Omg this is so me right now! I had no idea that it could be something to do with my Borderline Personally Disorder. I used to be a fully functioning quiet borderline 2 jobs, school, gym, socialized and then my favorite person broke my heart and ghosted me and I became so depressed and overwhelmed I stopped caring about everything I dropped out of my life and went into hiding ... complete shut in mode... I can barely leave the house, I panic at the thought of going to the grocery store or any social event even with family, I’m always alone in my room feeling empty then I get anxiety about how I’m throwing my life away... how do I get rid of all this?? How do I fix it?? I don’t wanna be this way anymore 😞 I wanna be able to function like a normal person and socialize and have normal relationships no favorite person stuff no borderline, no anxiety, no ptsd, no agoraphobia idk how to fix it I fantasize about suicide constantly but I just can’t find it in me to just do it so how do I fix it
If you have been diagnosed then please get therapy, even talk to therapists online or check out the suicide hotline/helpline website because they do aid people in matching them with the proper resources and you can even start from within your home and get help without feeling too overwhelmed being pushed to go out right away. I pray for your recovery and a happy New Year of possibilities. 💖💖💖💖
My mom retired from NASA, then shut herself in her house until she died. My grandma, same. I shut in after I unplugged my mom and covid kinda obfuscated my lock in. But I am so encouraged that I'm not as crazy or alone as I thought. You're a shining light, Doc. Please don't give up. Ive made the firm determination to end it here. My daughters have to be unburdened of the awful responsibility for an ill/ damaged parent.
Completely reclusive for over 2.5 years. If I do get out of the house for doctor appointments or absolutely have to be social on a rare occasion, the next day I am completely drained and need a recovery time. It sucks but I’m used to this way of life. My favorite person was murdered but I have a sweet dog to stay with me.
why is it that you always seem to post exaclty what it is I need? I don't leave the house because of agoraphobia AND HERE U ARE POSTING THIS I'm dead inside Dr fox you are my hero
I was diagnosed as a borderline, I have 9 of 9 diagnostic criteria symptoms I can’t leave the house unless I’m dressed to the nines because people offend you less often when you look better and i am waaaaay to sensitive to perceived slights I refuse all kinds of family get together as sports outings etc due to this anxiety.
Middle C I can definitely relate to this as I am the exact same way. I have missed so many family gatherings with my girlfriends family because of my BPD. I have a closet full of clothes and a ton of makeup but never feel that any of it is popping enough. No matter how good my girlfriend tells me I look, I usually always end up having a full meltdown and end up staying home. I too have all 9 symptoms of BPD.
I also do this! I've found that sometimes folks find me stuck up. However it couldn't be less true. I think that dressing up somehow improves my low self esteem and increases my overall confidence in a much larger way than my peers
I did not realize that Agoraphobia and BPD overlapped like that. You just described me. Thank you for helping to make it understandable. You teach in such a way without judgement. I have struggled for years trying to understand the Agoraphobia and Borderline separately. Thank you for treating folks like us with respect and not treat us as losers and lepers.
I've had agoraphobia pretty much all my life, it seems no matter what I do personally I to some extent dread being in public spaces and avoid it like the plague. I am in my 30s now and feel the same as in my 20s on that.. it seems this stupid social anxiety refuses to leave me alone :/
I am constantly constantly singing "somebody's watching me" to calm myself down and remind myself how ridiculous it is that somebody's wants to watch me.
I am legally blind and have BPD, so getting around on my own often makes me very uneasy. I thank God for new apps that will deliver goods to your doorstep. I am able to avoid a great deal of anxiety. I go places with my husband and kids, but rarely go out on my own as much as most people do.
Just curious how you got into both the pet sitting and house cleaning? Do you do on your own or with a company? How did you get started? I cannot hold down a traditional job. Thanks
BPD housekeeper here lol 🙋🏼♀️🙋🏼♀️ The only downer to working alone all the time is getting too in your head on what I call “trigger happy days” but other than that I get to avoid soooo many other things. Hope today is good for you.
You are speaking me language. I have BPD plus generalized anxiety disorder, social anxiety disorder, and agoraphobia. Yes I have been diagnosed with all three anxiety disorders. Although my agoraphobia is very closely linked with my social phobia. I never leave my apartment, I rarely leave my bedroom. My social anxiety has gotten so bad that I find my self in my bedroom with my door closed and the curtains drawn and with headphones on still worrying about what people think of me. I know no one can see or hear me, but I am still overwhelmed with the thoughts of being judged.
Ive been going through that isolating myself self harm vary irrtable vary angry then full of energy then trying to keep the tires in not working making it worse were im telling my family members in the house keep ur voice down the nabors can hear u i havnt realized how bad i got i didnt want to tell fam cause i know the judge me but i did talk to a hotline and talking to them made me realize i need a little help like talk theropy and meds posib but please try it i will too don't let this stop u from living ur life theres so much more u are meant to change and help others
Me too all these diagnoses. Plus complex ptsd. Overwhelming and frustrating. Can’t seem to find a therapist around that knows what to do. And without being able to leave, kinda makes life worse
YES! it's that feeling of being judged and viewed as foolish, or stupid or whatever negative thought you can attribute I hate it SO much it runs through my mind nonstop when I am out and about and I can barely function. It reaches a point where all the internal monologue and stress of it all trying to put up the facade of being normal begins to cause me such anxiety I become irritable and it's kind of a buffer and protective mechanism to help me bear it
I wanted to say thank you Dr. Fox. My Mom was diagnosed as borderline and/ schizo-effective disorder. I saw similarities and i was self diagnosing myself as BPD. I have had 4 incredibly abusive ex relationships over 15 years, with what I believe were not well either, abusers alcoholic and a drug addict. I have a fear of true intimacy now. I think I have traits and some toxic coping skills that I have picked up in my life. I am 36 and finally healing. I finally see my BS and others objectively thank you Dr. Fox. I am dating a nice person, not abusive and kind. It doesn't feel normal, but I can not repeat this pattern.
I go through this too, as if everyone is watching me when I am out and about. I think it's a mix of both, the anxiety of being outside by ourselves brings on the agoraphobia.
I have the same feeling, but I do have anxiety and am on the spectrum of Aspergers, (not yet diagnosed) but do not have BPD. I wear sunglasses a lot because of this...😣😎
i'm thanking you already at 1:07 ! i was diagnosed 4 years ago with BPD and PPD (couldn't finish college because of paranoia) spent 2 years not being able to leave my house unless it was to go to my therapy and psychiatrist, and even with that i would only leave if one of my parents took me. before seeking treatment (ever since i can remember) i've always had social anxiety and the period of time i felt i could leave my house and "have fun" was when i was on drugs and alcohol. EDIT: 8:20 exacly... isolating myself was the only thing that would make sense in my mind to stop interfering in other people's lives, to prevent hurting them and to deal with the pain and remorse.
I am SO GLAD I found this channel! I have spent my whole life in a dysfunctional family system and NOW I am recovering thanks to YOU! Much Appreciated!
I don’t know why this surprised me because my agoraphobia manifests in a way that directly impacts my terror of abandonment. Thank you for covering something I never would have expected. Now to finish watching your video.
What is it when you have a phobia of using the phone? I getvsecere anxiety when I have to make a phone call sometimes I wont make the call when that wasn't an option
I'm so grateful the videos you make. I find so little information about my illnesses. I learn so much from your channel. Thank you for your time doing this.
Mine is linked to my IBS, if I will be stuck where I'm not near a bathroom , I won't go. Public transportation is out, I must sit near the door in meetings so I can get up if I need to without disturbing everyone.
Dr. FOX. THANK YOU! I have BPD and definitely battle with agoraphobia. Because of your videos my husband and I have gotten to a place to where we understand what's happening with me and have been dealing with it in a manageable way. We are trying hard to find a therapist that understands BPD like dr. Fox does.
Thank you for your videos. I've been diagnosed with BPD 5 years ago. I cannot participate in any therapy but your videos at least make me more conscious.
Just found this video…but man did you nail it dr.fox I believe I developed agoraphobia through my anxiety I haven’t been able to go to the mall or the downtown area of my city for years and depending on my stress level sometimes I can’t even go downstairs to my front door to get the mail. It sucks…I used to not always be like this and it’s caused me to lose friends and turn down dates…the only way I will go to anything is with my family and I have to drink or have headphones on because everything gets louder and if I hear someone laugh I think their laughing at me…I know it’s all in my head but it makes me just want to escape to hurry up go in and get out. Thank you for making this video dr.fox I’m improving so much thanks to you!
Thank you Dr. Fox! Your videos have helped me understand what I have. When Im feeling bad I watch one of your videos and it makes me feel better. You are extremely smart!!! I appreciate your videos so much. It has helped my family understand me better as well as myself. I know my enemy now.
I realised my extreme anxiety which at one time turned into full blown agoraphobia before I knew of my bpd, thing is with my agoraphobia is that I didn't consciously want to avoid people/crowds and eventually cars and even leaving the house but my body and mind would go haywire, extreme panic shut down and only when I finally got home would it calm, it felt so strange that I could feel these things happening to me but have a part of me that is stepped back watching all this going this is bizzare and insane, lol, it was horrendous, it still is but not as often as it used to be when I was younger. I laugh but it has ruined my life, I'm 40 now and was diagnosed with bpd this year, it explains alot but changes nothing, I'm now old, alone and full of regrets trying to come to terms with my chaotic wasted life, it's horrible to get to this age and realise you've been robbed of you're only shot at it.
@@natashagodfrey7775 well here's hoping anyway, I have been a lot better these last few years with medication and positive thinking and habits, feel like im enjoying life for the first time. I came into some money recently also which will further allow me to do some of the things ive always wanted to do but was too messed up and couldnt focus. It's been a horrible time the last few years too, suddenly losing my mother during covid, not being able to say goodbye nor have a funeral really hit hard but I was able to deal with it for the first time in my life I didn't break down, funny thing is she was diagnosed with bi polar disorder which we never knew about till her death, a very bizarre situation all round but her death I feel has placed more peices of the puzzle, it really explains a lot, to understand your own mother more through her death certificate is so odd. Anyway I will travel and enjoy life for a while, let my creative side flourish, my mother was artistic and I get that from her as well as this weird and wonderful mind, lol. It was a very complicated and rather difficult upbringing but she did the best she knew how but now I'm finally starting to live. R.i p shirley, maybe we'll meet again, maybe not either way I've got some living to do.
@@nylaclancy2655 I hope your able to get help and a medication that is right for you cause believe me things can change for the better, it's never going to be "normal" again but it can be better. Good luck to you.
I believe there is a certain rationality (or reasonableness) about social anxiety. If, for example, you were painfully embarrassed in public once or you have a stutter or something, then that would be quite rational to have anxiety. I know. Public speaking used to mortify me but what is there to fear - except in getting overwhelmed and saying stupid or inappropriate things. ✋🏻
This was an eye opener for me. Where I once felt condemned because of wanting to be alone and secluded due to my anxiety I now understand why, finally. Gosh I wish there were more therapists out there like you who understand my condition. I feel its an illness that is still very much misunderstood.
Yes I have literally created my environment from working to shopping and yes if I don’t have to go outside I don’t I don’t really have any friends at all I don’t talk to anyone really but my kids also know and they are aware and they try to help me
I have been diagnosed BPD AND ALL 4 subtypes I fit. I have childhood until adulthood trauma, I had an open TBI in 1995 age 11 I’m 36 my left frontal lobe is dead and I have PTSD, specific phobias social phobia anxiety disorder and I have for the past over 10 years have dealt with all the things that fit angora phobia. I am not and have not been treated for it right yet none of it. It has petty much ended my whole life
This video was very eye opening to me. I have had several psychiatric professionals say many different things about what I “might” have but never an official diagnosis. One who I was seeing for 2 years said bi-polar 2 with depression and anxiety showing agoraphobic traits. Of course that’s not the words she used but that’s basically what it said in my records when I or them sent to the next person I seen. I’ve since learned that I definitely don’t have bi polar but more important I’ve learned that I’m no longer going to stress myself out on trying to find out “what’s wrong with me” by getting a diagnosis because still to his day I don’t have one. I do know I have BPD traits and I know DBT is the answer and for now depression and anxiety meds as well as a mood stabilizer are as well but I do hope that meds will not be in my life forever. I’ve learned so much recently from a 2 week intensive outpatient program that DBT is what I need to focus on and learning new ways of communication with interpersonal relationships, grounding tools and coping skills as well a mindfulness and not spend so much time on figuring out what my diagnosis is. So that’s what I’m doing now. Thanks to your videos I’ve learned so much about myself and gained a lot of knowledge in general. Thank you for what you do, I’m very grateful to you.
This video helps so much, It puts all the puzzle pieces together, my family thought I was just being dramatic but after having a major panic attack, melt down and intense fear of abandonment at the grocery store I knew something other than just the borderline disorder was hiding underneath the surface. The ACE strategy is so helpful
Thank you. I STILL don’t know what this DREAD of leaving my home is. It’s not always strong, but ever since lockdown, it is constant. I don’t recall being like this before, but I was a workaholic. BPD traits (“quiet,” so I’ve read…I’ve never had anger issues, I get sad as sh&t, implode) seem to be taking over my existence, and it’s difficult to understand, let alone navigate, and advocate for yourself in our healthcare system. It all fits theoretically, but my mind doesn’t feel quite like my own any more, and the behaviors it seems to drive seem alien, too. Thank you, Dr. Fox, for these videos. I still feel so “off,” but maybe having the terms correct & keeping my butt in therapy will give me the acceptance, insight & coping strategies I need to step out of this mental vortex of disquiet & stay out…
I'm glad these videos have been helpful to you! It's not uncommon to feel "off" during these times, but with the right support and strategies, you can definitely find your way out of that mental vortex. Keep going!
I’ve often wondered if when it is said that BPD eases up with age, it sometimes really means some of the wilder acting-out DSMish behaviors fall away (they’re exhausting) and might be replaced by the hermit phase, especially after retirement. Perhaps one is no less in the throes of one’s core BPD, but expressing it differently.
I was a recluse and spent so many of my younger years with myself and I eventually got out into the world and had to adapt to living with social anxiety and I suppose what may be BPD as it explains a lot of my behaviors. I think I may be the quiet BPD type as I hold in all my feelings. but now that I have gotten older, I just don't want to deal with being triggered anymore and want everyone to just go away.. but at the same time, I know it's not healthy for a person to isolate.. so it's a catch 22
Yes!!!! Older I get (54) the more the stress, anxiety, fear of leaving my house have started controlling my life whereas before it was more my emotions etc that controlled me
I never noticed that I have agoraphobic traits, never would have known that my seclusion was due to more than abandonment issues. I'm so accustomed to being alone and not being able to rely on anyone that I've developed fears of being outside of my home alone. I'm so sick of living with this disorder, but it's like I can't even get help from the people that have been dealing with my case. Two years of therapy and I haven't managed to get rid of any of the identifying traits.
It's hard, especially when someone you thought loved and cared about you keeps triggering your abandonment issues and just reinforces your suspicions.. It just seems I am destined to go life alone without anyone else
I feel the same. I didn't know what the Agoraphobia was..I was diagnosed as paranoid with my Borderline Personality Disorder. Wow..this is really the first time (recently) I've investigated my disorders..it all makes sense now.
I was diagnosed with OCD at age ten. [Tangent, not agrophobia related, just peaked my interest when you said the statistics about anxiety disorders and BPD] I'm 22 now, and in the process of finding out if I have BPD... Growing up with a disorder, it never occurred to me that I might have another. I also come from childhood neglect and domestic violence in adolescence/young adulthood, so volatility in some way has always been a part of my life. I've had all the symptoms of BPD for several years, but never knew what BPD was, and always wrote off my intense fear of abandonment as either somehow related to me having an anxiety disorder, or my past. I knew it wasn't OCD exactly because the anxiety I get when I think someone is leaving, is very different from my obsession-compulsive thoughts or patterns... But I had no other explanation. I have very strong reactive moods, but I knew I didn't have bipolar. I had a hard time ever maintaining therapy, because I usually feel hurt by the therapist in some way and back out. A few months ago I decided to try again, and I'm in the process of seeing a professional to evaluate my symptoms [not self-diagnosing], but I think BPD may have been what I've been dealing with. But the statistic was interesting to me having grown up with OCD and realizing later in life I may have BPD; I even knew before that people with one disorder may later on develop another one or have one concurrently, and still, I never considered I might ever have something else, so I think I accidentally blocked myself from getting help for a while. Thanks for sharing!
I've never been diagnosed or treated but I'm nearly positive my father and I have BPD. I think the key to keeping my life intact has been creating stability whenever I can.
Thank you so much for this video! This is so interesting! I reached out for help because of agoraphobia but as we kept on working with my therapist, we figured out that I have BPD traits. To be honest, I got used to my own instability so much that if it weren't for anxiety and panic attacks, I would've never asked for help.
I am diagnosed with severe agoraphobia, just turned 23 from age of 16 to March this year I had imprisoned my self without leaving house even once almost 8 year you won't see many worse cases and I now go out regularly so if I can do it any one can do it its all about baby steps
I have periods of being social then TOTAL withdrawal. I don't leave the bed for a week. My social interactions are a few days off being able to socialize and maybe do an activity or two. Then I do the total shutdown. Why? This leads me to just not be social and be in a state between. I can get it of bed but I'm not really leaving the house but for doctors appointments. I go out with friends once a month, maybe.
Work meetings are hell for me, especially if it's with clients that I've not worked closely with before. I start panicking that they can see something terrible about me. I was once very paranoid that I was smirking when I actually wasn't, but thought everyone on the zoom call could see that I was smirking.
wow ... today i came to know that's agoraphobia heard it for the 1st time .... but it makes sense now ... i have diagnosed with bpd .... but whenever i have to go to any unknown places or to meet with unknown people who are not strangers like office collegues..... than i feel so unsafe and unsecure and i used to call my fp but he never supported that even he said there isnt any issue so he feels like i m too needy .... 2ndly if i have to go in any social events i got seriusly sick just before the event, though i was excited for it but i have got the answer today .... thanks for the guidance
Great question, mine really took off when my my grand mother passed away, then a few months later I had a miscarriage, in Feb..then my sister's 2 step children drowned on mothersday in an under toe. And on Father's Day a month later my fiance drowned. I have not been normal since, a few yrs later my only sister was killed. It has changed me so profoundly and I can't seem to get the help I need. I appreciate so much these videos and chats as at least I see there are others who understand and I don't feel so alone In this insanity
Diagnosed at 43. PTSD, anxiety, severe depression, agoraphobia, etc. Watched Pete davidson from saturday night live describe bpd. Talked to dr a month later. Is been diagnosed by 3 drs. Was never told to me until i asked for my records checked by psychiatrist. Supposedly the diagnosis isn't good to have. They may have been trying to protect me when I was younger from any more stigma.dunno.
So this is why I can’t get off public transport... It frustrates me that I’m just learning about BPD and it would’ve saved me so much mental self destruction if this information was more broadcasted or smt...
🤔 Question: Is this "ACE" technique widely used and practiced in Mental Health Therapy? 😁 My greatest takeaway from this video in particular: People w/BPD experience a consistency in negative response. 😔 That would be a gross understatement for me. It is the fabric of my life it seems. I attribute all my foolishness to the horrible childhood I suffered endured and survived unspeakable tragedies no Human should ever face. 😖 I essentially trust No Humans, PERIOD!
At my worst after graduating highschool I would have a breakdown if my mom wanted me to leave my house let alone my room. I would stay in my room for hours until I got so hungry that I felt sick and so I would leave my room to eat and go to the bathroom and that's it. I dont know why I had two separate periods in my life where I would panic if I even thought about leaving my house. I dont suffer from these symptoms now but this is definitely interesting.
My grandson I believe has BPD we are in the process of introducing him to his new therapist today. He does not like at all being in large crowds, concerts or any loud noises as well.
I've been borderline agoraphobic for years. Triggered by a toxic relationship. I left and almost fixed it. Then I went back due to a huge abandonment trigger. Now it's back. It resulted in me researching what's going on with me, and him. I just ordered us your workbook hoping it will help us either fix our relationship or help us respectfully terminate it. I'm so lost 🤦🏼♀️💔
Omg I have bpd and thought I was the only one. and i been on home lock down since Feb my anxiety is to the roof if I have to go even to the supermarket I get crazy panic attacks and the supermarket its in front of my building :/ I live in NYC so its horrible
I'm afraid that once I get home, I'll be coming home to hell. I'll be coming home to getting kicked out. Because I didn't come home in time, or because I failed to do something before leaving. 😔
I can’t go grocery shopping without my mom. I have to show my mom important emails I compose to professors before I send them so I know I did it right. Casual conversation at work is hell. Co-curricular activities are a huge no. Being outside my house after seven at night without my mom, also a huge no. I go for walks and only go places I have to like my classes and work. At work, I keep conversation minimal but I mustn’t dissociate. I dissociate if I go into myself. I now avoid sharing information on group discussions because my TA will say “No, not what I’m looking for.” And don’t even get me started on the hell of group projects.
As far as showing you emails for proof reading: you can work on grammar and style writing to know how to do it yourself. They don’t teach grammar very well in school.
What's the difference between this type of extreme agoraphobia and Avoidant personality disorder? Because to me, having been diagnosed with both, advoidant first, what you've been refering to as agoraphobia in BPD is really whats known as AvPD.
So much of what you walk about is often sounding like people that have a diagnosis of BPD have had a LOT of childhood trauma. And why is BPD so different than they other personality disorders? Even the people that weren't found to have childhood trauma are, I believe seen to have had issues with attachment and low resilience to survive childhood. I just wonder if you ever feel like the diagnosis of BPD needs to be reexamined, like the work of Bessel Ven Der Kolk? It seems like his work may eventually change the landscape of analysis and diagnosis. I wonder if you ever think about this or have any reflection on these findings by Dr Van Der Kolk and others?
Thank you, Dr. Fox. It is very useful. I have BPD and I am learning new information. Things have changed from when I was first diagnosed. I am 47 and I was first diagnosed when I was @ 22 years old.
I don't like going outside or going to work because I'm constantly afraid everyone is judging my weight and overall appearance and evaluating/devaluing my worth as a human based on how I look and dress.
This is describing a family member perfectly. Someone told me that if she doesn't commit crimes she cannot have BPD but I guess that is not true. She does commit crimes but she does it on the low.
Over the past couple years I might leave the house for an appointment or to go for lunch with a friend. But going out exausts me. I had cancer 5 years ago. Fine now (fibromyalgia and stuff but nothing deadly). But since then I can't seem to cope with anything. Every interaction is exausting. Even texting sometimes. Also my abandonment fears and paranoia seems to be the highest it's ever been. I have cut people out abd isolated myself because my emotions are so out of control but mainly I cry a lot. I am in therapy though and it does help stabalaize me.
You may want to talk with a mental health professional about trauma reaction post cancer, it's a common reaction and experience. I am glad you're well now.
Wow... Us three children were my mom's FP. We missed at least 30 days of school a year per child just to accompany her outside the house to pay bills etc. I believe she went to court twice because we miss so much school and could have been put in jail. We fight the tendencies of not to stay in the house because we were taught this. I always thought my siblings and I had a strange shyness but I guess that's not what it is. We are very outgoing and the more people we work with in a public the more excited we become but we have to fight agoraphobia. So strange
I don’t know if I have ever been accurately diagnosed, but I thought I was just learning how to not trust anyone and rely completely on myself which has resulted in 90% of my time being in my room. I just figured that enough bad experience and loss of my self had just given me coping skills that made me antisocial but I think I completely fit this mold
Morgan L yeah that’s definitely a solo experience at the time, but after the majority of adaptations and getting a little bit more into life, I realize that my personality has completely changed from the me before. But I don’t mind
At last genetic science is studying agoraphobia for the genetic disorder that it is. Psychological anxiety is a different type of anxiety. Never confuse the two disorders. The Claire Weekes method is the only way to control the genetic disorder agoraphobia
This makes perfect sense. I am not scared of shopping malls, or market places, I kind of like those a little, makes me feel less lonely, even if I don't personally know the other people around me... But I am terrified of open spaces, and public transport. Strangely, I wasn't as terrified of public transport before, but since I have been in a toxic relationship I have developed that anxiety. How do I know for sure if someone is a psychopath or a narcissist? I have watched lots of videos about it, still feel confused. I am dealing with someone who confuses me to no end, seems to have so many different personalities, cold, loving, narcissistic, sadistic, nice, angry, makes no sense... Up and down all the time
OMG 😱 I was thinking 🤔 before the video started that I have generalized anxiety, but definitely not Agoraphobia. Thinking I love being outside of the house. Then I realized NO I don't like to go out with people other than my parents and my husband.
I have all of those anxiety types but I have CPTSD. Panic disorder. Also extreme separation issues but I don't think that's an actual title for a type of anxiety but it could be my BPD. Like one of the first things as a toddler that presented. I was also selective or another type of mute until I was middle school aged. I also have MDD, Bipolar 2, OCD, ADHD not specified, I have Excoriation and the hair pulling but I over groom. I have a pain disorder with medical and psychiatric factors somatic/psychogenic not specified I'm complicated grouped in the treatment resistant don't know what to do with experimental people. It's hard to tell if there's anything else or if all that's accurate. But throughout the years those all have been mentioned by different professionals. I've been diagnosed more than once for most these by different evaluation professionals. I'm extremely curious to hear what your thoughts are on so many diagnosees??? Is that even possible??? I fit the bill to the letter for each separately. But I love to know your thoughts and opinions, input, insight, etc. I'd appreciate it. I'm looking at probably Clozapine. But I'm complicated like I said. BTW TRAUMA STILL OCCURING IT NEVER ENDS.
It’s not paranoia. Paranoia is a misperception of what actually is seen and heard. Since there are cameras everywhere these days, even looking down from satellites your perception would be on the money, you may be less in denial than just anyone.
its so difficult to explain why i cant bring myself to go into a grocery store. Any store is hard to wàlk into alone, but the grocery store ........ OH MY GOD THE GROCERY STORE! SO MANY NEGATIVE EMOTIONS ASSOCIATED WITH THE GROCERY STORE. I have lost my damn mind in this small town grocery store more than any other place in my world. EVERY MELTDOWN IMAGINABLE....fist fights, broken things, thrown drinks, screaming, uncontrollable laighter, fainting, crying, paniced into circles, locked in the bathroom, walk away from a cart of groceries in checkout line & not come back. The social consequences of such have been far more detrimental due to the small town community. Everyone in my home town refers to me as crazy and has since forever. idk still if it is paranoia or if people really do whisper aboit me when i do bring myself to enter. i eat out to avoid the place.
You may find it beneficial to explore the issues and core Contant inside yourself the drives you to run away from situations in which you feel high anxiety or trapped in. Take care.
I’m extremely confused and it’s no wonder I cannot get properly assessed and was misdiagnosed with BDP. I think there must be 2 different versions of agoraphobia, perhaps falling under cluster B and Cluster C which sound different. I had agoraphobia for a few years but it was a maladaptive pattern to avoid panic attacks. The underlying issue was panic disorder and extreme physical symptoms I’d get.
I can't get enough of your videos! Now how can I get my agoraphobic loved one with borderline personality disorder traits to be less dependent and/or get treatment?
I get horrible social anxiety, physically shaking before i go somewhere, feeling sick while driving or like I'm going to pass out even when going somewhere i go all the time. What has helped me most with that is cbd. Also have emetephobia so when i'm at parties or around people drinking which is a lot because my boyfriend is a musician i'm in fight or flight mode, so I isolate a lot and stay home. Some exposure has desensitized me a little bit, having to hear people getting sick and getting sick myself a couple times this year. I obsess over it and sometimes when people cough even freak out.
I also have BPD and severe emetaphobia! It’s so rare! I’ve had it since childhood. Same with the sounds, etc. A therapist told me that it’s a fear of chaos and loss of control. I feel like people are dying when they are sick because they cannot control their body. Terrifying.
Omg this is so me right now! I had no idea that it could be something to do with my Borderline Personally Disorder. I used to be a fully functioning quiet borderline 2 jobs, school, gym, socialized and then my favorite person broke my heart and ghosted me and I became so depressed and overwhelmed I stopped caring about everything I dropped out of my life and went into hiding ... complete shut in mode... I can barely leave the house, I panic at the thought of going to the grocery store or any social event even with family, I’m always alone in my room feeling empty then I get anxiety about how I’m throwing my life away... how do I get rid of all this?? How do I fix it?? I don’t wanna be this way anymore 😞 I wanna be able to function like a normal person and socialize and have normal relationships no favorite person stuff no borderline, no anxiety, no ptsd, no agoraphobia idk how to fix it I fantasize about suicide constantly but I just can’t find it in me to just do it so how do I fix it
I hear you I am in the exact same boat keep your head up and take it one day at a time that's what I do
40 oz gaming thank you
If you have been diagnosed then please get therapy, even talk to therapists online or check out the suicide hotline/helpline website because they do aid people in matching them with the proper resources and you can even start from within your home and get help without feeling too overwhelmed being pushed to go out right away. I pray for your recovery and a happy New Year of possibilities. 💖💖💖💖
I am right here with you. Wishing us all better days.
Me!#!!
THIS WAS VERY MUCH NEEDED.
I have Bpd. I’ve always felt my agoraphobia stemmed from my body dysmorphia the worst it got the more I became a shut in.
I feel you... Hope you're well ♥️
Me too..
My mom retired from NASA, then shut herself in her house until she died. My grandma, same. I shut in after I unplugged my mom and covid kinda obfuscated my lock in. But I am so encouraged that I'm not as crazy or alone as I thought. You're a shining light, Doc. Please don't give up. Ive made the firm determination to end it here. My daughters have to be unburdened of the awful responsibility for an ill/ damaged parent.
Completely reclusive for over 2.5 years. If I do get out of the house for doctor appointments or absolutely have to be social on a rare occasion, the next day I am completely drained and need a recovery time. It sucks but I’m used to this way of life. My favorite person was murdered but I have a sweet dog to stay with me.
I call those "going out hangovers".
why is it that you always seem to post exaclty what it is I need? I don't leave the house because of agoraphobia AND HERE U ARE POSTING THIS I'm dead inside Dr fox you are my hero
Luci Archer i screeched at “i’m dead inside”
Omg yes I was just thinking why isn't anyone talking about agoraphobia and boom I see this video thank u Daniel.
Service dogs are a God send. They’re your companion and they help you stay calm .
I’ve been home bound for almost two years. Panic attacks literally stop me at my front door. I can’t leave my house.
@@raerae2589 Hey there. I'm almost completely homebound too. I do leave my house for walks. I used to be unable to do that.
I was diagnosed as a borderline, I have 9 of 9 diagnostic criteria symptoms
I can’t leave the house unless I’m dressed to the nines because people offend you less often when you look better and i am waaaaay to sensitive to perceived slights
I refuse all kinds of family get together as sports outings etc due to this anxiety.
Middle C I can definitely relate to this as I am the exact same way. I have missed so many family gatherings with my girlfriends family because of my BPD. I have a closet full of clothes and a ton of makeup but never feel that any of it is popping enough. No matter how good my girlfriend tells me I look, I usually always end up having a full meltdown and end up staying home. I too have all 9 symptoms of BPD.
Yessssss
Same here.
I also do this! I've found that sometimes folks find me stuck up. However it couldn't be less true. I think that dressing up somehow improves my low self esteem and increases my overall confidence in a much larger way than my peers
I did not realize that Agoraphobia and BPD overlapped like that. You just described me. Thank you for helping to make it understandable. You teach in such a way without judgement. I have struggled for years trying to understand the Agoraphobia and Borderline separately. Thank you for treating folks like us with respect and not treat us as losers and lepers.
Mm
I've had agoraphobia pretty much all my life, it seems no matter what I do personally I to some extent dread being in public spaces and avoid it like the plague. I am in my 30s now and feel the same as in my 20s on that.. it seems this stupid social anxiety refuses to leave me alone :/
I am constantly constantly singing "somebody's watching me" to calm myself down and remind myself how ridiculous it is that somebody's wants to watch me.
I am legally blind and have BPD, so getting around on my own often makes me very uneasy. I thank God for new apps that will deliver goods to your doorstep. I am able to avoid a great deal of anxiety. I go places with my husband and kids, but rarely go out on my own as much as most people do.
Clean houses, and care for pets...
And, you can avoid most of what triggers agoraphobia.
Sometimes, you have to laugh-
So as, not to cry 💜
Just curious how you got into both the pet sitting and house cleaning? Do you do on your own or with a company? How did you get started? I cannot hold down a traditional job.
Thanks
@@meekee1490 she watches the pet poop on the floor, then charges to clean. Good business model
I ROAM ALONE 😂
BPD housekeeper here lol 🙋🏼♀️🙋🏼♀️
The only downer to working alone all the time is getting too in your head on what I call “trigger happy days” but other than that I get to avoid soooo many other things. Hope today is good for you.
You are speaking me language. I have BPD plus generalized anxiety disorder, social anxiety disorder, and agoraphobia. Yes I have been diagnosed with all three anxiety disorders. Although my agoraphobia is very closely linked with my social phobia. I never leave my apartment, I rarely leave my bedroom. My social anxiety has gotten so bad that I find my self in my bedroom with my door closed and the curtains drawn and with headphones on still worrying about what people think of me. I know no one can see or hear me, but I am still overwhelmed with the thoughts of being judged.
Ive been going through that isolating myself self harm vary irrtable vary angry then full of energy then trying to keep the tires in not working making it worse were im telling my family members in the house keep ur voice down the nabors can hear u i havnt realized how bad i got i didnt want to tell fam cause i know the judge me but i did talk to a hotline and talking to them made me realize i need a little help like talk theropy and meds posib but please try it i will too don't let this stop u from living ur life theres so much more u are meant to change and help others
Me too all these diagnoses. Plus complex ptsd. Overwhelming and frustrating. Can’t seem to find a therapist around that knows what to do. And without being able to leave, kinda makes life worse
YES! it's that feeling of being judged and viewed as foolish, or stupid or whatever negative thought you can attribute I hate it SO much it runs through my mind nonstop when I am out and about and I can barely function. It reaches a point where all the internal monologue and stress of it all trying to put up the facade of being normal begins to cause me such anxiety I become irritable and it's kind of a buffer and protective mechanism to help me bear it
I wanted to say thank you Dr. Fox. My Mom was diagnosed as borderline and/ schizo-effective disorder. I saw similarities and i was self diagnosing myself as BPD. I have had 4 incredibly abusive ex relationships over 15 years, with what I believe were not well either, abusers alcoholic and a drug addict. I have a fear of true intimacy now. I think I have traits and some toxic coping skills that I have picked up in my life. I am 36 and finally healing. I finally see my BS and others objectively thank you Dr. Fox. I am dating a nice person, not abusive and kind. It doesn't feel normal, but I can not repeat this pattern.
Great job on doing it differently.
I feel paranoid like I have a thousand eyes on me every second that I'm outside of the house. Anxiety or agoraphobia?
I go through this too, as if everyone is watching me when I am out and about. I think it's a mix of both, the anxiety of being outside by ourselves brings on the agoraphobia.
I relate to this!
I have the same feeling, but I do have anxiety and am on the spectrum of Aspergers, (not yet diagnosed) but do not have BPD. I wear sunglasses a lot because of this...😣😎
Social anxiety disorder,I also feel like that.
This is so me! Haha :(
This dudes an exceptionally compassionate and GENIUS human being. Thanks for ur work
My pleasure
You are a rare talent Dr. So Gifted!
i'm thanking you already at 1:07 ! i was diagnosed 4 years ago with BPD and PPD (couldn't finish college because of paranoia) spent 2 years not being able to leave my house unless it was to go to my therapy and psychiatrist, and even with that i would only leave if one of my parents took me. before seeking treatment (ever since i can remember) i've always had social anxiety and the period of time i felt i could leave my house and "have fun" was when i was on drugs and alcohol.
EDIT: 8:20 exacly... isolating myself was the only thing that would make sense in my mind to stop interfering in other people's lives, to prevent hurting them and to deal with the pain and remorse.
You are not alone. ❤
I am SO GLAD I found this channel! I have spent my whole life in a dysfunctional family system and NOW I am recovering thanks to YOU! Much Appreciated!
I don’t know why this surprised me because my agoraphobia manifests in a way that directly impacts my terror of abandonment. Thank you for covering something I never would have expected.
Now to finish watching your video.
What is it when you have a phobia of using the phone? I getvsecere anxiety when I have to make a phone call sometimes I wont make the call when that wasn't an option
I'm so grateful the videos you make. I find so little information about my illnesses. I learn so much from your channel. Thank you for your time doing this.
Mine is linked to my IBS, if I will be stuck where I'm not near a bathroom , I won't go. Public transportation is out, I must sit near the door in meetings so I can get up if I need to without disturbing everyone.
Dr. FOX. THANK YOU! I have BPD and definitely battle with agoraphobia. Because of your videos my husband and I have gotten to a place to where we understand what's happening with me and have been dealing with it in a manageable way. We are trying hard to find a therapist that understands BPD like dr. Fox does.
Thank you for your videos. I've been diagnosed with BPD 5 years ago. I cannot participate in any therapy but your videos at least make me more conscious.
Just found this video…but man did you nail it dr.fox I believe I developed agoraphobia through my anxiety I haven’t been able to go to the mall or the downtown area of my city for years and depending on my stress level sometimes I can’t even go downstairs to my front door to get the mail. It sucks…I used to not always be like this and it’s caused me to lose friends and turn down dates…the only way I will go to anything is with my family and I have to drink or have headphones on because everything gets louder and if I hear someone laugh I think their laughing at me…I know it’s all in my head but it makes me just want to escape to hurry up go in and get out. Thank you for making this video dr.fox I’m improving so much thanks to you!
im a hermit, im working on it
Thank you Dr. Fox! Your videos have helped me understand what I have. When Im feeling bad I watch one of your videos and it makes me feel better. You are extremely smart!!! I appreciate your videos so much. It has helped my family understand me better as well as myself. I know my enemy now.
I am so glad they are helpful for you.
I realised my extreme anxiety which at one time turned into full blown agoraphobia before I knew of my bpd, thing is with my agoraphobia is that I didn't consciously want to avoid people/crowds and eventually cars and even leaving the house but my body and mind would go haywire, extreme panic shut down and only when I finally got home would it calm, it felt so strange that I could feel these things happening to me but have a part of me that is stepped back watching all this going this is bizzare and insane, lol, it was horrendous, it still is but not as often as it used to be when I was younger.
I laugh but it has ruined my life, I'm 40 now and was diagnosed with bpd this year, it explains alot but changes nothing, I'm now old, alone and full of regrets trying to come to terms with my chaotic wasted life, it's horrible to get to this age and realise you've been robbed of you're only shot at it.
You've still got 60 years babyyy
I'm 65 and I feel exactly the same.
@@natashagodfrey7775 well here's hoping anyway, I have been a lot better these last few years with medication and positive thinking and habits, feel like im enjoying life for the first time.
I came into some money recently also which will further allow me to do some of the things ive always wanted to do but was too messed up and couldnt focus.
It's been a horrible time the last few years too, suddenly losing my mother during covid, not being able to say goodbye nor have a funeral really hit hard but I was able to deal with it for the first time in my life I didn't break down, funny thing is she was diagnosed with bi polar disorder which we never knew about till her death, a very bizarre situation all round but her death I feel has placed more peices of the puzzle, it really explains a lot, to understand your own mother more through her death certificate is so odd.
Anyway I will travel and enjoy life for a while, let my creative side flourish, my mother was artistic and I get that from her as well as this weird and wonderful mind, lol.
It was a very complicated and rather difficult upbringing but she did the best she knew how but now I'm finally starting to live. R.i p shirley, maybe we'll meet again, maybe not either way I've got some living to do.
@@nylaclancy2655 I hope your able to get help and a medication that is right for you cause believe me things can change for the better, it's never going to be "normal" again but it can be better. Good luck to you.
You should check out the kids stories about reincarnation. It is mind blowing....
agoraphobia with panic disorder is caused by abandonment (extreme)
They are both different disorders. Agoraphobia is a genetic disorder. It is not psychological anxiety
@@robertrabbit7809 is it really.?? I didn't know that, Wow
Dr. Fox, Your videos are so very helpful, well thought out and informative. They give me hope and direction. Thank you.
Dr fox i wish I had you doing this videos years ago because I would have not gone through hell
And still.
Brave heart
Once I get out I do really well it's just obsessing about going that paralyzes and frustrates me...
t a me too.. I only have this fear when I’m thinking about going on. Once I’m out the fear is gone.
Me too..
I greatly fear my life continuing as a hermit. I refuse to give up. I won't give in. I will fight it but I fear my time is running out
I often feel angry at myself for my own irrational fears. Its a very limiting and lonely existence to be bound by your fears. Im working on it.
How are they irrational? Fear of irrational (unlikely) events, like getting struck by a meteor?
@@stephenpowstinger733 like social anxiety, there isnt anything rational about it ...
I believe there is a certain rationality (or reasonableness) about social anxiety. If, for example, you were painfully embarrassed in public once or you have a stutter or something, then that would be quite rational to have anxiety. I know. Public speaking used to mortify me but what is there to fear - except in getting overwhelmed and saying stupid or inappropriate things. ✋🏻
This was an eye opener for me. Where I once felt condemned because of wanting to be alone and secluded due to my anxiety I now understand why, finally. Gosh I wish there were more therapists out there like you who understand my condition. I feel its an illness that is still very much misunderstood.
Thank you for your comment. Be well and stay strong!!
Yes I have literally created my environment from working to shopping and yes if I don’t have to go outside I don’t I don’t really have any friends at all I don’t talk to anyone really but my kids also know and they are aware and they try to help me
I have been diagnosed BPD AND ALL 4 subtypes I fit. I have childhood until adulthood trauma, I had an open TBI in 1995 age 11 I’m 36 my left frontal lobe is dead and I have PTSD, specific phobias social phobia anxiety disorder and I have for the past over 10 years have dealt with all the things that fit angora phobia. I am not and have not been treated for it right yet none of it. It has petty much ended my whole life
This video was very eye opening to me. I have had several psychiatric professionals say many different things about what I “might” have but never an official diagnosis. One who I was seeing for 2 years said bi-polar 2 with depression and anxiety showing agoraphobic traits. Of course that’s not the words she used but that’s basically what it said in my records when I or them sent to the next person I seen. I’ve since learned that I definitely don’t have bi polar but more important I’ve learned that I’m no longer going to stress myself out on trying to find out “what’s wrong with me” by getting a diagnosis because still to his day I don’t have one. I do know I have BPD traits and I know DBT is the answer and for now depression and anxiety meds as well as a mood stabilizer are as well but I do hope that meds will not be in my life forever. I’ve learned so much recently from a 2 week intensive outpatient program that DBT is what I need to focus on and learning new ways of communication with interpersonal relationships, grounding tools and coping skills as well a mindfulness and not spend so much time on figuring out what my diagnosis is. So that’s what I’m doing now. Thanks to your videos I’ve learned so much about myself and gained a lot of knowledge in general. Thank you for what you do, I’m very grateful to you.
This video helps so much, It puts all the puzzle pieces together, my family thought I was just being dramatic but after having a major panic attack, melt down and intense fear of abandonment at the grocery store I knew something other than just the borderline disorder was hiding underneath the surface. The ACE strategy is so helpful
Thank you. I STILL don’t know what this DREAD of leaving my home is. It’s not always strong, but ever since lockdown, it is constant. I don’t recall being like this before, but I was a workaholic.
BPD traits (“quiet,” so I’ve read…I’ve never had anger issues, I get sad as sh&t, implode) seem to be taking over my existence, and it’s difficult to understand, let alone navigate, and advocate for yourself in our healthcare system. It all fits theoretically, but my mind doesn’t feel quite like my own any more, and the behaviors it seems to drive seem alien, too.
Thank you, Dr. Fox, for these videos. I still feel so “off,” but maybe having the terms correct & keeping my butt in therapy will give me the acceptance, insight & coping strategies I need to step out of this mental vortex of disquiet & stay out…
I'm glad these videos have been helpful to you! It's not uncommon to feel "off" during these times, but with the right support and strategies, you can definitely find your way out of that mental vortex. Keep going!
I’ve often wondered if when it is said that BPD eases up with age, it sometimes really means some of the wilder acting-out DSMish behaviors fall away (they’re exhausting) and might be replaced by the hermit phase, especially after retirement. Perhaps one is no less in the throes of one’s core BPD, but expressing it differently.
I was a recluse and spent so many of my younger years with myself and I eventually got out into the world and had to adapt to living with social anxiety and I suppose what may be BPD as it explains a lot of my behaviors. I think I may be the quiet BPD type as I hold in all my feelings. but now that I have gotten older, I just don't want to deal with being triggered anymore and want everyone to just go away.. but at the same time, I know it's not healthy for a person to isolate.. so it's a catch 22
Yes!!!! Older I get (54) the more the stress, anxiety, fear of leaving my house have started controlling my life whereas before it was more my emotions etc that controlled me
Thank you for sharing this. You really articulate a lot of the thoughts or feelings I have but never knew how to explain or pinpoint.
You are so welcome!
Dr Fox, *fist bump.*
You are tremendous Human Being.
Thank you for what you are achieving with these videos. You are extremely helpful, straight forward and I am learning so much from you.
I never noticed that I have agoraphobic traits, never would have known that my seclusion was due to more than abandonment issues. I'm so accustomed to being alone and not being able to rely on anyone that I've developed fears of being outside of my home alone.
I'm so sick of living with this disorder, but it's like I can't even get help from the people that have been dealing with my case. Two years of therapy and I haven't managed to get rid of any of the identifying traits.
It's hard, especially when someone you thought loved and cared about you keeps triggering your abandonment issues and just reinforces your suspicions.. It just seems I am destined to go life alone without anyone else
I've been struggling with both of this for so long. It makes sense now
I feel the same. I didn't know what the Agoraphobia was..I was diagnosed as paranoid with my Borderline Personality Disorder. Wow..this is really the first time (recently) I've investigated my disorders..it all makes sense now.
Damn.
I had this as a child before I even got close to knowing that I had bpd.
I’m glad that you found the video helpful and I wish you all the best
I was diagnosed with OCD at age ten. [Tangent, not agrophobia related, just peaked my interest when you said the statistics about anxiety disorders and BPD]
I'm 22 now, and in the process of finding out if I have BPD... Growing up with a disorder, it never occurred to me that I might have another. I also come from childhood neglect and domestic violence in adolescence/young adulthood, so volatility in some way has always been a part of my life. I've had all the symptoms of BPD for several years, but never knew what BPD was, and always wrote off my intense fear of abandonment as either somehow related to me having an anxiety disorder, or my past. I knew it wasn't OCD exactly because the anxiety I get when I think someone is leaving, is very different from my obsession-compulsive thoughts or patterns... But I had no other explanation. I have very strong reactive moods, but I knew I didn't have bipolar. I had a hard time ever maintaining therapy, because I usually feel hurt by the therapist in some way and back out. A few months ago I decided to try again, and I'm in the process of seeing a professional to evaluate my symptoms [not self-diagnosing], but I think BPD may have been what I've been dealing with. But the statistic was interesting to me having grown up with OCD and realizing later in life I may have BPD; I even knew before that people with one disorder may later on develop another one or have one concurrently, and still, I never considered I might ever have something else, so I think I accidentally blocked myself from getting help for a while. Thanks for sharing!
Amazing. I’ve had agoraphobia before I was diagnosed with bpd
I've never been diagnosed or treated but I'm nearly positive my father and I have BPD. I think the key to keeping my life intact has been creating stability whenever I can.
that's the thing, if your life is intact you don't have BPD, destruction is one of the criteria
@@anthonykonstantinou5378 alot of ppl with bpd have stable lives , jobs and relationships
@@showmethereal if you have all those things by definition you are not disordered
Thank you so much for this video!
This is so interesting! I reached out for help because of agoraphobia but as we kept on working with my therapist, we figured out that I have BPD traits. To be honest, I got used to my own instability so much that if it weren't for anxiety and panic attacks, I would've never asked for help.
You're very welcome. I'm glad the video was helpful. Be well.
I am diagnosed with severe agoraphobia, just turned 23 from age of 16 to March this year I had imprisoned my self without leaving house even once almost 8 year you won't see many worse cases and I now go out regularly so if I can do it any one can do it its all about baby steps
How on earth did you recover?? One year for me 🥵
Why do I compulsively call and text a woman to whom I am attracted? It only takes a few days before she never responds. I hate this BPD.
I have periods of being social then TOTAL withdrawal. I don't leave the bed for a week.
My social interactions are a few days off being able to socialize and maybe do an activity or two. Then I do the total shutdown.
Why?
This leads me to just not be social and be in a state between. I can get it of bed but I'm not really leaving the house but for doctors appointments. I go out with friends once a month, maybe.
Love your inner goodness, Sean!
Work meetings are hell for me, especially if it's with clients that I've not worked closely with before. I start panicking that they can see something terrible about me. I was once very paranoid that I was smirking when I actually wasn't, but thought everyone on the zoom call could see that I was smirking.
Imposter syndrome is very common. I get that sometimes too. It happens to all of us. Identify it and then build adaptive strategies to resist it.
Uh oh..This is EXACTLY my situation..🙄
Thankyou Dr Fox it can be hell as i have both BPD panic disorder . Generalised anxiety disorder have had it since childhood.
You're welcome. I hope you find relief.
wow ... today i came to know that's agoraphobia heard it for the 1st time .... but it makes sense now ... i have diagnosed with bpd .... but whenever i have to go to any unknown places or to meet with unknown people who are not strangers like office collegues..... than i feel so unsafe and unsecure and i used to call my fp but he never supported that even he said there isnt any issue so he feels like i m too needy .... 2ndly if i have to go in any social events i got seriusly sick just before the event, though i was excited for it but i have got the answer today .... thanks for the guidance
Did you ever talk about late onset borderline? I am 41 and have been acting borderline the past year triggered by trauma
Great question, mine really took off when my my grand mother passed away, then a few months later I had a miscarriage, in Feb..then my sister's 2 step children drowned on mothersday in an under toe. And on Father's Day a month later my fiance drowned. I have not been normal since, a few yrs later my only sister was killed. It has changed me so profoundly and I can't seem to get the help I need. I appreciate so much these videos and chats as at least I see there are others who understand and I don't feel so alone In this insanity
Diagnosed at 43. PTSD, anxiety, severe depression, agoraphobia, etc. Watched Pete davidson from saturday night live describe bpd. Talked to dr a month later. Is been diagnosed by 3 drs. Was never told to me until i asked for my records checked by psychiatrist. Supposedly the diagnosis isn't good to have. They may have been trying to protect me when I was younger from any more stigma.dunno.
I didn't expect that dope beat for the intro, but I welcome it
Who said TH-camrs can't have sick beats? I'm here to break stereotypes and bring the fire to my intros!
For example: Wanting to go for a walk to reduce stress, but can't face leaving the house
So this is why I can’t get off public transport... It frustrates me that I’m just learning about BPD and it would’ve saved me so much mental self destruction if this information was more broadcasted or smt...
🤔 Question: Is this "ACE" technique widely used and practiced in Mental Health Therapy?
😁 My greatest takeaway from this video in particular: People w/BPD experience a consistency in negative response.
😔 That would be a gross understatement for me. It is the fabric of my life it seems. I attribute all my foolishness to the horrible childhood I suffered endured and survived unspeakable tragedies no Human should ever face.
😖 I essentially trust No Humans, PERIOD!
Taylorcrawford Walker sorry to hear!
At my worst after graduating highschool I would have a breakdown if my mom wanted me to leave my house let alone my room. I would stay in my room for hours until I got so hungry that I felt sick and so I would leave my room to eat and go to the bathroom and that's it. I dont know why I had two separate periods in my life where I would panic if I even thought about leaving my house. I dont suffer from these symptoms now but this is definitely interesting.
My grandson I believe has BPD we are in the process of introducing him to his new therapist today. He does not like at all being in large crowds, concerts or any loud noises as well.
I've been borderline agoraphobic for years. Triggered by a toxic relationship. I left and almost fixed it. Then I went back due to a huge abandonment trigger. Now it's back. It resulted in me researching what's going on with me, and him. I just ordered us your workbook hoping it will help us either fix our relationship or help us respectfully terminate it. I'm so lost 🤦🏼♀️💔
Omg I have bpd and thought I was the only one. and i been on home lock down since Feb my anxiety is to the roof if I have to go even to the supermarket I get crazy panic attacks and the supermarket its in front of my building :/ I live in NYC so its horrible
This is really fantastic. Would really like to also see a video on BPD and identity issues in particular dysphoria. Seems to be epidemic these days.
I'm afraid that once I get home, I'll be coming home to hell. I'll be coming home to getting kicked out. Because I didn't come home in time, or because I failed to do something before leaving. 😔
I can’t go grocery shopping without my mom. I have to show my mom important emails I compose to professors before I send them so I know I did it right. Casual conversation at work is hell. Co-curricular activities are a huge no. Being outside my house after seven at night without my mom, also a huge no. I go for walks and only go places I have to like my classes and work. At work, I keep conversation minimal but I mustn’t dissociate. I dissociate if I go into myself. I now avoid sharing information on group discussions because my TA will say “No, not what I’m looking for.” And don’t even get me started on the hell of group projects.
As far as showing you emails for proof reading: you can work on grammar and style writing to know how to do it yourself. They don’t teach grammar very well in school.
@@stephenpowstinger733 oh it’s not for that but if it sounds professional enough
What's the difference between this type of extreme agoraphobia and Avoidant personality disorder? Because to me, having been diagnosed with both, advoidant first, what you've been refering to as agoraphobia in BPD is really whats known as AvPD.
So much of what you walk about is often sounding like people that have a diagnosis of BPD have had a LOT of childhood trauma. And why is BPD so different than they other personality disorders? Even the people that weren't found to have childhood trauma are, I believe seen to have had issues with attachment and low resilience to survive childhood.
I just wonder if you ever feel like the diagnosis of BPD needs to be reexamined, like the work of Bessel Ven Der Kolk? It seems like his work may eventually change the landscape of analysis and diagnosis.
I wonder if you ever think about this or have any reflection on these findings by Dr Van Der Kolk and others?
Thank you, Dr. Fox. It is very useful. I have BPD and I am learning new information. Things have changed from when I was first diagnosed. I am 47 and I was first diagnosed when I was @ 22 years old.
You are very welcome
I don't like going outside or going to work because I'm constantly afraid everyone is judging my weight and overall appearance and evaluating/devaluing my worth as a human based on how I look and dress.
2:44 so proud of Agoraphobia to finally be able to stand on its own!! 🏆
Thanks for this very interesting video. I find myself rewatching it.
Glad you enjoyed it!
I love this channel so much.
+Hads thanks for saying that 😊.
This is describing a family member perfectly. Someone told me that if she doesn't commit crimes she cannot have BPD but I guess that is not true. She does commit crimes but she does it on the low.
What a horrible misconception of BPD! Thankfully it's not true at all
Over the past couple years I might leave the house for an appointment or to go for lunch with a friend. But going out exausts me. I had cancer 5 years ago. Fine now (fibromyalgia and stuff but nothing deadly). But since then I can't seem to cope with anything. Every interaction is exausting. Even texting sometimes. Also my abandonment fears and paranoia seems to be the highest it's ever been. I have cut people out abd isolated myself because my emotions are so out of control but mainly I cry a lot. I am in therapy though and it does help stabalaize me.
You may want to talk with a mental health professional about trauma reaction post cancer, it's a common reaction and experience. I am glad you're well now.
@@DrDanielFox thank you.
this was very helpful, thank you.
“…escape might be difficult or help might be hard to find…” my life for the last 5 years..I’ve been a recluse for this exact reason.
Wow... Us three children were my mom's FP. We missed at least 30 days of school a year per child just to accompany her outside the house to pay bills etc. I believe she went to court twice because we miss so much school and could have been put in jail. We fight the tendencies of not to stay in the house because we were taught this. I always thought my siblings and I had a strange shyness but I guess that's not what it is. We are very outgoing and the more people we work with in a public the more excited we become but we have to fight agoraphobia. So strange
Thank you for sharing your story. Your strength is truly inspiring.
Thankyou for your knowledge.
I love all your videos and I Wish You were my Dr, because I feel like nobody gets me.
I don’t know if I have ever been accurately diagnosed, but I thought I was just learning how to not trust anyone and rely completely on myself which has resulted in 90% of my time being in my room. I just figured that enough bad experience and loss of my self had just given me coping skills that made me antisocial but I think I completely fit this mold
Me too... Omg it feels so good to not be the only one ☝🏻
Morgan L yeah that’s definitely a solo experience at the time, but after the majority of adaptations and getting a little bit more into life, I realize that my personality has completely changed from the me before. But I don’t mind
@@sarahmerrill2512 it sounds more like complex PTSD. Isolation rather than agarophobia.
raven9ify I am surprised that you said that because I have been watching a lot of videos about that lately and it is very much closer
@@sarahmerrill2512 wish you all the best on your road to recovery and getting that control back in your life.
At last genetic science is studying agoraphobia for the genetic disorder that it is. Psychological anxiety is a different type of anxiety. Never confuse the two disorders. The Claire Weekes method is the only way to control the genetic disorder agoraphobia
How about a video on bpd as the most or one of the most stigmatized illnesses? Not sure if you touch on that.
I do in my video on Hope and BPD: th-cam.com/video/pjWxRjlE1tU/w-d-xo.html
This makes perfect sense. I am not scared of shopping malls, or market places, I kind of like those a little, makes me feel less lonely, even if I don't personally know the other people around me... But I am terrified of open spaces, and public transport. Strangely, I wasn't as terrified of public transport before, but since I have been in a toxic relationship I have developed that anxiety. How do I know for sure if someone is a psychopath or a narcissist? I have watched lots of videos about it, still feel confused. I am dealing with someone who confuses me to no end, seems to have so many different personalities, cold, loving, narcissistic, sadistic, nice, angry, makes no sense... Up and down all the time
Sounds like you have good insight. That’s a powerful thing. Be well.
OMG 😱 I was thinking 🤔 before the video started that I have generalized anxiety, but definitely not Agoraphobia. Thinking I love being outside of the house. Then I realized NO I don't like to go out with people other than my parents and my husband.
I’m glad the video provided you insight and I wish you all the best.
I have all of those anxiety types but I have CPTSD. Panic disorder. Also extreme separation issues but I don't think that's an actual title for a type of anxiety but it could be my BPD. Like one of the first things as a toddler that presented. I was also selective or another type of mute until I was middle school aged. I also have MDD, Bipolar 2, OCD, ADHD not specified, I have Excoriation and the hair pulling but I over groom. I have a pain disorder with medical and psychiatric factors somatic/psychogenic not specified I'm complicated grouped in the treatment resistant don't know what to do with experimental people. It's hard to tell if there's anything else or if all that's accurate. But throughout the years those all have been mentioned by different professionals. I've been diagnosed more than once for most these by different evaluation professionals. I'm extremely curious to hear what your thoughts are on so many diagnosees??? Is that even possible??? I fit the bill to the letter for each separately. But I love to know your thoughts and opinions, input, insight, etc. I'd appreciate it. I'm looking at probably Clozapine. But I'm complicated like I said. BTW TRAUMA STILL OCCURING IT NEVER ENDS.
I would like to see a video on BPD with AvPD comorbidities
It’s not paranoia. Paranoia is a misperception of what actually is seen and heard. Since there are cameras everywhere these days, even looking down from satellites your perception would be on the money, you may be less in denial than just anyone.
TBH, I just consider it hyperarousal/hypervigilence. Heightened senses for improved self preservation. PTSD anxiety is factual rather than imagined.
coup de grâce I relate. It is hell
The plot thickens. Not jumping to any conclusions. This is not to do with me but with someome else .
I’m glad you found the video helpful
its so difficult to explain why i cant bring myself to go into a grocery store. Any store is hard to wàlk into alone, but the grocery store ........ OH MY GOD THE GROCERY STORE! SO MANY NEGATIVE EMOTIONS ASSOCIATED WITH THE GROCERY STORE. I have lost my damn mind in this small town grocery store more than any other place in my world. EVERY MELTDOWN IMAGINABLE....fist fights, broken things, thrown drinks, screaming, uncontrollable laighter, fainting, crying, paniced into circles, locked in the bathroom, walk away from a cart of groceries in checkout line & not come back.
The social consequences of such have been far more detrimental due to the small town community. Everyone in my home town refers to me as crazy and has since forever. idk still if it is paranoia or if people really do whisper aboit me when i do bring myself to enter. i eat out to avoid the place.
It can be quite triggering. Be well.
I have an obsession with running away from situations I can't get out of
You may find it beneficial to explore the issues and core Contant inside yourself the drives you to run away from situations in which you feel high anxiety or trapped in. Take care.
I’m extremely confused and it’s no wonder I cannot get properly assessed and was misdiagnosed with BDP. I think there must be 2 different versions of agoraphobia, perhaps falling under cluster B and Cluster C which sound different.
I had agoraphobia for a few years but it was a maladaptive pattern to avoid panic attacks. The underlying issue was panic disorder and extreme physical symptoms I’d get.
I can't get enough of your videos! Now how can I get my agoraphobic loved one with borderline personality disorder traits to be less dependent and/or get treatment?
As within, so without. If you're confused about yourself, how can you not be confused about people surrounding you.
That's a great point! Understanding ourselves is definitely a key to understanding others.
I get horrible social anxiety, physically shaking before i go somewhere, feeling sick while driving or like I'm going to pass out even when going somewhere i go all the time. What has helped me most with that is cbd. Also have emetephobia so when i'm at parties or around people drinking which is a lot because my boyfriend is a musician i'm in fight or flight mode, so I isolate a lot and stay home. Some exposure has desensitized me a little bit, having to hear people getting sick and getting sick myself a couple times this year. I obsess over it and sometimes when people cough even freak out.
I also have BPD and severe emetaphobia! It’s so rare! I’ve had it since childhood. Same with the sounds, etc. A therapist told me that it’s a fear of chaos and loss of control. I feel like people are dying when they are sick because they cannot control their body. Terrifying.