#TheLoveHour
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 10 ก.พ. 2025
- In today's episode Melissa and Kev take questions that cover the kite and string dynamic and intimacy.
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Thank you for watching today's video!
In today's video, Kevin & Melissa discuss:
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“My definition of success is ability to say no without consequence”
yessss
🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽
Chile Melissa hit the nail on the head! When a woman has to do everything, she definitely feels like “why is he here? I can do this by myself bc I am” and feels like having an extra child.
OMG yes sis…speak…so true!
Facts!!!
Exactly!
Many times, women have done everything that the man was supposed to do. You had a house and car when he met you, so what is his purpose in the relationship? And, if he had been taught that his value is entrenched in monetary/material gain, what value will he see in immaterial? Does she see value in immaterial? It’s a little more complicated than ‘why can’t he just...’.
@@ocbfdog actually the 1% pushes men to view their value as financial so it can work them to death. BTW men set society up so in the past women could work but never make enough to support herself or a family. Today most women value a man who isn't lazy and are emotionally stable themselves, and can offer her the same level of support she is expected to give him. Also it's been said before but splitting chores 50/50 but then expecting women to manage everything ( family schedule, important dates, friends, health etc.) is putting more on her shoulders. The manager doesn't stay on the register until a decision needs to be made.
Hey guys! Why not start composing "best of" clips into a full show with voice overs or a bloopers episode for each podcast show. This can be an ongoing project that's done in small increments so when you're in need of a vacation you have shows waiting.
Love this idea!
Brilliant!
Great idea 💡👍🏼
They should hire Jasz Jones for this
The repeated dumbs from Melissa and Kevin eating silently in the distance is hilarious...😂🤣😂
🤣🤣🤣🤣
Killed me 😂😂😂
Dat's DUMB!!!!!!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
😂😂😂😂
This conversation reminds me when my son was hesitant about getting married, and his reason was he didn’t want his marriage to fail like me and his father’s. My advice to him was if you treat your wife like your lover instead of your maid your marriage will work. Help her in the kitchen help her with the laundry help her with the kids just HELP!! Two people working together for the better good of each other.
Great advice!
great advice, not a guarantee for a marriage to work. cause his wife's mum might not advice the same. or subscribe to said advice
Right…. Just like she’s helping him financially support the family.
I disagree because it takes two. The demise of your marriage is the fault of you and your ex-husband. You are not the victim in the story; your son is. Your advice is one-sided and might result in your son wasting his life on a selfish woman. I would him to speak to his father about your marriage, so that he gets both sides.
@@ocbfdog exactly
I ain’t married but my parents are definitely my strings. I’ll come to them with a whole plan a-z about how ima take over the world and they poke holes all in it but instead of telling me to give up they tell me how to solidify/perfect the plan. “The string let’s the kite fly but makes sure it doesn’t get too close to the sun.”
I love that Melissa wants to make her own money for her dream wedding. I see it as her challenging herself to achieve a goal specifically for herself! That's gonna hit sooooo different.
"You promised this for you!"
“How about you rub a countertop”
I am HOLLLLLLERN ….However, A WORD!
I saw your comment & was wondering how it fit the topic but when it dropped...Melissa definitely is hilarious too😂 Then Kev said "Rub a counter not a coochie"🤣
@@avaholloway32 😂😂
@mrs.kevonstage... my son, in 4th grade... when he walks out of school.. he don't know his classmates either. 🤣🤣🤣🤣 I've seen him ignore a classmates who was in his face saying hi to him. I said son, he's speaking to you. He said. I know. I saw him at school already. 🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣 I fell TF out 🤣🤣🤣🤣
😂🤣😂 I feel his spirit on this!!!
I love your son's response, I am dying!!!!😜
Lol!! 👏 that's the right energy 😂
😂😂😂
😂😂😂 this is too funny. Why do I understand this all too well though
Listen I’m about to go on vacation and the amount of work I need to do to prepare is exhausting!! It’s a LOT, I’m tired. Send help
Liss, the first few minutes of this podcast is like you reading my soul. Thank you for your transparency.
I’m so glad to be validated by someone older than me saying they’re the burnout generation because often Zillennials like myself get looked at like we’re crazy for thinking we need to have life figured out in our 20s, as if that frame of mind wasn’t model by those before us.
31:00- Love the string and kite analogy! You need both and both serve their purpose (string and kite)!!! One without the other will NEVER experience "sustained flight". No kite - the string will never experience the wind, the sky, what it feels like to be in the air. No string - the kite won't be able to sustain flight, experience long periods in the sky cause it will just crash and burn. The string adjusts in order for the kite to stay in the sky. Both serve a purpose and both allow each to sustain flight (growth)!!!! Great EP!
Kev quietly eating that candy bar is hilarious for some reason
Lol I think it’s a pop tart
@@Deajalewis it’s definitely pop tart 😂😂😂
@@Deajalewis that makes it even funnier lol them tiny bites
It’s a pop tart
Oh my goodness Melissa, you nailed it, why is it my responsibility as a wife to tell my husband what he needs to do? Everyday!
There's flexibility but much more responsibility because you can never clock out
I learned that some podcasts have breaks in their advertising contracts. You may want to consider having two weeks a year or once per quarter that you work into the contract for vacation.
I realized Dumb is Melissa's curse word lol
LISSEN! Melissa putting out a whole WORD on household chore ownership
When Melissa talked about Partnership in marriage : Preach Preacha!!! 🙌🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Consideration is what most ppl lack. The letter about the dishes, she mentioned how she took into account how her action (cooking) would impact the amount of dishes & she purchased disposables to lessen the amount. Consider how your action will impact someone & make adjustments for the sake of the person not to gain for self.
1) I love the stats. Keep 'em, please.
2) I haven't heard the kite/string analogy but I'm 100% a string. I'm single but at work my boss is a complete kite and I have to figure out how to tactfully bring some contingency to her ideas b/c her favorite phrase is, "We'll figure it out," and I'm looking at her like, "Yeah... how 'bout now?"
I appreciate y’all talking about your entrepreneur woes. Happy to hear you’re on vacation!
Sephora in JC Penny won't take returns from Sephora only locations... that's DUMB🤯
...And if you buy Sephora gift card at JCP, you can't use it at the stand alone locations!😑
It has to with how they are connected to JC Penny who is paying for the Sephora to be there. So in the supply chain world it’s JCPenny inventory that they had paid for from Sephora. I hope that makes sense. You cannot use your Sephora card in there either.
This reminds me of when I used to work there ( JC Penney Sephora)
Well y'all really need to take a break cause I'm behind on the episodes anyway! Trying to watch all the podcasts and keep up with my whole life is a lot of work. I don't be wanting to miss episodes!
Try listening while you commute or clean around the house. But I understand, I feel like that sometimes but I’m grateful for their content
I do. but I especially like to listen to The Love Hour together with my husband. We have great conversations around the content. It's really been a blessing.
@@anneb6262 I listen to HTT at work!
@@antoniaathawilliams7 lol me too
The " you promised you" hit me hard.. WOW
For vacation weeks, maybe do the “best of” podcast episodes? Girl we will still listen ❤️
Kev realizing how good he got it in the last 10 minutes 🤣
I'm burnt out now. Have to take an hour to decompress after work in silence.
The comparison about working for someone and being clocked out unfortunately doesn't work anymore. We are often expected to be available, working or on call for jobs that AREN'T that serious! If we're not working in a hospital then it's not life or death.... leave us alone!!!
THAT part!!!! 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
The break up is my favorite movie ! Every single scene is so realistic (to a certain extent) and it’s incredibly funny. In my mind they get back together in the end and appreciate each other more.
This rant touched my soul.
With the Kite and String, you sometimes need a safe word. You can have a discussion about whatever the word is beforehand but the meaning behind the word should be "Hey I support you but I need more clarity. I can't see what you'rere trying to do yet but I'd like to see it. I need this information in order to see it......."
I like this idea!
Household chores contributing to marriage dissatisfaction! Never a truer word!
Real, is it the chores or the sexism and lazyness of too many men who think house work is for the wife?
i love the little smile Melissa does after she says something clever. she is so beautiful
I never heard the string and kite analogy but I can relate to both depending on who I’m paired with. In my relationship with my mom-I’m the string! And with my dad- I’m the kite. My mom is optimistic and my dad is pessimistic. It’s a hilarious combo
Me sitting here waiting to hear that Melissa will be a guest host on The Real. Don't worry I'm patient. I do enjoy her commentary.
Love the discussion of work burnout ! Very candid conversation
I don't know why it was so funny to me but when Melissa said "Did you know...." when they were talking about the dishes, I CACKLED!!
I was passed over for a promotion because I was a single mom and they thought that I wouldn't be able to be available 24/7. Smh
It wasn’t meant for you. And as I single mom, you’re not. Your responsibility is to your family, dear
@@jmelanierenee yes. Understood. Just showing that some 9 to 5's expect you to give your whole life.
That is ridiculous. Was the promotion paying that “I’m available 24/7” money? So many of these places wanna work people to death for chump change.😒
That's discrimination. If you have the skills and the experience, that's all that needs to be taken into consideration. If they were stupid enough to articulate that to you, you should explore your options Sis. 👀
Kev couldn't even find his words for sex less than 10x per year. 🤣🤣🤣
Hello (in my Melissa voice) 🤣🤣🤣
I know right! He looked completely distraught!
YOU PROMISED YOU!
Ya'll have reached need assistant level lol
Their niece Rebecca was their assistant the last I heard.
Saw it live, pulling up for the channel ep.❤ The dead bedroom reddit thread is one of the saddest things I've read, I really hope it gets better for that couple
38:13 my God!
As much as I love my Husband, I often fantasize about living separately...........I even pray about him helping me out more around the house, it's that bad!
It's the head scratch for me after the sexless marriage numbers. 🤣🤣🤣🤣
I love the statistics Liss! Keep them coming!
The jewels ya’ll are dropping on Entrepreneurship on here are so awesome! Maybe another podcast idea? :-)
That entire conversation topic at the 40 min mark. Wholeheartedly agree. How i ended in mines. I asked for a partner not a dependent. A man refuse to work cant live or be with me. Equal me or go. Either is fine cause the mess i dont need
If Lis isn't a licensed therapist, with a practice and luxury office within the next 10 years, idk wtf is life cuz these gems 👏👏👏👏 my single ass is taking ALL THE NOTES
I understand the vent… please know your audience IS COMMITTED! Like we really love y’all…. If a video didn’t come one week, we will be back the week after like always 👌🏾
I agree I can't watch anyone's videos every week. I need frequent breaks to live my own life
Friendship , communication and effort.
Liss you guys give sooo much. You could do seasons for all the podcasts AND get an assistant
I hate housework! I truly, truly, truly hate it! Growing up a freaking Saturday on a nice day was dedicated to housework, and within 24-48 hours one could NEVER tell that he house was clean. My future husband must promise me all the right things including a housekeeper. PERIOD!!!! I may put it in our vows. That is how serious I am.
All of this Melissa!!!!! The "What do you want me to do" Oh Lord!!!!
This episode was soooo good! Really enjoyed it, a lot of great pointers.
I LOVE y'all and your perspective! That's it, that's the comment! 💕💕
When Liss said ‘How about you rub a countertop?’ Ooohhh chiiiiile I felt that!!!!!
OMG your rant 🤣😂😂. Entrepreneurship is a 24/7 job. Take care of yourselves. 💗
First off, NEVA break a promise to yourself ‼️. Also take much needed time especially if you can. I love saying PTO(Prepare The Others) I will be out of the office for 2wks. They be scrambling, but oh well😎
Prepare the Others is everything!!! 😂✊✊✊
Whew! The kite and string conversation are the epitome of my husband and me. I'm the string.
Thank you both for posting this although you are away!!! Enjoy your vacation Y'All!!!✌🏾💕 #BeGratefulthatYourWorkIsFromTheLORD #BalanceisStillNeeded #HappyDreamsAreReal
I skipped over this for a few days, but baby!! you are speaking to my relationship
I can believe those statistics for sure. I have 2 married friends that stopped having sex 10-15 years in and now even have separate bedrooms but still enjoy having a partnership 🤷
dishes are my issue too!!!!!! I feel the writer of this letter
Yasssss. You can be frustrated but not complaining. Both things can be true.
Me: literally sitting at my work desk 24 hours after a DOCTOR told me I sprained my ENTIRE ASS (lower BACK, TAILBONE, AND GLUTEUS MAXIMAS)
Melissa and Kev: don't let society shame you into not taking the time you need.
Me:🤡
Oh wow! Take care of yourself. You gotta do what u gotta do, but also healing is affected by stress... I pray the Holy Spirit guides you to balance and that your load is light during this time 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
girl.... take some time. I hope you feel better.
A lot of pod casts maybe change the frequency from weekly to every other week. I just need Bald and the Beautiful WEEKLY!!! 🙏🏽👌🏽👈🏽
Im in my 20s and so far im only at 12 a year smh …. I miss the streets
No hate but y’all should count your blessings that y’all still able to go on vacation.
Never been on vacation 2019 managed to save a little bit of cash to try and actually go on vacation, but my bad luck covid happened.
Used that saving for food and rent. With being on the vulnerable list due to bad health I’m never going To be able to go on vacation ever
For the last 3 episodes I been going on Lack of Color trying to find Liss’ hat just to find out it’s Kevin’s lolol
Kevin eating his snack like he didn’t have permission 🤣
Melissa Neeeeded that vacay …. And then some. I hope she got it as best she could !
Also so true ! My psychiatrist is East Indian … just seeing his last name made me skeptical but it worked out 🤷🏾♀️
Lesson being I’ll judge my mama next time 😂
Melissa is preaching…if I have to tell you what to do, you are not owning it!!!! Child yes!
If I feel like I run the household, and you want me to tell you what to do, you are the dependent -BOOM, marriage-saver
Liking Melissa's hat.
This conversation can go either way. I know alit of men who do most of the household chores, work full time and then get no play from home base.
Rub a counter, not a cootchie 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Kevvvvvvvvvvvv!!
The only time I've seen Kev speechless! 🤣🤣🤣
That last question...... I dont know... And don't want to assume.... But when people please themselves physically (masturbation) IT WILL take over the ability of your spouse to please YOU bc your so busy pleasing yourself.
I love this intro so much.
The idea that she is willing to give up sex completely is 😳 girl. Y’all already married. Y’all better work this out cause the rest of life without sex seems like a lot to bear.
Y’all need an assistant 💕🤗 hope you had some much needed rest on vacation 🌴🌴
Bruh--this episode is triggering me all over the place for so many reasons. 1. Many men are taught that a woman OWES them sex; many men in church are taught that’s the very reason why they should get married; so they can have sexual with her whenever THEY want; it’s capital because know that her desire quite frankly has nothing to do with anything. I’m not saying most; I am saying many. Which is too many people. 2. About the sexless marriage and the lack of connection-- bruh it’s people out here getting married just to say they’re married. Period. There are women getting married because society says they should not because they are in love with dude. That couple with the bad sex; I’m wondering if they grew up in church and waited to have sex before marriage. Many church folks do abs don’t even touch each other or even kiss; therefore they have no idea about anything. Admittedly I’m a little biased; but what’s that mean for the woman? Especially one that’s forcing herself---I don’t know about anyone else-- for me; that’s so close to sexual assault and rape. That’s so scary to think women are in these situations and that I could have easily been one of them. @kevonstage @mrskevonstage you are truly so blessed to be married to each other and be genuinely in love and have so much connection. Kev often says as a joke- which I don’t think that he realizes the implication- I know you have a heart for people --but the joke you make about “Ceily Sex” from the color purple; that’s not sex; she’s being raped….every time. And unfortunately some people are living thst or a version of that. God help us. Love you both
I definitely identified with this comment!!! It was spot on. The first few years of my marriage, I had sex with my husband out of the “church’s” message that it was my duty and obligation. I sometimes wanted to cry in the middle of it. It was no fault of my husband because I didn’t share how I was feeling until we were over 10 years in. I love the Lord, but the church was brainwashing me about this subject. I felt sooo guilty for not wanting sex. Finally, I sought the Lord on the matter and He told me there should be no guilt and no shame. My husband and I are now working through it. One of the main factors is that we are starting to use a house cleaning service next month. I work (A LOT) and our daughter has a lot of activities, so when the pressure of also taking care of the home comes into the picture, that’s one of the reasons of why I feel completely overwhelmed. The thought of sex is overwhelming and causes me so much anxiety. I can’t even describe it. I’ve always been this way- low sex drive. The church needs to STOP making wives (and even husbands) feel guilty if they don’t have the same sex drive as their spouse. That DOES NOT help anyone and it is NOT from God! Thank you for your comment!
Most men needs to know that you can catch more bees with honey!! Than with lemons!!
I totally identify with Melissa it’s like I’m grateful for this life I get to live but it’s exhausting 😂.
This Is me speaking as a mom to a 9mo baby and in my life 2nd year in graduate school. I’m like “Children are a blessing but mehn!!!!”😂
Kevin was dumbfounded, speechless, and so very disappointed with those numbers.
Whats the name of your intro song? I have wanted to ask for sometime now but since my autistic son likes it I must download this song... Great show!!
Well that's what's going on with my husband and I... I hate it but lately we've been trying to work on it. (And get THIS... I'm the one who wants it all the time 🤣🤣)
Hey Yall!! Morning!!🙋🏽♀️👋🏽
2 things I feel like I'm a the kite and the string so idk if I'll ever match with someone2 my grandmother's never worked and they were both black. Love you guy yall are one of my favorite couples to watch and listen to
R.e. the household chore situation. Now put yourself in the scenario that the man is the stay at home dad and the wife is the business woman.
Mental and physical health can play a part in sexual health.
Liss: there are more than 20 million sexless marriages in the US
Joshy: TWENTY MILLIONNNNN....*insert scream, eye roll and fainting emoji*
Now, if the single, 20 something young man is shocked, how do you think the "seasoned", married folks feel...and by seasoned, I mean us 40+ folks 😋🙄🤔
Quick question: did that statistic account for the elderly couples that don't or can't have sex anymore? If it includes them, then the statistic is a bit skewed. But damn.
Who wants to have sex when you can't even concentrate on enjoying it cause you thinking about them dishes in the sink and them clothes that need to be folded and put away.
Can the kite & string trade places at any given time? 🤔
I get it..when it comes down 2 not having sex but only 10x a yr. I hate 2 say it, but I TOTALLY get it.😒😔😭
So do I
Hell naw! I rebuke the getting of any of this blasphemy! 😆
@@chrisisslick 🤣
I feel like I could have written the email about dishes verbatim except I have 3 kids🤣🤣🤣
Y’all better preach🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾