That was the best thing. Communication and honesty is real. I was in a relationship and I felt like there was a time when it was great for a long time but that he stopped being that person and wasn't giving me what I needed. I told him how I felt and that if we don't work on it I'm worried another man will start supplying that and we either break up or the next thing is it becomes emotional cheating and I don't want to be a cheater. He was happy I brought that to him and we tried working through it and he eventually realized he didn't want to be what I had and originally signed up for and I told him it's what I need and I will accept if it's not him anymore and we were sad but went our separate ways. We were both happy for that because we could reflect and see where we were and if we were still in the same place or not.
People always wonder how marriage works out and communication and honesty is key. It's still a good thing to do even if it ends so you both can try to figure out what's going on and if it can be fixed or even if you want to because not everyone wants to fix or work on a marriage anymore. I loved Tamara on this
I agree, Surprising to see that. Then they wonder why their relationships don't work. If you're in a relationship with someone & you can't be honest with them, not your best friend, etc. Why bother.
Kinda can't believe the audience acted that way when Tam said what she said about having to be honest to save your marriage. I can see why the divorce rate is higher than ever now. Such a shame...
The divorce rate is higher than ever because women are encouraged to leave now a days instead of staying in loveless or abusive marriages. It has nothing to do with how good or bad we are at relationships. There are too many factors that play into statistics to just throw them out randomly.
Tamera is so correct and that’s why she has a healthy marriage. These people who wanna lie and are emotionally immature are the reason divorce rates are so high
Yep emotional cheating is just as damaging as a physical affair. Even more because you’re emotionally involved with someone other than your significant other.
Honestly, I don't think it's about One form of cheating being worse than the other. The truth of the matter is that they're all damaging in different ways and have different outcomes depending on how each person views it. Nevetheless all forms of cheating break trust and form barriers between a couple and we should look more at the root causes instead of thinking one form is worse than other creating levels that all lead to the same road to heartbreaks and feelings of betrayal
Chloe Hogan Bringing a child into it definitely would hurt a lot & be a constant reminder of the cheating. But it can sometimes work out, if it was just sex for him & he wasn’t emotionally attached to the other woman. If he was truly sorry, & didn’t want to lose you, then maybe he could make it up to you. But you would have to understand & accept the financial & parental responsibilities that he would have from there on out. Most likely, the child will live in your home, at least part time. Your man will still have communication with the mother of that child until the child goes to college. That’s a lot to accept, but it can be done. The relationship dynamic totally changes tho. Lack of trust, resentment about time & expenses directed toward the child, can creep in. Old wounds keep getting re-opened & it can take a toll on the couple. These same dynamics play out when the woman cheats, but I think it’s much harder for the man to see another man’s child in his home everyday. Most men are not willing to accept it, but in some rare cases they do. It depends on how much they love the woman & what part they played in their relationship, before she cheated. If he was a jerk he might accept that he pushed her to seek comfort somewhere else. If he was a great husband he might not be as willing to forgive her. It’s definitely a hard thing to go thru for all involved.
@@cloclo3740 being starved emotionally and your mate falling in love with someone else is terrible. They will give all their energy to them and feel like sex with their mate is cheating .People have emotionless sex all the time , sometimes it results in a kid.
It was an affair, she was messaging another man while her husband slept in bed next to her. Keep in mind the man she was messaging was also married at the time, there was nothing innocent about what Johnny and Jessica were doing. Jessica could have been honest with Nick about the fact she was struggling being married to him, it was completely disrespectful to Nick and to Johnny's wife to be doing this behind their backs. I agreed with Tamera 100% and I am proud of her for not backing down, this newfound confidence in Tamera is so refreshing to watch! Speak more Tam!!!
I know tam gets a lot of flack but she is truly a pure heart and I love that about her. She says and does what she feels morally right and faces the hate because she has peace in her soul. Love her!!
Maritza & the VanCuties because some people say she’s to nice and fake, others don’t like that’s she’s married to a white man, other’s say she’s out of touch with reality honestly she’s perfect example on how you could be the nicest most pure hearted person in the world and someone won’t like you.
Its not always that simple. Were still human and we fall weak. I think the most important thing is be honest with urself and partner about what is going on before it goes too far, like as in a physical affair.
Valerie Williams yeah, agreed. We have to find ways renew & remain ingrained in our love for our significant others... complacency/lack of communication breeds room for invisible walls we put up that can lead to destruction...
That’s it right there. What’s sad is I’ve heard people say and believe that cheating is just a normal part of a relationship and subsequently settle for such unnecessary behavior. People don’t know how to communicate or have self respect for themselves.
🗣🗣🗣Emotional Affairs are when you’re confiding in someone other than your spouse!! Lunch dates Texting Sharing secrets Talking about intimate personal matters Are all grounds that lead to an emotional affair.
I have been there. My husband was out of work and VERY depressed and detached. I was working LOTS of overtime to support our family and a Male co worker was always willing to listen and help.
@@mochamommyATX This is very real. It can be very hard in life to support each other when the rest of your lives are falling apart. He wasn't capable in those times of doing the work he needed to do to support you when the full financial weight was on you, but with that financial weight you weren't able to give him the support he needed, either. I think so many see cheating as some black and white thing, and the fact is that its about a fracture in the relationship, and that is rarely one-sided. Its so easy for everyone to get in their feelings, him feeling neglected, you feeling neglected...
The thing I love most in this segment is how #LoniLove is taking the role of mediator. This is a needed step to minimize talking over each other. #TheRealDaytime
Jeannie had it right, it starts before the love/ in love component, it starts when you start opening up to another person in a way that you're not with your significant other.
This is actually crazy that so many people wouldn’t tell their partner that they were cheating. I’m sure if their partner was cheating on them they would want to know. How can you truly fix a problem if you don’t know the whole story?
I can’t understand why the ladies in the audience are saying No to her comment?? Like why wouldn’t you wanna be honest? You want all these men to be honest to you- but when it’s you sneaking around, then no?? Crazy man.
It’s not stopping the emotions it choosing not to rely on them and have boundaries because you know you will enjoy their company in a way you wouldn’t want your spouse or partner to enjoy
Totally agree with Tamera and Jeannie. It’s called growth, maturity and open communication which strengthens trust. Why put yourself in a position for someone else to come in and tell your spouse about you? I would rather tell my spouse about me and my mistakes or poor choices and just deal with the consequences head on and keep that moment of defeat and resolution between just the two of us before any outsider can come in and do any further damage. Real marriage is based off of communication which in turn can strengthen and/or build trust. If we can’t share our f* ups and feelings of doubt, weakness and temptation with each other than is it really real? I would rather live alone than in a union of secrecy and/or deception.
Drops 4x13 yall to quit being judgmental smh. just because she has a different opinion don’t mean that she’s doing it maybe she just thinks what’s the point. Or maybe she has a different idea of dealing with it.
🗣🗣🗣Emotional Affairs are more destructive then physical affairs because emotional affairs are created by building BONDS and a deeper connection!! People can have sex and walk away BUT people can’t walk away from attachments that easily!! Emotional Affairs are Attachments!!!
Yeah what Jessica did with Johnny wasn't right, but she probably didn't feel obligated to be respectful to him since Nick was treating her badly too. They're both at fault
In her book she says emotional affair and she too agrees that it worse....don't use her honesty against her. No one ever wants to talk about what skeletons they've kept away hidden in their closets but are usually quick to state their strong opinions and judgements!
@@serendipity0628 I am not judging her I'm saying her action were cheating. In my opinion. Also in my opinion that is worse than a physical affair. Not just for this situation for any.
It's not fair to judge people. No cheating is not good by any means. Especially when the other person is not a bad person. My ex husband was putting me through hell and I started to have feelings for a male coworker. He was everything that I didn't have in my partner. I was miserable. When I was at work. I was so happy to be at work. It was my escape. We would talk about the issues we were having with our spouses. He even started crying when talking about his problems. It started as a friendship and then we became very close and it felt right. It felt like a missing piece was found. I had warn my ex husband many times that I would leave him. Even his best friend told him that if he doesn't treat me right that I would find happiness somewhere else. Some people are not meant for each other. And people think the worst of people that find happiness somewhere else. They always side with the person who didn't stray not knowing that person is an abuser and making their partner's life a living hell.
To answer the question, To end an emotional affair, you must cut the person you're having it with off. Because no matter what, those feelings are underlying and even though you may not act on it, it is not right to let romantic feelings grow when you are a married woman. Eventually, the shoulder to cry on, may become a dick to ride on. And it may not even be your intention, but it all starts, with a thought.
John Doe I think women are really more afraid to open up because men majority of the time men don’t stay when a women makes a mistake. Everything changes. They are probably afraid of being left . But Tam is right you gotta be honest and communicate.
Aria D I can definitely see what you’re saying. There’s no perfect answer. That’s why when this stuff starts it’s almost always the beginning of the end. But I appreciate you being real about it.
CreativelyKia Anybody who knows anything about women knows that’s not true. Women definitely cheat more. But I don’t think it’s cause they are worse or anything. I think how much people cheat depends on how many people are approaching them on a regular. So it’s easier for women to get caught up because no matter what they look like there’s a million thirsty dudes hitting on her every day and making her feel desired. Below average dudes like to say they would never cheat but it’s just cause no one is throwing it at them.
John Doe I can’t speak for all women but in my lifetime, I’ve seen men cheat WAY more often. And the two friends I knew that had multiple guys was solely because the guy they loved didn’t want to commit. Another way to put it is: it’s MUCH harder to find a man that has never cheated than a woman that has never cheated
I used to be upset that no one ever let Loni speak, but now I’m starting to notice that Loni is fine being the referee in the middle without having to say much at all because either way she is still getting hella paid! Lol yay Loni
Very true. She's said before (I think on Twitter or some other media outlet) that her position is the moderator. People take it as her not participating but she's doing her job. She's listening, refereeing as you said, making sure the ladies stay on topic, and anchors the conversations in facts.
Yes, I feel like Loni is seen as a big sister or a big cousin to the other women, so she has to take the reigns and keep the conversation on track and cohesive.
Amanda is excellent speaker on heavy issues like politics, race or injustice and no one can deny that, however most of the times she's very off on a simple, light or everyday issues like this. I think she fits better on the view!
I completely agree! The other 4 girls are better at dealing with each other. Plus I would loveeeee Amanda to be at the same table as Meghan McCain! Now that would be a good show! This show doesn't need her to go up against anyone, so it's weird when she gets soo defensive. But Meghan McCain needs a dose of Amanda for sure!
Thank god Nick is now happily married with Vanessa and they have 3 beautiful kids. ❤ An emotional affair is just as bad as physical.. But in my opinion, WORSE. I was a huge fan of Nick & Jess and was heart broken when they got divorced. For the longest I didn't want to accept Vanessa until I realized she was actually the better fit for Nick. She's beautiful inside and out. After Nick, Jessica was in and out of relationships with different people.. She was a mess for a while. I'm glad Jessica is speaking about this because I thought Nick was the cheater.
Her having an emotional affair doesn't mean Nick didn't cheat. He could very have been cheating and that could have lead to her emotional affair. We don't know
I’m surprised Tamera was so quick reminded how many years she been married today. Because any other time she act like she didn’t realize that it’s been 9yrs just for the applauses lol
1:20 = mood! “Girl stop!” I didn’t realize she meant she was actually acting on those emotions... that is out of control! She was one “I love you” away from a physical affair. Either way, this sounds just as bad.
“I’m mixing up my white boys!” Now if a white woman said that about black men it would be a problem. Insert double standard. I agree with Tam- it’s hard, but being honest at the start of an emotional affair will help protect your marriage.
Because it is a problem to say black boys when you are talking about black men. Put some respect on it! Happy Black History Month!!🧘🏿♂️🧘🏿♂️🕺🏿💃🏿🙋🏿♂️🙋🏿♀️
"I'm mixing up my white boys". Imagine if someone said, "I'm mixing up my black boys", that would be a topic on this show and Loni would have a whole lot to say about it.
Alec B THIS IS NOOOOT THE FIRST TIME either! How are you gonna talk about black people & how you want them to be at least respected when you can’t even go about your conversation without being disrespectful to another race. It’s stupid But of course she’s old & wise 🤦🏻♀️ she can say whatever she wants cause it’s so damn funny
I love the whole “imagine if roles were reversed” question when it has been reversed, for years. And nobody gives a damn when it happens to black people so keep that same energy 🙃
I think if you're in an emotional affair and want to be honest, its a bad idea to tell your partner you like someone else. It's much better if you tell them you're losing interest in them, just confront your partner on what's happening between the two of you before you tell them you're cheating on them.
It’s not necessarily that you’re losing interest, it’s more so the relationship is lacking something probably intimacy outside of the physical. You’re right on word choice tho.
I absolutely LOVE Tamara. One of the problems with society is we compromise on what's right and lean toward what's comfortable. The goals in marriage should be longevity and effective communication, we can't get there by keeping secrets.
Thanks Jeanie for being the first one to explain what an emotional affair is in a way that makes sense to me. I honestly never understood the meaning behind the term until now.
Cheating is never ok no matter what, however having seen newlyweds I can see what she was lacking in her marriage Nick was hateful to her and distant from her and treated her like a child. I'm not saying he's a bad guy necessarily I just dont think they were right for eachother.
Dead on! I was married to my ex husband and thought things were normal and ok until I started to feel a connection to someone at work. First thing I did was speak up to my husband and said “what am I suppose to do with this? How do I react to this and how am I suppose to feel about this? Something is off and we need to figure this out!” And all he did was shut down and put absolutely no effort in. Needless to say our marriage ended shorty after. I didn’t plan or look for that emotional connection but it happened and I tried to initiate working through it. My ex just wasn’t comfortable or willing to fight through whatever was wrong with us. Because if that I knew and decided that I couldn’t go in with him if that was his choice.
Even though I’ve never liked Jessica’s style of music, I’ve always been drawn to her! I ordered her book and I can’t wait to read it. I hope she’s doing well 💜
I agree with Tamera, I've been in dry spells with my SO when we were going through tough times. The emotional intimacy wasn't there. Funny thing is even if you're not looking for it outside your relationship, it can find you. I never let it happen, but when the thought or desire came to, I was quick to tell my SO my thoughts and feelings. We had to talk about it to get back on track. It does take honesty, self awareness, respect for yourself, and respect for your partner to address those issues.
Yesss be honest or it will haunt your relationship and probably come back to bite you. The “truth” is always looking for a way to be seen or heard. It will find a way...can’t hide it.
This is so true, i havent actually done it but i have been in a point in my relationship where I felt so alone and just wanted attention from someone, i wanted to feel loved and appreciated. So INSTEAD of going to someone else, I told my man straight up “ hey something isn’t right, i’m not getting what i need from you my mind is honestly starting to wonder from our relationship, we really need to fix this” and we fixed it! We’re almost 6 years in, & have two beautiful children AND are getting married this year. It’s so important to be upfront with your partner.
It's sad when your partner stops being honest. There are always going to be people in the world looking to breakup relationships. Those people find some sort of crack in any relationship that they can exploit. Then use that knowledge as a wedge in the couple's relationship till eventually everything falls apart.
I think something we as people in relationships don’t realize is that the type of affair you first end up in won’t end up being the same once you’re trying to get out of it... so for men they may physically cheat and might end up having emotions based off of the fact that the SEX IS SOOOO GOOD... he’s all confused thinking the sex means they are meant for each other when in reality the sex is just that... sex... whereas a woman may end up in a emotional affair BUT by the time she’s been with that man enough she actually ends wanting to give up the goods to him because he treats her so good... why not treat him with something special... neither one is right but sometime things do happen and we as humans do have hormones and things... so I suggest the safest and most logical route would be to be honest as soon as you start having a wandering eye
Those ladies in the audience looked crazy. As if they were promoting emotional cheating. Now imagine if their boyfriends/husbands did this, they would want the truth. But I guess everyone wants to be on camera for something.
This was done to me by my partner of 7 years. It hurt like hell and we never could bounce back. It truly is the worst type of cheating or affair! And always someone close or af work...my man was talking to a girl from work so you never know.
Tamer got married in a good age,she was mature,Jessica was too young to be in a marriage when she was with nick...ev1 makes mistakes,u just hv to learn from it 🙏🏽
Plus Nick was mean to her, I feel like he treated her like she was stupid, so she got attached to somebody who treated her like the queen she is. Unfortunately that person was married too, and idk what was missing in his life why he was having an emotional affair with her. I'm not defending them, but I'm not judging them either. None of us are perfect
Affairs of the heart is way worse than physical contact and she also admitted the song let him fly she did was about johnny Knoxville not nick. So that's more omg moment she did cheat on nick. Sending love letters to Johnny and flirting with him on set and she was scared that nick came to set in baton rouge when she was filming. She def cheated. Nobody's perfect.
I like that you called it an "affair of the heart". That's a better description. I've been cheated on by an ex. It hurts. But to me when you connect on an emotional level it may hit differently. But it's the same thing. She didn't cheat sexually. But her heart and emotions were with someone other than her husband. But she's owning up to it.
Whether or not it qualifies is between Jessica and Nick. Every couple decides for themselves where the boundaries are. That said, I think a clear sign when you know you've crossed a boundary is when you take steps to hide it from your partner. That's when you know.
Omg I was wondering about when she cried performing that song. She seemed so over Nick that I was confused as to why she was so emotional over him. So it was about Johnny???
Tamera, thank you!! I have been telling my clients this all the time thank god i catch them when they are single most of the time! Congratulations on your nine years :)
I honestly thank the ladies of The Real because I learned how to communicate in relationships and in life from this show, their TH-cam Channels & Podcasts. Honesty is always the best policy and it’s not what you say it’s how you say it. 💗
I'm sorry emotional cheating is not this. It is when you one sidely emotionally commit yourself to someone else while being in a relationship and that person flirting back. But what they were doing was an AFFAIR POINT BLANK PERIOD!!! Just cause you don't kiss or have sex does not mean that you aren't cheating. What she did was cheating she just wanted to feel less bad so she called it and emotional affair. But if you are telling someone else that you love them that is cheating God forbid I'd rather find out my partner kissed someone else than said I love you to someone else. That is just disgusting and shameful and she is using it to make money and probably reopen wounds in her ex-husband who is HAPPILY MARRIED WITH CHILDREN THANK GOD!!!
Ade's little song was too funny! Tam, Jeannie, and Ade were 100% correct especially Tam. You have to be honest and communicate with your partner about what you are feeling. You won't fix your marriage if you don't hit the issue at the root rather than avoiding it all together.
I know I’m in the smaller percentage but I am hurt more by an emotional affair than a physical one. I’m not devastated by his greed that led to a grind. Im threatened by him sharing with someone else his heart and mind.
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Tamera is 100% CORRECT, to move forward you have to be honest with your partner, talk and work through your issues and ask for forgiveness.
That was the best thing. Communication and honesty is real. I was in a relationship and I felt like there was a time when it was great for a long time but that he stopped being that person and wasn't giving me what I needed. I told him how I felt and that if we don't work on it I'm worried another man will start supplying that and we either break up or the next thing is it becomes emotional cheating and I don't want to be a cheater. He was happy I brought that to him and we tried working through it and he eventually realized he didn't want to be what I had and originally signed up for and I told him it's what I need and I will accept if it's not him anymore and we were sad but went our separate ways. We were both happy for that because we could reflect and see where we were and if we were still in the same place or not.
He wouldn’t tell you, I say just break things off with the person your talking to
Indeed, the issue one of the issue is people lacking in integrity. Smh
Exactly! A lot of those audience members need to grow up smh
Yes I believe in this. I've been married for 10 years and I find honestly in all areas prevents these things from happening.
Not everyone is on the level that Tam is on when it comes to communication with a partner... and it shows!
Yep people looking at a healthY marriage and can’t understand what a role honesty and communication plays in it.
People always wonder how marriage works out and communication and honesty is key. It's still a good thing to do even if it ends so you both can try to figure out what's going on and if it can be fixed or even if you want to because not everyone wants to fix or work on a marriage anymore. I loved Tamara on this
She had lots of marriage therapy.
I agree, Surprising to see that. Then they wonder why their relationships don't work. If you're in a relationship with someone & you can't be honest with them, not your best friend, etc. Why bother.
Facts people are encouraging lying and its sickening
“If you wanna fix your marriage, you gotta be honest about it.” - Tamera. THAT RIGHT THERE.
Shes a exquisite women. True Beauty! From the inside out.
Exactly
This is why mine failed she’s absolutely correct
@@GraceLove33 that’s very mature for you to admit that.
She’s the bomb.
Kinda can't believe the audience acted that way when Tam said what she said about having to be honest to save your marriage. I can see why the divorce rate is higher than ever now. Such a shame...
Brittany Mercedes yup, it’s because most people are terrible at relationships.
And that's sad. If you can't be honest then what's the point of being in a relationship? People are just dumb
Brittany Mercedes exactly, like what the heck is going on in society
I feel like seeing two ways in this situation: fix the marriage or husband take evidence and divorce the woman.
The divorce rate is higher than ever because women are encouraged to leave now a days instead of staying in loveless or abusive marriages. It has nothing to do with how good or bad we are at relationships. There are too many factors that play into statistics to just throw them out randomly.
That lady who was like NOPE to Tamera is probably having an affair.
That's what I'm thinking😂
Either that or she’s done it before, but she’s guilty af 😂
Right 😂
YEPPPPPP. She was bold and loud too 😂😂😂
😂 exactly
Tamera is so correct and that’s why she has a healthy marriage. These people who wanna lie and are emotionally immature are the reason divorce rates are so high
Cheating. That's it. Cheating is cheating is cheating. Period.
Dez L. You can’t help who you have feelings for but you can help not having sex. So how is that cheating?
K L it’s still cheating
K L re read the comment.
Absolutely
Dez L. Especially in a marriage
Yep emotional cheating is just as damaging as a physical affair. Even more because you’re emotionally involved with someone other than your significant other.
👏
End of story. 🙌🏾
Honestly, I don't think it's about One form of cheating being worse than the other. The truth of the matter is that they're all damaging in different ways and have different outcomes depending on how each person views it. Nevetheless all forms of cheating break trust and form barriers between a couple and we should look more at the root causes instead of thinking one form is worse than other creating levels that all lead to the same road to heartbreaks and feelings of betrayal
Emotional affairs are the worst kinds of cheating.
I would think a sexual affair that produced a child would be the worst.
Chloe Hogan Bringing a child into it definitely would hurt a lot & be a constant reminder of the cheating. But it can sometimes work out, if it was just sex for him & he wasn’t emotionally attached to the other woman. If he was truly sorry, & didn’t want to lose you, then maybe he could make it up to you. But you would have to understand & accept the financial & parental responsibilities that he would have from there on out.
Most likely, the child will live in your home, at least part time. Your man will still have communication with the mother of that child until the child goes to college. That’s a lot to accept, but it can be done. The relationship dynamic totally changes tho.
Lack of trust, resentment about time & expenses directed toward the child, can creep in. Old wounds keep getting re-opened & it can take a toll on the couple. These same dynamics play out when the woman cheats, but I think it’s much harder for the man to see another man’s child in his home everyday. Most men are not willing to accept it, but in some rare cases they do. It depends on how much they love the woman & what part they played in their relationship, before she cheated. If he was a jerk he might accept that he pushed her to seek comfort somewhere else. If he was a great husband he might not be as willing to forgive her. It’s definitely a hard thing to go thru for all involved.
@@cloclo3740 being starved emotionally and your mate falling in love with someone else is terrible. They will give all their energy to them and feel like sex with their mate is cheating .People have emotionless sex all the time , sometimes it results in a kid.
Genese Knox I agree! That pain takes longer to heal.
@@denisemughrabi8171 if he really loved you , no excuse for cheating
It was an affair, she was messaging another man while her husband slept in bed next to her. Keep in mind the man she was messaging was also married at the time, there was nothing innocent about what Johnny and Jessica were doing. Jessica could have been honest with Nick about the fact she was struggling being married to him, it was completely disrespectful to Nick and to Johnny's wife to be doing this behind their backs. I agreed with Tamera 100% and I am proud of her for not backing down, this newfound confidence in Tamera is so refreshing to watch! Speak more Tam!!!
@You Tried It! Everyone has moved on and happily married to someone else which is the positive that came out of this.
@@mandys1038 texting another man with your man sleeping next to you is highly disrespectful.
Mandy S I mean given their past, do you think they are happily married now or are you jst assuming?
I've noticed too and agree.
Pretty much sexting...
I know tam gets a lot of flack but she is truly a pure heart and I love that about her. She says and does what she feels morally right and faces the hate because she has peace in her soul. Love her!!
ShannanDGS why does she get a lot of flack? I didn’t know that
Maritza & the VanCuties because some people say she’s to nice and fake, others don’t like that’s she’s married to a white man, other’s say she’s out of touch with reality honestly she’s perfect example on how you could be the nicest most pure hearted person in the world and someone won’t like you.
It is very admirable.
Well said!!!
“She makes really good shoes , maybe she walked out of it “ 😂😂
Amanda's comment got me hollering 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Amanda ain’t lying though. Jessica Simpson’s shoe line is pretty legit. 👌
😂😂😂
Bars
Amanda crazy 😂😂😂😂😂
When you whole heartedly love your spouse, then there is no room for anyone to come in anyway emotional or physical. Your heart is taken.
Yup, they can try but it ain’t happenin’😎
Its not always that simple. Were still human and we fall weak. I think the most important thing is be honest with urself and partner about what is going on before it goes too far, like as in a physical affair.
Well maybe her and nick was falling off
Valerie Williams yeah, agreed. We have to find ways renew & remain ingrained in our love for our significant others... complacency/lack of communication breeds room for invisible walls we put up that can lead to destruction...
That’s it right there. What’s sad is I’ve heard people say and believe that cheating is just a normal part of a relationship and subsequently settle for such unnecessary behavior. People don’t know how to communicate or have self respect for themselves.
“I wanna do some NaStY thingsss” LOLOL I love Adrienne
Linda Nguyen 💀
😂😂😂😂
I was thinking the same thing!!!😂😂😂
I had to rewind to watch her say it again😂
That took me out!
🗣🗣🗣Emotional Affairs are when you’re confiding in someone other than your spouse!!
Lunch dates
Texting
Sharing secrets
Talking about intimate personal matters
Are all grounds that lead to an emotional affair.
I have been there. My husband was out of work and VERY depressed and detached. I was working LOTS of overtime to support our family and a Male co worker was always willing to listen and help.
I had to cut it off and switch shifts to avoid him. The hugs and a kiss on the cheek...Went to HR that day!
CD M
That’s how it starts. People confide in one another and next thing you know the friendship turns into something more.
@@mochamommyATX This is very real. It can be very hard in life to support each other when the rest of your lives are falling apart. He wasn't capable in those times of doing the work he needed to do to support you when the full financial weight was on you, but with that financial weight you weren't able to give him the support he needed, either. I think so many see cheating as some black and white thing, and the fact is that its about a fracture in the relationship, and that is rarely one-sided. Its so easy for everyone to get in their feelings, him feeling neglected, you feeling neglected...
Lady Beldaran wow you hit the nail on the head
Why is loni giving me sadness vibes from the movie “ inside out” 🤣
Aalesha Freeman 🤣🤣🤣😩😩
Omg 😂😂
Aalesha Freeman lmfaoooo 💀😂
Mannn 😂😂😂😂😂
Lmaoo 😂😂😂
The thing I love most in this segment is how #LoniLove is taking the role of mediator. This is a needed step to minimize talking over each other. #TheRealDaytime
You’re definitely right about that. But honestly it doesn’t seem to happen that often, at least not as frequently as it does on The View.
They need to go back to 4 people. The 5 too often just turns into a circus
Rice Waster Aleks there was always 5 hosts when the show started though 🤷🏾♀️
@@beverlynoelle6941 it worked with tamar but theres just no synergy with the new chick
@@atomknight8361 Her name is Amanda Seales.
Jeannie had it right, it starts before the love/ in love component, it starts when you start opening up to another person in a way that you're not with your significant other.
This is actually crazy that so many people wouldn’t tell their partner that they were cheating. I’m sure if their partner was cheating on them they would want to know. How can you truly fix a problem if you don’t know the whole story?
I can’t understand why the ladies in the audience are saying No to her comment?? Like why wouldn’t you wanna be honest? You want all these men to be honest to you- but when it’s you sneaking around, then no?? Crazy man.
Because those women are probably the type to cheat or become the homewreckers lol.
💯💯💯
That girl in the audience date thugs 😂 she knows you can’t say “babe I been talking to someone” 😂🤦🏻♀️
MJ Parker 🤣🤣🤦🏾♀️
Don't have to a thug can be a silent crazy dude that will snap if you tell him.Which may cause your life
You so right ! 😂
🤣🤣🤣🤣😂
Watch out for signs of a short temper ladies!!!!! Red flags start about small things.
Cheating is cheating. Periodtt. No words to define CHEATING! So, stop 🛑! End of discussion! Next!!!!
What are the two tt stand for just curious.
iMolika Men-Thlang how can u stop having feelings for someone? It’s out of your control. Having sex is cheating
It’s not stopping the emotions it choosing not to rely on them and have boundaries because you know you will enjoy their company in a way you wouldn’t want your spouse or partner to enjoy
Ok so you want her to be with a man that verbally emotionally abusive to her great. Grow up lady you need it
The White RickJames 😁😉
Totally agree with Tamera and Jeannie. It’s called growth, maturity and open communication which strengthens trust. Why put yourself in a position for someone else to come in and tell your spouse about you? I would rather tell my spouse about me and my mistakes or poor choices and just deal with the consequences head on and keep that moment of defeat and resolution between just the two of us before any outsider can come in and do any further damage. Real marriage is based off of communication which in turn can strengthen and/or build trust. If we can’t share our f* ups and feelings of doubt, weakness and temptation with each other than is it really real? I would rather live alone than in a union of secrecy and/or deception.
“When you own your flaws, no one can use them against you”
👏🏾👏🏾 YASS Adrienne and Tam, educate the singles! Honesty is always the best policy if you want to make it work. And Jeanie too, she's a seasoned vet.
4:16
The look of concern on Tam’s face had me DEAD!! 🤣🤣
That wasn't a look of concern. It was 'who's that disagreeing while I'm spitting facts up in here' look
Arely Carmona screaminggg 😂
The lady at 4:19 was not in on it. She was like "Oh no, I don't think so".
Augustina Mensah She’s probably the type that does this. Its funny because she pretty much made her self look dumb by just her facial expressions.
Yeah, she was like "Nope. Not gonna tell my husband ANYTHING unless he catches me!"
She's the type to be in a non fulfilling relationship and have emotional relationships to fill the gaps in her actual love life
I agree with the lady. You think a man would come home talking about an emotional affair with another woman????Hell no
Drops 4x13 yall to quit being judgmental smh. just because she has a different opinion don’t mean that she’s doing it maybe she just thinks what’s the point. Or maybe she has a different idea of dealing with it.
🗣🗣🗣Emotional Affairs are more destructive then physical affairs because emotional affairs are created by building BONDS and a deeper connection!!
People can have sex and walk away BUT people can’t walk away from attachments that easily!!
Emotional Affairs are Attachments!!!
what do u do when u have one
sophieee
You cut it off
False.
Ms. Beautiful absolute FACTS! 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
@You Tried It! Exactly and you get that how?
It always seemed like Nick treated Jessica with disdain and disrespect.
She was annoying at times lol
He did! He was a narcissist and didn’t like that she was more famous than him
Like she said, they were both a fault
He probably treated her like a slave
Yeah what Jessica did with Johnny wasn't right, but she probably didn't feel obligated to be respectful to him since Nick was treating her badly too. They're both at fault
That last part that Jeannie said the best fix it before it’s too late
Emotional affairs are just as bad as a physical affairs. She cheated point blank period.
Stephanie Looney 🙄🙄🙄
I think emotional is even worse
In her book she says emotional affair and she too agrees that it worse....don't use her honesty against her. No one ever wants to talk about what skeletons they've kept away hidden in their closets but are usually quick to state their strong opinions and judgements!
@@serendipity0628 I am not judging her I'm saying her action were cheating. In my opinion. Also in my opinion that is worse than a physical affair. Not just for this situation for any.
It's not fair to judge people. No cheating is not good by any means. Especially when the other person is not a bad person. My ex husband was putting me through hell and I started to have feelings for a male coworker. He was everything that I didn't have in my partner. I was miserable. When I was at work. I was so happy to be at work. It was my escape. We would talk about the issues we were having with our spouses. He even started crying when talking about his problems. It started as a friendship and then we became very close and it felt right. It felt like a missing piece was found. I had warn my ex husband many times that I would leave him. Even his best friend told him that if he doesn't treat me right that I would find happiness somewhere else. Some people are not meant for each other. And people think the worst of people that find happiness somewhere else. They always side with the person who didn't stray not knowing that person is an abuser and making their partner's life a living hell.
To answer the question,
To end an emotional affair, you must cut the person you're having it with off. Because no matter what, those feelings are underlying and even though you may not act on it, it is not right to let romantic feelings grow when you are a married woman.
Eventually, the shoulder to cry on, may become a dick to ride on. And it may not even be your intention, but it all starts, with a thought.
That rhyme sent me 😂
😂Yep
Jazmine Jules 😂😂
😫😩🤣😂
😂😂🤣🤣😂
That audience reaction to Tamara is why men shouldn’t be called insecure when they don’t trust their girl
John Doe I think women are really more afraid to open up because men majority of the time men don’t stay when a women makes a mistake. Everything changes. They are probably afraid of being left . But Tam is right you gotta be honest and communicate.
John Doe LOL that’s ironic because it’s mostly men that cheat
Aria D I can definitely see what you’re saying. There’s no perfect answer. That’s why when this stuff starts it’s almost always the beginning of the end. But I appreciate you being real about it.
CreativelyKia Anybody who knows anything about women knows that’s not true. Women definitely cheat more. But I don’t think it’s cause they are worse or anything. I think how much people cheat depends on how many people are approaching them on a regular. So it’s easier for women to get caught up because no matter what they look like there’s a million thirsty dudes hitting on her every day and making her feel desired. Below average dudes like to say they would never cheat but it’s just cause no one is throwing it at them.
John Doe I can’t speak for all women but in my lifetime, I’ve seen men cheat WAY more often. And the two friends I knew that had multiple guys was solely because the guy they loved didn’t want to commit. Another way to put it is: it’s MUCH harder to find a man that has never cheated than a woman that has never cheated
You guys need to stop letting Loni read people’s names! Loool
Lmao I want her to keep reading people’s names
Rach H hahah it’s true
LOL in her defense the other women have screwed up too.
I think she did that on purpose trying to be funny
I used to be upset that no one ever let Loni speak, but now I’m starting to notice that Loni is fine being the referee in the middle without having to say much at all because either way she is still getting hella paid! Lol yay Loni
Very true. She's said before (I think on Twitter or some other media outlet) that her position is the moderator. People take it as her not participating but she's doing her job. She's listening, refereeing as you said, making sure the ladies stay on topic, and anchors the conversations in facts.
There was a moment when all of the hosts were talking at the same time (around 4:10), and Loni stepped in and smoothed it out.
Yes, I feel like Loni is seen as a big sister or a big cousin to the other women, so she has to take the reigns and keep the conversation on track and cohesive.
@@seriousone8030 good eye, I didn't notice
Damn that woman shaking her head at 4:18, the person dating her better be careful 👀😬
She's probably trending already lol
I agree with Tamera. Mature, healthy, long-lasting relationships require honesty. Lots of it.
I've been watching 4:17 on repeat because Tamera's expression has me weak lol
OMG SAME!
I need it to become a meme! This is perfect!
It's meme material
Amanda is excellent speaker on heavy issues like politics, race or injustice and no one can deny that, however most of the times she's very off on a simple, light or everyday issues like this. I think she fits better on the view!
thonyvides Good point
Said The Same thing. But She is too Young for Whoopi and the ladies.
thonyvides she fit perfectly in here. You complain too much.
Cuz she doesn't have relationship experience lol
She could always fake it like Loni
I completely agree! The other 4 girls are better at dealing with each other. Plus I would loveeeee Amanda to be at the same table as Meghan McCain! Now that would be a good show! This show doesn't need her to go up against anyone, so it's weird when she gets soo defensive. But Meghan McCain needs a dose of Amanda for sure!
Thank god Nick is now happily married with Vanessa and they have 3 beautiful kids. ❤ An emotional affair is just as bad as physical.. But in my opinion, WORSE. I was a huge fan of Nick & Jess and was heart broken when they got divorced. For the longest I didn't want to accept Vanessa until I realized she was actually the better fit for Nick. She's beautiful inside and out. After Nick, Jessica was in and out of relationships with different people.. She was a mess for a while. I'm glad Jessica is speaking about this because I thought Nick was the cheater.
me too
women cheat more than men
Her having an emotional affair doesn't mean Nick didn't cheat. He could very have been cheating and that could have lead to her emotional affair. We don't know
@@ofletcher6422 Oh well. They didn't work out for a reason. They both seem happy now and that's all that matters.🤷
He cheated as well
I’m surprised Tamera was so quick reminded how many years she been married today. Because any other time she act like she didn’t realize that it’s been 9yrs just for the applauses lol
😅😅😄 Tamera Humble Brag Housely gotta love her
Dridri1212 lmao 😂 No you didn’t give sus a new middle name
It was an affair. End of story.
Congratulations. Nobody said it wasn't. Who you beefin with?
this is very common. this is why communication in a relationship is needed
1:20 = mood!
“Girl stop!” I didn’t realize she meant she was actually acting on those emotions... that is out of control! She was one “I love you” away from a physical affair. Either way, this sounds just as bad.
Wow, Tamera just checked Amanda ✔️
No she didn't.
Quite classy like 👏
Y’all are silly
she should slap Amanda
“I’m mixing up my white boys!” Now if a white woman said that about black men it would be a problem. Insert double standard.
I agree with Tam- it’s hard, but being honest at the start of an emotional affair will help protect your marriage.
Because it is a problem to say black boys when you are talking about black men. Put some respect on it! Happy Black History Month!!🧘🏿♂️🧘🏿♂️🕺🏿💃🏿🙋🏿♂️🙋🏿♀️
Please she us not coming from a racist stance like white people
@@lorijackson7008 EXACTLY!!! DUMBEST COMPARISON EVER! YOU TRIED IT!!!
damn imagine being this uneducated and out-of-touch. As a white person, I'm sorry that people like Lauren Matthews still think this way in 2020.
The lady in the audience had me dying. "Girl stop" lmao 😂!!
"I'm mixing up my white boys". Imagine if someone said, "I'm mixing up my black boys", that would be a topic on this show and Loni would have a whole lot to say about it.
Alec B THIS IS NOOOOT THE FIRST TIME either! How are you gonna talk about black people & how you want them to be at least respected when you can’t even go about your conversation without being disrespectful to another race. It’s stupid
But of course she’s old & wise 🤦🏻♀️ she can say whatever she wants cause it’s so damn funny
Alec B her saying that doesn’t hold the same weight, it doesn’t perpetuate any oppression. Stop with the false equivalencies
@You Tried It! whites were enslaved by black ppl. who do u think conquered Europe back in the day🙄
I love the whole “imagine if roles were reversed” question when it has been reversed, for years. And nobody gives a damn when it happens to black people so keep that same energy 🙃
jonny davis while the moors did rule over Spain for over 400 years, it has no impact on global racial hierarchy or systematic racism in modern day.
4:16 Tamera went black real quick !!!
🤣 can I just say I was a child and I was SO upset she broke up with nick.
Mannnnnnn
Jaie Elizabeth Same!!! Newlyweds on MTV felt like a big lie! 😭😫
Absolutely!!
Me too!!!
Nick totally played the victim when they separated.
Queen sugar and I was hurting for him 😂
She was his sunshine after the rain in my head.
I love how Adrienne started singinggggg loll
"I wanna do some nasty things!" Adrienne's next hit. Thank you, thank you.
Leonard Salazar 😂😂
Gota have a FIRST hit 🤣💀💯
@@GQJEDIglobal Okay, then it's her planned second hit. The more, the better! 🤣
@@leonardsalazar4523 💀
“Nick laceyyy 😂”
The best part
I'm having an emotional affair with myself. I have no other choice because I'm single. Lol
kimani I'm deed
I think if you're in an emotional affair and want to be honest, its a bad idea to tell your partner you like someone else. It's much better if you tell them you're losing interest in them, just confront your partner on what's happening between the two of you before you tell them you're cheating on them.
Na Na nicely stated... I like this.
It’s not necessarily that you’re losing interest, it’s more so the relationship is lacking something probably intimacy outside of the physical. You’re right on word choice tho.
@Jerico Thompson it's not when you will still reveal it.
@Jerico Thompson what are you confused on? I said it's not deceit when you will still reveal to your partner that you're cheating on them.
@@NaNa-wy2tk the fact that the person is cheating is already deceitful.
I absolutely LOVE Tamara. One of the problems with society is we compromise on what's right and lean toward what's comfortable. The goals in marriage should be longevity and effective communication, we can't get there by keeping secrets.
I wanna do some nasty things. 🎶🎤
Now this song is stuck in my head. 😂😂😂
Singing as I do the dishes "I wanna do some nasty things!" LMBO 😂😂😂😂😂
Thanks Jeanie for being the first one to explain what an emotional affair is in a way that makes sense to me. I honestly never understood the meaning behind the term until now.
Cheating is never ok no matter what, however having seen newlyweds I can see what she was lacking in her marriage Nick was hateful to her and distant from her and treated her like a child. I'm not saying he's a bad guy necessarily I just dont think they were right for eachother.
Tamera takes her marriage seriously and I love it!!
That lady @ 4:19 is like, I'm Not Saying NOTHING to Him!!!! 😂
Dead on! I was married to my ex husband and thought things were normal and ok until I started to feel a connection to someone at work. First thing I did was speak up to my husband and said “what am I suppose to do with this? How do I react to this and how am I suppose to feel about this? Something is off and we need to figure this out!” And all he did was shut down and put absolutely no effort in. Needless to say our marriage ended shorty after. I didn’t plan or look for that emotional connection but it happened and I tried to initiate working through it. My ex just wasn’t comfortable or willing to fight through whatever was wrong with us. Because if that I knew and decided that I couldn’t go in with him if that was his choice.
Even though I’ve never liked Jessica’s style of music, I’ve always been drawn to her! I ordered her book and I can’t wait to read it. I hope she’s doing well 💜
You know Loni black when she don’t even know who Nick Lachey is 😂
Not just black but older and black. Lol.
I only know him from charmed lol.
I agree with Tamera, I've been in dry spells with my SO when we were going through tough times. The emotional intimacy wasn't there. Funny thing is even if you're not looking for it outside your relationship, it can find you. I never let it happen, but when the thought or desire came to, I was quick to tell my SO my thoughts and feelings. We had to talk about it to get back on track. It does take honesty, self awareness, respect for yourself, and respect for your partner to address those issues.
Yesss be honest or it will haunt your relationship and probably come back to bite you. The “truth” is always looking for a way to be seen or heard. It will find a way...can’t hide it.
I love how Loni is the mom, calming everyone down
This is so true, i havent actually done it but i have been in a point in my relationship where I felt so alone and just wanted attention from someone, i wanted to feel loved and appreciated. So INSTEAD of going to someone else, I told my man straight up “ hey something isn’t right, i’m not getting what i need from you my mind is honestly starting to wonder from our relationship, we really need to fix this” and we fixed it! We’re almost 6 years in, & have two beautiful children AND are getting married this year. It’s so important to be upfront with your partner.
You are a real one
@@smoothmentalitysmooth9226 thank you so much
Emotional is even worse 😳
It's sad when your partner stops being honest. There are always going to be people in the world looking to breakup relationships. Those people find some sort of crack in any relationship that they can exploit. Then use that knowledge as a wedge in the couple's relationship till eventually everything falls apart.
Adrienne breaking into that song along with her expressions got me hollering 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣. She can be hilarious at times 🤣🤣🤣
I think something we as people in relationships don’t realize is that the type of affair you first end up in won’t end up being the same once you’re trying to get out of it... so for men they may physically cheat and might end up having emotions based off of the fact that the SEX IS SOOOO GOOD... he’s all confused thinking the sex means they are meant for each other when in reality the sex is just that... sex... whereas a woman may end up in a emotional affair BUT by the time she’s been with that man enough she actually ends wanting to give up the goods to him because he treats her so good... why not treat him with something special... neither one is right but sometime things do happen and we as humans do have hormones and things... so I suggest the safest and most logical route would be to be honest as soon as you start having a wandering eye
Well said
Amen!
"I WANNNAAAA DOOO SOME NASTY THINGS" lol I'm so done through with Adrienne!! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Those ladies in the audience looked crazy. As if they were promoting emotional cheating. Now imagine if their boyfriends/husbands did this, they would want the truth. But I guess everyone wants to be on camera for something.
This was done to me by my partner of 7 years. It hurt like hell and we never could bounce back. It truly is the worst type of cheating or affair! And always someone close or af work...my man was talking to a girl from work so you never know.
Tamer got married in a good age,she was mature,Jessica was too young to be in a marriage when she was with nick...ev1 makes mistakes,u just hv to learn from it 🙏🏽
Plus Nick was mean to her, I feel like he treated her like she was stupid, so she got attached to somebody who treated her like the queen she is. Unfortunately that person was married too, and idk what was missing in his life why he was having an emotional affair with her. I'm not defending them, but I'm not judging them either. None of us are perfect
🤣🤣🤣loni :"I'm messing up my white boys".I love you ladies soooooo much💓
I LOVE JESSICA SIMPSON PERIOD EVERYONE HAS A PAST AND BEEN THROUGH THINGS! I CANT WAIT TILL I GET THAT BOOK
Now if Nick LaChey had an "emotional" affair with someone else while he was with Jessica.....
krisj827 SAY THAT!!!
Thank you there's nothing wrong with honesty it helps the marriage heal.
Yessss Tamera we heard you loud and clear👏👏👏👏👏
Ugh i wish i can meet Jeanie i feel she can heal me with just her deep convos😂
Love her!!!!!!
Wow this is such a great topic!! I’m already reading the book (listening on audible) and it’s so good. 😊❤️💕
Affairs of the heart is way worse than physical contact and she also admitted the song let him fly she did was about johnny Knoxville not nick. So that's more omg moment she did cheat on nick. Sending love letters to Johnny and flirting with him on set and she was scared that nick came to set in baton rouge when she was filming. She def cheated. Nobody's perfect.
I like that you called it an "affair of the heart". That's a better description. I've been cheated on by an ex. It hurts. But to me when you connect on an emotional level it may hit differently. But it's the same thing. She didn't cheat sexually. But her heart and emotions were with someone other than her husband. But she's owning up to it.
Whether or not it qualifies is between Jessica and Nick. Every couple decides for themselves where the boundaries are. That said, I think a clear sign when you know you've crossed a boundary is when you take steps to hide it from your partner. That's when you know.
Intimacy is everything!
@@amethystwolf24572 agreed
Omg I was wondering about when she cried performing that song. She seemed so over Nick that I was confused as to why she was so emotional over him. So it was about Johnny???
The Real giving our relationship advice!!! The show is timeless 💜💙❤
Tamera rarely talks to the audience like that 😂😂
Tamera, thank you!! I have been telling my clients this all the time thank god i catch them when they are single most of the time! Congratulations on your nine years :)
9yrs is not a long time Tamera. Maybe in Hollywood. But not in real life. Call us back in 20yrs time..
2:59 Amanda killed me 😅😅😅😅😅well she makes alot of shoes she walked out of it😂😂😂😂😂
I just can’t stand Lonnie. Please ditch her. She’s just too negative and obnoxious!
I honestly thank the ladies of The Real because I learned how to communicate in relationships and in life from this show, their TH-cam Channels & Podcasts. Honesty is always the best policy and it’s not what you say it’s how you say it. 💗
You guys really makes me so happy I love you all I am I. South Korea
Own you before they do was the most POWERFUL statement ever.
I'm sorry emotional cheating is not this. It is when you one sidely emotionally commit yourself to someone else while being in a relationship and that person flirting back. But what they were doing was an AFFAIR POINT BLANK PERIOD!!! Just cause you don't kiss or have sex does not mean that you aren't cheating. What she did was cheating she just wanted to feel less bad so she called it and emotional affair. But if you are telling someone else that you love them that is cheating God forbid I'd rather find out my partner kissed someone else than said I love you to someone else. That is just disgusting and shameful and she is using it to make money and probably reopen wounds in her ex-husband who is HAPPILY MARRIED WITH CHILDREN THANK GOD!!!
Amen!!!!
emotional affair is the same as physical
Emotional affair is emotional cheating same thing still cheating
Ade's little song was too funny! Tam, Jeannie, and Ade were 100% correct especially Tam. You have to be honest and communicate with your partner about what you are feeling. You won't fix your marriage if you don't hit the issue at the root rather than avoiding it all together.
Why is Jessica suddenly bearing her soul? There's no point in talking about that. Some stuff you take to the grave.
Miss Raquel She needs the attention. She has an addictive personality; food, alcohol, attention, etc.
"Own you before they do." Let her speak her truth.
It's the old: What he doesn't know won't hurt him tactic. 😂😂
I know I’m in the smaller percentage but I am hurt more by an emotional affair than a physical one. I’m not devastated by his greed that led to a grind. Im threatened by him sharing with someone else his heart and mind.
Peridotfellow I feel the same way. Been there, it’s hard on the heart.
This was by far my favorite episode topic!👏