He has no imagination. Who says you’ve to live together after marriage? Who says you’ve to marry for love Marriage is a legal contract and laws favor marriage. He also forgot there’s something called marriage agreement. One can marry someone to get tax breaks, shared health benefits, residency somewhere, pension once one dies, … People really think only inside a tiny box in this thread! Who says marriage has anything to do with live! It’s a legal convenience… And why don’t people talk! Why don’t people figure these details of doing what we want prior to getting together! This thread shows how little people learn in life! Negative & misogynistic.
I got cheated, stolen and divorced at 39 and decided to follow 50+ channels like this and thoroughly read the comments to learn from older men and try to salvage the second half of my life. Thanks to all seniors that spread this vital life knowledge.
@ Great question! I have made and uploaded several videos about prenuptial agreements. A prenup is only as good as its ability to be upheld in court. I definitely recommend consulting with an experienced family law attorney in your specific jurisdiction to take a deep dive into whether a prenup makes sense on your particular situation. Many jurisdictions are not “prenup friendly”, while other jurisdictions are more “prenup friendly”. Also - do not write your own prenup. Have an experienced family law attorney do it.
Exactly what my ex did. She thought she had found the gold with hubby 2, but he was a grifter with nothing but a rented lake house. She found a very good retirement plan with #3 since he was already retired with a good AT&T pension. She is now the pensioner's #5 wife. Best part about it: I never hear a peep from her.
😊 I'm so glad that both my father and my husband never took this advice! My father enjoyed 13 years of a very happy marriage (until his death) after marrying at age 60. My husband and I married when he was 50 and we just happily celebrated our 26th wedding anniversary. Most of my life I've ignored similar advice and I'm so much better off for it. There are many, happy marriages after age 50.
@@tinalewis6782 Thanks for watching and joining the conversation! I’m happy to hear about your father and husband. Everyone and every relationship is different. Glad things worked out for you and your father!
@tinalewis. if everyone's belief on marriages is like a total struggle, then most people will get it. I am glad you had a stronghold that life is better shared with another person🥰, and it will make you happy, you certainly got and EXPERIENCED WHAT YOU BELIEVE. ❤
Why not have a prenumptial agreement then? I was married to an abusive man that made triple my salary, I told his lawyer, I have my dignity, and didn't want a single dime from him! I wasn't raised to be a gold digger. The lawyer was quite shocked because he was accustomed to dealing with unscrupulous people.
A friend got remarried in her 50s to a guy that seemed iffy at best. It lasted about 15 years. She'd worked all of her life and had a significant wad built up. He had nothing and got half. Don't know how anyone could trust enough to marry.
@@CalvinMorris-cf8jk 29 years and prenup is best and marriage is wonderful for many of my friends. It’s helpful in times of medical issues and yes you can get a will but who tells the doctors and them this??? I’ll get married again
Married briefly twice. Supported two husbands. Haven’t even been for coffee with a guy in 19 years. (I always wonder why ,I’m average) Will never ever marry again. Will never live with a man again. I’d like some male friends (I have two now) who live nearby. All my life I loved being an introvert and being alone. Now I have more confidence and am less shy would like some more friendships to do things. I do everything alone. But it is what it is and I’ve been blessed to inherit enough money to buy a house and care for myself as I age. What we don’t have in one area of our lives we often receive in another. I’m very grateful.
I just turned 55, divorced 1 month before my birthday. It's not the first, but it will be the last. My ex-husband used me financially until I put a stop to it and then he wanted to divorce. I don't make enough money to be the only income. I have two children from a previous marriage. Raising kids is not all ponies and rainbows. Good for you for not making the same mistakes I did!
You go boy, I am right there behind you after getting my first divorce in my early 30's and now like you, I am debt free, house is paid for and I am loving being free to do what I want when I want without having to justify it to someone else!
I got divorced in 2017 at the age of 57. I’ve lived alone ever since. Not in a relationship and not looking for one. My life is better now than it ever was when I was married.
@@MikeS-7 actually, I get more s3x now, as a single male, than I ever did married. Tons of travel, playing, motorcycles, mtn bikes, and adventures. Marriage is for IDIOTS
We’re happily married and got married after 50. Marriage is more than a good relationship. It’s about creating a family and more importantly it’s about both people being committed to having each other’s back.
My sentiments exactly 💯❤... you can meet the love 💕 of your life at any age...yes even after 50! The problem is people have just become too greedy.... it's all about possessions and money 🤑💰. VERY few care about the good old fashioned love 💕 companionship, having a best friend, having a travel 🧳 mate, ETC. Life 🧬 is about people and love and intimacy......just pray 🙏 and hope against hope that you meet a mirror image of yourself: kind, caring, loving, real and humane human being 🤞🤞🤞🤞
I am in my early 60s, divorced 8 years ago - I feel lonely from time to time. I occasionally date for female company - but to be honest I love being able to do what I want when I want. There are not compromises, no hassles, no arguments…I love the freedom.
You can marry totally out of convenience. It’s a legal contract it’s not an emotional contract. All laws favor marriage, it doesn’t mean your to live together! This lawyer has no imagination! And apparently many others don’t.
@ here in New Zealand you certainly don’t need to live together nor married. The laws apply if any reasonable person would consider you like a married couple
@ I married a lazy idiot! He came after me for spousal support during the divorce and he got NOTHING! 🤣 All you men are the same! You act like you’re providers but most of you are lazy and incompetent and incapable!
@ making money and owning a home isn’t an exclusive ability that only a man is capable of. My ex lives with his mom in a house with her… when men have no idea how to take up the space they are meant to occupy women are quite capable of filling that space as well as holding their own space. This is an adaptability trait that men don’t seem to be able to possess. If you really think being a man comes down to making a good income and owning a house then men really aren’t much! Maybe create a better definition of yourself and work towards achieving that.
@@Conan_the_Based …I love my children. But if a wife makes it to the end with her husband, and hopefully she’s not the one who killed him, she should definitely have something coming her way too.
@@Conan_the_Based another insult is a con-man posing as a friend/bus. associate to your retired parents, until almost all of their savings are gone. No inheritance to look forward to either
I married for the first time at 50 and it's the best experience in general, but more importantly, it's spiritually more rewarding than what I could ever have imagined. I guess mine is successful because I took my time to find someone who recognizes the importance of the spiritual aspects of marriage and is capable of spiritual beliefs. That's the secret "glue" to a successful marriage that lasts even now in our old age.
I had a boyfriend in his 50’s that didn’t want to marry me. He just wanted to live together. I said no. Everyone should decide what the best course of action is for their happiness.
@@Mitzi73 Why was marriage so important to you? I agree that everyone should decide what is best for their own happiness. Can you be happy without being married?
@@CarolFremel-my4hswho else could he possibly be committed to while they are co-habitating. He wanted commitment without bringing the state into it. The contract was more important than commitment apparently. He clearly doesn’t wNt to he anyones retirement plan. Assuming the worst of his character for that is quite telling and makes one seem bitter.
I’m 75 & I couldn’t agree with you more. Something I’ve observed in life, is that many people don’t know how to entertain themselves. Get a hobby, find an interest. Either one of these will provide the opportunity to meet other interesting people. The intellectual pursuit stimulates the brain and provides hours of pleasurable activity. What you perceive as loneliness is perhaps your brain spinning its wheels without gaining any traction. Find something to do.
My relationship with a gentleman felt smothering. After I broke up with him I took up ham radio, do community volunteering, learned the piano, play my flute, and have a room full of my artwork. All this after 2 years and age 60. Now I have a companion. A fun fellow who also enjoys as much space as me.
My relationship with a gentleman felt smothering. After I broke up with him I took up ham radio, do community volunteering, learned the piano, play my flute, and have a room full of my artwork. All this after 2 years at age 60. Now I have a companion. A fun fellow who also enjoys as much space as me.
I'm 55 and never been married, no kids, but I always wanted that. But most of my friends, family, co-workers, church members, etc have had nasty divorces with lost kids, finances and emotional distress. Then most of the couples who have stayed with their spouses are not happy at all and constantly argue and cheat. Now one of them is now taking care of her demented husband that she never liked. So I think my life turned out ok.
I’m almost 50 and same-never been married and no kids (never wanted them). I have only seen a handful of “successful” marriages compared to the HIGH number of dumpster fires you have described. 😬 I’d like companionship, but my solitude is just fine and actually very enjoyable!
@@jdh1969 Same exact situation for me. Over 60 now. Everyone says, "why is a nice, attractive woman like you alone?" I say, "Better alone than in bad company." I absolutely don't know anyone - male or female - who is happy in their marriage. And the majority - though not all - have big problems with their kids. Why bother?
I wish someone had given my grandma this advice. She was widowed at 54 when my grandfather died. She got married twice more. Second husband turned out to be an abusive gold digger. Third husband turned out to be an ornery old coot who expected to be waited upon hand & foot. After those two messy and expensive divorces, grandma finally learned not to fall for men’s false charms. She embraced the single life and lived out the last two decades of her life in peace before passing away at the age of 92.
As a retired (and widowed) attorney, I stood up and applauded this very sage advice! There’s not a snowball’s chance in he!! That I would remarry now. As a woman, I and thoroughly enjoying my solitude; it’s the first time I am responsible to and for me and me alone and I am loving it. I understand that some would not( mostly men, as they seem to be incapable of making a box of Mac and cheese) but people *listen* to this man’s advice. Do Not get remarried- shack up if you want constant companionship, but remarriages end in divorce much more often than first marriages. Listen to the man - he knows whereof he speaks.
A perfect marriage or relationship is an illusion; there's no universal playbook for making them work. What's effective for one couple may not apply to another. Nevertheless, I've come to understand that there's always a solution to be found. Half a decade ago, my wife and I faced such trials in our marriage that divorce seemed inevitable. Yet, through perseverance and determination, we navigated through the rough waters and emerged stronger, reunited, and more resilient
There is a lot of sense in what you just said and I hope mine works the same way too, we are currently separated but I cant live without her, I love her so much. wish I can get her back I can do anything to have her back, we have tried therapy amongst other things
Marriage after 50 is a TERRIBLE idea. No benefit and the legal liability to your spouse is huge. Don't like giving away half your stuff and making monthly payment to your ex instead of keeping everything for yourself? Don't get married. If he/she insists, run like hell. The chance of a second or third marriage failing is much higher than the first one.
I think someone could still get married after fifty… if one is worried about financial assets, have a prenuptial agreement signed. Wouldn’t that work to one’s advantage?
I married at 36 and lost her to cancer 26 years later. Before dying she told me to never remarry. Though I had never said it to her I knew a long time ago that I wouldn't.
@bphennesy Why would anyone say something like that? Sorry, but that is selfish. When you're gone, you're gone. The partner needs to move on and be happy.
@@bphennesy I lost my spouse to cancer after 30 years of marriage. We owned an insurance company and believed in life insurance. Before he died he said you should get married if you want to, but with the eight figure life insurance policy he left me, no way am I going to fund a great life style for a grifter, loser or user. I am perfectly happy doing what ever I want, whenever I want, trying to have my last check bounce and will leave whatever is left to my children. No, prenups don’t work as great as people think. Ask my brother. I live in community property state.
@@cgschow1971I agree that is pretty messed up thing to say especially knowing you are going to die soon and it won’t matter to you anyway. It sounds so delusional.
It’s scary out there after 50. My ex married last year and the new wife has total control of his finances now and has taken his children out of his will! She has total control of who he talks to, so no family connection. Young woman are in for the money dear man.
The problem is a lot of non- promiscuous women will only sleep with a man who is their husband. So if they want a woman like that for a companion in life, they have to commit. Even if they are widows or divorced, they don't like the idea of sleeping around. So that's one factor.
@@elainer8288 Thanks for watching and commenting. A man can still commit without getting married and bringing state law into his life and finances in the event the marriage ends before death of one of the parties. I’m absolutely fine with commitment. It is marriage under state law that is a problem. Some of the best, most loving relationships I have seen are two people who are committed to each other, but not married.
If two people get married, they become family and are commited to having each other's back. They are fully commited to protecting you, and you fully commited to protecting them. You know you have each other's back. It's a full commitment with actions that speak a lot louder than words. It's not the same thing.
@kjhnsn I meant to say a lot of women don't want to sleep around. If physical intimacy is not part of a serious relationship, they prefer to be alone and celibate. Very common for women to make this choice.
I'm over 50, never feel lonely, have a great relationship, and have no intention of marrying ever. All it took was filling out the adoption papers at the city's Animal Control office.
Well… I am 55 years old and got married for the first and last time at age 50. I was a bachelor most of my life and sincerely appreciate the so called “ball and chain.” Had I known marriage was this good, I would’ve gotten married 20 years ago. 😊
@@WeeWeeIII Sure, sure, but you preferred to avoid comittment and change and use women during your young years. Older players always settle down sooner or later.
@@Anna-fm7hh I didn't "use" women. There were no victims only volunteers respectfully. Additionally, I did not want to marry until I was ready. I love women and respect women 100%. I was raised by women (the men were cowards in my family). Perhaps, you are judging me harshly without knowing my situation. I understand. "To Thine Own Self Be True."
I have a wonderful marriage of 31 years tomorrow December 4th. If I become single I will never remarry. I’ve seen a lot of vultures circling others who have become single. They were looking for a roof over their head and someone to look after them. No Thankyou.
My husband and I got married at 53 ( me) and 68 (him) and we have been married for 7 years. I am divorced after a 31 year marriage and he was never before married. My family loves him and he knows it. His family hates me and so do many of his friends ...and I know it! Still it is a loving union and we renew our vows every year. I have never been happier in my life and it is true for him too! I would lay down my life for this wonderful man ! In my own situation and how I cope....I don't mind being disliked by miscreants. Often when you enter a person's life when they are older...their people are not going to like the change. It's their problem...the first task is to dismiss destructive people from either side. The most important task is to pray together. People who love you will love that you are happy and cared with deep commitment... for and people who don't like it...they probably never loved you. They had other motivations that have been displaced by the marriage...and the displacement of their interest is why they don't like the person with whom you share commitment.
These advices are welcome but each person is different from the other. Just don't be dumb and use your experience to identify a good partner. I've got married at age og 59 yo with a adorable widow woman who had 2 kids. After 15 years together, I'm still happy. It was the best thing I've done in my life. I finally found my soulmate and loving children, now adults. And love and respect surrounds us all the time. I wish to all my friends to have the same. But I'm sure it's not simple. Just don't be stupid.
After the end of my marriage of 22 years, I felt that loneliness and sought out companionship and yes remarried after just 2 years. Thankfully a pre nup saved me after a year of marriage and the 3 of us, (her adult son was living at home) went our separate ways without a significant loss of my assets. I doubt I will ever marry again, too much risk if it doesn't work out. Bought my first new car last month without having justifying it to anyone. Felt empowered, like I was 18 again! Great advice!
Came here because my widowed Dad is contemplating a second marriage because he is so lonely. The woman he is dating is someone he met at church and my Dad would never live with a her without marriage - he is too honorable. My sense is that a pre-nup is a good idea for him and will talk with him about it, and possibly about putting his house into a trust since it came through my mother and her parents, while recognizing a second wife would have impact on his retirement assets. Those are his to spend as he chooses. My Dad would want to see her taken care of, which we kids would honor. After seeing all the negative comments from men on this channel and the content itself, I have even more regard for my husband who is honorable like my Dad. We are 28 years strong with a grandchild on the way - a blessing to see a new generation. If I lost my husband, I doubt I'd remarry. The chance of finding another honorable man is so low, and I am both independent and comfortable alone. Very glad God made me that way since most women spend their final years living alone, but more especially because I know I found a rare one.
I'm not meaning to be rude but you can not call yourself independent and comfortable alone because you aren't either of those if you are married and have been for that many years.
Marriage is for women. If it was for kids then they wouldn't be able to file for divorce while yall have kids. Stop falling for the trap. She will get child support and alimony and your house and your pension, and your 401k instead of just child support. Stop sending our fellow men to the slaughter house with that get married for kids trick
You forgot to warn people about those states where cohabitation creates a presumption of marriage. 'Gubbmint' can just come in and decide FOR YOU that you're already married, even without any ceremony or license.
Never allow one to move in and start using your address! You could easily find your butt homeless and living in a cardboard box under the highway overpass.
Or get married with all the proper paperwork to make a prenuptial agreement stick. Is there any reason a contract couldn't be written that you can not be considered common law married? How does this even work if you have a same sex roommate for long enough couldn't this nowadays be considered common law marriage? 😂😂 my aunt and mom have lived together 6 years 😂
59 and a forever bachelor. Watched all of my buddy's get divorce raped. Hit the gym this a.m. and walked 18 later. Marriage is a Business Plan......for women. Timmy C Arizona
It's brutal. Never again. I had a woman tell me, trying to be helpful, that I can always earn more money. How about I keep what I earned instead of some gender biased court legally thefting it. She can earn the money. I already earned it and watch it get legally thefted. Never again.
I was 31 when I realized that marriage would never be a thing for me. As the years rolled on the realization that I made the right decision strengthened. What was practical in time's past hasn't been for decades now.
Turning 50 in January, never married, no kids…. And the way the world had become very happy about this. I don’t nock marriage, BUT…. Think 90% get married under wrong preconceived ideas.
Was it worth it? Making the choice seeing everyone else pair up, but being free to pursue any and all ambitions I 35 male, spend my days doing psychology working out or learning karate I'm kinda stuck on this road, divorce is terrifying
You're right regarding the way the world is now - spiritually unaware and without a relationship with God. Marriage was intended to be successful because two people believe in the spiritual importance of marriage. Without that spiritual "glue" holding together the infrastructure that is marriage, it stands an empty chance of surviving. One must have a strong spiritual relationship with God in order to find a partner who feels the same for a marriage to endure the hardships that are inevitable in life. If you do establish a relationship with God, and then have a spiritual understanding to find a partner with the same beliefs, it is so worth it! The best experience in this life!
@@morotetsuke If men continue to avoid or dodge marriage, the State will find another way. That's why there is Common Law wife. The State cannot afford to let men get put of their grip. They've done it for a while and see how men voted for Trump.
Yes. Men talk about how women are the ones who benefit from marriage, but it's often the women who do the lion's share of the housework and end up having to babysit/micromanage a grown man.
Excellent advice! After my husband passes, I will never remarry and the house, cars, and money will be all mine! They will never get shared with anyone.
Thanks for this video. I appreciate the time that went into making it. I'm a 56 year old woman - single, never married, no children. Marriage really is a contract between two people and the state. Unfortunately, past a certain age, some people are approaching you because they want something, not because they like you or are interested in forming a relationship with you. Also, past the age of 50, people have already accumulated assets (if they've worked hard and/or are fortunate), they usually have children, and they usually have established lives. There can also be a certain amount of bitterness within a person if a previous marriage or two has not worked out. For all these reasons, getting married and co-mingling assets is far more complicated. I don't believe I'll ever marry although I wouldn't necessarily rule it out. I worked in U.S. healthcare for 20 years and I think the only possible reason to get married is if you have a long term partner and you don't want issues to pop up at the end of life, although I'm sure these issues can also be handled with a good attorney. In the U.S., having healthcare is another reason people get married. I've known long term partners who didn't want to involve the state but got married so one of them could acquire healthcare benefits.
I think after mid-life and average wealth (100k to 3 mil), low chance of recovery. If a guy wants to get married, do it extra early. If it works, great. If not, very little lost . . . with a lot of wisdom gained.
@@mgtowski395 exactly most men who are divorced by their wife end up ruined permanently or closed to destroyed. Yet sadly millions of young men still fall for marriage to western value raised women of all races, religious and countries all over.
I feel your pain. Two weeks after 'celebrating' our 30th wedding anniversary (I was in my mid 50's) I found out she had been cheating on me. Told me she didn't need me anymore so I had to start from scratch while her life carried on. Now the only female I trust is my dog. Thirty. Damn. Years!
I’m an average 70 y/o guy. Got married for the first and only time at age 59. Why? Because I lost my job due to corporate downsizing and I needed the health insurance that my then girlfriend (soon to be wife) job provided. We’re still going strong years later. So, it can work! P.S. NO KIDS!
The only reason you should get married is if you want to raise a family. At 56, I will not be starting to raise a family. That ship sailed many years ago. I am going to work, invest, and retire on my own terms. After a 14-year marriage that ended because she wanted to be with my best friend of the time, I do not have time for these games in my future.
I got lucky. I drank the kool aid about supporting your wife in all things. Put her through college. She started making ridiculous money and had the affair etc. so I don’t have to pay alimony because she made more. Caught her hiding some small assets so I got to keep the house which skyrocketed 5 times what I paid for it in equity. And the kids child support was negligible. I know other guys sleeping on their moms couch at 55/60 paying mortgages and alimony for ex wives who’s live in lovers now have their feet up on their couch watching their tvs. Barely making enough to cover has to get to work.
Could be worse. At least she got a decent job. The usual story is the guy pays for her Masters degree in some useless field than decides to become a housewife THAN she ends up screwing around on you while you are at work slaving away.
@carllelendt5452 *Women* are obsolete. I mean literally, think about it: if they don't work, cook, clean, sew, shop, maintain the house or fork, then I ask you: what ARE they good for?
Im 41 and never been married, and never will. I was told one time if jumping out of a plane with a parachute had over a 50% failure rate like marriages do, then why would you ever do it? Good point
From a woman’s perspective, marrying a guy over 50 who likely has an ex wife and kids to deal with would just be an absolute NO. They typically have zero boundaries and want to be the “Disneyland Dad” it’s just too messy. Ladies…make your own money and live your own life. You’ll live much longer 😂
Jonathan Noble I really admire your honesty even when it might sound counterintuitive, no other lawyer cares this much for people, thank you SO MUCH for all these videos. God bless you ❤❤ I'd like you make a video about cohabitation. Greetings from Argentina (South America)
I'm 56, twice divorced, going through child support payments for the 2nd time in my life...for adopted kids. I'll be paying until I'm 66. Only 7 years of my adult life with no child support.
I am 67 and never been married with no kids. There was no mention of the "never-marrieds". I wanted to be married for the longest time in my life but it never happened. And now I have given up completely and feel alright about it. I guess a good part of the reason why I feel like I don't need to get a woman for love is because I've some hormonal treatments due to prostate cancer I had. I know of some guys around my age who have never been married. They still hope to get married. All those whom I've known over 40 and got married for the first time always ended in disaster. With the never-marrieds, if you over 40 and end up with someone who's been married before, that would be a bigger disaster than if you ended up with someone never-married.
I got remarried at 56 following the death of my wife. I got a prenup agreement about how to divide property, particularly my property, in event of a divorce. Darn glad I did as it actually stopped her from following through on several divorce threats over the last 25 years. She realized she would end up broke.
I am in my 50's and happily married to someone who is my best friend. We've been married for nearly 30 years. If something were to happen to my spouse or the marriage, I think that I would want to remarry, but after watching Later Daters on Netflix, I don't know how likely it would be. The show opened my eyes to how difficult it is for people in their 50's and 60's to date, even when both parties are interested in marriage, because of how rigid most people are at that stage in their lives and because of the baggage most people bring into their relationships. It's a miracle that people in their 50's, 60's or 70's are able to find love at all! I would definitely bring up a prenup and not remarry without one.
First of all congratulations on your happy marriage. You have a point with a whole pre-nup idea but, if someone brings up a pre-nup it's like he or she is already planning the divorce ahead of the marriage, (this was said by a famous divorce attorney who's name escapes me). I believe that people need to thread carefully when marrying at any age and pay attention to how someone acts in various situations. Generally speaking people will reveal themselves one way or the other. The true test is will we pay attention to reality or get swept up in emotion?
Thank you! This is such valuable information and I totally agree. I've already been married and have no desire to do it again. I date but I keep my own home. At 50+ it can be very difficult to loose half your savings due to another divorce, as there is not enough time to recoup your losses. Id rather travel, hang out with friends and enjoy my own space.
And who will wipe your ass in not much time? Who will treat you? For now, doctors and nurses are humans that means - they had to be children. If you are not some kind of a great artist or scientist you will be profiting from other women’s efforts. Other women who can’t retire at 49 bc they raised children - what impaired their career and their income - who will sooner than later take care of your smart ass. And also I am very curious how much your assets will be worth in the world without children or rather - when next generation will be 1/2 or 1/3 of yours? Maybe they will think - if you don’t have children we don’t give a fuck about you. There are not many of us and we don’t want to take care of you. We have our own parents and grandparents- people live long nowadays- to provide for. We don’t want our money to be used for smart asses who had fun when our parents were struggling.
@@zumurudlilit "Take care of me"? 'wipe your ass"? Your vulgarity is typical of younger people nowadays sadly. I would certainly not accept 'help' of any kind as my grandmothers before me. I take care of myself like they did. I had to retire early to take care of my mother who had Alzheimers. I was blessed by God to be able to do that for her. It was many years out of my career and set me back quite a bit but I was ready for it. I would never send my parents to a home. Never. Yet the homes are filled with soggy-diapered seniors. It is an epidemic. It disgusts me. So stop being a smart ass and go to work as I did.
Great advice, having a blended family with your kids and grandkids and their kids and grandkids rarely goes over well. Tying up your assets with another person at this stage of your life is very risky business, emotions tend to take over rather than common sense. Health issues are another huge red flag, you could end up spending your life’s savings providing care for your new spouse and then the security for your old age no longer exists.
I just overheard a discussion between a couple of Middle Aged men yesterday. One man was telling the other, “ yeah.. I don’t really like where I live anymore. I’m thinking if a met someone, we could go in together on a house… I’m thinking about something in the $800k range which I could afford on my own, I just don’t want to tap in to my retirement” …. Women beware
As a divorce attorney, you come off as quite jaded and I presume that is because that is what you see all the time. There is a lot of good with a formal bond and certainly a commitment that people are making to each other they will not just cut loose when times get a little bumpy. It is a union among family, friends, state and for those who believe with God as well. After 50 both parties are old enough and experienced enough to know what they want or don't want. If one party happens to pass away to to health or accident, does your advise still stand for the other not to get remarried? I think you should re-think your message and the negative vibes it sends. People are very lucky if they found love once and to find it a second time a real blessing. Life is not about the accumulation of material things but of relationships and bonds and commitments. You cannot take your wealth with you when you die but you can leave behind that memory that you are too jaded, too scared or too selfish to re-commit to someone very special in your life.
@@Robert8455 Thank you for watching and commenting! I appreciate all comments, not only comments that agree with the message in my videos. The problem I have with marriage after 50 for most people is the awful divorce process if the marriage becomes non-functioning. I am all for a committed loving relationship for all adults. This can be accomplished without bringing state (divorce) laws into one’s life and finances. I’m not jaded. Just practical. Thank you again for watching and joining the discussion!
Most women will still insist on the ring! Especially in the more mature age group. They were raised to marry. They are not available for anything else! 🤷♀️
@@ellenmorse8559 Thank you for watching and commenting! Giving someone a ring is fine, if that is what they want. But marrying that person is a whole different level of risk. I know plenty of beautiful women in the 50 and over age group who would love to be in a monogamous relationship with a successful, intelligent, fit man without getting married. The downside risk of getting married is too great for most successful men over 50. There are exceptions, but they are rare.
@ Within the upper echelons of society, women nowadays are equally concerned. After 50, they most likely own real estate, investment portfolios, lucrative businesses and positions of high remuneration. Marriage is still a good bet if both parties are in accord about the safety of their assets. That’s why we have you to forge an ironclad prenup! ☺️
@@jcnlaw Well - you know a lot of immoral women. And men. I have no problem with the advice not to marry. I do have the problem suggesting men cohabitate for the benefits of marriage without the marriage. Seems to encourage selfishness when a pre-nup would take care of the "what if" question.
All I know is that our paths in this life are different. Even through tough situations, we still learn something about ourselves, our lives, and life in general. We need to choose what is best for us without being afraid to do certain things just because they did not work out for others. What would be the point of being alive if we can't live?
Very good advice! I think people make a mistake when they confuse spirituality/commitment with government involvement/mandates! Don't do something that can ultimately hurt you and possibly cost you your life savings and children's inheritance!
Marriage is about routine. Men do it for the access to regular physical affection. No man is going to just have a BF/GF relationship and the woman cuts off the physical and that man stays unless that woman was a Sugar mama to him. Then he will just cheat anyways.
@@mondoenterprises6710 We’ve been together 30 years. We still do everything together, but she is pretty busy. I have a good salary too, so its not money that keeps us together.
@@NeverTakeNoCut-offs Good to hear. If I was a 38 yo man CEO I would probably not want to be with a 62 yo woman. It would have to be an extraordinary situation. I'd be very insecure about it. It must be an incredible rare connection. It does seem bizarre unless your Trump Mick or Rupert. Good for you.
That someone must have had an empty soul, sadly enough. If you first establish a sincere, spiritual relationship with God, then you will find a partner who feels the same. Only then will you be able to have a successful and long lasting marriage. Your mutually spiritual relationship with the Lord, who considers you as "one" after marriage, will forever be the "glue" that maintains your marriage through thick or thin.
Excuse me sir, sexual immorality is a sin...we are not DOGS or animals...but, yes, what woman wants sex after fifty...you are correct...I do not want a dirty bed to constantly cause more laundry...not to mention all the other cleaning up after, that a man requires...they can live like DOGS alone...I am fine...no more yeast infections either...I can get my rest, finally...
Thank you very much for watching and commenting! I welcome all points of view, even if you may not agree with the message in this video. Many women want great sex and loving companionship after 50. Even most dogs love companionship. Thanks again for watching and joining the conversation!
I'm 47 and in a good LTR for the last 10 years. If I become single again I would not cohabitate with a woman ever again. You can't afford palimony or divorce after 40.
I know about two older men that got into long term FWB relationships with women. Each person had their own place and never lived together with their female companions. One eventually split up. Other had his FWB companion until he died this year. He even included her in his will.
When a man who makes money from your misery tries to help you avoid that misery....you best be listening.
He has no imagination.
Who says you’ve to live together after marriage?
Who says you’ve to marry for love
Marriage is a legal contract and laws favor marriage.
He also forgot there’s something called marriage agreement.
One can marry someone to get tax breaks, shared health benefits, residency somewhere, pension once one dies, …
People really think only inside a tiny box in this thread!
Who says marriage has anything to do with live! It’s a legal convenience…
And why don’t people talk! Why don’t people figure these details of doing what we want prior to getting together!
This thread shows how little people learn in life! Negative & misogynistic.
I identify as misogynist , racist and anti-Semite. I can recommend, it keeps you out of a lot of trouble.
People still think marriage is love and security that the other person will take care of you 😢
That's the whole point... he is a man. Men, by nature, are out for themselves.
I got cheated, stolen and divorced at 39 and decided to follow 50+ channels like this and thoroughly read the comments to learn from older men and try to salvage the second half of my life. Thanks to all seniors that spread this vital life knowledge.
Become wiser no bitter …
Happened here too, you're not alone
It happened to me too. I have become almost blackpilled. I am not angry, just much more aware of the BS.
@@Ascerian been there a time or 2.... Married to Jesus, he never changes!!!
Sorry bro!
It might turned out better the second time around.
Not all hero’s wear capes. This man is saving peoples lives.
@@vink1547 Thank you!
The exact opposite.
"Heroes".
@@jcnlawWhat’s your view of a prenuptial agreement ?
@ Great question! I have made and uploaded several videos about prenuptial agreements. A prenup is only as good as its ability to be upheld in court. I definitely recommend consulting with an experienced family law attorney in your specific jurisdiction to take a deep dive into whether a prenup makes sense on your particular situation. Many jurisdictions are not “prenup friendly”, while other jurisdictions are more “prenup friendly”. Also - do not write your own prenup. Have an experienced family law attorney do it.
There’s people on the prowl looking for a retirement plan because they didn’t think ahead. Stay single gentlemen and ladies that did think ahead
Exactly what my ex did. She thought she had found the gold with hubby 2, but he was a grifter with nothing but a rented lake house. She found a very good retirement plan with #3 since he was already retired with a good AT&T pension. She is now the pensioner's #5 wife. Best part about it: I never hear a peep from her.
Women are financial predators. We need to start calling them on it. It is what the overwhelming majority of women are -- financial predators.
People? You mean women? 😂
@@darbyohara Better known as financial predators.
Completely agree with this.
😊 I'm so glad that both my father and my husband never took this advice! My father enjoyed 13 years of a very happy marriage (until his death) after marrying at age 60. My husband and I married when he was 50 and we just happily celebrated our 26th wedding anniversary. Most of my life I've ignored similar advice and I'm so much better off for it. There are many, happy marriages after age 50.
@@tinalewis6782 Thanks for watching and joining the conversation! I’m happy to hear about your father and husband. Everyone and every relationship is different. Glad things worked out for you and your father!
@tinalewis. if everyone's belief on marriages is like a total struggle, then most people will get it. I am glad you had a stronghold that life is better shared with another person🥰, and it will make you happy, you certainly got and EXPERIENCED WHAT YOU BELIEVE. ❤
Why not have a prenumptial agreement then? I was married to an abusive man that made triple my salary, I told his lawyer, I have my dignity, and didn't want a single dime from him! I wasn't raised to be a gold digger. The lawyer was quite shocked because he was accustomed to dealing with unscrupulous people.
A friend got remarried in her 50s to a guy that seemed iffy at best. It lasted about 15 years. She'd worked all of her life and had a significant wad built up. He had nothing and got half. Don't know how anyone could trust enough to marry.
But it is the men who are at risk, except in the very rare circumstances when women have more money than the man.
I was going to get remarried, but I bought an incontinent rabid hyena as a pet instead. Much more sensible!
yeah, I'm a fan of frothing feces, strewn across my home, as well...
Cleaner and safer with hyena
Hilarious! Thanks for the laugh.
Are you talking about Kamala Harris?
Vote for Trump.
a wise man once said, if you ever get tired of being happy get married.
@@CalvinMorris-cf8jk Omg! 😂😂😂
@@CalvinMorris-cf8jk that wise man was a woman
@@CalvinMorris-cf8jk 29 years and prenup is best and marriage is wonderful for many of my friends. It’s helpful in times of medical issues and yes you can get a will but who tells the doctors and them this??? I’ll get married again
@@CalvinMorris-cf8jk 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
@@CalvinMorris-cf8jk 💯
Married briefly twice. Supported two husbands. Haven’t even been for coffee with a guy in 19 years. (I always wonder why ,I’m average) Will never ever marry again. Will never live with a man again. I’d like some male friends (I have two now) who live nearby. All my life I loved being an introvert and being alone. Now I have more confidence and am less shy would like some more friendships to do things. I do everything alone. But it is what it is and I’ve been blessed to inherit enough money to buy a house and care for myself as I age. What we don’t have in one area of our lives we often receive in another. I’m very grateful.
I am 55, never married, no kids, zero debt, own my house and will never let go of my happy, single life of freedom.
Hear, hear
I just turned 55, divorced 1 month before my birthday. It's not the first, but it will be the last. My ex-husband used me financially until I put a stop to it and then he wanted to divorce. I don't make enough money to be the only income. I have two children from a previous marriage. Raising kids is not all ponies and rainbows. Good for you for not making the same mistakes I did!
@@TracyH29 I am so sorry you have gone through so much. I hope things get better for you! ♥
@@michelelee9824Thank you😊
You go boy, I am right there behind you after getting my first divorce in my early 30's and now like you, I am debt free, house is paid for and I am loving being free to do what I want when I want without having to justify it to someone else!
I got divorced in 2017 at the age of 57. I’ve lived alone ever since. Not in a relationship and not looking for one. My life is better now than it ever was when I was married.
If you are like me, you get the same amount of sex you got in marriage living alone and not dating without all the attitude.
@@MikeS-7 actually, I get more s3x now, as a single male, than I ever did married. Tons of travel, playing, motorcycles, mtn bikes, and adventures. Marriage is for IDIOTS
@ That is correct.
I'm 33 & single. I get more sex than all my newly married friends.
SAME here... Loneliness is bullshit ! Tranquility and not being NAGGED is PRICELESS 🥳🎊
We’re happily married and got married after 50. Marriage is more than a good relationship. It’s about creating a family and more importantly it’s about both people being committed to having each other’s back.
Great comment! Exactly!
I agree ❤
My sentiments exactly 💯❤... you can meet the love 💕 of your life at any age...yes even after 50! The problem is people have just become too greedy.... it's all about possessions and money 🤑💰. VERY few care about the good old fashioned love 💕 companionship, having a best friend, having a travel 🧳 mate, ETC. Life 🧬 is about people and love and intimacy......just pray 🙏 and hope against hope that you meet a mirror image of yourself: kind, caring, loving, real and humane human being 🤞🤞🤞🤞
In theory, you are right, in reality not so much,
Absolutely!!
Saw something funny the other day…
“Can a woman make you a millionaire?” “Sure if you’re a billionaire.”
Take my wife...please.
@@georgeburns8447Rodney Dangerfield! Love it! Still rings true today maybe even more so lol
Made me chuckle
Slam on the brakes, and think rationally my brothers. Big head versus small head!!!
@@benjamindover5355 Hey Ben will always remember.
I am in my early 60s, divorced 8 years ago - I feel lonely from time to time. I occasionally date for female company - but to be honest I love being able to do what I want when I want. There are not compromises, no hassles, no arguments…I love the freedom.
@@betteralone318 call/see your family, friends. Find sone hobbies. Travel. So many things to do when you are single.
@@betteralone318 You’re happy because you have found women that will sleep with you.
You can marry totally out of convenience.
It’s a legal contract it’s not an emotional contract.
All laws favor marriage, it doesn’t mean your to live together!
This lawyer has no imagination!
And apparently many others don’t.
@ here in New Zealand you certainly don’t need to live together nor married. The laws apply if any reasonable person would consider you like a married couple
@@maluribeiro68A marriage is the worst legal contract a man could ever sign
Don’t want to be his nurse or his maid! Thank you!
Don't want to be a sugar daddy or support a freeloader.
@ I make a quarter of a million a year and own my own house, so yeah, you’re speaking to the wrong person!
@@Lillyofthevalley222
It sounds like you’ve become the man you always wanted to marry.
Well done.
@ I married a lazy idiot! He came after me for spousal support during the divorce and he got NOTHING! 🤣
All you men are the same! You act like you’re providers but most of you are lazy and incompetent and incapable!
@ making money and owning a home isn’t an exclusive ability that only a man is capable of. My ex lives with his mom in a house with her… when men have no idea how to take up the space they are meant to occupy women are quite capable of filling that space as well as holding their own space. This is an adaptability trait that men don’t seem to be able to possess. If you really think being a man comes down to making a good income and owning a house then men really aren’t much!
Maybe create a better definition of yourself and work towards achieving that.
For me, the biggest insult would be to the children who now have to look forward to an inheritance dispute with people they never knew growing up.
That's a good point.
@@Conan_the_Based …I love my children. But if a wife makes it to the end with her husband, and hopefully she’s not the one who killed him, she should definitely have something coming her way too.
That's a very good point! Didn't think of that one!
@@Conan_the_Based very true
@@Conan_the_Based another insult is a con-man posing as a friend/bus. associate to your retired parents, until almost all of their savings are gone. No inheritance to look forward to either
when the guy, who gets paid for you making mistake A, tells you NOT to make mistake A, you need to listen...
If you can get to 50 without being married … why spoil a perfect record?
@@penguinvic9892 My thoughts exactly!
I’m 58 and still a bachelor!👍🏼💪🏼🇺🇸
@@Albert-777 71 years still single.
@ Good job,Linda 👍🏼💪🏼
I married for the first time at 50 and it's the best experience in general, but more importantly, it's spiritually more rewarding than what I could ever have imagined. I guess mine is successful because I took my time to find someone who recognizes the importance of the spiritual aspects of marriage and is capable of spiritual beliefs. That's the secret "glue" to a successful marriage that lasts even now in our old age.
I had a boyfriend in his 50’s that didn’t want to marry me. He just wanted to live together. I said no. Everyone should decide what the best course of action is for their happiness.
@@Mitzi73 Why was marriage so important to you? I agree that everyone should decide what is best for their own happiness. Can you be happy without being married?
@@Mitzi73 so mean - and all he wanted was free sex food and homely comforts without commitment
@@CarolFremel-my4hs You're delusional most women today hardly bring anything to the table
@@CarolFremel-my4hs why do you assume he wasn't gonna pay for anything? There is nothing about that in the original comment
@@CarolFremel-my4hswho else could he possibly be committed to while they are co-habitating. He wanted commitment without bringing the state into it. The contract was more important than commitment apparently. He clearly doesn’t wNt to he anyones retirement plan. Assuming the worst of his character for that is quite telling and makes one seem bitter.
I can’t imagine going through the misery again; once is plenty!
@@David-wo9un I totally agree with you.
*"You can still have terrific, intimate, great relationships at **_any_** age **_without bringing State Law into your life and finances."_* 🏆
But that's not what women ultimately want.
@@Last_one_before_I_go Then start crackin' that piggy-bank _wiiiiiide_ open.
@@mulemule - I was married over 27 years, single now 14. There's no chance my piggy bank will fall victim to another marriage.
@@Last_one_before_I_go Excellent. (Then you've already solved the "But that's not what women want" dilemma.)
facts!
I’m 75 & I couldn’t agree with you more. Something I’ve observed in life, is that many people don’t know how to entertain themselves. Get a hobby, find an interest. Either one of these will provide the opportunity to meet other interesting people. The intellectual pursuit stimulates the brain and provides hours of pleasurable activity. What you perceive as loneliness is perhaps your brain spinning its wheels without gaining any traction. Find something to do.
That is so true. I've noticed it too.
My relationship with a gentleman felt smothering. After I broke up with him I took up ham radio, do community volunteering, learned the piano, play my flute, and have a room full of my artwork. All this after 2 years and age 60. Now I have a companion. A fun fellow who also enjoys as much space as me.
My relationship with a gentleman felt smothering. After I broke up with him I took up ham radio, do community volunteering, learned the piano, play my flute, and have a room full of my artwork. All this after 2 years at age 60. Now I have a companion. A fun fellow who also enjoys as much space as me.
I'm 55 and never been married, no kids, but I always wanted that. But most of my friends, family, co-workers, church members, etc have had nasty divorces with lost kids, finances and emotional distress. Then most of the couples who have stayed with their spouses are not happy at all and constantly argue and cheat. Now one of them is now taking care of her demented husband that she never liked. So I think my life turned out ok.
I’m almost 50 and same-never been married and no kids (never wanted them). I have only seen a handful of “successful” marriages compared to the HIGH number of dumpster fires you have described. 😬
I’d like companionship, but my solitude is just fine and actually very enjoyable!
@jdh1969 you left out the people who are happily married with or without children. I wonder why?
PS There’s no need to compare yourself with others
@@jdh1969 Same exact situation for me. Over 60 now. Everyone says, "why is a nice, attractive woman like you alone?" I say, "Better alone than in bad company."
I absolutely don't know anyone - male or female - who is happy in their marriage. And the majority - though not all - have big problems with their kids.
Why bother?
Lolzzzz @ "demented husband that she never liked".
@jdh1969
Takes guts and character to look after a disabled relative and stick to them . There's tension in any relationship.
I wish someone had given my grandma this advice. She was widowed at 54 when my grandfather died. She got married twice more. Second husband turned out to be an abusive gold digger. Third husband turned out to be an ornery old coot who expected to be waited upon hand & foot. After those two messy and expensive divorces, grandma finally learned not to fall for men’s false charms. She embraced the single life and lived out the last two decades of her life in peace before passing away at the age of 92.
Good that she had the last 20 yrs to live a peaceful life
As a retired (and widowed) attorney, I stood up and applauded this very sage advice! There’s not a snowball’s chance in he!! That I would remarry now. As a woman, I and thoroughly enjoying my solitude; it’s the first time I am responsible to and for me and me alone and I am loving it. I understand that some would not( mostly men, as they seem to be incapable of making a box of Mac and cheese) but people *listen* to this man’s advice. Do Not get remarried- shack up if you want constant companionship, but remarriages end in divorce much more often than first marriages. Listen to the man - he knows whereof he speaks.
@@kimkats Thank you for watching and commenting! Happy to have you as part of my TH-cam community!
A perfect marriage or relationship is an illusion; there's no universal playbook for making them work. What's effective for one couple may not apply to another. Nevertheless, I've come to understand that there's always a solution to be found. Half a decade ago, my wife and I faced such trials in our marriage that divorce seemed inevitable. Yet, through perseverance and determination, we navigated through the rough waters and emerged stronger, reunited, and more resilient
There is a lot of sense in what you just said and I hope mine works the same way too, we are currently separated but I cant live without her, I love her so much. wish I can get her back I can do anything to have her back, we have tried therapy amongst other things
This is helpful, I will look her up online right now...Thanks.
You wont regret it
Do not remarry if you get divorced, especially if you are a man.
Don’t do it.
And, here I thought these scam bots only trolled financial videos.
Marriage after 50 is a TERRIBLE idea. No benefit and the legal liability to your spouse is huge. Don't like giving away half your stuff and making monthly payment to your ex instead of keeping everything for yourself? Don't get married. If he/she insists, run like hell. The chance of a second or third marriage failing is much higher than the first one.
I think someone could still get married after fifty… if one is worried about financial assets, have a prenuptial agreement signed. Wouldn’t that work to one’s advantage?
I married at 36 and lost her to cancer 26 years later. Before dying she told me to never remarry. Though I had never said it to her I knew a long time ago that I wouldn't.
@bphennesy Why would anyone say something like that? Sorry, but that is selfish. When you're gone, you're gone. The partner needs to move on and be happy.
@@bphennesy I lost my spouse to cancer after 30 years of marriage. We owned an insurance company and believed in life insurance. Before he died he said you should get married if you want to, but with the eight figure life insurance policy he left me, no way am I going to fund a great life style for a grifter, loser or user. I am perfectly happy doing what ever I want, whenever I want, trying to have my last check bounce and will leave whatever is left to my children. No, prenups don’t work as great as people think. Ask my brother. I live in community property state.
I lost my wife to AIDS and she got me to move on and remarry
@@cgschow1971I agree that is pretty messed up thing to say especially knowing you are going to die soon and it won’t matter to you anyway. It sounds so delusional.
It’s scary out there after 50. My ex married last year and the new wife has total control of his finances now and has taken his children out of his will! She has total control of who he talks to, so no family connection. Young woman are in for the money dear man.
The problem is a lot of non- promiscuous women will only sleep with a man who is their husband. So if they want a woman like that for a companion in life, they have to commit. Even if they are widows or divorced, they don't like the idea of sleeping around. So that's one factor.
@@elainer8288 Thanks for watching and commenting. A man can still commit without getting married and bringing state law into his life and finances in the event the marriage ends before death of one of the parties. I’m absolutely fine with commitment. It is marriage under state law that is a problem. Some of the best, most loving relationships I have seen are two people who are committed to each other, but not married.
Let's keep it 💯, there are very few such women.😂😂😂
@@kjhnsn7296 Don't get out much, do ya friend?
If two people get married, they become family and are commited to having each other's back. They are fully commited to protecting you, and you fully commited to protecting them. You know you have each other's back. It's a full commitment with actions that speak a lot louder than words. It's not the same thing.
@kjhnsn I meant to say a lot of women don't want to sleep around. If physical intimacy is not part of a serious relationship, they prefer to be alone and celibate. Very common for women to make this choice.
I'm over 50, never feel lonely, have a great relationship, and have no intention of marrying ever. All it took was filling out the adoption papers at the city's Animal Control office.
Loneliness is about the worst reason to get married.
It's hard to be lonely when you are busy
Well… I am 55 years old and got married for the first and last time at age 50. I was a bachelor most of my life and sincerely appreciate the so called “ball and chain.” Had I known marriage was this good, I would’ve gotten married 20 years ago. 😊
@@WeeWeeIII I’m happy for you! Thank you for watching and sharing your experience!
@@WeeWeeIII Sure, sure, but you preferred to avoid comittment and change and use women during your young years. Older players always settle down sooner or later.
@@Anna-fm7hh I didn't "use" women. There were no victims only volunteers respectfully. Additionally, I did not want to marry until I was ready. I love women and respect women 100%. I was raised by women (the men were cowards in my family). Perhaps, you are judging me harshly without knowing my situation. I understand. "To Thine Own Self Be True."
@@WeeWeeIII are you sure you are different from the men in your family? Doesn’t seem so.
💝!
I have a wonderful marriage of 31 years tomorrow December 4th. If I become single I will never remarry. I’ve seen a lot of vultures circling others who have become single. They were looking for a roof over their head and someone to look after them. No Thankyou.
@@pamfullerton5334 Hi Pam. Thanks for watching and sharing your thoughts. Happy to have you as part of my TH-cam community!
My husband and I got married at 53 ( me) and 68 (him) and we have been married for 7 years. I am divorced after a 31 year marriage and he was never before married. My family loves him and he knows it. His family hates me and so do many of his friends ...and I know it! Still it is a loving union and we renew our vows every year. I have never been happier in my life and it is true for him too! I would lay down my life for this wonderful man !
In my own situation and how I cope....I don't mind being disliked by miscreants. Often when you enter a person's life when they are older...their people are not going to like the change. It's their problem...the first task is to dismiss destructive people from either side. The most important task is to pray together. People who love you will love that you are happy and cared with deep commitment... for and people who don't like it...they probably never loved you. They had other motivations that have been displaced by the marriage...and the displacement of their interest is why they don't like the person with whom you share commitment.
Very wise words indeed, glad that your union is a happy one.
@@lynnehood2198 Great comment!
These advices are welcome but each person is different from the other. Just don't be dumb and use your experience to identify a good partner.
I've got married at age og 59 yo with a adorable widow woman who had 2 kids. After 15 years together, I'm still happy. It was the best thing I've done in my life. I finally found my soulmate and loving children, now adults. And love and respect surrounds us all the time. I wish to all my friends to have the same. But I'm sure it's not simple. Just don't be stupid.
After the end of my marriage of 22 years, I felt that loneliness and sought out companionship and yes remarried after just 2 years. Thankfully a pre nup saved me after a year of marriage and the 3 of us, (her adult son was living at home) went our separate ways without a significant loss of my assets. I doubt I will ever marry again, too much risk if it doesn't work out. Bought my first new car last month without having justifying it to anyone. Felt empowered, like I was 18 again! Great advice!
Came here because my widowed Dad is contemplating a second marriage because he is so lonely. The woman he is dating is someone he met at church and my Dad would never live with a her without marriage - he is too honorable. My sense is that a pre-nup is a good idea for him and will talk with him about it, and possibly about putting his house into a trust since it came through my mother and her parents, while recognizing a second wife would have impact on his retirement assets. Those are his to spend as he chooses. My Dad would want to see her taken care of, which we kids would honor. After seeing all the negative comments from men on this channel and the content itself, I have even more regard for my husband who is honorable like my Dad. We are 28 years strong with a grandchild on the way - a blessing to see a new generation. If I lost my husband, I doubt I'd remarry. The chance of finding another honorable man is so low, and I am both independent and comfortable alone. Very glad God made me that way since most women spend their final years living alone, but more especially because I know I found a rare one.
I'm not meaning to be rude but you can not call yourself independent and comfortable alone because you aren't either of those if you are married and have been for that many years.
@@TracyH29 You are incorrect and I don't particularly care what you think is not possible.
marriage is for kids if you cant have a family there is no reason for marriage
Marriage is for women. If it was for kids then they wouldn't be able to file for divorce while yall have kids. Stop falling for the trap. She will get child support and alimony and your house and your pension, and your 401k instead of just child support. Stop sending our fellow men to the slaughter house with that get married for kids trick
@@chriskroenung4825 you can still have kids without getting married
@@lukevo6485 so what is your point I never said you had to get married to have kids I just said that is the only reason to get married
@@lukevo6485 in our depraved age that is common, but children deserve a married father and mother.
You forgot to warn people about those states where cohabitation creates a presumption of marriage. 'Gubbmint' can just come in and decide FOR YOU that you're already married, even without any ceremony or license.
Never allow one to move in and start using your address! You could easily find your butt homeless and living in a cardboard box under the highway overpass.
Or get married with all the proper paperwork to make a prenuptial agreement stick. Is there any reason a contract couldn't be written that you can not be considered common law married? How does this even work if you have a same sex roommate for long enough couldn't this nowadays be considered common law marriage? 😂😂 my aunt and mom have lived together 6 years 😂
Yes, here in Aus you have to be bloody careful about that.
It will happens only if you take advice from President Dick.@@petrakperkins
Yup. And quietly changing the timeframe. Surprise! And if she has kids, they are more and more saying you have to continue supporting them.
This guy is spot on!! The is absolutely NO REASON to involve the STATE in a relationship!!!!
59 and a forever bachelor. Watched all of my buddy's get divorce raped. Hit the gym this a.m. and walked 18 later. Marriage is a Business Plan......for women. Timmy C Arizona
It's brutal. Never again. I had a woman tell me, trying to be helpful, that I can always earn more money. How about I keep what I earned instead of some gender biased court legally thefting it. She can earn the money. I already earned it and watch it get legally thefted. Never again.
I was 31 when I realized that marriage would never be a thing for me. As the years rolled on the realization that I made the right decision strengthened. What was practical in time's past hasn't been for decades now.
totally agree bro.
I'm 60 and the same. My girlfriend lives 20 km from me and I like it that way.
You sir, are my hero! 53 here never married and want no part of it. "The juice is not worth the squeeze."
Turning 50 in January, never married, no kids…. And the way the world had become very happy about this. I don’t nock marriage, BUT…. Think 90% get married under wrong preconceived ideas.
Was it worth it? Making the choice seeing everyone else pair up, but being free to pursue any and all ambitions I 35 male, spend my days doing psychology working out or learning karate I'm kinda stuck on this road, divorce is terrifying
You're right regarding the way the world is now - spiritually unaware and without a relationship with God. Marriage was intended to be successful because two people believe in the spiritual importance of marriage. Without that spiritual "glue" holding together the infrastructure that is marriage, it stands an empty chance of surviving. One must have a strong spiritual relationship with God in order to find a partner who feels the same for a marriage to endure the hardships that are inevitable in life. If you do establish a relationship with God, and then have a spiritual understanding to find a partner with the same beliefs, it is so worth it! The best experience in this life!
@@williambowes-xt2smFind the right one by putting yourself out there……. 35 is a Great age
"Marriage is an institution. Have you ever been in an institution?"
@@jarrodanderson2124 that is brilliant
that is brilliant.
Have a girlfriend and stay single and when the crazy starts you go home and she goes home.
Not an if, but when.
Agree 100% dont even cohabitate.
@@WahiniesI agree on that one. Don't let her move in with you.
I'm 57, never married and the above theory works quite well......
@@charliehargrave7458 Exactly!
Family Court is a Multibillion dollar industry. Everyone making money off the working man. Don’t play into that game.
It really is, the creation of family court is/was suppose to protect broken families, it did the quite opposite.
@@morotetsuke can you imagine the money lawyers are making…siphoning off your assets 🤦♂️
@@morotetsuke If men continue to avoid or dodge marriage, the State will find another way.
That's why there is Common Law wife.
The State cannot afford to let men get put of their grip. They've done it for a while and see how men voted for Trump.
@@tropics8407 🤣
Wow, America is just so broken. Life is more than money and power....
This brother out here saving lives and sanity at the same damn time. 💯 Cheers bro.
I agree! I never married - didn't want to baby sit a grown man.
Yes. Men talk about how women are the ones who benefit from marriage, but it's often the women who do the lion's share of the housework and end up having to babysit/micromanage a grown man.
@Ava2969ny Bingo!
@@Ava2969nyand women end up with health issues - then getting dumped
😂😂😂😂
@@suebotchie4167 having a job with a boss is enough for me
Excellent advice! After my husband passes, I will never remarry and the house, cars, and money will be all mine! They will never get shared with anyone.
Wow. That doesn't sound materialistic at all.
Exactly. You don't have to marry them.
Thanks for this video. I appreciate the time that went into making it. I'm a 56 year old woman - single, never married, no children. Marriage really is a contract between two people and the state. Unfortunately, past a certain age, some people are approaching you because they want something, not because they like you or are interested in forming a relationship with you. Also, past the age of 50, people have already accumulated assets (if they've worked hard and/or are fortunate), they usually have children, and they usually have established lives. There can also be a certain amount of bitterness within a person if a previous marriage or two has not worked out. For all these reasons, getting married and co-mingling assets is far more complicated. I don't believe I'll ever marry although I wouldn't necessarily rule it out. I worked in U.S. healthcare for 20 years and I think the only possible reason to get married is if you have a long term partner and you don't want issues to pop up at the end of life, although I'm sure these issues can also be handled with a good attorney. In the U.S., having healthcare is another reason people get married. I've known long term partners who didn't want to involve the state but got married so one of them could acquire healthcare benefits.
Sound advice !
64 now divorced 16 years ago , still haven't recovered 😮
Sorry to hear that, I hope you get there one step at a time.
I think after mid-life and average wealth (100k to 3 mil), low chance of recovery.
If a guy wants to get married, do it extra early. If it works, great. If not, very little lost . . . with a lot of wisdom gained.
@@kwaichangcaine8234 I spent over 3 times the length of my last marriage paying off the debt incurred.
@@mgtowski395 exactly most men who are divorced by their wife end up ruined permanently or closed to destroyed. Yet sadly millions of young men still fall for marriage to western value raised women of all races, religious and countries all over.
I feel your pain. Two weeks after 'celebrating' our 30th wedding anniversary (I was in my mid 50's) I found out she had been cheating on me. Told me she didn't need me anymore so I had to start from scratch while her life carried on. Now the only female I trust is my dog. Thirty. Damn. Years!
I’m an average 70 y/o guy. Got married for the first and only time at age 59. Why? Because I lost my job due to corporate downsizing and I needed the health insurance that my then girlfriend (soon to be wife) job provided. We’re still going strong years later. So, it can work!
P.S. NO KIDS!
@@doctorskull8197 Love at first copay...how romantic. 🙄
@@GIRLINA101 hilarious 🤣
Don’t bother doctors and nurses. They were kids once.
The only reason you should get married is if you want to raise a family. At 56, I will not be starting to raise a family. That ship sailed many years ago. I am going to work, invest, and retire on my own terms.
After a 14-year marriage that ended because she wanted to be with my best friend of the time, I do not have time for these games in my future.
I'm 55, been married twice. I have been single for over 22 years and my life has never been better. I will never get married again.
@@RunsWithKnives So you split your stuff twice.Philantropist times two.
I got lucky. I drank the kool aid about supporting your wife in all things. Put her through college. She started making ridiculous money and had the affair etc. so I don’t have to pay alimony because she made more. Caught her hiding some small assets so I got to keep the house which skyrocketed 5 times what I paid for it in equity. And the kids child support was negligible.
I know other guys sleeping on their moms couch at 55/60 paying mortgages and alimony for ex wives who’s live in lovers now have their feet up on their couch watching their tvs. Barely making enough to cover has to get to work.
You lucked out by not being in California 😅
@@benjamindover5355 Need to hire a homeless guy who has a gas can...
Yup
I’ve heard horror stories about California.
Could be worse. At least she got a decent job. The usual story is the guy pays for her Masters degree in some useless field than decides to become a housewife THAN she ends up screwing around on you while you are at work slaving away.
Marriage: quickly becoming obsolete.
Excellent. It's about time the feudalism tradition ended
Marriage used to be a good deal for both parties. Now, not so much.
Becoming?
I'd sure like to think or "believe" it's becoming obsolete!
@carllelendt5452
*Women* are obsolete. I mean literally, think about it: if they don't work, cook, clean, sew, shop, maintain the house or fork, then I ask you: what ARE they good for?
Im 41 and never been married, and never will. I was told one time if jumping out of a plane with a parachute had over a 50% failure rate like marriages do, then why would you ever do it? Good point
From a woman’s perspective, marrying a guy over 50 who likely has an ex wife and kids to deal with would just be an absolute NO. They typically have zero boundaries and want to be the “Disneyland Dad” it’s just too messy. Ladies…make your own money and live your own life. You’ll live much longer 😂
Single women live longer. Single men, not so much. 😂
Fornication is the proposal then? A tough decision for a religious person.
A cold bucket of reality from someone who has seen it all. At 54, I don’t have the time or energy to go through another one.
Good call - thanks for posting your public service announcement! Wish there was more advice around like that from combat hardened vets like yourself!
Jonathan Noble I really admire your honesty even when it might sound counterintuitive, no other lawyer cares this much for people, thank you SO MUCH for all these videos. God bless you ❤❤ I'd like you make a video about cohabitation. Greetings from Argentina (South America)
South America in brackets ! LOL we know where Argentina is pal
@@dorsetone8142 you sound like your ex ran off with an Argentinian 😆
Best video on TH-cam. It convinced me not to do it. Well unless she is wealthy. Because if she marries me it’s not for my money.
I'm 56, twice divorced, going through child support payments for the 2nd time in my life...for adopted kids. I'll be paying until I'm 66. Only 7 years of my adult life with no child support.
I do admire you for that. But that is tough. Hopefully they realize you did them a solid.
She found the beta provider.
For adopted kids....SMH
men it's NOT called midlife crisis, it's called midlife CLARITY
@@rod1147 🎊🎉🎉🎉
I am 67 and never been married with no kids. There was no mention of the "never-marrieds". I wanted to be married for the longest time in my life but it never happened. And now I have given up completely and feel alright about it. I guess a good part of the reason why I feel like I don't need to get a woman for love is because I've some hormonal treatments due to prostate cancer I had.
I know of some guys around my age who have never been married. They still hope to get married. All those whom I've known over 40 and got married for the first time always ended in disaster. With the never-marrieds, if you over 40 and end up with someone who's been married before, that would be a bigger disaster than if you ended up with someone never-married.
Odds are you and your never-married friends have bigger than average bank accounts! $$$$!
I got remarried at 56 following the death of my wife. I got a prenup agreement about how to divide property, particularly my property, in event of a divorce. Darn glad I did as it actually stopped her from following through on several divorce threats over the last 25 years. She realized she would end up broke.
I am in my 50's and happily married to someone who is my best friend. We've been married for nearly 30 years. If something were to happen to my spouse or the marriage, I think that I would want to remarry, but after watching Later Daters on Netflix, I don't know how likely it would be. The show opened my eyes to how difficult it is for people in their 50's and 60's to date, even when both parties are interested in marriage, because of how rigid most people are at that stage in their lives and because of the baggage most people bring into their relationships. It's a miracle that people in their 50's, 60's or 70's are able to find love at all! I would definitely bring up a prenup and not remarry without one.
First of all congratulations on your happy marriage. You have a point with a whole pre-nup idea but, if someone brings up a pre-nup it's like he or she is already planning the divorce ahead of the marriage, (this was said by a famous divorce attorney who's name escapes me). I believe that people need to thread carefully when marrying at any age and pay attention to how someone acts in various situations. Generally speaking people will reveal themselves one way or the other. The true test is will we pay attention to reality or get swept up in emotion?
Some people are only looking for a Nurse or a Purse.
Let's not forget all the unpaid domestic labor men enjoy, either.
A-ha-ha - this made me laugh.
I would ask the same question. Why do people feel they need to get married after fifty? Well, money is usually involved.
The state should have nothing to do with marriage........it should just be a religious matter. Licensing leads to complications.
Thank you! This is such valuable information and I totally agree. I've already been married and have no desire to do it again. I date but I keep my own home. At 50+ it can be very difficult to loose half your savings due to another divorce, as there is not enough time to recoup your losses. Id rather travel, hang out with friends and enjoy my own space.
Ladies - Never get Hitched. Stay single. Stay childfree. I retired at 49 with lots of hard-earned money that I earned. Enjoy life.
Yes, ladies stay single, childless and have a lot of casual sex. You will make many men happy.
And who will wipe your ass in not much time? Who will treat you? For now, doctors and nurses are humans that means - they had to be children. If you are not some kind of a great artist or scientist you will be profiting from other women’s efforts. Other women who can’t retire at 49 bc they raised children - what impaired their career and their income - who will sooner than later take care of your smart ass. And also I am very curious how much your assets will be worth in the world without children or rather - when next generation will be 1/2 or 1/3 of yours? Maybe they will think - if you don’t have children we don’t give a fuck about you. There are not many of us and we don’t want to take care of you. We have our own parents and grandparents- people live long nowadays- to provide for. We don’t want our money to be used for smart asses who had fun when our parents were struggling.
@@zumurudlilit "Take care of me"? 'wipe your ass"? Your vulgarity is typical of younger people nowadays sadly. I would certainly not accept 'help' of any kind as my grandmothers before me. I take care of myself like they did. I had to retire early to take care of my mother who had Alzheimers. I was blessed by God to be able to do that for her. It was many years out of my career and set me back quite a bit but I was ready for it. I would never send my parents to a home. Never. Yet the homes are filled with soggy-diapered seniors. It is an epidemic. It disgusts me. So stop being a smart ass and go to work as I did.
Sage advice. Many freeloaders out there. Plus can get stuck taking care of someone.
I'm 50, divorced in 2012. I'm not going to risk my military retirement and VA benefits. I take trips and have a beach house in Philippines.
Great advice, having a blended family with your kids and grandkids and their kids and grandkids rarely goes over well. Tying up your assets with another person at this stage of your life is very risky business, emotions tend to take over rather than common sense. Health issues are another huge red flag, you could end up spending your life’s savings providing care for your new spouse and then the security for your old age no longer exists.
I just overheard a discussion between a couple of Middle Aged men yesterday. One man was telling the other, “ yeah.. I don’t really like where I live anymore. I’m thinking if a met someone, we could go in together on a house… I’m thinking about something in the $800k range which I could afford on my own, I just don’t want to tap in to my retirement” …. Women beware
Marriage is like a tornado. Lots of blowing at first and then the house is gone.
@@bradgraystock5966 Thanks for the levity 🙏🏻
@@bradgraystock5966 😂
As a divorce attorney, you come off as quite jaded and I presume that is because that is what you see all the time. There is a lot of good with a formal bond and certainly a commitment that people are making to each other they will not just cut loose when times get a little bumpy. It is a union among family, friends, state and for those who believe with God as well. After 50 both parties are old enough and experienced enough to know what they want or don't want. If one party happens to pass away to to health or accident, does your advise still stand for the other not to get remarried? I think you should re-think your message and the negative vibes it sends. People are very lucky if they found love once and to find it a second time a real blessing. Life is not about the accumulation of material things but of relationships and bonds and commitments. You cannot take your wealth with you when you die but you can leave behind that memory that you are too jaded, too scared or too selfish to re-commit to someone very special in your life.
@@Robert8455 Thank you for watching and commenting! I appreciate all comments, not only comments that agree with the message in my videos. The problem I have with marriage after 50 for most people is the awful divorce process if the marriage becomes non-functioning. I am all for a committed loving relationship for all adults. This can be accomplished without bringing state (divorce) laws into one’s life and finances. I’m not jaded. Just practical. Thank you again for watching and joining the discussion!
Most women will still insist on the ring! Especially in the more mature age group. They were raised to marry. They are not available for anything else! 🤷♀️
@@ellenmorse8559 Thank you for watching and commenting! Giving someone a ring is fine, if that is what they want. But marrying that person is a whole different level of risk. I know plenty of beautiful women in the 50 and over age group who would love to be in a monogamous relationship with a successful, intelligent, fit man without getting married. The downside risk of getting married is too great for most successful men over 50. There are exceptions, but they are rare.
@ Within the upper echelons of society, women nowadays are equally concerned. After 50, they most likely own real estate, investment portfolios, lucrative businesses and positions of high remuneration. Marriage is still a good bet if both parties are in accord about the safety of their assets. That’s why we have you to forge an ironclad prenup! ☺️
@@jcnlaw Well - you know a lot of immoral women. And men. I have no problem with the advice not to marry. I do have the problem suggesting men cohabitate for the benefits of marriage without the marriage. Seems to encourage selfishness when a pre-nup would take care of the "what if" question.
All I know is that our paths in this life are different. Even through tough situations, we still learn something about ourselves, our lives, and life in general. We need to choose what is best for us without being afraid to do certain things just because they did not work out for others. What would be the point of being alive if we can't live?
THANK You Jonathan... 🙂👍 -70SomethingGuy
@@jarichards99utube You are welcome!
I'm 52 and never did marry, and definitely don't plan to now. Videos like this are very affirming of the path I chose lol
I tell my kids that marrying a great woman puts you in heaven - marrying an evil woman puts you in hell. I've been to heaven twice and hell once.
Very good advice! I think people make a mistake when they confuse spirituality/commitment with government involvement/mandates! Don't do something that can ultimately hurt you and possibly cost you your life savings and children's inheritance!
So Sad people don't believe in Marriage anymore !
*So sad it has all become about money ! 😔😕☹️
Oh boy 😅
It’s a cloudy day already sir‼️😎
Here I’m trying to stay positive and hopeful… then … you happen ‼️🙈🙈🙈😹😹🫢🫢
@@ruthosornio8299 I love your comment! Stay positive! Good things can happen if you stay positive!
This is one of the best pieces advice on TH-cam. Marriage is totally unnecessary.
Some states consider you married after living togeather for a small amount of time..which is mind boggling to me
Marriage is about routine. Men do it for the access to regular physical affection. No man is going to just have a BF/GF relationship and the woman cuts off the physical and that man stays unless that woman was a Sugar mama to him. Then he will just cheat anyways.
Never underestimate the power of food. A great cook is valuable. I value a great meal higher than physical attention.
@@naps3386 great healthy meals are simple cheap to make u lazy putz
62 yo male married to a former 38 yo model, PhD, now CFO for multinational company and we have an amazing family
You are lucky you have a sugar mama, way to go until she ditches you for a new boy toy when you’re 80.
@MB-uy5kh I have my own company and money..I'd be fine.
Sounds great but I'd have anxiety. I'd rather pay my own way thru life.
@@mondoenterprises6710 We’ve been together 30 years. We still do everything together, but she is pretty busy. I have a good salary too, so its not money that keeps us together.
@@NeverTakeNoCut-offs Good to hear. If I was a 38 yo man CEO I would probably not want to be with a 62 yo woman. It would have to be an extraordinary situation. I'd be very insecure about it. It must be an incredible rare connection. It does seem bizarre unless your Trump Mick or Rupert. Good for you.
Like someone once wrote: Traditions like marriage are just peer pressure from friends and dead ancestors
That someone must have had an empty soul, sadly enough. If you first establish a sincere, spiritual relationship with God, then you will find a partner who feels the same. Only then will you be able to have a successful and long lasting marriage. Your mutually spiritual relationship with the Lord, who considers you as "one" after marriage, will forever be the "glue" that maintains your marriage through thick or thin.
"There is no winning! Only degrees of losing!"
@BenderMohawk i tell my kids. In an infinite universe. There is no success or failure, just outcomes.:)
Excuse me sir, sexual immorality is a sin...we are not DOGS or animals...but, yes, what woman wants sex after fifty...you are correct...I do not want a dirty bed to constantly cause more laundry...not to mention all the other cleaning up after, that a man requires...they can live like DOGS alone...I am fine...no more yeast infections either...I can get my rest, finally...
Thank you very much for watching and commenting! I welcome all points of view, even if you may not agree with the message in this video. Many women want great sex and loving companionship after 50. Even most dogs love companionship. Thanks again for watching and joining the conversation!
I'm 47 and in a good LTR for the last 10 years. If I become single again I would not cohabitate with a woman ever again. You can't afford palimony or divorce after 40.
I saw a very important saying. Who wins in a gray divorce?
.
The lawyers. The other parties lose.
I know about two older men that got into long term FWB relationships with women. Each person had their own place and never lived together with their female companions. One eventually split up. Other had his FWB companion until he died this year. He even included her in his will.
DONT DO IT! Been alone for 30 plus years and I love being alone with my pets.
@@SuzannePepin-r1r Thank you for watching and commenting! Happy to have you as part of my TH-cam community!