@@DanaAndersen one such occassion was whilst at work during the height of covid. I work in retail and a woman came in with a t-shirt saying "I support key workers". We were chatting normally through my till and I asked what she did as a job. She said she works with special needs children. I said that was really cool and that I myself am autistic. She then changed and started speaking to me like a child and said something along the lines of "I bet you're really good at video games as well. They always say autistic folk can always get to the top level" (whatever that even is 🤣)
Cross-cultural comparisons are certainly important. The vast majority of videos British viewers see are of British or American autists. A few appear from European sources but they are almost always from highly-educated English-speaking Europeans who aren't typical of the wider population. Some cultures may be more autism-friendly but on the whole all cultures value neurotypical traits. It can be hardest of all for autists in developing societies where there is usually far less awareness of autism, little access to diagnosis and sometimes even greater stigma about it.
@@DanaAndersen Making a video and appearing on screen is vastly harder than making comments. I wouldn't have the courage to appear on screen or even use my real name on comments. Anybody who makes videos and puts their ideas and work out there is doing something remarkable. We all have to be thankful to creators like yourself as they provide us with so much to engage with. Your videos are always great to see whether they are on autism or on interests such as TV or fashion and I hope there will be many more and many more subscribers to your channel!
I haven't met many Asian people (saw quite a few at University) but in general they seem very reserved and fitting in is far important there than in Britain or Europe. To be blunt, if you don't fit in you are basically an outcast to the point where finding other people to meet is almost impossible (like an untouchable), from the outside looking in, in Japan it looks like everyone has to actually be the same, you are not allowed to stand out at all. There is a lot of social pressure to stay in your place as such. They also seem very socially rigid and conservative to me, as other videos I watched on Japan's society mentioned that mental health is a bit of a forbidden topic (like it somehow brings shame or something) which explains other issues that they have like Hikikomori (literally staying in your room for years or even decades!), issues of overworking (the Japanese actually have a specific word for 'death from overworking') and of course the suicide problem. Masking is enough of a toll for autistics anyway but think if you could not be open to anyone, it's not so suprising they have such social problems. I watched this particular video a while back but you're right somethings are very similar to here. I think overall, Japan is socially about 30 to 50 years behind us with understanding of mental health and neurodiversity though, but still a good ways to go here too. I hope the sooner we see people as just people, rather than something to profit/ exploit than most of the stigma will go away. It's not easy being autistic but to me alot of what makes it hard is the environment around us and how people treat us, not sure if it's just me that thinks that. Interesting to see your opinions as usual though. Also I can't do small talk either lol.
You mentioned about "small talk" and I also hate it. The weather stuff I don't mind so much because we are all affected by it but it's all the more personal questions, e.g. "how are you?" "how was your weekend / holiday?", even "what did you have for your tea?" and of course being expected to reciprocate by asking similar questions back. I'd always rather discuss issues or interests or the task or activity we're doing. Social niceties such as saying hello, goodbye, acknowledging people, please and thank you are all good manners and fine but so much of the small talk is pointless and no-one ever listens to or responds to the answers anyway.
It's good when someone subverts the small talk questions. In an episode of One Foot in the Grave Victor Meldrew was asked "how was your holiday?" and snapped back honestly "terrible!" I was once asked "did you have a good break" and just replied honestly and to the point "no". I wish people wouldn't ask such questions unless they know the person well and really went to know about their holiday, etc.
You mentioned about people asking an autistic person if they can work out dates and days of the week and this is actually something I can do. It is of course a largely useless "skill" and has its drawbacks as when I come across a date I always work out the day of the week whether I need to or not. It also means that all the calendar patterns have a significance for me which gets wrapped-up with my superstitions and bad memories so they remind me of bad experiences in particular years, etc. Sometimes an ability can be a hindrance as well as a help.
It's a super interesting thing to be able to do, though as you note it can have its drawbacks. The drawback for me is the disappointment from others that I can't, or even that I'm not really autistic because I can't do it. The NT's will realise we're all different eventually 😂
@@DanaAndersen Unfortunately the "Rain Man" stereotype is still very common, alongside the stereotype that autists are all maths, science and computing geniuses or "geeks". The problem is that the majority of autists who are not any of those things can struggle to be accepted.
TBH, I don't know why you repeatedly say you're not educated, because what you do in this video is frankly impressive: nuanced, insightful, balanced, sceptical, self-aware... I'm a translator and was particularly impressed by how you immediately saw the danger of over-interpreting the subtitles. Most people are oblivious to this. Once I sat in a philosophy seminar where the speaker was doing a close reading of a French text - in English translation - parsing every word and expecting to reach sound conclusions. 🤷🏼♀ So much for education... What I find soothing about Japan is that there's a lot of formality - structured entrances and exits to conversations and interactions that make them much easier to deal with. Plus there is a general social tendency to obsess over minute details. No doubt it can be a difficult place to grow up, but to visit as a foreigner or tourist, it's pretty great.
13:40 I've had people change how they were talking to me mid conversation because I told them I am autistic 😅
Unfortunately an experience most of us have had I think!
@@DanaAndersen one such occassion was whilst at work during the height of covid. I work in retail and a woman came in with a t-shirt saying "I support key workers". We were chatting normally through my till and I asked what she did as a job. She said she works with special needs children. I said that was really cool and that I myself am autistic. She then changed and started speaking to me like a child and said something along the lines of "I bet you're really good at video games as well. They always say autistic folk can always get to the top level" (whatever that even is 🤣)
Cross-cultural comparisons are certainly important. The vast majority of videos British viewers see are of British or American autists. A few appear from European sources but they are almost always from highly-educated English-speaking Europeans who aren't typical of the wider population. Some cultures may be more autism-friendly but on the whole all cultures value neurotypical traits. It can be hardest of all for autists in developing societies where there is usually far less awareness of autism, little access to diagnosis and sometimes even greater stigma about it.
Very well said! I'm sure you make better points in the comments than I do in the videos you're commenting on 😂
@@DanaAndersen Making a video and appearing on screen is vastly harder than making comments. I wouldn't have the courage to appear on screen or even use my real name on comments. Anybody who makes videos and puts their ideas and work out there is doing something remarkable. We all have to be thankful to creators like yourself as they provide us with so much to engage with. Your videos are always great to see whether they are on autism or on interests such as TV or fashion and I hope there will be many more and many more subscribers to your channel!
I haven't met many Asian people (saw quite a few at University) but in general they seem very reserved and fitting in is far important there than in Britain or Europe. To be blunt, if you don't fit in you are basically an outcast to the point where finding other people to meet is almost impossible (like an untouchable), from the outside looking in, in Japan it looks like everyone has to actually be the same, you are not allowed to stand out at all. There is a lot of social pressure to stay in your place as such. They also seem very socially rigid and conservative to me, as other videos I watched on Japan's society mentioned that mental health is a bit of a forbidden topic (like it somehow brings shame or something) which explains other issues that they have like Hikikomori (literally staying in your room for years or even decades!), issues of overworking (the Japanese actually have a specific word for 'death from overworking') and of course the suicide problem.
Masking is enough of a toll for autistics anyway but think if you could not be open to anyone, it's not so suprising they have such social problems. I watched this particular video a while back but you're right somethings are very similar to here. I think overall, Japan is socially about 30 to 50 years behind us with understanding of mental health and neurodiversity though, but still a good ways to go here too. I hope the sooner we see people as just people, rather than something to profit/ exploit than most of the stigma will go away. It's not easy being autistic but to me alot of what makes it hard is the environment around us and how people treat us, not sure if it's just me that thinks that. Interesting to see your opinions as usual though.
Also I can't do small talk either lol.
You mentioned about "small talk" and I also hate it. The weather stuff I don't mind so much because we are all affected by it but it's all the more personal questions, e.g. "how are you?" "how was your weekend / holiday?", even "what did you have for your tea?" and of course being expected to reciprocate by asking similar questions back. I'd always rather discuss issues or interests or the task or activity we're doing. Social niceties such as saying hello, goodbye, acknowledging people, please and thank you are all good manners and fine but so much of the small talk is pointless and no-one ever listens to or responds to the answers anyway.
It's good when someone subverts the small talk questions. In an episode of One Foot in the Grave Victor Meldrew was asked "how was your holiday?" and snapped back honestly "terrible!" I was once asked "did you have a good break" and just replied honestly and to the point "no". I wish people wouldn't ask such questions unless they know the person well and really went to know about their holiday, etc.
7:49 that’s my take from learning about autism as well, humans are just humans, it’s got nothing to do with race or culture even.
We all have lots of differences and things that make us unique, but at the very base of it we’re definitely all the same really!
You mentioned about people asking an autistic person if they can work out dates and days of the week and this is actually something I can do. It is of course a largely useless "skill" and has its drawbacks as when I come across a date I always work out the day of the week whether I need to or not. It also means that all the calendar patterns have a significance for me which gets wrapped-up with my superstitions and bad memories so they remind me of bad experiences in particular years, etc. Sometimes an ability can be a hindrance as well as a help.
It's a super interesting thing to be able to do, though as you note it can have its drawbacks. The drawback for me is the disappointment from others that I can't, or even that I'm not really autistic because I can't do it. The NT's will realise we're all different eventually 😂
@@DanaAndersen Unfortunately the "Rain Man" stereotype is still very common, alongside the stereotype that autists are all maths, science and computing geniuses or "geeks". The problem is that the majority of autists who are not any of those things can struggle to be accepted.
TBH, I don't know why you repeatedly say you're not educated, because what you do in this video is frankly impressive: nuanced, insightful, balanced, sceptical, self-aware...
I'm a translator and was particularly impressed by how you immediately saw the danger of over-interpreting the subtitles. Most people are oblivious to this. Once I sat in a philosophy seminar where the speaker was doing a close reading of a French text - in English translation - parsing every word and expecting to reach sound conclusions. 🤷🏼♀ So much for education...
What I find soothing about Japan is that there's a lot of formality - structured entrances and exits to conversations and interactions that make them much easier to deal with. Plus there is a general social tendency to obsess over minute details. No doubt it can be a difficult place to grow up, but to visit as a foreigner or tourist, it's pretty great.
Your the best 😊