Finding a black therapist is also crucial because that way you can discuss the real issues that effect black people i.e racism, colorism, white supremacy, a hostile work environment, sexual abuse etc.
yeah you might say all of that. but deep down inside it is not about racism. a person can be racist to you for years and no depression comes by. depression just might be how an individual views the world with out receiving any facts. you need to get out there man.
Look at that nut from the Kansas City Chiefs who threw a woman to the floor...then Doug Williams said it was "small potatoes." No wonder you're all nervous!
I had it my whole life and I'm just now getting well. I know have a great therapist. The strong black woman stereotype works against us. People feel little empathy for us because we're supposed to be strong. That does not lead to support.
One of my friends is Caucasian and I’m black and we both have anxiety and depression So when she gets sad about something everyone is there to comfort her But when I’m sad about something everyone says that I’m always wanting attention or they say that I’m gonna be fine
Young Savage That’s happened to me too (lol ironic ending a sentence with me too since that’s a prime example of how white women always get treated special but black women are never acknowledged in the same way). And I’m really sorry. Not a fun feeling. You should seek other people to have in your circle who will treat you as the individual you are. I had to do this and it made me happier. Unfortunately, the folks who have the double standard won’t see it as a problem, or at least in my experience they don’t.
6 ปีที่แล้ว +9
I am a 68 year old white man, and I think this woman is beautiful inside and out.
Please note as a mental health professional, medications are sometimes necessary and taboo that can hinder addressing the root issue. Note the right medication will not alter your personality.
Yeah, sometimes it's necessary. Some people might not be open to receiving any treatment and medication can help them be more open, receptive & responsive. I know it helped me. And it hasn't changed my personality
Please note that this is not true. To everyone who already feels on edge about medications. Dependency is the first step to subconsciously choosing depressed modes.
Loved this video..I definitely need to seek help, or talk to somebody, but I can't afford it at the moment. Going to try to meditate & exercise, & not look for happiness in men. Thank you ❤️
I would suggest checking through your health plan too...sometimes they have copays for behavioral health doc visits depending on your insurer. And if you're in school/ college there may be resources there for you on campus. And some psychiatrists and therapists have a sliding scale for payment based on income. Its take time and research which in itself is a deterrent to get help..even without the stigma...but from my experiences, worth it.
that's my issue as well I recently moved to a new area after graduating university and i literally have no one. being alone infused a lot of despression however i do not have the financial means to seek helps. I've ran out of options i guess i'll just keep ignoring it.
I agree with everything in this video! Being a black women I get it 100% I feel like a lot of times we are there for everyone but who is there for us black women? I'm a silent sufferer type and I love that you made this video!! I feel we are one of the most strongest creatures on the planet but tbh all women are but it's harder for us because our skin color to deal with things like this... thank you ❤️❤️❤️
@Naija girl :( I'm so sorry getting help completely turned my depression and life around. I wish things were different so you could get support you're worth it. Take care
In four days, I’ll being seeing my first therapist. For some time, some of my friends suggested it, but I kept putting it off. In the last few months, I have been feeling very despondent to the point of just sobbing in bed, waking up in the middle of the night, and overeating. Some days are good. Some days are really bad. Praying for anyone reading this that is going through a mental health issue. It’s not fun at all.
Talking about my experiences and depression is definitely helping me heal. I was so ashamed, but now that I basically let the entire world know my "secrets", I feel liberated. Opening up also helps others know that they are not alone.
Great video. This is a subject not talked about enough in our community. It's brave to open up and share your own experience. I hope this video will help someone!
I don't know if I'm self loathing or just depressed. I'm 21 years old attend an integrated university. However as I've grown older and more conscious im starting to see the injustice of blacks. I'm becoming very unhappy with myself relationship job family school etc. I'm crying as I write this i just don't know who I am. I consider myself pro black I believe my people should have their own institutions and look out for their own. I don't hate anyone I'm just tired of my people always being down as if they are blinded by the fact. I'm saddened by all the ignorance I'm around. I honestly hate school at this point. I'm tired of being taught by white teachers whom don't understand me. I do plan on going to a black school for graduate school though. I want more enlightment i want black mentors who can help guide me through this confusion anger resentment I have. Any suggestions?
I’m going through it right now. I bottle the heck out of my emotions until they burst. I was just driving and didnt really wanna listen to music so I went to TH-cam. The first thing I typed in the search bar was “dealing with depression as a black woman” And I know that watching a video, no offense, of someone who is not of color talk about depression I wouldn’t have been fulfilled with the information completely. I love you for this video, and it definitely opened up my eyes to meditation. New subscriber as well, I’d love to learn more about these healing mediation methods, because I do not want to be on depression meds. THANK YOU!
I can't express to you how ON TIME this video is for me! Thank you so much for sharing your experience and being transparent. You said many things that I could relate to and understand in this video, but the thing that resonated with me the most was "Meditation over Medication". Like I want to put it on a t-shirt or something! Lol Those three words completely express how I feel when it comes to finding ways to cope with depression, but most importantly to HEAL. Please do share more about what meditation practices have worked for you.
Wow this is deep. I grew up with a bipolar parent who was hospitalized at least a dozen times. I myself have had recurring issues with anxiety, panic attacks and depression although I wasn't clinically diagnosed. It is imperative black people have some form of sufficient self-care to ensure we are okay mentally/emotionally. Going out to 'get a drink' or getting drunk does not make your problems go away--its only a poor distraction. Most psychotropic drugs don't help mental illness--all it does is slow the person down in slow motion. Now some people may need it at times for manic depression but not all the time. We are so busy trying to be strong and independent but black suicide is on the rise. On a shallow note, love the hair!
Yes I know but me I drink sometimes but only in moerderation when I be at someones cookout or at the gathering or even at the picnic. But in my family they drink all the time even they be taking some durgs also! But me I don't take no durgs & plus I don't like to take no perspiction pain klliers because it will make you go nuts!
sweetchari wow are we the same person? also grew up with a black parent who's bipolar and in denial and is in and out of hospital. it's been really tough but everything you said really resonates with me
Wow I sorry you had to go through all that. I really wish black people would be open-minded on mental illness because I have my own struggle with anxiety and depression. And when you tell some of them the way they look at you is like almost as if you were a monster or something. It really sucks
Thanks for being so vulnerable. I have seen a therapist for years too and it always shocks my friends. When I recommend seeking help to my friends who are struggling there answer is: "I'm not crazy" or "I can go to church". We need dialogue to break down these stigmas and walls because so many of us are suffering. What do you suggest from a mediation standpoint?
My family has always been stressed out. Why would I throw my problems onto people that are always at the tipping point of a mental breakdowns themselves? Nobody has time for these problems. I feel like the terrible norm is to just keep going until it becomes the least of your problems.
I am an older woman who has suffered from depression since I was a child and although I'm not ashamed as much as I used to be. I talk about it more now than I used to and I can say that I don't feel well which usually means I'm having a bad day. I don't know if I can find any answers here for me but I am glad to see younger women stepping forward and reaching out to each other. Maybe you'll find some useful tools for handling it.
This was an absolutely beautiful video. I'm so glad I came across your channel. I am going to share this with my clinical psychology class as an example for my project about TH-cam and depression. Thanks for sharing!
Thank you for sharing your story- you are speaking for a lot of us. And I respect your position on medication and although I am on meds right now- I think everyone out there needs to do whatever it is that keeps them alive and able to reach wellness. The biggest misconception is thinking the " Strong Black Woman " trope that needs to be deconstructed. Being strong does not mean being invulnerable to pain and thinking that having to suffer somehow makes the pain more noble. It doesn't. Every time we share our stories and create spaces that others can be seen and heard is doing healing work. You are not alone- and I guess that means I am not alone too. Peace and love
In understand what is the situation. And personally, as a white girl I wanted to know more about how you guys feel so i decided to watch this video. So I wanna say this: y'all beautiful... black, white, bej, brown...y'all good. I love you all. But dear black or brown sisters, don't hold it back. Teach your mama that she needs to let it out too. Holding in emotions is not good for nobody and I want my girls all over the world healed. Please take your time with yourselves and don t be ashamed. God doesn t want you to be ashamed. He wants you to be bold, brave, able to let ir out and so he can fix it for you. P.S thank you Shela for being such an inspiration and helping so many people with your brilliant mind. Bless you!
This video is so refreshing. I've been dealing with it for some time now, but have found meditation and watching what I eat to be the best tools for me. Thank you for speaking out about this.
i am going to point out not as a black woman but a Puerto Rican who sees thing logically. I am a white skin Puerto Rican who did not fit in with whites, blacks and not even my own people so I had vented anger that I learned how to use it to touch my inner strength and have achieve my success and striving to do more with my relationship with GOD. I now set the example where ever I go or now. Does not matter because I learned to love myself. A long journey but finally. We are in a world striving to be different unique and find our own place. Black women are the only ones in the world with that type of hair. Skin like chocolate. Your soul is different and unique in the way you express that wonderful soul that GOD gave you and only you. When society tells you that you are not good enough it is because you are a threat to them. The shape of an hour glass. Instead of embracing this unique beauty you mimic everyone else and wear other peoples hair. Why? In Puerto Rico when you are interested in a woman you call her black. Negra if she is bangin and negrita if she is cute. However society shuns it because they do not want you to know that power and mesmerizing beauty you possess. They all want to get implants and fat suction to look like who? Oh yeah you. But you go and add more to your body to compete, but you are only competing against yourselves. Where do you find the most churches? Black neighborhoods. Every time someone tells you that you are not good enough that means they are threaten by your uniqueness. I have a lot on my plate but if I had the energy I would make this a journey and goal but for now I will let as many people on these sites know that I often stare at black woman and say to myself if only you knew the power, strength and threat you possess. Embrace your chocolate beauty as GOD made you specifically unique. if your angry or depressed use it to empower you. That uniqueness you were born with. Much love and GOD bless and let these women see who they are because society already knows. I would love to get into it but need to keep it short. i would like to tell you about Sarah Baartman and what happened and the impact she had in this world that would shock you unless you are aware of this story. God Bless you and I love you all.
I am an African American Hispanic Chinese Native American and I just recently discovered this about me and my family and I would love to connect with other black women regarding mental health and how to find the best counselor
I’d like to add to this conversation too, as a white woman with brown skinned friends and acquaintances, I see the stigma and shame of mental health issues in black culture, and it’s disheartening when I try to talk openly about it with my brown skinned friends and they laugh at me and push away my feelings and thoughts, I look at it as an opportunity for us to open up and connect with each other over something we are both struggling with, but a lot of times I am met with that attitude of “oh you white people”, and that honestly breaks my heart because I want to help and be a friend but that wall comes up and shuts me down and says “you can’t understand me, because you’re white and I’m black” but we can support one another through our struggles with mental health if we keep an open mind and heart, let’s keep these conversations going so we can all experience healing, women can empower themselves by opening up and getting honest...
Thank you, from the bottom of my heart thank you so much for making this video because I've been dealing with depression since I was 14 years old. I'm 20 now and I'm still dealing with it. And I don't think my family understands it.
Clinical medication effects different people in different ways. Just because your mom had a negative reaction to medication does not mean that all will be affected in that manner. Its is very dangerous to advise anyone with a mental health imbalance to just meditate it away. Meditation may work well for you and thats fine; however, many people who suffer from mental health imbalance do not fair well without the benefit of prescribed medication. Depending on the individual, going off meds or not taking meds at all can lead to very dangerous and harmful events including suicide. It is important that we do not add to the already existing stigma that surrounds mental health diagnosis by implying that prescribed medication is not a helpful or necessary treatment for it. That's just as irresponsible or insensitive as some saying... Lets just go to church and pray it away or...all you need is to go out and have some fun and a few drinks. That will snap you right out of it. These are examples of some of worst adivice one can give to a person dealing with a diagnosed mental health disorder.
At first I thought this was going to be some stupid racist rant on why white people can't be depressed. But props to you for addressing an actual problem. Much like many Asians are expected to be very successful, childhood prodigies. I never noticed that the whole empowerment movement actually has the downfalls of being expected to be invincible.
I enjoyed listening to your video just one thing i didnt agree with is when you started talking about meds. Some people work better with meds. That should be a personal choice.
Thank you so much for sharing! I've been struggling with severe depression and an eating disorder for 6 years and only at the end of 2016 did I finally tell my family and seek help. Since then I've been making leaps and bounds in my recovery, and that's largely due to the medication that I started. I tried therapy for several months and got absolutely nowhere, though thinking back on it, I feel that may have been due to my own inability to believe that I was worthy of recovery In the first place, and no amount of talking could have changed my mind. That's when I decided to look into medication. I've been taking 20mg of Lexapro for 6 months now and things couldn't be better. I know it may not be for everyone, but for me, antidepressants have been a godsend and have changed my life in ways I couldn't have imagined. I feel like I can finally breathe and see beyond the fog that depression cast over my life, I have energy and motivation to get out and exercise again, I talk to my family and friends again, and more importantly, I'm actively planning for my future - and I'm excited about it! For me it was an easy transition with very few side effects (sleepiness and some nausea for the first 3 days), but after that passed its been smooth sailing. I'm not saying this to push the route of medication on anyone, but for those thinking about it, maybe talk to your doctor or a psychiatrist (preferably) to see what options are available to you. Best of luck to everyone who is struggling, stay strong and I hope you can find the help you need ❤️
Sydney.........medication should be taken with precaution, the reason being it leads to addiction and does not cure the problem, but only masks the problem. To effectively remove the problem you need to find the causes and confront them honestly and bravely. With all human problems follow this directive: THE WAY OUT IS THE WAY THROUGH.
This is a really valid. Thank you or sharing. Personally I have recently reached out as an adult for outside help and I am really glad that Shelah shared this.
Girl I love Positive Magazine meditations. I love her channel. Meditation has really helped me through some rough times. At first it was hard to do. But i've found that the stillness requires me to reconcile my trauma.
Omg thank you sooo much for this video I couldn't agree more I was on meds for about 3 years and I hated it I was always happy but deep down I felt like I was being controlled and like deep down I was sad even this my actions due to the meds said otherwise. Plz do a video of f what u do your overcome and what u do to meditate and how you got started I tried diff apps of meditation but I wasn't satisfied plz help
A few years ago, I was feeling what I thought was depression. I was struggling to cope with school , finding purpose and direction in life, I was suicidal and feeling hopeless. I grew up feeling uncomfortable expressing negative emotions with my parents but nonetheless I got the courage to ask for help and though money was tight, my mom took me to see a psychologist. When I got there I found that I was really struggling to communicate what I was feeling to the psychologist. At the end of my appointment, the psychologist told me “there is nothing wrong with you, you just need to make more friends ”. I felt like such a fraud and that I was seeking for attention. To make matters worse, when the bill came, my mom called me to show me how much they had charged her and I felt so guilty. To this day I still live with that guilt. I still struggle with what I think is depression and have suicidal ideations. These past two years have been particularly rough on me. I’ve gone to therapy by myself before but eventually quit. I don’t think I’ll have the courage to speak up again though, I just feel like an attention seeker and stupid when I do. So I guess I’ll have tough it out a little while longer.
Wow i’m so sorry you went through that and I hope things are better now 💝💝💝 I don’t know if this helps, but I went through a similar situation but the cause of my depression was my birth control pills. So if u are on the pills I’ll recommend to stop them immediately. I hope things get better 💞
when you said that meditation allowed you to deal with the root of the problem vs the symptoms of it, i really heard you. im on medication now for the first time and im hoping it makes it easier for me to make meditation a habit. and i think you're right that being connected with yourself deeply through meditation will allow you to have longer and full moments of happiness that you're really really right
Could u talk about lgbt peoples in the black community and how we as black women need to be more of ally’s to them? I see so much hate trans black women being killed and gays being bashed and I can’t help but notice it. Makes my heart hurt because my mama had kicked out my brother and I felt like I couldn’t do anything
I am in tears watching this because my depression has hit so hard this past week and I don't turn to anyone to talk because I feel like it's not something they want to talk about.. Besides that no one pays attention.. They don't want to hear about it which pushes me deeper.. It's just so tough going through this alone
This has been going on with me for years and i have a dark complexion i dont even show my face on the internet im the oldest and my sister has been the strong one of the family.
As weird as this sounds( and I know Im not wierd but i know I wasnt the target audience), and i hope nobody minds this, but im an strait white male who has been going through a hard time in 2020 and have found some very good advice in this video. This is a very excellent video and a wonderful job on inspiration.
Much needed video! Me and many family members suffer from depression but still people have no empathy for each other. It's become a who has suffered the most competition. I guess depression can make people feel every thing is worst for them! I now have a toddler daughter and I put my trust in God hour by hour to give me the energy and positive aura to get through each day. Please let me know what type of meditation and counselling you do. I am a single parent in England with only a drop of family support and I am so desperate to turn my life around. I wanted to get help with better help.com but couldn't afford it.
Meditation is a great way of pulling out the weeds in our heads, as opposed to taking medications that only remove the head of the weed instead of the root...
Thanks for this video Queen. I dont have the shame part. Its definitely the not being understood part....most ppl i know rnt black women like myself or if they r unfortunately they r the negative ones who are comfortable in their misery. I just feel so isolated and nobody can or cares to understand me. That's where the silence comes in. I dont talk to ppl... They dont ask or care... And i Dont know a black woman therapist...cause i wouldnt want to talk to a white person for therapy or a male... Either way i appreciate you SO much for putting this put here. Nobody cares for African women. We have to care for ourselves bc nobody is coming through to uplift us or have our backs smh. I genuinely believe being black AND a woman is an absolute curse. I wish all of you Queens the BEST. Tha ks for being YOU and staying strong! 💪
_Glad this is being talked about I wish I could find more information. I feel so alone , no purpose , & my life is passing me by. I wish I could heal instead of suffering in silence. I read a lot trying to ignore my problems but when the story is done ✅ I’m still silently suffering. 😟😟😟😟_
Yes this is a serious issue. I been hiding it fir a long time. Im 41 yrs old divorced after 16 yrs and was a stay at home wife and mom and now I losy custody of my kids to my ex out of hurt he has. My kids are my life. I see them 2 time a month and I trt to stay strong but I have been so depressed anf its bad. I totally understand. I feel like a failute to my kids if I let people know this. Just lost right now. God Bless you❤
Sounds like me an I’m a white female. I did visit with a brown psychologist who thought I was fine. One visit. That’s it. But yeah meditation over medication is great. Any kind of exercise helps too. Just keep busy doing happy 😊 good things. And prayer 🙏
That was amazing....it is true what u said. I think I may need help cause I suffer from depression. I was molested when I was 15 by my dad. At age 22 and pregnant with my now 14 year old son was almost raped by a male best friend. Because of my outside appearance I was tormented. Never been in a serious relationship, never been loved accepted, always wanted to get married but know that nobody would ever want me. My looks is between a model/ transgender but I am a female. Men only talk to me for sex. I am 36 and have had 35 sexual partners but I got tested. I was always and still am single. I slept with these men thinking that they would make me Dee girlfriend but after the sex they bounce. I was and still am so desperate to be loved, to trust, to be appreciated, accepted, embraced. I cuss and scream at my son and use to physically abuse him until I learned what abuse was and I stopped. I don't have a healthy relationship with my dad nor my family. They degrade, scorn and humiliates me every chance they get. I use to depend on them and they treated me like crap
This is not to distract from the topic. I'm a bit older; mid 30's...She opened the video saying brown girls despite the title, are black women referring to themselves as brown now?
people are a little shocked that a good looking person such as yourself can have depression but there are different underlying causes and it can happen to anyone...
Finding a black therapist is also crucial because that way you can discuss the real issues that effect black people i.e racism, colorism, white supremacy, a hostile work environment, sexual abuse etc.
+sandra bebe TOTALLY agree with your comment as all of those issues have impacted me at some point..
yeah you might say all of that. but deep down inside it is not about racism.
a person can be racist to you for years and no depression comes by.
depression just might be how an individual views the world with out receiving any facts. you need to get out there man.
Yes...but not always easy to find based on geography and just the fact that there is a shortage of us in that field.
sandra bebe I just did this after 10years of struggling through therapist after therapist. Saved my life.
I'm done with seeking help. How does a therapist's race have anything to do with it?
or if we have social anxiety, it's just seen as having an "attitude problem"
keely deloache or the ever popular "you just want attention" *sigh* really irritating
keely deloache or a WEAVE problem.
Right
This_Is_War says the person who crashed this thread with a hostile attitude and nonsense
Damn thats exactly what i would think when i saw colored girls acting weird, i didn't think they got white people problems
no one sees us as human beings with feelings, and it's very disheartening. Your own family doesn't take u serious
exactly... we're not allowed to be soft, feminine and vulnerable.
Trump 2020!!!
kendahke yes y'all are. that's an excuse...
Look at that nut from the Kansas City Chiefs who threw a woman to the floor...then Doug Williams said it was "small potatoes." No wonder you're all nervous!
I had it my whole life and I'm just now getting well. I know have a great therapist.
The strong black woman stereotype works against us. People feel little empathy for us because we're supposed to be strong. That does not lead to support.
One of my friends is Caucasian and I’m black and we both have anxiety and depression
So when she gets sad about something everyone is there to comfort her
But when I’m sad about something everyone says that I’m always wanting attention or they say that I’m gonna be fine
Young Savage That’s happened to me too (lol ironic ending a sentence with me too since that’s a prime example of how white women always get treated special but black women are never acknowledged in the same way). And I’m really sorry. Not a fun feeling. You should seek other people to have in your circle who will treat you as the individual you are. I had to do this and it made me happier. Unfortunately, the folks who have the double standard won’t see it as a problem, or at least in my experience they don’t.
I am a 68 year old white man, and I think this woman is beautiful inside and out.
Please note as a mental health professional, medications are sometimes necessary and taboo that can hinder addressing the root issue. Note the right medication will not alter your personality.
Yeah, sometimes it's necessary. Some people might not be open to receiving any treatment and medication can help them be more open, receptive & responsive. I know it helped me. And it hasn't changed my personality
Please note that this is not true. To everyone who already feels on edge about medications. Dependency is the first step to subconsciously choosing depressed modes.
Loved this video..I definitely need to seek help, or talk to somebody, but I can't afford it at the moment. Going to try to meditate & exercise, & not look for happiness in men. Thank you ❤️
I would suggest checking through your health plan too...sometimes they have copays for behavioral health doc visits depending on your insurer. And if you're in school/ college there may be resources there for you on campus. And some psychiatrists and therapists have a sliding scale for payment based on income. Its take time and research which in itself is a deterrent to get help..even without the stigma...but from my experiences, worth it.
that's my issue as well I recently moved to a new area after graduating university and i literally have no one. being alone infused a lot of despression however i do not have the financial means to seek helps. I've ran out of options i guess i'll just keep ignoring it.
dclarkjeannine you definetlybneed help with thise eyebrows.
they the problem lol
@@ChaeLei Want to talk?
I agree with everything in this video! Being a black women I get it 100% I feel like a lot of times we are there for everyone but who is there for us black women? I'm a silent sufferer type and I love that you made this video!! I feel we are one of the most strongest creatures on the planet but tbh all women are but it's harder for us because our skin color to deal with things like this... thank you ❤️❤️❤️
@Naija girl :( I'm so sorry getting help completely turned my depression and life around. I wish things were different so you could get support you're worth it. Take care
DotsyGlamm very well said. I have anxiety and I think depression has a hand in it
@@Mateo-sx9mv gtfoh
In four days, I’ll being seeing my first therapist. For some time, some of my friends suggested it, but I kept putting it off. In the last few months, I have been feeling very despondent to the point of just sobbing in bed, waking up in the middle of the night, and overeating. Some days are good. Some days are really bad. Praying for anyone reading this that is going through a mental health issue. It’s not fun at all.
Definitely not fun or easy. I hope you're doing well❤️
Talking about my experiences and depression is definitely helping me heal. I was so ashamed, but now that I basically let the entire world know my "secrets", I feel liberated. Opening up also helps others know that they are not alone.
💜 I sent this video to my friend. She's been having a really hard time lately & I hope your videos help her.
Great video. This is a subject not talked about enough in our community. It's brave to open up and share your own experience. I hope this video will help someone!
+EcouiaTV I sent you a msg. please respond when you can. :)
+Latrice “Faith” Waller I'm sorry where did you send the message to?
youtube inbox of yours :)
+Latrice “Faith” Waller I have looked and I have no idea where my inbox is. Please email me at adrielent@gmail.com😰
okay
I don't know if I'm self loathing or just depressed. I'm 21 years old attend an integrated university. However as I've grown older and more conscious im starting to see the injustice of blacks. I'm becoming very unhappy with myself relationship job family school etc. I'm crying as I write this i just don't know who I am. I consider myself pro black I believe my people should have their own institutions and look out for their own. I don't hate anyone I'm just tired of my people always being down as if they are blinded by the fact. I'm saddened by all the ignorance I'm around. I honestly hate school at this point. I'm tired of being taught by white teachers whom don't understand me. I do plan on going to a black school for graduate school though. I want more enlightment i want black mentors who can help guide me through this confusion anger resentment I have. Any suggestions?
Catherian Johnson maybe its your Weave.
Fat Cat Fuck You
Everybody Hates Judy I feel the exact same way 😓
I agree
I’m going through it right now. I bottle the heck out of my emotions until they burst. I was just driving and didnt really wanna listen to music so I went to TH-cam. The first thing I typed in the search bar was “dealing with depression as a black woman” And I know that watching a video, no offense, of someone who is not of color talk about depression I wouldn’t have been fulfilled with the information completely. I love you for this video, and it definitely opened up my eyes to meditation. New subscriber as well, I’d love to learn more about these healing mediation methods, because I do not want to be on depression meds. THANK YOU!
I can't express to you how ON TIME this video is for me! Thank you so much for sharing your experience and being transparent. You said many things that I could relate to and understand in this video, but the thing that resonated with me the most was "Meditation over Medication". Like I want to put it on a t-shirt or something! Lol Those three words completely express how I feel when it comes to finding ways to cope with depression, but most importantly to HEAL. Please do share more about what meditation practices have worked for you.
Wow this is deep. I grew up with a bipolar parent who was hospitalized at least a dozen times. I myself have had recurring issues with anxiety, panic attacks and depression although I wasn't clinically diagnosed. It is imperative black people have some form of sufficient self-care to ensure we are okay mentally/emotionally. Going out to 'get a drink' or getting drunk does not make your problems go away--its only a poor distraction. Most psychotropic drugs don't help mental illness--all it does is slow the person down in slow motion. Now some people may need it at times for manic depression but not all the time. We are so busy trying to be strong and independent but black suicide is on the rise. On a shallow note, love the hair!
Yes I know but me I drink sometimes but only in moerderation when I be at someones cookout or at the gathering or even at the picnic. But in my family they drink all the time even they be taking some durgs also! But me I don't take no durgs & plus I don't like to take no perspiction pain klliers because it will make you go nuts!
sweetchari wow are we the same person? also grew up with a black parent who's bipolar and in denial and is in and out of hospital. it's been really tough but everything you said really resonates with me
Wow I sorry you had to go through all that. I really wish black people would be open-minded on mental illness because I have my own struggle with anxiety and depression. And when you tell some of them the way they look at you is like almost as if you were a monster or something. It really sucks
Thanks for being such a beautiful person inside and out. It really rubs off on people who don't even know you and that says a lot❤️
Zoë Clarke Tower Weave
Thanks for being so vulnerable. I have seen a therapist for years too and it always shocks my friends. When I recommend seeking help to my friends who are struggling there answer is: "I'm not crazy" or "I can go to church". We need dialogue to break down these stigmas and walls because so many of us are suffering. What do you suggest from a mediation standpoint?
Look up Adriene Mischler's self-love meditation, or any of Julien Blanc's free youtube meditations.
My family has always been stressed out. Why would I throw my problems onto people that are always at the tipping point of a mental breakdowns themselves? Nobody has time for these problems. I feel like the terrible norm is to just keep going until it becomes the least of your problems.
Black women are beautiful.
I am an older woman who has suffered from depression since I was a child and although I'm not ashamed as much as I used to be. I talk about it more now than I used to and I can say that I don't feel well which usually means I'm having a bad day. I don't know if I can find any answers here for me but I am glad to see younger women stepping forward and reaching out to each other. Maybe you'll find some useful tools for handling it.
Celita Jamison going through this now. I hate this, dont wanna be judged.
This was an absolutely beautiful video. I'm so glad I came across your channel. I am going to share this with my clinical psychology class as an example for my project about TH-cam and depression. Thanks for sharing!
Thank you for sharing your story- you are speaking for a lot of us. And I respect your position on medication and although I am on meds right now- I think everyone out there needs to do whatever it is that keeps them alive and able to reach wellness.
The biggest misconception is thinking the " Strong Black Woman " trope that needs to be deconstructed. Being strong does not mean being invulnerable to pain and thinking that having to suffer somehow makes the pain more noble. It doesn't. Every time we share our stories and create spaces that others can be seen and heard is doing healing work.
You are not alone- and I guess that means I am not alone too. Peace and love
In understand what is the situation. And personally, as a white girl I wanted to know more about how you guys feel so i decided to watch this video. So I wanna say this: y'all beautiful... black, white, bej, brown...y'all good. I love you all. But dear black or brown sisters, don't hold it back. Teach your mama that she needs to let it out too. Holding in emotions is not good for nobody and I want my girls all over the world healed. Please take your time with yourselves and don t be ashamed. God doesn t want you to be ashamed. He wants you to be bold, brave, able to let ir out and so he can fix it for you.
P.S thank you Shela for being such an inspiration and helping so many people with your brilliant mind. Bless you!
Stefania Stefan thank you💗💗💗😢😢😢
This video is so refreshing. I've been dealing with it for some time now, but have found meditation and watching what I eat to be the best tools for me. Thank you for speaking out about this.
I love everything that you said in this video. Please share some of the mediation techniques that you've found to be helpful!
vly703 go lose weight
@@fatcat165 Judging from your profile pic, it's obvious you're a anti-black troll.
I am so happy to see your video. Black and Brown women need to understand they are still strong even if they have depression.
I try to keep myself busy but it still der....the depression, the shame, the loneliness, the sadness of never being loved
i am going to point out not as a black woman but a Puerto Rican who sees thing logically. I am a white skin Puerto Rican who did not fit in with whites, blacks and not even my own people so I had vented anger that I learned how to use it to touch my inner strength and have achieve my success and striving to do more with my relationship with GOD. I now set the example where ever I go or now. Does not matter because I learned to love myself. A long journey but finally. We are in a world striving to be different unique and find our own place. Black women are the only ones in the world with that type of hair. Skin like chocolate. Your soul is different and unique in the way you express that wonderful soul that GOD gave you and only you. When society tells you that you are not good enough it is because you are a threat to them. The shape of an hour glass. Instead of embracing this unique beauty you mimic everyone else and wear other peoples hair. Why? In Puerto Rico when you are interested in a woman you call her black. Negra if she is bangin and negrita if she is cute. However society shuns it because they do not want you to know that power and mesmerizing beauty you possess. They all want to get implants and fat suction to look like who? Oh yeah you. But you go and add more to your body to compete, but you are only competing against yourselves. Where do you find the most churches? Black neighborhoods. Every time someone tells you that you are not good enough that means they are threaten by your uniqueness. I have a lot on my plate but if I had the energy I would make this a journey and goal but for now I will let as many people on these sites know that I often stare at black woman and say to myself if only you knew the power, strength and threat you possess. Embrace your chocolate beauty as GOD made you specifically unique. if your angry or depressed use it to empower you. That uniqueness you were born with. Much love and GOD bless and let these women see who they are because society already knows. I would love to get into it but need to keep it short. i would like to tell you about Sarah Baartman and what happened and the impact she had in this world that would shock you unless you are aware of this story. God Bless you and I love you all.
I am an African American Hispanic Chinese Native American and I just recently discovered this about me and my family and I would love to connect with other black women regarding mental health and how to find the best counselor
I’d like to add to this conversation too, as a white woman with brown skinned friends and acquaintances, I see the stigma and shame of mental health issues in black culture, and it’s disheartening when I try to talk openly about it with my brown skinned friends and they laugh at me and push away my feelings and thoughts, I look at it as an opportunity for us to open up and connect with each other over something we are both struggling with, but a lot of times I am met with that attitude of “oh you white people”, and that honestly breaks my heart because I want to help and be a friend but that wall comes up and shuts me down and says “you can’t understand me, because you’re white and I’m black” but we can support one another through our struggles with mental health if we keep an open mind and heart, let’s keep these conversations going so we can all experience healing, women can empower themselves by opening up and getting honest...
Thank you, from the bottom of my heart thank you so much for making this video because I've been dealing with depression since I was 14 years old. I'm 20 now and I'm still dealing with it. And I don't think my family understands it.
Clinical medication effects different people in different ways. Just because your mom had a negative reaction to medication does not mean that all will be affected in that manner. Its is very dangerous to advise anyone with a mental health imbalance to just meditate it away. Meditation may work well for you and thats fine; however, many people who suffer from mental health imbalance do not fair well without the benefit of prescribed medication. Depending on the individual, going off meds or not taking meds at all can lead to very dangerous and harmful events including suicide. It is important that we do not add to the already existing stigma that surrounds mental health diagnosis by implying that prescribed medication is not a helpful or necessary treatment for it. That's just as irresponsible or insensitive as some saying... Lets just go to church and pray it away or...all you need is to go out and have some fun and a few drinks. That will snap you right out of it.
These are examples of some of worst adivice one can give to a person dealing with a diagnosed mental health disorder.
This video was very honest and I appreciate that. Me and some girlfriends are having an ongoing discussion about this very topic. Thank you
Very important to get help sooner than later. Excellent message!
At first I thought this was going to be some stupid racist rant on why white people can't be depressed. But props to you for addressing an actual problem. Much like many Asians are expected to be very successful, childhood prodigies. I never noticed that the whole empowerment movement actually has the downfalls of being expected to be invincible.
I enjoyed listening to your video just one thing i didnt agree with is when you started talking about meds. Some people work better with meds. That should be a personal choice.
Thank you so much for sharing! I've been struggling with severe depression and an eating disorder for 6 years and only at the end of 2016 did I finally tell my family and seek help. Since then I've been making leaps and bounds in my recovery, and that's largely due to the medication that I started. I tried therapy for several months and got absolutely nowhere, though thinking back on it, I feel that may have been due to my own inability to believe that I was worthy of recovery
In the first place, and no amount of talking could have changed my mind. That's when I decided to look into medication.
I've been taking 20mg of Lexapro for 6 months now and things couldn't be better.
I know it may not be for everyone, but for me, antidepressants have been a godsend and have changed my life in ways I couldn't have imagined. I feel like I can finally breathe and see beyond the fog that depression cast over my life, I have energy and motivation to get out and exercise again, I talk to my family and friends again, and more importantly, I'm actively planning for my future - and I'm excited about it!
For me it was an easy transition with very few side effects (sleepiness and some nausea for the first 3 days), but after that passed its been smooth sailing. I'm not saying this to push the route of medication on anyone, but for those thinking about it, maybe talk to your doctor or a psychiatrist (preferably) to see what options are available to you.
Best of luck to everyone who is struggling, stay strong and I hope you can find the help you need ❤️
Sydney.........medication should be taken with precaution, the reason being it leads to addiction and does not cure the problem, but only masks the problem. To effectively remove the problem you need to find the causes and confront them honestly and bravely. With all human problems follow this directive: THE WAY OUT IS THE WAY THROUGH.
This is a really valid. Thank you or sharing. Personally I have recently reached out as an adult for outside help and I am really glad that Shelah shared this.
What about just being neutral about how you feel? I think chasing the high of happiness is a low key problem too.
Thank you for the honesty, can you share some of your meditation stuff?!
Girl I love Positive Magazine meditations. I love her channel. Meditation has really helped me through some rough times. At first it was hard to do. But i've found that the stillness requires me to reconcile my trauma.
Omg thank you sooo much for this video I couldn't agree more I was on meds for about 3 years and I hated it I was always happy but deep down I felt like I was being controlled and like deep down I was sad even this my actions due to the meds said otherwise. Plz do a video of f what u do your overcome and what u do to meditate and how you got started I tried diff apps of meditation but I wasn't satisfied plz help
A few years ago, I was feeling what I thought was depression. I was struggling to cope with school , finding purpose and direction in life, I was suicidal and feeling hopeless. I grew up feeling uncomfortable expressing negative emotions with my parents but nonetheless I got the courage to ask for help and though money was tight, my mom took me to see a psychologist. When I got there I found that I was really struggling to communicate what I was feeling to the psychologist. At the end of my appointment, the psychologist told me “there is nothing wrong with you, you just need to make more friends ”. I felt like such a fraud and that I was seeking for attention. To make matters worse, when the bill came, my mom called me to show me how much they had charged her and I felt so guilty. To this day I still live with that guilt. I still struggle with what I think is depression and have suicidal ideations. These past two years have been particularly rough on me. I’ve gone to therapy by myself before but eventually quit. I don’t think I’ll have the courage to speak up again though, I just feel like an attention seeker and stupid when I do. So I guess I’ll have tough it out a little while longer.
Wow i’m so sorry you went through that and I hope things are better now 💝💝💝
I don’t know if this helps, but I went through a similar situation but the cause of my depression was my birth control pills. So if u are on the pills I’ll recommend to stop them immediately.
I hope things get better 💞
when you said that meditation allowed you to deal with the root of the problem vs the symptoms of it, i really heard you. im on medication now for the first time and im hoping it makes it easier for me to make meditation a habit. and i think you're right that being connected with yourself deeply through meditation will allow you to have longer and full moments of happiness that you're really really right
please share some of your meditation techniques!
Could u talk about lgbt peoples in the black community and how we as black women need to be more of ally’s to them? I see so much hate trans black women being killed and gays being bashed and I can’t help but notice it. Makes my heart hurt because my mama had kicked out my brother and I felt like I couldn’t do anything
I am in tears watching this because my depression has hit so hard this past week and I don't turn to anyone to talk because I feel like it's not something they want to talk about.. Besides that no one pays attention.. They don't want to hear about it which pushes me deeper.. It's just so tough going through this alone
@Alexis Bowe alright thank you
This has been going on with me for years and i have a dark complexion i dont even show my face on the internet im the oldest and my sister has been the strong one of the family.
Thank you for sharing! My sister circle including my daughter will be discussing this soon. ✨💜🙏🏾
I am so glad I found this.
As weird as this sounds( and I know Im not wierd but i know I wasnt the target audience), and i hope nobody minds this, but im an strait white male who has been going through a hard time in 2020 and have found some very good advice in this video. This is a very excellent video and a wonderful job on inspiration.
The worst bit is when you speak up, people try to make a joke out of your mental health or trauma making it worse.
Girl sometimes I. Feel like I'm Harriet Tubman living on a plantation.
The hate is too much.
Hey thanks for being transparent!!! I am having the same issues with my bipolar but haven't been treated...I skip out when it's medication time....
Yes please share the medicine that has helped you. I've gone through 6years of trial and error and still nothing helps..
Great video.......you spoke many truths
Can you do this series again?
Much needed video! Me and many family members suffer from depression but still people have no empathy for each other. It's become a who has suffered the most competition. I guess depression can make people feel every thing is worst for them! I now have a toddler daughter and I put my trust in God hour by hour to give me the energy and positive aura to get through each day. Please let me know what type of meditation and counselling you do. I am a single parent in England with only a drop of family support and I am so desperate to turn my life around. I wanted to get help with better help.com but couldn't afford it.
Meditation is a great way of pulling out the weeds in our heads, as opposed to taking medications that only remove the head of the weed instead of the root...
HEY GURL hey, we r gonna be on a panel together sometime in May, re: meditation and mental health. Looking forward to it.
Thanks for this video Queen. I dont have the shame part. Its definitely the not being understood part....most ppl i know rnt black women like myself or if they r unfortunately they r the negative ones who are comfortable in their misery. I just feel so isolated and nobody can or cares to understand me. That's where the silence comes in. I dont talk to ppl... They dont ask or care... And i Dont know a black woman therapist...cause i wouldnt want to talk to a white person for therapy or a male...
Either way i appreciate you SO much for putting this put here. Nobody cares for African women. We have to care for ourselves bc nobody is coming through to uplift us or have our backs smh. I genuinely believe being black AND a woman is an absolute curse.
I wish all of you Queens the BEST. Tha ks for being YOU and staying strong! 💪
_Glad this is being talked about I wish I could find more information.
I feel so alone , no purpose , & my life is passing me by. I wish I could heal instead of suffering in silence. I read a lot trying to ignore my problems but when the story is done ✅ I’m still silently suffering. 😟😟😟😟_
what types of meditation do you recommend?
What meditations do you practice?
st johns wort in the tincture is helpful.
hello what did you mean by changing someone's character by medication ?
thank you
Thank you so much for sharing your story! What are some meditation practices you use?
Great video. All true. Thankyou for sharing
Thank you. Thank you so much for this.
What type of meditation do you use or where would you recommend someone who has never done it to start ?
Thank you SO much for this. Just...thank you. 😓😓😓😓😓😓😓
Hi, just wanted to find out what type of meditation you are doing?
You're awesome. 100% agree. ❤️
Yes this is a serious issue. I been hiding it fir a long time. Im 41 yrs old divorced after 16 yrs and was a stay at home wife and mom and now I losy custody of my kids to my ex out of hurt he has. My kids are my life. I see them 2 time a month and I trt to stay strong but I have been so depressed anf its bad. I totally understand.
I feel like a failute to my kids if I let people know this.
Just lost right now.
God Bless you❤
I appreciate you. Learnt a lot. Keep the flag flying.
Can you post the meditation techniques you use?
thank you for your story and honesty.
Hey what kind of meditation do you use?
Chantal Clouden when you get an answer let me know as I'm curious as well
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU for this video 🙌🏾
Liking the hair. Let’s improve brown and black relations.
I don't get how mental health issues can be linked as a "black/brown girl" thing.
Most of these feelings mentioned relate to everyone.
It relates to everyone but when black women are depressed they aren't seen as vulnerable or needs help, we are seen as angry
Where's the meditation links?
I hope that you are well today🤍
Thanks for this.
This is how most PEOPLE with depression feel!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thank you goddess for sharing your experience
Sounds like me an I’m a white female. I did visit with a brown psychologist who thought I was fine. One visit. That’s it. But yeah meditation over medication is great. Any kind of exercise helps too. Just keep busy doing happy 😊 good things. And prayer 🙏
very good breakdown of what goes on in a blackwoman's life🙂
That was amazing....it is true what u said. I think I may need help cause I suffer from depression. I was molested when I was 15 by my dad. At age 22 and pregnant with my now 14 year old son was almost raped by a male best friend. Because of my outside appearance I was tormented. Never been in a serious relationship, never been loved accepted, always wanted to get married but know that nobody would ever want me. My looks is between a model/ transgender but I am a female. Men only talk to me for sex. I am 36 and have had 35 sexual partners but I got tested. I was always and still am single. I slept with these men thinking that they would make me Dee girlfriend but after the sex they bounce. I was and still am so desperate to be loved, to trust, to be appreciated, accepted, embraced. I cuss and scream at my son and use to physically abuse him until I learned what abuse was and I stopped. I don't have a healthy relationship with my dad nor my family. They degrade, scorn and humiliates me every chance they get. I use to depend on them and they treated me like crap
I’m so sorry. I’m sending you so much love and healing energy ❤️
This video is perfect for me at the moment...
Finally something I can relate to
Is anxiety and depression different in Black Women comparing to Asian or White?
This is not to distract from the topic. I'm a bit older; mid 30's...She opened the video saying brown girls despite the title, are black women referring to themselves as brown now?
krackedbanana she was referring to the Latino/ Hispanic population. Some refer to native Americans as brown too.
what are some of your meditations
Thank you for this😢
people are a little shocked that a good looking person such as yourself can have depression but there are different underlying causes and it can happen to anyone...
Your depression stems from defining yourself by the color of your skin.
"HI- BY GOLLY TALK TO SOMEONE TRY MANY NEW ACTIVITIE'S MAYBE BECOME A PRODUCT TESTER SOLACE YOUR WAY!!" JASON BUTZ 51 ARTWORK