i’ll never forget when i was getting my photo taken and the photographer said “okay now let’s do some serious ones” and i went from this 😄to this😐in a split second, and the photographer literally said “woah” out loud. just another fun little day of masking
Funny, I had a friend in middle school that looked at my 6th grade picture and said, "Your expression just looks so forced." I was actually sort of stunned when I heard that. Sure, this was the first time I'd changed schools, and I learned rather quickly that I didn't really fit in with my peers, so it could be chalked up strictly to having a poor school experience. But some years later, when I looked back at all these pictures I had to pose for, I realized...they all looked??? forced??? in different ways??? And I specify ones that I had to pose for because my mom loves to take candid pictures of people-and those in which I'm experiencing pure joy without realizing she's taking a picture...didn't look forced. Because I wasn't masking. Since then, if I'm taking my picture or having my picture taken (which honestly isn't often anymore), I've started to feel out if I'm feeling over-expressive or under-expressive and what facial expression I feel I can do at the moment as a result. Pictures turn out much better that way.
The first one made me think about how I was wearing ear defenders in the hallways of my high school (which is a private, Catholic, “all-girls” high school) and my teacher told me it was a “safety issue”, then proceeded to say that I could only wear them during tests and stuff like that, which sucks because the hallways are so fucking loud at a high school. like teenagers are literally so fucking loud. One time, while I was in the cafeteria, I heard a girl behind me smack the table and yell “no way!” for something her friend said. God, it’s unbearable sometimes.
Uuugh that first one hit deep for me. I've never worn noise-cancellers (though I do often wear my earphones in with nothing playing because it just feels comfortable and like a sense of control to have them) but the supervisor/manager's tone of voice...ugh it sounds JUST like something a teacher at my high school would say. It's so patronising and I don't even realise it's wrong because I'm so used to being addressed that way in institutions. My mind just automatically/reflexively takes it as truth and goes "Yep, sigh, that's normal. Too bad so sad, I guess I'm not allowed to have any dignity."
I relate to this so much, for some reason, it’s a thing at my school to randomly start clapping during lunch. Some kids will start, and it will spread until the entire cafeteria is clapping, stomping, banging their hands on the table, etc. It happens all too often and I hate it so much, and my headphones aren’t noise cancelling, so I have to sit there with my hands over my ears staring directly down at the table trying to to cry. I hate people so much.
I get hyperempathy a lot and one of the times I feel it the worst is just watching shows with embarrassing scenes. They hurt so bad to watch that I genuinely just avoid them at all costs. Although its the worst when I identify more with a character.
Second hand embarrassment is a killer to me. I cannot do it. I will predict the shenanigans and cover my eyes with my fingers and ears with my thumbs. If it goes on too long then the show goes off and I'll probably never watch it again. I'm not willing to go through cringing at all that everytime I remember the rest of the show.
I wrote a paper on the double empathy problem and relevance theory in relation to autism and I think it’s so important to the understanding of autism and a step away from all the theory of mind conceptions that can be really stigmatizing. I highly recommend looking into it!
@@rambunctiousvegetable I think its an under-researched concept in general. I just find it interesting and am glad that alternative views of autism are being looked into. I don't really know any other autistic people so I can't say if I relate to it. Hopefully more focus will be given to all levels of autism in future research!
@@rambunctiousvegetable Hey, not to be ironic, but want to understand deeper: Could you clarify what part(s) of your communication are some degree of "bad"? I, too, have had plenty of miscommunications, misunderstandings, and arguments with other autistic people to the point where I question if I'm actually autistic or not (I'm self-diagnosed right now; waiting on evaluation). But I'm definitely autistic from what I can tell, and I do have my fair share of all of those things with neurotypicals also. A lot of people would probably use an overall level of functioning for me of a 1 (I say that because I'm not really a firm believer in overall and static functioning levels/labels for autism, as it seems to not work that way?), but I would personally say my communication averages at 2. I can easily shoot to 3 when you throw emotional dysregulation into the mix. I may go nonverbal to where I literally have to pry my lips and teeth open to speak verbally or literally have to push myself to type, my brain may shut down and have me catatonic, I may need to go from a verbal conversation to a written one or use visual aids because I can't hold all the information in my mind to work with (but my visual processing might also shut down)...and it's very hard when I go through these things and other autistic people think that I'm just being difficult or trying to be manipulative. So I'm not sure about the overall functioning level, but I think you're on to some aspect.
@@rambunctiousvegetable Going to come back at a later point to respond to the entire thing, but wanted to at least thank you for explaining more clearly how support needs levels work and what language to use around the social deficit part. A large part of it is that I haven't had some things explained to me very clearly and haven't had much practice with explaining, so I feel like I'm clumsily explaining my experience when it comes to that. I'll have to take some time to integrate that information into my understanding and figure out my thoughts/opinions from there. EDIT: I meant levels, not labels
The ghosting your friends thing reminds me of my dad. Him and his best friend both travelled a lot for work, literally would only see each other a few times a year and would never call or message each other between that. One of them would just be like, "oh hey I'm gonna be in the area next month for work, can I stop by your house?" and when they would see each other they would just hug, head out to the patio or living room to talk and pick up right from where they left off like they had seen each other just the day before.
35:27 I relate to this so much! My mom is trained in assisting "special needs" kids (she's an assistant director at a preschool), and she wasn't able to identify my autistic traits as autistic. I also think she might be autistic as well because a lot of autistic traits I have I've put off as, "Oh, that's just genetic because my mom does the same thing".
@@noiseforautism its ok i just thought I would point it out to help you and keep from confused people like me when it first happened. Its ok though. I don't mind it.
oh my gosh finally somebody talked about the tight clothing thing!! I always described it as liking my clothes to feel "secure." I don't want tight clothes all the time, but the pressure can help me feel grounded. It makes it hard to shop for clothes sometimes because something that's comfortable for me in one situation could be uncomfortable in another, and every clothing brand for autistic people focuses on making everything soft and smooth.
I just got a vivid memory from when I was about 8 or 9 years old. I remember getting in trouble with my teacher because she caught me eating a piece of paper. At the time, I had a habit of eating my pencil erasers and stabbing my big white eraser with my pencil during class. I even used to nibble on my pen caps sometimes. So, I was sent to a councilor and my mother was there with me. I don't remember much from the conversation, but I do remember the councilor asking why I was eating paper in class. I didn't really know why I was doing it, but I knew that people eat things when they're hungry, so I said it was because I was hungry. My mother asked me why I didn't just wait until lunch time. I said I don't know. The councilor said that I was doing it to get attention. My mother asked me whose attention I was trying to get because I already had hers. I said I didn't want attention. And especially not negative attention. The councilor didn't believe me. She said that negative attention was the type of attention I got. I don't remember anything else after that, but I never ate paper in class again. I still ate and stabbed my erasers though.
It's disheartening reading how many people were f'd over by school counselors & or by counselors & psychologists in general who are/were hired bc they're supposed to know how to help, but they do the opposite. 😟
Damn. I don't remember getting in trouble for it, mostly just kinda called out--but I did a lot of those things. Loved making designs in the eraser with my pencil and making my own connect the dots.
it's the way we all stabbed our erasers as kids though lol. why is this such a common experience for autistic ppl?? it's just like. mmm. textuuure. satisfyinnng.
I'm so glad I'm not in middle school and high school anymore because the noise levels of just... People talking in class, all at the same time, while I was trying to work, were SO overwhelming and I ended up in tears from the stress of masking (without knowing I was masking), sensory overload, and all the other stuff affecting my mental wellbeing. I had people witness my meltdowns when I cried from the noise and some stood up for me, while others ostracized me for being "too senstitive". Im in university now, and bc of lots of stuff (including the global pandemic) I've spent the past the last 3 years in virtual classes... And I'm scared to go back in-person. I have no idea if I'll be able to handle it
39:38 made me have to stop and cry. That one really hit home for me. I used to think I “grew out of” my meltdowns because I used to have fits of anger as a child but I don’t anymore, but really I’m just very repressed. I just cease to function. What he describes is so similar to how I feel when things pile on, and I have felt so guilty for years because I couldn’t do it. All these things felt so minor and I felt awful because I should just be able to get on with it but instead I just couldn’t do anything but crawl into bed and let one of my cats lean against me. I hope he’s okay. I hope you are all okay. Protect yourselves.
One of my earliest memories growing up was wanting to be where people were talking and things were lively, but not necessarily wanting to interact in that environment. I liked being around family but sometimes it was a lot to process. So often times I would sit or lay somewhere, close my eyes, and just focus my energy on my surroundings. By slowing down and not moving much- aside from maybe some fidgeting with my hands or feet. I could hear things a lot clearer. I also felt a lot happier and relaxed. I recall watching the lights in front of my eyelids change or darken when someone moved in front of a light. I remember the sound of someone getting off the rocking chair. Sometimes during doing this I would fall asleep, but mostly I just remember letting people think I was asleep. Interestingly, it wasn't until looking back that I even realized that's what I was doing. I just knew it was one of my favorite things to do. Unfortunately... this coping would extend to a lot of things later in life. I would go into that ''idle'' mode, even without purposely doing so. Making me forgetful, communicate less, and sometimes just confused. While I know I had some meltdown-like (??) moments in my childhood. I think the reason why I didn't /don't have them as much of as is associated with autistics, is that I am MUCH more likely to shutdown than meltdown. It's like instead of my brain firing a bunch of signals, it just goes ''alright shut'er down boys''. That said, the times I did meltdown (later on in life) was when I was forced to be present while in shutdown mode. If I try to push past it, It's like the switch is flipped and I'm visibly and/or verbally freaking out instead.
I am currently reading the book that he's talking about and I have cried several times. Just realizing that no adults in my life saw that I needed help. It's so obvious looking back.
I got my son diagnosed and this journey has made me self diagnose. Helping my son is like helping my small self. This video is healing and triggering at the same time but I’m so happy I’m understanding myself more. I used to hate myself and thought I was odd. I suffered and silence and masked so much I can’t recognize my natural self.
First of all, I'm so glad there was mention of AFAB people with autism. I'm trans and potentially autistic and it always socks when people talk about women with autism and men with autism cause I never know where I fit medically in that case. Second of all, I have a weird mix of hyper empathy and a complete lack of empathy, so it's refreshing to hear about that from an actual neuroscientist. I had a therapist who told me I couldn't be autistic because I was too empathetic, even though I display a lot of symptoms and traits. She also said I was too well adjusted to be autistic when I'm 23 years old and have learned to mask a variety of things quite well. I'm hoping to find a therapist that actually knows what they are talking about one day haha.
I'm a transmasc autistic and you're practically describing me. My first therapist, who saw me when I was perhaps 21, was extremely dismissive of me. It took until when she accused me of being "dramatic and attention-seeking" during a session where I cried from trying to speak while nonverbal for me to realize she'd been dismissive the entire time. She said to me what your therapist said about you, and that hurts. You didn't deserve that. When I got diagnosed at 23, I went to a place that specialized in Autism diagnosis and had a diverse clientele (because I'm not white). There, it was a lot smoother. If you can, try to find a specialist or an office that specializes in Autism, and see if they're reviewed well by more than one demographic. I hope you find the support you need. 💜
well, I'm not offering new information but I recommend finding an autistic specialist, because whether you're trans or not a trained individual should be able to spot masking when its present.
@gengarfluid Identifying as transmasc is completely normal for an autistic female. It's caused by being unable to mask and cope with patriarchal abuse of females. Your therapist abused you for being female.
In addition to Gregory I also feel like Jacob is autistic as well. He loves to info-dump and can't tell when people are getting fed up with him 🤣, misunderstands social cues and situations (like when Janine was having a row with her sister and he thought it was about the board game they were playing) and his dedication to making sure that he does the best for his students, coworkers and Abbott. In one of the episodes Gregory didnt get the point about having work acquaintances (either we're friends or not) and small talk but Jacob is overly friendly to the point of smothering. I love him and Greg together and it's funny that the next vid is abt autistics getting along with each other better than neurotypicals
Yeah I don’t even remember what thirsty feels like anymore. Sometimes I say I’m thirsty (very rare maybe once a month) and I stop for a minute like that’s it! Thirsty!
@@Damned_afterall I almost never feel thirsty. o: I have to force myself to drink water, otherwise I'd probably be on death's door. When I was a teenager, I drank water maybe a few times a year. xD
@@neoniceSometimes, yes. As with all diagnoses it’s a matter of scale. What neurotypical people don’t do is avoid making meals nearly every day because the task paralysis and sensory blocks to get over in order to acquire food are so huge that the effort feels insurmountable. They don’t struggle to feed themselves enough to survive on the regular/have recurring issues with malnourishment/form other health issues that spawn off of regularly not eating or drinking enough. I regularly get dents in my nailbeds from the periods where getting myself to eat is too much of a struggle. I have chronic urinary pain that came from years of ignoring/not noticing my thirst. Alexithymia is real, catatonia is real, autism is real. And even if everyone struggles with those things sometimes that doesn’t negate the existence of clinically significant rates of those problems.
22:42 this had me crying so hard. I can pin point the moment that ruined my mental health, and that was when I was talking to my mom about being bullied at school and having her tell me that 'maybe if you stopped talking about pokemon then people would treat me better.' and for years ive spent hiding my special interests, to the point that Ive become ashamed to even take part in them in private. like im doing something wrong by being excited, and that my passion is a dirty secret. im trying hard to unlearn these feelings and its slow going, but its nice to remember that im not alone.
I once explained autism to someone in the sense that, for everything a neurotypical thinks of someone with autism, people with autism probably think the same thing about neurotypicals. So if typicals think we are annoying, well chances are autistic people find typicals annoying! If a typical thinks autism has unique qualities, well autism most likely feels the same too about typicals. Its odd because for all the misunderstanding there is, we do on some level understand each others general nature. And that alone is enough to stary a spark, good or bad.
I personally don’t feel like this is entirely true. As an autistic person, I do find neurotypical people challenging in certain ways, but I don’t generally react to them in the same way that they react to me. (I’m not trying to imply that one side is “worse”. The specifics vary based on the situation, too much so to generalize.) To give one example of what I mean: There is a decent chance that a neurotypical person will find autistic mannerisms strange and inexplicable, if they aren’t familiar with autism and/or haven’t had much interaction with autistic people. On the other hand, most autistic people are accustomed to seeing neurotypical people and how they behave. Even if they lack an instinctive understanding of neurotypical communication, neurotypical mannerisms would be more likely to come across as “confusing, but not unusual” rather than “weird” in the eyes of an autistic person. This difference in perception may influence the way each person outwardly reacts to the other. However, I do think you’re right in some ways, and that this is a good perspective to consider, particularly to encourage people to rethink common generalizations. This is a tangent, but I hope that “typicals” does not become a common way to refer to neurotypical people. It sounds unkind.
First of all, the battle between the auto generated subtitles and the word naltrexone had me laughing so hard I was crying. I'm watching the video going "I really thought everyone did that." "Wow, I thought that was normal"..... "oh, um, I think I have an appointment to make."
I know right!? like if They said the actual reasons why They had that Things on Their Ears…. THEN ACTUALLY LISTENING TO THAT SAID REASONS,YA DIPSHITS BEFORE YOU MADE PEOPLES HATE YOU BECAUSE YOU DON'T LISTEN TO THE PERSON TELLING YOU THE SAID REASONS!!!!
17:42 Never related harder; I do this to family and friends and it isn’t because I don’t care, it’s because I’m trying to sort a lot of things out or feel bad that all I have is bad news on my end. Than when things get better I think well I waited too long and don’t call even longer.
22:40 I relate to this so strongly that my heart hurts. I've had this happen so many times that I've taught myself to not get excited. I'm known in my family to not get excited when something they know I like is coming out.
Its a trauma response, I think Depending on the situation it could be either freezing (to avoid being attacked and rejected) or a fawning response (so that people don't get weird and dismissive) Or both Could be inward fleeing too. Finding others who have the same interest can be amazing
l've just come to terms with the fact my family gets annoyed. Luckily they don't do anything really bad I just force them to listen and slip in plants and Ninjago in every conversation lmaoo
a lil b4 21:47 yeah, my own therapist said i was low empathy bc idk how to react when someone was crying. Thats just bc of trauma that im still going through though, and bc of it i cant say that its said trauma for legal reasons (im still a kid yaknow) but being told i have no empathy when in on the verge of tears just from seeing someone cry really fucks me up
23:49 that was some thing I never realized before. I called my mom out on this all the time. I was recently talking to my mom about it ‘Hey, I think I have autism can I go get checked out or maybe just get diagnosed or something because I’m really thinking I have it.’ And I was expecting a bad reaction, right but I wanted to get it out of my system because it was just overwhelming my mind and I needed help contacting a doctor because I am awkward as fuck on the phone. So I asked and she was really OK with it and I was like hell yeah, this is going better than I thought maybe I was just freaking out for no reason and so I was talking to her more about it because I was understanding that she was receptive to the idea and what I was talking about and then midsentence as I’m explaining like why I think I’m autistic and getting ready to like dive deep in to the topic she turns to me and just starts talking about my niece, saying how proud she is that she finally started to talk and like my whole brain just short circuited and I looked at her and I and I got upset but I let her finish talking about whatever it is she wanted to talk about that was so important. And it wasn’t because I’m literally in the group chat where all of this information was shared. And then I turned to her and I said ‘hey, I’m very upset that you did that’ and she said ‘what? what did I do?’ and I said ‘that you rudely interrupted me when I was talking about some thing that was very important to me. I did not appreciate it, and I think you were very extremely rude at that moment.’’ And she was like I wasn’t rude, I just don’t wanna talk about it and I was like ‘OK then tell me you don’t want to talk about it don’t just ignore what I’m saying unvalidate me, and then move on at your own pace. Because that destroys me and makes me feel less in every sense.’ But she didn’t understand that. And just kept goingand moved on the topic because she didn’t want to talk about it anymore. 😤
O.O I feel so seen. I am 30 years old. I go through a lot of daily frustrations, my stim is rubbing my socks to the point of ripping them apart.... I hyper fixate on things as well.
Your unique needs and limitations deserve consideration and respect. But just believing you're autistic doesn't make you autistic. The word is more a billing category for insurance companies than it is a useful description of someone's subjective experience of their own mind.
you could be autistic! you might also want to look into other possibilities too like adhd, ocd, anxiety, etc since there can be a lot of overlap in symptoms :)
19:23 I am waiting on my results from my assessment, but this! This right here is probably my number one problem most days. I have to shower, eat something cause I'm shaky cause I forgot to eat the night before, and I have to do dishes. Well, I have to do dishes before I can cook to eat something because all of the dishes are dirty. I also have to do the dishes before I take my shower because I always spill nasty water down the front of myself when I am doing dishes, but I have to wait at least an hour between doing the dishes and taking a shower, but then I figure out I have to do at least two loads of dishes, so I can't take a shower right away but still have to wait for the hot water to come back before I can run the dishwasher again, and while I'm going through all of this in my head I'm feeling more and more lightheaded from low blood sugar and I need to eat now! But I literally have nothing to cook on or with, so I start doing dishes and get a headache so I have to stop cause I'm getting anxious. 6 hours later, I am sitting in the kitchen, still haven't eaten, the dishes haven't been done yet, and I still haven't taken a shower and now I have to put on my mask before my boyfriend gets home so he doesn't lose sleep or worry at work if I'm doing okay or not. I tell him "I'm just tired" and he accepts that most of the time. If he digs any deeper, I always end up sobbing uncontrollably because I wasn't good enough at hiding my issues, which was almost literally beaten into me as a child. 37:44 as well! I did that so muchin any crowded loud place!
Ahhhhhh! I'm pretty sure Quinni from HBH is actually an Autistic person. (Sarcasm) crazy how actually hiring Autistic people to play autistic characters results in accurate representation! lol
I JUST SPEND ONE HALF HOUR ON AN AUTISM QUIZ AND ANOTHER HALF HOUR ON ANOTHER ONE BOTH CLAIMED TO NOT COST ANYTHING THEY DID AND I CANT PAY I AM SO ANGRY RN
I'm sorry, I just had to pause-- That Tiktok with the video of a girl named Quinni having a meltdown-- THAT is a normal meltdown?! I've been having meltdowns?! Other people have this same response to things? I'm not just some freak who can't regulate my shit? I need a moment
I’m not autistic but have adhd and need a little music in my ears not loud but I help me concentrate and helps with background noise as well or I can’t do anything I get overwhelmed
22:45 Um yeah, uh.. I was in such a state of shock that I did actually cry like mentioned before in the video! I had never given this much thought before but yes, of course! I've had the exact same experience! It really just never hit me or hit home like that. Once I told my mom "I think I'm autistic" and she looked at me kinda wide-eyed. Does that mean she's scared of autistic people? Why? What else could that mean? How am I supposed to react to that? Do I acknowledge it? Anyways I'm trying to be more persistent and get a diagnosis. The main pushback I'm getting from my parents is, "Why do you think you need one?" "If you got one, how would it help?" And I honestly don't know how to answer that !! Does anyone have ideas?? Sorry for the tangent, by the way ^^" Edit for a grammatical error !!
I think it helps validate and heal a lot of things that happen to you. Like when you know and someone else confirms that was autism. It just makes life easier to understand and find coping mechanisms. Also, if you were diagnosed, do know there are negatives. You should look into what its like to have a disability, disclosure laws, etc. You will legally be classified as disabled.
@@noiseforautism Thank you for helping to put things into words! I also thank you for guiding me on where to look negatives-wise. I always knew there were negatives, but once you actually want to look into things, it becomes a somewhat daunting task. Grazie grazie !! ♡☆
Also, human beings simply like classifying things. The hope would be that we can be aware and intelligent enough to understand that labels do not describe a person, a thing, or a group in it’s entirety. Everything and everyone is multifaceted, complex, but having some kind of context is ok. But ya, from what I’ve heard there are positives and negatives to getting diagnosed, as with anything.
45:01 - 46:29 honestly reminds me of what might have happened in my past with some people. Not that people really said this, but I was just. . . it just reminds me of a lot of negative things that happened that I wish I would have had more control over, and I think I could've. But things were just... so hard. And just. . . I didn't understand myself and I don't think others supper did either. Not that Autism was on people's minds like ever. I wish I would've known myself better and done better . . .things could have turned out so differently. I don't know weather to give myself grace or continue to punish myself if I was in full control the whole time.
“Squishmallows are like crack for autistics” Not me staring at my enormous pile of Squishmallows (which also happens to be one of my special interests) as well as my (almost complete) collection of squishmallow trading cards (yes they exist, thank me later) as well as my squishmallow sticker collection and we can’t forget about the squishmallow croc charms! 😂 My favorite is Rosie if you were wondering 😅
16:00 im not even gonna lie, this genuinely made me cry. so far ive only seen myself have meltdowns, i dont think ive ever seen any of my friends or, anyone at all have an autistic meltdown. very very powerful stuff.
IF YOU HAVE "BROKEN WRIST SYNDROME", GET CHECKED FOR EHLER'S-DANLOS SYNDROME! cannot stress this enough! if you have it, you need to know as early as possible!
I don't believe a game of telephone is a great way to gauge social communication and/or cooperation on a grander and more complex scale. It seems very limited and facile. It does suggest to me, though, that you'd better have a mix of Neuro types if you want a funny outcome in telephone.
44:02 this one really hit me...i recently went to an electronic music open mic at a hackerspace with some friends, and it was basically in a garage/warehouse type place with everyone sitting on mismatched office chairs or standing around. at first, i was the only person who was walking around in the back getting distracted by all the other neat things in the space, and then, once a desk chair was available, i went and sat down and started vibing to the music...feet quietly tapping, chair lightly swiveling back and forth, leg bouncing, head bopping, etc. i glanced around a few times and nobody else was doing anything even close to that 😅 but idc, listening to live music is just so much better when i can feel it in my body
Don't remember if it was this video (commenting after i x'ed out the tab) but the fingers going in and out of my ears to change the noise input is very familiar to me. Didn't know others did it too lol
I definitely have issues with heat and cool and my hands and feet being cold. I thought it was lyme disease. When I was a kid I went hungry a lot because I couldn't eat what my family cooked. I raised myself from 14/15 after being kidnapped and having to get away myself anf deal with the whole aftermath myself, being a young mother pregnant at 16 whose baby dady was older and went to prison. I had to emancipate myself and get my own apartment. I never have haf anyone there for me people dont believe me when I tell them what I went through. I have been through severe situations and nobody helped if I called authorities they aldo didn't help and really made me afraid to ask for help in fear of recieving the opposite. I have never had anyone tell me about autism, now that I am learning about I now know my children are also autistic. And it just sucks seeing how little everyone cares and how badly we are treated and why.
44:19 I must rock back and fourth while my brain makes me a whole animated storyboard that I’m never gonna animate to that song I’ve listened to over ten times in a row Me to the Neurotypical kid who looks like SpongeBob and bullies me: *Hmmmmmmmmm* You can’t understand the Uber power of My Uber autism
I LOVE loop earbuds. They are a game changer for me. I work in a hospital on the floor where there is 1000 alarms at all times for literally everything. For 12 hours. I can hear the alarms. But they are not as...💢🤬😭😣
@@noiseforautism with the world like this I doubt it. Plus since I am in chemistry and hopefully molecular viology field I'll most likely meet some dangef at work. Kinda ideal for me. Going out by my own invention or research ir something like that
Omg 23 mins. Fuck yes this. Holy shit this is so freaking true. I feel this so much. Being tried to care but then no one caring about your special interest is the every day. And at around 40 minutes. That is so a shit thing to deal with and it just keeps happening and everyone acts like its a total shock and surprise. Nope its everytime. But people refuse to remember or care.
… well when I was a child I did used to move so hard to the music that my parents had to tell me to stop because shaking the entire car was making driving hard.
THank's for the trigger warning for showing a meltdown. I intentionally bit on my finger in a non harmfull manner toi be able to cope with that to not have a meltdown myself watching a played or true meltdown of someone else around 17:00
I was diagnosed in january of this year, I'm a teen, and I really hate airports. I bring an emotional support stuffed animal whenever I travel to keep myself regulated. If someone says "You are way too old to be carrying a stuffed animal" I would say. "Try spending a day in my shoes..." Another stereotype people make about me is that I have a lack of empathy. Ummmm...... I am a literal Empath. I can see your emotional Aura without even trying... It's so hard!😫
hey thanks for selling me on abbot elementary by putting that clip in there :v always assumed it was like the middle or another boring ABC show, THRILLED to have it make me laugh my ass off like it just did 😂
You know something I’ve learned that I think that I do but it’s a telltale sign that I could be autistic but I just never thought about it until this moment. When I am crying instead of feeling sad, which I normally am sad because I cry, but instead of thinking about the sadness I focus more on if I’m crying right. Like when I’m crying the thing that I’m thinking about the most is how my face is looking while I’m crying and why do I cry so weirdly. And the sadness is always second in these moments. I always thought that was just a normal, but I’m coming to the understanding that a lot of my thoughts are not normal. And I haven’t heard this one mentioned yet but I’m pretty sure this is like part of the thing.😂😅
Oh Woogity. 😑 I relate to the first thing SO much. People think I'm being crude and rude or disrespectful because I keep 💤 earplugs in most of the day... Especially in the car/truck. It's so helpful. ❤
45:28 It takes so much restraint not to become vulgar beyond words with the people too ignorant or flat out stupid to understand what neurodivergent and neurology actually is, like.... do those people think they're a tiny person in a mech suit making choices at a desk or something? Do they know how brain meat actually works their bodies not exactly them (I'm aware it's complicated) ooooh my fecking Filbert frying rice crackers.... it makes me so completely furious.
3:51 “Neurotypicals eat when they’re hungry” Not me currently avoiding food cuz everything sounds gross right now even though i last ate yesterday at noon.
I keep watching all these autism videos... I relate to 90% of them and I also have two daughters who are neurodivergent. I keep telling myself I'm not autistic...
This was me but with walking in my toes and saying because I wanted to be taller?and my mom thought I was making a joke or being a kid and silly, but no I just couldn’t handle putting my bare feet fully down on the cold hardwood floor 🫡 like I still can’t thinking about it rn makes me want to vomit or cry or both. Thank u for your comment. It really resonated with me and my childhood. I could also say I chewed on weird stuff. For me it was rubber so I’d ruin all my swim goggles (,:
I thought this was just some weird thing I do- but whenever I’m watching something, I subtitles. Like- holding back tears if they’re not on, but also not wanting to be a burden by asking to put the, on because people will need to take a minute out of their time to turn on subtitles and probably rewind the show/movie to watch what they missed while putting them on, and also sometimes the subtitles are big and people complain that they can’t see part of the screen. That’s something neurotypical people do? :D
48:42 "since I've been self medicating these past couple of weeks" Good Lord, please be careful, watching this, with self medicating with cannabis. Because of the huge overlap between autism and mental illness. If you have ever had any symptoms of psychosis, or have any first or second degree relatives who have schizophrenia or a psychosis related mental illness, Cannabis is probably a terrible idea, though it may take some time for that to become apparent. Please be careful!
Processing temperature: I’ve struggled with knowing how to dress for the weather and have always been amazed by people who appear to dress appropriately. It stresses me out! Like, how did you know to wear the lighter jacket today? Which is appropriate for the temperature and I’m in a heavy coat with gloves, burning up. 🙄
i never understood the "special interests" bit about autism. do people not have favorite shows or interests? what makes it different between those who are neurotypicals and those with autism/adhd?
My understanding is that NTs don't really talk about their interests to people who don't know anything about them. Like maybe a "I've been watching this new show, you should watch it" but thats about it. Meanwhile I find myself compulsively bringing up my special interests in unrelated conversations and the interest is like a part of my personality. Then again, I've seen a number of "neurotypicals" who make liking The Office their entire personality sooo
Intensity and longevity Its popular now and they talk about it, then move on to the next popular show and never mention the first one again? Neurotypical It hasn't been on the air for decades? They can quote which episode a 3 second clip os from? They use it to explain how they feel? Special interest.
Yes im so sorry! Ive been trying to figure out how to get them uploaded correctly but somethings weird with the encoder on my computer. But im working on it! And compiling more videos!
i’ll never forget when i was getting my photo taken and the photographer said “okay now let’s do some serious ones” and i went from this 😄to this😐in a split second, and the photographer literally said “woah” out loud. just another fun little day of masking
Funny, I had a friend in middle school that looked at my 6th grade picture and said, "Your expression just looks so forced." I was actually sort of stunned when I heard that. Sure, this was the first time I'd changed schools, and I learned rather quickly that I didn't really fit in with my peers, so it could be chalked up strictly to having a poor school experience.
But some years later, when I looked back at all these pictures I had to pose for, I realized...they all looked??? forced??? in different ways??? And I specify ones that I had to pose for because my mom loves to take candid pictures of people-and those in which I'm experiencing pure joy without realizing she's taking a picture...didn't look forced. Because I wasn't masking.
Since then, if I'm taking my picture or having my picture taken (which honestly isn't often anymore), I've started to feel out if I'm feeling over-expressive or under-expressive and what facial expression I feel I can do at the moment as a result. Pictures turn out much better that way.
wait so not everyone can do that
The guy talking about learning about ourselves making us cry as I’m still crying from the previous clip 😭
3:54 “Bro… neurotypicals eat when they’re hungry.” I’m being SENT 😂
The first one made me think about how I was wearing ear defenders in the hallways of my high school (which is a private, Catholic, “all-girls” high school) and my teacher told me it was a “safety issue”, then proceeded to say that I could only wear them during tests and stuff like that, which sucks because the hallways are so fucking loud at a high school. like teenagers are literally so fucking loud. One time, while I was in the cafeteria, I heard a girl behind me smack the table and yell “no way!” for something her friend said. God, it’s unbearable sometimes.
Yeah thats messed up. Doesnt hinder you or anyone so just doesnt make sense smh
Uuugh that first one hit deep for me. I've never worn noise-cancellers (though I do often wear my earphones in with nothing playing because it just feels comfortable and like a sense of control to have them) but the supervisor/manager's tone of voice...ugh it sounds JUST like something a teacher at my high school would say. It's so patronising and I don't even realise it's wrong because I'm so used to being addressed that way in institutions. My mind just automatically/reflexively takes it as truth and goes "Yep, sigh, that's normal. Too bad so sad, I guess I'm not allowed to have any dignity."
I relate to this so much, for some reason, it’s a thing at my school to randomly start clapping during lunch. Some kids will start, and it will spread until the entire cafeteria is clapping, stomping, banging their hands on the table, etc. It happens all too often and I hate it so much, and my headphones aren’t noise cancelling, so I have to sit there with my hands over my ears staring directly down at the table trying to to cry. I hate people so much.
Off topic but I love how all girls was in quotation marks
@@SnailTrailJay yeah, well, i know some people that are definitely NOT girls who go there sooo
I get hyperempathy a lot and one of the times I feel it the worst is just watching shows with embarrassing scenes. They hurt so bad to watch that I genuinely just avoid them at all costs. Although its the worst when I identify more with a character.
Oh man my second-hand embarrassment for film/tv/book characters is so bad, I can’t watch or read anything most of the time!
Second hand embarrassment is a killer to me. I cannot do it. I will predict the shenanigans and cover my eyes with my fingers and ears with my thumbs. If it goes on too long then the show goes off and I'll probably never watch it again. I'm not willing to go through cringing at all that everytime I remember the rest of the show.
Y e s same
omg same !!!!
Yuuuiip
I wrote a paper on the double empathy problem and relevance theory in relation to autism and I think it’s so important to the understanding of autism and a step away from all the theory of mind conceptions that can be really stigmatizing. I highly recommend looking into it!
@@rambunctiousvegetable I think its an under-researched concept in general. I just find it interesting and am glad that alternative views of autism are being looked into. I don't really know any other autistic people so I can't say if I relate to it. Hopefully more focus will be given to all levels of autism in future research!
@@rambunctiousvegetable Hey, not to be ironic, but want to understand deeper:
Could you clarify what part(s) of your communication are some degree of "bad"?
I, too, have had plenty of miscommunications, misunderstandings, and arguments with other autistic people to the point where I question if I'm actually autistic or not (I'm self-diagnosed right now; waiting on evaluation). But I'm definitely autistic from what I can tell, and I do have my fair share of all of those things with neurotypicals also.
A lot of people would probably use an overall level of functioning for me of a 1 (I say that because I'm not really a firm believer in overall and static functioning levels/labels for autism, as it seems to not work that way?), but I would personally say my communication averages at 2. I can easily shoot to 3 when you throw emotional dysregulation into the mix. I may go nonverbal to where I literally have to pry my lips and teeth open to speak verbally or literally have to push myself to type, my brain may shut down and have me catatonic, I may need to go from a verbal conversation to a written one or use visual aids because I can't hold all the information in my mind to work with (but my visual processing might also shut down)...and it's very hard when I go through these things and other autistic people think that I'm just being difficult or trying to be manipulative.
So I'm not sure about the overall functioning level, but I think you're on to some aspect.
@@rambunctiousvegetable Going to come back at a later point to respond to the entire thing, but wanted to at least thank you for explaining more clearly how support needs levels work and what language to use around the social deficit part. A large part of it is that I haven't had some things explained to me very clearly and haven't had much practice with explaining, so I feel like I'm clumsily explaining my experience when it comes to that. I'll have to take some time to integrate that information into my understanding and figure out my thoughts/opinions from there.
EDIT: I meant levels, not labels
The ghosting your friends thing reminds me of my dad. Him and his best friend both travelled a lot for work, literally would only see each other a few times a year and would never call or message each other between that. One of them would just be like, "oh hey I'm gonna be in the area next month for work, can I stop by your house?" and when they would see each other they would just hug, head out to the patio or living room to talk and pick up right from where they left off like they had seen each other just the day before.
Hmm🎉
Me and 2 of my cousins. Only 1 other left now. Sigh
35:27 I relate to this so much! My mom is trained in assisting "special needs" kids (she's an assistant director at a preschool), and she wasn't able to identify my autistic traits as autistic. I also think she might be autistic as well because a lot of autistic traits I have I've put off as, "Oh, that's just genetic because my mom does the same thing".
it's crazy how often our experiences can relate to so many people! we really are less of minority than people think!
If everyone is autistic, what does it even mean. Being quirky does not mean you’re autistic
@@Jjjbbb5678 Just because autism has a genetic component or is not super duper rare does not mean everyone is autistic.
The Ted talk tiktok repeated itself. Thought I would let you know.
Oops! Next time I'll pay better attention ugh.
@@noiseforautism its ok i just thought I would point it out to help you and keep from confused people like me when it first happened. Its ok though. I don't mind it.
@@phoebebaker9665 thank youu!
@@KiaraHope your welcome.
I think I’m autistic..
oh my gosh finally somebody talked about the tight clothing thing!! I always described it as liking my clothes to feel "secure." I don't want tight clothes all the time, but the pressure can help me feel grounded. It makes it hard to shop for clothes sometimes because something that's comfortable for me in one situation could be uncomfortable in another, and every clothing brand for autistic people focuses on making everything soft and smooth.
that's why I like to wear belts
I'm the opposite I can't stand tight or fitted clothes
I just got a vivid memory from when I was about 8 or 9 years old. I remember getting in trouble with my teacher because she caught me eating a piece of paper. At the time, I had a habit of eating my pencil erasers and stabbing my big white eraser with my pencil during class. I even used to nibble on my pen caps sometimes. So, I was sent to a councilor and my mother was there with me. I don't remember much from the conversation, but I do remember the councilor asking why I was eating paper in class. I didn't really know why I was doing it, but I knew that people eat things when they're hungry, so I said it was because I was hungry. My mother asked me why I didn't just wait until lunch time. I said I don't know. The councilor said that I was doing it to get attention. My mother asked me whose attention I was trying to get because I already had hers. I said I didn't want attention. And especially not negative attention. The councilor didn't believe me. She said that negative attention was the type of attention I got. I don't remember anything else after that, but I never ate paper in class again. I still ate and stabbed my erasers though.
It's disheartening reading how many people were f'd over by school counselors & or by counselors & psychologists in general who are/were hired bc they're supposed to know how to help, but they do the opposite. 😟
Damn. I don't remember getting in trouble for it, mostly just kinda called out--but I did a lot of those things. Loved making designs in the eraser with my pencil and making my own connect the dots.
it's the way we all stabbed our erasers as kids though lol. why is this such a common experience for autistic ppl?? it's just like. mmm. textuuure. satisfyinnng.
Whats that mean ..
@Lanturn its not an aut symptom
I'm so glad I'm not in middle school and high school anymore because the noise levels of just... People talking in class, all at the same time, while I was trying to work, were SO overwhelming and I ended up in tears from the stress of masking (without knowing I was masking), sensory overload, and all the other stuff affecting my mental wellbeing. I had people witness my meltdowns when I cried from the noise and some stood up for me, while others ostracized me for being "too senstitive".
Im in university now, and bc of lots of stuff (including the global pandemic) I've spent the past the last 3 years in virtual classes... And I'm scared to go back in-person. I have no idea if I'll be able to handle it
Have you tried noise reducing earbuds?
39:38 made me have to stop and cry. That one really hit home for me. I used to think I “grew out of” my meltdowns because I used to have fits of anger as a child but I don’t anymore, but really I’m just very repressed. I just cease to function. What he describes is so similar to how I feel when things pile on, and I have felt so guilty for years because I couldn’t do it. All these things felt so minor and I felt awful because I should just be able to get on with it but instead I just couldn’t do anything but crawl into bed and let one of my cats lean against me.
I hope he’s okay. I hope you are all okay. Protect yourselves.
One of my earliest memories growing up was wanting to be where people were talking and things were lively, but not necessarily wanting to interact in that environment. I liked being around family but sometimes it was a lot to process. So often times I would sit or lay somewhere, close my eyes, and just focus my energy on my surroundings. By slowing down and not moving much- aside from maybe some fidgeting with my hands or feet. I could hear things a lot clearer. I also felt a lot happier and relaxed. I recall watching the lights in front of my eyelids change or darken when someone moved in front of a light. I remember the sound of someone getting off the rocking chair. Sometimes during doing this I would fall asleep, but mostly I just remember letting people think I was asleep. Interestingly, it wasn't until looking back that I even realized that's what I was doing. I just knew it was one of my favorite things to do.
Unfortunately... this coping would extend to a lot of things later in life. I would go into that ''idle'' mode, even without purposely doing so. Making me forgetful, communicate less, and sometimes just confused. While I know I had some meltdown-like (??) moments in my childhood. I think the reason why I didn't /don't have them as much of as is associated with autistics, is that I am MUCH more likely to shutdown than meltdown. It's like instead of my brain firing a bunch of signals, it just goes ''alright shut'er down boys''. That said, the times I did meltdown (later on in life) was when I was forced to be present while in shutdown mode. If I try to push past it, It's like the switch is flipped and I'm visibly and/or verbally freaking out instead.
10:38 - “hearing the truth moves us to tears”
Me: Starts tearing up
No but this EXACT SAME THING HAPPENED TO ME!!😂
I am currently reading the book that he's talking about and I have cried several times. Just realizing that no adults in my life saw that I needed help. It's so obvious looking back.
I got my son diagnosed and this journey has made me self diagnose. Helping my son is like helping my small self. This video is healing and triggering at the same time but I’m so happy I’m understanding myself more. I used to hate myself and thought I was odd. I suffered and silence and masked so much I can’t recognize my natural self.
First of all, I'm so glad there was mention of AFAB people with autism. I'm trans and potentially autistic and it always socks when people talk about women with autism and men with autism cause I never know where I fit medically in that case. Second of all, I have a weird mix of hyper empathy and a complete lack of empathy, so it's refreshing to hear about that from an actual neuroscientist. I had a therapist who told me I couldn't be autistic because I was too empathetic, even though I display a lot of symptoms and traits. She also said I was too well adjusted to be autistic when I'm 23 years old and have learned to mask a variety of things quite well. I'm hoping to find a therapist that actually knows what they are talking about one day haha.
I'm a transmasc autistic and you're practically describing me. My first therapist, who saw me when I was perhaps 21, was extremely dismissive of me. It took until when she accused me of being "dramatic and attention-seeking" during a session where I cried from trying to speak while nonverbal for me to realize she'd been dismissive the entire time. She said to me what your therapist said about you, and that hurts. You didn't deserve that.
When I got diagnosed at 23, I went to a place that specialized in Autism diagnosis and had a diverse clientele (because I'm not white). There, it was a lot smoother. If you can, try to find a specialist or an office that specializes in Autism, and see if they're reviewed well by more than one demographic. I hope you find the support you need. 💜
well, I'm not offering new information but I recommend finding an autistic specialist, because whether you're trans or not a trained individual should be able to spot masking when its present.
Being a transman is caused by being an autistic female and not knowing how to cope with patriarchal abuse.
@gengarfluid Identifying as transmasc is completely normal for an autistic female. It's caused by being unable to mask and cope with patriarchal abuse of females. Your therapist abused you for being female.
You would obv fit with women in medical terms since medically you're female. Your biological processes are female.
all the adult psychs in my area: a diagnosis? you're over the age of 17??? ma'am that'll be $2,000 if you want a diagnosis
I feel so called out by the Autism / ADHD bit.
In addition to Gregory I also feel like Jacob is autistic as well. He loves to info-dump and can't tell when people are getting fed up with him 🤣, misunderstands social cues and situations (like when Janine was having a row with her sister and he thought it was about the board game they were playing) and his dedication to making sure that he does the best for his students, coworkers and Abbott. In one of the episodes Gregory didnt get the point about having work acquaintances (either we're friends or not) and small talk but Jacob is overly friendly to the point of smothering. I love him and Greg together and it's funny that the next vid is abt autistics getting along with each other better than neurotypicals
"Neurotypicals eat when they're hungry." I felt so called out!
I don't always feel when I'm hungry, and even when I do, I still don't want to. xD
Yeah I don’t even remember what thirsty feels like anymore. Sometimes I say I’m thirsty (very rare maybe once a month) and I stop for a minute like that’s it! Thirsty!
@@Damned_afterall I almost never feel thirsty. o: I have to force myself to drink water, otherwise I'd probably be on death's door. When I was a teenager, I drank water maybe a few times a year. xD
All people don't always notice or eat when they're hungry. That's literally just normal.
@@neoniceSometimes, yes. As with all diagnoses it’s a matter of scale.
What neurotypical people don’t do is avoid making meals nearly every day because the task paralysis and sensory blocks to get over in order to acquire food are so huge that the effort feels insurmountable. They don’t struggle to feed themselves enough to survive on the regular/have recurring issues with malnourishment/form other health issues that spawn off of regularly not eating or drinking enough.
I regularly get dents in my nailbeds from the periods where getting myself to eat is too much of a struggle. I have chronic urinary pain that came from years of ignoring/not noticing my thirst. Alexithymia is real, catatonia is real, autism is real. And even if everyone struggles with those things sometimes that doesn’t negate the existence of clinically significant rates of those problems.
The one about friendship and callimg/checking in. Yes! This! I wish more people got this.
Hahaha. "Did you know you could do it this way?" I just had that conversation with a coworker the other day.
I showed that to my s. o. 😅
22:42
this had me crying so hard.
I can pin point the moment that ruined my mental health, and that was when I was talking to my mom about being bullied at school and having her tell me that 'maybe if you stopped talking about pokemon then people would treat me better.'
and for years ive spent hiding my special interests, to the point that Ive become ashamed to even take part in them in private. like im doing something wrong by being excited, and that my passion is a dirty secret. im trying hard to unlearn these feelings and its slow going, but its nice to remember that im not alone.
I once explained autism to someone in the sense that, for everything a neurotypical thinks of someone with autism, people with autism probably think the same thing about neurotypicals.
So if typicals think we are annoying, well chances are autistic people find typicals annoying!
If a typical thinks autism has unique qualities, well autism most likely feels the same too about typicals. Its odd because for all the misunderstanding there is, we do on some level understand each others general nature. And that alone is enough to stary a spark, good or bad.
I personally don’t feel like this is entirely true. As an autistic person, I do find neurotypical people challenging in certain ways, but I don’t generally react to them in the same way that they react to me. (I’m not trying to imply that one side is “worse”. The specifics vary based on the situation, too much so to generalize.)
To give one example of what I mean: There is a decent chance that a neurotypical person will find autistic mannerisms strange and inexplicable, if they aren’t familiar with autism and/or haven’t had much interaction with autistic people. On the other hand, most autistic people are accustomed to seeing neurotypical people and how they behave. Even if they lack an instinctive understanding of neurotypical communication, neurotypical mannerisms would be more likely to come across as “confusing, but not unusual” rather than “weird” in the eyes of an autistic person. This difference in perception may influence the way each person outwardly reacts to the other.
However, I do think you’re right in some ways, and that this is a good perspective to consider, particularly to encourage people to rethink common generalizations.
This is a tangent, but I hope that “typicals” does not become a common way to refer to neurotypical people. It sounds unkind.
First of all, the battle between the auto generated subtitles and the word naltrexone had me laughing so hard I was crying. I'm watching the video going "I really thought everyone did that." "Wow, I thought that was normal"..... "oh, um, I think I have an appointment to make."
Thanks so much! I'm so glad you enjoyed it.
The older gentleman at 35-40 minutes. Holy. I feel you dude.
@16:19 this is a real autistic meltdown, the actress is autistic (and adhd) and sent herself into a meltdown to make it look real and authentic
The first one makes me so mad I swear to god
Definitely a vibe its annoying
I know right!? like if They said the actual reasons why They had that Things on Their Ears….
THEN ACTUALLY LISTENING TO THAT SAID REASONS,YA DIPSHITS BEFORE YOU MADE PEOPLES HATE YOU BECAUSE YOU DON'T LISTEN TO THE PERSON TELLING YOU THE SAID REASONS!!!!
17:42 Never related harder; I do this to family and friends and it isn’t because I don’t care, it’s because I’m trying to sort a lot of things out or feel bad that all I have is bad news on my end. Than when things get better I think well I waited too long and don’t call even longer.
It's really tough! I'm sure if you just call though someone will be happy to hear from you! Even if its been a while.
Greggory was Chris from everyone hates Chris. Crazy to see him.
22:40
I relate to this so strongly that my heart hurts. I've had this happen so many times that I've taught myself to not get excited.
I'm known in my family to not get excited when something they know I like is coming out.
Its a trauma response, I think
Depending on the situation it could be either freezing (to avoid being attacked and rejected) or a fawning response (so that people don't get weird and dismissive)
Or both
Could be inward fleeing too.
Finding others who have the same interest can be amazing
AHHHHHH SCREAMIIIIING
This is so wild🫠🫠🫠
l've just come to terms with the fact my family gets annoyed. Luckily they don't do anything really bad I just force them to listen and slip in plants and Ninjago in every conversation lmaoo
a lil b4 21:47 yeah, my own therapist said i was low empathy bc idk how to react when someone was crying. Thats just bc of trauma that im still going through though, and bc of it i cant say that its said trauma for legal reasons (im still a kid yaknow) but being told i have no empathy when in on the verge of tears just from seeing someone cry really fucks me up
23:49 that was some thing I never realized before. I called my mom out on this all the time. I was recently talking to my mom about it ‘Hey, I think I have autism can I go get checked out or maybe just get diagnosed or something because I’m really thinking I have it.’ And I was expecting a bad reaction, right but I wanted to get it out of my system because it was just overwhelming my mind and I needed help contacting a doctor because I am awkward as fuck on the phone. So I asked and she was really OK with it and I was like hell yeah, this is going better than I thought maybe I was just freaking out for no reason and so I was talking to her more about it because I was understanding that she was receptive to the idea and what I was talking about and then midsentence as I’m explaining like why I think I’m autistic and getting ready to like dive deep in to the topic she turns to me and just starts talking about my niece, saying how proud she is that she finally started to talk and like my whole brain just short circuited and I looked at her and I and I got upset but I let her finish talking about whatever it is she wanted to talk about that was so important. And it wasn’t because I’m literally in the group chat where all of this information was shared. And then I turned to her and I said ‘hey, I’m very upset that you did that’ and she said ‘what? what did I do?’ and I said ‘that you rudely interrupted me when I was talking about some thing that was very important to me. I did not appreciate it, and I think you were very extremely rude at that moment.’’ And she was like I wasn’t rude, I just don’t wanna talk about it and I was like ‘OK then tell me you don’t want to talk about it don’t just ignore what I’m saying unvalidate me, and then move on at your own pace. Because that destroys me and makes me feel less in every sense.’ But she didn’t understand that. And just kept goingand moved on the topic because she didn’t want to talk about it anymore. 😤
Sounds exactly like my mom
O.O I feel so seen. I am 30 years old. I go through a lot of daily frustrations, my stim is rubbing my socks to the point of ripping them apart.... I hyper fixate on things as well.
Why is it that I don't think I really match the autism diagnostic material, but I relate so strongly to like 90% of these.
Your unique needs and limitations deserve consideration and respect. But just believing you're autistic doesn't make you autistic. The word is more a billing category for insurance companies than it is a useful description of someone's subjective experience of their own mind.
you could be autistic! you might also want to look into other possibilities too like adhd, ocd, anxiety, etc since there can be a lot of overlap in symptoms :)
Because some people are self diagnoseing themselves ..wich you never do
@Aislee Love Greenwood not true its only a disability if it majes you non functioning
@Aislee Love Greenwood everyone has lots of these symptoms and are not artistic
19:23 I am waiting on my results from my assessment, but this! This right here is probably my number one problem most days. I have to shower, eat something cause I'm shaky cause I forgot to eat the night before, and I have to do dishes. Well, I have to do dishes before I can cook to eat something because all of the dishes are dirty. I also have to do the dishes before I take my shower because I always spill nasty water down the front of myself when I am doing dishes, but I have to wait at least an hour between doing the dishes and taking a shower, but then I figure out I have to do at least two loads of dishes, so I can't take a shower right away but still have to wait for the hot water to come back before I can run the dishwasher again, and while I'm going through all of this in my head I'm feeling more and more lightheaded from low blood sugar and I need to eat now! But I literally have nothing to cook on or with, so I start doing dishes and get a headache so I have to stop cause I'm getting anxious. 6 hours later, I am sitting in the kitchen, still haven't eaten, the dishes haven't been done yet, and I still haven't taken a shower and now I have to put on my mask before my boyfriend gets home so he doesn't lose sleep or worry at work if I'm doing okay or not. I tell him "I'm just tired" and he accepts that most of the time. If he digs any deeper, I always end up sobbing uncontrollably because I wasn't good enough at hiding my issues, which was almost literally beaten into me as a child.
37:44 as well! I did that so muchin any crowded loud place!
Ahhhhhh! I'm pretty sure Quinni from HBH is actually an Autistic person.
(Sarcasm) crazy how actually hiring Autistic people to play autistic characters results in accurate representation! lol
The first one is me with my noise cancelling earbuds at school 😅, I can HEAR PEOPLE YOU KNOW ITS MISOPHONIA.
Got so frustrated with the first one had to get up and take a walk
I JUST SPEND ONE HALF HOUR ON AN AUTISM QUIZ AND ANOTHER HALF HOUR ON ANOTHER ONE
BOTH CLAIMED TO NOT COST ANYTHING
THEY DID AND I CANT PAY
I AM SO ANGRY RN
Dang thats rough! I feel like its hard to find free resources. Especially with health stuff. Maybe better help but ive never used it!
Have you found any since the time you commented? If not, give the tests on "embrace autism" a try. they might be helpful and are completely free
@@iTzic21i second embrace autism
Damn that elementary school lunchtime one really hit home
I'm sorry, I just had to pause-- That Tiktok with the video of a girl named Quinni having a meltdown-- THAT is a normal meltdown?! I've been having meltdowns?! Other people have this same response to things? I'm not just some freak who can't regulate my shit?
I need a moment
I’m not autistic but have adhd and need a little music in my ears not loud but I help me concentrate and helps with background noise as well or I can’t do anything I get overwhelmed
the professor in music broke my heart , i cant help but tearing up , realizin how closely i can relate
In the second one, when they said ‘orange furry sweetheart’ I immediately yelled out “THE LORAX!”
22:45 Um yeah, uh.. I was in such a state of shock that I did actually cry like mentioned before in the video! I had never given this much thought before but yes, of course! I've had the exact same experience! It really just never hit me or hit home like that.
Once I told my mom "I think I'm autistic" and she looked at me kinda wide-eyed. Does that mean she's scared of autistic people? Why? What else could that mean? How am I supposed to react to that? Do I acknowledge it? Anyways I'm trying to be more persistent and get a diagnosis. The main pushback I'm getting from my parents is, "Why do you think you need one?" "If you got one, how would it help?" And I honestly don't know how to answer that !! Does anyone have ideas??
Sorry for the tangent, by the way ^^"
Edit for a grammatical error !!
I think it helps validate and heal a lot of things that happen to you. Like when you know and someone else confirms that was autism. It just makes life easier to understand and find coping mechanisms. Also, if you were diagnosed, do know there are negatives. You should look into what its like to have a disability, disclosure laws, etc. You will legally be classified as disabled.
@@noiseforautism Thank you for helping to put things into words! I also thank you for guiding me on where to look negatives-wise. I always knew there were negatives, but once you actually want to look into things, it becomes a somewhat daunting task. Grazie grazie !! ♡☆
Also, human beings simply like classifying things. The hope would be that we can be aware and intelligent enough to understand that labels do not describe a person, a thing, or a group in it’s entirety. Everything and everyone is multifaceted, complex, but having some kind of context is ok. But ya, from what I’ve heard there are positives and negatives to getting diagnosed, as with anything.
This was a great video collab thank you for posting. Many of the things were so relatable and there were so many aha moments for me personally.
45:01 - 46:29 honestly reminds me of what might have happened in my past with some people. Not that people really said this, but I was just. . . it just reminds me of a lot of negative things that happened that I wish I would have had more control over, and I think I could've. But things were just... so hard. And just. . . I didn't understand myself and I don't think others supper did either. Not that Autism was on people's minds like ever. I wish I would've known myself better and done better . . .things could have turned out so differently. I don't know weather to give myself grace or continue to punish myself if I was in full control the whole time.
“Squishmallows are like crack for autistics” Not me staring at my enormous pile of Squishmallows (which also happens to be one of my special interests) as well as my (almost complete) collection of squishmallow trading cards (yes they exist, thank me later) as well as my squishmallow sticker collection and we can’t forget about the squishmallow croc charms! 😂 My favorite is Rosie if you were wondering 😅
I was here for my kid honestly but that woman at around 28 or so minute mark has me convinced I am here for myself, everything saw spot on.
the actor who plays quinn in heartbreak high is actually autistic!!!
16:00 im not even gonna lie, this genuinely made me cry. so far ive only seen myself have meltdowns, i dont think ive ever seen any of my friends or, anyone at all have an autistic meltdown. very very powerful stuff.
IF YOU HAVE "BROKEN WRIST SYNDROME", GET CHECKED FOR EHLER'S-DANLOS SYNDROME! cannot stress this enough! if you have it, you need to know as early as possible!
The expenses for healthcare WITHOUT the weed cost included 😅🌿 true.
I don't believe a game of telephone is a great way to gauge social communication and/or cooperation on a grander and more complex scale. It seems very limited and facile.
It does suggest to me, though, that you'd better have a mix of Neuro types if you want a funny outcome in telephone.
44:02 this one really hit me...i recently went to an electronic music open mic at a hackerspace with some friends, and it was basically in a garage/warehouse type place with everyone sitting on mismatched office chairs or standing around. at first, i was the only person who was walking around in the back getting distracted by all the other neat things in the space, and then, once a desk chair was available, i went and sat down and started vibing to the music...feet quietly tapping, chair lightly swiveling back and forth, leg bouncing, head bopping, etc. i glanced around a few times and nobody else was doing anything even close to that 😅 but idc, listening to live music is just so much better when i can feel it in my body
Don't remember if it was this video (commenting after i x'ed out the tab) but the fingers going in and out of my ears to change the noise input is very familiar to me. Didn't know others did it too lol
I definitely have issues with heat and cool and my hands and feet being cold. I thought it was lyme disease. When I was a kid I went hungry a lot because I couldn't eat what my family cooked. I raised myself from 14/15 after being kidnapped and having to get away myself anf deal with the whole aftermath myself, being a young mother pregnant at 16 whose baby dady was older and went to prison. I had to emancipate myself and get my own apartment. I never have haf anyone there for me people dont believe me when I tell them what I went through. I have been through severe situations and nobody helped if I called authorities they aldo didn't help and really made me afraid to ask for help in fear of recieving the opposite. I have never had anyone tell me about autism, now that I am learning about I now know my children are also autistic. And it just sucks seeing how little everyone cares and how badly we are treated and why.
22:57 Oh I feel this so much. It's so sad.
15:50 Not me literally sitting like that while watching this TikTok :0
hahaha yeah I have to correct myself everytime I get to that point
Same tho like that is literally my sleeping position ?? I had no idea
44:19 I must rock back and fourth while my brain makes me a whole animated storyboard that I’m never gonna animate to that song I’ve listened to over ten times in a row
Me to the Neurotypical kid who looks like SpongeBob and bullies me:
*Hmmmmmmmmm*
You can’t understand the Uber power of My Uber autism
oh the Jurassic Park pots!!! I'd be stuck in that garden center the rest of the day XD
I LOVE loop earbuds. They are a game changer for me. I work in a hospital on the floor where there is 1000 alarms at all times for literally everything. For 12 hours. I can hear the alarms. But they are not as...💢🤬😭😣
Halfway through the first tiktok and I already want to pull my hair out 😭
4:20 that's funny because I don't expect myself to live pass my 50th birthday, lol.. I guess I'm right
Awww omg I hope you live much longer lol!
@@noiseforautism with the world like this I doubt it. Plus since I am in chemistry and hopefully molecular viology field I'll most likely meet some dangef at work. Kinda ideal for me. Going out by my own invention or research ir something like that
Indeed😮
Omg 23 mins. Fuck yes this. Holy shit this is so freaking true. I feel this so much. Being tried to care but then no one caring about your special interest is the every day.
And at around 40 minutes. That is so a shit thing to deal with and it just keeps happening and everyone acts like its a total shock and surprise. Nope its everytime. But people refuse to remember or care.
… well when I was a child I did used to move so hard to the music that my parents had to tell me to stop because shaking the entire car was making driving hard.
THank's for the trigger warning for showing a meltdown. I intentionally bit on my finger in a non harmfull manner toi be able to cope with that to not have a meltdown myself watching a played or true meltdown of someone else around 17:00
THAT FIRST ONE OH MY GOD that shit is so frustrating
I was diagnosed in january of this year, I'm a teen, and I really hate airports.
I bring an emotional support stuffed animal whenever I travel to keep myself regulated.
If someone says "You are way too old to be carrying a stuffed animal" I would say. "Try spending a day in my shoes..."
Another stereotype people make about me is that I have a lack of empathy.
Ummmm...... I am a literal Empath. I can see your emotional Aura without even trying...
It's so hard!😫
THE ONE THAT SAID NEUROTYPICALS EAT WHEN THEY'RE HUNGRY JUST REMINDED ME THAT I'M HUNGRY OMG
hey thanks for selling me on abbot elementary by putting that clip in there :v always assumed it was like the middle or another boring ABC show, THRILLED to have it make me laugh my ass off like it just did 😂
You know something I’ve learned that I think that I do but it’s a telltale sign that I could be autistic but I just never thought about it until this moment. When I am crying instead of feeling sad, which I normally am sad because I cry, but instead of thinking about the sadness I focus more on if I’m crying right. Like when I’m crying the thing that I’m thinking about the most is how my face is looking while I’m crying and why do I cry so weirdly. And the sadness is always second in these moments. I always thought that was just a normal, but I’m coming to the understanding that a lot of my thoughts are not normal. And I haven’t heard this one mentioned yet but I’m pretty sure this is like part of the thing.😂😅
Oh Woogity. 😑 I relate to the first thing SO much. People think I'm being crude and rude or disrespectful because I keep 💤 earplugs in most of the day... Especially in the car/truck. It's so helpful. ❤
Cannibis 👌 for the win, begone cptsd symptoms, begone Insomnia, hello zen.
The red haired girl at around 23 min I so feel her.
45:28 It takes so much restraint not to become vulgar beyond words with the people too ignorant or flat out stupid to understand what neurodivergent and neurology actually is, like.... do those people think they're a tiny person in a mech suit making choices at a desk or something? Do they know how brain meat actually works their bodies not exactly them (I'm aware it's complicated) ooooh my fecking Filbert frying rice crackers.... it makes me so completely furious.
Normal people eat when theyre hungry
And
Direct communication is beaten out of us.
Ouch
Edit: the fluctuating volume killed me 😂😂😂😂
3:51 “Neurotypicals eat when they’re hungry”
Not me currently avoiding food cuz everything sounds gross right now even though i last ate yesterday at noon.
Omg the broken wrist. I sleep like that every night. 😩
so many of these videos have nearly silent audio... i can't turn my speakers up anymore and i'm not putting on headphones lol
I cant relate to much of majority of "tiktok autism" at all. They include so much fluff
You know thats okay! I think some experiences are different these are just ones I've related the most to.
3:48 I've never felt so directly called out as someone who suspects I'm autistic and also will not eat when I'm hungry until shit gets dire 💀
The ads disguised as content, selling pharmaceuticals, make me mad that I watched this video.
I keep watching all these autism videos... I relate to 90% of them and I also have two daughters who are neurodivergent. I keep telling myself I'm not autistic...
bro the tiktok at 1:01:38 is so eye opening for me
i actually might be mad if imposter syndrome kicks in again
41 mins in awww 🥺 i love that man. Ill be praying for that man.and men whose gonna be busy later too. ❤
This was me but with walking in my toes and saying because I wanted to be taller?and my mom thought I was making a joke or being a kid and silly, but no I just couldn’t handle putting my bare feet fully down on the cold hardwood floor 🫡 like I still can’t thinking about it rn makes me want to vomit or cry or both. Thank u for your comment. It really resonated with me and my childhood. I could also say I chewed on weird stuff. For me it was rubber so I’d ruin all my swim goggles (,:
Omg I just realized, this is why I HATE led headlights and wish they would make them illegal.
Ayyy shout out to Loop ear plugs ~♡
I thought this was just some weird thing I do- but whenever I’m watching something, I subtitles. Like- holding back tears if they’re not on, but also not wanting to be a burden by asking to put the, on because people will need to take a minute out of their time to turn on subtitles and probably rewind the show/movie to watch what they missed while putting them on, and also sometimes the subtitles are big and people complain that they can’t see part of the screen.
That’s something neurotypical people do? :D
Aw thats so sad! I know some people are annoyed but they need to get their ableism out of the way.
37:43 literally me bro😳😳
I remember telling all my friends to do it too
48:42 "since I've been self medicating these past couple of weeks"
Good Lord, please be careful, watching this, with self medicating with cannabis.
Because of the huge overlap between autism and mental illness.
If you have ever had any symptoms of psychosis, or have any first or second degree relatives who have schizophrenia or a psychosis related mental illness,
Cannabis is probably a terrible idea, though it may take some time for that to become apparent. Please be careful!
I think I agree, I've heard autistic ppl are at higher risk 5 drug addiction I hope every is super careful
Processing temperature: I’ve struggled with knowing how to dress for the weather and have always been amazed by people who appear to dress appropriately. It stresses me out! Like, how did you know to wear the lighter jacket today? Which is appropriate for the temperature and I’m in a heavy coat with gloves, burning up. 🙄
The casual ableism at the beginning
i love the allism/allistic: non autistic person one. Took me a second to figure it out but once i did.
i never understood the "special interests" bit about autism. do people not have favorite shows or interests? what makes it different between those who are neurotypicals and those with autism/adhd?
My understanding is that NTs don't really talk about their interests to people who don't know anything about them. Like maybe a "I've been watching this new show, you should watch it" but thats about it. Meanwhile I find myself compulsively bringing up my special interests in unrelated conversations and the interest is like a part of my personality. Then again, I've seen a number of "neurotypicals" who make liking The Office their entire personality sooo
Intensity and longevity
Its popular now and they talk about it, then move on to the next popular show and never mention the first one again? Neurotypical
It hasn't been on the air for decades? They can quote which episode a 3 second clip os from? They use it to explain how they feel? Special interest.
Now thats on point!
has anyone noticed the sound lagging?
Yes im so sorry! Ive been trying to figure out how to get them uploaded correctly but somethings weird with the encoder on my computer. But im working on it! And compiling more videos!
The first one was so relatable lmao