hi loves hope everyone’s having a great week! sorry the upload schedule got a little messed up this past week but lots of new vids coming so make sure you’re subscribed 🤗 & be sure to go to NextEvo.com/ABBYASSELIN to get 25% off your order! Thanks to NextEvo for sponsoring this video! 🩷
You are absolutely my comfort creator 💛 In case you ever need to hear it, we love watching your content and seeing you grow + shine! You’ve come such a long way, keep going girl!
I relate so much to your social anxiety talk. It’s so hard making friends in your 20s. Everyone can be in such different stages of life so it makes it hard to find the right people who don’t drain your social battery
LOL griffin makes it sound so easy “just go up and say something random.” I’ve done that and then 10 days later, I’m laying wide awake at how awkward I was 😂
i feel crazy talking to thomas about the complexities of friendships too 😂 they simplify it so much i swear but i love that we both need that reminder sometimes to not overthink it. something that helped me so much was starting to put myself in new environments where other people also want to make friends so for me it was run club, i wonder if there's something like that where you are too since you have to jog to be conversationally, or a walk club even it a good idea🥹 sending love
RIGHT!! def trying out your tips with the new environments in march, it's on my goal list in my doodle planner :') thank you sm for the support and love always
Omg Griffin cuddles you and gave you a big hug once you were talking about difficulty of having new friends made me cry ! 😢 such a moving moment ❤. But it’s hard I understand you. I am outsider in the town and it’s just so hard and you always feel like you almost asking people to accept you . Such an interesting subject to talk. Please have some more about it ❤
I so appreciate you talking about how hard it can be to make new friends. I really resonate with how you feel about being the one to initiate hanging out or talking to someone new. It can be hard for sure. Your videos have always been so comforting to watch!
I hard core relate to your social anxiety! That’s something I’ve been struggling with for the past two years. What helped me was remembering that even if they seem to already have their best friends/friend circle, we never know if that particular person sees those people as their best friends. I slowly made my way into a small friend group where I’m now one of their best friends. Even though I thought they didn’t want me as a friend, they actually did. You never know what people feel like they’re missing in their life! You seem so happy and relaxed! ❤ love the vlog!
I am usually not one to comment on your videos but feel like with this topic on friendships and social anxiety even with people you are close to already I have too! I am going through the same thing and it is literally the worse ever and so uncomfortable! So difficult to make friends in your 20s and not many people talk about it so thank you Abby. You should be so proud of yourself for doing what you are doing and know that you’ll attract your people when it’s meant to be. Also you are so lucky to have an amazing supportive guy like Griffin who is goofy and makes jokes to get you out of your head 🥰 Love your content and keep up the amazing work xx
Of course! Thank you for sharing & for the encouragement 🥰 & yes griffin helps my overthinking so much I’m so thankful he’s there to ground me lol. Appreciate you & sending love 🩷
27 year old viewer that also lives in TX and is married with no kids. I FEEL THE SAME exact way with friendships and social anxiety. It has only gotten worse over the years as I've gotten older. You are not alone.
I feel like it's so hard to put yourself out there though!! even if you are the one to initiate a conversation/friendship because you genuinely feel like you could be friends with that person, that friendship not being reciprocated/being one-sided/you always reaching out or feeling like they already have other close friends/an established friend group that you just kinda try to "fit in" without ever really knowing if that person considers you a "real" friend is what makes it so hard to make friends lol
it really is!!! it's DRAINING always being the person putting in effort but then seeing people put in effort with other friends, it makes you wonder if you're just not good enough. which i know isnt true, but it's hard not to get in your head about it and it can take a hit to your confidence! and i absolutely agree - it makes it feel like you're just trying to fit in somewhere you may not even be wanted :') sigh. sending love
YES!! I am in the same boat. I am struggling to maintain friendships because I feel like everyone already has their people :( even though you have a best friend in your husband it still is hard because I am sure he has friends and you want that. I want friends as well and am hoping to find my people one day. Thank you for being one of my people, even if it is online.
Omg I love this! it feels so comforting & so relatable. ive loved watching you grow since literally Alabama, like sophomore year? lol & you look the happiest you've been in FORever here.
I totally understand the friendship anxiety. I’ve always had a lot of friends or acquaintances, but I haven’t had a best friend or main group of few friends since HS. I struggle to find friends as a 23 year old both in the work setting and any other place i end up. Most people I meet already have their close friends or people they grew up with and so i’m just stuck with casual friends. It’s definitely hard
As someone who also left their finance 9-5pm in January and struggles with anxiety, I feel like not having that social interaction is really tough. I feel like the best option is to have a hybrid work environment. You can go into the office when you miss that social interaction but work from home when you’re feeling over stimulated or just need a break from it. Hang in there 💕
hi! I relate heavily to your social anxiety talk. I’ve been going through the same thing with working from home and already having heavy anxiety. Also, my husband does the same thing, he instantly makes friends whereas I struggle with making and maintaining them. 🙃
Hey Abby, I understand your social anxiety. It can so hard to start and maintain friendships. So many people go through that but we are relational people. We need that connection with people. And I’d definitely recommend the book called “Find Your People” from Jennie Allen. It talks all about how to connect to others and the importance. I think you’d enjoy🫶🏼
Social anxiety is so real! I moved to Houston in September after finishing grad school in Tuscaloosa. Still getting into the swing of things now that I'm in such a new environment, and realizing it's harder than it was back when I started college haha I'm in the Heights if you ever want to tackle social anxiety together! (also a swiftie lol)
hahaha love the swiftie disclaimer!! noted for sure, and how cool that you were in tuscaloosa for grad school! sending love & hope you're loving houston so far :)
Commenting before I finish the video so you may talk about it more but I’m in the same position with friendships as well were it just seems so easy for my partner and I just can’t get the hang of it. I know it feels hard to put yourself out there but if you are up for it I definitely recommend book clubs or any kind of group that has to do with hobbies you may enjoy. You built in have things to talk about, and normally a set day for the group to meet up so no need to worry about initiating a hang out and if you and another person do hit it off you don’t really have to worry about offending anyone else because that’s really the point.
i have it on my goals in march to try a book club, so fingers crossed it goes well! i agree that putting yourself in situations where there's a common ground makes it way easier. thank you for the input and encouragement and sending you love
I think people's situations always change. So, yes there will be times where people might not need new friends but there will also be times when they are open for new connections. You can't know that until you try. I say, do the uncomfortable thing and go against your mind and try anyways. Even if people don't seem receptive to being your friend, at least you will have practice chatting to people and putting yourself out there again. Then, at some point, that practice will come in handy. But yeah, covid did change us all a little bit :/
I can resonate with your social anxiety 100% my husband and I recently moved from Texas to Alabama and its been soooo hard because I also wfh i love it but also i want a friend ): but i feel like someone has to reach out to me and not the other way around because im so introverted especially being in a whole new state
so i was able to go to therapy through a service called Lyra through my corporate job, and i used that website to search for therapists who accepted the Lyra benefits! they all had little bios about what they specialized in which was helpful. it's so scary finding a therapist and i know it can take a LOT of tries to find one that clicks. i would google and thoroughly read reviews on people as much as you can!
Abby Love your recent vlogs so so so much and I really really missed your vlogs a lot you are my truly truly inspiration💗🥹💗 and you your new profile picture looks so so beautiful
Abby, have you read "Find Your People" by Jennie Allen? HIGHLY recommend. One of my resolutions is also to be more intentional with my friendships and this book has been super helpful!
omg girl i can relate about making new friends its SO hard i made one in the past year and that was enough for me to have a few good ones, i get it. here if you need a new one but im in CA :D
Griffin is right though, you have to get out there to make friends 😅 But my advice knowing Houston and several people there is that joining an organization like Junior League, or getting involved with a non-profit's young professional group is one of the best ways to meet people in that city. My friends there have made deep lifelong friends from people they met in those groups. And just know more people are open to new friends than you think :)
so true! that's awesome to hear that your friends made lifelong friends that way - definitely looking for more communities i can plug myself into and see what comes of it. thanks for the positivity and insight :)
Maybe you can meet local content creators to find new friends who understand your current lifestyle! For the other friends through your husband, i feel this lol to individually get together with one or two of the girls maybe next time you’re in a group setting pick up on one thing you have in common like for example if one girl mentions a work out studio you could individually ask her if she wants to go to a class together or another example if one girl mentions reading you could ask her for her good reads or what she’s currently reading and exchange numbers to chat about books then these little things might blossom into more
im trying to meet with one in the next few weeks which will be good!! and that's a good point, i need to be more strategic about it for sure to see if there's common ground where it makes sense for me to just ask one or two people lol. thanks for the insight
Hi, I am not sure if you will see this message or if it will help at all, but I was just listening to a Podcast that talked about social anxiety and thinking about it in my own life, and they said one of the main reasons for social anxiety is almost like an obsession with oneself. I am not saying by any means that you are the same as I am, but that line hit me. Overthinking how someone else will view me totally changes the trajectory of the interaction from a give and a take to a one sided situation. It's like worrying too much about how that person will view me vs. what might blossom from this situation for both of us if I just go up and talk to them? I don't know if that makes sense, and there are definitely a number of reasons and thoughts other than what I just mentioned that go into a situation, but just something I thought I would share. (Also, to get out of my head, I love going to volunteer weekly or monthly at local community centers/ church soup kitchens/ etc.)
this is SOOOO true - i saw a video about this one time and totally forgot about it so thank you for the reminder!! it can be so easy to get so in our own head that we forget there is a whole other human and thought process that we dont know about involved. thanks for the insight :)
I wish I could hangout with you Abby and be your friend! ❤ Also quick question: did you drop your middle name altogether since you’re using your maiden name as your middle name?
HAHAHA i used it SOME but i was like mmmmm not worth it for how little i do use it lol. it was more of an "oh! this book i already wanted to read is on KU, nice!" instead of me searching for books to read through KU lolol
Could your social anxiety be coming from not being in a routine of going to work in office anymore? I dealt with a lot of this during the pandemic when I was laid off for a long period of time and wasn’t able to go to work. I’m confident that you can get through it. You’re not alone and I’m here for you if you happen to need a listening ear 🩷
hi loves hope everyone’s having a great week! sorry the upload schedule got a little messed up this past week but lots of new vids coming so make sure you’re subscribed 🤗 & be sure to go to NextEvo.com/ABBYASSELIN to get 25% off your order! Thanks to NextEvo for sponsoring this video! 🩷
You are absolutely my comfort creator 💛 In case you ever need to hear it, we love watching your content and seeing you grow + shine! You’ve come such a long way, keep going girl!
Awhhh thank you 🥹🩷🥰 appreciate your support & glad you’re here!!!
I relate so much to your social anxiety talk. It’s so hard making friends in your 20s. Everyone can be in such different stages of life so it makes it hard to find the right people who don’t drain your social battery
so true!! sending you love
LOL griffin makes it sound so easy “just go up and say something random.” I’ve done that and then 10 days later, I’m laying wide awake at how awkward I was 😂
RIGHT AHAHHAHAHAH i feel this. overthinking everrrrry single interaction and convo ever :')
Love how supportive Griff is and those chocolate covered strawberries looked delish!
The friendship talk is so real, thank you ❤
of course, sending love
i feel crazy talking to thomas about the complexities of friendships too 😂 they simplify it so much i swear but i love that we both need that reminder sometimes to not overthink it. something that helped me so much was starting to put myself in new environments where other people also want to make friends so for me it was run club, i wonder if there's something like that where you are too since you have to jog to be conversationally, or a walk club even it a good idea🥹 sending love
RIGHT!! def trying out your tips with the new environments in march, it's on my goal list in my doodle planner :') thank you sm for the support and love always
Omg Griffin cuddles you and gave you a big hug once you were talking about difficulty of having new friends made me cry ! 😢 such a moving moment ❤. But it’s hard I understand you. I am outsider in the town and it’s just so hard and you always feel like you almost asking people to accept you . Such an interesting subject to talk. Please have some more about it ❤
I so appreciate you talking about how hard it can be to make new friends. I really resonate with how you feel about being the one to initiate hanging out or talking to someone new. It can be hard for sure. Your videos have always been so comforting to watch!
awe thank you for the love and support! appreciate you being here
Loving the longer vlogs & new editing!! Here for all eras of this channel 💛💛
AWE ily!!! thank you :')
I hard core relate to your social anxiety! That’s something I’ve been struggling with for the past two years. What helped me was remembering that even if they seem to already have their best friends/friend circle, we never know if that particular person sees those people as their best friends. I slowly made my way into a small friend group where I’m now one of their best friends. Even though I thought they didn’t want me as a friend, they actually did. You never know what people feel like they’re missing in their life!
You seem so happy and relaxed! ❤ love the vlog!
you're so right!! thank you for the encouragement, support, and love! appreciate you
I am usually not one to comment on your videos but feel like with this topic on friendships and social anxiety even with people you are close to already I have too! I am going through the same thing and it is literally the worse ever and so uncomfortable! So difficult to make friends in your 20s and not many people talk about it so thank you Abby. You should be so proud of yourself for doing what you are doing and know that you’ll attract your people when it’s meant to be. Also you are so lucky to have an amazing supportive guy like Griffin who is goofy and makes jokes to get you out of your head 🥰 Love your content and keep up the amazing work xx
Of course! Thank you for sharing & for the encouragement 🥰 & yes griffin helps my overthinking so much I’m so thankful he’s there to ground me lol. Appreciate you & sending love 🩷
Loving this new era 🫶🏻
27 year old viewer that also lives in TX and is married with no kids. I FEEL THE SAME exact way with friendships and social anxiety. It has only gotten worse over the years as I've gotten older. You are not alone.
Sending you love 🥺🩷
I feel like it's so hard to put yourself out there though!! even if you are the one to initiate a conversation/friendship because you genuinely feel like you could be friends with that person, that friendship not being reciprocated/being one-sided/you always reaching out or feeling like they already have other close friends/an established friend group that you just kinda try to "fit in" without ever really knowing if that person considers you a "real" friend is what makes it so hard to make friends lol
it really is!!! it's DRAINING always being the person putting in effort but then seeing people put in effort with other friends, it makes you wonder if you're just not good enough. which i know isnt true, but it's hard not to get in your head about it and it can take a hit to your confidence! and i absolutely agree - it makes it feel like you're just trying to fit in somewhere you may not even be wanted :') sigh. sending love
YES!! I am in the same boat. I am struggling to maintain friendships because I feel like everyone already has their people :( even though you have a best friend in your husband it still is hard because I am sure he has friends and you want that. I want friends as well and am hoping to find my people one day. Thank you for being one of my people, even if it is online.
thank YOU for being here!!! online friends are still friends
Omg I love this! it feels so comforting & so relatable. ive loved watching you grow since literally Alabama, like sophomore year? lol & you look the happiest you've been in FORever here.
when griffin said "so then you wont ever have any friends" I LOST IT hahahaha he is so precious
thank you for the love and support omg!! def doing soooo much better than i was this time last year/recently :')
I totally understand the friendship anxiety. I’ve always had a lot of friends or acquaintances, but I haven’t had a best friend or main group of few friends since HS. I struggle to find friends as a 23 year old both in the work setting and any other place i end up. Most people I meet already have their close friends or people they grew up with and so i’m just stuck with casual friends. It’s definitely hard
totally feel you - hang in there and keep trying to put yourself out there!
@@AbbyAsselin You too!!!
As someone who also left their finance 9-5pm in January and struggles with anxiety, I feel like not having that social interaction is really tough. I feel like the best option is to have a hybrid work environment. You can go into the office when you miss that social interaction but work from home when you’re feeling over stimulated or just need a break from it. Hang in there 💕
it really is! i agree that a flexible hybrid environment is the best. thank you
Love your content so much! ❤
awe yay im glad :')
I can relate so much to what you have to say about friendships your not alone.
sending love
love the longer vlogs from you abby
hi! I relate heavily to your social anxiety talk. I’ve been going through the same thing with working from home and already having heavy anxiety. Also, my husband does the same thing, he instantly makes friends whereas I struggle with making and maintaining them. 🙃
i wish it was as easy for us as it is for them :') sending you love!!
I completely agree and relate to everything you said.
Hey Abby, I understand your social anxiety. It can so hard to start and maintain friendships. So many people go through that but we are relational people. We need that connection with people. And I’d definitely recommend the book called “Find Your People” from Jennie Allen. It talks all about how to connect to others and the importance. I think you’d enjoy🫶🏼
ill have to look into that! thank you for the rec :) and love your profile picture hehehe
Good point about the receipts because I don’t typically keep the paper ones when I know I can access them on the stores app
Social anxiety is so real! I moved to Houston in September after finishing grad school in Tuscaloosa. Still getting into the swing of things now that I'm in such a new environment, and realizing it's harder than it was back when I started college haha I'm in the Heights if you ever want to tackle social anxiety together! (also a swiftie lol)
hahaha love the swiftie disclaimer!! noted for sure, and how cool that you were in tuscaloosa for grad school! sending love & hope you're loving houston so far :)
Griffin being the best husband 🥹
right :')
Abby, when people get older, the easiest way to make friends is through a certain social activity or a hobby that brings you joy. Try that.
Commenting before I finish the video so you may talk about it more but I’m in the same position with friendships as well were it just seems so easy for my partner and I just can’t get the hang of it. I know it feels hard to put yourself out there but if you are up for it I definitely recommend book clubs or any kind of group that has to do with hobbies you may enjoy. You built in have things to talk about, and normally a set day for the group to meet up so no need to worry about initiating a hang out and if you and another person do hit it off you don’t really have to worry about offending anyone else because that’s really the point.
i have it on my goals in march to try a book club, so fingers crossed it goes well! i agree that putting yourself in situations where there's a common ground makes it way easier. thank you for the input and encouragement and sending you love
I think people's situations always change. So, yes there will be times where people might not need new friends but there will also be times when they are open for new connections. You can't know that until you try. I say, do the uncomfortable thing and go against your mind and try anyways. Even if people don't seem receptive to being your friend, at least you will have practice chatting to people and putting yourself out there again. Then, at some point, that practice will come in handy. But yeah, covid did change us all a little bit :/
so true! exercising that social muscle is key, im only making things worse by ruminating over it at home
I can resonate with your social anxiety 100% my husband and I recently moved from Texas to Alabama and its been soooo hard because I also wfh i love it but also i want a friend ): but i feel like someone has to reach out to me and not the other way around because im so introverted especially being in a whole new state
ahh i know moving to a whole new state AND being remote is a double whammy :( sending you love!!
Can you please do a video about the Oura ring?!?
Where did you find your therapist and how did you connect with a good one?
so i was able to go to therapy through a service called Lyra through my corporate job, and i used that website to search for therapists who accepted the Lyra benefits! they all had little bios about what they specialized in which was helpful. it's so scary finding a therapist and i know it can take a LOT of tries to find one that clicks. i would google and thoroughly read reviews on people as much as you can!
The highlights will save on Goodreads if your kindle is linked, even once the book is returned on Libby!
YAYYYYYY this made my day tysm!!!
Abby Love your recent vlogs so so so much and I really really missed your vlogs a lot you are my truly truly inspiration💗🥹💗 and you your new profile picture looks so so beautiful
thank you so much!
Abby, have you read "Find Your People" by Jennie Allen? HIGHLY recommend. One of my resolutions is also to be more intentional with my friendships and this book has been super helpful!
I haven’t read that but THANK YOU for the rec!!! Will have to add it to my list 🩷
omg girl i can relate about making new friends its SO hard i made one in the past year and that was enough for me to have a few good ones, i get it. here if you need a new one but im in CA :D
quality over quantity for sure!! thank you, internet friends still count
Griffin is right though, you have to get out there to make friends 😅 But my advice knowing Houston and several people there is that joining an organization like Junior League, or getting involved with a non-profit's young professional group is one of the best ways to meet people in that city. My friends there have made deep lifelong friends from people they met in those groups. And just know more people are open to new friends than you think :)
so true! that's awesome to hear that your friends made lifelong friends that way - definitely looking for more communities i can plug myself into and see what comes of it. thanks for the positivity and insight :)
there's a Stardew Valley update coming!! PC: March 19th, consoles & mobile are coming after
ooo good to know, TY!
Maybe you can meet local content creators to find new friends who understand your current lifestyle! For the other friends through your husband, i feel this lol to individually get together with one or two of the girls maybe next time you’re in a group setting pick up on one thing you have in common like for example if one girl mentions a work out studio you could individually ask her if she wants to go to a class together or another example if one girl mentions reading you could ask her for her good reads or what she’s currently reading and exchange numbers to chat about books then these little things might blossom into more
im trying to meet with one in the next few weeks which will be good!! and that's a good point, i need to be more strategic about it for sure to see if there's common ground where it makes sense for me to just ask one or two people lol. thanks for the insight
Hi, I am not sure if you will see this message or if it will help at all, but I was just listening to a Podcast that talked about social anxiety and thinking about it in my own life, and they said one of the main reasons for social anxiety is almost like an obsession with oneself. I am not saying by any means that you are the same as I am, but that line hit me. Overthinking how someone else will view me totally changes the trajectory of the interaction from a give and a take to a one sided situation. It's like worrying too much about how that person will view me vs. what might blossom from this situation for both of us if I just go up and talk to them? I don't know if that makes sense, and there are definitely a number of reasons and thoughts other than what I just mentioned that go into a situation, but just something I thought I would share. (Also, to get out of my head, I love going to volunteer weekly or monthly at local community centers/ church soup kitchens/ etc.)
this is SOOOO true - i saw a video about this one time and totally forgot about it so thank you for the reminder!! it can be so easy to get so in our own head that we forget there is a whole other human and thought process that we dont know about involved. thanks for the insight :)
I wish I could hangout with you Abby and be your friend! ❤
Also quick question: did you drop your middle name altogether since you’re using your maiden name as your middle name?
awe same
I just cancelled my KU membership this month. I never used it lol 😂
HAHAHA i used it SOME but i was like mmmmm not worth it for how little i do use it lol. it was more of an "oh! this book i already wanted to read is on KU, nice!" instead of me searching for books to read through KU lolol
get you a man who will watch the eras tour movie with you >>>>
❤❤❤
My husband has a million friends and doesn’t understand why it’s so hard for me. Like I’m sorry sir, I get anxious
LITERALLY lol, griffin is a totallll extrovert so i feel ya
Could your social anxiety be coming from not being in a routine of going to work in office anymore? I dealt with a lot of this during the pandemic when I was laid off for a long period of time and wasn’t able to go to work. I’m confident that you can get through it. You’re not alone and I’m here for you if you happen to need a listening ear 🩷
thank you so much!