Great advice, but I was hoping to hear about how to deal with docs who are rude in general without you doing something wrong (ex: calling about an order). I also think that it is unacceptable to allow bullying or humiliation in the workplace even if the nurse is at fault.. I'm sure that the doctor in the letter treats other people that way and that is something that needs to be addressed because there is no excuse for that type of behavior.
Honey, she is right. Just own a mistake and move on, but that was such an A$$ move and so unprofessional for him to scold you in front of others. One thing I have taken away from the military: "Praise in public. Discipline in private."
+Katherine Thompson Hi Katherine!! Thanks so much for sharing that!! I heard that phrase before & love it :) Looking forward to seeing you on here again soon!! xoxo - Caroline
I don't mind admitting my errors. I only give respect when you earn respect✊ . I am diplomatic but If I don't stand for nothing then I will fall for everything! I sometimes put my foot in my mouth 👄,but at the end of the day I am proud of who I am!
What is it that allows doctors to be verbally abusive? It is bullying on a grand scale. These days in the highly competitive world of medicine and those who wish to become doctors, they really should find only those with good communication skills period. I am watching this as a patient who was treated with disregard and insensitivity and this doctor made me feel like I was trash. He obviously didn't like me or was having a bad day. It is inexcusable really. Clearly he went into medicine for money or status or to make his parents happy, not because he truly wanted to help people. I can only imagine how horrendous it must be for nurses. I think your tips are spot on and make a lot of sense. I am trying like you said not to keep reliving the experience with that doctor because it makes me madder and madder.
I, also a patient, had a horrible experience (physical abuse and then libel in my medical records by an on call Neurologist) 2 years ago and the entire system backed up the rogue doctor afterwards. This mental technique works if the incident is an isolated incident, but I'd say that even for a nurse, if some doctor really has it in for you then it would be better to look for another job as soon as possible, because often it means administration condones this type of behavior. I think this kind of thing is way too socially accepted in our society, but there are workplaces that have good management and do not sit by and condone abusive behavior by Prima Donna doctors who think they're above the law.
Some great comments. Bottom line for physicians: it is never o.k. to berate another medical professional. Period. Nurses, you need to use your facilities' reporting system to alert administration to this behavior as it promotes an adversarial atmosphere that does nothing to help the patients.
Tammy W. the patient's life and the doctors license is on the line and you think he/she should not reprimand you. Millennials need to put on their big girl/pants and get a thicker skin.
I rarely post comments on videos. I wanted to comment because I am so very impressed by your videos. I have watched a few of them. I worked as a firefighter for most of my career then after my son was born I went back to school to become a nurse. Nursing is the most challenging and rewarding job I have ever done. There is so much to learn in nursing. I am still new and learning. There are many days I think, was I crazy to do this. But there is also so much I love about the job. Your videos not only give great advice but you are also supportive. You are a great resource for all of us new nurses out there who are learning and dealing with the bumps in the road to get to being an experienced nurse. Thank you very much!!
"Each problem solved became a rule which served afterwards to solve other problems." - I know it's not a quote necessarily about mistakes, but it is one of my favorite quotes about learning from experiences :) Love your videos! Please continue to make more, they're so beneficial for me going into the nursing program at my school.
I absolutely LOVE your advice! I think the surgeon scolding her in front of everyone was maybe his way of making sure she realize how important medication mistakes can be. Luckily, this mistake was not life threatening, but what if it had been? Just use it as a learning experience and thank God nothing bad came of it and you can still practice as an RN! :)
Hi Corey, I totally understand! However, is it possible that sometimes the situation is one that could be perceived differently? Not all battles are worth fighting... However a peaceful approach, will always transform you into a better person. Much Love, - Caroline
I really like your positive approach but it seems a bit passive. Many times physicians and other providers are just having a bad day and don't realize how they are acting. A reminder that they are being unprofessional usually does the trick. If this is a chronic problem, these interactions should be reported through the proper institutional channel. Many institutions have policies against workplace bullying (also called lateral violence or horizontal violence).
Aaron Saxton Thanks for sharing Aaron, Definitely important to examine each situation individually :) Looking forward to hearing from you again soon! Much Love, - Caroline
I think this is a great way to deal with negative thoughts over a bad experience at work! If you try to explain yourself, it only looks like an excuse. And you are right, we don't need to constantly talk about it to others, it only enhances the negativity of the situation. It is best to just fix what can be fixed and learn from it, being thankful that it wasn't life threatening. Don't allow yourself to wallow in humiliation, but be aware of your shortcomings so that you can improve them!
It's helpful to talk about things that have upset you. This is not relieving it, it's getting some clarification and finding a better solution to the problem from another view. Otherwise, you can imagine all sorts of things for days and days.
I love your videos! I just had a difficult day with a doctor and on my way home I found myself getting really down and being super hard on myself. This video was the perfect end to my night and definitely made me rethink the situation and realize that this is a learning experience! Thank you :)
Jessica Angelone Hi Jessica!!I'm so glad to hear that :) It does not excuse inappropriate behavior... However, we can choose the meaning that we give the situation :) Thanks so much for the comment!! See you on here again soon I hope!! xoxo - Caroline
I was really hoping that after accepting and owning your mistakes, you’d give advice about professional ways to stand up for yourself. Even if it was your fault, it’s not ok to be scolded in front of peers and patients.
How do you deal with a rude patient or a worrisome patient. I know and understand that 9/10 or even 10/10, that the reason why a patients behaves the way they do is because they are sick and maybe anxious. So that is when I try to be as empathetic as possible. However, sometimes I just get the feeling that they want to push buttons.
Wendy Pineda Hi Wendy! There will always be people around to push your buttons. I look at them as "life trainers" kind of like: "I need to learn how to effectively deal with this type of person in order to become the person I am destined to become." I also just try to do what they are asking me to do (hopefully I can) fast & stay away as much as possible until they calm down. I find that many times if someone is complaining of pain, for example... and for some reason or the other there is a delay... the best thing for me to do is to give it to them.... Then check back later when their pain is better and do my best to treat them as if nothing ever happened :) I hope this helps!! xoxo - Caroline
Wendy Pineda that is so true. Trust me I have had six major surgeries in my life. 3 brain surgeries and 3 leg surgeries for spasticity in my legs. I also have hydrocephalus. So I deal with a lot of headaches. I am also dealing with lot of abdominal pain and leg pain and chronic body pain everyday which doctors are not able to figure out. I do not like hospitals, doctors, or needle procedures. I have been through a lot of blood draws, ivs, scans that require iv contrasts, and other needle procedures. I cry and tense up and shake. I think medical professionals need to understand this and not be curt and rude to their patients and what they are going through. There is a lack of empathy. It does not matter how much knowledge is gained through medical school or nursing school. This is something that I feel cannot be taught. It has to come from within the individual. I am lucky that I have had really caring surgeons who did my surgeries.
Debi Tyler Ok Debi! It will be waiting here for you forever!!!! :D Thank you for letting me know that you liked it! Hope to see you on here again soon! xoxo! - Caroline
This is so good. I've had experiences with mistakes and being a perfectionist (which I don't think is really healthy), it just broke me down. Reliving the situation and trying to associate it with a good memory is a great idea.
Amazing thank you really helps because we all will experience this as nurse and in life we are not perfect so we will make mistakes it's about honesty admitting what we have done and how we can improve for next time so long you have the passion to be a good nurse you will overcome these hiccups stay blessed prayer for me is vital and without god I do not how I would survive thanks Caroline love you x
So nice to see you again Krystal!! So glad you found it helpful!! Thanks so much for the comment!! Cannot wait to see you again soon!! Love you!! - Caroline
Wow this video is very inspiring. I literally paused the video to rethink about such a memory I had, and I'm feeling a great change. I must say you give the best advice that anyone can relate to. Thank you.
Always check the chart after getting report. Nurses can be tired and overworked too and they might mistake a patient for another. We hope this never happens, but that’s why we double, triple check. I don’t play with Doctors’ orders, a pt’s life depends on it. And she is right, don’t talk about the issues with co-workers, bring it up to the director or nurse manager instead. Address it privately to avoid this happening again.
What a great way to turn a negative experience into a positive one, and also a great time to learn and grow. This will help me now and in the future. Thanks so much for sharing, I think your page is wonderful, I'm going to show all of my nursing school friends your page because I think it's so helpful and full of wonderful ideas.
Im a family caregiver and I am dealing with a VERY rude colorectal surgeon for my father’s hemorrhoid surgery. I have called 3 times over the past 4 days because my father has experienced diarrhea following the post op instruction of 3 stool softners a day and also he had 103F post op. He’s fine now, but everytime I called this doctor for instruction which the post op paperworl says call him if we experience any of these symptoms and he sounds pissed and speaks to me in such a condescending manner. So first I dont feel so bad being targeted seeing as a lot of surgeons seem to have a shitty attitude even to their staff nurses who handle the aftermath of every procedure. So what advice would you give if the doctor is unbelievably rude and condescending to a patient? I’ve thought about waiting until my father’s healed and leaving a scathing review but I honestly want to forget he exists after this experience instead and give him no more time or energy. What could I do in the future though if I ever run into this again? Any thoughts?
I agree. We really have to be sharper in our actions as RNs and that comes with experience. Be more forgiving of yourself. And always think for the patient's safety in all of your nursing decisions and actions, eventhough it is ordered. Have fun being an RN! :)
I still remember getting yelled at on the phone by an md for being on hold while I finished up in a cpr situation. How dare I leave them waiting, Im sorry the person who picked up the call did not check back with the call on hold. How can I help you.
This is great advice for any kind of difficult time others have in their daily lives! I am starting cosmetology school which in no way can compare to what you do or had to do while attending school but attending school full time and working full time is something i've never done. Seeing how graceful you react to a situation like this is definitely helpful. I will apply this to my daily life. Can you make a video on tips for eating on a busy day? I want to be as healthy as possible while I have 5 long days which seems difficult with little time in the day. What do you do when you go to work for a good meal?
Thanks you for this video! Watching all of your videos makes me so excited to become a nurse! I am so excited to start this amazing journey..thank you for everything you do and all of your advice! xoxo
Stephanie Cianciolo Hi Stephanie! So glad to hear that you have found the videos to be helpful! It really is my pleasure to make them! I love nursing & I think we have to potential to have a super awesome life as a nurse... so I love vlogging about it! My email address is Caroline@EmpoweRN.com! Talk to you soon! xoxo
From my 61 yrs of life experience with doctors, and I have met tons of them and I have to say less than 10% of them have good bedside manners and kindness!! The rest are egomaniacs and rude and obnoxious.
Ma'am, i am absolutely in love with your channel. I do have a request, though, unless you already have a video about this topic: Would you consider making a video about "How to Deal with Rude/Agressive Nurses," please? As a frequent patient, I've met very kindhearted nurses over the past 6yrs, but i simply haven't the heart to "report" the ones who would tell me to "shut up" while I gagged & whimpered in pain, all the while I was sharing a room with 4 other patients, all older than myself. (Ranging 45-70+).. Or when people labeled with the tags "RN" decide to make a mockery of my handful of diagnoses' and claim things like, "Someone with lupper and lower quartile spasms wouldn't be confortable laying that way." (Curled into the fetal position loosely, trying to relax the muscles on at least one side of my body) or, "We can't help you. There's nothing we can do for you. You came here because of your own decision, so you need to learn to control your pain." After a paramedic or doctor had saved* a dose of muscle relaxants for me, since i had veen coping well enough during transport, despite the feeling of my ribs opening up like wings. *I live in Canada; Apparently EMTs can use 1 dose on the patient while in transport, unless unneeded, or specified via phone call to the hospital & to be used before a doctor is able to reach the patient, if the he or she is very busy that day.) These situations have happened quite a lot over the past 6yrs, and they bring distress not only to my own coping skills and esteem, but to my partner, my parents, my sister and niece-- we all do not know what to do about these actions, albeit encouragement from other family members to file a report, and ourselves worrying that other patients with chronic illnesses will experience the same emotional distress. We would all feel terrible seeing someone lose so much of their life's efforts simply because of my conditions; there must be something we are not seeing here, and i feel that you would be able to answer this question very well for us all.
that is very stressful to be on a situation like that.i remembered when i was a student and on duty to be a scrub nurse on operation.i met an old doctor who would do nothing but to embarrass everyone in front of a patient.because of my nervousness i hand him a wrong instrument that made him throw it away.jeez!what i did that time to lessen the burden of stress is i bit my lips hard as i can, switch off my sensitive meter, and see the funny side of it as i secretely smiled to myself.good thing im wearing a face mask to hide my evil smirk on my face.
Awe Yay!!! So glad that you liked it :) I love putting good thoughts in my head... so I though you guys might like it too! So nice to see you on here again!! I'm working on your video... you requested on another comment... look out for it ;) xoxo
Yes you have to be positive with them and then a nurse for 25 years. I’ve tried explaining myself and it only makes you look like you’re trying to make “excuses” trust me it’s best to handle it exactly as you said it’s not being passive it’s just being realistic. Because one bottom line comes down to it you can write the nurse up or send an email to the manager explaining that she did not give you a proper report and explain your situation to your unit manager so they can talk to the nurse I don’t care how long she’s been a nurse people make mistakes.
Youre videos are great & anyone who puts a thumbs down serisouly does not know how to accept their flaws and how to be responsible for their actions. You need to teach after years of nursing!
My first tactic is to try changing doctors. Bad receptionists will also cause me to switch doctors! I don't have a very good opinion of the way allopathy is conducted or practiced in this country (USA) anyway.
i agree that you should own up to the mistake. but before you move on, pull that doctor to the side and informed him, "the mistake i made today won't happen again. (this is where you smile and even giggle saying) thank you for informing me of your disappointment, but next time don't scold me like i am a child and especially in front of everyone, just to make your point. all you had to say was what you wanted in a respectful manner, okay! I'm going to have to write up an incident report, because that's not how you treat people and so, this also doesn't happen again. Have a good day." then you move on. just because you're a doctor doesn't give you the right to treat people that way.
I went to a doctor to get some help with deal ing with the pain from Lupus and give me injections to help with it. The first visit before any test he ran came back, He started giving me injections in my back. the second visit all he was worry about is my fat and saying I was fat and need to lose 50 pounds and give me some diet pills that has bad side effects that would add on to my pain levels. Look I know I was overweight and I take 4 insulin shots per day and that makes me gain weight. But he was rude and was pissed off by someone else before I saw him, but I was in his line of fire and he was mean to me. on kindly matter to other feels and simply not knowing to understand his problems and move on with it in the other person who took the blows. I know I'm fat and I've tried so many times to lose it. This doctor was to manage my pain and give me injections, instead I got a pain in a ass that tries to push other medicine instead the ones I need the most.
I was anxious on my first gyn onc physician visit who has an excellent reputation. I had a huge pelvic mass arising reproductive structures and hernia. I’m petite, age 68, a former dancer, weight 103, former height 5’2” to now 5ft. Due to this tumor I went down to 81lbs. After introductions he told me I looked like an emaciated African in front of his 5 assistants. I was rather shocked, felt I was shamed and hurt. I held my tongue as I looked at his staff then replied, “I do”? , rather then confronting him in front of his assistants. There was a quiet pause when I stated I was scared. His response was he was scared! I again felt rather shocked replied, “your scared, oh my God” I was not only intimidated by this well respected surgeon but I had to trust this surgeon with my life who not only insulted me but is telling me that he is scared. I was then rushed to sign papers as the nurse spoke so rapidly explaining medical details of surgery scheduled in 3 days. I told her I’m 68, anxious to slow down as I can’t grasp medical terminology. I was shaking from fear, freezing cold office and dressed lightly with no sleeves being quite hot outside in FL. This was a horrible experience as I also have trauma grief from loss of my daughter which was noted in medical documentations. I was then told to go to their one stop labs, X-rays, cardio, and labs still trembling, freezing and exhausted 3 hrs later. The surgeon also suspected low grade cancer. I proceeded with surgery as I felt was urgent. I’m grateful this huge tumor was removed , benign, with surgical laparotomy, total abdominal hysterectomy, bilateral salpingo oophorectomy and umbilical hernia resection. I still am disturbed as to why I was treated so harshly as this very experienced surgeon had to know I was suffering, unable to eat, digest, along with bowel obstruction to be humiliated as I undeservedly was. Does anyone have a sensible explanation because I don’t want this to ever happen to any of my sisters.
Hi Annellese! It is so nice to hear from you!! I do have a video that explains how I deal with stress & bullying.. I will post the link below :) I really hope you like it!! Let me know if you would like to see a different type of video!! Looking forward to hearing from you soon!!! Much Love, - Caroline Link: th-cam.com/video/69qePTsC1MY/w-d-xo.html
Very great advice! However, I do miss a tiny bit of info I'd wish to get out of this video.. Is there any way to respectfully "not take it" Like when a doctor is being rude to you which results in you compromising patient care because you're afraid to be embaressed again since that doctor can have poor communication skills (like the one of the email you got, scolding in front of other colleagues) how do you set boundaries?
Hi Linus! Really nice to hear from you! I personally have not... I just have a lot of other goals that I feel are my calling.. But you know, if that is your dream... go for it! I know a lot of Doctors who started out as nurses :) I hope this helps!! Looking forward tot hearing from you again soon! Much Love, - Caroline
Thanks. Another question. I usually take a lot of feedback as constructive criticism. Recently while starting, I find that I have been overly criticised on everything by a few of the senior nurses almost to the point where I feel quite useless. This only happens from a few of the nurses, others have been really positive and supportive. It seems to really lower my self-esteem.What can I do ? Cheers
If you've ever taken the Meyers Briggs personality test? I am infj. I always assumed because of my personality, i would never make a good nurse. What's your personality type?
+Janette Blanco I'm an ISFJ. I assumed I never could be a nurse for reasons including the huge responsibility and math skills etc, but I'm now an RN in my first year of practice! Through nursing school I have learned that nursing is a HUGE field, and there are so many different options including working directly with patients in the hospital in a variety of settings (ICU, Emerg, palliative, surgical, medicine, pediatrics, obstetrics, geriatrics, psyche...) to home support to education (for other nurses and the public) to managerial office based roles. What sold me on nursing was my nurse friend angrily talking about someone not being cleaned up properly and realizing, 'I could do that.' There are bad days when I'm completely overwhelmed and need a good cry, but then there are those good days and moments when you get to be there for a pt &/or their family & know exactly why you're a nurse :)
Can I ask you caroline. What is a nursing teaching plan. Do you as an RN staff nurse have to make them. Is the teaching plan like or apart of the persons care plan.
I do not know what a teaching plan is. I hear it could be used for discharging a patient. I thought a teaching plan is for like a nurse educator educating a bunch of people. An example a Nurse teaching a bunch of moms how to breast feed their babies after delivering. I thought that would require a teaching plan. Do you make teaching plans caroline
How do patients deal with rude doctors sometimes I'm sorry I think they purposely misdiagnosing because they judge people I've had this happen at our local urgent cares and there's not much to choose from in my city sometimes you'll get the same doctor and it's like oh no I don't want this doctor cuz he doesn't listen or she doesn't listen and they call you liars and then you end up in the ER the ER will hear what that doctor didn't hear it's like they really hate your job sometimes
That's doesn't work with all Doctors. It doesn't matter how hot you are, certain Doctors don't care and will still be rude. As you age, you become LESS hot, anyway.
Caroline, you are so beautiful. I m sure every patient and doctors are enjoying just looking and work with you. I m in medical school and that what every students are talk " I wish I will have a hot RN working with me" lol
Great advice, but I was hoping to hear about how to deal with docs who are rude in general without you doing something wrong (ex: calling about an order). I also think that it is unacceptable to allow bullying or humiliation in the workplace even if the nurse is at fault.. I'm sure that the doctor in the letter treats other people that way and that is something that needs to be addressed because there is no excuse for that type of behavior.
she's a blabber
Honey, she is right. Just own a mistake and move on, but that was such an A$$ move and so unprofessional for him to scold you in front of others. One thing I have taken away from the military: "Praise in public. Discipline in private."
+Katherine Thompson
Hi Katherine!!
Thanks so much for sharing that!!
I heard that phrase before & love it :)
Looking forward to seeing you on here again soon!!
xoxo
- Caroline
Katherine Thompson agreed!
I don't mind admitting my errors. I only give respect when you earn respect✊ . I am diplomatic but If I don't stand for nothing then I will fall for everything! I sometimes put my foot in my mouth 👄,but at the end of the day I am proud of who I am!
What is it that allows doctors to be verbally abusive? It is bullying on a grand scale. These days in the highly competitive world of medicine and those who wish to become doctors, they really should find only those with good communication skills period. I am watching this as a patient who was treated with disregard and insensitivity and this doctor made me feel like I was trash. He obviously didn't like me or was having a bad day. It is inexcusable really. Clearly he went into medicine for money or status or to make his parents happy, not because he truly wanted to help people. I can only imagine how horrendous it must be for nurses. I think your tips are spot on and make a lot of sense. I am trying like you said not to keep reliving the experience with that doctor because it makes me madder and madder.
I, also a patient, had a horrible experience (physical abuse and then libel in my medical records by an on call Neurologist) 2 years ago and the entire system backed up the rogue doctor afterwards. This mental technique works if the incident is an isolated incident, but I'd say that even for a nurse, if some doctor really has it in for you then it would be better to look for another job as soon as possible, because often it means administration condones this type of behavior. I think this kind of thing is way too socially accepted in our society, but there are workplaces that have good management and do not sit by and condone abusive behavior by Prima Donna doctors who think they're above the law.
Some great comments. Bottom line for physicians: it is never o.k. to berate another medical professional. Period. Nurses, you need to use your facilities' reporting system to alert administration to this behavior as it promotes an adversarial atmosphere that does nothing to help the patients.
Tammy W. the patient's life and the doctors license is on the line and you think he/she should not reprimand you. Millennials need to put on their big girl/pants and get a thicker skin.
I rarely post comments on videos. I wanted to comment because I am so very impressed by your videos. I have watched a few of them.
I worked as a firefighter for most of my career then after my son was born I went back to school to become a nurse. Nursing is the most challenging and rewarding job I have ever done. There is so much to learn in nursing. I am still new and learning. There are many days I think, was I crazy to do this. But there is also so much I love about the job.
Your videos not only give great advice but you are also supportive. You are a great resource for all of us new nurses out there who are learning and dealing with the bumps in the road to get to being an experienced nurse. Thank you very much!!
+Lorynn Rainieri Hi Lorynn!
Thank you so much for sharing this :) I appreciate it so much!!
Please keep in touch!!
xoxo
- Caroline
"Each problem solved became a rule which served afterwards to solve other problems." - I know it's not a quote necessarily about mistakes, but it is one of my favorite quotes about learning from experiences :) Love your videos! Please continue to make more, they're so beneficial for me going into the nursing program at my school.
I absolutely LOVE your advice! I think the surgeon scolding her in front of everyone was maybe his way of making sure she realize how important medication mistakes can be. Luckily, this mistake was not life threatening, but what if it had been? Just use it as a learning experience and thank God nothing bad came of it and you can still practice as an RN! :)
shes a very passive person shes teaching you how to be passive. However this doesn't fix the situation.
Hi Corey,
I totally understand!
However, is it possible that sometimes the situation is one that could be perceived differently?
Not all battles are worth fighting...
However a peaceful approach, will always transform you into a better person.
Much Love,
- Caroline
I really like your positive approach but it seems a bit passive. Many times physicians and other providers are just having a bad day and don't realize how they are acting. A reminder that they are being unprofessional usually does the trick. If this is a chronic problem, these interactions should be reported through the proper institutional channel. Many institutions have policies against workplace bullying (also called lateral violence or horizontal violence).
Aaron Saxton Thanks for sharing Aaron,
Definitely important to examine each situation individually :)
Looking forward to hearing from you again soon!
Much Love,
- Caroline
Yes because it puts the patients at risk of harm if co-workers can not trust each other.
I think this is a great way to deal with negative thoughts over a bad experience at work! If you try to explain yourself, it only looks like an excuse. And you are right, we don't need to constantly talk about it to others, it only enhances the negativity of the situation. It is best to just fix what can be fixed and learn from it, being thankful that it wasn't life threatening. Don't allow yourself to wallow in humiliation, but be aware of your shortcomings so that you can improve them!
Wow!! That is a great summery of everything I wanted to portray in this video!!
You are awesome!! Thanks so much for the comment!!
xoxo
- Caroline
THANK YOU for this. I struggle so much with re-living bad memories/mistakes. Thank you for sharing your advise.
It's helpful to talk about things that have upset you. This is not relieving it, it's getting some clarification and finding a better solution to the problem from another view. Otherwise, you can imagine all sorts of things for days and days.
I love your videos! I just had a difficult day with a doctor and on my way home I found myself getting really down and being super hard on myself. This video was the perfect end to my night and definitely made me rethink the situation and realize that this is a learning experience! Thank you :)
Jessica Angelone Hi Jessica!!I'm so glad to hear that :) It does not excuse inappropriate behavior...
However, we can choose the meaning that we give the situation :)
Thanks so much for the comment!!
See you on here again soon I hope!!
xoxo
- Caroline
I was really hoping that after accepting and owning your mistakes, you’d give advice about professional ways to stand up for yourself. Even if it was your fault, it’s not ok to be scolded in front of peers and patients.
How do you deal with a rude patient or a worrisome patient. I know and understand that 9/10 or even 10/10, that the reason why a patients behaves the way they do is because they are sick and maybe anxious. So that is when I try to be as empathetic as possible. However, sometimes I just get the feeling that they want to push buttons.
Wendy Pineda Hi Wendy!
There will always be people around to push your buttons.
I look at them as "life trainers" kind of like: "I need to learn how to effectively deal with this type of person in order to become the person I am destined to become."
I also just try to do what they are asking me to do (hopefully I can) fast & stay away as much as possible until they calm down.
I find that many times if someone is complaining of pain, for example... and for some reason or the other there is a delay... the best thing for me to do is to give it to them....
Then check back later when their pain is better and do my best to treat them as if nothing ever happened :)
I hope this helps!!
xoxo
- Caroline
Wendy Pineda that is so true. Trust me I have had six major surgeries in my life. 3 brain surgeries and 3 leg surgeries for spasticity in my legs. I also have hydrocephalus. So I deal with a lot of headaches. I am also dealing with lot of abdominal pain and leg pain and chronic body pain everyday which doctors are not able to figure out. I do not like hospitals, doctors, or needle procedures. I have been through a lot of blood draws, ivs, scans that require iv contrasts, and other needle procedures. I cry and tense up and shake. I think medical professionals need to understand this and not be curt and rude to their patients and what they are going through. There is a lack of empathy. It does not matter how much knowledge is gained through medical school or nursing school. This is something that I feel cannot be taught. It has to come from within the individual. I am lucky that I have had really caring surgeons who did my surgeries.
Please don't EVER take this video down, I am bookmarking it, and am pretty sure that someday I will need to review your advise! Thank you!
Debi Tyler Ok Debi!
It will be waiting here for you forever!!!! :D
Thank you for letting me know that you liked it!
Hope to see you on here again soon!
xoxo!
- Caroline
This is so good. I've had experiences with mistakes and being a perfectionist (which I don't think is really healthy), it just broke me down. Reliving the situation and trying to associate it with a good memory is a great idea.
Amazing thank you really helps because we all will experience this as nurse and in life we are not perfect so we will make mistakes it's about honesty admitting what we have done and how we can improve for next time so long you have the passion to be a good nurse you will overcome these hiccups stay blessed prayer for me is vital and without god I do not how I would survive thanks Caroline love you x
So nice to see you again Krystal!!
So glad you found it helpful!!
Thanks so much for the comment!!
Cannot wait to see you again soon!!
Love you!!
- Caroline
Wow this video is very inspiring. I literally paused the video to rethink about such a memory I had, and I'm feeling a great change. I must say you give the best advice that anyone can relate to. Thank you.
Always check the chart after getting report. Nurses can be tired and overworked too and they might mistake a patient for another. We hope this never happens, but that’s why we double, triple check. I don’t play with Doctors’ orders, a pt’s life depends on it. And she is right, don’t talk about the issues with co-workers, bring it up to the director or nurse manager instead. Address it privately to avoid this happening again.
What a great way to turn a negative experience into a positive one, and also a great time to learn and grow. This will help me now and in the future. Thanks so much for sharing, I think your page is wonderful, I'm going to show all of my nursing school friends your page because I think it's so helpful and full of wonderful ideas.
Hi Merissa!
Thank you so much for letting me know & for sharing the page!
It means a lot!!
See you again soon!!
xoxo
- Caroline
I love, love, love! your mental reframe. That is such an awesome idea. Thanks for sharing it.
Anytime Reiven!!
Thank you so much for this comment :)
Im a family caregiver and I am dealing with a VERY rude colorectal surgeon for my father’s hemorrhoid surgery. I have called 3 times over the past 4 days because my father has experienced diarrhea following the post op instruction of 3 stool softners a day and also he had 103F post op. He’s fine now, but everytime I called this doctor for instruction which the post op paperworl says call him if we experience any of these symptoms and he sounds pissed and speaks to me in such a condescending manner. So first I dont feel so bad being targeted seeing as a lot of surgeons seem to have a shitty attitude even to their staff nurses who handle the aftermath of every procedure. So what advice would you give if the doctor is unbelievably rude and condescending to a patient? I’ve thought about waiting until my father’s healed and leaving a scathing review but I honestly want to forget he exists after this experience instead and give him no more time or energy. What could I do in the future though if I ever run into this again? Any thoughts?
I agree. We really have to be sharper in our actions as RNs and that comes with experience. Be more forgiving of yourself. And always think for the patient's safety in all of your nursing decisions and actions, eventhough it is ordered. Have fun being an RN! :)
TheRickoblitz Thank you so much for sharing this!!
Loved it :)
Looking forward to seeing you again soon!!
Much Love,
- Caroline
I still remember getting yelled at on the phone by an md for being on hold while I finished up in a cpr situation. How dare I leave them waiting, Im sorry the person who picked up the call did not check back with the call on hold. How can I help you.
So ridiculous 😅
This is great advice for any kind of difficult time others have in their daily lives! I am starting cosmetology school which in no way can compare to what you do or had to do while attending school but attending school full time and working full time is something i've never done. Seeing how graceful you react to a situation like this is definitely helpful. I will apply this to my daily life. Can you make a video on tips for eating on a busy day? I want to be as healthy as possible while I have 5 long days which seems difficult with little time in the day. What do you do when you go to work for a good meal?
Absolutely correct!! Accepting our flaws to meet our expectations.
Thanks you for this video! Watching all of your videos makes me so excited to become a nurse! I am so excited to start this amazing journey..thank you for everything you do and all of your advice!
xoxo
I also was wondering where I can e-mail you at?
Stephanie Cianciolo Hi Stephanie!
So glad to hear that you have found the videos to be helpful! It really is my pleasure to make them! I love nursing & I think we have to potential to have a super awesome life as a nurse... so I love vlogging about it! My email address is Caroline@EmpoweRN.com!
Talk to you soon!
xoxo
From my 61 yrs of life experience with doctors,
and I have met tons of them and I have to say
less than 10% of them have good bedside manners
and kindness!! The rest are egomaniacs and rude and
obnoxious.
Ma'am, i am absolutely in love with your channel. I do have a request, though, unless you already have a video about this topic: Would you consider making a video about "How to Deal with Rude/Agressive Nurses," please?
As a frequent patient, I've met very kindhearted nurses over the past 6yrs, but i simply haven't the heart to "report" the ones who would tell me to "shut up" while I gagged & whimpered in pain, all the while I was sharing a room with 4 other patients, all older than myself. (Ranging 45-70+)..
Or when people labeled with the tags "RN" decide to make a mockery of my handful of diagnoses' and claim things like, "Someone with lupper and lower quartile spasms wouldn't be confortable laying that way." (Curled into the fetal position loosely, trying to relax the muscles on at least one side of my body) or, "We can't help you. There's nothing we can do for you. You came here because of your own decision, so you need to learn to control your pain." After a paramedic or doctor had saved* a dose of muscle relaxants for me, since i had veen coping well enough during transport, despite the feeling of my ribs opening up like wings.
*I live in Canada; Apparently EMTs can use 1 dose on the patient while in transport, unless unneeded, or specified via phone call to the hospital & to be used before a doctor is able to reach the patient, if the he or she is very busy that day.)
These situations have happened quite a lot over the past 6yrs, and they bring distress not only to my own coping skills and esteem, but to my partner, my parents, my sister and niece-- we all do not know what to do about these actions, albeit encouragement from other family members to file a report, and ourselves worrying that other patients with chronic illnesses will experience the same emotional distress. We would all feel terrible seeing someone lose so much of their life's efforts simply because of my conditions; there must be something we are not seeing here, and i feel that you would be able to answer this question very well for us all.
We all need Heros like you to share with the world this great and practical advice. Thanks much. :)
that is very stressful to be on a situation like that.i remembered when i was a student and on duty to be a scrub nurse on operation.i met an old doctor who would do nothing but to embarrass everyone in front of a patient.because of my nervousness i hand him a wrong instrument that made him throw it away.jeez!what i did that time to lessen the burden of stress is i bit my lips hard as i can, switch off my sensitive meter, and see the funny side of it as i secretely smiled to myself.good thing im wearing a face mask to hide my evil smirk on my face.
Excellent advice!!!!! When we are all NEW things like this happen even in the Ambulance great job!
I listened to the audio and it was AWESOME! it's like I had a little angle me on my shoulder talking and encouraging me. :)
Awe Yay!!!
So glad that you liked it :)
I love putting good thoughts in my head... so I though you guys might like it too!
So nice to see you on here again!!
I'm working on your video... you requested on another comment... look out for it ;)
xoxo
As a doctor, and human, I think all healthcare professionals lose their temper at times... Most important thing is to reflect, apologise and move on.
Yes you have to be positive with them and then a nurse for 25 years. I’ve tried explaining myself and it only makes you look like you’re trying to make “excuses” trust me it’s best to handle it exactly as you said it’s not being passive it’s just being realistic. Because one bottom line comes down to it you can write the nurse up or send an email to the manager explaining that she did not give you a proper report and explain your situation to your unit manager so they can talk to the nurse I don’t care how long she’s been a nurse people make mistakes.
Thank you so much for this video.It really helped me.
Denise Thomas Hi Denise!Thank you so much for letting me know.I'm glad it helped you :)Keep in touch -xoxo
Youre videos are great & anyone who puts a thumbs down serisouly does not know how to accept their flaws and how to be responsible for their actions. You need to teach after years of nursing!
Thinking about me doing things perfectly only upsets me more because then I start thinking "well why didn't I just do that?"
replaying the memory differently is the law of attraction. you are amazing, goddess. thank you
Your video was very helpful, thanks! I have a family situation with an angry older ill relative. This gave me some good ideas!
Your videos are a God-send. Thanks so much for your wise advice!
My first tactic is to try changing doctors. Bad receptionists will also cause me to switch doctors! I don't have a very good opinion of the way allopathy is conducted or practiced in this country (USA) anyway.
This is so great. Please never stop making these helpful videos!!!
Thank so much for letting me know :)
Cannot wait to see you again soon!!
xoxo
- Caroline
Thank you this is a great talk.You have a good heart. Well done! :) :)
Thank you. It happened to me today. Non, life threatening-I run to youtube for tips and such. Thank you for your advice.
this is so great....thank you so much for sharing!! :) i graduated in June 2013 and have been at my first RN job since sept 2013. great advice!!!
If it wasnt for nurses, doctors would all be banned from practicing. Nurses run the roost!!
excellent! nurses are wise people, we'll age well
+hell0h0bbit
Thanks a lot for the compliment!
I appreciate it.
Looking forward seeing you here again.
-xoxo
i agree that you should own up to the mistake. but before you move on, pull that doctor to the side and informed him, "the mistake i made today won't happen again. (this is where you smile and even giggle saying) thank you for informing me of your disappointment, but next time don't scold me like i am a child and especially in front of everyone, just to make your point. all you had to say was what you wanted in a respectful manner, okay! I'm going to have to write up an incident report, because that's not how you treat people and so, this also doesn't happen again. Have a good day." then you move on. just because you're a doctor doesn't give you the right to treat people that way.
I went to a doctor to get some help with deal ing with the pain from Lupus and give me injections to help with it. The first visit before any test he ran came back, He started giving me injections in my back. the second visit all he was worry about is my fat and saying I was fat and need to lose 50 pounds and give me some diet pills that has bad side effects that would add on to my pain levels. Look I know I was overweight and I take 4 insulin shots per day and that makes me gain weight. But he was rude and was pissed off by someone else before I saw him, but I was in his line of fire and he was mean to me. on kindly matter to other feels and simply not knowing to understand his problems and move on with it in the other person who took the blows. I know I'm fat and I've tried so many times to lose it. This doctor was to manage my pain and give me injections, instead I got a pain in a ass that tries to push other medicine instead the ones I need the most.
I was anxious on my first gyn onc physician visit who has an excellent reputation. I had a huge pelvic mass arising reproductive structures and hernia. I’m petite, age 68, a former dancer, weight 103, former height 5’2” to now 5ft. Due to this tumor I went down to 81lbs. After introductions he told me I looked like an emaciated African in front of his 5 assistants. I was rather shocked, felt I was shamed and hurt. I held my tongue as I looked at his staff then replied, “I do”? , rather then confronting him in front of his assistants. There was a quiet pause when I stated I was scared. His response was he was scared! I again felt rather shocked replied, “your scared, oh my God” I was not only intimidated by this well respected surgeon but I had to trust this surgeon with my life who not only insulted me but is telling me that he is scared. I was then rushed to sign papers as the nurse spoke so rapidly explaining medical details of surgery scheduled in 3 days. I told her I’m 68, anxious to slow down as I can’t grasp medical terminology. I was shaking from fear, freezing cold office and dressed lightly with no sleeves being quite hot outside in FL. This was a horrible experience as I also have trauma grief from loss of my daughter which was noted in medical documentations. I was then told to go to their one stop labs, X-rays, cardio, and labs still trembling, freezing and exhausted 3 hrs later. The surgeon also suspected low grade cancer. I proceeded with surgery as I felt was urgent. I’m grateful this huge tumor was removed , benign, with surgical laparotomy, total abdominal hysterectomy, bilateral salpingo oophorectomy and umbilical hernia resection. I still am disturbed as to why I was treated so harshly as this very experienced surgeon had to know I was suffering, unable to eat, digest, along with bowel obstruction to be humiliated as I undeservedly was. Does anyone have a sensible explanation because I don’t want this to ever happen to any of my sisters.
"Ad astra per aspera" through the hardships too the stars.
Nice!! I have never heard of this before! Thanks so much for sharing!!
xoxo
'a mistake is never truly a mistake until you refuse to correct it' JFK
It would be wonderful to hear your insights on bullying!!! How does a new grad cope with all of that?
Hi Annellese!
It is so nice to hear from you!!
I do have a video that explains how I deal with stress & bullying..
I will post the link below :)
I really hope you like it!!
Let me know if you would like to see a different type of video!!
Looking forward to hearing from you soon!!!
Much Love,
- Caroline
Link: th-cam.com/video/69qePTsC1MY/w-d-xo.html
Anneliese C th-cam.com/video/hGM9_BNR9jg/w-d-xo.html
You have great insight :) thanks for sharing!
Hi Meghann!!
Thank you so much for letting me know!!
Cannot wait to see you again soon!!
xoxo
- Caroline
love this video! love your optimism
We teach people how to treat us, if you roll over, you will continue to get stepped on.
I FOUND THIS VIDEO REALLY HELPFUL.
Very wise advice - thank you!
The "chip" thing is great! Unplug a though and deal with it. Thanks... :)
thanks for getting this video out
very positive! I like your attitude.
Eve Rutland Hi Eve! Thank you for letting me know. I really appreciate it. Keep in touch! -xoxo!!
love your video even tho I'm not a nurse yet
You will be one day ;)
Thank you so much for the comment!!
Cannot wait to see you again soon!!
xoxo
So if you are right...you still apologize?
Great advice! love this video.
Gretchen Mann Hi Gretchen! Thank you very much for letting me know you love it.It means a lot.Can't wait to see you here again.-xoxo!!
Very great advice! However, I do miss a tiny bit of info I'd wish to get out of this video.. Is there any way to respectfully "not take it" Like when a doctor is being rude to you which results in you compromising patient care because you're afraid to be embaressed again since that doctor can have poor communication skills (like the one of the email you got, scolding in front of other colleagues) how do you set boundaries?
Great information. Thank you
Vickie Felix Hi Vickie!
Your welcome! Thanks so much for letting me know you liked it!
Hope to see you on here again soon!
xoxo
- Caroline
what about assertiveness training in this viseo? being shamed on the job is unacceptable and should be reported to human resources.
I adore this woman!! So awesome!
Very wise for one so young!
Great advice!
Thank you so much for letting me know!!
xoxo
Thanks for the video. Hv u considered going on to finish medical school to become a doctor ?. Im a grad nurse atm and thinking about it cheers
Hi Linus!
Really nice to hear from you!
I personally have not... I just have a lot of other goals that I feel are my calling..
But you know, if that is your dream... go for it!
I know a lot of Doctors who started out as nurses :)
I hope this helps!!
Looking forward tot hearing from you again soon!
Much Love,
- Caroline
Thanks. Another question. I usually take a lot of feedback as constructive criticism. Recently while starting, I find that I have been overly criticised on everything by a few of the senior nurses almost to the point where I feel quite useless. This only happens from a few of the nurses, others have been really positive and supportive. It seems to really lower my self-esteem.What can I do ? Cheers
I would tell him not to dare speaking to me like that
If you've ever taken the Meyers Briggs personality test? I am infj. I always assumed because of my personality, i would never make a good nurse. What's your personality type?
+Janette Blanco I'm an ISFJ. I assumed I never could be a nurse for reasons including the huge responsibility and math skills etc, but I'm now an RN in my first year of practice! Through nursing school I have learned that nursing is a HUGE field, and there are so many different options including working directly with patients in the hospital in a variety of settings (ICU, Emerg, palliative, surgical, medicine, pediatrics, obstetrics, geriatrics, psyche...) to home support to education (for other nurses and the public) to managerial office based roles. What sold me on nursing was my nurse friend angrily talking about someone not being cleaned up properly and realizing, 'I could do that.' There are bad days when I'm completely overwhelmed and need a good cry, but then there are those good days and moments when you get to be there for a pt &/or their family & know exactly why you're a nurse :)
Great tips!
Thanks so much!!
Wow !!!! This is legit advice!!!!
How about rude nurse to doctor ? How to respond when a lazy nurse rude to doctors?
Can I ask you caroline. What is a nursing teaching plan. Do you as an RN staff nurse have to make them. Is the teaching plan like or apart of the persons care plan.
Hi Tim!
I'm actually not 100% sure what that is... do you mean for nursing instructors or for patients?
I do not know what a teaching plan is. I hear it could be used for discharging a patient. I thought a teaching plan is for like a nurse educator educating a bunch of people. An example a Nurse teaching a bunch of moms how to breast feed their babies after delivering. I thought that would require a teaching plan. Do you make teaching plans caroline
amazing....it relieved ma stress
+evagreen kriti
Awe yay!!
So glad to hear that!!
Looking forward to seeing you on here again soon!!
xoxo
- Caroline
How do patients deal with rude doctors sometimes I'm sorry I think they purposely misdiagnosing because they judge people I've had this happen at our local urgent cares and there's not much to choose from in my city sometimes you'll get the same doctor and it's like oh no I don't want this doctor cuz he doesn't listen or she doesn't listen and they call you liars and then you end up in the ER the ER will hear what that doctor didn't hear it's like they really hate your job sometimes
We have been pressured to do chemotherapy treatments so the doctor becomes rich by pharmaceutical companies
you're so inspiring
Thank you Nessa!
xoxo
She's so sweet!!
Oh yes they are lovely aren't they?!
Thank you so much!!
xoxo
Why I m watching this, I m a doctor
Holistic nursing for the nurse!!!!!
Awesome thanks! :)
Anytime :)
xoxo
*****
I subscribed.
I like your videos
Excuse the typo on line 3
You are such a beautiful person
you're magical
Thanks a lot!
How to deal with rude doctors. Step 1. Be a hot chick.
DeezNuts Lol!
That's doesn't work with all Doctors. It doesn't matter how hot you are, certain Doctors don't care and will still be rude. As you age, you become LESS hot, anyway.
I just love you
Talk about tomorrow Southern home
Caroline, you are so beautiful. I m sure every patient and doctors are enjoying just looking and work with you. I m in medical school and that what every students are talk " I wish I will have a hot RN working with me" lol
Can I contact you through email? And whats your email ID? Thank you! Ps I love all your videos!(: you are amazing..
Ee
Oh please gtf