Divorce Lawyers Give Relationship Advice | Glamour
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 12 มิ.ย. 2024
- It's estimated that about half of marriages end in divorce. Why are so many people getting divorced, and how can you prevent splitting up with your spouse? We asked four divorce lawyers what they've learned in their practice on how to keep your marriage alive.
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Divorce Lawyers Give Relationship Advice | Glamour - บันเทิง
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To sum up what they said. Dont marry the person you think your partner will one day become, but marry the person they are right now. Too many people fall in love with a fictional version of their partner and that is why they get surprised and hurt when that person never materializes. You are not training a dog, you are spending your life with an individual and if you want to change that individual in significant ways, then it means you dont really respect them and your marriage is doomed.
Don Parkison that’s right!👍🏾
Yep! Marriage is not rehab.
Well said.
a very eye-opening comment
Amen to that
"I still get teary eyed in weddings". Well duh, those might be some future clients.
GreekFreakyJoker lmao I don’t think that’s why!
GreekFreakyJoker umm hmm! In his head rubbing his hannnnds .... like Birdman (squawww) 🤣
Ok. This is funny!!! 😂
GreekFreakyJoker so funny
Two beautiful dollar signs getting married 😢😭
When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
@C. Lord exactly once they show the signs and repeated actions that’s a time to show it’s time to go
Follow your intuition and don't ignore the red flags!
Heard this before and it's so true. Trust your instincts..
I don’t mean to sound condescending but I never understood how people have a hard time believing this? I know how easy it is to idealize someone but at some point, you have to look at reality in the eyes and see things what they really are.
Everyone has good and bad sides ,you just need to realise if you can live with it
If you wouldn't want that person as a roommate, don't marry them. This one thing would eliminate a fair number of divorces.
True and maybe to help see in the future live with them for a while and seriously observe traits and quirks they have that bother you and communicate on it. If they won’t change it’s a sign you are better off as friends or benefits type ones that only show love but can’t stay in one room for a long committed time. An I think that is easier then lying and try working things out of truly neither person can do better. An honestly I think some people have own issues that are meant to probably be solved on their own and not need help by others so that’s a thing too. It’s all about communication and maturity if you can’t handle the truth that you shouldn’t be married at that said time period or never in the future if you can’t grow then it’s better off not dating .
@@mimil.2606 Yeah, essentially people don't change. Often people are blinded by attraction, and choose to overlook red flags. People can learn and change little things if they're open to it, but basing all your hopes on your partner changing is not a good sign. Being happy with someone as they already are is a good indication that they might be a good match. If not, pass.
I’ve heard cohabitation before marriage is bad but at the same time how else are you going to know you’re compatible, I guess spend occasional weekends together. I’ve heard of some married couples that sleep in separate beds. Doesn’t mean the marriage is going bad, just different sleeping habits.
@@charliedallachie3539 I agree.
@Nathan Taffijn I know that I wasn’t saying it’s ok to change people I was explaining why some people may do that it could just be a coping mechanism. When unable to take the heartbreak of breaking up but you have to accept it and you can’t try being a hero and think you can help everyone boyfriend girlfriend whatever they are to you if given consent you shouldn’t step over that line.
Jokes aside, they’re dishing out solid, reasonable advice.
Yeah, its better than the married therapist.. they said the reality
Tiel Noembreux it’s true
It's pretty common sense advice
Joe S obvious to you but maybe not to all. Not that people are stupid, they are just clouded in the situation.
c. l. And its pretty common sense to not marry so...
I’m so single I don’t even know why am I watching this
hahaha me too plus im 17😅😅
Well allot of their advice is who or what to marry.
We can start something:P
Andrei2000PC tone back the desperation bro
Cute
This needs to be featured in women's magazines much, much more, instead of the wedding dresses, cakes and rings. Is it romantic? No. But it could save many marriages.
It doesnt oil up the economy so prolly its a hard no.
@@haraldhwick thinking the same
@@haraldhwick Shhhh I'm studying to be a divorce lawyer.
Not just women's magazines men's too. Instead of the ridiculous pick up artist nonsense.
Not just save marriages but by creating a more stable and realistic approach in relationships looking to take the next step.
"Doing a prenup forces couples to talk about finances before they get married". Great advice because most couples don't talk about money before getting married. This should include a financial disclosure to reveal any and all hidden debt. And that includes student loans and credit card debt.
Really, I'm not married or live with my partner but we know our financial situation. Why is it hard for people to talk about it ? (Curious)
@@missantrafalgar782 in my opinion, most people don't talk about finances because we have been programmed to think it's a private matter, and in most cases that's a wise decision. However, when you get married your finances are no longer private. Because you entered into a partnership/contract.
Benjamin Franklin famously advised fire-threatened Philadelphians in 1736 that “An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.”
When we say that prevention is better than cure, it essentially means that it is better to stop something before it happens instead of having to repair it or deal with its consequences after it has already been done.
That proverb was applied and practiced in 1736 and it is still relevant today
Then most marriages probably wouldn't happen.
These things can and will be thrown out if needed to, and mostly men are the breadwimners as wen tend to marry up to take care of the "children and the house", so yeah a 100% losing game, you win if you get a 50%50% and that is considered a fairytail thing.
@@The_DLK even with a strong prenup?
It must be so awkward for these lawyers to be invited to weddings.
BenDizzy19 “what side of the family are you?”
“Oh I’m a friend of the bride and groom”
“Cool, what do you do for a living?”
“... I’m a divorce lawyer.”
•o•
Abby Lol he can say he’s a lawyer
LMAO wouldn't want one coming anywhere near a marriage. Just looking at them would prolly give u doubts and cause u to ? the future.
#Check out the Netflix show Adam Ruins Everything. Its great:)
They love it.....cuz that’s a potential client right there they be handing out business cards left n right
Don't only judge a potential husband/wife by how they treat you. Look just as much at how they treat others. A few years down the line when the honeymoon period is over they are likely to treat you the same way.
💯 filed under: "things I wish someone had told me when I was young" 😔
Are you married sir?
That's actually very good
Luckily my wife treats her friends with much love and care
And they adore her for it, as do I ...
My parents have been married for 60 years. Their example was respect, mutual interests, similar goals, a good sense of humor, respect, commitment, intelligence, wisdom, and above all, respect.
I love that you listed respect 3 times. Exactly right! I always say the 2 things you need for a happy marriage (and I'm in one for 14 years now) is mutual respect and true commitment to the marriage. But the other things you listed are so important too...(especially a sense of humor!)
@@TaraSmiles7 After writing I realized that I hadn't mentioned love. But then I reasoned that love is probably the natural byproduct of these other qualities and many others, of course. My parents love each other dearly, but I know they do because of how they manifest that love..
Yes but there were better women back then.
Heavy Haul I agree that both women and men need to be reminded of how they are actually supposed to act in a marriage contract.
They LIED
A marriage like that is BS
I got married later and looked for a man that has the qualities to be a good husband, leader and father. Romance is important but so is being practical. Today I'm happily married.
Great advice
If you ever get divorced, let the comment section know.
Love❤❤❤❤❤
Feel free to give me advice.
What woman doesn't want this? You actually said nothing
"Marry well and you'll be happy. Marry badly and you'll become a philosopher,"- Socrates
🙄 🤔...
Did he actually say this? I can’t imagine Socrates saying this lmao
He did indeed: "By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher."
Don't marry and become an everyday millionaire....
😌😌
A thread: divorce lawyers make great marriage counselors
No they don't. Their business is for you to get a divorce.
@@Le.K established divorce lawyers know there's plenty of people who'll marriage and divorce to keep their practice going. They don't care if they lose a few, if that means giving out solid advice based on their experiences over the years.
@@Le.K So if they give out bad advice for marriage their business is just gonna go stonks?
@@Le.K He means they see the real deal problems of what made people feel they had to make such a huge decision to get divorced, so they have good insight to what to avoid and solve problems maybe before they're unsolvable
So let's put them out of business by not getting married in the first place.
everyone needs to watch this.." people don't change MUCH after marriage"
Woman want men to change after marriage, men want woman to stay the same...
@@sabinawickforsen6923 idk what's with people and making them change, it hard to change someone it's easier to change what's in you
@@cocablack Often the people who are willing to change themselves are well aware of their own issues. The ones who won't change are the ones who think they are perfect the way that they are. Which is absolute bollocks. We are all imperfect and we all learn to become better, if your significant other doesn't have that growth mindset then don't marry that person. It's an absolute waste of time and you'll lose everything because if they are selfish for their own benefits then they will be selfish when it comes to yours
Well I'm definitely changed and he stayed the same. Married a narcissist
“An exciting girlfriend or boyfriend might not make a good spouse.” and “you marry who you dated.” Solid gold right there. In my very little experience, everyone I know that has been divorced always think their spouse will change when married and it never happens.
I've never been engaged, but I've heard similar advice many times.
Last girlfriend wanted to be everyone's friend, had to have dinner parties every other weekend.
She got on my nerves very fast !
Lies again? Educating Couples Ezlink Card
@@NazriB Who are you to say those were lies? Maybe those things were true. I think you're just trolling.
The first lawyer is really smart, well spoken, tv type of person. I could spend an hour listening to hem. He should start his own TH-cam channel
Totally!
Same!!!!!
Agreed
Agreed
Areej Al-Mubark He indeed has an TH-cam channel! He's James J Sexton and also replied to another comment here, but I can't seem to find it.
Why am I getting recommended this? I am a twelve year old seventh grader.
3 12 better to learn early lol!
Life is complicated and youtube is preparing you.
Teach em while they are young
You're a good target 🎯 audience for this hunny... Better know this shitz as young as possible
Stay private on the internet for your own safety, youngin.
Look at those suits. Business is booming.
Lmao 😂
Oh goodnesses 🤣😂
Lmfao that was funny man 😂
HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!
Facts
I married someone I wanted growing up. Someone who has a plan, is supportive and loving, pushes me to be better, treats his parents and friends with respect as well as not friends with shady people, a GOOD Father, there is more. Also, I realized if I wanted that I needed to be that so I worked on myself. He's more than I asked for and appreciate him Soo much I also realized I'm glad he is someone who is willing to sit down and talk about serious things and how we as a couple can resolve it.
"...if I wanted that I needed to be that so I worked on myself."
That's such a great piece of advice so many people forget...and congratulations!
So what did you bring to the table?
In a simple way you married/trapped a simp after banging the entire town
@@eruditeindian7662 freak lmao
@@helen8602 mind your own business you freaking woman.
Why am I watching this- I’m not even in a relationship 😂.
Educate yourself for the future
I’m gonna be single forever......😭
Sad.. 😂
Me too 😂😂
relationship advice doesn't have to be limited to romantic relationships. 🤷🏽♂️
*"53% of marriages end in divorce in New York state"*
I bet Ross Geller made quite the contribution
dramione stan best comment on here hands down
hands down to the best comment 😂😂😂
Hahaha 😂😂😂
WE WERE ON A BREAK!!!
@@Anish23420 Hahaha, touchie 😂😂
Only marry someone you would trust during a divorce
I recently got divorced and this is great advice lol 👍
@@NeenaBeena why did you divorce
THIS IS PROFOUND
I would not trust myself during a divorce.
@@susieqhayes1 Same.
Biggest thing I learned is to not get too comfortable. Stay in shape, eat healthier, and don't put yourself down. You will be in a better mood once you take accountability for where you're at.
I've never been in a marriage situation yet it sounds so relatable.
Can we talk, please? If you don't mind of course.
This is solid advice and it doesn't even apply to marriage solely.
Why am I watching this and I've never had a boyfriend?
You??? You look so pretty
Preperation
You want a gf? 😍
The literal thought that just ran threw my head. Lol
Same sis..same
“Marriage is expensive, and for that reason I’m out” - Barbara shark tank
Hi, I’m out and for that reason I’m Jenny.
@@nuck- i was going to comment the same hahah
Yes
Yooooooooooooooooo
LMAOOO
The day we got married was definitely the happiest day of my life...still married and in love 20 years later....
I am legitimately very happy for you. I hope one day to find that same level of happiness.
i WANT THAT!!!
So was i until the 25th yr when i got cheated on. It can happen anytime.
You hit the lottery that the guy was talking about, congrats!!!
So why you watching this video?
Marriage is like saying "I love you soo much, I wanna get the gorvenment involved"
😂😂😂 That’s funny! And a great way to put it.
This is the most accurate statement.
No, it's to become their legal next of kin. You aren't "related" to your mate when you aren't married to them. Duh.
@@TheRibofJESUS oh yes its government that decides family not any thing else more important..... ya need some Jesus.
@@jareddegen9937 Your comment is foolish to me. If marriage was never legally binding, people could just constantly lie about their "relationship status", abandon their families, and do whatever when it comes to anything pertaining to family. Also, a marriage certificate is a public record so people can know if the person they are dating is in another relationship or not, whereas if it didn't exist, people would have no way to truly know. Strong families with the same last name wouldn't even exist.. It's really not that complicated to understand. The "lgbtq" community were fighting for a right to get married for a reason, even though I don't agree with them.
Now that I think about it, a prenup doesn’t sound that awful or selfish. In a way it’s making sure that you don’t have the burden of your spouses debt
Right!!
Ive always hated when someone started barking about a prenup, but now I understand it better. And I absolutely think differently! 🤷
I never saw why it was that big a deal
It means you don’t think either of you are going to last, and you’re already preparing for a divorce.
Except it can easily be ruled out in court if deemed unfair.
Faizaan Naseem having kids out of wedlock is statistically a disaster. I’ll happily not take that advice. That only works for couples who don’t want children. You CAN’T compare marrying someone to going into war. You don’t trust people in a war not to at shoot you, you expect it. But you should not prepare for your partner to backstab/cheat. Just don’t get married if you’re that insecure
My parents both studied law and they used to give out a book called "Die rechtlichen Folgen der Ehe"(The legal consequences of marriage) as engagement presents.
🤣
hipsepipse your parents are German?
Can I get a copy of the book?
Haha perfekt 😂
Genau
Marriage is a legal contract, take it seriously. Also, never sign a contact with someone who is dishonest. Knowing his/her finance is the most important thing before getting married.
Exactly! It's a contract to be with a person who can turn on you at any moment.
@@badgerden7080 that part
Men, do not hesitate for one moment to put a restraining order against your female partner if you feel your safety and health is in jeopardy. Placing a permanent restraining order on my female partner was absolutely the wisest protective move of my adult lifetime. My only regret is not doing it years earlier. Men, be safe!
An ex-wife of one of my brothers used to regularly punch and scratch him, even broke his arm once. Police didn't care. My mom and dad discovered none of the domestic violence counseling centers in our part of the state would take a male client. Took a family intervention to get my brother out but he still lost his house (he paid for). Our society has abandoned men.
@Nikhil 7 .......Yup...... I make my mother mow her own grass now.
I don't think it exists in india. So I spread awareness about narcissism.
good men is always safe.
or just invite Ted Buddy over for dinner...he will solve the problem for you...
1. Understand that marriage is a serious legal commitment
2. Know exactly what you want in a spouse, and realize they may not change
3. Definitely talk about your finances
4. An exciting girlfriend or boyfriend might not make a good spouse
5. If you do have to get a divorce, try to stay calm
He just said that
Ha 50% husbands money for giving a shot
@@souos-4701 Yeah, but in case no one wants to watch the whole video (lol) , KennyK here gave us the points. It's faster to read.
Edit: sure, you might miss the rest they mentioned, but for some, these points are enough)
@@nothumanff5900 well that’s what prenup is for.
Thanks! I was looking for this hehe
Be their cheerleader and be connected to them. That means: Empathy and understanding. Not narcissisism or selfishness.
It's weird! A marriage should be about making each other better and working to improve you as a whole.
Jojo Jo if they can do that, they don’t need divorce
@@wintersolstice4793 of course but everyone has their flaws that CAN be worked on. Like mine? My parents way of communicating was yelling. My now husband never communicated that way and I would often over step my boundry by yelling at him. It took someone who loved and understood me to open my eyes on that type of behavior and now you'd never see me communicate that way. For example.
I'm selfish. I truly understand that right now i can't be in a relationship. Which is some ways kinda sad, but also sobering to recognize my fatal flaw.
Nice
My dad was a lawyer and doing divorces took a bad emotional toll on him. He ended up avoiding divorce law at all costs
Another advice: being like-minded in morals, faith, principles *BEFORE* marriage helps.
One litmus test like: "can men and women be 'just friends'?" opens up a discussion on where that person stands. Saves time and prevent a lot of heartaches and headaches.
Do you think men and women can be friends? Also what gender do you identify as?
"You don't even get a pamphlet". Same with a baby.
At least licenses are required for marriage though!
You don't get a birth one, get one free when you get twins.
Just marry under Islamic laws, both sides get there rights and no more
I really hate that excuse because there are books, research, articles, magazines, videos, movies, documentaries, etc. etc. etc., And they're all mostly easily accessible if you have the internet.
And immigration to europe
It’s funny because these lawyers are giving advice to reduce divorces, which could hurt their future business. Kudos to them for actually doing this.
Just like doctors, I guess. They’ll be there when we need em.
Their advice was also aiming at
1. making sure there is still business in for them
2. and that you don't make their life too hard.
dan McClaren contrary to popular belief everyone isn’t necessarily out there to screw people over. Also, marriage law will still continue to exist regardless of divorce rates
They know no one is gonna listen... they won't lose clients people will continue being fools for love unfortunately.
W a 53% rate of something almost all people partake in happen. I’m sure the Business is just fine lol
"A good bf/gf may not make a good spouse" understated advice
4:18 Oh I loved his last piece of advice, Hold onto that sense of being your wife/husband's cheerleader.
Its true that supporting and encouraging each other is how your individual growth brings the two of you closer, not pushes you apart.
It's true what about a cheating partner
I think the fact that nobody has any concept that marriage and engagement are a signed contract is wierd. as the lawyer said, people think choosing the cake is more important than the financial contract they are signing and how it can affect their lives..
Exactly!!!! I always told my mom I don't see myself marrying anyone. She always said "I will change my mind" or "don't you want to walk down the aisle in a beautiful dress".😑 Mind you she's been divorced twice already and wants to get married again. I always told her that marriage is nothing but a contract and signing a paper as a sign of love, is stupid.
well, seeing people around you getting divorce isn't really making you want to get married that's for sure.
Marriage is something pushed so often in the media as being all about beauty and love. Of course the first thing in peoples mind’s isn’t a contract, especially if they’ve never been married before
midnighteevee I think it has more to do with what you experience in real life. My parents have a wonderful marriage and my grandparents had a wonderful marriage so I see how marriage is a great thing with the right person. If all I knew was divorce growing up then I’d probably think differently.
Engagement isnt a contract. You can call it all off at anytime. It just disappointing that you got that far and someone didnt want to do it
"Marriage is a lottery worth trying....."
Spoken by a guy who makes his living out of divorces.
This ensures his business continuity 😂 without marriage there will be no divorce, no divorce means no business for him 😅
Anna Rivera what's it called?
#MonoIsHere - I love you Seoul divorce corp
I look at it like a casino for the divorce lawyers. You enter in a casino on your own accord just like you would enter a marriage on your own accord.
A mortician could say life is worth living...
When Allah shows you the true colours of some person,then don't even try to paint a different picture of them.
It's that simple.
Ms. Linda's energy gave me: "I'm over it, I'm tired of these people coming here - please listen to us so I can go on vacation. Y'all stressful." 😂
Got it aunty 💖
I’m actually shocked that Glamour did this. I thought it was pretty insightful, and I’ve never seen this idea anywhere else.
mgtow
It's done in a lot of places but yeah unexpected for Glamour
Hello Sara
You should never ignore the red flags while dating if you don't want to get screwed in the future. Don't jump right away for marriage, just take it slow, and make sure that you're on the same page with your partner.
COUGH ariana grande COUGH
A New Love Official Exactly. Love is a thin between love and hate. If you don’t feel either emotions, the marriage won’t last.
Seems like for every behaviour your date does, there is an article saying that it’s a red flag.
"i need this damaged person in my life" said 54%
Just marry under Islamic laws, both sides get there rights and no more
I blame Disney. All of these early princess cartoons teaching girls to find their perfect prince charming, which is usually the same generic person through every movie (how many times have we heard "Ugh, all guys are the same"., "You're so much like my ex"., "I just wish I could find someone different"). The problem is they keep going for the same type of dude and yet wonder why they constantly are getting heart broken. That's early programming. Also notice how most Disney princess movies end with the wedding and happily ever after. Even after knowing the prince for a short amount of time. I guarantee that if they had sequels, it'd be a whole different story
You're awareness is right on track. Respect.
Well, they marry princes (ot the first guy who comes around), and they save them (oftentimes risking their own lives). Disney princes are not the main characters. You're not supposed to get to knoww them. But you are supposed to see they're worth it. It's not real life. It's a tale! They tell you the story with symbols.
I agree- not everybody has the personality or maturity to be in a marriage. There is nothing wrong with being single but Disney movies don’t focus much on single characters.
Disney gives impressionable young women a misrepresentation of men in the same way pornography gives impressionable young men a misrepresentation of women.
!!!!! VERY GOOD!!!!!
I'm still madly in love with my husband. After 10+ years together & 4 kids, I wouldn't trade him for the world.
10+ years? Give it time.
Glad for you
May GOD protect your love.
@@lifesabeach5405 I bet you're wrong. I wouldn't be here if he didn't. I'm a catch and he knows it.
You are one of the few lucky ones if you can say the same thing in 20 years time.
I could watch an hour of this.
literally
there literally is an hour of this th-cam.com/video/-iXwkwIEIbI/w-d-xo.html
Especially the James Sexton comments : really good insight.
Im ur no 1k comment liker wohooooo
Yeah you don’t want to spend 500 bucks to see them in person
My parents have been together 35 years since they were 22; They grew up in the 70's. Observing them I realize that you have to accept and love the other person. I observed that they forgave easily, spoke honestly, and often diffused tension with humor. Both were willing to lose some (even if they were right), because at the end of the day they love each other, and no petty thing topped that sentiment. Lastly, the respect they show each other is probably the most striking thing about their relationship. Growing up my parents got mad and had disagreements like anyone, but I never once saw them yelling at each other or mistreating each other in any way. They grumbled, they stewed, they needed time alone, but somehow 35 years later, there they are: still holding hands when they walk down the street together.
Indira Gutierrez This was so touching! ;-; Thanks for sharing; I'm wishing you and your parents the best. 💕
Well said.
So many young people today don’t have self respect, let alone respect for others.
Also, social media brings out the narcissist in people. Selfishness is the enemy of any good relationship.
Marriage takes a certain amount of selflessness
That's a beautiful thing that your parents have each other. But I think they're one of the lucky ones. I feel that what people don't understand is how people can grow for the better or for the worse. Some people don't understand that if growth is neglected then they will not understand how to either grow with each other or to grow as a person period.
Girl, that was touching. Make sure you say that at their golden anniversary *knock knock*
Indira Gutierrez
Yeah well people today are not like your parents. People nowadays are worse, especially people my age.
Just never forget about the prenup agreements.
them: i can’t believe he’s so vindictive
the lawyer: well what were they like during the marriage?
them: they were vindictive
"Your expectation is need to be communicated early" agree.. they really give good advice..
I also really love the advice about "don't expect the person to change". You gotta either be fine with the fact that your partner is an imperfect human being and love them fully despite their flaws, or decide that they are not the kind of flaws you want to intertwine into your life through a legally binding contract.
Heard it said that women marry men thinking that they'll change, while men marry women thinking they won't.
@@kontrarien5721 opposite attracted
I've never been in a relationship but ironically I'm already bracing myself for a divorce.
Awwwww! Hang in there! It's good to be preventive, but also think positively!
OMG SAME!!! 😂😂
Well you definitely need to with that attitude!
Relate too so much i think you are me
Jacob Horton no u
I’m a marriage therapist and completely agree with what they said. It’s about who the people are and what the goals are that can make something successful.
Yeah your right truly right
Great advice I've been married 13 years and we are super detailed about money and role expectations so no one gets disappointed🙂
This is solid advice that no one talks about
Should be talked about more than setting up retirement account and other bs
People don't take the time to figure out themselves first.
I'm 33 and single so I've technically avoided my first divorce.
Technically, I've avoided three divorces.
Sorry lawyers.
Lol! Well I'm 49 and single so I guess I've avoided two divorces. Lucky me!
32. No partner.
Congratulations on your achievement!
37 no marriage. Life is good
It’s a good thing that I was never got married nor had any children and now it’s been a very bliss & quiet life for me for the last 30 years. It’s always a Saturday waking morning for me and I make a coffee for myself and cook a nice breakfast over reading the newspaper.
Me watching in 2021: Just marry the person you see yourself with in an apocalypse.
Weh?
Lol, well played
Looking for a friend for the end of the world.
@@dcyphyr great headline, hope it attracts the right people.
There are two problems. The first is that the other person might not change. The other is that they might change.
DrumWild - Bingo. But there is a 3rd problem. All these seemingly rational thinking lawyers all sat on the gap in the cushion. They were being directed so likely scripted too.
The point about change, is that most people usually don’t. The person you meet on the first date is the same person 10 dates in, 10 weeks in, 10 months in and so on. You may learn new things about them as time goes on, but these things are not “new” to them, they have most likely been the way they are, long before you dated them.The way they act and behave during a divorce only comes as a shock because most people never think that the person they loved so much could be “that way” to them. The truth is, most people ignore and accept their partners flaws when things are going well, but sooner or later they start to bother them. This is not to say that the person you meet on the first date doesn’t have the capacity to change or grow, but only if they are the compromising and mature type of person. If the person you met was loud, immature, rude, demanding or whatever, why would you think they would act differently later on?
Your right about that. The challenge is to be open-minded and mature enough when you first meet to recognize what type of person you're dealing with. I was married for 20 years and was shocked by the behavior of my ex during the divorce. As you said, I ignored and accepted her behavior when we were married for the sake of getting along.. but it did bother me. During the divorce I was no longer going to accept or tolerate her bad behavior and it was a shock to see how callous and ugly she really was. I'm happy to be free of that woman.
💯
Yessssssssss
I want these people to arrange my marriage
I'm in! I'll see if the other two are available to help!
send help
Pathetic
Star Cherry They can't do that. But they might be able to organize your divorce party though. Arrange a huge cake, some Beyoncé music, some 18 year old pool boys, and discounted gift subscriptions to Boxed Wine Enthusiasts and Cat Fancy magazines.
They'll set u up for failure so you can walk in their office
2:35 good advice! Don’t look for someone to date, look for someone to marry.
Why is that good advice. Why does all love have to end in stupid marriage? If you love someone it doesn’t have to be signed into a contract. Nothing lasts forver
This should all be common sence, but regardless, should probably be shown to all teenagers, as soon as they start wanting to get into any kind of romance. Not to freak them out, but just to have them aware.
TOTALLY agree
@@cam0987 yeah😉🧡
Like firearm safety! :D
We should be given this kind of advise to a whole other things too! Degrees, Housing, Finances, etc.
Education would ruin the scam though.
I wonder how long this comment has been 666 for?
When I got engaged to my now husband I asked, “what do you expect of me as a wife” he said “oh I don’t know.”
And I was told him we needed to figure that out if we wanted to get married.
Bjs 3x a week, and make dinner a few times a week. You'll do great, good luck
@@usffan5775 lol and what does she get in return will he return the favour back.
@@smiles9599 how would I know what a woman expects of a man in a marriage? I'm divorced, maybe you should give me some pointers
@@usffan5775lol I'm not married but I guess the same back and respect. Appreciating her.
Idky this made me laugh
"Here, a gift for your wife!"
"I don't have a wife.."
"Ahh, true happiness."
The first lawyer...he is just "one love". This man REALLY understands what this job is really about...about deciding already existing problems,but never in the same time loosing your faith in life. He really knows how to enjoy the journey without minding the rain ♥️
If you can get through a divorce with respect and dignity, God bless you.
God doesnt bless divorces xd
Sergio del Río Reyes i’m so glad you have such certainty on what goes through God‘s mind.
@@MyCrimsonMischief It's literally in the bible. Unless your wife is unfaithful you can't divorce.
@@MyCrimsonMischief as Andra said it's in the Bible, as well as a million crazy things that nobody with common sense would take seriously
@@andrakarsten226 how sexist is that, How about you live your best life and stop concerning yourself with other people's misfortune.
A tip before marriage:
Make sure your internet connection is very slow and see what reaction comes out of your partner
Another good thing to do is go on a trip and watch how they act when something bad happens or something doesn’t go as planned.
Do they freak out? Become hostile and aggressive? Are they flexible and find a solution? Watching a person in a moment of crisis is the best way to see their true character
@@melocoton7 true. Anybody can be happy if life is comfortable but its only when things go south we see the true colours of people
Maybe even use this as a sign in early dating stages
Haha! I appreciate this. Especially because I'm an abnormally patient person - except when the internet is slow or the phone connection lousy 😂 But it's true that if I let someone get close enough to me to find that out, they better be warned I have only been able to remedy my frustration to a certain extent...
Yes! You learn a great deal about people when they don’t get their way a few times
Been married for nearly 12 years. Most difficult and rewarding thing I have ever done in my life.
A man I know is fond of saying “marriage is the number one cause of divorce”. He is now my father in law haha. To make things even better, I’m a minister with the authority to solemnize marriages in my province. I officiated his second wedding a few years after marrying his daughter!
when you get married they should require people to understand the legal ramifications
A cornerstone of contract law is informed consent with every single other contract let alone one as significant as this. Its not a bad idea.
When you die you should understand the legal ramifications
@@DJBremen Marriage is a scam. By explaining the scam in detail, you'd be scaring everyone away.
Call me pessimistic but I doubt it would matter. People are too blinded by romance and/or convenience for them to make the right decision.
@Blair Waldorf When I bought a house, someone sat down with me and explained everything I signed. I'd say buying a house was less impactful than getting married. Why should we explain one and not the other?
This is so overdue and the realest advice you can get. Thank you for this.
Don't believe everything you hear
This is all true been married 12 years
Half of all marriages end in divorce. The other half end in death.
Tbh, i want mine to end in divorce.
😳
And 100% of lives in general end in death, soooo...
All the people that are alive right now, will be dead in max 150 years.
@@hellothere2639 wrong i will enter stasis in 30 years and will awake in 200
I luckily live in a country where when you divorce, everything gets split 50/50 AFTER your divorce. So, if your net worth was 5 billion dollars before the divorce. You do NOT split that money. You only split the money you made after your marriage.
It’s not usually the pre marriage finance that causes a problem.. it’s the money made while married. Usually one spouse has put in more money than the other , or sacrificed carrier to raise kids and lost out financially . This is where the bitterness lies
Which country?
Luckily I live in a country where after a divorce everyone goes their way with what they personally made during marriage. No splits whatsoever, you leave with yours, the other leaves with theirs.
@@Aprilium Spit out bro, help your brothers out. Because some of plan on having families we just don't want to get f*#ked in the aftermath. We're always told "Don't do marriage" but that's so simple to say, and it assume people are ready to be single forever and never settle down.
@@Aprilium Smart country!
All this is telling me, is that chef's and musicians get divorced a lot.
Lol good point
And pilots!
Well.. musicians need some material to be sad about and sing
Lol
😂😂😂
"will you marry me?"
"oh honey, this is the happiest moment of my life! but we must take into consideration that around half of all marriages end in divorce, so let's first talk about finances. Now, about those student loans..."
And that ladies and gentlemen.. is how you don't get married!
@@Atom-Fire "talk tax cuts to me, love"
If your partner doesn't want to get married without talking about their debt, don't do it, of course.
Just marry under Islamic laws, both sides get there rights and no more
@@zerohour2703 I know right
😂 being muslim is awesome when it comes to this
Plot twist: They are purposely giving the wrong advice so they have more clients XD
I hate you
I hate you (2)
Wasn´t it obvious ;-) ....only 47% of married people who want to stay together and that does not mean that all couples of these 47% are happy, some have simply too many obligations, bought a house together, want to stay together for the kids, fear to not find another partner etc.
@@nilsfrederking62 yeah that's obvious
@@nilsfrederking62 societal pressure in countries like India
The first attorney was great. I’d enjoy listening to more of what he has to say.
The guy in the red tie trying to get more customers😂😂😂
*clients
Exactly
What makes you say that? Out of curiosity
And he’s very convincing. 😂
Lol that's the same thing I thought 🥴😂
say no more. I'm out
Jakson
I did it once, I don’t think I will do it again!! I’m good !
The main thing is to never get in 🐣
MGTOW
😂
It's like global thermal nuclear war, the best move is not to play.
I've said it before and I will say it again....people are unpredictable.
That sweet little angel may change 10 years later.
Yep that's the truth'
What stuck out to me the most in this video was the last line, "Be your spouse's cheerleader". I paid for my spouse to go to graduate school when we were engaged. I didn't have to. After all, our finances were still completely separate. But I wanted her to succeed and better herself. Not because I wanted her to get a better job when we were married, but because I wanted her to be happy doing what she would do with her life. That was a huge reassurance to myself that I was with the right person. 7 years and 3 kids later, we're stronger than ever. I know there's lots of time for me to screw this up, but I like my odds.
Why is he sitting on the crack in the couch?
Like a kitty
It’s a power move.
Marta Reitmajer lmaooo
I think its just for the camera shot
He likes the crack on his crack
I'm literally getting married in 3 days.
I've never felt so sure about anything in all my life.
Madi Murray I hope your wedding was amazing 😀
How's it going so far ?
good luck with that
good luck... u better man then me cuz I can't do it!
Pls Give us an update!💛
James Sexton is one of the most level headed, clear and concise people I have seen on TH-cam.
I'm 29 and never getting married. My last relationship would always talk about marriage but I just knew it was never going to happen. I do not want to get married.
People tell me you just haven't found the right one yet... you can't find the right one because everyone changes in time.
Wth
So men also have pressure to get married
Yep
TH-cam recommended this after watching Say Yes to the Dress.
I got this recommendation after watching Supernanny 😂
YES and paternity court
😅
Wtf same for me
I am so interested in the aftermath of those say yes to the dress weddings like how y’all doing after the i dos and credit card statement?
Marriage is the only game you can win by not playing.
Slappy I like that! lol
Noice
Yes
russian roulette is another - similar outcomes!
Yessir
Number 4 is very eye-opening and important specially in this day and age. Most people don't realise that. In fact, they outright reject it and think boyfriend/girlfriend is the best person to marry.
Here studying because I want a good solid marriage. Homework is necessary✍🏾
My advice, seek Jesus. A relationship with Jesus is vital, a man will not meet all of your expectations.
It's pointless if you can't even talk about how you're going to navigate finances, kids/animals/in-laws, religion/culture, living arrangements/lifestyle, and of course, sexpectations prior to marriage.
That’s a sign you shouldn’t be married or at least maybe dating If you can’t agree on anything really. Your better probably living separate or as friends and nothing is wrong with that it shouldnt be a agruement it’s just the truth for now until things change .
@Mia MeVery true
But then there's always deception 😑
I’m loving being married. 9 years, 4 kids. I daydream about my man sometimes. He’s the best
yeshalloween why are you watching this then?
Guadalupe Meixueiro Palacios lol
@@guadalupemeixueiropalacios3184 2 weeks and still no reply. 🤔
Just 9 years. Give it 10 to 15 more. Sometimes it takes a while.
David Pierce not everyone is miserable in marriage lol some people have great lovey long term relationships
Last line is really important. If you can find someone who talks you up and is positive about you, you won the jackpot.
This is great video. I got married last year after being together for 11 years, 8 years living together and 3 years engaged. I must admit that I am proud of myself and my husband that we spent 3 months before we got married on making sure that we look in the same direction in life like finances, children, career and so on. We trusted our photographer, DJ, venue manager etc. that everything is going to be fine on our wedding day, so I didn't quite focus much on wedding details.
Can't get divorced if you don't get married.
Modern problems, require modern solutions.
Women will find a way.
And for that reason...I’m out. This has been shark tank
Common law marraige?
@Necuno Its not the easy
Show idea:these Divorce lawyers do a Match making show👏🏻👏🏻
They would lose their jobs
I`d watch that. Could be interesting!
My dad is on his second marriage and my mom is on her third. My grandparents are also divorced.
I don't think I'll ever get married but my current boyfriend if 6 years and are living are own lives while supporting each other and I'm happy to continue doing that as long as we both want to.
The only thing we want involves healthcare and being able to make decisions for each other if the other is unable to.
I think you should add one more "don't pretend to be a different person than you really are; and notice if that person is really who they say they are or they're just trying to make you like them" There's a lot of people pretending to be someone else just to be with the person they want, and that's not going to last forever. If you say you want kids and you don't, don't lie, if you say you love animals and in reality you couldn't care less, don't lie (that sort of things). You're going to be miserable and you're going to make the other person miserable as well. I'm a divorce lawyer too.