How to Help Your Child Express Their Feelings
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 20 ต.ค. 2024
- As parents, we want what's best for our children and part of well being is being able to express our feelings. Dr. Paul Jenkins teaches us 5 tips on how to help our children express more often:
1. Our own example
2. Teach them some vocabulary
3. Experiences
4. Practice empathy and reflective listening
5. Listen
Watch and Enjoy!
Dr. Paul Jenkins
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Video by Nate Woodbury
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Absolutely so! Thank you ! Listen! I wish my parents would have applied this to us in our childhood. Our expression was not allowed or of importance in any situation!❤
Glad you will do differently.
Yes, it works! I raised my children using these techniques and they are the best young adults I can ask for. No trouble at all during the dreaded teenage years. Their teachers were always amazed at how balanced and wise/mature mt children were at school. They share everything with me, we are like best friends. BUT it's not easy to get to this stage! It takes a lot of determination and work. I admit, I don't want to go back to do it over again. I am drained
Thank you for your testimonial, ay. The techniques are not easy, but effective. Thank you for commenting.
Hhhhhhhhhohohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Hhihhhhhvchchohhh
A good effective patents needs skills..just like entering the job market..but the one life job which needs so much more ...people with enter it with no knowledge..
Even with skills..it is a hard work..24 7..must step back from being a helicopter parent ....
Teaching responsibility with choices and respecting those choices ..teaching favorable consequences as a result of good choices and less than favorable from a choice not made well.. and its unfavorable outcome..this is how learning responsibility is. Taught and engrained. It stops helicopter parenting
and places the responsibilities back in their ballfield and not yours
This is the goal of maturity
Thank you so much. I was looking for this for my 4 year old. She is great at expressing bored, worried, relaxed, scared, happy, shy, but I needed more of the in between feelings and creating scenarios to use these to help her think more about what she feels, express them, and feel much more understood - making her a happier much more grounded child.
Mariah, ah, you are the mother your child needs.
I love your channel, I have being watching your videos daily for the last month! I feel so much relieve after learning some of your parenting lessons!! My favorite lesson is: "Your job as a parent is to love your kid, no matter what!" I feel that, and I am grateful for finding your channel and really focus on becoming a better mum for my baby!! THANK YOU SO MIUCH!
I'm so glad! Welcome to Live On Purpose.
Such light has been turned on for me, I kept wanting him to be more mature because of his age, but not his age is his stage! So I've taken back the control and give no leeway about when he's acting u[p. this week has gone so smooth, he's throwing fewer tantrums, and we are both happier!
Your comment has made my day, Darkocean S. This is exactly why I started the channel. Grateful for you and all Positive Parents.
So simple but never thought about it!
So glad to help you out with this, UX Design Dojo! Honored to be on your team.
I wish we can all take the time to allow our children to express feelings in result of less people killing out of anger.
I think one of the best things we can do for our society as a whole is to do a better job raising our kids. Thanks Mariana for being part of the conscious parenting community! DrPaul
OMG, what a video! Your kids might not be perfect but I am sure they are amazing! Thank you for this again and again! "Benevolent powerful loving force" Chills! THANK YOU Dr. Paul!
Pati Mascarenhas, I think they are amazing.
Thank you Dr. Paul, you have such a fantastic channel. This video give me more basic tools to work with my family. I've very little grounding in the emotional area, so these videos are so helpful to me without the instructions getting complex.
Michael, thank you so much for your kind comment. I'm honored to be on your team! You may also want to get on the pre-order list for the Parenting Power-up Audio Course coming soon - parentingpowerup.com
DrPaul
You are wonderful. Thank you so much for your videos.
My pleasure Sonia, honored to be on your team! DrPaul
Agree
I am soothed by the kinetic sand. It lived on our kitchen table in a pan for weeks, and We would all mindlessly have our hands in it.
So Fun.
A wonderful video and a clear reminder to any benevolent ,loving and caring parent.Thank you very much Sir
Thanks Jerome - especially the reference to benevolent, loving and caring parents! Honored to be on your team. DrPaul
Great advice, especially about the kinesthetic material while they talk and i listen and i love rhe vocabulary advice too
I love that stuff, Stacey Boling. Thank you for watching.
I've been waiting for this!! Amazing video
Was it you that requested this one? Trying to bring what you want! Thanks for being here Aly - DrPaul
Live On Purpose TV Yes!! it was... I knew you were answering this one right for me, thanks!! 🙏🙏
Thank you 🙏
You’re welcome 😊
M listening to ur videos back to back for my daily routine wid my family.. It s so helpful and made me think more to be joyful and ways to give tat to my family. Thank u
Wonderful, G K. Glad you are doing this as a family. That is the way to produce real change.
Thank you sonvery much for your posts. Truly I enjoy and have learned so much from these.💜
queenSummerKeli, honored to be on your team.
Thank YOU!! great tips!! 👏😀
Honored to be on your team, Wendi Watson.
Liked the video even before I heard it!!...I know that you give the best in ur videos...thanks!
Ruby, I'm so honored by your comment, and that you would invite me into your parenting team. All the best! DrPaul
Thank you Dr Paul you are amazing. .. :)
Thank you for being at Live On Purpose and commenting, Sha0812. Honored to be on your team.
Dr. Paul, I really enjoyed your approach to this topic, as always. Thank you for the info! I would really enjoy an additional video focused on changing the way you feel, in relation to each of the three stages of maturity that you described in your other videos. This type of video would be helpful for a variety of ages from toddler to adults.
Thank you!!
Drake
You are welcome, Drake Kessler. Thank you for the idea, I have put it on the production list and will consider it.
Great content! I truly appreciate the video!
LESLIE LYNN, thank you! I appreciate you watching.
Amazing advice god bless you
Thanks and welcome
They do know other one very well... "BORED!" lol. Thank you for the valuable info!
Stephani Reece, honored to be on your team.
I love kinetic sand!!! Is very stress relief for me and my twins. We love it!
ChicBaja1990, it's the best.
Wow, I wish my mom had this video to watch 35 years ago... I have been a mess in this area.
I think our moms did the best they knew how to do. I'm really grateful for our information age where we can share ideas. Thanks for watching Susaville! DrPaul
Mine too. BTW I love your profile picture, is that a schnauzer? I have one too! Cool breed 😎
THANKUUU u r amazing,,, doing great job
mandeep Kaur, honored to be on your team.
So you have a video on defiant kids? Currently dealing with a testy , defiant kid at home and school. She is in kindergarten. We are very positive , compassionate and loving towards her. We don’t yell and she does listen at home but at school is a little different.
Alexandra Ivanova, I hope the video helped and gave you some ideas. Be firm and loving, calm face, calm voice, calm body.
Dr. Paul this is SO helpful. Should we adapt anything on #4 when talking to a 4 yo? My child is going through life changes and having anger outbursts, I'm trying to help her open up. Thanks for being part of the team.
Absolutely S P - these steps are particularly important for kids who are just in the early stages of developing their skill set for dealing with powerful emotions. A 4-year-old is in a very formative stage and will be highly influenced by your example and teaching. As always, you want to appropriately adapt and flex depending on your child's stage of development. For a quick review, take another look at this video (link below). Honored to be on your parenting team! DrPaul
th-cam.com/video/1SFIc2LsHyA/w-d-xo.html
Amazing!
Thanks!
Listen and silent. I don't think that is a coincidence.
Thanks for another helpful video.
You are welcome, Mick Bowe. Honored to have you here - glad you are finding value in the videos.
Dr. Paul... as always, I sincerely gain so much from all your videos that not only apply to myself and my child, also to my friends, family and profession. I do have a question that I have not found relation to on your channel, and I would love to hear your suggestions. My husband and I have divorced. We are on good terms, in fact, we get along better now than we ever have. However, my child's father has started dating again and is seeing someone. While yes she is nice and all, my 6 yr old is developing some trust and respect issues not only with his dad, but with other males in our core group of people (his coaches, grandfathers, etc.) As you have suggested so many times, I have repeatedly told him that we love him no matter what... however, when he comes home from the brief "every-other-weekend" with his dad, he's very sensitive. He asks questions that are very hard for me to answer (that his dad refuses to acknowledge) like "why he has to share his time with his dad's girlfriend" ... I'm trying very hard not to give him false information, I just hate diffusing his feelings as if they don't matter. Being the product of a very nasty divorce my own parents dragged my brother and myself through, I do not want any of that for him. I want to continue to encourage him to share his feeling with me, and have confidence that I am being truthful with him without being judgemental of his father's choices.
Hi Kelli Deloach, you are right, your son's feeling matter. If your ex does not answer your son's questions, you can do so in a very calm, straightforward manner. His dad has chosen to have a girlfriend and would like the two of them to get to know one another. That happens when they spend time together. You really don't need to go beyond that. He may not like it and you can choose to listen to his objections or not. It would be best coming from his dad but if his dad chooses not to talk about it, then it would be better to get answers from you than no one.
@@LiveOnPurposeTV Thank you SO much. It's very true. I do want him to have answers and just know that we love him, and nothing changes that.
I think my emotional dysregulation as a Mother, being overwhelmed easily, has had an effect on my children where they push down their feelings.
I want to let them know I will hold space for thier feelings, without becoming overwhelmed so they can rely on me. How can I show them I am capable to holding space for thier feelings too?
When they express something to you, be calm. Calm face, calm voice, calm body. Listen and ask if they want help. Don't try to solve their problems. Tell them you have some ideas and if they want to listen let you know.
tx for the tips 👌 my 17 yr old daughter makes fun of my feelings and laughs at me 😟 i try and ignore it, remain calm, try not to take it to heart ❤️
Clover Fois, I am sorry to hear that your daughter does that to you. Glad you are not taking it personally though. Perhaps she is going through some stuff internally and is taking it out on you. This might be another good video to watch, so you can help her learn more appropriate behavior: "Teaching Children Respect In 10 Minutes Or Less" - th-cam.com/video/d8c4I7_vlqw/w-d-xo.html
Thanks for being at Live On Purpose TV.
Another great video
Thanks again!
My son loves crayola model magic. I highly recommend.
Thanks, Tina, might have to get some for the grandkids.
How to do it: First let your child ACTUALLY talk for once instead of yelling at them and making them feel like crap.
PanNonBitvh, I agree, parents should yell less and listen more.
Dear Dr.Paul, pleas help us to behave well with our kids who are a few months ,one year old too , the basic relationships are as important ….
I would even say they are vital to our society.
Liked! 😃 great tips! 👏
Wendi Watson, thanks for the feedback.
Is permission something like it’s okay to cry and encourage them to come and talk about it if the feeling doesn’t go away?
Yes, that is a good place to start.
My daughter exhibits anger more often at her current age. Yes she sees a behavior theropist. However it seems more to keep them in a status to pull away from us ( my current wife and I. Iv been combating this by when they miss sessions with this person. I offer them to do things they enjoy. In ways that allows them to bring to surface how they feel. An example would be how my daughter and wife enjoy arts and crafts. I ensure that she has paint and camvus to let things in her mind come out into reality. Even dancing can be a method of expression. When she " dances" like her mother. I ask her is this the attention you seek and if so why. I don't disparig her mother. I just bring to light what is happening in a way she can understand and appreciate.
Michael ORTA, I am glad you are supporting your child inn the things that matter to her.
I try all the time to talk to my daughter. I'll ask how school was and I get the same response ' good'. I can't get her to open up. I don't think she would tell me if it wasn't 'good'. What else can I say to her?
Ask her something specific. Who did you sit with at lunch? What was your favorite part of the assembly today? Some people have a couple of questions they ask their child everyday, Tell me something negative, positive and another thing every day. Give it a try, Maria Keenan.
i am crying ...
Maya Sss, glad to have you at the channel.
Dr. Paul, I need your help
Raquel Meyer, I am honored to be on your team. You can schedule a call with one of our coaches at www.drpauljenkins.com/breakthroughcall to find out what services we offer.
My boy can't express how he feels and I seem to make it worse when I ask him about it. He cries and then I cuddle him and he is ok, I let go and he is back to crying again. He is 10 with adhd and dyslexia. Im so worried ive caused this because of PND. He has talapies when born and has been through a lot. I want to support him but I think I make him worse. Please I need help.
Lesley Webster, is he ever talking about his feelings or coming up with a resolution. He may be in the stuck mode of just feeling them and not knowing what to do with them.
@@LiveOnPurposeTV yes he is definitely stuck in them and cant explain what he is feeling. He just seems so sad, I didnt know if it could be part of his hormones kicking in he is turning 11 this year and moving up to big school and im quite worried he isn't ready for it. He is achieving at a level of an 8 year old according to his school.
Im parent of three kids. All below teenage. What can i do to make sure that they share everything related to anything in their life with me.
Nkhetan29, I am so honored to have you at Live On Purpose TV. Please remember that your number 1 job is to love your children no matter what and even if, not "make sure" that your children do anything because you can't. Get clear on what you do control and what you don't. However, you can teach and influence them because you love them. Here are some videos I think might help you:
"How To Be A Good Listener For Kids" - th-cam.com/video/UkPNs-4TpLo/w-d-xo.html
"Positive Communication With Your Child" - th-cam.com/video/Zy1Q2uMycCg/w-d-xo.html
"How To Get Someone To Open Up To You" - th-cam.com/video/Pq8N7lrQ2Kw/w-d-xo.html
The permission thing did not make sense.
Susan Clay, I am sorry, perhaps it will make sense in another video.
First line hit me like a ton of bricks 🤯
Glad to have you at Live On Purpose, Tyri Joyner. Thank you for watching.
Thank you 😊 🙏
You’re welcome 😊
Great tips! Thank you so much!
Nakahara Karin, honored to be on your team.
Thank you 🙏
Tairka Hi, honored to be on your team.