When shit starts to really hit the fan they’re going to have to put In Martial Law so I hope people are smart enough to not let that happen but we know better than that. Too many people are too selfish and there’s far too many turds that will start bugging out before it’s even that bad but they’ll make it worse and thus here comes the tanks and now we’re really F’d. I hope they just round up the F tards that bought all the toilet papers. 😷
Yes that is what they do while monitoring all of us with algorithms/AI which tells them what they have to do in order to get away with this or that. Remember they've been doing this for far longer than most people even realized.
Going through all the 2020 and 2021 episodes. I didn't even know who Tim was at the time. Wish I could have caught this at the time. Perfect pandemic podcast.
Taught my 6 year old to say " life in the big city" he's using it well and in context when I inform him of another unfortunate side effect of all this😅 Granny is sick, he says with a smile " life in the big city". 🤗 RIP Grandma
The fact that these essential Corona-era vids don’t have more views shows that many of the last year subscriptions aren’t doing the deep dive. That’s a shame.
Tim Dillon is one of the best stand up comedians as of now. His podcasts are great and he's able to keep up a hilarious monologue for over one hour just talking off the top of his head. He has a quick mind.
What could be the next currency in the new world? Well, for the elite, there's always child's blood. For the rest of us? Jewels by podcaster Tim Dillon
But I still haven't gotten mine. I've convinced most of my friends and family to order their jewels from me, because of the lifestyle, but now they're getting angry.
Ya joey “coco” diaz for one .. guy is so overrated by them.. sure he is probably fun to have around at a party when he tells a story but he is not a comedian at all.. there is absolutely no craft to his shit and I personally enjoy seeing a guy work and polish up his material.. he just goes, oye motherfuckers, swears more and tells an embellished story that ive probably already heard and then calls people motherfuckers some more..
Man your show has trandcended the normal comedy podcast realm at this point. This legitimately needs to be heard for reasons way beyond coping with this event with humor. Please continue to use your platform to help wake people up. Thank you, Tim, for real.
I feel that this episode was the turning point in the Tim Dillon Show, as far as Tim being our senior color commentator for the dumpster fire/shit show that all of our lives have devolved into! This is beautiful
“A fire broke out backstage in a theatre. The clown came out to warn the public; they thought it was a joke and applauded. He repeated it; the acclaim was even greater. I think that's just how the world will come to an end: to general applause from wits who believe it's a joke.” ― Soren Kierkegaard
"Heard joke once: Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world where what lies ahead is vague and uncertain. Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. Great clown Pagliacci is in town tonight. Go and see him. That should pick you up.' Man bursts into tears. Says, 'But doctor…I am Pagliacci.' Good joke. Everybody laugh. Roll on snare drum. Curtains."
I can totally picture tim shooting at looters in a really gay bath robe but then it turns out the looters were actually raccoons and ray kumpf rifling through the trash.
39:35 "are we gonna be living under marshall law and still watching jimmy fallon? shut it down!..." tim you are fucking brilliant lol shit had me dying
All sarcasm aside, I’m so glad we have a reliable source for news and honest observations finally. The humor is a bonus. Tim Dillon is full of unappreciated wisdom. The best jewel by podcaster Tim Dillon is Tim himself.
This Tim approves this Tim as required consumption during the Pandemic. Put the pictures on the wall folks. Don’t know what I’m talking about? Keep watching, Johnson.
This episode really just smacked me in the face how this all will add up. I mean It's a complex issue that takes a lot of thought and same with predicting it, however this episode really lays it all out more cleary. Definitely raised my level of preparation for this and anything happening including something truly terrible
I motion for tim to do a character named marshall law who is a very conservative investment banker with a diverse portfolio of toilet paper companies defending corona virus
How about 'Health-Bracelets' instead of implanted chips? TH-cam 'style ur bracelet' tutorials will ballast the economy and everybody will look great and probably feel better about themselves. Happy people = happy economy.
Yo gang, if any viewers have questions about food stamps, medicaid, etc. I'd be happy to either share what I know or get an answer. We're still working at the welfare offices here in PA (presumably in many other states). It can be a pain in the dick getting reliable info on policy updates for that shit as Tom Hanks Disease keeps revving up. I'm looking forward to being able to quit and sell jewels for Podcaster Tim Dillon full-time. I mean, sell opportunities to my friends and family.
We finally need that guy who's social media is just a picture of him in the woods with a gun and a dog, frowning, with the caption, "I'm ready" That's Local Man, Florida Man's absentee father
For archives and weekly bonus episodes: www.patreon.com/thetimdillonshow
Merch! Hoodies, mugs! www.bonfire.com/store/the-tim-dillon-show/
#PLANdemic
This is what all the chuds thought Obama would do
do you think trump should donate his hotels to be hospitals?
When shit starts to really hit the fan they’re going to have to put In Martial Law so I hope people are smart enough to not let that happen but we know better than that.
Too many people are too selfish and there’s far too many turds that will start bugging out before it’s even that bad but they’ll make it worse and thus here comes the tanks and now we’re really F’d.
I hope they just round up the F tards that bought all the toilet papers. 😷
Yes that is what they do while monitoring all of us with algorithms/AI which tells them what they have to do in order to get away with this or that. Remember they've been doing this for far longer than most people even realized.
Straight from his shift at Target to doing a podcast!! I respect the grind, Timmy!!
😂😂😂👍
Who knew he worked at bestbuy, Walmart, AND Target?
Lol
Don’t include “straight” in a sentence involving T.dillon
I respect the hustle.
Marshall Law sounds like Tims next grinder hookup
I always thought it was 'martial law'
@@kaizen5415 yeah, it is. Everyone is dumb as shit
That's a Tekken character
LMFAO yo is tim really gay or is this a joke
@@dankestranch8738 he's actually gay
Going through all the 2020 and 2021 episodes. I didn't even know who Tim was at the time. Wish I could have caught this at the time. Perfect pandemic podcast.
Taught my 6 year old to say " life in the big city" he's using it well and in context when I inform him of another unfortunate side effect of all this😅 Granny is sick, he says with a smile " life in the big city". 🤗 RIP Grandma
kitty Valentine Thank you for raising him with such a perspective 😂 he will be funny
@@couchman-sw6jy we're going to start a podcast. 😎
I can see it already. ‘Kitty & the Kid!’ Guests on this evenings Tonight Show!
@@kittyvalentine69 well podcasting is the only job that will be left in a month.
he will really fit in with the other kids
Tim encourages connections with family and friends to get through this, but I cancelled them all based on his previous advice
If you got your jewels buy tim dillon you'll be fine
You’re good, you are already under the curve
Being unattractive and having no friends is finally paying off. 😷
Love type o
@@Brennan009 stay negative θ
The fact that these essential Corona-era vids don’t have more views shows that many of the last year subscriptions aren’t doing the deep dive. That’s a shame.
Love watching podcasts from 2 years ago just to remember how insane the time period was
Tell me about it Bro
The only guy telling the truth is a podcasting jewellery salesman...what a world.
Low cost, high quality truth
Boom. Crushed this comment
Life in the big city
A tank next to the park......
........life in the big city
A lot of his predictions were spot on
we're now in the last 6 months of his 18-month prediction and i gotta say: he's scary accurate
He predicted Trump would go out with a bang and he was spot on. Tim is a smart guy.
Tim Dillon is the funniest guy out there, absolutely love this guy.
He is the only thing keeping me from offing myself
@Robert Phillips j n n jjp NBC bought
Gtf Sy
Countless brilliant moments and points. This episode is aging well. Thanks Tim
“If you’re still thinking in terms of left and right, you’re wrong” PAPA DILLON HAS SPOKEN.
J ronnn you started out so well then let your racism show.
Have a seat. Lol
Tim Dillon is one of the best stand up comedians as of now. His podcasts are great and he's able to keep up a hilarious monologue for over one hour just talking off the top of his head. He has a quick mind.
This episode will never get old. And it will get funnier and funnier every other year. Mark my words.
How long until Chrissy Teigen is live streaming how to load a Soviet-era anti tank rifle?
For once she might just have a shred of relevance!
would be an improvement over her "vagasshole" comment
What could be the next currency in the new world? Well, for the elite, there's always child's blood. For the rest of us? Jewels by podcaster Tim Dillon
But I still haven't gotten mine. I've convinced most of my friends and family to order their jewels from me, because of the lifestyle, but now they're getting angry.
Umm, bring back the Italian Lire? 🤔
Every single fucking minute of every single podcast is quality content. Truly. No other comedian can produce content like thos regularly
Truly
Remember a couple months ago, when it didn't make sense Tim was promoting backpacks for the Apocalypse 🤣🤣🤣
tim dillon had advanced knowledge! heard he had 2.3 trillion in student debt... NOW his interest is paused!
oh it made sense
Tim Dillon is where I go when Rogan is being horrendously unfunny or has the same played out comedian on his show for the 5th unfunny time.
You got it backwards. Rogan is where I go when I run out of Dillon.
@@TheEljefe20 you are correct sir
Ya joey “coco” diaz for one .. guy is so overrated by them.. sure he is probably fun to have around at a party when he tells a story but he is not a comedian at all.. there is absolutely no craft to his shit and I personally enjoy seeing a guy work and polish up his material.. he just goes, oye motherfuckers, swears more and tells an embellished story that ive probably already heard and then calls people motherfuckers some more..
@@terdferguson1736 great observation, Mr Terd Ferguson 🧐
And Tim Dillon is where I have stayed after the same revelation.
Ellen dancing with the miltary lmfao
Man your show has trandcended the normal comedy podcast realm at this point. This legitimately needs to be heard for reasons way beyond coping with this event with humor. Please continue to use your platform to help wake people up. Thank you, Tim, for real.
Still waiting on my Jewels by podcaster Tim Dillon... I’ve been telling my friends about the low cost and high quality jewels I can hook them up with.
DUDE SAME HERE!
BRo where my damn jewels timmy, .. Lol jk
@@JC-bs6jl Probably in the trash can.
U tell them?!
SELL them the dream.
no, they're high cost, low quality jewels
and here he is ladies and gentlemen, Tim dillon, out here looking out for everyone else but himself 😂😂 ur the best Tim
Legit one of the best podcasts I've ever heard
This is the moment Timmy became the new voice of his generation. I've been expecting this for a long time and all it took was the crumbling of society
I saw a picture of Chrissy Tiegen that had nothing to do with this podcast and my brain yelled “We’re just ordinary Cannibaaaals” damn you Tim
I love when Tim is so doom and gloom
“Marinara sauce covered fingers” lol
I’ve quarantined myself in a Wendy’s now I don’t have to worry running out of food an shelter.
they don't freeze their beef. it'll get spoiled......
@@patmald damn...
running out of food in a wendy's? there was never FOOD there in the first place
🧠👈🏻
Sir this is an arbys
I feel that this episode was the turning point in the Tim Dillon Show, as far as Tim being our senior color commentator for the dumpster fire/shit show that all of our lives have devolved into! This is beautiful
0:34:34 for corona virus the musical.
Damn Tim called it
"They don't necessarily rejoice but it doesn't f*ck up their day at all."
When I get the faintest hint of anxiety I go right for latest Tim Dillon update. And I'm Alright-!! Keep em coming big guy!! We need you!!!
Thank you Tim for giving us laughter in these times of trouble🙏
The way he speaks. Like music.
I’ve listened to this a few times already, quite comforting in these crazy times sir! Thank you
Tim's on the nicotine gum outta fear! God bless him.
🙏 god bless
I'm on the nicotine gum and I don't smoke.
@@lebulle4544 Are you doing a Masonic hand sign while you chew?
Good on him for dropping it into his hand instead of touching his mouth.
poor bastard
Tim Laykis Dillon is on fire, god damn!
“A fire broke out backstage in a theatre. The clown came out to warn the public; they thought it was a joke and applauded. He repeated it; the acclaim was even greater. I think that's just how the world will come to an end: to general applause from wits who believe it's a joke.”
― Soren Kierkegaard
"Heard joke once: Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world where what lies ahead is vague and uncertain. Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. Great clown Pagliacci is in town tonight. Go and see him. That should pick you up.' Man bursts into tears. Says, 'But doctor…I am Pagliacci.' Good joke. Everybody laugh. Roll on snare drum. Curtains."
Tim Dillon For President
When that Marinara sauce covered fingers rant was going on 🤣🤣🤣
The way he laughs at the rat when it gets squashed in traffic 😂 😂
It's a pleasure watching civilization crumble with you Tim. Take care of yourself so you can post videos when shit really goes sideways.
“Fauchi who’s probably a good dude” one quote that didn’t age well.
I can totally picture tim shooting at looters in a really gay bath robe but then it turns out the looters were actually raccoons and ray kumpf rifling through the trash.
39:35 "are we gonna be living under marshall law and still watching jimmy fallon? shut it down!..." tim you are fucking brilliant lol shit had me dying
Big REDDDD. Warm tones keeping me awake
Tim's radio DJ impression at 34:00 made me feel like he could be USA's "Three Dog" when the world plunges into Fallout status.
Thanks for this super pick-me-up show, Tim. Really appreciate it. LOL
I wish I lived in a place where the panic actually made sense. In a city with less than 100 cases overall, all the freaking out just isn't the mood.
Rob Cow seeing as you live in a town with 100 people I’d say you have the most appropriate profile picture of ALL TIME with that goat! Hahaha
Panic in the big city
Hey aslong as it's not at the disco
Crying in the big city 🌃
2:50 just a little funny watching the producer rub his nose and touch his face every time Tim says virus lol
9:05
9:25
10:32
12:30 the producer reminds me of Joker.
12:30 the producer reminds me of Joker.
awesome
might be the first patreon i ever sign up for
Tim better copyright his lines for Coronavirus The Musical before Hollywood takes that from the people too
Beautiful simply priceless Dillion finally a comedian that tells it like it is about this farce of a political system and its actors
All sarcasm aside, I’m so glad we have a reliable source for news and honest observations finally. The humor is a bonus. Tim Dillon is full of unappreciated wisdom. The best jewel by podcaster Tim Dillon is Tim himself.
This podcast is exactly how everyone felt when all of this started.
Tim Dillon, the modern Nostradamus!
This Tim approves this Tim as required consumption during the Pandemic. Put the pictures on the wall folks. Don’t know what I’m talking about? Keep watching, Johnson.
Nice to see TBTV here too!!
TBTV 👀 !!
This one was dark. Love it.
This episode really just smacked me in the face how this all will add up. I mean It's a complex issue that takes a lot of thought and same with predicting it, however this episode really lays it all out more cleary. Definitely raised my level of preparation for this and anything happening including something truly terrible
I motion for tim to do a character named marshall law who is a very conservative investment banker with a diverse portfolio of toilet paper companies defending corona virus
Tim Dillion is a dying breed of Americans. This man needs to be heard.
Tim, You are making my quarantine with my family bearable. Thanks for staying on man.
OUTSTANDING TIM 🔥 MORE OF THIS PLEASE
Dillon bringing content thick and fast..
Under President Hilldog America would've already been in Marshall Law.
Life in the big city.
With all this going on here in Croatia we got hit with a 5,3 earthquake half an hour ago. Truly the end of times...
@Vince Williams shits insane and now snow is falling on 2nd day of spring and yesterday we had 20 celsius, life in the big city...
...out at the Wilmuth farm, Grover’s Mill, New Jersey...eleven miles from Princeton...
Man I want you Ben, Chappelle, Rawlins, Rogan and Alex Jones all in one room for. 3 hours. I’d watch that shit 3 times in a 24 hour period
It is time for the coronavirus musical, Tim. From 2024
Bring back the porch
this
What was the point of this studio lol
The contrast in outlook between this and history hyenas patreon made for a fun day
Astonishing level of off the cuff humour. Well done.
last time i saw widespread panic i took five hits of acid and ate a corndog i found on the ground
That’s the first thing I thought of too when he mentioned widespread panic hahaha
Tim Dillon's merch was the only thing that got me through these tough times.
God this has been a couple of years
Dude, this man 100% predicted the future... yes or yes?
Can you please do one of these daily? The world needs it.
How about 'Health-Bracelets' instead of implanted chips? TH-cam 'style ur bracelet' tutorials will ballast the economy and everybody will look great and probably feel better about themselves. Happy people = happy economy.
Tim Dillon my favorite Irishmen
Yo gang, if any viewers have questions about food stamps, medicaid, etc. I'd be happy to either share what I know or get an answer. We're still working at the welfare offices here in PA (presumably in many other states). It can be a pain in the dick getting reliable info on policy updates for that shit as Tom Hanks Disease keeps revving up. I'm looking forward to being able to quit and sell jewels for Podcaster Tim Dillon full-time. I mean, sell opportunities to my friends and family.
I see TV producers writhing with excitement at the hopes of tapping into podcasts success, having their talent broadcast from home.
Tim droping that lozenge like a fancy lad
The setup for Coronavirus The Musical is gold... @34:47
Thank yall for real I needed a laugh my mom has chemo therapy while ducking covid like neo from the matrix fun fun
I love how all the planes are grounded and the sky is so blue
only Tim could make a pandemic fun - FUCKING AMAZING
56:00 this is so incredibly sweet
We finally need that guy who's social media is just a picture of him in the woods with a gun and a dog, frowning, with the caption, "I'm ready"
That's Local Man, Florida Man's absentee father
Thanks for the structure Timbb.
Tim Dillon 2020 🇺🇸
I love you Tim
Great Show!! Great Advice!! You're the Best of the Best!!! Thank you for the Honesty!
from 8:30 on is pure gold
Skip the ventilators. I want Gerber making coffins stat.
i love you
You are the best. Thank you!