@n01YES! I think that was it! I had remembered the alliteration of "wealth whispers" but couldn't remember if the other was "money" or "rich", or what it ended up doing. "Money talks" on its own is already an expression, so I think the combo works well together.
Hell yes. My wife and I never got in the habit of living beyond our means. We have decent incomes and we buy silly things sometimes, but cash only, never on credit, and never on impulse either. And we buy stuff for ourselves, not for the neighbors. One thing I found it is that not worrying overly much about the everyday purchases you make at the supermarket or at Starbucks or whatever, can be an expensive luxury. It's a luxury I can afford and I am willing to pay for, within reason, but that's been a conscious choice. We did have to get a mortgage for our home. The feeling of freedom we got when we finally paid it off is indescribable.
Saw a short where the same sentiment was expressed: rather have a plastic bag with $5000 in it than a $4900 designer bag with $100. The latter is faux rich, that bag will prob get $200 on resale (last year’s fashion). The former is as the content creator says is freedom from knowing next month’s rent/mortgage, utilities and food can be paid or a dental emergency isn’t a crisis.
I see this all the time. My parents were that way in the 80s, they seemed rich and when they got a divorce they both had to downgrade every aspect of their lives. While I never had to go without essentials it was a lesson. I remember working with someone who had a big fancy house and 2 BMWs and she was crying about a $700 car repair and had a yard sale to try and get some extra money. I was sitting there with my small old house and Kia thinking "what? I would have NO problem with that car repair". I was 29 or 30, and she was closer to 40 at the time. AND she had a kid! It was eye opening!
Yep, the news is always saying how a majority of Americans don't have even a few hundred dollars in a savings account to cover an emergency expense. That is just mind blowing to me.
@@nancie7487Sorry, but not true. We have kids, a paid off house, no debt and our net worth is over $1 million…and we’re still in our 30s. Seeing us on the street, you’d never know it though. We drive older used vehicles, we live in a very modest house and we never try to keep up with others. Our goal was always to have a paid off home and to be secure, so we made the necessary financial decisions all along the way to get there.
One of the best comments on here.... I'm frugal also because I don't buy things that show less quality and value than what I apply to earn the money to pay them. I have realized that bad products and service is the BEST way for me to save,... because I don't buy that crap.
I agree! This has become more apparent as products are been made with cheaper materials more than ever. I feel ripped of at a dealership, jeweler, furniture shop, grocery store let’s not forget clothing shops. Furnitures being made of plastic materials selling at wood prices are the worse of them all!
The book is about 20 years old. One of the best books I've ever read (and owned). If you only read one book this year read - The Millionaire Next Door. Still available on Amazon.....
I often remember this Sublime quote that lead singer wore on his t-shirt. "Poor, ugly, happy". I got teased a lot by family and friends and when I was in 3rd and 4th grade we were really poor. ..but I remember some of those times as the best. I also remember that when I got treated really bad in higher grades I would go off by myself and those are the times I felt I got to know myself and connect with something deeper that was so amazing I felt my spirit fly free and I felt so happy inside. I value that more than anything.
I bought an older house, upgraded the attic insulation, insulated the basement walls and made sure the roof was always in good shape. No other major upgrades. Kitchen is old but everything works, original hardwood floors still in place and the bathroom still has the original layout. If things work, I don't upgrade to impress people. Also drive used cars until they are not worth repairing. House was paid off before I was forty and I was able to retire at age 58 when I was laid off.
Having a paid house is life changing! My story is similar to your, i worked on my house over the years to better it and i'm getting close! Older house are sometime made better and less cheaply than brand new one: it is time tested, mine is from 1959 and is quite charming and modern now, i love it!
Exactly! On a call in show I listen to someone called in that was making $750,000 a year and they were living paycheck to paycheck. Could barely pay their bills, had zero in savings and nothing saved for retirement. They were in their late 40’s, maybe early 50’s. I was shocked! In all my working life I’d only made over $100,000 a year once, and that year I worked so much overtime I was exhausted. I can’t even imagine “ not being able to make it “ as these people said, on $750,000 a year! What a big waste of money!
Was it Dave Ramsay's show? It's crazy how many calls he gets with stories like that. Sorry, but I have zero sympathy for someone making six figures that claims they can't save any money. They are doing something wrong and don't want to live below their means. Even if I won the lottery tomorrow I'd buy a very modest house because I simply don't need nor want a huge home.
@@PositivelyPam Yes. It was Dave Ramsey. I find his principals useful, but I’m not a fanatic about them. Yes, I had very little empathy for them. So many people have incomes below, or way below $100,000 yet they manage to pay their bills and save for retirement. He pretty much told this caller to buck up, figure it out and be grateful they had so much income.
I have zero sympathy for people like that. They are obviously massively insecure and like to pose in front of other massively insecure people. I could so much with a $750K salary. It would just take me one year of that salary and I'd have all my bills paid, I'd buy a house with a decent deposit and I'd have heaps of cash to stash away for a rainy day fund. Plus, I'd be able to upgrade my old car to something mid range and reliable and buy new furniture for the new house. Some people just don't deserve to be wealthy.
It is also in New Paper articles every so often. "Living paycheck to paycheck while earning $500,000 a year." It is amazing how the can not save money while having difficulty paying for private preschool while also paying the nanny to take care of the kids. It is interesting what they spend money on, while remaining broke.
For many families, automatically putting money away for investments or saving is not a thing. They didn't grow up with the concept. So, they didn't start their working lives knowing it. When they finally realize that they should save and invest a portion of their income, either their fixed costs are too high, because they didn't understand any of the key numbers, or they think savings is pinching cents instead of automatically putting money aside.
During the Covid times I worked as a security guard for high end gated communities. What shocked me about my situation were the large amount of Ubers, Lyfts, Post Mates, and Door Dash deliveries that were done with luxury sports cars. It got to the point where I asked a guy driving a corvette for a delivery why he was doing post mates. He gave me a straight look and said he had to come up with an extra 2k a month or he would lose his car. I then asked that same question to each of the Luxury deliveries and the response were all the same. I think there is an old saying that the emperor has no clothes which tends to be the case for the fake rich.
I worked a minimum wage job with teenagers during covid; it was alarming how many of them were lining up to buy new cars or buy used higher end models. A 19 year old girl I worked with financed a used Audi. An AUDI. We worked in delivery. We only had 2 delivery vehicles and the third person had to use their personal car. She definitely took the Audi on several deliveries. Later she had to quit due to health reasons. Who knows if she kept up with the payments on that car.
I had a home improvement business for years. The first thing you learn is the bigger the house, the less they pay. They are always out of money and want to "settle" the bill for a fraction of the agreed amount (without going to court). It's been said that a broke person will spend all their money trying to look wealthy and a wealthy person always says they are broke.
I believe it… as a lawyer and someone who lives in a modest home. When we eventually renovate our 1983 1,100 sq foot home it will be a beautiful redesign. We may end up building a new home one day or we will do an addition to this home bc it is very quaint and we have half an acre for our garden, a little orchard (some suburban homesteading) so it may be more trouble moving than it’s worth. I think it’s the mentality to for the contractor… I appreciate any skills and talents that help me do what I want and will pay well for it! Bc I hope people do the same for me. That reciprocity is lacking in people.
I did roofing and gutters for 15 years. I got a good glimpse at who really has wealth and who doesn't and the wealthy people aren't always the ones in the gated neighborhoods with $800K houses. Luckily, we only ever got stiffed by one customer. He was a Haitian and a POS human being building a huge house. We almost fought his entire family in the front yard one day. All of us roofers and the shingle delivery driver vs his hood rat family, women and all. He tried to steal the delivery truck and drive away in it when we confiscated the materials he refused to pay for. I don't know if you know any shingle truck drivers, but you do not want to mess with these dudes. They sling 400 bundles of shingles 2-3 times a day. The driver was ready to tear him in half. We ended up putting a lien on his house and abandoning the job. This guy paid cash for his house so its not like he didn't have the money. He was just your typical hood rat scammer Haitian. We would get his tax records in the mail b/c we had a lien on the property and he was always delinquent on his taxes every year. Its not the only job we almost got in a fight over, but it is the only job we ever had the cops called on us and the only job we had to put a lien on. Other than that, the wealthy people I've worked for have been the nicest and kindest people I've ever met.
A few years back there was an elderly lady that always sat next to me in church. When she passed she left 250,000 to the church, $250,000 to the library, $250,000 to a small town museum, and $250,000 to her neices and nephew. Ironically, that same week my husband told me of a lady at work( that always drove the newest BMW). She was being investigated for skimming money from the PTO at her children’s school ( where she was the treasurer). Drives me crazy when one of my good friends always judges people by what they wear or drive!
Local woman is being charged with fraud and theft. She took over 600k from her job over 8 year period. Now i know how they afforded that huge house, brand new vehicles, big boat, all the toys.
I forget where I heard this but I always remember it: “The people who look rich usually aren’t”. In our household, we pay cash for our cars. And I am reminded of a time I was criticized by relatives for not buying something newer and “safer”. Putting aside that all cars break down, and it’s not “if”-it’s “when”, don’t ever let anyone try to pull you down for being financially responsible, especially over something that doesn’t matter very much to you. Ramit Sehti, a popular personal finance guru in the US is a very wealthy man. Yet he owns no real estate and drives an old Honda accord. Why? It doesn’t matter to him and building his wealth is more important to him than wasting resources on impressing other people.
The old Honda Accord is cool but at the same time if you enjoy something, say cars for example, spend money on a fun car in a smart way. Get that old corvette.
I had the luxury of growing up in a fairly affluent suburb. Quite literally, we had "heads" of industry living in close proximity to us. Our neighbour, two doors up ran a manufacturing firm with 400 employees on the shop floor, at one stage. Our neighbour over the back fence had a similar number employed in a commercial air conditioning business. Around the corner, another neighbour ran a very successful yacht fittings factory. In between, there were quite a few "work a day types" that didn't present much differently to the captains of industry. Yeah, the "rich" guys had nicer houses, but not to extremes. Actually, now that I think about it, one lived in a very modest house. His vice was a new Jaguar every two years. His wife drove a Toyota! Then the '80's came along and the "new" money (no money!) came in. Flash houses went up, there were Mercs front and centre in the driveways, boats in the garages, gardeners, pool cleaners and this that and the other thing coming and going all day. Then the recession hit. The captains of industry remained. The "work a day" types remained, but banks put up mortgagee boards on the shiny houses, with the boats and the Mercedes and the swimming pool in the back yard. As a young man, it was indeed a lesson. You can't judge a book by its cover. Money whispers. Debt screams.
@@abhinavdeepsinha3036 By "work a day types", I mean those on modest salaries or wages. Lines of work varied from sales reps. to project managers, doctors, lawyers and everything in between.
"The things you own, end up owning you" is a rephrase of Thomas Merton's original proposition that, "The more things you own, the more things own you."
Of home ownership, and pointing to the front door, I've heard, "This is my new house," and then gesturing towards all the major rooms and spaces, "and this part is the bank's new house."
@@ioelisdf The Onion once had an article where they had an interview with a man who just bought a home. But everywhere they could, they had put in "(the bank's)" or something similar. "Just think of all of the fun my children are going to have in (my bank's) brand new pool!"
I remember one of my colleagues, a young guy who was thinking about selling his apartment gifted by his parents, to buy a new fancy Mercedes... Some people just live in their own imaginary worlds 😅 And those of us who didn't have wealthy parents had faces like😵💫
That's just dumb. I don't know why people live Mercedes. Its over-engineered German scheisse. Anyone who prioritizes a vehicle over a domicile has a room temperature IQ.
We have no mortgage on our 8 yr old home that we had built. Both our vehicles were paid in cash, because interest charges is money out the door. We have a good income, invest, and nothing extravagant. It’s a very comfortable life, and our neighbours have no idea how well financially we are off. Spend within your means, and build on your savings.👍🇨🇦
If I won the lottery rn we would stay in our 1,100 sq foot 1983 home, at least for now. We don’t need or want anything else at the moment. But the difference is it would be paid off and we would be free to do what we wanted.
You don't have to be frugal -- just be mindful about your spending and have a spending plan. e.g. 25% on rent/mortgage, 25% of basic living expenses (utilities/groceries/transport), 25% on retirement savings, and 25% saved and invested (you can decide if that 25% is saving towards your next new car, overseas trip, kids college, or for building up an investment portfolio to eventually become 'financially independent'). The problem is when people think 100% of their pay can be spent on anything they want, and don't even bother tracking where their money is going, let alone make a conscious decision about what they want to spend their income on. ps. If your income is very low, then yes, you will have to be frugal -- but a lot of people earn decent money and still end up with debt and no NW after years or decades of working.
Back in the early 90s, when I started jr high, a bunch of my city's schools were combined. It was so interesting to see the "real" rich kids vs. the wannabes from my part of town. The real rich kids were TOTALLY different from the super popular kids whose parents were fake rich.
I had a friend that I helped negotiate her salary for a new job about 10 years ago (much more responsibility and sales role to boot). She went from $29,000 a year to $100,000 ($72K base plus at least $28K for commission probably more). She stayed in her apartment that she had when she was making $29K and kept her same car, yet after 3 years when that job came to an end she was broke. I remember saying to her, "You 3 X'd your salary, how are you broke", she said, and I quote, "My lifestyle 3 X'd" LOL. Anyway, lifestyle creep is a real thing and it can bite anyone not careful. I lost contact with her about 5 years ago so no update since then.
I have a co-worker who does this, borrowing and spending her way to oblivion. She bought tickets for all three Taylor Swift concerts and flew from New Zealand to Australia to watch them. Only two months after a three-week holiday in Europe. she orders Uber eats almost every work shift. It ridiculous. Then she constantly complains about the stress of paying her debt bills. Broke people really are idiots.
To an extent I am that way also, in my 40s, trends aren't a big focus for me. But something I find interesting is how some people (not to brag) can pull off a lot of trendy looks with carefully selected thrift and cheap stuff and just the occasional splurge. I love expressing myself with clothes and accessories but I never feel the need to buy every trend or the "best" brands, I usually splurge on some nicer things (like 2-3 items per year that cost between $100-300) and I wind up with the reputation of being very stylish, most of the time my dress cost $11
@@seltzermint5 I am glad you’ve found a way to express yourself that meets your financial needs! I have always had my own, artsy/colorful style, and started thrift shopping as a teen. I am a lot less focused on style and more focused on comfort now. Especially since I am no longer working a professional office job. I still wear bright colors, though!
We never had much to flaunt, lol, but when we did get raises or gifts we saved them instead of inflating our lifestyle. When all of our friends were upgrading from their "starter home" we stayed put. When they were buying huge, expensive new cars, we bought gently used and drove them forever. When you are truly happy with yourself, you never worry about how to "impress" others. Now that we are retiring this year (I'm 56, he's 58) everyone is flabbergasted! They either wonder how on earth we can do that, or they snicker that we are short-sighted and obviously going to have to live in poverty. We don't care what anyone thinks, lol, we did the math and we are really gonna enjoy traveling the world, giving to our adult children, and doing anything else we want to do! 😀
Nicely said. I never earned high incomes despite a solid higher education. I taught my kids to live modestly but well and to save up for rich experiences such as travel and the arts. I never aspired to impress anyone even though I live very comfortably. Wealth is so subjective in its illusions. Never try to impress or influence with fake wealth. Find what enriches your life and enjoy what you have!
You hit on the focus I've had all my life and that is FREEDOM. I started a business, not to get rich but, to control my time. It worked for most of the time. It's so nice to see someone as young as you to not get sucked into this keep up the Jones death spiral. I wish more younger people would adopt this mindset and live by the old saying that Eleanor Roosevelt said decades ago when she said. "What other people think of you is none of your business"
When I was in banking years ago I had a mortgage customer who sold high end cars, and while going over his credit report we got to talking (in the abstract sense) about the worst credit customers we’d ever had. His was a player on our local NFL team, and he stressed that this was a guy you saw on TV every single Sunday; a guy who undoubtedly made at least a few MILLION dollars a year. Still needed a loan to buy a car, bought the highest end fully loaded model of course, and took on a car payment of well over $2000 to do so!! You can burn thru any amount of money if you’re bound & determined to 🙄
I'm on track to having my house paid off by 40 (I actually have enough already with all my assets), and I just bought a one year old car with cash. You'd never know it by looking at me, nor do I tell anyone in my personal life or at work just how well I'm doing. It just breeds jealousy and I don't want to make myself a target.
So right on the (virtual) money Nicole! Just found your channel recently and am blown away by the wisdom you dispense here. I'm 65 (in a few weeks) and though I've never been wealthy in the commonly thought sence, I've done alright for myself financially in the past but never needed to impress anyone with "stuff." I'm now retired on SSDI (long story) and I've never been happier in my life - I'm a super "cheap date" though I can easily pay for both of us if necessary. I appreciate my freedom from the corporate juggernaut that grinds unsuspecting people up and spits them out with ooldles of debt. I owe nobody anything other than my rent and the very ordinary necessities of life. Wouldn't trade retired on disability for "all the tea in china".
Once we went for happy hour and I asked my coworkers what would they do if they suddenly inherited 1 million dollars? I got the dumbest answers! One would buy Rolex watches the other would buy Gucci bags! No one talked about paying off their bills or investing! Great video Nicole!
This is why rates should remain high. To discourage reckless spending and investments. And ENCOURAGE saving. I would however, require banks to provide 0%, 30-year loans to FIRST TIME buyers of SMALL starter homes. It's hard to be financially secure without an affordable home. The same with loans for cheap used cars. Let banks make their money off of people who can afford the upgrades. Luxury homes, cars, boats, etc. They can also boost production of small homes by giving tax breaks to builders and suppliers of building materials, for every new starter home they produce. Local governments should not tax those small homes either, after the initial loan is paid off. So there is no threat of losing your home when you get too old to work. There are solutions to problems. We are just not electing lawmakers who will implement them. The "news" networks promote the WRONG ones. They are a HUGE part of the problem.
'The things you own....end up owning you' said my kitties, their evil laughter fading as they went off to pursue their own interests, leaving me to wash their dishes & clean their boxes. ❤
Love your videos, Nicole. Shared. Wisdom, common sense, integrity....your grandmother was wise and correct. I thought about your words about suddenly getting "rich" and what we might do if we found ourselves with millions, what we would do first. I always thought like most....having mansions, fancy furnishings, tailor made Italian designer clothes & shoes, taking cruises & traveling, fancy cars...but NOW, because I'm 62, don't care about any of that. More junk, more costs in repairs, taxes, insurance, more to CLEAN (forget that), sometimes that just makes for MORE headaches. I like being comfortable in JJ's and sweats, the simpler life, more peace. Staying home, doing NOTHING!!! Good music, videos, movies, books, sleeping when tired, attention with pets, I like to eat too, but am content with what I have, not in competition with anyone or anything. Lots of FAKE people out there, and their fake wealth, so then they become political figures, while technically "grifting" for attention and funds. As we all see and know. Then they go into more criminal and illegal actions losing themselves. GREED, LUST & GLUTTONY are all deadly sins.
Very good video and advice. I grew up in a very wealthy town in the 1950s and 1960s. We were a blue collar family surrounded by wealthy people. We were there first, when the land was cheap. Most of the older neighbors were smart but there were some young ones who were fake wealthy. Almost all of the men were veterans and we got along well. When there were problems, we were the people that our neighbors turned too for help. My father built houses so he had tools to deal with emergencies. Then some new houses were built and some newly rich moved into the area. They thought that they were special and better than others. It seemed like it was the wives that were putting on airs the most. My brother had a lawn mowing route. When one of the newcomers tried to stiff him, all the neighbors shunned them and they lost store charging privileges from some of the businesses. Stiffing a kid was a sure sign that someone was not to be trusted. I saw it many times where the newly rich over extended and ended up going into bankruptcy. Many of them were stock brokers and all it took was a down turn in the market and they were short of money. Those people seemed to come and go every few years while we old timers just stayed. You are right about the fake wealth. It is kinda fun to watch these people who are full of themselves, destroy themselves. In German we call it schadenfreude(enjoying other's self inflicted pain). Good Luck, Rick
indeed, I was wondering too, if everybody realizes consumerism is keeping them poor and switch their lifestyles to minimalism, the system as we know it can't go on. It's a major paradigm shift. I often wondered how would such a world look like? Would the economy of goods shift towards an economy of experiences, perhaps, services, it's very interesting to think of it..
Yeah, when I see these people standing in line buying the latest toys I just think about their future garage sales and go, “Go ahead - buy my sh- for me.”
General rule of thumb, the more boastful people are about things, the more likely they are pretending. You see it all the time. The couple who are publically lovey dovey all the time on social media and then suddenly break up, for instance. I've come to assume that the more boastful you are the less genuinely happy you are with your life. That goes for financial matters as much as anything else. And with financial things you can really just apply logic. People don't get rich acquiring expensive habits.
I can definitely relate to this video. I was laid off during the pandemic, about a month in I had WAY more money in my account than normal. I went back and looked at how much my wife I I were spending going out to eat. Turns out than number was more than our mortgage. We had no idea. We also had lawn service and regular house cleaning. Experiencing this is what spurred us to begin to live well below our means. We sold that house in the city, moved to a much cheaper place in the mountains and my wife has already retired (14 years early) and I'll do so as well in a few years. As horrible of an experience as the pandemic was, it did cause a lot of people to look at life differently and make positive changes!
Good for you! I used to spend so much money on coffees and lunches out, I know in the grander scheme for most people it is not THAT big of an expense. But I can honestly say now I spend a similar amount on 4 week-long very fun vacations every year and eat weekday lunches at home, coffee out maybe 1-2 times a month. We do dine out at least 1 time every weekend but that's it. Friends of ours get takeout most nights and all weekend. Even if I was made of money I would get so sick of that.
Learning to do stuff yourself saves a ton of money over the years. Learning the difference between wants and needs is huge (and lost on many people). Yep, we made mistakes earlier in life, but pulled out heads out of our butts by the time we were in our 40s and still had time to correct course. There's money, and then there's wealth. These are related, but different things. Back in the 90s there was a book called The Millionaire Next Door. Highly recommend it for understanding wealth.
I just did a $250 small repair on a customers pool. They have 2 very nice cars, 700K+ house, and a massive motorhome. They could not afford it, so they are paying $50 a month for 5 months.
Long ago, I worked with a fellow who was married to a stay-at-home Mom. They didn't have a lot of excess cash, so she decided to go to work full time. They bought a new car for her, paid money for daycare, ate out more, etc. Shortly after she went to work outside the home, he said to me " We don't have any more money than we did before she went to work". He couldn't understand how this was possible. You really nailed it.
Yes! Thank you. This has always been my approach to life. If I ever won the lottery, for me, it's about FREEDOM. So I can live my life how I want and not be tied down to a stupid job. I'd still live a modest life. I know this because I grew up poor, and I don't see myself wanting mansions, yachts and million dollar cars. When I was younger, I read a really good book called "The Millionaire Next Door." It talks about the same thing.
I agreed with it all. I live in a tiny house and I worked hard to pay off my mortgage. Once paid off, I kept the same monthly frugal budget and put those same mortgage amount payments into MY savings/investments. The result is I'm retiring at the end of this month, well before what is average retirement age!!! I'm not retiring in financial luxury but with what has always been most important to me, time.
You're right. At its core, true wealth means you have more options. It can mean different things in different context. Options for health care is one example of this. A man I met in a discussion group mentioned this. He talked about, when he and his wife were living in Germany, she developed cancer. He said "If we'd been living in the US, we would still have gotten her treatment, but we would have lost the house."
It is all about having a budget. When I hit a certain income, I wanted someone to take care of the lawn and most but not everything outside (I still plant and trim the hedges myself and some other items). I swore to myself that I would use that time and go to the gym. And that is what I do. I traded that weekly chore for the gym which i go to religiously. That is a good splurge as it helped me lose 50lbs and keep it off.
One comment I hear is ‘As long as you are comfortable it doesn’t matter’. This was said to me after I mentioned to individual that I wouldn’t like living a home that large because the property taxes and utilities will be very expensive.
Knowing the value of something is missed by so many "consumers". They buy all this junk they have no use for but have to keep it because it cost so much. So they rent storage space that adds even more to the cost of the junk they don't need.
Maintain that 'look'! Don't you let anyone know that you have a fully-functional Toilet...that cycles perfectly and then fills it's own tank...waiting for the next use..(fancy!!!)
I was a SAHM, when I returned to work we continued to live off of just the one income like before. My income just went into the family savings. It came in handy when we decided to renovate our house. Was able to convert our family room into 2 bedrooms for our kids. Glad we were able to do that without adding more debt.
Holy SHIT! You just hit a GRAND SLAM with this video. Just when I started thinking is everybody fucked up? I stumbled on your videos. This old man loves you! Keep this common sense coming.
Hello Nicole, my name is Don, I love your channel, and I am one of your subscribers. I’ve watched several of your videos, and this is the first time I have commented. I will be 70 years old in December of this year. And I simply wanted to complement you at your young age your entrepreneurial life, and your wisdom and perspective on this life both amazes and inspires me I’m very proud of you. it’s truly refreshing to watch your videos. I’ve been an entrepreneur for several years so I can truly relate….. keep up the great work….
I had a "Jones' " experience in college. There were kids trying to buy NorthFace jackets, fancy shoes, go out every weekend, etc but we were in the same financial aid situation. 🙃 Heck I still get looked at sideways when I say I haven't changed the number I use to budget my expenses with in over 3 years. Even though my income has increased, i don't want to lose my future (financial) goals over things I genuinely don't care about.
Me too! Except my mortgage, which I paid off last year. That relief is somewhat offset by increases in taxes and insurance and domestic medical costs. With what remains I increased my 401K contribution and savings and emergency fund. Keeping everything within a realistic budget makes lots of things simpler.
I worked for a photographer in NYC years ago. The guy made a fortune, he owned a private plane and flew into work from Shelter Island. Yet, you’d never guess it. He dressed in the same clothes he had owned for years. He was extremely generous, but if you met him you’d never guess how much money he had. He came from humble beginnings, and he appreciated his good luck.
My best friend gave me a great piece of advice years ago. He said that whenever you're thinking of buying something ask yourself whether or not you're imagining yourself showing it to a friend or acquaintance. If so, then you're most likely not in need of the thing, you're either wanting something to intrigue them with or you're simply in need of some companionship, so don't buy it, just go and see your friend instead.
People who start to get more money don't really want many of the things they buy. They just want things other people can't afford. It's a combination of ego, and self-justification that working themselves to death 70 hours a week is worth it.
2:33 This exact thing happened to MC Hammer after his first album went platinum, he went and bought a 14 Million dollar house and a bunch of expensive cars.
I worked in the tech industry. There was some fake wealth there of course but mainly what you had were a lot of frugal people that drove 10 year old Toyotas, had typical middle class houses, bought almost nothing on credit - and were socking money away into investment accounts hand over fist.
I think the best way to raise your standard of living is to cut overheads by doing more for yourself, such as growing your own food, keeping a few chickens, and cooking from scratch. Making your own mayonnaise, for example, is easy and cheap. Nicole, you could easily plant a few fruit bushes, which are close to zero maintenance, in your back garden and freeze the surplus.
The billionaires I worked for had everything, not frugal at all. Private jets, opulent homes, trips, clothes, cars, you get the drift. I do know that it’s a pain in the rump dealing with that kind of wealth. I would never want the headache. Less is more, I agree. Just know the rich are still rich and the rest are pretending.
I've been saying this for years. People always live just outside of their means. I too lived that way for the first half of my adult life. I now live just at or a little under my means. Just make sure you pay off that credit card every month. That is the most important thing you can do to assure your financial freedom. Interest rates on credit cards is criminal.
You may have heard the saying: "Big hat, no cattle." This is another way of describing people who try so hard to look wealthy but are actually not rich at all. I decided long ago not to try and play that game because it just doesn't make sense.
I once had a Chinese girlfriend and the culture around money, income, and possessions was surprisingly transparent. The first thing Chinese people would ask you, as part of neutral small talk, is how much you make and what your current spending habits or hobbies are. Comparing salaries seems to utterly normal, and getting a zero-interest loan or the best all-you-can-eat carryout place is something of a pastime. My impression is that Chinese did not put all that much prestige on material wealth which is why it was small-talk, but having a college degree or, better yet, a scientific or medical degree, was what denoted prestige. There was keeping up with the Joneses but it was concentrated on the education of children and not so much on material wealth (real or fake).
When I got a better job the only thing I changed with the way I live is I bought the more expensive chocolate and the more expensive clothes. Nothing else changed so I managed to save a lot of money. I stopped buying expensive chocolate since I didn't enjoy it more but the clothing I really enjoy.
I wish I had found you when I was a young man. As sad as that is, I’m glad I still have time to learn and make changes before the grim reaper shows up. Keep sharing your wisdom.
I saw this a while ago when a friend asked to borrow money from me. I was shocked because we were both single men in our 20's but he earned about 25% more than me at the time. The difference was that he had the smartest clothes, the latest cellphone and the trendiest car. Meanwhile I had the down payment for my first house and was actively looking to purchase.
Good video as always. I personally feel it's very important not to flaunt wealth. It can quite often invite the wrong people into your life. Those who want nothing more than to take what you have and sometimes even feel they are entitled to it. Live simply and humble, and help those who need it when you can. It's a much more enriching life.
Nearly 99% of people couldn't live in their house or have the stuff they 'own' without being in debt or having credit cards. Whenever I see someone 'rich' looking I always think they've probably overstretched themselves or bought clothes on After Pay or at the very least just put it all on a credit card. I'm so happy my wife and I have no debt or loans, have never had any and we only ever pay for things if we have the money for them.
True. Two of my bff’s are so wealthy but no one can tell coz they’re laid back and chill. While I have to work overtime 10-12 hr shifts. They both paid car and home in cash in their early 20’s.
I wish I found Nicole's channel sooner, I'm learning a lot.This needed when I was in university which they should teach btw. I'm tired of keeping up with the trends etc😢 i need to take care of my finances so I can live my life instead of impressing others with frivolous nonsense that doesn't save me! People don't know how unhealthy is to live with debt, it's like mind prison.I need to be free while I'm still young and healthy.Thank you Nicole❤
Us with the big houses, swimming pool and multiple cars actually own it all. The difference is that we bought the house when the market was at its lowest circa 2011, all cars, trucks and suv were purchased pre pandemic. We don’t hire a house cleaner but those with house cleaner make way more money than normal with job stability. I in particular do not need a plumber, electrician or carpenter and a mechanic. Our older folks taught us how to fix cars or our house ourselves. Summer break is a great time to learn a trade. Nowadays, everything is on TH-cam which makes it even easier to do things like change a starter or install a stereo on vehicles.
great post.. very well done.. I just got my home loan down to 15 years on a refi, saved so much loot. your grandmother is/was wise.. my dad says similar stuff.. one of my sociology professors also spoke on this all the time.
One of the things that really amazes me is how many luxury cars there are on the road. The old classic budget says you shouldn't spend more than 10% of your take-home pay budget on transportation. I imagine that would include gas, insurance, maintenance and repairs. I would be shocked if more than 25% of luxury car buyers, or even regular car buyers, follow this guideline today.
I have spent a lot of effort and a decent amount of money on a large collection of costumes. I love having people look at me and smile and more so to ask to have a photo taken with me. Seeing others enjoy seeing me in my costumes brings me a great amount of joy. Now if you asked my siblings what they thought of my costumes they would say that I have wasted my money and time on them. My brother actually blocked me from my inheritance for many years because he thought that I was extremely financially irresponsible. This is the same brother who bought a condo that he could not afford without blowing his share of his part of our inheritance from our parents. I have yet to spend one single penny of my inheritance but have put it into a low fee S&P 500 index. Who is actually the one who has been financially responsible. Him who had to get a condo in a tall building just so he can feel rich or me who invested my inheritance and only spent want I was making at my job so I can have fun seeing others have fun.
Even a century ago they recognized the problem of lifestyle creep. If you read George Classon's book The richest man in Babylon, "Our necessary expenses will match our increase in pay unless we protest to the contrary".
Great video! I loved the point you made at 4:35 - "people are trying to keep up with the entire world" thanks to social media. It's been a huge shift. Those old enough to remember the early 2000's will recall that in the pre-social-media era, there were far fewer "real" celebrities compared with today. These days every 12 year old Tiktoker has their own lambo, mansion, clothing line and endorsement deal, making it seem like anyone and everyone can make it.
It's no point being very frugal the whole life and hoping one day retire living an abundance lifestyle. I have lost very close ones either from terminal illness or very suddenly before and after retirement, and it all started around age 50. They were all healthy people, no one knows what the future holds. For me, it's all about discipline and percentage. I am over 50s and earn good money, decide to indulge myself a little bit more while I still have the physical ability, health and active mind. I spend 10-15% of my income for restaurants, gadgets and nice clothes. Enjoys the PRESENT.
We know people who are both fake rich and real rich. I have no desire to be either. The fake rich seem to have it all and they love showing it off, but yet the wife is forced to work extra hours at a job she hates in an effort to help pay for it all. The truly rich have a live-in housekeeper, a driver, three huge homes and vacation in Spain and Italy on a whim in a private jet. They have also hired an interior designer and gave them free rein. The result is a home that looks like a museum, it doesn't reflect the tastes of the people who own the home. They show it off also, but I don't think they have a choice. I DO know they have a lot of "friends" because the wife is always paying for things for them. For example, she paid for someone's in ground pool, college and various vacations. It makes me wonder if they would be friends otherwise. I'm not against money, believe me, but I take joy and pride into saving up for things, decorating my own home and being selective in what I buy. When you can get whatever you want whenever you want, it seems to take the joy out of it.
I know what you mean about both real rich and fake rich, totally agree. Sometimes I think the best kept secret in life is all the people who have good income and savings/investments but live like lower to middle class in their day to day - stealth wealth!
People thought we were ballers for about 4 years after filing bankruptcy. We ended up renting a very nice 3600 square foot house with a view at about half the market rate. (Landlords were more interested in tenants that would treat it like their own home than renters, as they intended to occupy it later.) We bought next to nothing during that time while we kept our debt near zero. It was absurd, and we didn't even furnish 1/3 of the place. Friends still thought we were rich though!. LOL That allowed us to purchase a much more modest home of less than half the size with no view when we finally did leave.
I love Mint. It’s flawless. Switched from Verizon and I’m not going back.
Used mint mobile for over 5 years. Love it! And I use the $15/month tier. 5G/month data is more than enough for me.
@@morriselee and I got a personal Christmas card from Ryan Reynolds. Customer for life.
There's a saying: rich is loud, wealth is silent.
Nice 😊
The variation I had heard was "rich shouts, while wealth whispers."
Accurate.
@@Insightfill”Money talks while wealth whispers.”
@n01YES! I think that was it! I had remembered the alliteration of "wealth whispers" but couldn't remember if the other was "money" or "rich", or what it ended up doing. "Money talks" on its own is already an expression, so I think the combo works well together.
As my family likes to say, “I don’t own shit, but the shit that I own is paid for.” lol.
I own all the shit in my lower intestine.
me too, but nobody cares. They'll hate you for it, especially women. That's what I've figured out.
So you own something
@@raymond_sycamore😅❤❤😅
That just makes no fucken sense
Debt free is real FREEDOM. Absolutely 👍
Hell yes. My wife and I never got in the habit of living beyond our means. We have decent incomes and we buy silly things sometimes, but cash only, never on credit, and never on impulse either. And we buy stuff for ourselves, not for the neighbors. One thing I found it is that not worrying overly much about the everyday purchases you make at the supermarket or at Starbucks or whatever, can be an expensive luxury. It's a luxury I can afford and I am willing to pay for, within reason, but that's been a conscious choice.
We did have to get a mortgage for our home. The feeling of freedom we got when we finally paid it off is indescribable.
"Debt slavery" is real.
Most definitely ..
Bob Dylan once said a successful person is someone who gets up and does what they want to do.
Amen to that.
The Sun, good friends, pets, laughter and a home cooked meal are the greatest things ever. ❤
🥰🥰🥰
yup love cooking at home because you actually know whats in it.
and the "Tuxedo cake" at Costco...yum!! 😊
💯
This epidemic is so acceptable in the US and despite so many drowning in debt, they still do it
There used to be a sense of shame associated with such things as gluttony, debt, divorce, envy and wastefulness. Now shamelessness is a virtue.
Not divorce, see the fairytale Bluebeard. Even Jesus DECREED divorce in cases like adultery.
I’d rather have a cheap purse with money in it than an expensive purse with nothing in it
Tyler Durden - 'Bob had bitch tits'... that quote speaks volumes.
Saw a short where the same sentiment was expressed: rather have a plastic bag with $5000 in it than a $4900 designer bag with $100. The latter is faux rich, that bag will prob get $200 on resale (last year’s fashion). The former is as the content creator says is freedom from knowing next month’s rent/mortgage, utilities and food can be paid or a dental emergency isn’t a crisis.
hahahahahaha
👍❗️😊
Good 👍 one
I see this all the time. My parents were that way in the 80s, they seemed rich and when they got a divorce they both had to downgrade every aspect of their lives. While I never had to go without essentials it was a lesson.
I remember working with someone who had a big fancy house and 2 BMWs and she was crying about a $700 car repair and had a yard sale to try and get some extra money. I was sitting there with my small old house and Kia thinking "what? I would have NO problem with that car repair". I was 29 or 30, and she was closer to 40 at the time. AND she had a kid! It was eye opening!
Yep, the news is always saying how a majority of Americans don't have even a few hundred dollars in a savings account to cover an emergency expense. That is just mind blowing to me.
Just think about their base credit interest rate on top of that. It was in the tens back then.
The book the millionaire next door talks all about this : )
It tells us Don't have kids !! Your life will always be a struggle !!
@@nancie7487Sorry, but not true. We have kids, a paid off house, no debt and our net worth is over $1 million…and we’re still in our 30s. Seeing us on the street, you’d never know it though. We drive older used vehicles, we live in a very modest house and we never try to keep up with others. Our goal was always to have a paid off home and to be secure, so we made the necessary financial decisions all along the way to get there.
I’m frugal because I feel I’m getting screwed on everything I buy
One of the best comments on here.... I'm frugal also because I don't buy things that show less quality and value than what I apply to earn the money to pay them. I have realized that bad products and service is the BEST way for me to save,... because I don't buy that crap.
Same. Hate feeling like I'm getting ripped off
I agree! This has become more apparent as products are been made with cheaper materials more than ever. I feel ripped of at a dealership, jeweler, furniture shop, grocery store let’s not forget clothing shops. Furnitures being made of plastic materials selling at wood prices are the worse of them all!
Yep. Protesting by not buying.
Great comment and I feel the same.
Right on Nicole. One of the best books I've ever read was 'The Millionaire Next Door". People who act rich are referred to as "big hat, no cattle."
Actually “All hat, no cattle.”
That and the follow up book, "Stop Acting Rich", both are great books.
The book is about 20 years old. One of the best books I've ever read (and owned). If you only read one book this year read - The Millionaire Next Door. Still available on Amazon.....
tbh that book was so boring and repetitive. good idea, but I do not love that dude
@@Thomas63r2 The quote I refer to in the book I mentioned is correct; but thanks for attempting to correct me.
I often remember this Sublime quote that lead singer wore on his t-shirt. "Poor, ugly, happy". I got teased a lot by family and friends and when I was in 3rd and 4th grade we were really poor. ..but I remember some of those times as the best. I also remember that when I got treated really bad in higher grades I would go off by myself and those are the times I felt I got to know myself and connect with something deeper that was so amazing I felt my spirit fly free and I felt so happy inside. I value that more than anything.
My experience was similar. Even as a child I innately understood that trying to "fit in" was a losing game. The rules were always changing.
I’m 58 now….and love my alone time. It’s priceless
I bought an older house, upgraded the attic insulation, insulated the basement walls and made sure the roof was always in good shape. No other major upgrades. Kitchen is old but everything works, original hardwood floors still in place and the bathroom still has the original layout. If things work, I don't upgrade to impress people. Also drive used cars until they are not worth repairing.
House was paid off before I was forty and I was able to retire at age 58 when I was laid off.
Thanks for sharing ❤
Having a paid house is life changing! My story is similar to your, i worked on my house over the years to better it and i'm getting close! Older house are sometime made better and less cheaply than brand new one: it is time tested, mine is from 1959 and is quite charming and modern now, i love it!
Exactly! On a call in show I listen to someone called in that was making $750,000 a year and they were living paycheck to paycheck. Could barely pay their bills, had zero in savings and nothing saved for retirement. They were in their late 40’s, maybe early 50’s. I was shocked! In all my working life I’d only made over $100,000 a year once, and that year I worked so much overtime I was exhausted. I can’t even imagine “ not being able to make it “ as these people said, on $750,000 a year! What a big waste of money!
Was it Dave Ramsay's show? It's crazy how many calls he gets with stories like that. Sorry, but I have zero sympathy for someone making six figures that claims they can't save any money. They are doing something wrong and don't want to live below their means. Even if I won the lottery tomorrow I'd buy a very modest house because I simply don't need nor want a huge home.
@@PositivelyPam Yes. It was Dave Ramsey. I find his principals useful, but I’m not a fanatic about them. Yes, I had very little empathy for them. So many people have incomes below, or way below $100,000 yet they manage to pay their bills and save for retirement. He pretty much told this caller to buck up, figure it out and be grateful they had so much income.
I have zero sympathy for people like that. They are obviously massively insecure and like to pose in front of other massively insecure people. I could so much with a $750K salary. It would just take me one year of that salary and I'd have all my bills paid, I'd buy a house with a decent deposit and I'd have heaps of cash to stash away for a rainy day fund. Plus, I'd be able to upgrade my old car to something mid range and reliable and buy new furniture for the new house. Some people just don't deserve to be wealthy.
It is also in New Paper articles every so often. "Living paycheck to paycheck while earning $500,000 a year." It is amazing how the can not save money while having difficulty paying for private preschool while also paying the nanny to take care of the kids. It is interesting what they spend money on, while remaining broke.
For many families, automatically putting money away for investments or saving is not a thing. They didn't grow up with the concept. So, they didn't start their working lives knowing it.
When they finally realize that they should save and invest a portion of their income, either their fixed costs are too high, because they didn't understand any of the key numbers, or they think savings is pinching cents instead of automatically putting money aside.
Well stated, Nicole. I am 73. You are reinforcing many of the ideas and practices that have assisted me over the years! Thank you.
During the Covid times I worked as a security guard for high end gated communities. What shocked me about my situation were the large amount of Ubers, Lyfts, Post Mates, and Door Dash deliveries that were done with luxury sports cars. It got to the point where I asked a guy driving a corvette for a delivery why he was doing post mates. He gave me a straight look and said he had to come up with an extra 2k a month or he would lose his car. I then asked that same question to each of the Luxury deliveries and the response were all the same. I think there is an old saying that the emperor has no clothes which tends to be the case for the fake rich.
I worked a minimum wage job with teenagers during covid; it was alarming how many of them were lining up to buy new cars or buy used higher end models. A 19 year old girl I worked with financed a used Audi. An AUDI. We worked in delivery. We only had 2 delivery vehicles and the third person had to use their personal car. She definitely took the Audi on several deliveries. Later she had to quit due to health reasons. Who knows if she kept up with the payments on that car.
I had a home improvement business for years. The first thing you learn is the bigger the house, the less they pay. They are always out of money and want to "settle" the bill for a fraction of the agreed amount (without going to court). It's been said that a broke person will spend all their money trying to look wealthy and a wealthy person always says they are broke.
I believe it… as a lawyer and someone who lives in a modest home. When we eventually renovate our 1983 1,100 sq foot home it will be a beautiful redesign. We may end up building a new home one day or we will do an addition to this home bc it is very quaint and we have half an acre for our garden, a little orchard (some suburban homesteading) so it may be more trouble moving than it’s worth. I think it’s the mentality to for the contractor… I appreciate any skills and talents that help me do what I want and will pay well for it! Bc I hope people do the same for me. That reciprocity is lacking in people.
I did roofing and gutters for 15 years. I got a good glimpse at who really has wealth and who doesn't and the wealthy people aren't always the ones in the gated neighborhoods with $800K houses.
Luckily, we only ever got stiffed by one customer. He was a Haitian and a POS human being building a huge house. We almost fought his entire family in the front yard one day. All of us roofers and the shingle delivery driver vs his hood rat family, women and all. He tried to steal the delivery truck and drive away in it when we confiscated the materials he refused to pay for. I don't know if you know any shingle truck drivers, but you do not want to mess with these dudes. They sling 400 bundles of shingles 2-3 times a day. The driver was ready to tear him in half.
We ended up putting a lien on his house and abandoning the job. This guy paid cash for his house so its not like he didn't have the money. He was just your typical hood rat scammer Haitian. We would get his tax records in the mail b/c we had a lien on the property and he was always delinquent on his taxes every year. Its not the only job we almost got in a fight over, but it is the only job we ever had the cops called on us and the only job we had to put a lien on. Other than that, the wealthy people I've worked for have been the nicest and kindest people I've ever met.
yeah this is why America needs debtor's prisons .... NEEDS
A few years back there was an elderly lady that always sat next to me in church. When she passed she left 250,000 to the church, $250,000 to the library, $250,000 to a small town museum, and $250,000 to her neices and nephew.
Ironically, that same week my husband told me of a lady at work( that always drove the newest BMW). She was being investigated for skimming money from the PTO at her children’s school ( where she was the treasurer). Drives me crazy when one of my good friends always judges people by what they wear or drive!
That’s the difference between leaving a beautiful legacy and being a leech 😂
Local woman is being charged with fraud and theft. She took over 600k from her job over 8 year period. Now i know how they afforded that huge house, brand new vehicles, big boat, all the toys.
@@redrustyhill2 I know a woman who did this. She skimmed money from her job for years. She's going to prison.
She should've left it all to family.
@@seabreeze4559 She might not have family, or she has a good reason not to leave them anything.
I forget where I heard this but I always remember it:
“The people who look rich usually aren’t”.
In our household, we pay cash for our cars. And I am reminded of a time I was criticized by relatives for not buying something newer and “safer”. Putting aside that all cars break down, and it’s not “if”-it’s “when”, don’t ever let anyone try to pull you down for being financially responsible, especially over something that doesn’t matter very much to you.
Ramit Sehti, a popular personal finance guru in the US is a very wealthy man. Yet he owns no real estate and drives an old Honda accord. Why? It doesn’t matter to him and building his wealth is more important to him than wasting resources on impressing other people.
Live YOUR RICH LIFE 😊
The old Honda Accord is cool but at the same time if you enjoy something, say cars for example, spend money on a fun car in a smart way. Get that old corvette.
Hondas just keep going
I had the luxury of growing up in a fairly affluent suburb. Quite literally, we had "heads" of industry living in close proximity to us. Our neighbour, two doors up ran a manufacturing firm with 400 employees on the shop floor, at one stage. Our neighbour over the back fence had a similar number employed in a commercial air conditioning business.
Around the corner, another neighbour ran a very successful yacht fittings factory. In between, there were quite a few "work a day types" that didn't present much differently to the captains of industry. Yeah, the "rich" guys had nicer houses, but not to extremes. Actually, now that I think about it, one lived in a very modest house. His vice was a new Jaguar every two years. His wife drove a Toyota!
Then the '80's came along and the "new" money (no money!) came in. Flash houses went up, there were Mercs front and centre in the driveways, boats in the garages, gardeners, pool cleaners and this that and the other thing coming and going all day.
Then the recession hit. The captains of industry remained. The "work a day" types remained, but banks put up mortgagee boards on the shiny houses, with the boats and the Mercedes and the swimming pool in the back yard. As a young man, it was indeed a lesson. You can't judge a book by its cover.
Money whispers. Debt screams.
Very interesting. What do you mean by work a day types?what was their line of work?
@@abhinavdeepsinha3036 By "work a day types", I mean those on modest salaries or wages. Lines of work varied from sales reps. to project managers, doctors, lawyers and everything in between.
@@davidbrayshaw3529 thank you
This video should be played in high school personal finance classes.
Very few high schools have personal finance classes 🤷♀️
Can’t keep the economy of student loans afloat if you teach kids finance 101.
@@AccordingtoNicole OUCH... Yessss!
There is no financial class, the system wants you un educated and in debt
@@AccordingtoNicole WORD
"Fake Rich" is an excellent term. Please keep up the wonderful work!
"The things you own, end up owning you" is a rephrase of Thomas Merton's original proposition that, "The more things you own, the more things own you."
I once heard someone say: "home ownership: the house owns you."
Of home ownership, and pointing to the front door, I've heard, "This is my new house," and then gesturing towards all the major rooms and spaces, "and this part is the bank's new house."
@@ioelisdf The Onion once had an article where they had an interview with a man who just bought a home. But everywhere they could, they had put in "(the bank's)" or something similar. "Just think of all of the fun my children are going to have in (my bank's) brand new pool!"
Having been frugal and a saver for many years, we were able to retire very comfortably. Now we can afford to spend freely.
But you won't spend freely, That is no longer in your DNA. You spend wisely....
I remember one of my colleagues, a young guy who was thinking about selling his apartment gifted by his parents, to buy a new fancy Mercedes... Some people just live in their own imaginary worlds 😅 And those of us who didn't have wealthy parents had faces like😵💫
My sister in law is homeless now because she couldn’t pay for a bank loan she asked for to go play bingo. 🤦🏼♀️
What an idiot.
That's just dumb. I don't know why people live Mercedes. Its over-engineered German scheisse. Anyone who prioritizes a vehicle over a domicile has a room temperature IQ.
We have no mortgage on our 8 yr old home that we had built. Both our vehicles were paid in cash, because interest charges is money out the door. We have a good income, invest, and nothing extravagant. It’s a very comfortable life, and our neighbours have no idea how well financially we are off.
Spend within your means, and build on your savings.👍🇨🇦
I'm 66 and all I have to say " from mouths of babes comes wisdom!!" You are so right !!❤🎉❤🎉❤🎉❤
Sounds like a reference to Psalm 8:2 -- "Out of the mouth of babes and nursing infants You have ordained strength,"
You really touch on a big problem! People are not living within (or below) their means anymore.
My favorite Rapper blew away millions. My uncles favorite NBA star had 70 millions and is now broke. Your frugality is a necessity.
If I won the lottery rn we would stay in our 1,100 sq foot 1983 home, at least for now. We don’t need or want anything else at the moment. But the difference is it would be paid off and we would be free to do what we wanted.
You don't have to be frugal -- just be mindful about your spending and have a spending plan. e.g. 25% on rent/mortgage, 25% of basic living expenses (utilities/groceries/transport), 25% on retirement savings, and 25% saved and invested (you can decide if that 25% is saving towards your next new car, overseas trip, kids college, or for building up an investment portfolio to eventually become 'financially independent'). The problem is when people think 100% of their pay can be spent on anything they want, and don't even bother tracking where their money is going, let alone make a conscious decision about what they want to spend their income on.
ps. If your income is very low, then yes, you will have to be frugal -- but a lot of people earn decent money and still end up with debt and no NW after years or decades of working.
You mean crapper.
Plenty of artists and athletes the public loves but shouldn't because of their personal choices.
you can live like a price forever or like a king for a few years
Back in the early 90s, when I started jr high, a bunch of my city's schools were combined. It was so interesting to see the "real" rich kids vs. the wannabes from my part of town. The real rich kids were TOTALLY different from the super popular kids whose parents were fake rich.
How were they different?
I had a friend that I helped negotiate her salary for a new job about 10 years ago (much more responsibility and sales role to boot). She went from $29,000 a year to $100,000 ($72K base plus at least $28K for commission probably more). She stayed in her apartment that she had when she was making $29K and kept her same car, yet after 3 years when that job came to an end she was broke. I remember saying to her, "You 3 X'd your salary, how are you broke", she said, and I quote, "My lifestyle 3 X'd" LOL. Anyway, lifestyle creep is a real thing and it can bite anyone not careful. I lost contact with her about 5 years ago so no update since then.
I have a co-worker who does this, borrowing and spending her way to oblivion. She bought tickets for all three Taylor Swift concerts and flew from New Zealand to Australia to watch them. Only two months after a three-week holiday in Europe. she orders Uber eats almost every work shift. It ridiculous. Then she constantly complains about the stress of paying her debt bills. Broke people really are idiots.
Life is so much better being ignorant of trends. Don’t care = won’t buy it. I am 65 and so glad to be past that forever adolescent phase in my life.
To an extent I am that way also, in my 40s, trends aren't a big focus for me. But something I find interesting is how some people (not to brag) can pull off a lot of trendy looks with carefully selected thrift and cheap stuff and just the occasional splurge. I love expressing myself with clothes and accessories but I never feel the need to buy every trend or the "best" brands, I usually splurge on some nicer things (like 2-3 items per year that cost between $100-300) and I wind up with the reputation of being very stylish, most of the time my dress cost $11
@@seltzermint5 I am glad you’ve found a way to express yourself that meets your financial needs! I have always had my own, artsy/colorful style, and started thrift shopping as a teen. I am a lot less focused on style and more focused on comfort now. Especially since I am no longer working a professional office job. I still wear bright colors, though!
We never had much to flaunt, lol, but when we did get raises or gifts we saved them instead of inflating our lifestyle. When all of our friends were upgrading from their "starter home" we stayed put. When they were buying huge, expensive new cars, we bought gently used and drove them forever. When you are truly happy with yourself, you never worry about how to "impress" others.
Now that we are retiring this year (I'm 56, he's 58) everyone is flabbergasted! They either wonder how on earth we can do that, or they snicker that we are short-sighted and obviously going to have to live in poverty. We don't care what anyone thinks, lol, we did the math and we are really gonna enjoy traveling the world, giving to our adult children, and doing anything else we want to do! 😀
When I notice people apparently living the high life- I call it conspicuous display of debt.
nice. I'm going to pinch that. :D
Nicely said. I never earned high incomes despite a solid higher education. I taught my kids to live modestly but well and to save up for rich experiences such as travel and the arts. I never aspired to impress anyone even though I live very comfortably. Wealth is so subjective in its illusions. Never try to impress or influence with fake wealth. Find what enriches your life and enjoy what you have!
You hit on the focus I've had all my life and that is FREEDOM. I started a business, not to get rich but, to control my time. It worked for most of the time. It's so nice to see someone as young as you to not get sucked into this keep up the Jones death spiral. I wish more younger people would adopt this mindset and live by the old saying that Eleanor Roosevelt said decades ago when she said. "What other people think of you is none of your business"
When I was in banking years ago I had a mortgage customer who sold high end cars, and while going over his credit report we got to talking (in the abstract sense) about the worst credit customers we’d ever had. His was a player on our local NFL team, and he stressed that this was a guy you saw on TV every single Sunday; a guy who undoubtedly made at least a few MILLION dollars a year. Still needed a loan to buy a car, bought the highest end fully loaded model of course, and took on a car payment of well over $2000 to do so!! You can burn thru any amount of money if you’re bound & determined to 🙄
I'm on track to having my house paid off by 40 (I actually have enough already with all my assets), and I just bought a one year old car with cash. You'd never know it by looking at me, nor do I tell anyone in my personal life or at work just how well I'm doing. It just breeds jealousy and I don't want to make myself a target.
So right on the (virtual) money Nicole! Just found your channel recently and am blown away by the wisdom you dispense here. I'm 65 (in a few weeks) and though I've never been wealthy in the commonly thought sence, I've done alright for myself financially in the past but never needed to impress anyone with "stuff." I'm now retired on SSDI (long story) and I've never been happier in my life - I'm a super "cheap date" though I can easily pay for both of us if necessary. I appreciate my freedom from the corporate juggernaut that grinds unsuspecting people up and spits them out with ooldles of debt. I owe nobody anything other than my rent and the very ordinary necessities of life. Wouldn't trade retired on disability for "all the tea in china".
I love spending my money. But I love saving it more. I dont care one iota for fake celebrities. To me they are utterly insignificant.
Once we went for happy hour and I asked my coworkers what would they do if they suddenly inherited 1 million dollars? I got the dumbest answers! One would buy Rolex watches the other would buy Gucci bags! No one talked about paying off their bills or investing! Great video Nicole!
But but but… how would anyone know they got a million dollars if they didn’t buy a bunch of useless crap?
I see this on a smaller scale when we get annual bonuses at work.
😂😂😂@@AccordingtoNicole
Yes that money is already spent before they get it : )@@seltzermint5
That's INSANE!!!!
This is why rates should remain high. To discourage reckless spending and investments. And ENCOURAGE saving. I would however, require banks to provide 0%, 30-year loans to FIRST TIME buyers of SMALL starter homes. It's hard to be financially secure without an affordable home. The same with loans for cheap used cars. Let banks make their money off of people who can afford the upgrades. Luxury homes, cars, boats, etc. They can also boost production of small homes by giving tax breaks to builders and suppliers of building materials, for every new starter home they produce. Local governments should not tax those small homes either, after the initial loan is paid off. So there is no threat of losing your home when you get too old to work. There are solutions to problems. We are just not electing lawmakers who will implement them. The "news" networks promote the WRONG ones. They are a HUGE part of the problem.
Stupid way of thinking...
Yep
no free rides
'The things you own....end up owning you' said my kitties, their evil laughter fading as they went off to pursue their own interests, leaving me to wash their dishes & clean their boxes.
❤
Love your videos, Nicole. Shared. Wisdom, common sense, integrity....your grandmother was wise and correct.
I thought about your words about suddenly getting "rich" and what we might do if we found ourselves with millions, what we would do first.
I always thought like most....having mansions, fancy furnishings, tailor made Italian designer clothes & shoes, taking cruises & traveling, fancy cars...but NOW, because I'm 62, don't care about any of that. More junk, more costs in repairs, taxes, insurance, more to CLEAN (forget that), sometimes that just makes for MORE headaches. I like being comfortable in JJ's and sweats, the simpler life, more peace. Staying home, doing NOTHING!!! Good music, videos, movies, books, sleeping when tired, attention with pets, I like to eat too, but am content with what I have, not in competition with anyone or anything. Lots of FAKE people out there, and their fake wealth, so then they become political figures, while technically "grifting" for attention and funds. As we all see and know. Then they go into more criminal and illegal actions losing themselves. GREED, LUST & GLUTTONY are all deadly sins.
Very good video and advice. I grew up in a very wealthy town in the 1950s and 1960s. We were a blue collar family surrounded by wealthy people. We were there first, when the land was cheap. Most of the older neighbors were smart but there were some young ones who were fake wealthy. Almost all of the men were veterans and we got along well. When there were problems, we were the people that our neighbors turned too for help. My father built houses so he had tools to deal with emergencies.
Then some new houses were built and some newly rich moved into the area. They thought that they were special and better than others. It seemed like it was the wives that were putting on airs the most.
My brother had a lawn mowing route. When one of the newcomers tried to stiff him, all the neighbors shunned them and they lost store charging privileges from some of the businesses. Stiffing a kid was a sure sign that someone was not to be trusted.
I saw it many times where the newly rich over extended and ended up going into bankruptcy. Many of them were stock brokers and all it took was a down turn in the market and they were short of money. Those people seemed to come and go every few years while we old timers just stayed.
You are right about the fake wealth. It is kinda fun to watch these people who are full of themselves, destroy themselves. In German we call it schadenfreude(enjoying other's self inflicted pain). Good Luck, Rick
But Nicole we need these type of people, that is what makes this world go round and round.
Nope, no, and nup.
they definitely have some sweet garage sales and thrift store donations.
indeed, I was wondering too, if everybody realizes consumerism is keeping them poor and switch their lifestyles to minimalism, the system as we know it can't go on. It's a major paradigm shift. I often wondered how would such a world look like? Would the economy of goods shift towards an economy of experiences, perhaps, services, it's very interesting to think of it..
Makes the economy go round, I guess 🫤
Yeah, when I see these people standing in line buying the latest toys I just think about their future garage sales and go, “Go ahead - buy my sh- for me.”
General rule of thumb, the more boastful people are about things, the more likely they are pretending. You see it all the time. The couple who are publically lovey dovey all the time on social media and then suddenly break up, for instance. I've come to assume that the more boastful you are the less genuinely happy you are with your life. That goes for financial matters as much as anything else. And with financial things you can really just apply logic. People don't get rich acquiring expensive habits.
I can definitely relate to this video. I was laid off during the pandemic, about a month in I had WAY more money in my account than normal. I went back and looked at how much my wife I I were spending going out to eat. Turns out than number was more than our mortgage. We had no idea. We also had lawn service and regular house cleaning. Experiencing this is what spurred us to begin to live well below our means. We sold that house in the city, moved to a much cheaper place in the mountains and my wife has already retired (14 years early) and I'll do so as well in a few years. As horrible of an experience as the pandemic was, it did cause a lot of people to look at life differently and make positive changes!
Good for you! I used to spend so much money on coffees and lunches out, I know in the grander scheme for most people it is not THAT big of an expense. But I can honestly say now I spend a similar amount on 4 week-long very fun vacations every year and eat weekday lunches at home, coffee out maybe 1-2 times a month. We do dine out at least 1 time every weekend but that's it. Friends of ours get takeout most nights and all weekend. Even if I was made of money I would get so sick of that.
Learning to do stuff yourself saves a ton of money over the years. Learning the difference between wants and needs is huge (and lost on many people). Yep, we made mistakes earlier in life, but pulled out heads out of our butts by the time we were in our 40s and still had time to correct course.
There's money, and then there's wealth. These are related, but different things. Back in the 90s there was a book called The Millionaire Next Door. Highly recommend it for understanding wealth.
Only pennies a day soon adds up to no pennies.
I just did a $250 small repair on a customers pool. They have 2 very nice cars, 700K+ house, and a massive motorhome. They could not afford it, so they are paying $50 a month for 5 months.
Long ago, I worked with a fellow who was married to a stay-at-home Mom. They didn't have a lot of excess cash, so she decided to go to work full time. They bought a new car for her, paid money for daycare, ate out more, etc. Shortly after she went to work outside the home, he said to me " We don't have any more money than we did before she went to work". He couldn't understand how this was possible. You really nailed it.
Yes! Thank you. This has always been my approach to life. If I ever won the lottery, for me, it's about FREEDOM. So I can live my life how I want and not be tied down to a stupid job. I'd still live a modest life. I know this because I grew up poor, and I don't see myself wanting mansions, yachts and million dollar cars. When I was younger, I read a really good book called "The Millionaire Next Door." It talks about the same thing.
I agreed with it all. I live in a tiny house and I worked hard to pay off my mortgage. Once paid off, I kept the same monthly frugal budget and put those same mortgage amount payments into MY savings/investments. The result is I'm retiring at the end of this month, well before what is average retirement age!!! I'm not retiring in financial luxury but with what has always been most important to me, time.
You're right. At its core, true wealth means you have more options. It can mean different things in different context. Options for health care is one example of this. A man I met in a discussion group mentioned this. He talked about, when he and his wife were living in Germany, she developed cancer. He said "If we'd been living in the US, we would still have gotten her treatment, but we would have lost the house."
It is all about having a budget. When I hit a certain income, I wanted someone to take care of the lawn and most but not everything outside (I still plant and trim the hedges myself and some other items). I swore to myself that I would use that time and go to the gym. And that is what I do. I traded that weekly chore for the gym which i go to religiously. That is a good splurge as it helped me lose 50lbs and keep it off.
The more you spend, the more problems you get! Use money to buy freedom instead of stuff.
One comment I hear is ‘As long as you are comfortable it doesn’t matter’. This was said to me after I mentioned to individual that I wouldn’t like living a home that large because the property taxes and utilities will be very expensive.
Knowing the value of something is missed by so many "consumers". They buy all this junk they have no use for but have to keep it because it cost so much. So they rent storage space that adds even more to the cost of the junk they don't need.
I love looking like I don’t have a pot to piss in. 😆😁
I honestly think some of the people where I bank are puzzled by my car.
I look that way too, but I don't love it,
mostly because I actually don't have a pot to piss in 😂
I'd much rather have a pot to piss in than not
Maintain that 'look'! Don't you let anyone know that you have a fully-functional Toilet...that cycles perfectly and then fills it's own tank...waiting for the next use..(fancy!!!)
@@lilblackduc7312- 😆😆
People often don’t know nor consider that once you build wealth it takes equally if not more time and energy to maintain and keep it!
That hasn’t been my experience. Why do you think that?
I was a SAHM, when I returned to work we continued to live off of just the one income like before. My income just went into the family savings. It came in handy when we decided to renovate our house. Was able to convert our family room into 2 bedrooms for our kids. Glad we were able to do that without adding more debt.
Holy SHIT! You just hit a GRAND SLAM with this video. Just when I started thinking is everybody fucked up? I stumbled on your videos. This old man loves you! Keep this common sense coming.
"Mo money, mo problems" is only said by those who don't know how to manage their finances. It was never said by those who do.
Hello Nicole, my name is Don, I love your channel, and I am one of your subscribers. I’ve watched several of your videos, and this is the first time I have commented. I will be 70 years old in December of this year. And I simply wanted to complement you at your young age your entrepreneurial life, and your wisdom and perspective on this life both amazes and inspires me I’m very proud of you. it’s truly refreshing to watch your videos. I’ve been an entrepreneur for several years so I can truly relate….. keep up the great work….
I had a "Jones' " experience in college. There were kids trying to buy NorthFace jackets, fancy shoes, go out every weekend, etc but we were in the same financial aid situation. 🙃
Heck I still get looked at sideways when I say I haven't changed the number I use to budget my expenses with in over 3 years. Even though my income has increased, i don't want to lose my future (financial) goals over things I genuinely don't care about.
Me too! Except my mortgage, which I paid off last year. That relief is somewhat offset by increases in taxes and insurance and domestic medical costs. With what remains I increased my 401K contribution and savings and emergency fund. Keeping everything within a realistic budget makes lots of things simpler.
I worked for a photographer in NYC years ago. The guy made a fortune, he owned a private plane and flew into work from Shelter Island. Yet, you’d never guess it. He dressed in the same clothes he had owned for years. He was extremely generous, but if you met him you’d never guess how much money he had. He came from humble beginnings, and he appreciated his good luck.
My best friend gave me a great piece of advice years ago. He said that whenever you're thinking of buying something ask yourself whether or not you're imagining yourself showing it to a friend or acquaintance. If so, then you're most likely not in need of the thing, you're either wanting something to intrigue them with or you're simply in need of some companionship, so don't buy it, just go and see your friend instead.
People who start to get more money don't really want many of the things they buy. They just want things other people can't afford. It's a combination of ego, and self-justification that working themselves to death 70 hours a week is worth it.
2:33 This exact thing happened to MC Hammer after his first album went platinum, he went and bought a 14 Million dollar house and a bunch of expensive cars.
Thanks!
I worked in the tech industry. There was some fake wealth there of course but mainly what you had were a lot of frugal people that drove 10 year old Toyotas, had typical middle class houses, bought almost nothing on credit - and were socking money away into investment accounts hand over fist.
I think the best way to raise your standard of living is to cut overheads by doing more for yourself, such as growing your own food, keeping a few chickens, and cooking from scratch. Making your own mayonnaise, for example, is easy and cheap. Nicole, you could easily plant a few fruit bushes, which are close to zero maintenance, in your back garden and freeze the surplus.
I’m perfectly fine buying fruit from the grocery store. I don’t drive a BMW so I can pay for raspberries in cash 🤣
@@AccordingtoNicole Fair enough!
Everything you say makes perfect sense! I have a few wealthy friends, but you would never know it because they are genuine down to earth nice people.
The billionaires I worked for had everything, not frugal at all. Private jets, opulent homes, trips, clothes, cars, you get the drift. I do know that it’s a pain in the rump dealing with that kind of wealth. I would never want the headache. Less is more, I agree. Just know the rich are still rich and the rest are pretending.
I've been saying this for years. People always live just outside of their means. I too lived that way for the first half of my adult life. I now live just at or a little under my means. Just make sure you pay off that credit card every month. That is the most important thing you can do to assure your financial freedom. Interest rates on credit cards is criminal.
Note to self
You shouldn't live life like a competition
You may have heard the saying: "Big hat, no cattle." This is another way of describing people who try so hard to look wealthy but are actually not rich at all. I decided long ago not to try and play that game because it just doesn't make sense.
I once had a Chinese girlfriend and the culture around money, income, and possessions was surprisingly transparent. The first thing Chinese people would ask you, as part of neutral small talk, is how much you make and what your current spending habits or hobbies are. Comparing salaries seems to utterly normal, and getting a zero-interest loan or the best all-you-can-eat carryout place is something of a pastime. My impression is that Chinese did not put all that much prestige on material wealth which is why it was small-talk, but having a college degree or, better yet, a scientific or medical degree, was what denoted prestige. There was keeping up with the Joneses but it was concentrated on the education of children and not so much on material wealth (real or fake).
Are you serious? Chinese out of all people, who value face more than anything?
@@solmariuce5303 I find Chinese to value face but that face is more concerned with education and class rather than monetary wealth.
oh, they care, they call you baizuo it basically means white cuck
@@langhamp8912 absolutely false, and China is in A TON OF DEBT
@@solmariuce5303 he's baizuo they mocked him to his face and he thought it was a compliment - asking wages is basically accusing you of being poor
When I got a better job the only thing I changed with the way I live is I bought the more expensive chocolate and the more expensive clothes. Nothing else changed so I managed to save a lot of money. I stopped buying expensive chocolate since I didn't enjoy it more but the clothing I really enjoy.
I wish I had found you when I was a young man. As sad as that is, I’m glad I still have time to learn and make changes before the grim reaper shows up. Keep sharing your wisdom.
Thank you so much for your videos! They are very helpful.
I saw this a while ago when a friend asked to borrow money from me. I was shocked because we were both single men in our 20's but he earned about 25% more than me at the time. The difference was that he had the smartest clothes, the latest cellphone and the trendiest car. Meanwhile I had the down payment for my first house and was actively looking to purchase.
Good video as always. I personally feel it's very important not to flaunt wealth. It can quite often invite the wrong people into your life. Those who want nothing more than to take what you have and sometimes even feel they are entitled to it. Live simply and humble, and help those who need it when you can. It's a much more enriching life.
Nearly 99% of people couldn't live in their house or have the stuff they 'own' without being in debt or having credit cards. Whenever I see someone 'rich' looking I always think they've probably overstretched themselves or bought clothes on After Pay or at the very least just put it all on a credit card. I'm so happy my wife and I have no debt or loans, have never had any and we only ever pay for things if we have the money for them.
True. Two of my bff’s are so wealthy but no one can tell coz they’re laid back and chill. While I have to work overtime 10-12 hr shifts. They both paid car and home in cash in their early 20’s.
I wish I found Nicole's channel sooner, I'm learning a lot.This needed when I was in university which they should teach btw. I'm tired of keeping up with the trends etc😢 i need to take care of my finances so I can live my life instead of impressing others with frivolous nonsense that doesn't save me! People don't know how unhealthy is to live with debt, it's like mind prison.I need to be free while I'm still young and healthy.Thank you Nicole❤
Love your grandma’s saying. I laughed out loud.
Us with the big houses, swimming pool and multiple cars actually own it all. The difference is that we bought the house when the market was at its lowest circa 2011, all cars, trucks and suv were purchased pre pandemic. We don’t hire a house cleaner but those with house cleaner make way more money than normal with job stability. I in particular do not need a plumber, electrician or carpenter and a mechanic. Our older folks taught us how to fix cars or our house ourselves. Summer break is a great time to learn a trade. Nowadays, everything is on TH-cam which makes it even easier to do things like change a starter or install a stereo on vehicles.
great post.. very well done.. I just got my home loan down to 15 years on a refi, saved so much loot. your grandmother is/was wise.. my dad says similar stuff.. one of my sociology professors also spoke on this all the time.
One of the things that really amazes me is how many luxury cars there are on the road. The old classic budget says you shouldn't spend more than 10% of your take-home pay budget on transportation. I imagine that would include gas, insurance, maintenance and repairs. I would be shocked if more than 25% of luxury car buyers, or even regular car buyers, follow this guideline today.
I have spent a lot of effort and a decent amount of money on a large collection of costumes. I love having people look at me and smile and more so to ask to have a photo taken with me. Seeing others enjoy seeing me in my costumes brings me a great amount of joy.
Now if you asked my siblings what they thought of my costumes they would say that I have wasted my money and time on them. My brother actually blocked me from my inheritance for many years because he thought that I was extremely financially irresponsible. This is the same brother who bought a condo that he could not afford without blowing his share of his part of our inheritance from our parents. I have yet to spend one single penny of my inheritance but have put it into a low fee S&P 500 index.
Who is actually the one who has been financially responsible. Him who had to get a condo in a tall building just so he can feel rich or me who invested my inheritance and only spent want I was making at my job so I can have fun seeing others have fun.
Even a century ago they recognized the problem of lifestyle creep. If you read George Classon's book The richest man in Babylon, "Our necessary expenses will match our increase in pay unless we protest to the contrary".
Great video! I loved the point you made at 4:35 - "people are trying to keep up with the entire world" thanks to social media. It's been a huge shift. Those old enough to remember the early 2000's will recall that in the pre-social-media era, there were far fewer "real" celebrities compared with today. These days every 12 year old Tiktoker has their own lambo, mansion, clothing line and endorsement deal, making it seem like anyone and everyone can make it.
It's no point being very frugal the whole life and hoping one day retire living an abundance lifestyle. I have lost very close ones either from terminal illness or very suddenly before and after retirement, and it all started around age 50. They were all healthy people, no one knows what the future holds.
For me, it's all about discipline and percentage. I am over 50s and earn good money, decide to indulge myself a little bit more while I still have the physical ability, health and active mind. I spend 10-15% of my income for restaurants, gadgets and nice clothes. Enjoys the PRESENT.
We know people who are both fake rich and real rich. I have no desire to be either.
The fake rich seem to have it all and they love showing it off, but yet the wife is forced to work extra hours at a job she hates in an effort to help pay for it all.
The truly rich have a live-in housekeeper, a driver, three huge homes and vacation in Spain and Italy on a whim in a private jet. They have also hired an interior designer and gave them free rein. The result is a home that looks like a museum, it doesn't reflect the tastes of the people who own the home. They show it off also, but I don't think they have a choice. I DO know they have a lot of "friends" because the wife is always paying for things for them. For example, she paid for someone's in ground pool, college and various vacations. It makes me wonder if they would be friends otherwise.
I'm not against money, believe me, but I take joy and pride into saving up for things, decorating my own home and being selective in what I buy. When you can get whatever you want whenever you want, it seems to take the joy out of it.
I know what you mean about both real rich and fake rich, totally agree. Sometimes I think the best kept secret in life is all the people who have good income and savings/investments but live like lower to middle class in their day to day - stealth wealth!
People thought we were ballers for about 4 years after filing bankruptcy. We ended up renting a very nice 3600 square foot house with a view at about half the market rate. (Landlords were more interested in tenants that would treat it like their own home than renters, as they intended to occupy it later.) We bought next to nothing during that time while we kept our debt near zero. It was absurd, and we didn't even furnish 1/3 of the place. Friends still thought we were rich though!. LOL That allowed us to purchase a much more modest home of less than half the size with no view when we finally did leave.
A very good book out there I read maybe 40 years ago. It's called The Millionaire Next Door
One of the things I learned is that a lot of people appear wealthy and think everything will be OK, simply because they’re naive or willfully naive.