VERSE 1
I know its unexpected
Just give me a second
I need to sorry for the things I did to you
When you were younger
To you and your mother
If only I’d have know back then the damage it would do
PRE
I’ve watched you fight with addiction
and struggle with commitment
Couldn’t help but think of you as a
thorn in my side
Withdrew my affection to teach you a lesson
oh, what a waste of our time
CHORUS
But there’s no knock on my door
There’s no please can we talk
No sorry for all of the pain that I caused
We’re not sat in my kitchen
with quiet forgiveness
I thought you would find your way here but you didn’t
I’ll write myself the apology I’ll never receive
VERSE 2
Too young at eleven to learn of deception
Standing on the doorstep you were screaming out my name
The day I got married I know you were angry
But that’s a conversation I’m not brave enough to face
So I kept you at a distance
Watched you try to fix it
See the pain written on your face it reminds me of her
Its hard remember all our years together
And I hate that it hurts
CHORUS
But there’s no knock on my door
There’s no please can we talk
No sorry for all of the pain that I caused
We’re not sat in my kitchen
with quiet forgiveness
I thought you would find your way here but you didn’t
I’ll write myself the apology I’ll never receive
OUTRO
I can’t keep on waiting
For you to say sorry
All of the anger it’s poisoned body
If you you ever listen to this song I’ve written
I want you to know you’re already forgiven
Your music is absolutely other-wordly and so so so relatable.
This❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤ hit deep
Ahhh switch it to Father and you’ve nailed my life.
Holy cow!!! This almost describes how I found out about my biological father at 11 years old. And he never actually accepted me as his daughter in anyway; even to his death in Aug. 2020. I met him once at 18 yrs old. 😢
Sat here listening to this on repeat, bawling my eyes out for both parents I'll never hear apologies from. Great advice to write that apology myself. I'm still working through the pain, not quite ready for the forgiveness, but this song helps. Found you from your ADHD content, found your music and was amazed.
"I can't keep on waiting for you to say sorry, all of the anger it poisoned my body" just hits hard
Me too
so so hard...
Probably the realest line in The whole song.
Honestly this line did something to me
The end of this song breaks me. That moment you are done and your family rush in to comfort you. The most heartwarming thing ever xxx
as a daughter who has a narcissistic father this song hits hard and hits home because I will never get the apology from him!!! thank you for writing this song !!!!!
I understand this and know you are not alone.
We both want an apology, but will never get one.
I feel this. My mother is a narcissist. Has been my whole life. She's said sorry but I can tell it's crocodile tears. I'm 21tomorrow and she's still the same. One day I'll leave tho. And even tho it will break my inner child I have to do it. I'm gonna do it for myself.
@@elizabethhinklehinkle5393that's the thing its hard trust me. I'm 32 years old and I had to walk away from my dad when i was 29 years old. It broke my inner child but it's made me see that my dad isn't the father or could be the father I wanted from him. I hope you are okay and happy 21st birthday :) :)
@@Sophw32202
Thank you. I'm having a good birthday.😁 👍😎👍
My mom is the narcissist. I need to write myself the apology I won't receive. Tired of feeling worthless because the person who supposed to love me deemed it so.
Rory never misses. The start of her solo stuff started off super strong and continues to get even better. These super sad songs are the absolute best.
Thank you, really appreciate this x
Whqt band was she part of?
@@kathrynstewart8412 She used to feature vocals for a lot of EDM songs
@@its_r_o_r_ymasterpiece
This os the most healing song ive heard in forever. I first heard it on a day i knew my dad planned to talk to me and fully blame me for all of our problems again and demand i do various things to make up for it.
I am working on leaving and the moment i am gone, i look forward to being able to let go and forgive without havingbthe trauma continuously reintroduced into my life.
I am so grateful for my fiance who has sat beside me throughout my healing journey and i look forward to a future where we heal and grow together. ❤
Was not expecting to cry 40 seconds in but here we are. I jus wish this song was longer
Absolutely beautiful!! Thank you for writing and releasing this to help so many of us who are trying to heal from the toxic places we came from. Completely crying listening to this, Thank-you 💖
Thank you so much for the kindness, sending love to you xx
So we’ll written and definitively what I needed xx
@@its_r_o_r_y amazing voice
Exactly this. It’s like a tap straight to my heart and all these tears keep flooding out. ❤
This resonates with me so much. I hope he hearsthis
I found your music from watching your videos on ADHD and I am so glad I did. This song is so healing for me.
i couldn't possibly explain how much this song means to me. but as someone who's had to make my peace with the fact that i'll never get that apology from either of my abusive parents, i feel this song right down into my soul.
thank you. not just for writing this, but being brave enough to share your pain in your music. i know that's probably not easy, but you're helping more people than you could ever know
Me too, love. You're not alone! 💛 We have everything we need :)
I held it together pretty well up until the 1:50 mark...I literally felt that vocal pitch change in my fucking soul and could not stop crying afterwards. Beautiful lyrics, beautiful song, and a beautiful artist
This song has spurred more healing in me than anything any family member or even friend has caused. I’m bawling but it’s cathartic and I’m so grateful
when you become a parent, its like reliving all of that trauma again. but this time its different. its even more heartbreaking. thank you for this beautiful song. its already changed my world. thank you.
This stopped me dead last night. We may not need the same apology, but we certainly need a very similar one. Family tree finally helped me open up to the truth, and this new beautifully captivating song has opened the truth a little deeper. Your honesty has finally helped me start writing the book I've buried deep inside my pain for years.
Roxanne, I'm so sorry you feel pain so profound that it touches such deep pain within others.
You are incredibly brave. And beautiful and I thank you so so much.❤x
Cannot thank you enough for this. Started today crying because my dad doesn't text me back when I check on him or ever call to see how I'm doing. Growing up with two alcoholic and violently abusive parents was difficult. But what's most unbearable is being an adult now and still trying harder then they ever did to bring peace to our family. I see you and love it 🥰 you deserve an apology 💚 🤗
And so do you I understand the alcoholic abuse my mother did to me made me always try to be more for everyone and I never had a chance to talk about it to my mom she passed away on Thanksgiving alone and I was never going to be able to get a apology but you don't let your efforts make you feel less than your brighter and bolder and more precious then anyone who doesn't see your love
Those of us who have been neglected and abuse at the hands of the ones we loved and were supposed to be protected by try so fucking hard in our adult lives to give everyone we meet the love and support we never had no matter how much it hurts us in the end. We just don't want anyone to feel what we have or do feel. It hurts us at our core to see someone hurting so we are there for everyone like we hoped and prayed someone would be for us.......
I am so incredibly sorry to read this, and it resonates deeply. The scares run so incredibly deep don't they... It isn't your responsibility to heal a parent, or keep peace in your family. That belongs to the parents. You never to deserved to be put in that role. I hope you find your own peace, with your own chosen family, and begin to understand how loveable you you are, and that you don't have to "work" to be loved. xx
honestly, sometimes you've got to learn when to just let go.
and i say that as someone who spent the better part of my adulthood chasing after scraps of affection from my parents and having to mourn the fact that i'd never have the mom or dad that other people had.
but if you just keep pouring more and more of yourself into a relationship that's totally one sided, at a certain point, you have to ask yourself hard questions, like is it worth it. and if it's not, if you're getting nothing back except pain, then it might be time to let go. i know how hard it is, but i also know that i feel freer and lighter than ever, now that i've made my peace with being an emotional orphan.
because now i know it's not my fault. i tried. i did everything i could. i tried so hard to make them hear me. but i finally realized that my parents' failure to listen was tHEIR failure, not mine. i didn't deserve to be ignored, cast aside, or treated like i didn't matter. its what happened, but none of it was on ME. and realizing that helped me so much. it also helped me see that i deserved better. that i deserved to be getting what i was giving, because i'm WORTH the love and attention. and if they can't see that, then they're the ones missing out, not me
Girl (not to assume gender), you gotta give that shit up. You're wasting love, effort, and attention on people who do not deserve it in the least. That's like pouring liquid gold down into a dried up old well that hasn't worked in years. Save all that for people who will love you as much as you love them. Life is too short to waste that on abusive alkie low-lives.
Omg your family at the end 😢😢💔 So glad you finally found happiness with them. One of my absolute favourites because the saddest ones always are. Beautiful song and this video is perfect with Rich and your step daughter running in ❤❤ xxx
The end just broke me. I'm so happy you had your family on set with you
Words cannot describe how much i needed this to express how im feeling about my mother
I’ve watched your videos on adhd with your husband for years. Enjoyed the cute little skits. And always I see how loved you are in your hurt. I see a woman healing from everyone that hurt her through education of those who love her. I found out you have a musical career like 15 minutes ago, bought all the songs I could based on one snippet from Instagram. I’m not disappointed as this is the first song of yours I hear all the way through.
I will never receive an apology from my dad for all the trauma he has caused me and continues to cause me. Neither will my sister for her second hand and now first hand trauma. It’s so nice to feel that I’m not alone. I’ve been trying to follow your path of healing through education of my loved ones, but it’s not always easy and they don’t always listen or follow through.
I need to write all the apologies I will never be given. For her. For that little girl inside me that just wants to feel loved and worthwhile.
Thank you. So much. For everything you do. For sharing who you are with the world. In the least creepy way I can say it, we love you, Rory. And I hope to keep watching you grow and heal, leading the way for us to follow.
Your song saves my life alomst daily. Im barely hanging on but your voice and this song help me through the tears. Thank you for making this song. ❤
Robin hold on 🩵 new year is almost here. You didn’t deserve what happened to you and I am so so sorry. But there is hope of healing - sending love. I hope you have support 🙏🏼
Not me crying because I feel it so much. I will wait for my father to apologise in all eternity but I hope that I will be deep enough into recovery one day that I will be able to forgive him for everything he has done. Thank you so much for this song ❤️
I relate to this so much with my situation with my mother. I just went no contact with her almost 8 months ago and it still hurts so much. I know she’ll never apologize for all the pain she put me through and she’s painted me as the villain to everyone around her. This song is helping me heal 🖤
I’m in tears. I grew up in a very abusive home and my abuser to this day refuses to admit she even did anything wrong… keeping this trauma to myself is KILLING me. This song helped me release this pain. I love your music. Can’t wait till you’re a huge success and I can say I was here when you only had 20k subs 😂🎉🖤 you’re helping people with your music what an incredible accomplishment 🖤🥹
Rory, I will say it over and over, your voice, singing and your songs are on another level that every artist should look up to. You are simply amazing, you have a fan for life.
I have never had a song I connect with on such a deep level.
Thank you for for putting such deep emotions within your song and connecting with us in way I never thought possible ❤
I am blown away by how amazing this song is and her voice! I found her originally through the adhd reels on facebook. Damn. I wish you all the best.
This lady is out of the world..one of the best and biggest star I have ever heard...her voice is so beautiful ..it's goes so well with what she is singing all throughout...too young at 11 to learn about deception..so cool and beautiful
Real tears, real wounds and a real heartfelt hug at the end.
You get this all the time, but your music truly is something special that resonates deeply.
Thank you for sharing your pain, your heart and creating this beautiful song and hits so incredibly deep. I know I'm not the only one, but I NEEDED this song at this time in my life. My abusive father is dying. He was still so horrible during my last visit. The last several months I've been coming to terms with the fact that I'll never get an apology from him. I have to focus on healing myself regarding of what he does. Thank you ❤ And I'm so sorry, you deserve so much better.
I'm sorry that you're going through that, sounds to me like you deserve so much better too x
So nice to see at the end how loved and supported you are now 🥺🖤
ABSOLUTELY LOVE YOUR SONGS RORY... YOU DESERVE MORE NOTICE.. EVERY SONG YOU MAKE IS A MASTERPIECE
Honestly every song by Rory hits right to the soul for me.
So beautiful, the music, the beat, the lyrics, the backing track.. the voice... That voice.. so ethereal .. thank you xx
this song made me cry . WOW . I felt every single note of this. I don't know you but I feel proud of you. My dad was not an easy man, he caused pain and he passed a few years ago . I have been working on forgiving him and I think I am almost there, though the apology and all I needed from him I will not get . Your song has inspired me to write a poem giving myself the apology I won't receive. 🥰💚❤
I felt this.
It's heart-breaking to see so many comments with people feeling similar. I can't identify directly, but I wanted to let you know that it is not you, it is them, there is nothing you did wrong and it's their loss.
I don't connect to many songs, but I heard a small clip and came here to hear this in full.
Beautiful voice, and I really felt this song xx
Genius, this song might have just changed my life.
Have only just had the courage to listen to this song in full. I spent years in therapy not understanding why i just couldn't bring myself to let go of the anger and let it damage me so much. I needed that anger to get myself free. I needed it to get me where i needed to be. And now ive freed myself, and proved to myself that i can live out his worst fears... that i can survive without him; i can finally work on forgiveness. The space the anger and fear and loneliness lived is now full of love for my little one, and admiration for my partner, and determination to prove im the one to end the generational trauma
So brave of you to release all of that anger. I wish I was able to do so.
@@tlrsmom in all honesty I didn't even realise I'd released it until he tried to get back in touch and I sat back and looked at my little family and realised that he'd played a huge part in how I grew up and in my mental health and how I saw myself - but that was it. It wasn't the anger that was driving me anymore; it was love. Love for my partner who supported me through everything and love for my mum and my best friend and especially my little one. I didn't turn into who I'd dreamed of being, or who I was terrified of being, but the person I wished I'd had as a child. One day you'll get there I promise. You'll wake up and realise that you're free. In my mind it's not bravery or resilience, it's just finding peace after chaos. And i promise you, at some point you will find that peace too
Thank you Rory, for sharing your story in songs with us! I decided to make your beautiful music part of my healing journey.
I don't really have a connection to my dad who left when I was like 9. I guess I was "only" emotional neglected but man it still hurts. Last year I tried to talk to my dad about what he had done to me...but he couldn't/ wouldn't talk about it. Life is hard when you feel like you're not important (enough). Still struggle to this day to connect with others...
Your songs help a lot!! Finally someone who understands my feelings on a different level.
Wish you all the best!! ❤
WOW!! 😮😮😮 So glad you were hugged at the end!! Now I need one!! Lol! Very powerful indeed!!
That's what finally made me cry 🥲 All i have is my husband & new son, I'm No Contact with my entire family of origin. Definitely see myself reflected in the song but especially the last scene 😭 Sending you a big, comforting hug!! 🫂❤❤❤
Ahhh... you got me, RORY! I'm sold! Let me put you up as my new YT vocal mentor! I feel every vibe of each cord, every word, all the pain, all the sounds, and the whole story-I've been there for 30 years of my life! You are an amazing artist! I'm glad I discovered your music!!!!!! ADHD or NOT YOU ROCK!!!!! Thank you for being YOU!!!! x
Thank you so much from those of us who could never truly tell our parents how we really feel 😭😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️ its hard to feel this way
totally underrated artist. Love it! The World needs more of this
I just sat in my car and cried so hard. This song is absolutely touching my heart and I just let the emotions pour out as I felt them. Thank you so much for sharing your stories and your music with the world, you have such a HUGE impact and you are truly just a wonderful warrior soul that I admire ❤️🩹🤍🖤❤️🔥
the end where your family comes and hugs you brought me to tears
Gods it's literally the last line, always gets us crying.
This song hits right in the heart. thank you for the song
oh my god thank you for having your family come in and hug you because I spent the majority of this video thinking someone needs to give you a hug! Oh my god is this song emotional and you sing it so beautifully. Stay awesome
This song hits home so hard right now. I'm always a Rory fan but I needed this song right now and it's on repeat just to get me through the day ❤️
@@fionamenzies6737 sending love to you ♥️
watching it a second time and crying my eyes out again.
Got my own personal tragic story matching your lyrics so much.
I know from experience how things like that really feel and being almost 54 by now, I carry such things for so many many years and it does NOT heal the slightest bit.
I hope for you the music made it all better to cope n deal with it n to make it hurt less.
I felt this song in my soul 💕 2:55
Her voice !!!!❤❤❤❤
You know, as a teenager I’ve listened to music. As an adult I’m understanding it.
Guess I'm crying at work now. beautiful. 🥺♥️
My eyes are full of tears right now... Thank you Roxanne
And so my inner child started healing here❤
Floods of tears are flowing from my eyes - you’re speaking to every damaged and hurt child - I love you for this ❤
amazing as always! healing us all one song at a time
Honestly Rory has easily become one of my favourite artists, every song she puts out hits home. I really hope she goes on tour at some point because I cant wait to scream these lyrics from the crowd
Tickets are out for the tour ❤
@@vickigodby301 thank you for letting me know!! I'm unfortunately in Canada so I'll have to wait but I hope all of the UK fans have a blast!!!!
I found this song through tiktok a couple of months ago and i wanted to be the end of the song saying 'your are already forgiven" i am now at that point after losing my dad on June 26 2024. this has been my favorite song and a play it on repeat. I listened to it the last day I went to see him before he died after not seeing him for two years. this is my comfort song right now it says all that i can't.
@@lulusplayhouse9757 sending so much love. I am so so sorry for all of the pain that you went through, that was never ever yours to deal with. Losing him must have been so hard and confusing and I am so grateful you could find some comfort in this song.
I am very happy I found this, it was at the right time. I've been so angry at my parent's for things that I know now weren't their choice/things they wanted. I wont ever get those apologies, they have both passed. I'm now having to learn to let go of that anger and forgive them and myself. This really helps ❤.
I can't help but tear up when I hear this. I know our stories are different, but you're able to capture those feelings in an incredible way. Thank you for sharing your story.
Every time I watch this I am begging Rich to rush in and comfort you. I have shared this with so many people and every single one is able to identify with your songs.
Dear Rory thank you for writing and singing music like yours things that you've been through and how you've become stronger from your experiences the world needs more artists like you. I want to comment on this song that you've written i grew up in a house where there was abuse by my father , he always said how useless and pathetic we are and called us all sorts of names and he always yelled and never talked and he was physically abusive as well and voilent. He cheated on my mom on several occasions and by the time i was 18 he came less home and it took two years for my parents to get a divorce he wanted to leave us on the streets and during that time even stopped a card so we cant buy groceries or food. after the divorce he abandoned us completely and stopped all contact and got remarried to a woman who's daughter is the same age as i am. so it felt like complete abandonment and replacement at the same time. It still hurts to this day sometimes and sometimes have to forgive him over and over what he has done.
ps I love all of your music and i can even relate to some of it 🌺 you are my new favorite arits keep up the amazing work
Love from charmoné in South Africa 🌺
Thank you, Rory, for making this song. It did bring me to tears as I understand the feeling in it as my family kept hurting me mentally until the day I stepped away.
This.. just.... This. It resonates in my soul so fiercely. The silent pain and struggle to reconcile and come to terms. The painful realization you'll never get that apology and that to them it's just dust in the wind. The understanding that forgiveness doesn't mean it doesn't hurt. That forgiveness doesn't make it go away. But forgiving them helps you to heal. It hurts. Thank you for putting words to thoughts many of us cannot speak for ourselves
I cried and then sent this video to my daughter. The pain her father caused breaks my heart
Just lost my dad tonight how ever.. darkness is turning to light!
Gone through so much since before and after found your music and it has helped me through alot wheb i need and wanna thank You so so much for it and never stop reaching those who hurt and help more then you will know!! Keep the amazing music Rory!! Thank You
When someone would ask me what song I currently relate to the most and I cry every time when hearing.
It is this one
Thank you so much for your music. I'm pretty sure this isn't about this but it resonates as the daughter of an abusive narcissistic mother. The daughter in me just wants her mom, for mama to just call me and say sorry for everything she did so I can forgive her and have a hug. I want that hug almost as much as I want my next breath. But then I see my daughter and realize how easy it is to not hurt her, to not cut her with my words or bruise her with my hands. So I think I will always deal with that stupid little internal war of the daughter who just wants to forgive her mother and a mother who can't because abuse is a choice.
Thank you for sharing your pain with this world. Your words resonate deeply in my soul, and unfortunately, I understand this pain all too well. But we made it, survived, and are still here, living, healing, and helping others on their journey. You are a blessing. Thank you from my soul to yours. ❤
I don't know how to feel because I absolutely feel every word and your pain but at the same time I am totally obsessed with this song, I could honestly sing it everyday. Love you Rory and thank you for such a powerful song.
This song makes me cry every time. I'd give anything for my mom to apologize for the hell she put me and my sister through...Thank you for making such an amazing song
fantastic song, I love how RØRY's vocals are so insane, they fit across so many genres (progressive house, rock, ballads), can't wait for more!
But the part where Rich and the little one come in hot with the dopamine hit at the end sent me sobbing... omg.
This is helping the awful break up I’m going through right now . Word for word.
Oh my goodness! I already share your ADHD Love reels with EVERYONE I know with the tagline “these are my people” but now I even love your work more. 🥰
I had no idea that you were such an amazing singer and artist and this song hits me deep in my soul. Thank you for being you!
what a beautiful and heartfelt song. It made me think of old family wounds.
You are extremely brave and talented!
Just got all over goosebumps.
This hits me harder than i want to admit. All i can do is THANK YOU ABSOLUTE THANK YOU for your bravery to write your lyrics to be who you are and stand firm in your words.
In absolute tears. This song is every word i have ever felt. This is a song i wish i could send my parents and my siblings. But i am not there YET. saving it for sure though.
Thank you
....Are you ok? You seem to have regressed into an infant.
Awesome tune...Those emotions!! 😢 Love it! ❤️❤️
This is so personal to you and so many of us, thank you. Music is healing
My sister and I are currently going through issues with our dad (again), and this dropped at the peak of it all. We also watched him struggle with addictions and it tore us apart. I love him so much, but he causes us so much pain. He’s never really apologized and that’s what hurts most. This has been playing on repeat since you posted it. Thank you for writing music that so many of us relate to. Thank you for helping me heal.
Holy FUCK… I came across this randomly on TH-cam shorts and I am so obsessed. God this is so incredibly relatable. You’re incredible. Thank you… I’m obsessed 🖤
Thank you so much 🩵 really happy you found the music x
You are sooo strong for singing about this! I have never thought about writing myself the apology, but maybe I should. Maybe I should also tell me parents they’re forgiven too. I hope you now feel love by your family you have now, you deserve it
Beautiful delivery Rory
It’s stunning
And I hate that it hurts vocal part is magical
Rory your songs are just so amazing! Every one has made me cry, but not out of sadness, just the fact someone else UNDERSTANDS ❤❤❤
That voice man is absolutely unreal gets ye in the feels every time
This song!! Gawd it hits the feelers so hard, you are so amazing girl!!
I'm so glad I found this exactly when I needed to. ❤
My estranged sibling made contact with me and my mom for the first time in 6 years. Unfortunately it spiraled me and made me realize due to their mental health I will never receive an apology, but I forgave them a long time ago.
This song has spoken to me in ways no other song has. It’s truly helped heal me from the toxic relationship with my mother.
I wasn’t expecting to cry less than a minute in, literally spoke words about how I’ve felt
Love all your songs please make an album.Such meaningful songs which a lot of us can relate to.Thank you for sharing your talent and incredible voice.xx
I love it!!
This song was emotionally satisfying.. It gave me heartbreak, strength, acceptance then finally closure.
Wow I'm crying. This is beautiful and tragic. Great job, Rox.
I know I'm not the only one bawling my eyes out...
Wow. Full body and soul chills. Thank you 💖
This hit hard I've thought my mother was on my side when I was a child and experience sexual abuse and then right after I'd turn 18, going back to living with my mom. She was a narcissist and the case narrative I read and the things my family said what shes done was true. There so much more, but I've always ask my self if I'll ever get an apology and here we are ❤ ❤❤I love that you wrote this
This song and video are so powerful and healing. Thank you, you are amazing
If only knew how your speaking the exact words for many! Without us having to say a word we just put this on and we are in symphony with you!