@@ozymandias949 you’re coming to conclusions off of one passing comment and applying a whole narrative that is not in anyway in line with the core comment without asking a question that isn’t leading to suit your own narrative to suit your preconceived notions to satiate your need to be right? Are you dense?
@ozymandias949 you're just insulting people and not even attempting to elaborate what they could do better, bruh. Letting your ego delude you into a false sense of superiority based on the preconception of someone else's knowledge on a topic, in which you are equally as far from having a complete understanding as the other person, is only going to make you more upset at people. So why bother?
society has conditioned people into being so wholly obsessed with romantic relationships we no longer understand the value of platonic love or even what it can be.
@@magniskylol I hope you know if a guy just wants to be friends with you he is not attracted to you at all but he just sees you as a nice person, if he is attracted to you either he will shoot his shot or do things for you so that you notice
Yes society did this. It couldn’t have anything to do with our biological instinct to reproduce, coupled with the release of chemicals to induce romantic feelings and ultimately bond with a partner.
this is not a societal thing, men are horny and always will be, obviously i won’t speak for all but it’s just down to instincts it’s been around for along as we have, saying otherwise is cope.
personally, i feel very strongly for all my friends. i've mistaken strong feelings for romantic feelings before, but then i had some time to think about what love meant for me and that gave me a better understanding of love in the end. so yeah no, vulnerability and having deep conversations results in strong feelings but those feelings doesn't necessarily mean it's romantic.
what helped u figure out what love meant for u? i’ve been struggling to figure out bc i also feel very strongly for all of my friends but am not sure how to diffrentiate
@@allisonwang4561 this is probably not the answer you want to hear, but in my experience it's different for everyone. And this is coming from someone who also is very much still searching. I think it comes down to understanding how you define romanticism for yourself. For some, sexuality is a big part for others it's not. For some spending a lot of time together is really important, for some that's not what's important. In the end love and appreciation will always bleed into each other, but the barrier of what is romantic love and what isn't is something you have to define yourself. Try things out. Maybe looking up the love languages is a good starting point.
@@allisonwang4561 I can tell you what real love is if you're still interested? Because it's actually a fairly simple concept to understand although most people will go their whole lives not knowing what it is.
If you stopped seeing everyone of the opposite gender as a potential partner solely for that reason, maybe you'd realise guy-girl friendships can be deep and remain fully platonic
Thisss. It’s so hard cause since I was a girl, every time ID have a guy friend the adults around me would ask me about my new ‘boyfriend’. Still getting out of that mentality
@@amyerwin4314 my mom so ingrained in my head that every male is out to get you romantically and will do something bad to you that I can't even talk to one 💀
Guy-girl friendship is possible. My friends consist of guys and gals but it's all platonic. It's pretty fun when all of you are mature enough to know that romantic love is not the only kind of love. We discuss deep stuff and ask each other for advice; always looking for each other's back. They're my family. I love them fr
It’s only possible in a group. Notice how you said plural. As a group, you become a family unit. But as one man and one woman becoming a unit, well, the Bible even says they become one flesh lol
@@disguisedcentennial835 nah, pretty easy one on one. i used to think i was different but really, people are just immature. if you can't understand your feelings and the feelings of others around you well enough to maintain a platonic friendship of someone you're attracted to, you have to grow up. that's some highschool shit, no two ways about it
@@osvelitnope. That can happen if you are not as around that person too much, as you won’t get attached in the same extent as if you consistenly talk one on one with that person. This happens in any kind of relationship, not only guy-girl ones.
Why can't you find someone attractive but also choose to be just friends and nothing more? You should be able regulate that and not overstep into wanting a romantic relationship.
Yes and even IF you catch feelings for a friend and choose to overcome them, they will vanish on their own if you don't feed them and prefer the person as a friend.
I have guy friends! And the secret is quite anticlimactic - you both just don’t find each other attractive😅 As a person, yes, as a partner, no. Simple!
I think the wise part of this is recognizing that you can get over the incredibly awkward period of unrequited crush and stay friends, regardless of yalls genders/sexualities .
people who are obsessed with romantic relationships are also exhausting to be around. they tend not to value platonic friendship as much. it would be very sad to not have friends because you want a partner to fix your loneliness, then never or only depend on your friends bc you think you need a partner as a full time therapist.
Deeply desiring romance and valuing platonic relationships are not mutually exclusive. We can walk and chew gum at the same time. If I express obsession over books, sports, TV, video games, social media, and travel, no one bats an eye. But if I express a longing for marriage and family, I'm doing too much. Absolute insanity 😑
Absolutely, and it's so frustrating. People treat "let's just be friends" as some kind of rift impossible to overcome, but what's wrong with just being friends? Is it truly so incomprehensible for a guy to spend time with a woman whose company he clearly enjoyed enough to consider a romantic partner if the promise of sexual gratification is no longer there? To a lot of guys it is, they completely push away any woman who doesn't want to date them and then go on Reddit to complain about "entitled females" and "male loneliness epidemic".
@@raidenvakarian9362 Opposite sex friendships can and do work. But for a guy to constantly hang out with a female friend is not a good use of time or energy. And I'm not just saying that from a capitalist or patriarchal perspective.
People need to realize that "deep feelings" ≠ romantic feelings. Yes, you can develop deep and profound appreciation, love and respect for someone, but that doesn't mean it's romance! People nowadays are so lonely that any connection deeper than surface-level is automatically assumed to be romantic. You need more than just a close romantic partner, you also need close platonic friends, mentors, siblings etc.
Uhh yeah you can TRY to rationalize it with your mind and think that makes sense. But the fun thing about feelings is that they aren't rational. Just because you think deep and romantic aren't similar and that in theory it is perfectly plausible to foster platonic friendships with the other sex, doesn't mean it will play out that way. We are instinctive creatures, and our primal parts decide for potential mates, not our ideological thinking. You can only work with the feelings that you get. You can decide to suppress those feelings, divert them, or let them wash over. You only decide what to do with those feelings. You cannot stop them from beginning in the first place.
This doesn't take into account that not everyone is straight, lol. My best friend is a girl and so am I. I'm attracted to women and I was also attracted to her. But the reason we're friends and best friends is because we both recognized that what we needed from each other was not romantic but platonic. It was about respecting her, for me, and valuing her as a person. The moment you see them as a person and not just a potential romantic partner, you can absolutely be friends, even between a guy and a girl.
The reason behind that is because the birth rate is in decline. Young people aren't getting married or having kids so, when the older generation dies, there are not enough young people to replace them. These are some of the factors that cause state collapse.
The thing about guy-girl friendships is that, if you dont set up some kind of border, it could potentially make one develop feelings for the other. Some of the comments think its ridicoulous but, what essentially seperates a friend and a partner is that one is intimate and the other is not. Its totally plausible to develop feelings for the other person so unless you want a chance of that to happen or you really trust your friend, its better to set up some kind of border.
I think this is more about societal expectations that force men and women who are both attracted to the opposite gender and friendly with each other to have a romantic relationship because that’s what’s expected of you at a certain age in today’s society. You might mistake purely platonic feelings for romantic, especially if you’re young and inexperienced with dating, or pressured into it by friends or family.
I'm bi and have both male and female friends. I only ever had feelings for one of the girls. The solution, I think, is not trying to see literally everyone as a potential partner, otherwise I'd never be able to have platonic friendships. Straight people sound weird some times lol
Rightttt, if that logic was true to everyone, bi and pan people would weep (it's already hard enough to know that gender isn't what's stopping us from finding love, it's all the rest ;-;)
Literally this. I had crushes on all my friends at some point (very early on in the friendship) but that eventually gave way to something I think is more precious and wonderful. And sometimes I think it wasn't even a crush, but just a deep appreciation for who they were as people.
They aren't seeing every person as a potential partner, only the really close friends that they built a deep connection with? Why do you think the solution there is to stop considering everyone a partner or that that is even what is going on? You could ignore the majority of people as partners and still fall in love with a super close friend that you spend a lot of time with and have deep convos with
as a straight guy with several close female friends who i regularly call to talk about personal deep stuff this genuinely makes no sense 😭 if you view people as people rather than their gender and sex you can be friends with anyone
me and my first guy friend bonded because I was being bullied, and he was one of the only ones to talk to me. it was very deep. but none of us ever had any feelings for each other. i miss him.
Yeah, its rare but I've had real friendships with men where there was nothing romantic. I think men who claim thats impossible are self-reporting and projecting.
As a bisexual person...I am simply just not attracted to my platonic friends in that way. I still can feel deeply for them but its just not romantic or sexual in any way.
The issue is that people don't understand that love can mean a lot of things. Caring for someone is also a form of love, and it is, in my opinion and experience, a normal and important part of a truly deep friendship.
I think the issue is that most guys know that they'd try, even if the girl is in a relationship and they're single. These situations work better when two people are very committed to their people. Makes anything weird happening less likely.
Seeing everyone of the opposite sex as a romantic interest is crazy, most of my closest friends are girls and im a guy. The one im closedt with i helped through a reslly really bad issue she had with a guy and a lot of people see how close we are are either surprised we arent dating, ask if we are, or say we should. But we both know that wouldn't work and consider the other as a brother/sister
This is based in social conditioning. Not all of us view life as a playground for mating otherwise why give us sentience. I have never hung out with men thinking they had anything to offer me in such a way. Cringe.
Literally. 1. obligatory bisexual 2. my boyfriend literally was more attractive to me BECAUSE he had friendships with girls he saw as people not objects or conquests.
Idk as someone autistic, who has been oblivious one too many times to a dude developing feelings for me, I have found it easier to just do without male friendships for an indefinite period of time… But the rules in the video seem pretty good 😅 kind of went this way when some guy I was infatuated with mainly kept me in his life as an option after rejecting me 😆 But yeah I’ve had too many situations I didn’t read correctly or ended up accidentally hurting someone that it just seems easier to stick with the girls 😊
I’m bi. I have friends of all genders. The key is to see them as people rather than as potential partners, bc then you aren’t seeing them for who they are, you’re looking for how they can complete you
This. I think it also might be the fact that they're becoming more vulnerable with each other as the friendship progresses and they automatically equate that sort of intimacy (with someone of the gender they're attracted to) with romantic attraction. I'm pan and had crushes on all my friends when we were first starting out. But then again, I was young and desperate for the kind of love you see in the movies. Now I think it was less of a crush and more of a deep appreciation for them as people.
@@storywhatifs Yeah man, attraction does happen, but you aren’t controlled by your hormones. You always have a *choice* to either act on the feelings the hormones give you or not. It’s the difference between humans and animals (edit: spelling)
I had the same situation, talking to each other is indeed very important for keeping your relationship healthy and strong, no matter what it turns into or where it stays.
My best friend of over a decade is of the opposite gender from me and the closest we've ever gotten to one of us catching feelings was in freshman year of high school when she asked me out primarily because its what she thought she was "supposed" to do. Truthfully neither of us ever found ourselves physically attracted to each other and even if we did we know we want and need very different things in a romantic relationship. And I'm the one she comes to for most of her relationship advice because I understand her anxieties (and her horrible taste in partners) better than anyone and we almost never have conversations that arent deep on at least some level.
As a straight women one of the biggest red flags I find in both men amd women is if they say men and women cant be friends. Very weak minded. I need intelligent funny good hearted people in my life, so they dont make the cut
@@Ghostface__x_ Incorrect. My ex was not desired by many women and I loved that he had more female friends than male because it was an indication of how easy he was to talk to. The guy I’m currently seeing is desired by some women and he has two female best friends, at least one of whom has admitted she is not attracted to him.
The nice thing about feeling is that you don’t have to act on them! If you develop feelings for your friend and you know they won’t be reciprocated, they can just stay feelings. As long as you don’t obsess over them, the feelings will fade.
I can't relate. I'm the complete opposite. I act on them because if i don't, I find myself not sleeping, not focusing on work or studies, thinking of nothing but if said person also has some feelings for me.
This has the same energy as those insane "Situationship" povs yall gotta realize it aint that deep not everything is about romance and relationships just let people love and care about eachother the way they wanna and if you develop feelings just by opening up to someone thats on you it has nothing to do with guys and girls being friends.
It is possible but especially difficult when you are both young and single. I’d go so far as saying it’s damn near impossible unless you grew up together since you were small children.
yeah it’s weird to me as a bi person. i have male and female friends and i’m not attracted to any of them. i’ve had “crushes” on friends in the past but then i realized that i just felt loved and appreciated by them and there actually weren’t romantic feelings going on lol (i have a history of being/feeling left out or unloved/unappreciated)
most of this comment section is women. obv they wouldnt want guys that they dont find attractive to be interested in them. and more generally heterosexual sex is a hassle for women. its not that men and women cant be friends, but the way we bond is both different and our sexualities are different
you're the one being truthful@@nyar9649, letting everyone know you can't control the horny symbal monkey in your brain telling you everyone could be a mate. I think I got over that before highschool
The question itself is stupid because it's loaded: The answer is either: - all guys and girls can be friends - no guys and girls can be friends. The reality is of course that every person has a different view on relationships and attraction. The real lesson is that we should be considerate that we are all different kinds of sexual romantic beings, and not be affraid to be transparent about it if we think it's necessary for one's own and others well-being.
@@Synlo oh no, not everyone who is friendly. They usually have to form a genuine bond 1st. I'm only speaking from a guy's perspective, but a lot of times, the qualities we look for in girlfriends/wives can be found in friends who are girls. The only real difference is that some of them can ignore those feelings, but you're not really friends if you're friendzoned.
I've had my best guy friend since elementary school. Everyone expected us to get together, but we never did. Turns out I'm a lesbian and he helped me come to terms with it. He did catch feelings, but we cried and hugged it out. He started dating someone not that long after. We're adults, and even though we don't see each other as often, we're still good friends and have had a million of deep conversations and experiences together. I have some great male online friends, and we often devolve into deep talks. It's really a shame how we look at male/female friendships. I don't think someone catching feelings or it evolving into a relationship nullifies the validity of it at all.
i have a close guy friend. we’ve never been attracted to each other and i can say that for a fact. we’ve talked about crushes, trauma, our futures. completely platonic and an amazing friendship.
bruhh. I'm going through this exact thing right now. I know she's into me, she's staying up 4 extra hours to talk to me and falling asleep on the phone. personally don't know if I can commit because long distance is impossibly hard.
I was ranting to my friend about how only one guy has ever liked me and she said that she used to and I said "Oh cool, that's 2 people then" and moved on. How is it different for opposite gender and same gender friendships?
@@fangsuigetsu5 same lol my boyfriend has this kind of thinking and told me he would leave if i ever tried developing a male friendship and that it was my fault not to develop friendships before the relationship. I see people as just people and even mentors nlt as potential partners or sexual mates to begin with, but he has this way of thinking and i am trying to come to terms because as an introvert and a passionate learner i want to have a learning community and friends to discuss and experience hobbies :(
I would say all strong friendships involve a bit of infatuation to some extent and that often makes someone immediately think *crush* but infatuation and interest in your loved ones is a natural part of developing a deeper connection. That's why a lot of people keep it surface level, it's difficult to navigate that infatuation phase without wanting to act upon curiosity and the societal expectation of romance etc. Often once you get past that little friend crush phase I'd say 70℅ of the time you just feel stronger friendship but if you do have feelings for them now you've taken the time to process them and see if you can even maintain friendship as usual or not.
@@truebezzy12if every human decided to obey their primal instinct, everyone would just be murdering each other. There's a reason we as a species go against our own primal instinct.
@@truebezzy12 but what if he's ugly but fun to be friends with, and he thinks I'm ugly but fun to be friends with? How do you want to mate with every ugly funny girl you meet?
@@jamieboer3466 .............. What? Your body...isn't wired...to differentiate friendship and romance? Everyone just wants to bang their best friend? If that were the case, then how would straight or gay people exist?
Maybe because you can have both at the same time? If I’m friends with someone I’m romantically attracted to I can still care about them as friends, but I also want to be more than that.
Friendships should be valued for the emotional connection, not just the potential for romance. It's important to recognize and appreciate platonic love in our lives.
Naah, you can make really deep and thoughtful conversations without romantic stuff. If you need to love person in a romantic way to share your feelings, well it's almost impossible to be friends with anybody.
Guys, we just simply need to not view people as potential partners and problem solved! Applying this concept to other areas of my life has done wonders for me. I conquered my fear of grizzly bears, as I simply stopped viewing them as a potential threat. I now choose to see them as fellow earth dwellers; we’re all children of the earth!
You all are nuts. Talk to people, they're people. Make connexions. Someone has feelings? Talk about it. Process it. Move on from the feelings or act on them as appropriate.
You don’t get it. If a man finds a woman is attractive and realizes they have a good connection, he probably wants it to develop it to an intimate relationship because why not? For some reason, women don’t look at their male friends as romantic interests as men do but I think it highly relies on physical attraction. This is why men and women who are attracted to each other can’t be friends.
For most guys, you can have sex with a girl and not catch feeling and still be friends, but I wont be a deep emotionnal relastionship. If I start bounding with a woman emotionnally, I'll start being attached and by doing so I wont be as attracted to other womens as much. Because they are feelings you cant control
“It’s not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages” - F. Nietszche Friends can exist anywhere but for love, attraction and commitment/sacrifice to not ‘break’ a friendship is the real challenge.
as a gay man, I have been friends with so many men who I found insanely attractive. Not ONCE did I ever think of them of anything more than just aw theyre pretty, nor did I ever fall in love with them. Maybe just don’t treat every single person you meet as something to sexualize/romanticize? Yall are weird lmao. You can be friends without ever catching feelings with the sex you’re attracted to. And they don’t have to be someone you find unattractive.
gay people exist also, which sounds very cringe but it is quite relevant to the generic ass question of whether or not friendship between different sexes can exist
@@purplewine7362only you are offended by people being gay it seems. They where just mentioning that for example 2 gay guys can be friends the same as a straight woman and a straight man can be friends without wanting romance
@@chAlicesx that's funny because from the comment section it's obvious who's offended that their alphabet wasn't represented in a youtube shorts skit Also, my comment in no way implies that I'm offended by gay people existing. your tactic to put words into my mouth failed.
@@purplewine7362 firstly, average brainless homophobe (you just so you know :) ) secondly, they werent offended if you had any kind of empathy u would realize that.
yep, to me the deep meaningful stuff is for your life partner. And your friends are there to be there for you when you're are in trouble or just to have fun
I'm a straight girl with a straight guy friend. I thought he was cute when we first met, but we've never had anything more than friendship. And we're very open with each other so I know he's not hiding feelings, he has a girlfriend and I'm interested in someone else. I think it depends on you as people. He and I know there's no way we would ever date and it feels wrong, so we never think about it.
@@TheStepmonkey Can you stfu and stop sounding so lonely. I swear other people who are desperate for a relationship ruin everything between a perfectly fine friendship.
I have multiple guy friends, even a guy best friend. My only rule is that we stay just friends, there's obvi going to be no flirting or romantic type of stuff, but we can still have kinda deep convos
this is straight up crazy. Im bi and have male and female friends, I feel zero romantic attraction to them so why tf would gender matter, not every person is a potential love interest thats so weird
You may not have romantic feelings for them but THEY might develop som depending on how deep of a connection I could become. In my case for exemple, I have a girl as a friend, that I really respect for the person she is and her values. I do not see her as a romantic interest because she is in a relationship. But I always tell myself shes the type of person I need in a relationship. If she was single and interested, I would try to date her, BECAUSE I really respect the person she is.
@@Dwarf_Enjoyer you might respect her as a person but you definitely don’t respect her as a friend. But at the same time thinking men and women are so fundamentally different that they can’t be friends is straight up crazy
I can't understand why do you have to fell in love with the opposite sex if you have meaningful friendship with them. How having a different genitals affect you so much
Difference in biology between the genders. As you probably already know women are naturally more selective than men and statistically find 80% of men below average in attractiveness. This is not the same for men. You cannot control emotions, its all biology - genetics and hormones. You can pretend to be a friend with someone you have a crush on but that doesnt change that you still have a crush on them. its not a choice. difference genders different worlds
I can't understand how you view someone of the opposite gender as both attractive and a great friend and not think "I want more of them in my life, dating would be great"
I will never understand the girls and guys can’t be friends thing. Last time i checked, and i could be wrong here so fact check me…. We are just people.
My best friend and I have been friends for twelve years. We have talked about some awkward shit. Deep shit. We know everything about one another inside and out and where we thought once we might want more, we shared one kiss to see and both of us were violently uncomfortable. Men and women can definitely be friends and just friends
I’m bisexual and this just happened to me… with a girl. Head over heels and I had no idea. Sometimes this just happens… doesn’t mean you can’t be friends with the gender you’re attracted to 💀
Men and women can be just friends. It is possible but depends entirely on the individual. You have to establish and know ahead of time what you wish to be friends for. There are many basis to relationships other than sex. It is dependent on your mindset. You know who you feel comfortable with working with. Trust your gut.
I saw something about how me fundamentally view women as objects or as beings that exist only to tend to their sexual, emotional, or romantic needs. Which is why men struggle to view vulnerability or emotional connection with a woman as simply platonic because they’re conditioned to believe that that’s reserved for romantic partners. I don’t really get it tbh.
This is partially true, but misses some points. Men do not fundamentally view women as objects, but both women and men are conditioned to believe that certain emotions or actions are reserved only for romantic interests. This doesn't reflect reality, which is why people have so many issues with navigating relationships.
I think something also very importent that ppl have to take into account is that boundries are importent. ive been friends whit my best friend for eleven years or so. we know where we stand in our frienship and i doubt that it's goung to change any time soon. also ignoring what ppl say about the friendship bc i have this one friend who just doesnt understand that me and my best friend can be just friends
The problem isn’t that one friend catches feelings, rather it’s that one friend usually has trouble settling boundaries and the other has trouble respecting them. For me it was being an emotionally supportive friend because I thought that’s what friends were supposed to do, only to be accused of “trauma dumping” for having the audacity to expect some measure of reciprocity.
"Politeness has become so rare that people mistake it for flirting"
- John Wick
I have far to many people mistake me for just being an all around nice person for me being interested
@@akitoshiezumiYikes nice guy detected
@@Thekillzone64 haha, no. And I’m a girl :3
@@Thekillzone64Careful with protecting. Course, I'm guilty of that myself for posting this. Takes one to know one.
we have simply abandoned platonic love too much
Platonic love is valuable and beautiful ♥️
AS AN AROACE PERSON THIS IS SO REAL
Just for the sake of asking and getting other people's take... what's the difference?
But how does it feel different?
i want a friend 😌
The Greeks had 8 words for love. Love isn’t lust and love isn’t just romantic.
Exactly.
In Arabic there's 17 words for different kinds of love yet we use only one.
Agape, storge, eros, phileo… what are the others?
@@sirfailalotful What do these ones mean?
And we aren't ancient greeks....
Romantic comedies have done irreparable societal damage
You think human romance being such a prevalent thing is because of rom coms? Are you dense?
@@ozymandias949 you’re coming to conclusions off of one passing comment and applying a whole narrative that is not in anyway in line with the core comment without asking a question that isn’t leading to suit your own narrative to suit your preconceived notions to satiate your need to be right? Are you dense?
@@HipHopParadox interesting how you didn't add any context to your supposedly misunderstood comment. You are dense.
@ozymandias949 you're just insulting people and not even attempting to elaborate what they could do better, bruh. Letting your ego delude you into a false sense of superiority based on the preconception of someone else's knowledge on a topic, in which you are equally as far from having a complete understanding as the other person, is only going to make you more upset at people. So why bother?
@@ozymandias949you watch too much rom coms
bisexuals: “skill issue”
I love this😂
FR THO
FR
HAHAHAH FRR LOLLL
Was about to say that 😅
society has conditioned people into being so wholly obsessed with romantic relationships we no longer understand the value of platonic love or even what it can be.
Exactly 👏 not every gender you are attracted to means romance…you can form other relationships that are non-romantic. Who knew! 😆
Stop blaming society
@@magniskylol I hope you know if a guy just wants to be friends with you he is not attracted to you at all but he just sees you as a nice person, if he is attracted to you either he will shoot his shot or do things for you so that you notice
Yes society did this. It couldn’t have anything to do with our biological instinct to reproduce, coupled with the release of chemicals to induce romantic feelings and ultimately bond with a partner.
this is not a societal thing, men are horny and always will be, obviously i won’t speak for all but it’s just down to instincts it’s been around for along as we have, saying otherwise is cope.
personally, i feel very strongly for all my friends. i've mistaken strong feelings for romantic feelings before, but then i had some time to think about what love meant for me and that gave me a better understanding of love in the end. so yeah no, vulnerability and having deep conversations results in strong feelings but those feelings doesn't necessarily mean it's romantic.
what helped u figure out what love meant for u? i’ve been struggling to figure out bc i also feel very strongly for all of my friends but am not sure how to diffrentiate
@@allisonwang4561the comfortably to have sec.
Fr
@@allisonwang4561 this is probably not the answer you want to hear, but in my experience it's different for everyone. And this is coming from someone who also is very much still searching.
I think it comes down to understanding how you define romanticism for yourself. For some, sexuality is a big part for others it's not. For some spending a lot of time together is really important, for some that's not what's important. In the end love and appreciation will always bleed into each other, but the barrier of what is romantic love and what isn't is something you have to define yourself.
Try things out. Maybe looking up the love languages is a good starting point.
@@allisonwang4561
I can tell you what real love is if you're still interested?
Because it's actually a fairly simple concept to understand although most people will go their whole lives not knowing what it is.
AROMANTICS : LMAO
literally me just standing in a corner 🧍
Demiromantics crying rn (including me) 💀
Demiromantics crying rn (including me) 💀
@@T13GUY What's demiromantic
@MILOPETIT Basically someone who has to be friends for a while and get a deeper connection before they have romantic feelings
If you stopped seeing everyone of the opposite gender as a potential partner solely for that reason, maybe you'd realise guy-girl friendships can be deep and remain fully platonic
It would also probably improve your relationship as you wouldnt be dating out of proximity, but instead an actual romantic connection.
Exactly.
Thisss. It’s so hard cause since I was a girl, every time ID have a guy friend the adults around me would ask me about my new ‘boyfriend’. Still getting out of that mentality
This‼️‼️
@@amyerwin4314 my mom so ingrained in my head that every male is out to get you romantically and will do something bad to you that I can't even talk to one 💀
As a lesbian, y’all sound crazy
Thank you
Facts, I'm bi and dont have this problem. Straight people are bad with boundries or smth
That's something you can't experiment so ofc
@@nenokedoken885wdym
@@nenokedoken885 what
Guy-girl friendship is possible. My friends consist of guys and gals but it's all platonic. It's pretty fun when all of you are mature enough to know that romantic love is not the only kind of love. We discuss deep stuff and ask each other for advice; always looking for each other's back. They're my family. I love them fr
looking out for each other's back*
It’s only possible in a group. Notice how you said plural. As a group, you become a family unit. But as one man and one woman becoming a unit, well, the Bible even says they become one flesh lol
@@disguisedcentennial835 nah, pretty easy one on one. i used to think i was different but really, people are just immature. if you can't understand your feelings and the feelings of others around you well enough to maintain a platonic friendship of someone you're attracted to, you have to grow up. that's some highschool shit, no two ways about it
@@osvelitnope. That can happen if you are not as around that person too much, as you won’t get attached in the same extent as if you consistenly talk one on one with that person.
This happens in any kind of relationship, not only guy-girl ones.
I’m sick of this debate yes men and women can be friends. End of discussion
No, they cannot.
@@shrekkek9396 They can, but far from the bound 2 normal guys can have
ITSS NOT THAT EASYY 😡😤😤
Correction you can't. Emotionally mature people can.@@shrekkek9396
Men are too desperate
Why can't you find someone attractive but also choose to be just friends and nothing more? You should be able regulate that and not overstep into wanting a romantic relationship.
Yes and even IF you catch feelings for a friend and choose to overcome them, they will vanish on their own if you don't feed them and prefer the person as a friend.
@@justme4037REAL REAL IVE BEEN SAYIN THIS SM
Because why wouldn't you want to be something more with someone who's attractive and makes a good friend, isn't that what you want in a partner anyway
A primal human instinct is to have intercourse it’s very difficult to push that instinct back especially for young adults
@@brightcloud4847 Because friendships tend to last longer than relationships. If its over you loose a partner and a friend.
I have guy friends! And the secret is quite anticlimactic - you both just don’t find each other attractive😅
As a person, yes, as a partner, no. Simple!
Yup. That's my dynamic with men I have as friends too.
+1
Yes idk if these people realize that getting attracted to every person of the opposite gender is not normal 💀
@@Th3Visitor Literally!
Yup! And it’s a choice to not be with them
I think the wise part of this is recognizing that you can get over the incredibly awkward period of unrequited crush and stay friends, regardless of yalls genders/sexualities .
people who are obsessed with romantic relationships are also exhausting to be around. they tend not to value platonic friendship as much. it would be very sad to not have friends because you want a partner to fix your loneliness, then never or only depend on your friends bc you think you need a partner as a full time therapist.
Deeply desiring romance and valuing platonic relationships are not mutually exclusive. We can walk and chew gum at the same time. If I express obsession over books, sports, TV, video games, social media, and travel, no one bats an eye. But if I express a longing for marriage and family, I'm doing too much. Absolute insanity 😑
Absolutely, and it's so frustrating. People treat "let's just be friends" as some kind of rift impossible to overcome, but what's wrong with just being friends? Is it truly so incomprehensible for a guy to spend time with a woman whose company he clearly enjoyed enough to consider a romantic partner if the promise of sexual gratification is no longer there? To a lot of guys it is, they completely push away any woman who doesn't want to date them and then go on Reddit to complain about "entitled females" and "male loneliness epidemic".
@@raidenvakarian9362 Opposite sex friendships can and do work. But for a guy to constantly hang out with a female friend is not a good use of time or energy. And I'm not just saying that from a capitalist or patriarchal perspective.
@@duncansiror5033 So, would you say that constantly hanging out with a MALE friend would be a better use of his time and energy?
@@raidenvakarian9362 Not necessarily. If it's excessive, it could also be a distraction from other parts of life.
As a straight girl, y’all crazy.
Just don’t see them as a potential partner.
See them AS AN ACTUAL FRIEND.
Choose: ‼️🍕v.🍔‼️
But think about it what if you actually catch feelings by hanging out with them it happens
@@BringMeTheMonkeys???
@@InvalidUser..
Well it happens ofc and it’s cute to catch feelings but saying a guy and a girl can’t be friends is straight up immature
@@_TiredMotherfucker_ yes
People need to realize that "deep feelings" ≠ romantic feelings. Yes, you can develop deep and profound appreciation, love and respect for someone, but that doesn't mean it's romance! People nowadays are so lonely that any connection deeper than surface-level is automatically assumed to be romantic. You need more than just a close romantic partner, you also need close platonic friends, mentors, siblings etc.
I disagree they go hand in hand.
Platonic love and romantic love are very different.
@@jamieboer3466 true romantic feelings will always be deep but not all deep feelings will be romantic please make a mental note of that
@@Dinosaur-hd2ms lust isn't a deep feeling m8
Uhh yeah you can TRY to rationalize it with your mind and think that makes sense. But the fun thing about feelings is that they aren't rational. Just because you think deep and romantic aren't similar and that in theory it is perfectly plausible to foster platonic friendships with the other sex, doesn't mean it will play out that way.
We are instinctive creatures, and our primal parts decide for potential mates, not our ideological thinking.
You can only work with the feelings that you get. You can decide to suppress those feelings, divert them, or let them wash over.
You only decide what to do with those feelings. You cannot stop them from beginning in the first place.
As a straight dude, y'all are insane.
Yeah I've always thought the topic was dumb, but i think this mini sketch was so well-written and adorable and the music was nice. Omg
Most relationships start off as friendships that should tell you enough
This doesn't take into account that not everyone is straight, lol. My best friend is a girl and so am I. I'm attracted to women and I was also attracted to her. But the reason we're friends and best friends is because we both recognized that what we needed from each other was not romantic but platonic. It was about respecting her, for me, and valuing her as a person. The moment you see them as a person and not just a potential romantic partner, you can absolutely be friends, even between a guy and a girl.
exactly!
imagine that, seeing a person as a person not smone that can offer you smthn
Exactly. Heteros are always chasing romance and sex then wondering why their life is miserable.
One of you did develop some feelings for some period
Its about girls and guys not about lesbians or gays? They made the video specifically about girls and guys being friends.
i genuinely thought this concept would be left behind in elementary school
Lol. Elementary school was the ONLY time I was able to be friends with girls.
@@edwardmitchell6581Skill issue
@@edwardmitchell6581skill issue
@@edwardmitchell6581sad
@@edwardmitchell6581 skill issue
Maybe if everyone wasn't pressured to have sex all the time we would get along better.
The only reason animals get along is to have sex.
Agreed ✨
The reason behind that is because the birth rate is in decline. Young people aren't getting married or having kids so, when the older generation dies, there are not enough young people to replace them. These are some of the factors that cause state collapse.
The thing about guy-girl friendships is that, if you dont set up some kind of border, it could potentially make one develop feelings for the other. Some of the comments think its ridicoulous but, what essentially seperates a friend and a partner is that one is intimate and the other is not. Its totally plausible to develop feelings for the other person so unless you want a chance of that to happen or you really trust your friend, its better to set up some kind of border.
And then you get people saying platonic cuddling works. Different strokes I guess.
this has huge r/arethestraightsok energy lmao
IKR.
I read aesthetic straights, just thought you should know okaybyee!
That's what I was thinking! What do they think pans and bis do ? Fall for and have no friends?
I think this is more about societal expectations that force men and women who are both attracted to the opposite gender and friendly with each other to have a romantic relationship because that’s what’s expected of you at a certain age in today’s society. You might mistake purely platonic feelings for romantic, especially if you’re young and inexperienced with dating, or pressured into it by friends or family.
Better than being sexualy immoral at least
I'm bi and have both male and female friends. I only ever had feelings for one of the girls. The solution, I think, is not trying to see literally everyone as a potential partner, otherwise I'd never be able to have platonic friendships. Straight people sound weird some times lol
Rightttt, if that logic was true to everyone, bi and pan people would weep (it's already hard enough to know that gender isn't what's stopping us from finding love, it's all the rest ;-;)
Totally lol. We can't control attraction but we can choose to ignore it because we value the person as a friend rather than a potential partner.
Literally this. I had crushes on all my friends at some point (very early on in the friendship) but that eventually gave way to something I think is more precious and wonderful.
And sometimes I think it wasn't even a crush, but just a deep appreciation for who they were as people.
They aren't seeing every person as a potential partner, only the really close friends that they built a deep connection with? Why do you think the solution there is to stop considering everyone a partner or that that is even what is going on? You could ignore the majority of people as partners and still fall in love with a super close friend that you spend a lot of time with and have deep convos with
Why did you objectify that one person?
as a straight guy with several close female friends who i regularly call to talk about personal deep stuff this genuinely makes no sense 😭 if you view people as people rather than their gender and sex you can be friends with anyone
As a guy I can confirm my friendship did not survive 😭
It's good, man. Experience is what matters, don't focus on the bad things, you'll find your person one day.
me and my first guy friend bonded because I was being bullied, and he was one of the only ones to talk to me. it was very deep. but none of us ever had any feelings for each other. i miss him.
Yeah, its rare but I've had real friendships with men where there was nothing romantic. I think men who claim thats impossible are self-reporting and projecting.
Reach out to him ! I am sure he would love to reconnect as well!
@@nobitanobi3475 yeah i’m sure :)
@@my.fav.no..is.12.point.9Heyy, did you reach out to him? :)
@@my.fav.no..is.12.point.9 i wish you the best of luck! i just reached out to an old friend i missed a few days ago and it went well
As a bisexual person...I am simply just not attracted to my platonic friends in that way. I still can feel deeply for them but its just not romantic or sexual in any way.
same, its hard for me to even imagine anything beyond a platonic relationship with my friends
comment section
girls: you can have friendships without love
boys: no you can't
The issue is that people don't understand that love can mean a lot of things. Caring for someone is also a form of love, and it is, in my opinion and experience, a normal and important part of a truly deep friendship.
boys dont have double standard most of the time
As a guy, you can have friendships without romantic love.
I think the issue is that most guys know that they'd try, even if the girl is in a relationship and they're single. These situations work better when two people are very committed to their people. Makes anything weird happening less likely.
Seeing everyone of the opposite sex as a romantic interest is crazy, most of my closest friends are girls and im a guy. The one im closedt with i helped through a reslly really bad issue she had with a guy and a lot of people see how close we are are either surprised we arent dating, ask if we are, or say we should. But we both know that wouldn't work and consider the other as a brother/sister
This is based in social conditioning. Not all of us view life as a playground for mating otherwise why give us sentience. I have never hung out with men thinking they had anything to offer me in such a way. Cringe.
fr I’m getting tired of this
Literally. 1. obligatory bisexual 2. my boyfriend literally was more attractive to me BECAUSE he had friendships with girls he saw as people not objects or conquests.
Idk as someone autistic, who has been oblivious one too many times to a dude developing feelings for me, I have found it easier to just do without male friendships for an indefinite period of time…
But the rules in the video seem pretty good 😅 kind of went this way when some guy I was infatuated with mainly kept me in his life as an option after rejecting me 😆
But yeah I’ve had too many situations I didn’t read correctly or ended up accidentally hurting someone that it just seems easier to stick with the girls 😊
It's based on human biology
@@jamieboer3466no, it’s based on people befriending people that they’re clearly attracted to.
*stares in ace*
literally. this is incomprehensible
Asexual people can still find people attractive and develop romantic feelings though. They just probably don't wanna sex them 😅
Yup
Yeah we know you exist bully for you
@RankaZer0 Bridge moss and grass aren't the same thing. Come back after reading a self-help book at the park. And maybe take some vitamin d...
My best friend is a man, the bestest friend.
Yall grew up with romanticism so much, y'all forgot platonic love exists.
As a straight man with several female friends and a girlfriend who's chill about it, ya'll need to grow up. It ain't that deep.
In summary, they’re only friends if they both find each other unattractive 😂
Attractive, but undesired
I’m bi. I have friends of all genders. The key is to see them as people rather than as potential partners, bc then you aren’t seeing them for who they are, you’re looking for how they can complete you
This. I think it also might be the fact that they're becoming more vulnerable with each other as the friendship progresses and they automatically equate that sort of intimacy (with someone of the gender they're attracted to) with romantic attraction.
I'm pan and had crushes on all my friends when we were first starting out. But then again, I was young and desperate for the kind of love you see in the movies. Now I think it was less of a crush and more of a deep appreciation for them as people.
not true at all you can't control hormones whether i wanted it or not after seeing my best friend in a particular dress i couldn't stop my feelings
@@storywhatifs Yeah man, attraction does happen, but you aren’t controlled by your hormones. You always have a *choice* to either act on the feelings the hormones give you or not. It’s the difference between humans and animals
(edit: spelling)
You definitely can get over that awkward moment! I’ve done it, but it really depends on you both being good communicators.
I had the same situation, talking to each other is indeed very important for keeping your relationship healthy and strong, no matter what it turns into or where it stays.
My best friend of over a decade is of the opposite gender from me and the closest we've ever gotten to one of us catching feelings was in freshman year of high school when she asked me out primarily because its what she thought she was "supposed" to do. Truthfully neither of us ever found ourselves physically attracted to each other and even if we did we know we want and need very different things in a romantic relationship. And I'm the one she comes to for most of her relationship advice because I understand her anxieties (and her horrible taste in partners) better than anyone and we almost never have conversations that arent deep on at least some level.
As a straight women one of the biggest red flags I find in both men amd women is if they say men and women cant be friends. Very weak minded. I need intelligent funny good hearted people in my life, so they dont make the cut
No one cares if you see it as a red flag.
@@TranceCore3ooh the edgelord has something to say! Is this your first power trip on the internet?
I agree with this. If I date a guy, I would find it very suss if he doesn’t have female friends.
@@zsofiasejno it's because you want a guy that is desired by other women
@@Ghostface__x_ Incorrect. My ex was not desired by many women and I loved that he had more female friends than male because it was an indication of how easy he was to talk to. The guy I’m currently seeing is desired by some women and he has two female best friends, at least one of whom has admitted she is not attracted to him.
The nice thing about feeling is that you don’t have to act on them! If you develop feelings for your friend and you know they won’t be reciprocated, they can just stay feelings. As long as you don’t obsess over them, the feelings will fade.
Yep just don't act on any feelings ever, and then stay alone forever because talking to girls is a problem regardless of the current situation.
@@TraxisOnTheLines what?
In my experience, the feelings only get worse the more time I spend around said person. Can't relate unfortunately
I can't relate. I'm the complete opposite. I act on them because if i don't, I find myself not sleeping, not focusing on work or studies, thinking of nothing but if said person also has some feelings for me.
This has the same energy as those insane "Situationship" povs yall gotta realize it aint that deep not everything is about romance and relationships just let people love and care about eachother the way they wanna and if you develop feelings just by opening up to someone thats on you it has nothing to do with guys and girls being friends.
It is possible but especially difficult when you are both young and single. I’d go so far as saying it’s damn near impossible unless you grew up together since you were small children.
i’m a lesbian and i have female friends, it doesn’t seem difficult to just separate romantic and platonic relationships?
yeah it’s weird to me as a bi person. i have male and female friends and i’m not attracted to any of them. i’ve had “crushes” on friends in the past but then i realized that i just felt loved and appreciated by them and there actually weren’t romantic feelings going on lol (i have a history of being/feeling left out or unloved/unappreciated)
Let’s be truthful, so you’ve never caught feelings for any of your friends?
@@nyar9649one time when I was in 4th grade, lmao. U truly see anyone as a romantic partner?
most of this comment section is women. obv they wouldnt want guys that they dont find attractive to be interested in them. and more generally heterosexual sex is a hassle for women. its not that men and women cant be friends, but the way we bond is both different and our sexualities are different
you're the one being truthful@@nyar9649, letting everyone know you can't control the horny symbal monkey in your brain telling you everyone could be a mate.
I think I got over that before highschool
The question itself is stupid because it's loaded:
The answer is either:
- all guys and girls can be friends
- no guys and girls can be friends.
The reality is of course that every person has a different view on relationships and attraction.
The real lesson is that we should be considerate that we are all different kinds of sexual romantic beings, and not be affraid to be transparent about it if we think it's necessary for one's own and others well-being.
Also it totally ignores age differences. A 16 year old boy can be best friends with a 70 year old woman and everyone would know it's platonic.
If you keep catching feelings for anyone you get remotely close to, you have a serious issue
Well, yeah, it's usually called loneliness.
@@Lazyguy143 that doesn't excuse anything. Being lonely doesn't mean you'll automatically fall in love with everyone you get friendly with
@@Synlo oh no, not everyone who is friendly. They usually have to form a genuine bond 1st.
I'm only speaking from a guy's perspective, but a lot of times, the qualities we look for in girlfriends/wives can be found in friends who are girls.
The only real difference is that some of them can ignore those feelings, but you're not really friends if you're friendzoned.
I've had my best guy friend since elementary school. Everyone expected us to get together, but we never did. Turns out I'm a lesbian and he helped me come to terms with it. He did catch feelings, but we cried and hugged it out. He started dating someone not that long after. We're adults, and even though we don't see each other as often, we're still good friends and have had a million of deep conversations and experiences together. I have some great male online friends, and we often devolve into deep talks. It's really a shame how we look at male/female friendships. I don't think someone catching feelings or it evolving into a relationship nullifies the validity of it at all.
the lesbian + gay friendship dynamic laughing in the corner
…or should i say in the closet
This is the best comment in this comment section
@@rosahettinga7248 aw ty
LOLLL
i have a close guy friend. we’ve never been attracted to each other and i can say that for a fact. we’ve talked about crushes, trauma, our futures. completely platonic and an amazing friendship.
He probably imagined his life with you and 4 kids a million times already, with butterfly's in his stomach Everytime you touch
Just letting you know, no guy will want you having a close friend
@@rudolfschell5142 this might be projecting
@@Ghostface__x_good, repels the immature jealously away. 🤣
That's false
bruhh. I'm going through this exact thing right now. I know she's into me, she's staying up 4 extra hours to talk to me and falling asleep on the phone. personally don't know if I can commit because long distance is impossibly hard.
So long as both parties have the emotional intelligence and boundaries yeah, men and women can be platonic towards one another.
I was ranting to my friend about how only one guy has ever liked me and she said that she used to and I said "Oh cool, that's 2 people then" and moved on. How is it different for opposite gender and same gender friendships?
…are the straights okay? this is so weird to me
right! that's the first thing that i thought of as well lmaooo the straights are clearly not okay 🙃
They're really not, they're struggling
Lmao 😂😂😂
Dude I’m straight this video is concerning 😭😭😭😭
@@fangsuigetsu5 same lol my boyfriend has this kind of thinking and told me he would leave if i ever tried developing a male friendship and that it was my fault not to develop friendships before the relationship. I see people as just people and even mentors nlt as potential partners or sexual mates to begin with, but he has this way of thinking and i am trying to come to terms because as an introvert and a passionate learner i want to have a learning community and friends to discuss and experience hobbies :(
I would say all strong friendships involve a bit of infatuation to some extent and that often makes someone immediately think *crush* but infatuation and interest in your loved ones is a natural part of developing a deeper connection. That's why a lot of people keep it surface level, it's difficult to navigate that infatuation phase without wanting to act upon curiosity and the societal expectation of romance etc. Often once you get past that little friend crush phase I'd say 70℅ of the time you just feel stronger friendship but if you do have feelings for them now you've taken the time to process them and see if you can even maintain friendship as usual or not.
That's cool but anyone know the name of the BGM??
It kinda slaps
Song name is swimming
By flawed mangoes
@@ozi-g-bethank u!!!!!!
What the hell💀💀💀💀
This is so funny. I can't imagine seeing everyone of the opposite sex as f-mates.
How? We were designed to mate. You saying that you can’t imagine “everyone” means you do imagine it but you rule them out.
@@truebezzy12if every human decided to obey their primal instinct, everyone would just be murdering each other. There's a reason we as a species go against our own primal instinct.
@@truebezzy12 but what if he's ugly but fun to be friends with, and he thinks I'm ugly but fun to be friends with? How do you want to mate with every ugly funny girl you meet?
@@truebezzy12 Expecting every other person in the opposite gender as a potential partner is the issue.
I struggle to understand why so many allo people can't differentiate between friendship and sexual or romantic attraction.
Because your body isn't wired to differentiate them.
@@jamieboer3466 ..............
What?
Your body...isn't wired...to differentiate friendship and romance? Everyone just wants to bang their best friend? If that were the case, then how would straight or gay people exist?
@@jamieboer3466yes it is. Do more research. Humans are social creatures
Maybe because you can have both at the same time? If I’m friends with someone I’m romantically attracted to I can still care about them as friends, but I also want to be more than that.
Friendships should be valued for the emotional connection, not just the potential for romance. It's important to recognize and appreciate platonic love in our lives.
Platonic love is a thing. Sincerely, a woman with platonic love for her male best friend.
Yep, people need to understand that "love" can mean a lot of things, and you can have love in friendships
As a bisexual woman i guess i cant be friends with men or women . Sad days 😂.
Naah, you can make really deep and thoughtful conversations without romantic stuff. If you need to love person in a romantic way to share your feelings, well it's almost impossible to be friends with anybody.
Guys, we just simply need to not view people as potential partners and problem solved! Applying this concept to other areas of my life has done wonders for me. I conquered my fear of grizzly bears, as I simply stopped viewing them as a potential threat. I now choose to see them as fellow earth dwellers; we’re all children of the earth!
Song is Swimming by Flawed Mangoes
thank you so much 😭
consider: the gays
Fellas, is it gay to have friends?
@@minimushrooomis it straight to have friends?? Work both ways
Consider: your siblings and family. These people don't think..
You all are nuts. Talk to people, they're people. Make connexions. Someone has feelings? Talk about it. Process it. Move on from the feelings or act on them as appropriate.
You don’t get it. If a man finds a woman is attractive and realizes they have a good connection, he probably wants it to develop it to an intimate relationship because why not? For some reason, women don’t look at their male friends as romantic interests as men do but I think it highly relies on physical attraction. This is why men and women who are attracted to each other can’t be friends.
If this is true, why won’t my wife let me talk to my ex girlfriends?
@@ilikepancakes2368"You don't get it." Because it doesn't make sense. 💀
conexion that @SharpnessYt reference
For most guys, you can have sex with a girl and not catch feeling and still be friends, but I wont be a deep emotionnal relastionship. If I start bounding with a woman emotionnally, I'll start being attached and by doing so I wont be as attracted to other womens as much. Because they are feelings you cant control
“It’s not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages” - F. Nietszche
Friends can exist anywhere but for love, attraction and commitment/sacrifice to not ‘break’ a friendship is the real challenge.
As an aro/ace, yall are hopeless crazies
I went to the psychologist because of my overthinking and even I never overthought friendship this much in my life
as a gay man, I have been friends with so many men who I found insanely attractive. Not ONCE did I ever think of them of anything more than just aw theyre pretty, nor did I ever fall in love with them. Maybe just don’t treat every single person you meet as something to sexualize/romanticize? Yall are weird lmao. You can be friends without ever catching feelings with the sex you’re attracted to. And they don’t have to be someone you find unattractive.
Its different cuz you're gay. Not to sound mean, its just that the mentality is different
They always fall for us 😂
Who's "they"?
This is literally my experience every time. Its so true and real 😭. I wish it wasn't but this is just how it is :/
Stfu you’re 14 this is insanely dumb content
gay people exist also, which sounds very cringe but it is quite relevant to the generic ass question of whether or not friendship between different sexes can exist
are you offended that a 30-second sketch didn't include EVERY PART OF THE SPECTRUM?
@@purplewine7362holy shit, you are so stupid man
@@purplewine7362only you are offended by people being gay it seems. They where just mentioning that for example 2 gay guys can be friends the same as a straight woman and a straight man can be friends without wanting romance
@@chAlicesx that's funny because from the comment section it's obvious who's offended that their alphabet wasn't represented in a youtube shorts skit
Also, my comment in no way implies that I'm offended by gay people existing. your tactic to put words into my mouth failed.
@@purplewine7362 firstly, average brainless homophobe (you just so you know :) ) secondly, they werent offended if you had any kind of empathy u would realize that.
You don't need to have deep meaningful conversations to be friends, you can be friends for a number of different things
yep, to me the deep meaningful stuff is for your life partner. And your friends are there to be there for you when you're are in trouble or just to have fun
This is really spot on! I won’t go into details but this is really spot on. Some people only understand showing concern and friendship to be romantic.
To become friends is better than most things, but to become lovers is the best. ❤
I'm a straight girl with a straight guy friend. I thought he was cute when we first met, but we've never had anything more than friendship. And we're very open with each other so I know he's not hiding feelings, he has a girlfriend and I'm interested in someone else. I think it depends on you as people. He and I know there's no way we would ever date and it feels wrong, so we never think about it.
For now...maybe in the future it will change 🤷♀️
@@TheStepmonkey
Can you stfu and stop sounding so lonely. I swear other people who are desperate for a relationship ruin everything between a perfectly fine friendship.
@@TheStepmonkeydude....
@@TheStepmonkey Not to be mean, but if her friend is unatractive to her, I dont see how there could be feelings.
This is so stupid and sad. I’ve had male friends for many years and this has never happened. Also, this limited mindset perpetuates heteronormativity.
Ye but are the friendships deep? And are you really sure they don’t have any feelings?
Good for you... any guy friend that I ever had ended up seeing me as his potential partner... but hey, at least now I know.
anyone that seriously uses the term "heteronormativity" should be banned from ever speaking again because heterosexuality is literally the norm
Yes it did, they just never said it and you're a bi-
@@nomenenimipsumloquiturwhy else do you think they should waste their time on someone as worthless as you?
The awkwardness fades. Real friendship can survive that shit
A theif once said “everyone steals”
I have multiple guy friends, even a guy best friend. My only rule is that we stay just friends, there's obvi going to be no flirting or romantic type of stuff, but we can still have kinda deep convos
this is straight up crazy. Im bi and have male and female friends, I feel zero romantic attraction to them so why tf would gender matter, not every person is a potential love interest thats so weird
You may not have romantic feelings for them but THEY might develop som depending on how deep of a connection I could become. In my case for exemple, I have a girl as a friend, that I really respect for the person she is and her values. I do not see her as a romantic interest because she is in a relationship. But I always tell myself shes the type of person I need in a relationship. If she was single and interested, I would try to date her, BECAUSE I really respect the person she is.
@@Dwarf_Enjoyer you might respect her as a person but you definitely don’t respect her as a friend. But at the same time thinking men and women are so fundamentally different that they can’t be friends is straight up crazy
@@lynn-Ryo I do respect her as a friend? I wouldnt be her friend otherwise?
@@Dwarf_Enjoyer you obviously don’t because you don’t wanna be her friend you wanna be her partner which is a huge difference
@@lynn-Ryo Nope, im just saying I wouldnt mind if the occasion occurs. And I am not TRYING to be her partner to be clear, its a huge difference.
As a guy I can be friends with a girl when I consider her a sister that I can lean back on ✌🏽 solid way
Asexuals be damnd
I can't understand why do you have to fell in love with the opposite sex if you have meaningful friendship with them. How having a different genitals affect you so much
Difference in biology between the genders. As you probably already know women are naturally more selective than men and statistically find 80% of men below average in attractiveness. This is not the same for men. You cannot control emotions, its all biology - genetics and hormones. You can pretend to be a friend with someone you have a crush on but that doesnt change that you still have a crush on them. its not a choice. difference genders different worlds
1. Because you wont ever have a meaningful friendship without eventually falling in love if you dont have a partner.
2. Its not just the genitals.
@@microwave1135 I'm bi. Does that mean I won't ever have a close platonic friendship without developing feelings?
@@notemu1764 What sex are you? Hormones have a lot to play into this.
I can't understand how you view someone of the opposite gender as both attractive and a great friend and not think "I want more of them in my life, dating would be great"
I will never understand the girls and guys can’t be friends thing. Last time i checked, and i could be wrong here so fact check me…. We are just people.
People you want to f*ck and have intimate relationships with. I just love how you make it sound so simple when it isn’t.
My best friend and I have been friends for twelve years. We have talked about some awkward shit. Deep shit. We know everything about one another inside and out and where we thought once we might want more, we shared one kiss to see and both of us were violently uncomfortable. Men and women can definitely be friends and just friends
Its hard to see someone you find attractive and not have the thought of "yeah id sleep with them" flow through your mind at least once
I’m bisexual and this just happened to me… with a girl. Head over heels and I had no idea. Sometimes this just happens… doesn’t mean you can’t be friends with the gender you’re attracted to 💀
Men and women can be just friends. It is possible but depends entirely on the individual. You have to establish and know ahead of time what you wish to be friends for. There are many basis to relationships other than sex. It is dependent on your mindset.
You know who you feel comfortable with working with. Trust your gut.
Please set boundaries guys! 😭
I saw something about how me fundamentally view women as objects or as beings that exist only to tend to their sexual, emotional, or romantic needs. Which is why men struggle to view vulnerability or emotional connection with a woman as simply platonic because they’re conditioned to believe that that’s reserved for romantic partners. I don’t really get it tbh.
This is partially true, but misses some points. Men do not fundamentally view women as objects, but both women and men are conditioned to believe that certain emotions or actions are reserved only for romantic interests. This doesn't reflect reality, which is why people have so many issues with navigating relationships.
Me a guy with a mostly female friend ship grop
: Skill issue
That's gay my boy. Imagine being so bad at being a man that you have to try to fit in with women
🏳️🌈
@@eebbaa5560or he’s normal
That’s either because you are gay, don’t find any of your friends attractive, or they just don’t find you attractive.
@@eebbaa5560 fellas is it gay to have a friends
sometimes i mistake affection for attraction and it ruins all my frienships
I'm a boy and tbf with male friends the conversations stay surface level anyway lmao
as a bisexual aromantic... wth are you saying lol
I think something also very importent that ppl have to take into account is that boundries are importent. ive been friends whit my best friend for eleven years or so. we know where we stand in our frienship and i doubt that it's goung to change any time soon. also ignoring what ppl say about the friendship bc i have this one friend who just doesnt understand that me and my best friend can be just friends
The problem isn’t that one friend catches feelings, rather it’s that one friend usually has trouble settling boundaries and the other has trouble respecting them. For me it was being an emotionally supportive friend because I thought that’s what friends were supposed to do, only to be accused of “trauma dumping” for having the audacity to expect some measure of reciprocity.
Instead of trying to make our female friendships platonic why are we not trying to make our male friendships more sexual? Take the greekpill.
His voice sounds so good