How To Go Out Alone And HAVE FUN!

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 4 ก.พ. 2025
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    Gent Z Video - • How to Go to a Bar Alone
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ความคิดเห็น • 204

  • @kenthawley5990
    @kenthawley5990 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +57

    After my divorce, I was a recluse for three years. Then it dawned on me I was dying the slowest of deaths waiting for others to lead me out of my depths. I decided to put myself out there in various ways, finding activities I could do on my own--hiking, biking, kayaking. Afterward, I would find a great place to eat, sit at the bar, and talk with the other patrons and the bartenders. I met a lot of great people, dated some great women, and had some great times. You CAN go places by yourself.
    Oh, and I am a 4, a true extroverted introvert. I have learned over time in social and professional settings to get over my reticence and talk to people. It doesn't come natural, but I know it's a skill that's necessary to living a full life.

    • @CoachSteveJandS
      @CoachSteveJandS 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Same 🎉

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      Very well said Ken! Thank you for sharing!

    • @beautyparadise4832
      @beautyparadise4832 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      How did you learn or what did you do to overcome your introverted mind to become extroverted introvert?
      I’m struggling to make this happen for several years.
      Cheers

    • @CoachSteveJandS
      @CoachSteveJandS 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@beautyparadise4832 go at your own pace

  • @TxmmyBeats
    @TxmmyBeats 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +23

    Going out alone is great! You’re on your own time, nobody bothering you, easy going and you get to eat good food. 10/10

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      Yes! Thank you!

  • @G.Charles73
    @G.Charles73 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    Been doing it for years - love it! I'm a 10 on comfort level. Being on the road often this is 'old hat' for me.
    A man needs to be comfortable with himself and going it alone.

  • @hugojimenez3324
    @hugojimenez3324 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    I go out to bars nearly exclusively by myself. When I used to rely on others to go out with me, they flaked, killed my game or tried to dictate the flow of the evening. So much better to do what I want, when I want and to meet new people every time.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Exactly! Well said!

  • @Steven-hk2wb
    @Steven-hk2wb 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    I learned that 30 years ago when he said talk to people like you already know them. It is great advice. I use that advice every day.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      So true! sometimes it starts with just making a statement and not asking a direct question.

  • @stylishoversixty9459
    @stylishoversixty9459 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +17

    As a single mature gentleman, I certainly can appreciate this video...admittedly I don't go out much, but it is indeed something I would be interested in exploring thanks for sharing so many useful suggestions!

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      My pleasure! Go do it!

    • @Steven-hk2wb
      @Steven-hk2wb 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      As John said, "Go do it!". I am quite the introvert, but my dad was an extrovert, and I remember everywhere he went with that stupid smile on his face talking to everyone. It worked. People saw his innocence and always surrounded him. The trick is to keep the conversation simple, maybe funny, then be the first to walk away. If they want to talk more, watch the body language, questions asked. You will know from that.

  • @Nick.Brough
    @Nick.Brough 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Good to see GentZ getting a name check here, he’s more like “40 UNDER fashion” but has a lot of solid advice for people of all ages. I’ve been to a coffee shop on my own a few times recently & you’d be surprised how the staff & other patrons engage with you.

  • @Fritz-f3x
    @Fritz-f3x 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Hello John, I have no problem with going out alone #9 , especially now that I've been watching your video's and upgrading my style and grooming, thank you so much!
    Fritz 66 from Riverside, Ca.

  • @toobasaurus23
    @toobasaurus23 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    I'm 43 and have always loved going out alone. Women gravitate to a man that is comfortable in his own company.
    I'm off to Europe for the first time in May. I cant wait for what awaits... so many friends to make, drinks to share, and women to meet. 😉

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  9 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Love it! Thanks for sharing!

  • @D2222
    @D2222 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    I appreciate this video. I go out often myself, I enjoy it. Nobody to pick up, or pay for or work around someone else’s schedule. I’ve learned to talk to everyone, waiters, people next to me etc. I make friends everywhere. Btw it’s sad these days people think a t shirt & jeans is dressed up, since everyone looks like they just rolled out of bed.

  • @peterredit1305
    @peterredit1305 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

    Hey Johno,
    I used to go out a lot on my own.
    Now I have a spicy sassy lady who loves me and loves to eat out with me!! 😁
    Great advice and great work mate!!
    Take care
    Peter 🦘🦘

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      That's awesome Peter! Thanks for commenting!

  • @chuckcribbs3398
    @chuckcribbs3398 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    Interesting topic. I’ve been happily married for 24 years, so not really an issue for me, but I do enjoy going out by myself shopping or just taking a drive. My wife is a dispatcher for our county sheriff so she works most 2nd or 3rd shifts, which leaves me by myself at times. Heading to the gun range or taking the tops off on my Jeep and just taking a drive out into the country is usually what I do.

  • @musicmanMJS
    @musicmanMJS 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Another great video John! I still say I am very glad I learned to square dance when I was 15 years old and called my first square dance at 17. I've dated several girls and now the girl of my dreams within the square dance community. Dancing is where the girls go. Square dancing is a social engagement It stays that way unless you want to try and elevate it with a particular person. I'm very happy. The girl of my dreams is taking me on a cruise later this year to celebrate my 70th birthday. I think other guys would meet and dance with several different great girls too. Learn to square dance, guys!

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Love it! Thanks for sharing!

  • @Citizen-by9vw
    @Citizen-by9vw 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Good video. Yeah, I've gotten to the point now where going out by myself is necessary. I've managed to do it a couple of times, and I'm still working on working up the courage to continue doing it. Thank you

  • @casey00X
    @casey00X 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    It DOES take A LOT of confidence to out by yourself.
    Thanks for the tips!

  • @Freedomone153
    @Freedomone153 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Loving your videos. Hi from Australia 🇦🇺

  • @19E37-e3i
    @19E37-e3i 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    The GentZ video was great. Cool dude.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Glad you enjoyed it!

  • @DesertMav
    @DesertMav 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Great video and subject. I haven't really gone out too much in quite a while, but this subject reminds me when I used to go out to happy hour with my old coworker group. It was great since it allowed me to open up socially and meet other coworkers that worked at the office. The bar was a little dive bar about 5 minutes from the office. I also started going to some singles events a little bit before 2020 and I made a couple of acquaintances, but had some fun during that time.

  • @kevinthailand2567
    @kevinthailand2567 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    100+ totally rock my adventures as a lone wolf. Single bliss. Truly enjoy a bourbon on the rocks and a seat with a view of the room. Good things happen more often than not 😊

  • @needmoney666
    @needmoney666 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    Very comfortable now but it has been a lifelong process of becoming more confident. Just went out the other afternoon to a sports bar to watch March Madness and met a bunch of cool people. It was worth it just to meet these folks who were alumni of my university. 10/10

  • @jeffreyharrison2723
    @jeffreyharrison2723 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Jeff here from the UK. Been following your tips for over a year, Boy do I get noticed now, recently I was at a bar and a lady asked an acquaintance of mine if he knew me, yes he said, he looks like he has money was her comment😅I dont, just make the best of what I have, I have had girls and guys compliment my look, all your doing really😊, and yes I am a 10 on going out alone.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Wow, she was bold! Funny how that works though! :)

  • @Clownboy15
    @Clownboy15 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    I used to tour with Ringling Bros and if there’s one thing I learned from the circus it was how to go out and have fun by yourself! Most of the time you’re surrounded by people. At the arena, on the train. Even when you’re in your room on the train the walls are thin. So it was nice to get away from everyone now and then. My friends all thought it weird that I had no qualms about going to a restaurant and a movie by myself. Indeed, here it is twenty-seven years later and I still have no issues going out by myself!

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Great perspective, thank you!

  • @raykleiner3151
    @raykleiner3151 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I'm with you on this one. Never had a problem being out alone in fact would argue its great fun. For me its 10 on a scale of ten.

  • @DiegoB0525
    @DiegoB0525 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    10/10
    Yes, it would be nice to go with someone but I'm not going to let that stop me from doing what I want.
    I've gone to the movies, and even to restaurants by myself. Its relaxing to be honest.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Absolutely agree!

  • @garyjones5947
    @garyjones5947 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I’m a 9 out of 10 on that scale. Absolutely love the freedom of going out solo and seeing where the evening takes me. Had some fab nights.

  • @Theo-ul8qm
    @Theo-ul8qm 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Loved the message in this video!
    One point that might help is to go out earlier if you're by yourself than if you are in a group. The seats at the middle of the bar always get filled first, so if you're there early you have a better chance of getting the good seats.

  • @paul0wen65
    @paul0wen65 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    10! Since the pandemic and living further from my downtown district, not as often as before, but I do get out almost exclusively by myself, say 98% of the time. I also travel, whether it's a day trip or extended weekend by myself. Conversation starting: 9.5. Rarely an issue.

  • @SeanA.Skeete-wd4vi
    @SeanA.Skeete-wd4vi 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I am extremely comfortable going out and even traveling by myself. I just simply "hate" being on someone else's schedule. I recently took a bus trip from my new home in Atlanta to my former home of New York by bus and it was wonderful. I spoke to someone around my age traveling with their young grandson and it was refreshing to see how much we had in common because of our generation. I was even able to learn and share each other life experiences. By the way, I discovered "Gen Z" recently and I'm "hooked" to his content. Even though he's a pre-legend I find him to have a very mature and introspective "soul". Another terrific "commentary". 😊❤🎉💯.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Love this! Thanks for sharing!

  • @MsMik100
    @MsMik100 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I loved the smirk on your face when you talked about going back to the casino that night.
    Ouuu John got lucky 😅😅😅😅

  • @69thPredator
    @69thPredator 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I’m 29 so I practiced going out alone in my hometown around 6 years ago which made me extremely comfortable going out and talking with random people. Fast forward a few years and it made living in a new city where I didn’t know anyone a lot easier. I travel a lot for work so it helps out in those cities as well. I’m going to push back a little bit on the t-shirt. You can definitely elevate a well fitted T with some nice pants and maybe a jacket of some sort. I’ve played around with it and I found that my choice of clothes really changed the kinds of women that were more receptive to me. Girls younger than me liked my more casual outfits and older women (late 30’s-40’s) liked a more classic look with a sport coat and whatnot. I live in Texas so when I go out of state for work, simply having my boots tends to be a conversation starter.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Fair enough! Appreciate your comment! Thanks for watching!

    • @69thPredator
      @69thPredator 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Absolutely! I subbed to your channel a little while ago to help usher me into my 30’s this year haha

  • @ronm6585
    @ronm6585 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Thanks John.

  • @chrisb3902
    @chrisb3902 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Yet, another banger of a video John!! 🔥Thank you for sharing Legend, I needed this one 👊🏻

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      My pleasure! Glad you enjoyed it!

  • @TheToddNJ
    @TheToddNJ 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Have to share my story, last year when I became single I knew I had to get myself out, but felt super uncomfortable, but refused to just lock myself away forever. I approached it the same way I approach my fitness and meditation practices, doing the reps will bring the strength. As I forced myself to start going out solo, it absolutely did become easier and easier. Now, my relationship had time to breathe and we are back together, but I still make it a habit of getting out solo. If you’re hesitant, for whatever reason, what worked for me, pick and evening, pick a spot, make it non-negotiable for yourself and go. Give it a chance.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Absolutely! Thank you for sharing!

  • @phillip_reynolds
    @phillip_reynolds 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I’m probably a 7/10. I’ve been to movies and early dinners solo. It’s pretty liberating honestly but I do enjoy having a guest(s). As far as starting conversation starters, I’m a 8/10. I don’t mind talking to strangers in person or online for that matter. Thanks for great another video, John!

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      My pleasure! Thanks for watching!

  • @Chilled_Mackers
    @Chilled_Mackers 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    I did it for the first time this year (I'm 43), I went to the local village pub for a pint - I was out of comfort level - there weren't any spare seats (its a tiny palce) which didn't help haha. I ended up reading the board where the local adverts were pinned - I didn't want to use my phone. I dunno, it felt strange, but not 'never again' strange - but I did drink that pint pretty quick. On the way home, I did wish there was more going on locally, rather than 2 village pubs. The local town is pretty much a dive, certainly no classy lounges - I'm begining to think I need to book an over-night at a hotel someone where a little more upbeat and try the solo outing again. I just feel awkward, I have no idea what to do with myself, other than look around and drink.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Yep, totally understand. Try to go on a Friday or Saturday evening when the place might be a bit more lively.

    • @Chilled_Mackers
      @Chilled_Mackers 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@40OverFashion Trying it tonight, same pub but with live music this time \o/ should be able to distract myself, from myself.

    • @Chilled_Mackers
      @Chilled_Mackers 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Update : So, whilst walking to the pub, I was nervous as hell - I went through a check-list - I had put some schmoo in my hair to tart it up a bit, face scrubbed, tidied my beard, moisturised and put on some aftershave. I felt like I had put some effort in, compared to my usual. I had my favourite short-sleeved shirt on (I got a compliment wearing it about 15 years ago - so it became my 'going out-out' shirt haha), a pair of tidy blue jeans and I opted for my tidy Vans (Black and white classics) rather than my brown loafers (it is a bit of a trek and I guessed I'll be standing for a while - so comfort over style). I felt like a bit of pleb for the first few pints, hovering between the bar, the door and the fruit machine - the music was good though and it certainly distracted me from myself. When a chair became free at the bar, I pounced on it! That is when I started to relax and enjoy it, a few random encounters, a couple passing chats - a fair few excuse me's of people trying to order drinks etc. It showed me just how out of the social loop I was, that experiencing basic manners were an enjoyable step up from my daily level of interactions! One lady (mildly drunk) started measuring my hand to hers, I immediately thought was, 'oh here we go, this old chestnut' - she then said, 'you know what they say about big hands...' I replied smiling 'yeah, small brains!' haha, her face was a picture of confusion before she started laughing. I didn't want to pursue it as she arrived with a fella, I had no idea what their situation was. The usual, 'you have a good one miss, enjoy your evening'. I then somehow got into chatting with others around the bar, a couple older ladies were chatting, having a laugh, randomly one asked for my number, so I called up myself as a contact (I don't know my own number) and passed her the phone, she saw the picture of my dog in the background and that lead to more chatting. It was strange how organic it all was. I did message her on Friday just gone, asking if they were going to the pub on that weekend, she replied that she had family over so she wasn't - but she did include 'am I missing something good this weekend???' with a smiley face. It took me an hour of looking at the message to work out how to reply to that. So I played it off with the usual 'I hope you have a nice time' etc and added 'there isn't any music on, I think the next music night is the 27th' - I had no idea how to respond, so opted for the safer side of things, incase I read the multiple question marks and smiley face wrong haha. I am telling myself 'It doesn't matter what happens, you went out on your own, talked to some people, had a good night eventually and that is a huge achievement'. I think I am meeting up with them again this weekend. It is funny how the nerves have already started, its only Monday. Thank you for this video chap, I think I have created a new challenge for myself, to go out at least once a month, rather than hide away and rot. I hope others read this and think 'if this introverted pleb can do it, then so can I'. Treat yourselves gents, worst case is - you have a couple pints.
      Editted for terrible spelling

  • @brianrocks7277
    @brianrocks7277 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I'm totally comfortable. As you say, it's all in my hands.

  • @Joepacker
    @Joepacker 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    When I was much younger, before I got married (35 years now) I would go out by myself all the time and vacation by myself and I would always meet and talk to people I didn't know and had great time. I can talk to just about anyone about anything and have a good time. You just have to be open to it.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Absolutely agree!

  • @rasta8088
    @rasta8088 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I love going out alone because it makes you talk to people more. 10/10

  • @growinginportland
    @growinginportland 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I used to do this all the time before the pandemic. I’m always an introvert, but it was so enjoyable to go to a bar order from the menu and enjoy some great food. Maybe I’ll start doing it again. Five out of 10.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Give it a shot!

  • @NYMetMike
    @NYMetMike 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    The more you do it the more you start to enjoy it. I used to be a 0 to 1 on this but have grown to a solid 6. Sometimes even just sitting at the bar and eating dinner and talking to the bar tenders if they're not super busy is enjoyable vs sitting home alone.

  • @canadafree2087
    @canadafree2087 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    I love that you don't make this all about picking up women. Men need friends just as well as lovers. Here is the "secret", no one knows you even exist unless you get out of your house. Go do those activities you enjoy, it will be much easier to find those who also enjoy that activity than it would be to filter through all the people at the bar to see if you have common interests. I am not a bar person but perfectly fine to dress up and go to a nice restaurant, however, because I don't drink I tend not to stay too long after the meal.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Thank you for sharing!

  • @boatswainsm8
    @boatswainsm8 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I travel to SE Asia by myself so I definitely have no problem going out locally by myself

  • @TulaneProf
    @TulaneProf 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    I am very comfortable being out alone “10”. My girlfriend doesn't understand how I do it. I think what helps is I was a bartender and a police officer for most of my career. In those professions, you have to be able to interact with people. Also, my mom is one of those people who never met a stranger and it rubbed off on me a little. Most importantly, you have to be comfortable in your own skin.

  • @tommyt6512
    @tommyt6512 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    No issues going to a restaurant and eating at the bar by myself. Trying to make the jump to traveling alone, but still haven’t

  • @Mike----
    @Mike---- 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I’m at a 10 going out alone and having conversations with new people. Besides the enjoyable interactions I’ve had, it’s liberating to know I’m not dependent on friends to go out and have a good time.

  • @12ryuzacki
    @12ryuzacki 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    10/10 taking myself out; 5-ish on talking to the other patrons.

  • @BossBrookeArmstrong
    @BossBrookeArmstrong 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I’m a 10 all the way for going out by myself 🙌🏻 but maybe a 5 when it comes to starting a new conversation with new people. At least when I am the one initiating it

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Appreciate your comment! Thanks for watching!

  • @bobbyrebholz2183
    @bobbyrebholz2183 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Here's a thing to think about: the majority of couples you see out and about, dudes in that relationship probably wish they were still single. They either settled and are simping or, are being gaslit and going out because of obligation. Unless you're with an amazing partner(which is rare but nobody will admit it), going out alone is a desire by most but nobody will say anything based on fear of rejection and rocking the boat. Single men are so much happier mentally and physically and we should embrace it. If you're constantly looking for a girlfriend and can't be alone, you have a lot to work on.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      I wouldn’t necessarily say that the ‘majority’ of dudes wish they were still single, but I will say there are many. Appreciate your comment!

  • @SimonChambers
    @SimonChambers 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I travel a lot for work, so am out for dinner alone a lot. I don't often end up in conversations, and I don't typically go to bars as I don't drink. but I'm just fine being on my own and out :)

  • @KevinMcClave
    @KevinMcClave 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I'm an introvert, so getting out and doing it is something I have to make a point to do, but it's becoming more common. I'm not shy, though, so when out I don't have a major issue interacting with others in the bar. Maybe a 7/10 comfort level. Could go up to a 9 depending on the place.
    Sitting at the bar is really a cheat code. I was always uncomfortable sitting at a restaurant table by myself and I probably still would be. In that there's nothing to do between the ordering and the food, etc. The bar setting often solves that and takes away the fidgety factor.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Thank you Kevin!

  • @johnparnell8571
    @johnparnell8571 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I did this 40 years ago after a relationship break-up. I chose a wine bar in a nice area (the right kind of people), I dressed smartly and sat at the bar. I got into conversation with the bar staff and, importantly, introduced myself and remembered all of their names. Before long, the familiarity of being a regular visitor and making small talk started to pay dividends and I made a ton of new friends, including a new girlfriend. The rest is history.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Love it! Thanks for sharing John! I’m a wine bar guy myself :)

  • @FeniksGaming
    @FeniksGaming 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    8/10 doing things like going to cinema, walk, gym, show etc. About 0/10 going to bar by myself. Somehow being alone in a bar makes me feel like a creep and in my mind everybody sees me like this

    • @noName-kn1lx
      @noName-kn1lx 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I would recommend going to the bar of a restaurant and eat at the bar. Regular bar? Full of people getting drunk? No thanks

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Try to realize that’s only coming from your mind. Nobody else cares, honestly. I would even argue that it makes you look more interesting being by yourself. I’m telling you, nobody thinks that, and it’s all in your head. I used to think like that too, but one successful night out fixed that for good. :)

    • @FeniksGaming
      @FeniksGaming 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @@40OverFashion I agree this is likely in my head there is zero evidence I have anyone thinks that but still makes it challenging. I will probably start doing some smaller steps for things like this to build up. I know I need to.

    • @noName-kn1lx
      @noName-kn1lx 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@FeniksGaming i hate to tell you no one gives a damn what you do… or what i do or what john does

  • @ChrisSturhann
    @ChrisSturhann 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Okay, I'm a bit of an introvert, not real comfortable making small talk, though I am fine talking with strangers if I think I have something in common with them. I do like craft beer, and I used work just down the street from one of my favorite breweries, and I used to like to go in and pick up a bottle or two of their beers on my way home from work. When I did this, I would usually order a taster or two. Sometimes, I would talk to people, other times not. When I would talk to people, it was almost always about beer. What are you having? The barrel-age brown ale or the imperial porter or whatever. Or just about beer in general. The thing is it was a very low key way for me as an introvert to get out of my comfort zone. If I went and only talked to the server, it didn't matter, because I was really there to pick up a bottle or two of whatever. If I went in and ended talking to people and hanging out and having three or four tasters and meeting a few new people, that was fine too.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Yes! Small talk like you described is perfectly reasonable! It’s also great practice!

  • @rb8058
    @rb8058 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Great shirt! Where is it from?

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Linen/Cotton blend from John Henric.

  • @sergeikuznetzov4110
    @sergeikuznetzov4110 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Just love this guy

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Appreciate you!

  • @beautyparadise4832
    @beautyparadise4832 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Comfort levels:
    Going out alone - 2
    Starting a conversation - 2
    Pathetic.
    After this video, I’ll push myself to try it more

  • @dont6441
    @dont6441 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    Another good tip before going out alone is get a haircut. Clean and neat looks and feels good.

  • @stanislas4990
    @stanislas4990 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Interesting video. I am going alone to restaurants and bars when I am travelling by myself, because I don't have the choice, and because I am in a different country or in a different city, and probably in a different mood.
    Where I live I don't go to restaurants and bars on my own, and I am wrong.

  • @vegasvalet9454
    @vegasvalet9454 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Never underestimate the opportunity for a night out, without company, without expectations and without any limits or restraints, be open to having fun, meeting someone entirely new and know your next adventure is waiting

  • @ericl7842
    @ericl7842 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    John, I remember years ago... my uncle always told me when i was in my early 20s... "Always drive yourself and meet your friends when you go out if you can... you will learn freedom to have a night you can control" This was huge... it taught me to be more independent, not count on others for an evening out and let me learn to be around crowds alone. #legend

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Great advice! Thanks Eric!

  • @defining_moments
    @defining_moments 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    10! Extremely comfortable

  • @Dills1995
    @Dills1995 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Old guy here. In my college years I really put myself out there with great success. I found out what women find sexy… it’s not good looks or height or even muscles. It’s confidence. Not to be confused with arrogance. Lost count of how many handsome rich guys I stole girls from in bars, etc.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Yep! Only years and experience will solidify that. Thanks for commenting!

  • @onebridge7231
    @onebridge7231 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Back in my 20’s I had started dating a girl from SoCal. We left St. Louis were I met her and flew there to meet her family (older sister) but not her dad and mom. I’m Caucasian and she’s Vietnamese so when her sister and her decided to leave to visit their parents they didn’t feel comfortable taking me and dropped me off at a bar restaurant on the beach that her sister frequented a lot. The Lakers game came on live and being an ex-submariner and known to enjoy a drink or two I had that bar jumping and cheering those Lakers. It was boring the 1st 20 minutes but I was the only one yelling and cheering. Eventually others joined. She called to check on me and the energy was explosive and cheering. Her sister couldn’t believe it was her stuck up boring place her husband always took her and my ex thought I was lying and found a club to go to. A great solo outing.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Ha! Great story! Thanks for sharing!

  • @ad6394
    @ad6394 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I’m an 8 in comfort level of going out by myself. I’m 62 and lost my wife a year ago. I’m striking up new conversations but most of the women I meet are in their 70s or 80s. Although I dated older women frequently when I was younger, I’d prefer to meet women either my own age or a few years younger. Any suggestions would be appreciated.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      First of all, I’m very sorry for your loss. Secondly, keep going out and keep talking to people. It’s OK meeting people and having conversations because that’s good practice. Perhaps start targeting women that you’re more attracted to, and start those conversations with them.

  • @raymondsmith2154
    @raymondsmith2154 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I've watched a few Gent Z videos lately, I'm going to add him to my mix. Any ideas for nondrinkers.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      It’s up to you and what other types of activities you like doing. I would say hone down that list, and do more of those things.

  • @guyh.4553
    @guyh.4553 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    These days, I do not feel comfortable going out alone. I have been this way since Oct '21 then before that 2011, when I met my ex-fiancé. I do go out by myself but that is to my American Legion post which is mostly all comrades in arms. I find it very difficult going out.

  • @dont6441
    @dont6441 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I need to go out alone more often. I'm probably a 3 on the comfort level scale. This video should help. Had been in a relationship for 7 years so I didn't need to out alone but single now.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Make it a point!

  • @danielfrancis3660
    @danielfrancis3660 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I saw the Gent Z video and i thought it was a very interesting topic. I go to pubs in the uk by myself and there's no issue with it. Most times i end up having a conversation with someone. It would be interesting to find out if women do the same thing.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Very interesting!

  • @Pault3788
    @Pault3788 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I go out every week by myself to listen to music,but not interested in talking or meeting anyone,loner all my life!

  • @frankmartinez4856
    @frankmartinez4856 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Go to lots of show(Rockabilly,others) meet, befriends lot of people 💕😬

  • @regsantotomas
    @regsantotomas 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I enjoy going out on my own especially when I’m traveling. But even at home, I leave the family at home for the occasional me time. So 9/10 going out by myself.
    But to be honest, I don’t go out to necessarily seek out company largely because I enjoy my time by myself as an introvert. I try, however, to be polite when approached for conversation. I can adapt for a period and then usually go back to my self soothing. So 5/10 😅

  • @hiranchbuff
    @hiranchbuff 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Married now, but when I was single, I routinely went out by myself. No problems ever meeting people. The key is to sit at the bar. Dont get a table for yourself. THAT looks sad.
    Bring a book, have a couple of drinks, order a meal at the bar. You'll meet people.
    And there is zero pressure to keep someone else entertained.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  9 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Absolutely correct!

  • @CanadaAstro
    @CanadaAstro 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I frequently go out alone. It’s not an issue at all . Talk to men and women. Put your phone away. Ask the bartender what drink he might suggest to you. He will ask a few questions. Dress for success. I’m not an extrovert.

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Absolutely! That’s exactly how you do it.

  • @jdhchi
    @jdhchi 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Going out solo 10, starting conversations 10

  • @roxtar38
    @roxtar38 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I'm married, so I don't often do that, but as a 57-year-old guy, that awkward feeling disappeared with age, and caring what others think doesn't phase me. What they think is THEIR problem. In fact, I relish those moments of peace and solitude occasionally.

  • @iio58
    @iio58 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I couldn’t. I’m fine doing to a restaurant by myself. Cinema by myself, but a bar - I couldn’t. Just don’t know why, like you said it’s the “lonely old guy” stigma

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      The thing is, nobody cares. I guarantee that you think about it more than anyone else. Again, nobody thinks that but you. If anything, it makes you seem more interesting.

  • @anewlifestirring
    @anewlifestirring 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Very appropriate and important
    Going out for the sake of going out 0/10
    Starting conversations once out for other purposes 5/10

  • @markgrantBJJ
    @markgrantBJJ 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I go out and travel alone most of the time.
    I decided a few years ago that I will no longer not do the things I want to do just because I don't have a plus one or a travel partner.
    And, like I told a recently single friend of mine, if you don't like being around yourself, then how can you expect anyone else to like you?
    10

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      100% Very well said!

  • @freeman436
    @freeman436 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Except for one grueling period of three years living with a psychopath, I've been single since 1999. Lot's of dating, girlfriends, etc, but primarily a bachelor. Now, I go alone anywhere, any time. I have disposable income. I run my own clock. Call my own shots. This lifestyle has always suited me best. And I go out quite a bit.

  • @walkerb1734
    @walkerb1734 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I’m married and love my wife. But I prefer going out by myself 8 out of 10 times. I’m not looking for trouble or doing things I shouldn’t be doing. But it’s just easier and more relaxing only looking out for me and not having to guess what she wants.

  • @RedRoyce
    @RedRoyce 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    No I've went out many times by myself. People kinda looked at me funny when I was talking to myself back and forth. LOL No I always found someone to talk to male of female. Just say hello guys and let it flow. You'll know fast if someone want's to be alone to think or not.

  • @greenapple1069
    @greenapple1069 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I'm 47M, an introvert; being alone is effortless, and it's my nature (really fun!)

  • @raykleiner3151
    @raykleiner3151 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I love going out alone|

  • @markskarbek2510
    @markskarbek2510 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    10 to going out alone and 10 to talking to others. I wear a suit and I’m more comfortable in that in all the other clothes I wear out

  • @jdemille79
    @jdemille79 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Very comfortable doing this but I always feel kinda awkward trying to start conversations with other people even though I am not even remotely close to being an introvert!

  • @alwayspooh1588
    @alwayspooh1588 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    "A t-shirt is the lowest ranking garment you can put on your body"!!!! Great advice, and the older I get, the less I wear a t-shirt. Great video John, as always.

  • @joecarnazzo4408
    @joecarnazzo4408 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Great advice but I don’t drink alcohol so I feel funny sitting at the bar

  • @fashionandfrags
    @fashionandfrags 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Honestly I'd like to have a regular bar joint, but I don't want the alcohol to stunt my gym gains.

  • @matthewveth2030
    @matthewveth2030 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

    My comfort level is fine, but I will say that waitstaff and bartenders are far more engaged and attentive towards groups and more aloof towards the solo customers.

  • @omarcortes5754
    @omarcortes5754 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    It's really not as hard as it looks like, the thing is we are always overthingking.

  • @CoachSteveJandS
    @CoachSteveJandS 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    ❤❤🎉 it's less awkward to be alone out qnd about than it is to be alone in the basement

  • @sdz9850
    @sdz9850 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

    What if you don't drink...and dont really enjoy going to places/being around people who drink?

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Categorize the things that you do enjoy, and do more of that.

  • @noName-kn1lx
    @noName-kn1lx 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Only place i would never go is to a club alone. Since i have no desire whatsoever to go to a club its not a big deal

  • @vvasko779
    @vvasko779 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I tell myself, when out alone, "it is ok to just exist".

  • @defendingyourbrand6547
    @defendingyourbrand6547 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    10/8🎉

  • @stibh5456
    @stibh5456 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

    10. Been doing it for years and recently realised that I've turned into an ambush predator

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Not quite sure what that means, but thanks for your comment. :)

  • @XanderJudd24
    @XanderJudd24 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I’m a 10 now. I first saw one of your videos in fall 2023, about going out alone. My wife of 45 years died in 2022, so it was difficult because I felt like it wasn’t fair to her somehow. But your encouragement prompted me to realize she would be happy that I didn’t stop living.
    So I dressed well and started taking myself out. Game changer for my confidence and helped me move out of deep grief. Thank you

    • @40OverFashion
      @40OverFashion  10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      My pleasure! Incredibly, sorry for your loss, but I’m glad to hear you’re still willing to live your life. Appreciate your comment! Thanks for sharing.

  • @andreaskampmiller7756
    @andreaskampmiller7756 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    11! 😁

  • @BrianCapezzone
    @BrianCapezzone 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Some days I'm a 9-10 and other a bit less. It depends...but usually I'm ok with it.

  • @officialcamify
    @officialcamify 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Am 33 year old and I didn't fall in any relationship ever . I don't have friends. It's normal for me to live alone out doesn't matter for what task I get out of from my house. Women and girls also don't like me 😅