The thing is, people like the Transformed Wife will usually reply and say, “Yes gender roles are innate, but it’s because of feminist media that brainwashes you” or some shit.
She looks and talks like the witch who was my son's Special Ed teacher in kindergarten and 1st grade. We butted heads a LOT over her terrible treatment of those children. This was 1999, my son was seven years old and LOVED Star Wars movies. The new one, "Phantom Menace" had just come out, the one where Anakin Skywalker is a little boy with supernatural powers. This teacher called a meeting with me for the purpose of telling me NOT to let my son see this movie because "It is too empowering for children". Since when is empowering children a bad thing? My son's beloved grandfather had been murdered 3 years before this, and he could sure use some "empowerment" as far as I was concerned. Our meeting was at the end of the school day, so I loved seeing that smug look on her face disappear as I hugged my little boy and said, "We are going to go see that new "Star Wars" movie, right now!" We did, and went out for pizza right after that. He talked about what a great day that was for years.
Lol no kidding not to mention one who thinks beating children, even ones who can't understand language yet, is good. Physically beating children with objects. Barely born, nursing Infants to preteens get physical punishment.
@@mattmammone2338 unfortunately, that's doubtful. Christian fundamentalism has very strongly adopted the "joyfully (sexually) available" rhetoric, so many people within the culture don't have the awareness or beliefs to frame nonconsensual sex as harmful.
Something I am proud of: I submitted a lab report that was due this week and I wasn't even burnt out afterwards! It was something I was supposed to be working on for 4 weeks, and I procrastinated, but I was able to submit it on time and go about the rest of my week. Have a great day Mickey, thanks for the Saturday content
I am so glad to see you covering this. I was raised in a extremely simular environment, taught a lot of the same things and escaped in my 20's. I have been working with counseling for YEARS to undo the damage and break the cycle. You are very right about the fringes being very anti-science, anti-evidence and basing thier entire existence off of one source. Christianity, Science, and common sense do not have to be, and should not be, mutually exclusive.
Hi fellow escapee! I don’t know you but knowing someone else made it out of this stuff always makes me so happy. Yay for counseling and not letting them destroy us despite how hard they tried!
I got out too! It's so nice to see people celebrating escaping this way of thinking. I feel like I'm crazy when I try to describe what it was like to someone who didn't live it.
@@bretthansen3739 Glad you got out too! I totally feel you on that. I have to be very specific in my wording of what it was like and bring up certain incidents to get my point across. I hope you are healing well 🙏
Something we're proud of? Well I managed to read a book for an hour straight. My concentration recently has been really bad and at times I can't even read for 10 minutes without getting distracted. So yeah I felt proud for doing that hour
Adult child of certified wing nuts here! I can't tell you how grateful I am for channels like yours, especially working through childhood trauma as the mama of a young trans child, that is thriving and knows she is loved unconditionally 💕🌈
Thank you for the last part about invading privacy of children! My upbringing was extremely traumatic and there were no such thing as boundaries (I had no door to my room, there was screen sharing software on my computer that allowed remote access to it at any time, all of my conversations on the landline were monitored, my room was rummaged through when I was at school, etc). It never taught me to be “good” - I just learned to be terrified of being caught and better at being sneaky. Now, I’m a parent of a 9 year old boy. I knock and wait before entering his room, make sure he knows his space is his own, and don’t go snooping through his things outside of making sure he’s not video calling memaw without asking her first. We have a good relationship built on mutual trust. I can’t imagine inflicting the kind of invasive parenting I endured because “it’s how I was raised” or something. I started a new job a couple weeks ago and finished training this week. I feel prepared for success and I’m excited!
I completely relate to this!! It’s really tough to deal with that trauma, and to create a safe space for yourself after having absolutely zero privacy. Congrats on the job!! ❤️
Now that you mention such things, I recall back in the 1990's, evangelical fundamentalism's salad days, when home schooling became popular, that the folks my friend worked for often brought their kids to work - they were not allowed to shut the bathroom door. One such adult who came to install an appliance in my house, also did not shut the bathroom door - In my house.
14:21 I can actually share my experience with this. My mom has gone through my phone multiple times before (not anymore). We have had arguments and I almost got thrown out. Because she kept going though my phone I have a paranoia problem. I feel like I can't leave my phone in the same room with her. I do not like being alone with her in a room or a car ride. I constantly feel like I am being watched and I double or triple check my surroundings. I wake up in the middle of the night panicking over if I logged out of my social medias and Google account. I do not feel safe in my own home...please listen to her when she is talking about this it actually effects your child and their perceptions of you
Are you still in the home with your mother? This sounds like an unhealthy situation for you. Can you speak to another family member or a trusted teacher about this situation? Perhaps they can help you if you are still a minor. Don't hesitate to reach out just because this is the way it's always been. It's not right and something needs to change.
I really hope you can make a change quickly the only reason I say that is my stepmother has cameras and microphones all over the house she listens to our conversations I could go on and on but take care of your mental health please
My daughter is 16. I absolutely will not go through her room or her phone. I've had other parents tell me I am naive, but I want her to have her privacy and her safe place.
You’re being a good mother by giving your child that privacy, and teaching them it’s important to have boundaries. My mother would always be looking through my phone, and other private things like journals. I thought that was normal because my friends parents did similar things.
I like how she blocks replies on her Twitter posts. She just likes to preach - she has no interest in anyone's thoughts except her own. I guess it's safe being ignorant.
Transformed wife: children's life should be filled with happiness and laughter Also her: Has talked extensively about how you should beat your children and even tells parents to be extremely controlling in the next sentence
Something I’m proud of: my mom was trying to guilt me into talking to my sister and I stood up for myself and said why would I reach out to a person who is constantly trying to make me feel bad about myself? Also, if she really wanted to talk to me than she could reach out. It is really hard, but thanks to your videos I have gotten better at maintaining boundaries. Thank you! (Context: I moved out of state and it got really really ugly before I left because my sister was wanting to control me and not wanting me to move in a very toxic way🙃)
Something I'm proud of: I just finished a Christmas gift for my sister!! I made a Winter capelet for her (hood and 4 pockets included!!) that's reversible. One side is a burgundy flannel and the other is a purple cotton print with tiny moons and stars, there is a sherpa layer in the middle to make it super warm :) The white sherpa acts as a trim along the hood and down the front, it ends around her elbows. Now I'm working on little pillows for a friend, shaped like a ghost, a bat, and then a basic square pillow all with really cute halloween-y cotton fabrics. I'm planning so many sewing projects for Xmas I only hope I can get them all done haha
That sounds super comfy and nice! I have a lot of sewing projects planned too, and so far the most I've done was organize it into piles and iron some of it...and that took HOURS.
The Transformed wife is frustrating to learn about. So for my comment, I'm really proud of being an ex smoker for a higher percentage of 2021 than I was a smoker!
On this front, I'm proud that I haven't had a tobacco product in 2 weeks. Unfortunately, I have yet to kick the nicotine addiction and oral fixation aspects of my smoking.
have you seen the stuff about her not believing marital r*pe exists, and i believe someone asked her for advice about a situation that sounded like just that, and she was like "would you want your husband to go to prison?" or something?? 😞so disturbing and harmful
"I don't teach marital rape. I just preach to abused wives that they're the problem and manipulate them into retracting allegations against their abusive partners! They're totally different things!"
Watching these videos constantly reaffirms for me that I made the right decision to leave the strict christianity I was raised in. This brings up so many memories of lessons I was taught. My mother was always submissive to my father in decisions. They might discuss something for a little bit, but once he made a decision I would see her bite her tongue and shut up on the subject, even if she knew more about it, even if she wasn't done telling him info about the situation, even if she believed deep down that it was the wrong choice. When I was working on our wedding vows with my husband, my mom pointedly reminded me that at her wedding she had vowed to obey her husband as the head of the family. She wanted me to do the same, even though I had made my feelings on that clear years ago. My husband suggested we instead include the following, and I'm so happy we did (I forget exactly how it was worded but anyway) We vowed to respect each other as equals in our relationship and to always consider each other and come together in making decisions. I had joy in my heart to read it in front of my family and to break free from that generational curse.
With walking intervals, because that's how I like to do it, I did a total of 48 minutes of running this morning! I am a proud fat athlete or fathlete and I love your fat positivity, Mickey! Once I learned that I didn't need to worry about diet culture bullshit, movement for its own sake got a lot more fun and it makes me happy!
I'm proud of myself because I went to my work's holiday party even when my usual social anxiety started to kick in...and I ended up having a lot of fun and winning a gift card to Target and an annual pass to all the National Parks and such. ^.^ It feels like I was rewarded for sticking to my plans and it feels really good.
When I was a young teenager I was told I was to sensitive. I literally remember turning my sadness into anger. Why is it more okay to be angry all the time then sensitive. I've since been in therapy dealing with this but my first instinct when any kind of upset is to get angry.
I'm glad you kept in the one about privacy. I was in many ways extremely sheltered and invaded by my fundamentalist mother. It harmed me. I'm very thankful I have the space and a supportive husband and therapist to work on recovering and healing.
Ever wonder why fundamentalists seem to have such weak beliefs that they fear their children abandoning their authoritarian branch of Christianity if they ever learn that other beliefs exist outside their own caricature of what they look like?
This week, I was home alone while my parents were looking at houses in the Houston area. I managed to get almost everything I wanted to get done actually finished, and I barely needed reminders for myself for once! It was really nice to feel that sense of accomplishment.
Serious congrats, I struggle sooooooo badly with the polite-part. Can't say for you, but for me, that's something to throw a party over. Really, you have every reason to be proud of yourself.
Something I did this week that I'm proud of/happy with.. I went to an actual therapist for the first time ever. I'm finally taking steps to deal with my childhood trauma and abuse.
Something I'm Proud Of: I was feeling sick, so, I stayed in bed and watched Golden Girls on my iPad. It's very difficult for me to let myself slow down and not think I'm lazy for wanting to relax. It was very nice. 😊🌷🌼
Something to be proud of: I was writing a story for the last 11 months and finally found the corage to get it online. I'm not so certain that the story is good enough, but I like it nonetheless, so I gave it a go. It was really good because I was given 3 amazing reviews that made me smile a lot.
That's awesome! It takes so much courage to put yourself out there like that, you totally deserve to feel pride in what you accomplished! Congratulations on your positive reviews!
Lori Alexander is not qualified to talk about soup, let alone mental health. Also I guarantee she did not read that psychology article she only read the headline which probably took her 4 1/2 hours to sound out.
Thank you for this!! Something I did that I'm proud of: Yesterday I set a boundary with a friend who continually takes advantage of my kindness and basically makes me into her therapist. I refused to compromise my mental health and had a relaxing evening with my bf instead. Yay!
What I’m proud of: I finally finished year 11!! this year was rough, in the past 2 months the boy i was seeing left me, my grandpa died and my parents separated. On top of this school was shit and the punches kept coming. But I finished! I’m proud of myself for sticking it out.
I'm so sorry that you've had to endure that much turmoil :( but I'm proud of you, too, for finishing the school year, despite everything! Wishing you brighter days ahead, hun! 🙏🏽❤️✨
I just found your channel and I love it! In response to children in particular: after growing up a controlling home with a parent who was just ... ugh. All it did was MAKE ME A BETTER LIAR. I made double sure that I did not continue that environment with my son. He's 16, amazing, and we have a wonderful relationship. I wish he'd clean up after himself better and be more proactive with his homework but he's a testimant to what can happen if you treat kids like you would like to be treated.
I'm convinced that the Transformed Wife is miserable and instead of just admitting it, she's trying to convince everyone else to be miserable with her. No thank you.
I appreciate this video so much, for reasons that feel too heavy to get into here. (I survived a fundamentalist upbringing and currently live at home again--briefly, I hope.) BUT! A thing I'm proud of is that I created a lucet fork, purely on a whim, out of silver and gold jewelry wire, and learned how to make I cord for my crochet projects. I'm amazed it worked!
Thank you for these videos. I grew up in an excessively Baptist household and my mom is still upset with me that I’m not a stay at home mom. I’m 46. I’m proud of myself because I just sent 3 boxes of scarves that I crocheted to a friend in Virginia and she will give them to homeless kids for Christmas 💜💜💜
My fundamentally Christian friends tried to pray my anxiety and depression away and laid hands on my and prayed in gibberish to get “my demons” away. It obviously didn’t work and I felt even more depressed because I thought I had demons in me and I wasn’t strong enough to get them out. They also told me I shouldn’t take meds and instead keep praying and do a deliverance aka exorcism… like wtf. And is as that desperate that I went with it..
I finally got a lyme diagnosis which seams like not a good thing but it's answers which we've been trying to get for years. Also, I am recording my own podcast about living with disorders and disabilities which I'm very excited about. Collectively, those of us with disorders and disabilities make a larger percentage of the population than those who are "normal" and healthy. But as a disabled and disordered person, I've found that it's not socially acceptable to talk about it -- even though struggling with this stuff is the norm. So we are going to talk about it. I also think a collaboration with Jen and James from Fundy Fridays would be AMAZING.
That’s wonderful! I definitely think the podcast I; particular is nice. As someone with several disabilities and disorders, it definitely feels sort of “forbidden” to talk about until it’s actively brought up, and it’s good to hear you’re putting information out there!
As a disabled person, that's so cool! I feel like mental illness in particular is often swept under the rug with disabled people because we are already expected to have such a low quality of life., Super sad, and it needs to change.
Thank you for the encouragement! You made my day. ❤💗❤ (I rarely get replies to my YT comments 😍.) I cannot wait to share my podcast with the world. Currently working on my first episode. 💪
Personally, this week I finally went to the doctor to address what’s going on that’s making me fatigued constantly. I’ve been this way for a couple years and I physically need to sleep 14 hours a day. On my way to finding a cause I hope. ❤️
Good for you! Asking for help from medical professionals and going through the process is daunting but necessary. Keep advocating for yourself. Hopefully you have a support person that can go on this journey with you too.
I hope you find answers! I felt a similar way quite a while back and was diagnosed with chronic fatigue syndrome. Once you know the cause you can start tackling it!
@@nyanbinary1717 that's great I'm glad you're taking control we all need help now and then when I retired from my job I could not get out of bed for a month that is how much stress I was under take your time do the things you want to do I'm just roll with things you feel like playing with makeup one day then do it give your body and mind sometime to heal super happy for you
Something I'm proud: I cooked delicious tuna pasta and ate 3 full meals today. I'm in university and I slack off cooking proper food. Also when you read the tweet about "shaming women" I said what seconds before you did😂equally as shocked.
I’m proud of the fact I had my first therapy appointment this week. I have been dealing with severe depression brought on by unresolved childhood trauma. It gets really bad in the winter and earlier this week I hit a low. I ended up crying most of the night and then got myself up in the morning, researched therapists in my area and made the appointment. My new therapist was able to get me in 2 days later and it was AMAZING. I felt so much lighter afterwards and I’m excited to see the progress we make with my healing.
The post about protecting children from the sins of society made me think of Kellogg (cornflakes) telling the public that parents should bust into their children’s rooms and touch their genitals to catch them masturbating, because “self pollution is a crime doubly abominable”. When you insist on banning all contact with the ‘sinful’ parts of society from your children’s lives and using shame for participation in them, you are conditioning the child to attach shame to those actions, making them feel dirty. Like in the Josh Duggar scandals, instead of his parents realizing porn is a normal part of a teenage boy’s mind and teaching him that porn is not realistic and what a healthy sexual relationship should be, they banned porn all together. And that led to him abusing his sisters and later, becoming a pedophile. LET ME MAKE THIS CLEAR: creating shame around porn/sex and banning it from your household will not make your child a molestor/pedophile! BUT when a boy who knows nothing of what realistic, normal sex outside of marriage in our society looks like and then is barraged with “watch me f*ck my step sister” titles on porn pages, which are the most common types that pop up first on any porn page, obviously he believed this is just what people do. Instead of believing they can prevent the child from ever coming in contact with these sinful aspects of society, parents should open up conversations to talk about and educate their child on topics like this.
Kristen from GD 2021 conference and podcast spoke on how anxiety is about and because “your a sinner” “who is not obeying the Lordddd”. Ugh! I just can’t. No wonder I was a wreck during the years I was involved in Christianity.
@@MickeyAtkins She did and I’m working hard on the triggers and sometimes listen to them to gain a greater understanding of where my head and heart were for way, way to long. Sigh. I’ve had anxiety since I was a little girl and I’m telling ya I nearly lost my mind in religion. Self forgiveness is real work as I’m sure you know. Of course learning and implementing my priceless tools ⚒️ 🧰 is also key to getting on the other side of fundamental Christianity.
@@brendasmith7345 - same. I don't remember a time in my life when I wasn't anxious. This developed into depression as well as I got older. The clear message I got through all of this was that it was my fault for not trusting gawd enough. Apparently it had nothing to do with me having undiagnosed ADHD (diagnosed at 31) and living with my abusive, alcoholic father, and my mother who enables him. Interestingly, I was diagnosed at 31 and also commenced therapy at that time. I was done with church and religion by 38.
@@Luubelaar 💚💗✨💗✨. I too had parents that were alcoholic. Grandparents even worse crap going on so totally makes sense I was anxious. Nothing at ALL to do with what a horrible sinner I am. I’m so happy we both escaped from the toxic and dangerous situations including the crazy religion.
@@MickeyAtkins p..s. If your interested in taking a listen👂 to their podcast it’s episode #43 ..The Girl Defined Show. 3 Truths for fighting fear, anxiety and worry. It’s horrible.
Something I was proud of: I'm in a very anxious phase rn, everythings a bit loopsided, so I flip my sh*t all the time over the most minor things and can't stop crying. But this week I managed to get my to-do-list done anyway, and without pushing myself, but simply by letting my emotions run their course, give myself enough space to figure out the actual issue, and approaching a solution on how to handle it, and all in time enough to be where I had to be, while barely running late, ever. It's hilarious, but I'm super proud of myself.
It's funny that she says that "God's ways" are perfect and infallible, and yet they are always reinterpreting what the Bible says. Let alone the fact that "God's word" has been translated and even drastically altered over the years. :/
Something I‘m proud of: I felt really down today, had no energy and felt tired (usually signs for me that a depressiv phase is coming) so I cooked a nice meal for myself and finally decorated my flat for Christmas to keep myself busy. And it helped a lot! I’m not tired anymore and I’m motivated to actually do something again. I‘m proud of myself for not „giving in“ to feeling down today.
Something I'm proud of today: I actually had the energy, after being depressed for a couple weeks from my kitten running away, to make three batches of cookie dough. One batch is gingerbread and two are sugar cookie. One of the batches of sugar cookie is being split in half to go to two different places: the fire department right down our street and our AutoZone we go to (my dad's a mechanic and they're always helping him with discounts and such). I still miss my kitten terribly, and it's extremely difficult to just continue on, but baking does help sometimes. I hope you're doing well and have some special times during this holiday season!
I don't have something I'm proud of but I do have something that made me happy. My kitten's stroller training is going so well that we went on several walks this week. She now jumps into the stroller when I get home from work so we can go on walkies. Referring back to the video, whenever I have conversations with individuals about separation of church and state, The Transformed Wife is one of my go to's to demonstrate who exactly I'm talking about. Most don't know about her but when they learn who she is and the message she's spreading, they always give her content a big yikes.
With 3 more assignments to finish today and tomorrow I will be finished with my first quarter of graduate school for my LMFT masters! Thank you Mickey your videos were part of what inspired me to take the leap and go back to school 🏫
Definitely want to see you take on her youtube videos!!! In the meantime, I'm really proud of finishing a cardboard cat couch for my new kitten, especially since she loves it so much she spent the first day after it was done refusing to come out of it. :)
Here's a mental health win for this week: this week I was proud of myself for being able to openly verbalize my intimacy needs with my spouse. We've come a long way in our therapy journey 🥰
I'm proud of myself this week for actually getting some writing done. This past year or two I've barely written anything and I'm starting to get back in the habit.
13:59 she didn't read the article, she probably just saw the tile and was like, "they are hating on men!" And made assumptions and shared it instead of actually reading it because if she had, she might have realized that the article is caring toward men.
Yeah she didn't read Jinger or Jill Duggar's books either but claimed they both "threw their parents under the bus". I called her out on it and she just deleted my comments, lol, she's not a real deep thinker
to be honest, I think I have a right to talk about parenthood as a former child lol. it sounds bizarre to me when I say "you shouldn't do that my parents did that and it fvcked me up" and they say "ARE YOU A PARENT?????" no but I know what not to do because I WAS A KID AT ONE POINT
Found you through Fundie Friday’s! I know you’re not a replacement to my regular therapy but you have made me learn a lot of things about myself already! Thank you 😊
Ah, yes. The Trashformed Wife! Where everything she says is nothing but trash. 🗑💩☠️ Something I did this past week that made me feel really good about myself- I made absolutely delicious, homemade buttermilk pancakes, all from scratch! They were sooo good! And, last night, I made my first pumpkin pie, too. (The filling was all from scratch, but not the pie crust- I used Pillsbury pie dough out of convenience, lol. Mastering homemade pie crust will come soon though. 😊) I’ll also be making a homemade coconut pecan pie in the next couple days here, so I’m pretty excited about that, as well. 💜 I love baking and cooking, so when I make delicious food, I always feel really good about myself! I definitely love eating delicious food, but I also really love sharing great food with my loved ones, too. 💖
I feel so sorry for her children I mean my Dad could be a real prick sometimes but he never took away our privacy or freedoms and always trusted us enough to make our own decisions and as a result me and my brothers have an open and healthy relationship with him. I swear some people just think their kids are too stupid to function. Something I'm proud of: my vege garden is going off! The grocery bill can suck it!
The section about giving kids privacy is so so important to me. As far back as i can remember my parents were big on giving me choices and knocking before entering my room and stuff like that. I didn't realize how important that was and how many bullets i dodged until i started to see how my friends parents acted. Like your kids human and deserving of human rights.
Something I'm proud of? I'm reading a science fiction that is waaay heavy on the science. I don't understand half of what is going on but I haven't given up on it yet, so yay.
I mean yes, childhood should be a safe and happy time filled with consistent love and the ability to trust their adults. But part of that love and trust is also trusting them enough to allow them to have time alone with their own mind and their own thoughts and feelings. And it also involves respecting them enough to expose them in an age appropriate way to the things they will need to know to be functional and safe in the world they’re aging into. We’re parenting children because we’re raising adults.
When I was young, my family had very fundamentalist beliefs. They don’t remember a lot of the screwed up things said anymore, but I sure do. It always felt wrong to me.
A lady I knew many years ago told me that a year before, her daughter liked Justin Beiber and had stopped listening now but if she (the daughter) still did then she (the mother) would ban it. Not discussing if he is good or not, just sayin when I was 15, if my mother told me I couldn't listen to something, I would every second I was out of the house SIMPLY TO BE A BRAT. Which also brings up the point, if you give abstinence-only sex-ed, I was far from the only teen with the attitude "I'm gunna do that thing PURELY BECAUSE you told me not to."
@@DrDoerk while I'm firm on spankings being abuse, I think hitting a 2 year old with a strap especially not just on the bum, for hours (her original video said for hours, changed after backlash), crosses a line past spanking
@Dr. Doerk call it what you want, but corporal punishment is still demonstrated to be abusive and ineffective as a parenting tool. You don't get to have an opinion about things we have empirical evidence for.
Something I'm proud of: Recently, I was incredibly depressed/dysphoric. My friends reached out to me and instead of resorting to unhealthy coping mechanisms that I have it the past, I allowed them to help distract and comfort me. I know that might not be a big thing for others but for me I often push people away in those moments out of fear...fear that I'll be seen as weak...fear that I'll be a burden...but this time I didn't and I was better for it. I'm lucky to have such amazing friends and I'm proud of myself for letting them in.
I Havw been changing my view about the appropriate and beneficial way to raise my 3 kids over the last few months. I was raised in a home where I had no privacy, respect or boundaries and it didn’t matter how I felt about it. As a parent now, I can’t imagine treating my kids like their boundaries and privacy don’t matter.
I moved from Budapest to Vienna this Tuesday and started at my new job. It was stressful but I managed to do it without a major breakdown and was able remind myself to only focus on the step ahead of me, so it significantly lowered my anxiety, and I'm proud that I could handle it way better than I used to handle major events like this in the past. It means I'm growing, right?
Something I’m proud of: I submitted a short story for a yearly anthology this week. I’ve been working towards it and honing my skills since I was a kid (I’m 24 now, turning 25 in 2 months). It has just always been scary due to social anxiety, low self esteem and other things. I’ve been dreaming about doing it for so long, and I finally did it. The publishers will give me feed back and a response (yay or nay) somewhere around the beginning of March. Just doing it felt like a victory of sorts, and I don’t feel like the result will be the most important thing right now. I’m just happy about “taking the leap”. It makes me feel like I can actually accomplish things, because trying feels a little less scary.
Got so excited to see your name pop up on my phone! Thank you for all your work and giving me (and probably others here, lol) somewhere to take a break and laugh. Love it here. 💕💕
A relationship with my mother was built on this toxicity. My marriage is ending because of a similarly perpetuated narrative that has left me feeling guilty about buying a new pair of shoes or asserting my independence. This video resonated with me in so many ways. Thank you.
It makes me so mad that it is so important to these people how someone acts on the surface and no one cares about the cost to that person. And later when they cannot cope anymore it is their fault for not being "godly enough". My best friend scared me into fundamental Christianity when I was like 12 and it has taken me more than 10 years to get over that. This stuff is so dangerous and it makes me soo mad.
Pastor kid here. Growing up, I heard so many times from my Dad how the Fundies were giving us all a bad name and just need to stop talking. This is even more true today. UGH.
Something I’m proud of? I built a handcrank bike this week all on my own. I have a three wheeled scooter (because CP) and now I also have a three wheeled bike! I bought it for exercise reasons, and it will give me some chest strength and exercise time. I felt very handy! (And the spaghetti bolognese and tiramisu afterward didn’t hurt either ;)
Just read something about Dutch children being the happiest of all surveyed in the world, and apparently Dutch parents tend to not shame their children, are open-minded, etc. Follow the evidence...
I saw you taking on the Transformed Wife and thought I couldn't love you more. Then I spotted the plumbob piece of artwork on your wall. Dag dag! I am watching this video while organizing my mods for Sims 2!
I’m proud of myself for getting through this week and turning in a big paper that I’ve been worrying about for weeks. Now, on to the next ones…the end of the semester can’t come soon enough 😫 but I didn’t think that I would accomplish getting this turned in, and I did it. :)
I am finally able to practice full sets of nail extensions on my own hands and wear them! (Something I am proud of) In between making nail polish and acrylic swatches, I have been learning and practicing nail/cuticle prep and acrylic application for nail extensions. I am in the early stages of learning to become a nail technician🖤💀🖤
I'm always feeling like I'm not meeting the bar at work and was going to leave my department. 2 days ago the person who is launching the second office of our dept across the country, said they really wanted me to start it with them and they didn't ask me earlier because I sounded excited for the change in depts. I am having major imposter syndrome 🙃
I love your patient's art gallery behind you, and would love to know the stories behind them. My son (29 with schizophrenia) and I have started going to an art therapy group once a week and it's been very fulfilling and a great outlet for things we don't have words for. I have had depression since childhood, 4 years ago I had a 5150 because my therapist over-reacted and thought I was going to kill myself, partly because he heard me singing the old blues song "Trouble In Mind" (the Nina Simone version) "I'm gonna lay my head On some lonesome railroad line Let the 2: 19 train Ease my troubled mind Trouble in mind, I'm blue But I won't be blue always 'Cause the sun's gonna shine In my back door some day..." I wasn't really going to do it, but singing sad songs actually makes me feel better at times!
Doesn't sing and listen to sad music when you're feeling off and sad yourself make everyone feel better? It's like a good cry, you lean into the emotion, let it run through you, and come out relieved and breathing freer on the other side. And like getting a hug from someone who is compassionate, music and sad songs feel like someone else in the world is sharing your emotions, so you're not alone, and it's okay to feel that way for now, and the shame vanishes into thin air. Isn't that the while purpose off these sorta songs? Seriously, I'm neurodivergent, did I miss something?
When I was 14 years old, I confided to a therapist that I was having suicidal thoughts. As a result, I ended up being institionalized. That in and of itself was a very traumatic experience, but during my stay I ended up being sexually abused. As a result, I have never been able to fully trust, or open up to a therapist again. And if I were to ever find myself in a dark place like that again, I would not feel safe reaching out for help, for fear of being locked up again. I just wonder how many people out there who are suffering from depression, don't seek help for fear of being hospitalized against their will.
But Mickey, Lori just wants to save us all from enjoying ourselfs to much. God might get jealous and send us to hell if we smile to much. Jokes aside, thank you for covering this type of content. There are plenty of ex-cult/fundie/religious creators covering and debunking this kind of BS, but it's really great to hear an actual professional take on this.
Love your comment idea this week! Big fan. Love your videos. Your message is always so wonderful and you are so informative. Today was the completion of week four of six for my dog training certification. I'm so excited to start this job because it's literally everything I ever wanted and training has been so much fun. This was also the first day I didn't feel imposter syndrome walking out of the "office" I hope you are enjoying the cooler weather in the sunshine state!
The fact that I'm here shows how effective you are. Every vid I watch of yours I cry and have flashbacks, and yet I keep coming back bc you when you laugh at how "cucu bananas" something is, I feel validated. Plus you are informative and adorable❤ Let's just say, my parents follow all the televangelists and think the Westboro Church have a lot of good things to say...
I am proud of myself today for how I communicated with my partner. He is really stressed and took out his stress in an anger outburst towards me. I was able to tell him I was hurt and that I needed a minute, and then when we were both calm I told him what it was that hurt me and we talked about how he can be better and how I can be better. It felt so good to have a healthy communication about it and set boundaries
I have been binge watching all your videos. I am currently dealing with soon much childhood trauma, and it's making me realize how bad it is. I have always felt misunderstood because I was "too sensitive" but your videos help me feel understood and heard
Aaa this is weird, but I’m very proud of establishing a boundary in a conversation. I told them “hey let’s stop, we’re both winding each other up” and it worked! It feels so refreshing and I’m really proud of only moving my self on!
The only thing that comes from enforcing this strict surveillance on kids is making them better at hiding what they're doing, and more afraid to come to you if something DOES go wrong. Not to go into a lot of detail but, when I was being assaulted by multiple different men online at the age of 14, I didn't feel safe enough to go to my parents and talk about what was wrong. And in turn that was used as a threat for why I couldn't stop it on my own. On a lighter note, I'm proud of myself for organizing for my wife to come down and visit me this Christmas. My wife is a resident of Denmark and I'm a resident of the USA, so it's always really nice to be able to get to spend time with them in person.
Something I’m proud of: setting boundaries at work and sticking to them! 👏🏼 sometimes tricky to do in a new position as a recently graduated healthcare provider… but so worth it!
Something I’m proud of; I went through a shitty breakup and I was shattered. I’m proud that I’ve been coping in a good way. I have thought about engaging in risky behaviour but I’ve curbed those thoughts with other things I enjoy doing
I am going to finally get a therapist sooner rather than later. At least we have planned for that. I finally, after six years of knowing I need a therapist, got the balls not to simply just mention needing a therapist and actually push for getting a therapist. Which was a bit of an argument. Since I've had this talk about getting a therapist with my mom (who is only doing this so I have "no more excuses" as to why I can't keep up with life [i.e. failing almost all of my college classes this semester bc of a complex multitude of reasons]), I've felt a lot better, more hopeful overall. I am doing my research for therapists in my area, that take the insurance I'm covered under. I've found three that may be helpful, and they all do online therapy. I have to send emails, and I'm super anxious and excited for all of this at the same time. I just wanted to share this here because I kinda need to. I'm still worried how this is going to work out, and I don't know what's gonna happen really. Also I'm still working on my futuristic fantasy scifi dystopian (?) novel. Still in the process of doing research in the cultural backgrounds for my characters, but it fills very fulfilling for me to finally be working on an original story that I have been intermittently returning to add to ever so often. It's still very much in the beginning stages because I have so much I need to mentally and physically attend to, but when I get these bursts of creativity and energy, it's really good to me. I've been working on this for over a year now, and it's really what I want to do. So I'm proud of myself for pulling it back out to work on.
Thank you so much for this message. I was also fed into this community by these people when I was in a vulnerable spot in my life. I have come out of that phase but the amount of shit I've had to deal with is a consequence of the mindset that I had due these religious people. I was 16 and this ruined so much of my time. I hope nobody falls into their traps because it is an awful world to live in with their mindset. Again, thank you so much. I wish I had found this channel when I most needed it but I found it just in time. This channel helps so much when you dont have access to therapy. I have learnt so much from here. Thank you.
These people are like “facts don’t care about your feelings,” but yet they forget that “feeling” don’t care about their “facts.” Also being rude and bombastic does not equal correct.
In response to one of the earliest tweets (maybe first), you pointed out some of the negative effects of shame, including damaged self esteem. For people like Lori, this isn't a down side to weigh against the good. It's just more good. These groups want your self esteem low and your decision making compromised. They see those states as virtuous. (It might sound like I'm mocking them, I'm not. I was raised in a theologically similar church, and I'm still unpacking the damage 20 years later)
Sorry, bad short term memory so I can't "save up" my comments to the end. You talked about the lack if privacy being bad for healthy parent/child relationships. Healthy is not their goal. Their goal is to model the relationship you are supposed to have with God (or the state): They are better than you, and your job is to obey. I saw a piece of advice on this topic (I think from Focus on the Family) that explained that you shouldn't try to reason with your children because it can teach them to think before obeying.
I've heard this before, and it may not be scientifically proven, but I still think it's true: authoritarian parenting doesn't raise kids who follow the rules, it raises kids who become really good at breaking the rules.
She seems like an empty person. Like I look in her eyes (on a video for example) and she doesn't look happy, emotionally healthy, content, etc. Having come out of an IFB cult years ago, I understand how that existence can strip away your soul and your very humanity (all the while you're convinced you're right, happy, better than others, etc.) ❤
Honestly same, she constantly says marital r*ape isn't a real thing and that alone is a very sad glimpse of her life. But at the same time she spreads a dangerous message and hurts other people.
@@BourbonRose_ abused people can become perpetrators. Especially in fundamentalist circles; this kind of systematic abuse is very much cyclical in nature.
There are extremists in any group, and I love that you don’t judge people based on those extremists. I know plenty of Christians who are lovely people, and some who aren’t healthy to be around. We shouldn’t hate people just because they’re Christian or insult the religion because of a percentage of bad people who consider themselves a part of it. Thing I’m proud of: I downloaded a fitness app to help guarantee I’d get out of bed for nonessential reasons at least once a day and went for a short walk two days in a row.
Their are very real and valid reasons to criticize Christianity as a religion. However yes there are lovely people who practice it. Although I have to say those that are good people and practicing Christians are not following the Bible directly as written as it is a terrible misogynistic book that supports slavery and is extremely violent. The God described in that is a textbook abuser.
@@rishaa682 Do you believe Progressive Christianity is toxic? Progressive Christians generally don’t view the Bible as inerrant or infallible. “Progressive Christians have a deep belief in the centrality of the instruction to "love one another" (John 15:17) within the teachings of Jesus Christ.This leads to a focus on promoting values such as compassion, justice, mercy, and tolerance, often through political activism.” en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Progressive_Christianity
![เปิด อาณาจักร หมื่นล้าน "สาระตั้ม" l [Nickynachat]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/3XE0nPF4YkQ/mqdefault.jpg)
if gender roles are so natural, why do they change every couple hundred years? if gender roles are innate, why do people have to be forced into them?
And why are they different in different cultures
The thing is, people like the Transformed Wife will usually reply and say, “Yes gender roles are innate, but it’s because of feminist media that brainwashes you” or some shit.
@Layla Caballero
those are colours not gender roles
@suno lili
when you turn 35 let me know how strong and empowered you are when you’re lonely with your cats
@Layla Caballero my back rolls are construct as well
She looks and talks like the witch who was my son's Special Ed teacher in kindergarten and 1st grade. We butted heads a LOT over her terrible treatment of those children.
This was 1999, my son was seven years old and LOVED Star Wars movies. The new one, "Phantom Menace" had just come out, the one where Anakin Skywalker is a little boy with supernatural powers. This teacher called a meeting with me for the purpose of telling me NOT to let my son see this movie because "It is too empowering for children".
Since when is empowering children a bad thing?
My son's beloved grandfather had been murdered 3 years before this, and he could sure use some "empowerment" as far as I was concerned.
Our meeting was at the end of the school day, so I loved seeing that smug look on her face disappear as I hugged my little boy and said, "We are going to go see that new "Star Wars" movie, right now!"
We did, and went out for pizza right after that. He talked about what a great day that was for years.
As a witch irl, I don’t claim that witch
The hell was that doofus' problem with empowering children?
@AeriaGl0ris
Empowered children are probably more work
Empowered children are more likely to challenge the cruelty of the power structure that people like her want to perpetuate.
@@AeriaGl0ris if they are empowered they can't lord over them as much
Yeah I'm not talking advice about what is or isnt harmful or abusive from the woman who thinks marital r*pe isnt a thing.
Lol no kidding not to mention one who thinks beating children, even ones who can't understand language yet, is good. Physically beating children with objects. Barely born, nursing Infants to preteens get physical punishment.
I cannot stand that woman!! I prefer to call her The Trashformed Wife. LOL!!!
Solid decision.
She would feel differently if her husband r*ped her and then other people told her she had no right to complain.
@@mattmammone2338 unfortunately, that's doubtful. Christian fundamentalism has very strongly adopted the "joyfully (sexually) available" rhetoric, so many people within the culture don't have the awareness or beliefs to frame nonconsensual sex as harmful.
Something I am proud of: I submitted a lab report that was due this week and I wasn't even burnt out afterwards! It was something I was supposed to be working on for 4 weeks, and I procrastinated, but I was able to submit it on time and go about the rest of my week. Have a great day Mickey, thanks for the Saturday content
Kudos!
Fantastic!!!!
Well done, friend.
Congrats!! Ur doing great :)
You go girl! I'm so proud of you!!
You and Fundie Friday should really collab. Jen if you’re reading this, this is your sign.
Please! I need this!!!
I was just about to comment that I have FOMO from not being apart of this video Mickey :p
We need this in our lives
This!
Could the internet handle that much awesome?
I am so glad to see you covering this. I was raised in a extremely simular environment, taught a lot of the same things and escaped in my 20's. I have been working with counseling for YEARS to undo the damage and break the cycle.
You are very right about the fringes being very anti-science, anti-evidence and basing thier entire existence off of one source. Christianity, Science, and common sense do not have to be, and should not be, mutually exclusive.
Hi fellow escapee! I don’t know you but knowing someone else made it out of this stuff always makes me so happy. Yay for counseling and not letting them destroy us despite how hard they tried!
@@throwbackpoet8598 Hello fellow escapee!! Yes, Yay for getting out despite how hard they tried!!
I got out too! It's so nice to see people celebrating escaping this way of thinking. I feel like I'm crazy when I try to describe what it was like to someone who didn't live it.
@@bretthansen3739 Glad you got out too! I totally feel you on that. I have to be very specific in my wording of what it was like and bring up certain incidents to get my point across. I hope you are healing well 🙏
Well said!
Something we're proud of? Well I managed to read a book for an hour straight. My concentration recently has been really bad and at times I can't even read for 10 minutes without getting distracted. So yeah I felt proud for doing that hour
I think thats fantastic. I'm glad u did that.
Good for you! My focus has been super bad too, and I’m impressed.
That’s super exciting! Reading is way harder as an adult I feel so an uninterrupted hour is impressive! 👏🏼
@@MickeyAtkins thank you 😊 I used to read for hours as a kid but somehow lost that ability in adulthood 😅
@@bridmcgrath3606 thanks 😊
Adult child of certified wing nuts here! I can't tell you how grateful I am for channels like yours, especially working through childhood trauma as the mama of a young trans child, that is thriving and knows she is loved unconditionally 💕🌈
Thank you for the last part about invading privacy of children! My upbringing was extremely traumatic and there were no such thing as boundaries (I had no door to my room, there was screen sharing software on my computer that allowed remote access to it at any time, all of my conversations on the landline were monitored, my room was rummaged through when I was at school, etc). It never taught me to be “good” - I just learned to be terrified of being caught and better at being sneaky. Now, I’m a parent of a 9 year old boy. I knock and wait before entering his room, make sure he knows his space is his own, and don’t go snooping through his things outside of making sure he’s not video calling memaw without asking her first. We have a good relationship built on mutual trust. I can’t imagine inflicting the kind of invasive parenting I endured because “it’s how I was raised” or something.
I started a new job a couple weeks ago and finished training this week. I feel prepared for success and I’m excited!
I completely relate to this!! It’s really tough to deal with that trauma, and to create a safe space for yourself after having absolutely zero privacy.
Congrats on the job!! ❤️
people wouldn't to things like this to a random human stranger but think it's ok to do on their own children who depend on them
wow i thought my parents were bad lol
Loving this healing for you and your kiddo ❤️, your doing awesome 🤟🏾!!
Now that you mention such things, I recall back in the 1990's, evangelical fundamentalism's salad days, when home schooling became popular, that the folks my friend worked for often brought their kids to work - they were not allowed to shut the bathroom door. One such adult who came to install an appliance in my house, also did not shut the bathroom door - In my house.
"The stricter the parent the sneaker the kid" every single person I grew up with
Agreed but that depends
It's the same in my experience.
14:21 I can actually share my experience with this. My mom has gone through my phone multiple times before (not anymore). We have had arguments and I almost got thrown out. Because she kept going though my phone I have a paranoia problem. I feel like I can't leave my phone in the same room with her. I do not like being alone with her in a room or a car ride. I constantly feel like I am being watched and I double or triple check my surroundings. I wake up in the middle of the night panicking over if I logged out of my social medias and Google account. I do not feel safe in my own home...please listen to her when she is talking about this it actually effects your child and their perceptions of you
I'm sorry this is happening to you.
Are you still in the home with your mother? This sounds like an unhealthy situation for you. Can you speak to another family member or a trusted teacher about this situation? Perhaps they can help you if you are still a minor. Don't hesitate to reach out just because this is the way it's always been. It's not right and something needs to change.
I really hope you can make a change quickly the only reason I say that is my stepmother has cameras and microphones all over the house she listens to our conversations I could go on and on but take care of your mental health please
My daughter is 16. I absolutely will not go through her room or her phone. I've had other parents tell me I am naive, but I want her to have her privacy and her safe place.
You’re being a good mother by giving your child that privacy, and teaching them it’s important to have boundaries. My mother would always be looking through my phone, and other private things like journals. I thought that was normal because my friends parents did similar things.
I like how she blocks replies on her Twitter posts. She just likes to preach - she has no interest in anyone's thoughts except her own. I guess it's safe being ignorant.
Transformed wife: children's life should be filled with happiness and laughter
Also her: Has talked extensively about how you should beat your children and even tells parents to be extremely controlling in the next sentence
I was beaten many times by my mum, though I did do lots of stupid and dangerous things in the past…
Lori Alexander has admitted to spanking her child for FOUR HOURS until the kid put its toy away and insists she wasn't abusive 😮
She admits to having beaten one of her kids for FOUR HOURS for not putting away a toy. Four hours.
Something I’m proud of: my mom was trying to guilt me into talking to my sister and I stood up for myself and said why would I reach out to a person who is constantly trying to make me feel bad about myself? Also, if she really wanted to talk to me than she could reach out. It is really hard, but thanks to your videos I have gotten better at maintaining boundaries. Thank you! (Context: I moved out of state and it got really really ugly before I left because my sister was wanting to control me and not wanting me to move in a very toxic way🙃)
Good job!
This is amazing! I'm sure you worked hard to get to this point, you should be proud of yourself! :) /gen
I hope you feel better after standing up for yourself it is a good feeling very very proud and it's really like a mini party
upholding boundaries with family members can be So difficult
way to go 😎
Something I'm proud of:
I just finished a Christmas gift for my sister!! I made a Winter capelet for her (hood and 4 pockets included!!) that's reversible. One side is a burgundy flannel and the other is a purple cotton print with tiny moons and stars, there is a sherpa layer in the middle to make it super warm :) The white sherpa acts as a trim along the hood and down the front, it ends around her elbows.
Now I'm working on little pillows for a friend, shaped like a ghost, a bat, and then a basic square pillow all with really cute halloween-y cotton fabrics.
I'm planning so many sewing projects for Xmas I only hope I can get them all done haha
That sounds like a wonderful gift - so cozy, thoughtfully designed, and fun to wear! I am sure your sister will love it!
Wow, I imagine that is so beautiful! It sounds like you put in a lot of talented work. Four pockets!! ❤❤❤ Love that, great job 😊
That sounds awesome and makes me want to learn how to sew.
That sounds super comfy and nice! I have a lot of sewing projects planned too, and so far the most I've done was organize it into piles and iron some of it...and that took HOURS.
Amazing!!
The Transformed wife is frustrating to learn about. So for my comment, I'm really proud of being an ex smoker for a higher percentage of 2021 than I was a smoker!
Hell yeah! Keep it up!
YAY!!! That is not an easy task. good for you!!!! before you know it, you'll wonder how you ever smoked in the first place.
On this front, I'm proud that I haven't had a tobacco product in 2 weeks. Unfortunately, I have yet to kick the nicotine addiction and oral fixation aspects of my smoking.
@@midnightnyx261 that's still progress, keep it up!
congrats! thats really awesome
Excited to see your mental health take on the transformed wife, didn't know I needed that
have you seen the stuff about her not believing marital r*pe exists, and i believe someone asked her for advice about a situation that sounded like just that, and she was like "would you want your husband to go to prison?" or something?? 😞so disturbing and harmful
"I don't teach marital rape. I just preach to abused wives that they're the problem and manipulate them into retracting allegations against their abusive partners! They're totally different things!"
Watching these videos constantly reaffirms for me that I made the right decision to leave the strict christianity I was raised in. This brings up so many memories of lessons I was taught. My mother was always submissive to my father in decisions. They might discuss something for a little bit, but once he made a decision I would see her bite her tongue and shut up on the subject, even if she knew more about it, even if she wasn't done telling him info about the situation, even if she believed deep down that it was the wrong choice.
When I was working on our wedding vows with my husband, my mom pointedly reminded me that at her wedding she had vowed to obey her husband as the head of the family. She wanted me to do the same, even though I had made my feelings on that clear years ago.
My husband suggested we instead include the following, and I'm so happy we did (I forget exactly how it was worded but anyway) We vowed to respect each other as equals in our relationship and to always consider each other and come together in making decisions. I had joy in my heart to read it in front of my family and to break free from that generational curse.
With walking intervals, because that's how I like to do it, I did a total of 48 minutes of running this morning! I am a proud fat athlete or fathlete and I love your fat positivity, Mickey! Once I learned that I didn't need to worry about diet culture bullshit, movement for its own sake got a lot more fun and it makes me happy!
proud of you! Also, i aboslitely love the word "fathlete" it'll probably be my favorite fdor a while now
Fathletes unite!!
I'm proud of myself because I went to my work's holiday party even when my usual social anxiety started to kick in...and I ended up having a lot of fun and winning a gift card to Target and an annual pass to all the National Parks and such. ^.^ It feels like I was rewarded for sticking to my plans and it feels really good.
When I was a young teenager I was told I was to sensitive. I literally remember turning my sadness into anger. Why is it more okay to be angry all the time then sensitive. I've since been in therapy dealing with this but my first instinct when any kind of upset is to get angry.
I'm glad you kept in the one about privacy. I was in many ways extremely sheltered and invaded by my fundamentalist mother. It harmed me. I'm very thankful I have the space and a supportive husband and therapist to work on recovering and healing.
Ever wonder why fundamentalists seem to have such weak beliefs that they fear their children abandoning their authoritarian branch of Christianity if they ever learn that other beliefs exist outside their own caricature of what they look like?
This week, I was home alone while my parents were looking at houses in the Houston area. I managed to get almost everything I wanted to get done actually finished, and I barely needed reminders for myself for once! It was really nice to feel that sense of accomplishment.
This week I'm proud that I politely communicated my boundaries around Christmas spending/gifts with my in-laws!
Serious congrats, I struggle sooooooo badly with the polite-part. Can't say for you, but for me, that's something to throw a party over. Really, you have every reason to be proud of yourself.
Love that for you
Something I did this week that I'm proud of/happy with..
I went to an actual therapist for the first time ever. I'm finally taking steps to deal with my childhood trauma and abuse.
I'm glad you're able to access the help you've been seeking. Wishing you the absolute best with therapy and hope it helps you to recover and heal 🙏🏽🙏🏽
Something I'm Proud Of: I was feeling sick, so, I stayed in bed and watched Golden Girls on my iPad.
It's very difficult for me to let myself slow down and not think I'm lazy for wanting to relax.
It was very nice. 😊🌷🌼
Something to be proud of: I was writing a story for the last 11 months and finally found the corage to get it online. I'm not so certain that the story is good enough, but I like it nonetheless, so I gave it a go. It was really good because I was given 3 amazing reviews that made me smile a lot.
That's awesome! It takes so much courage to put yourself out there like that, you totally deserve to feel pride in what you accomplished! Congratulations on your positive reviews!
Pretending we can control everything our kids see and do is absolutely foolish.
Lori Alexander is not qualified to talk about soup, let alone mental health. Also I guarantee she did not read that psychology article she only read the headline which probably took her 4 1/2 hours to sound out.
Lori's not even HUMAN. She's evil and disgusting. My god does she loathe herself THAT much??
Thank you for this!!
Something I did that I'm proud of: Yesterday I set a boundary with a friend who continually takes advantage of my kindness and basically makes me into her therapist. I refused to compromise my mental health and had a relaxing evening with my bf instead. Yay!
What I’m proud of: I finally finished year 11!! this year was rough, in the past 2 months the boy i was seeing left me, my grandpa died and my parents separated. On top of this school was shit and the punches kept coming. But I finished! I’m proud of myself for sticking it out.
Hang in there, young friend. You've been put through the wringer for sure! I'm glad you didn't give up. Congratulations on making it through.⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
@@susanzoeckler4926 thank you so much kind stranger 🤍
I'm so sorry that you've had to endure that much turmoil :( but I'm proud of you, too, for finishing the school year, despite everything! Wishing you brighter days ahead, hun! 🙏🏽❤️✨
I just found your channel and I love it!
In response to children in particular: after growing up a controlling home with a parent who was just ... ugh. All it did was MAKE ME A BETTER LIAR. I made double sure that I did not continue that environment with my son. He's 16, amazing, and we have a wonderful relationship. I wish he'd clean up after himself better and be more proactive with his homework but he's a testimant to what can happen if you treat kids like you would like to be treated.
I'm convinced that the Transformed Wife is miserable and instead of just admitting it, she's trying to convince everyone else to be miserable with her. No thank you.
I appreciate this video so much, for reasons that feel too heavy to get into here. (I survived a fundamentalist upbringing and currently live at home again--briefly, I hope.) BUT! A thing I'm proud of is that I created a lucet fork, purely on a whim, out of silver and gold jewelry wire, and learned how to make I cord for my crochet projects. I'm amazed it worked!
Thank you for these videos. I grew up in an excessively Baptist household and my mom is still upset with me that I’m not a stay at home mom. I’m 46.
I’m proud of myself because I just sent 3 boxes of scarves that I crocheted to a friend in Virginia and she will give them to homeless kids for Christmas 💜💜💜
"Excessively Baptist" made me laugh out loud. I can relate!
My fundamentally Christian friends tried to pray my anxiety and depression away and laid hands on my and prayed in gibberish to get “my demons” away. It obviously didn’t work and I felt even more depressed because I thought I had demons in me and I wasn’t strong enough to get them out. They also told me I shouldn’t take meds and instead keep praying and do a deliverance aka exorcism… like wtf. And is as that desperate that I went with it..
I finally got a lyme diagnosis which seams like not a good thing but it's answers which we've been trying to get for years.
Also, I am recording my own podcast about living with disorders and disabilities which I'm very excited about. Collectively, those of us with disorders and disabilities make a larger percentage of the population than those who are "normal" and healthy. But as a disabled and disordered person, I've found that it's not socially acceptable to talk about it -- even though struggling with this stuff is the norm. So we are going to talk about it.
I also think a collaboration with Jen and James from Fundy Fridays would be AMAZING.
Getting a diagnosis is so important and can be really validating!
That’s wonderful! I definitely think the podcast I; particular is nice. As someone with several disabilities and disorders, it definitely feels sort of “forbidden” to talk about until it’s actively brought up, and it’s good to hear you’re putting information out there!
As a disabled person, that's so cool! I feel like mental illness in particular is often swept under the rug with disabled people because we are already expected to have such a low quality of life., Super sad, and it needs to change.
Thank you for the encouragement! You made my day. ❤💗❤ (I rarely get replies to my YT comments 😍.) I cannot wait to share my podcast with the world. Currently working on my first episode. 💪
Can I ask you the name of the podcast? I think I would like to listen to it
Personally, this week I finally went to the doctor to address what’s going on that’s making me fatigued constantly. I’ve been this way for a couple years and I physically need to sleep 14 hours a day. On my way to finding a cause I hope. ❤️
Good for you! Asking for help from medical professionals and going through the process is daunting but necessary. Keep advocating for yourself. Hopefully you have a support person that can go on this journey with you too.
Ooh I know that feeling! High five for advocating for yourself! I hope it gets you some answers and some relief 💕
I hope you find answers! I felt a similar way quite a while back and was diagnosed with chronic fatigue syndrome. Once you know the cause you can start tackling it!
Thank you all for the kind wishes!! 🥰
@@nyanbinary1717 that's great I'm glad you're taking control we all need help now and then when I retired from my job I could not get out of bed for a month that is how much stress I was under take your time do the things you want to do I'm just roll with things you feel like playing with makeup one day then do it give your body and mind sometime to heal super happy for you
Something I'm proud: I cooked delicious tuna pasta and ate 3 full meals today. I'm in university and I slack off cooking proper food.
Also when you read the tweet about "shaming women" I said what seconds before you did😂equally as shocked.
I’m proud of the fact I had my first therapy appointment this week. I have been dealing with severe depression brought on by unresolved childhood trauma. It gets really bad in the winter and earlier this week I hit a low. I ended up crying most of the night and then got myself up in the morning, researched therapists in my area and made the appointment. My new therapist was able to get me in 2 days later and it was AMAZING. I felt so much lighter afterwards and I’m excited to see the progress we make with my healing.
The post about protecting children from the sins of society made me think of Kellogg (cornflakes) telling the public that parents should bust into their children’s rooms and touch their genitals to catch them masturbating, because “self pollution is a crime doubly abominable”. When you insist on banning all contact with the ‘sinful’ parts of society from your children’s lives and using shame for participation in them, you are conditioning the child to attach shame to those actions, making them feel dirty.
Like in the Josh Duggar scandals, instead of his parents realizing porn is a normal part of a teenage boy’s mind and teaching him that porn is not realistic and what a healthy sexual relationship should be, they banned porn all together. And that led to him abusing his sisters and later, becoming a pedophile. LET ME MAKE THIS CLEAR: creating shame around porn/sex and banning it from your household will not make your child a molestor/pedophile! BUT when a boy who knows nothing of what realistic, normal sex outside of marriage in our society looks like and then is barraged with “watch me f*ck my step sister” titles on porn pages, which are the most common types that pop up first on any porn page, obviously he believed this is just what people do.
Instead of believing they can prevent the child from ever coming in contact with these sinful aspects of society, parents should open up conversations to talk about and educate their child on topics like this.
Kristen from GD 2021 conference and podcast spoke on how anxiety is about and because “your a sinner” “who is not obeying the Lordddd”. Ugh!
I just can’t. No wonder I was a wreck during the years I was involved in Christianity.
Oh did she now? 🙃
@@MickeyAtkins She did and I’m working hard on the triggers and sometimes listen to them to gain a greater understanding of where my head and heart were for way, way to long. Sigh.
I’ve had anxiety since I was a little girl and I’m telling ya I nearly lost my mind in religion.
Self forgiveness is real work as I’m sure you know. Of course learning and implementing my priceless tools ⚒️ 🧰 is also key to getting on the other side of fundamental Christianity.
@@brendasmith7345 - same. I don't remember a time in my life when I wasn't anxious. This developed into depression as well as I got older. The clear message I got through all of this was that it was my fault for not trusting gawd enough.
Apparently it had nothing to do with me having undiagnosed ADHD (diagnosed at 31) and living with my abusive, alcoholic father, and my mother who enables him.
Interestingly, I was diagnosed at 31 and also commenced therapy at that time. I was done with church and religion by 38.
@@Luubelaar 💚💗✨💗✨.
I too had parents that were alcoholic. Grandparents even worse crap going on so totally makes sense I was anxious. Nothing at ALL to do with what a horrible sinner I am.
I’m so happy we both escaped from the toxic and dangerous situations including the crazy religion.
@@MickeyAtkins p..s. If your interested in taking a listen👂
to their podcast it’s episode #43 ..The Girl Defined Show. 3 Truths for fighting fear, anxiety and worry. It’s horrible.
Something I was proud of: I'm in a very anxious phase rn, everythings a bit loopsided, so I flip my sh*t all the time over the most minor things and can't stop crying. But this week I managed to get my to-do-list done anyway, and without pushing myself, but simply by letting my emotions run their course, give myself enough space to figure out the actual issue, and approaching a solution on how to handle it, and all in time enough to be where I had to be, while barely running late, ever. It's hilarious, but I'm super proud of myself.
It's funny that she says that "God's ways" are perfect and infallible, and yet they are always reinterpreting what the Bible says. Let alone the fact that "God's word" has been translated and even drastically altered over the years. :/
This!!
Something I‘m proud of:
I felt really down today, had no energy and felt tired (usually signs for me that a depressiv phase is coming) so I cooked a nice meal for myself and finally decorated my flat for Christmas to keep myself busy. And it helped a lot! I’m not tired anymore and I’m motivated to actually do something again. I‘m proud of myself for not „giving in“ to feeling down today.
Something I'm proud of today: I actually had the energy, after being depressed for a couple weeks from my kitten running away, to make three batches of cookie dough. One batch is gingerbread and two are sugar cookie. One of the batches of sugar cookie is being split in half to go to two different places: the fire department right down our street and our AutoZone we go to (my dad's a mechanic and they're always helping him with discounts and such). I still miss my kitten terribly, and it's extremely difficult to just continue on, but baking does help sometimes. I hope you're doing well and have some special times during this holiday season!
Something I'm proud of:
I started testosterone Friday! It has already boosted my confidence and mood so much!
So happy for you ❤️🤟🏾!!
I don't have something I'm proud of but I do have something that made me happy. My kitten's stroller training is going so well that we went on several walks this week. She now jumps into the stroller when I get home from work so we can go on walkies.
Referring back to the video, whenever I have conversations with individuals about separation of church and state, The Transformed Wife is one of my go to's
to demonstrate who exactly I'm talking about. Most don't know about her but when they learn who she is and the message she's spreading, they always give her content a big yikes.
With 3 more assignments to finish today and tomorrow I will be finished with my first quarter of graduate school for my LMFT masters! Thank you Mickey your videos were part of what inspired me to take the leap and go back to school 🏫
Definitely want to see you take on her youtube videos!!! In the meantime, I'm really proud of finishing a cardboard cat couch for my new kitten, especially since she loves it so much she spent the first day after it was done refusing to come out of it. :)
My proud moment this week: I submitted my application for a sabbatical (I’m a college professor) to work on a project I’m really excited about.
Here's a mental health win for this week: this week I was proud of myself for being able to openly verbalize my intimacy needs with my spouse. We've come a long way in our therapy journey 🥰
I'm proud of myself this week for actually getting some writing done. This past year or two I've barely written anything and I'm starting to get back in the habit.
13:59 she didn't read the article, she probably just saw the tile and was like, "they are hating on men!" And made assumptions and shared it instead of actually reading it because if she had, she might have realized that the article is caring toward men.
Yeah she didn't read Jinger or Jill Duggar's books either but claimed they both "threw their parents under the bus". I called her out on it and she just deleted my comments, lol, she's not a real deep thinker
to be honest, I think I have a right to talk about parenthood as a former child lol. it sounds bizarre to me when I say "you shouldn't do that my parents did that and it fvcked me up" and they say "ARE YOU A PARENT?????" no but I know what not to do because I WAS A KID AT ONE POINT
Found you through Fundie Friday’s!
I know you’re not a replacement to my regular therapy but you have made me learn a lot of things about myself already! Thank you 😊
* open my eyes about stuff about myself
Ah, yes. The Trashformed Wife! Where everything she says is nothing but trash. 🗑💩☠️
Something I did this past week that made me feel really good about myself- I made absolutely delicious, homemade buttermilk pancakes, all from scratch! They were sooo good!
And, last night, I made my first pumpkin pie, too. (The filling was all from scratch, but not the pie crust- I used Pillsbury pie dough out of convenience, lol. Mastering homemade pie crust will come soon though. 😊)
I’ll also be making a homemade coconut pecan pie in the next couple days here, so I’m pretty excited about that, as well. 💜
I love baking and cooking, so when I make delicious food, I always feel really good about myself! I definitely love eating delicious food, but I also really love sharing great food with my loved ones, too. 💖
I feel so sorry for her children I mean my Dad could be a real prick sometimes but he never took away our privacy or freedoms and always trusted us enough to make our own decisions and as a result me and my brothers have an open and healthy relationship with him. I swear some people just think their kids are too stupid to function.
Something I'm proud of: my vege garden is going off! The grocery bill can suck it!
Or using religion as the overall dictator to raising them
The section about giving kids privacy is so so important to me. As far back as i can remember my parents were big on giving me choices and knocking before entering my room and stuff like that. I didn't realize how important that was and how many bullets i dodged until i started to see how my friends parents acted. Like your kids human and deserving of human rights.
Something I'm proud of? I'm reading a science fiction that is waaay heavy on the science. I don't understand half of what is going on but I haven't given up on it yet, so yay.
I mean yes, childhood should be a safe and happy time filled with consistent love and the ability to trust their adults. But part of that love and trust is also trusting them enough to allow them to have time alone with their own mind and their own thoughts and feelings. And it also involves respecting them enough to expose them in an age appropriate way to the things they will need to know to be functional and safe in the world they’re aging into. We’re parenting children because we’re raising adults.
When I was young, my family had very fundamentalist beliefs. They don’t remember a lot of the screwed up things said anymore, but I sure do. It always felt wrong to me.
In my parents defense it was to “protect me from the demonic secular world” which was absolutely bullshit
A lady I knew many years ago told me that a year before, her daughter liked Justin Beiber and had stopped listening now but if she (the daughter) still did then she (the mother) would ban it. Not discussing if he is good or not, just sayin when I was 15, if my mother told me I couldn't listen to something, I would every second I was out of the house SIMPLY TO BE A BRAT.
Which also brings up the point, if you give abstinence-only sex-ed, I was far from the only teen with the attitude "I'm gunna do that thing PURELY BECAUSE you told me not to."
"children's life should be filled with innocence and laughter" then beats her toddler multiple times over hours in a day.
Are you referring to spankings?
@@DrDoerk while I'm firm on spankings being abuse, I think hitting a 2 year old with a strap especially not just on the bum, for hours (her original video said for hours, changed after backlash), crosses a line past spanking
Also, I just read a messaged conversation. She also uses a rod when they learn to crawl
@Dr. Doerk call it what you want, but corporal punishment is still demonstrated to be abusive and ineffective as a parenting tool. You don't get to have an opinion about things we have empirical evidence for.
Something I'm proud of: Recently, I was incredibly depressed/dysphoric. My friends reached out to me and instead of resorting to unhealthy coping mechanisms that I have it the past, I allowed them to help distract and comfort me. I know that might not be a big thing for others but for me I often push people away in those moments out of fear...fear that I'll be seen as weak...fear that I'll be a burden...but this time I didn't and I was better for it. I'm lucky to have such amazing friends and I'm proud of myself for letting them in.
I Havw been changing my view about the appropriate and beneficial way to raise my 3 kids over the last few months. I was raised in a home where I had no privacy, respect or boundaries and it didn’t matter how I felt about it. As a parent now, I can’t imagine treating my kids like their boundaries and privacy don’t matter.
I moved from Budapest to Vienna this Tuesday and started at my new job. It was stressful but I managed to do it without a major breakdown and was able remind myself to only focus on the step ahead of me, so it significantly lowered my anxiety, and I'm proud that I could handle it way better than I used to handle major events like this in the past. It means I'm growing, right?
Something I’m proud of: I submitted a short story for a yearly anthology this week. I’ve been working towards it and honing my skills since I was a kid (I’m 24 now, turning 25 in 2 months). It has just always been scary due to social anxiety, low self esteem and other things. I’ve been dreaming about doing it for so long, and I finally did it. The publishers will give me feed back and a response (yay or nay) somewhere around the beginning of March. Just doing it felt like a victory of sorts, and I don’t feel like the result will be the most important thing right now. I’m just happy about “taking the leap”. It makes me feel like I can actually accomplish things, because trying feels a little less scary.
Got so excited to see your name pop up on my phone!
Thank you for all your work and giving me (and probably others here, lol) somewhere to take a break and laugh. Love it here. 💕💕
This makes me so happy! Thank you for being here! 🥰
@@MickeyAtkins 💕💜💙😊🥰
A relationship with my mother was built on this toxicity. My marriage is ending because of a similarly perpetuated narrative that has left me feeling guilty about buying a new pair of shoes or asserting my independence. This video resonated with me in so many ways. Thank you.
It makes me so mad that it is so important to these people how someone acts on the surface and no one cares about the cost to that person. And later when they cannot cope anymore it is their fault for not being "godly enough". My best friend scared me into fundamental Christianity when I was like 12 and it has taken me more than 10 years to get over that. This stuff is so dangerous and it makes me soo mad.
Pastor kid here. Growing up, I heard so many times from my Dad how the Fundies were giving us all a bad name and just need to stop talking. This is even more true today. UGH.
Something I’m proud of? I built a handcrank bike this week all on my own. I have a three wheeled scooter (because CP) and now I also have a three wheeled bike! I bought it for exercise reasons, and it will give me some chest strength and exercise time. I felt very handy! (And the spaghetti bolognese and tiramisu afterward didn’t hurt either ;)
Just read something about Dutch children being the happiest of all surveyed in the world, and apparently Dutch parents tend to not shame their children, are open-minded, etc. Follow the evidence...
I saw you taking on the Transformed Wife and thought I couldn't love you more. Then I spotted the plumbob piece of artwork on your wall. Dag dag! I am watching this video while organizing my mods for Sims 2!
I’m proud of myself for getting through this week and turning in a big paper that I’ve been worrying about for weeks. Now, on to the next ones…the end of the semester can’t come soon enough 😫 but I didn’t think that I would accomplish getting this turned in, and I did it. :)
I am finally able to practice full sets of nail extensions on my own hands and wear them! (Something I am proud of) In between making nail polish and acrylic swatches, I have been learning and practicing nail/cuticle prep and acrylic application for nail extensions. I am in the early stages of learning to become a nail technician🖤💀🖤
She sounds exactly like my mom, I had to finally cut my mom off because of the harmful rhetoric she preaches.
I'm always feeling like I'm not meeting the bar at work and was going to leave my department. 2 days ago the person who is launching the second office of our dept across the country, said they really wanted me to start it with them and they didn't ask me earlier because I sounded excited for the change in depts. I am having major imposter syndrome 🙃
I love your patient's art gallery behind you, and would love to know the stories behind them. My son (29 with schizophrenia) and I have started going to an art therapy group once a week and it's been very fulfilling and a great outlet for things we don't have words for. I have had depression since childhood, 4 years ago I had a 5150 because my therapist over-reacted and thought I was going to kill myself, partly because he heard me singing the old blues song "Trouble In Mind" (the Nina Simone version)
"I'm gonna lay my head
On some lonesome railroad line
Let the 2: 19 train
Ease my troubled mind
Trouble in mind, I'm blue
But I won't be blue always
'Cause the sun's gonna shine
In my back door some day..."
I wasn't really going to do it, but singing sad songs actually makes me feel better at times!
Doesn't sing and listen to sad music when you're feeling off and sad yourself make everyone feel better? It's like a good cry, you lean into the emotion, let it run through you, and come out relieved and breathing freer on the other side. And like getting a hug from someone who is compassionate, music and sad songs feel like someone else in the world is sharing your emotions, so you're not alone, and it's okay to feel that way for now, and the shame vanishes into thin air. Isn't that the while purpose off these sorta songs? Seriously, I'm neurodivergent, did I miss something?
For me listening to sad music is an action I can take when I’m sad to help so I get you 💜
When I was 14 years old, I confided to a therapist that I was having suicidal thoughts. As a result, I ended up being institionalized. That in and of itself was a very traumatic experience, but during my stay I ended up being sexually abused. As a result, I have never been able to fully trust, or open up to a therapist again. And if I were to ever find myself in a dark place like that again, I would not feel safe reaching out for help, for fear of being locked up again. I just wonder how many people out there who are suffering from depression, don't seek help for fear of being hospitalized against their will.
Your commentaries on these topics are immensely helpful for re-wiring the parts of my brain that grew up hearing things like this spoken as normal.
But Mickey, Lori just wants to save us all from enjoying ourselfs to much. God might get jealous and send us to hell if we smile to much.
Jokes aside, thank you for covering this type of content. There are plenty of ex-cult/fundie/religious creators covering and debunking this kind of BS, but it's really great to hear an actual professional take on this.
Love your comment idea this week!
Big fan. Love your videos. Your message is always so wonderful and you are so informative.
Today was the completion of week four of six for my dog training certification. I'm so excited to start this job because it's literally everything I ever wanted and training has been so much fun. This was also the first day I didn't feel imposter syndrome walking out of the "office"
I hope you are enjoying the cooler weather in the sunshine state!
The fact that I'm here shows how effective you are. Every vid I watch of yours I cry and have flashbacks, and yet I keep coming back bc you when you laugh at how "cucu bananas" something is, I feel validated. Plus you are informative and adorable❤
Let's just say, my parents follow all the televangelists and think the Westboro Church have a lot of good things to say...
I am proud of myself today for how I communicated with my partner. He is really stressed and took out his stress in an anger outburst towards me. I was able to tell him I was hurt and that I needed a minute, and then when we were both calm I told him what it was that hurt me and we talked about how he can be better and how I can be better. It felt so good to have a healthy communication about it and set boundaries
I’m so happy for you 😁
I have been binge watching all your videos.
I am currently dealing with soon much childhood trauma, and it's making me realize how bad it is.
I have always felt misunderstood because I was "too sensitive" but your videos help me feel understood and heard
Aaa this is weird, but I’m very proud of establishing a boundary in a conversation. I told them “hey let’s stop, we’re both winding each other up” and it worked! It feels so refreshing and I’m really proud of only moving my self on!
The only thing that comes from enforcing this strict surveillance on kids is making them better at hiding what they're doing, and more afraid to come to you if something DOES go wrong. Not to go into a lot of detail but, when I was being assaulted by multiple different men online at the age of 14, I didn't feel safe enough to go to my parents and talk about what was wrong. And in turn that was used as a threat for why I couldn't stop it on my own.
On a lighter note, I'm proud of myself for organizing for my wife to come down and visit me this Christmas. My wife is a resident of Denmark and I'm a resident of the USA, so it's always really nice to be able to get to spend time with them in person.
Something I’m proud of: setting boundaries at work and sticking to them! 👏🏼 sometimes tricky to do in a new position as a recently graduated healthcare provider… but so worth it!
Something I’m proud of; I went through a shitty breakup and I was shattered. I’m proud that I’ve been coping in a good way. I have thought about engaging in risky behaviour but I’ve curbed those thoughts with other things I enjoy doing
I am going to finally get a therapist sooner rather than later. At least we have planned for that. I finally, after six years of knowing I need a therapist, got the balls not to simply just mention needing a therapist and actually push for getting a therapist. Which was a bit of an argument. Since I've had this talk about getting a therapist with my mom (who is only doing this so I have "no more excuses" as to why I can't keep up with life [i.e. failing almost all of my college classes this semester bc of a complex multitude of reasons]), I've felt a lot better, more hopeful overall. I am doing my research for therapists in my area, that take the insurance I'm covered under. I've found three that may be helpful, and they all do online therapy. I have to send emails, and I'm super anxious and excited for all of this at the same time. I just wanted to share this here because I kinda need to. I'm still worried how this is going to work out, and I don't know what's gonna happen really.
Also I'm still working on my futuristic fantasy scifi dystopian (?) novel. Still in the process of doing research in the cultural backgrounds for my characters, but it fills very fulfilling for me to finally be working on an original story that I have been intermittently returning to add to ever so often. It's still very much in the beginning stages because I have so much I need to mentally and physically attend to, but when I get these bursts of creativity and energy, it's really good to me. I've been working on this for over a year now, and it's really what I want to do. So I'm proud of myself for pulling it back out to work on.
I know how difficult it is to go and admit needing a therapist. You should be really proud of yourself, and I'm so happy for you!
Thank you so much for this message. I was also fed into this community by these people when I was in a vulnerable spot in my life. I have come out of that phase but the amount of shit I've had to deal with is a consequence of the mindset that I had due these religious people. I was 16 and this ruined so much of my time. I hope nobody falls into their traps because it is an awful world to live in with their mindset. Again, thank you so much. I wish I had found this channel when I most needed it but I found it just in time. This channel helps so much when you dont have access to therapy. I have learnt so much from here. Thank you.
These people are like “facts don’t care about your feelings,” but yet they forget that “feeling” don’t care about their “facts.” Also being rude and bombastic does not equal correct.
In response to one of the earliest tweets (maybe first), you pointed out some of the negative effects of shame, including damaged self esteem. For people like Lori, this isn't a down side to weigh against the good. It's just more good. These groups want your self esteem low and your decision making compromised. They see those states as virtuous. (It might sound like I'm mocking them, I'm not. I was raised in a theologically similar church, and I'm still unpacking the damage 20 years later)
Sorry, bad short term memory so I can't "save up" my comments to the end. You talked about the lack if privacy being bad for healthy parent/child relationships. Healthy is not their goal. Their goal is to model the relationship you are supposed to have with God (or the state): They are better than you, and your job is to obey. I saw a piece of advice on this topic (I think from Focus on the Family) that explained that you shouldn't try to reason with your children because it can teach them to think before obeying.
I've heard this before, and it may not be scientifically proven, but I still think it's true: authoritarian parenting doesn't raise kids who follow the rules, it raises kids who become really good at breaking the rules.
I would love to see your reactions to the TH-cam content she puts out.
I feel really bad for Laurie Alexander.
She seems like an empty person. Like I look in her eyes (on a video for example) and she doesn't look happy, emotionally healthy, content, etc. Having come out of an IFB cult years ago, I understand how that existence can strip away your soul and your very humanity (all the while you're convinced you're right, happy, better than others, etc.) ❤
Honestly same, she constantly says marital r*ape isn't a real thing and that alone is a very sad glimpse of her life. But at the same time she spreads a dangerous message and hurts other people.
Her mentality comes across as “I was given this role, I will act out this role.”
@@BourbonRose_ abused people can become perpetrators. Especially in fundamentalist circles; this kind of systematic abuse is very much cyclical in nature.
Mickey, thank you so, so, so much for actually putting in links for further reading, it is of SO much help!
There are extremists in any group, and I love that you don’t judge people based on those extremists. I know plenty of Christians who are lovely people, and some who aren’t healthy to be around. We shouldn’t hate people just because they’re Christian or insult the religion because of a percentage of bad people who consider themselves a part of it.
Thing I’m proud of: I downloaded a fitness app to help guarantee I’d get out of bed for nonessential reasons at least once a day and went for a short walk two days in a row.
Their are very real and valid reasons to criticize Christianity as a religion. However yes there are lovely people who practice it. Although I have to say those that are good people and practicing Christians are not following the Bible directly as written as it is a terrible misogynistic book that supports slavery and is extremely violent. The God described in that is a textbook abuser.
If you dont think christian beliefs are inherently toxic try actually reading the bible
@@rishaa682 Do you believe Progressive Christianity is toxic? Progressive Christians generally don’t view the Bible as inerrant or infallible.
“Progressive Christians have a deep belief in the centrality of the instruction to "love one another" (John 15:17) within the teachings of Jesus Christ.This leads to a focus on promoting values such as compassion, justice, mercy, and tolerance, often through political activism.” en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Progressive_Christianity
@@catsmom129 progressive teachers are false teachers and don't follow the word
@@juliafraa6419 you should read the Bible more clearly.... it doesn't support slavery like you think it does.....just think about Moses