Absolutely priceless information, not even money can buy this type of knowledge. Thank you mama Fumi for sharing your wisdom with us. Here are some flowers you 💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐 💐 💐💐💐💐💐🫶🏾🙏🏾
Aunty Fumi said what? “And I Quote LEAVE HIM ALONE!!!!!” It’s hard pill to swallow at this point.however ,that is a powerhouse advice given !!❤️ Tell yourself to calm down and act as if you don’t care about him for so ever! And try to happy yourself to the fullest! Thank you sis❤️👍
any so-called man💁♂️ who has the unmitigated gall to ghost. is an immature lame child mentality loser whose beneath u thus, NEVER deserved u. 🥳celebrate his absence w/silence!!!
One word comes to mind when I listen to the sister to sister episodes: self-control. Which stems from self respect, which is a by product of self-love. Thank you for being a voice of substance, Fumi.
Agree..if women could just love themselves more and demand respect, then the rest flows automatically. You don‘t even care and realize you dodged a bullet, a miserable guy who does not deserve you. Move on…. The best way to heal is to meet another guy or several dating candidates
Also know that the love and heartache you feel now WILL FADE! It doesn’t feel like it at the time, but trust. I had my heart crushed to pieces by a man I thought was my forever - and then he ghosted. I did everything Fumi said not to do, lol! But then, years later when I was engaged to my now husband, I thought of that man, and for the life of me I couldn’t remember his last name! Back then, I thought it would become MY last name too, but now I couldn’t remember it. It was wonderful perspective. This too will pass. Better things ahead.
Remember this: -If a man really wants you, nothing will keep him away. If he doesn’t, nothing will make him stay. -No response is a response -Take mixed signals as a no
ABSOLUTELY!! My husband literally PURSUED me while I was in school. He was a preacher, but, he made the time to travel to my city just to visit me, and make me know he meant business.
Aunty is preaching today! I was just saying, "AMEN, SISTER!!" I ghosted on a guy who thought he'd ghosted on me. I was so into him, but my self-esteem just couldn't take the manipulation any more. And I left. Not a word, no goodbyes. He resurfaced in my final year of college, and by then, I'd met my current husband who'd taught me how to enjoy being chased by a man.
He ghosted me, had the audacity to come back months later talking about "I dreamt about you " I then open up about my feelings hoping this time we can move forward and build something (yes I know I was stupid ) .. I got a nonchalant response ... I just don't get why some men play these games sometimes... Safe to say I feel a bit deflated but I deleted his number and chat 😌
I never blame myself. If he’s gone, he’s gone! I assume something is going on with him, and I thank the LORD he didn’t drag me in it! I’m not calling him PERIOD! If he’s dead, it will be in the paper. BYE!
I had a friend and by nature I call to check and realized, they never called unless I called. I stopped all the calls and texts and was like whatever. They now call and are trying to keep the friendship going and I still don't care whether they call or not. I have no plans in future to call unless they call. Right now we are on a business basis. My heart has moved on I really have no connection to them anymore. No energy for them no time for them, no plans for them . If we meet at gatherings and events, no problem but that is how far it will go. Sooo true. This goes too for general friendships,😃😃😃😃😃😃😃
This works on family as well. 😊😊😊friends, men…etc. People make time for who and what is important to them. I think as women we get emotionally attached to easily. Love is like a seed. It needs a growing environment and then nurtured accordingly.
OMG 🤣 This killed me --> "When you can see a slippery slope, instead of you trying to buy him with gifts, you cut the rope so he can slide all the way down and out of your life 🤣" Thanks for this, I needed this to deal with a silly infatuation (or maybe love) I am going through right now.
Recently went through this type of situation. I didn’t call or text. His silence was all I needed to know it was time to move on. This video was right on time, and made me laugh 😂. Thanks auntie Fumi! 😊💕
This is a word on this beautiful Sunday in sunny California! I’m literally going through this right this moment and I haven’t budged in reaching out to inquire with him. Thanks for this confirmation, I woke up today feeling like “it’s been almost a week, should I text or call” but my head is as screaming NO! I know in my heart of heart this guy isn’t the one for me and I have to allow the universe to guide and protect me. I need to trust the process and have faith. Thank you, Sis! ❤
I remember words I've read in Dr. John Gray wrote in Mars and Venus dating: Each failed relationship brings you closer to the right one for you. You are one step closer, don't give up.
On point Fumi! This kind of behaviour is so unnecessary. We are all adults, just say this is not for me. It is plainly rude, a lack of common manners. Unfortunately I have experienced this and it was him chasing me down. We are both in our 50's! I know what I want and he knows he couldn't give it to me. I'm done with people and their foolishness, leave me alone if you're a commitment phobo... They (male or female) need to grow up and find a back bone - nonesense!
😱 55 yr old cowardly man-boys are ghosting. shameful. &💩 reeks of d.l. bisexual energy bc a real men🤴don't ghost. they say: its not working. 🥳we must learn to celebrate getting ghosted bc the universe taken a lying undercover gay man from our life!! 👏
I met this guy once, I thought we connected on all levels, thought I finally found someone interesting. I left it up to him to make plans, he kept on postponing then completely dissappeared, that left me so disappointed so I "left him alone".
This is so true what you are saying. Don't be clingy, give space. Most time in the beginning things are sweet until they start showing their true colors.
I've done this and have wore the T-Shirt BUT I'VE LEARNED FROM IT. Fumi is Absolutely Correct...Do Nothing. I had 3 guys actually come back to me BUT I'd moved on. One guy actually waited until I was Engaged. By that time My Attitude was HE HAD HIS CHANCES AND HE WHAT... HE BLEW IT. So Girls listen to your Hearts and Protect them. ❤❤❤
A guy I met in June ghosted on me because he canceled a second date with me last minute and I pulled him up about it in a feminine way. I didn't reached out to him i started dating others and having fun then he came back in august, since then he hasn't canceled on any dates and he even shows up 10 mins early lol even if he's busy he sends me a little text to say he's busy at the moment but will call later. Last week he introduce me to his friends as his girlfriend and post me on his social media even sending me flowers at work. Prior to meeting this guy i did have guy ghost on me then i was chasing him calling him, texting him stalking his social media lol BUT i use that mistake to learn my lesson and apply it to my now Guy and it works.
Honestly, if I don't hear from a guy, I don't call or check in (exes included). If something is wrong, maybe the 👮 will show up asking, "Ma'am, have you heard from him?" "Uh, no sir I have not. Have you checked in with his mother?" If a man wants you, he'll make the effort and stay consistent because he won't risk any other guy taking his place.
Aunty Fumi 🤗 where have you been in my life? Your advice are eye opening and you make women feel valuable and bring out the self-respect that we need to have. I ❤️ you for being who you are. God bless your family always 🙏🏼 ❤️
Words spoken so so truly and speaking the truth. I myself have been that person to many times. As a gay man in my circle of friends I have always been the face, the body etc. Yes, I can pull a man but nothing lasted. Starts off great then the ghosting. Like you said, I just started doing me and if you come back great if not even greater. But thks for words and great advice. Love D.
ABOUT GHOSTING: In all sorts of relationship dissolutions we can get preoccupied with whether the other person ever really valued us anyway. We can’t get a clear answer because there’s evidence either way. It can be maddening, sorting through the rubble. But we can change this for ourselves if the reason we give for walking away is not “they don’t care for me” but “they’re not able to provide what I need from a relationship”. That way it’s less tempting to endlessly re-examine your history together, searching for evidence of how they “really” feel. How they feel is the one thing we can never truly know. It also means that occasional glimmers of care are less likely to pull us back; if how they feel isn’t our reason for parting, it isn’t our reason for staying. Thinking this way closes the space where the humiliation gets in; it blocks the inference. It draws things back to the fact that they didn’t provide what you needed, not the thought that they looked at you and decided you weren’t worth providing for. -- By Eleanor Gordon-Smith
You are so right. When they act like they want to ghost, I disappear too. I even on an occasion have changed my cell phone number. So when he wants to finally contact me, he cannot at all. Nobody got time for the games. I get the last laugh. 😆
This was soo hard to watch Fumi but I had to. I was ghosted twice by the same guy. He is now trying to come back! I have no desire for him at all thank you Jesus 🙏🏽 🙂 ☺️! I will do better next. In fact I enjoy being alone ; I can think, plan travels and do anything I want without consulting anyone ☺️. Thank you Fumi 😊 . Singleness 💓 for life is the way I am going and I don't mind it at all!👌🏽👏🏽✨️
Fumi you have literally spoken to me directly! In my case I did exactly as you did, I distanced myself and I actually posted a little cheeky picture on my insta story after doing so with a male friend (who is gay) and this stupid boy unfollowed me instantly😂 So I blocked him and now I feel liberated. Bare in mind I had done all the mistakes before, I gave him ultimatums, I gave him the cookies (regretttt) but by God's grace we only slept with each other once as he was moving back to Italy for good! But when I decided to leave him alone and let him be in the weeks after because we had been texting, I seemed to have hit two birds with one stone because 1. He was no longer interested in me as he had discovered that he may have never been the only one, so the pride is finished and 2. I realised that I dodged the bullet from potentially wasting years on a jealous and proud man!
Just what I needed to hear, just that it's quite unfortunate that I blocked and deleted his contact after calling him twice he didn't respond and he didn't return the call even after a few days. God bless you aunty Funmi
Leave him alone. I repeated after you. I have made these mistakes in the past and I learned my lesson. Now am cool, calm and collected. Que sera sera. My mum loved that song and she'll always say it to me. I didn't get it then but I do now. Well said Fumi. You refuminised me. Love you loads.
I’m 55 & went on many dates w a man and began to trust him. He suddenly stopped interacting and a friend saw him out being very close with someone else, so I dismissed him without one word. I love myself for taking my time, not jumping in and avoiding a mistake. In my youth I wished for this wisdom and strength. It is priceless and affirming to waste no time on childish behavior🧡⭐️ Honor yourself!
Fumi, I haven’t dated in years, but I HAD TO listen to this vid when I saw it pop up because I KNEW what you were going to say. 😂😂😂In true form, as usual…..you are ABSOLUTELY RIGHT and ALWAYS ON POINT!!!! Love you!!! If he disappears, whenever he decides to come back…..make SURE he has to look for you with a flashlight in the daytime😀😀😂😂😂 in the meantime , do NOTHING!!! Yassssssss!
Auntie Fumi, love, love, love you ☺️😘 l'm 32 and still single. At a certain point I was very desperate and acting somehow crazy with guys I date. You gave me life !
Bonjour Queen Fumi!🧡💐 Preach sis! Say it loud for those at the back of the pew to hear and let the church say AMEN for this words of wisdom!!🙏🏽🙏🏽👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Thanks auntie fumi you gave me so much strength since I joined fumi nation a guy ghost me since I became pregnant he checked on the baby in 5months for the first time he never asked which hospital I go for my antenatal never but me routine drugs or asked how I buy it I'm in my 38weeks yet he doesn't care with no support I used to be worried but listening to you speak on this I've got more strength to stand thanks for all you do God bless you
Fumi….I love the simplistic beauty of your responses to common issues. Once you start explaining why you suggest certain tactics, it’s almost common sense. When you used the skirt analogy it was so obvious what to do I was saying it right along with you! Why didn’t I think like this years ago? I’ll tell you why….SELF-RESPECT! All of Fumi’s stories have this same underlying theme. What I’ve learned from her is…WE are the Prize. WE are worth it. WE deserve the best. Once we believe this about ourselves we will automatically repel those unworthy and attract those who deserve us. Well done Fumi👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Always insightful; I have gotten so right even at the matured age 47 but it is not too late because we are turning things around. Thanks for your advice! Hugs and kisses!!
A man child 😂 ghosted me for 3 months 😅😮 told me he was returning to see me on Sunday come to find out there was another woman. I shortly found him which was a little reckless I know but digitally and his friend tried to hit on me 🤦🏽♀️ so I had to reach out and by the 3rd month he tried to come back so I told him I’m in love with somebody else 😂 it was a lie but I hurt his ego & his response: go be with him. ( he was immensely hurt) he tried to offer to take me out after ghosting me for 3 months to “make-up” it was so scary 😧 like who does that I had to go out with a bang ‼️ and give him the gift of goodbye but show him I’m not the one to mess with! 😂 ladies don’t ever let a man take advantage of you! Ever.
Watching on my TV and commenting on my phone - great talk again Sister. Thank you, thank you. Acting out of desperation never helped us. It's always good to take a step back, take several deep breaths and back away when things like this happen.
Fumi - You've distilled the years of advice our savvy mothers/nanas/parents had given us. You now present it 21st century style. After some life fumbles, we're listening now. Thanks for helping these younguns (young and old)!
I remember I made the first mistake because I didn't know that I was being ghosted. After meeting this guy, he ghosted me and since he usually took atleast 24 hours to reply, I thought he was busy. Until I saw he read my messages and blue ticked me. I had to learn to let it be without the satisfaction of knowing what I had done. Never make that mistake again🤗
First thing: You are absolutely gorgeous! I fear I have done everything you said not to do but I had not yet seen this video lol...I believe I can leave him alone though and occupy myself with other things that really matter! This video really encouraged me to focus on my journey!
Golden nuggets.. I soooo needed this! Thank you Lord for this Queen!!👑🙏🏾💯💯💯💯💯 She got me together because I was losing. I’ve watched this 3x times to let it sink in..
Fumi my sister, you are the greatest. I hope these women and girls on your chanel take this advice. My mum has a saying pertaining to many women, "before none, any."This means, before they have no man, they settle for any man.
Great advice, Fumi!! this recently happened to me and, as you mentioned, I immediately thought that I did something wrong. I was shocked and confused by it; but, then I started to make a list of EVERYTHING - good and bad and guess which side was longer!! After some self-reflection, I came back to myself and realized that I am the prize and it is definitely HIS loss. As soon as I accepted that - there was a Peace that I couldn't explain. And wouldn't you know he called not too long after that. I STILL do not know what he wanted - for all I know he called me by mistake!! I love your channel and your content!!
Thanks Auntie Fumi. Wish I had this advice when I was ghosted in 2017, but these are wonderful reminders of what to do and not to do. My ghosting was sudden. I met his friends a few days earlier, we talked up to the night before he went mute. That night, he said he was unwell and go to the hosp the following day (Sunday), asked for a loan and I sent him something small (less than he had requested and told him it wasn't a loan- you never get the money back anyway). That Sunday, I reached out to him after church to find out which hosp he had gone and if he had been hospitalised. Never took my calls or texts. I stopped sent once a day text for two days to follow up on the hosp visit and did all that you said we shouldn't do. Apologise, call, and blame myself. He would just blue-tick my messages. Gave him space and blocked him after 21 days...just to focus on me. He.had been pushing for marriage and gotten a couple to mentor us, reading books about marriage, talking about our future, etc. I was always the one just taking it easy, one step at a time. Thankfully, I never slept with him. Whilst the ghosting was painful, what took longer to heal was the hope I had developed slowly about getting married, having a future with kids, and working in ministry together. Took me 2-3 years +therapy to grieve this loss. Would you believe that exactly one year later, he showed up at an event and talked to few pals of mine (I wasn't with them when they were chatting) and he would refer to me (when they asked him what happened to us) as his girlfriend! A 'girlfriend' he had ghosted and not spoken in a year. I shut him all the way down when I found out. The audacity of some men😏😂 PS: I learnt never to rationalise someone's actions. No matter how many scenarios I came up with for getting ghosted, the truth is I will never know. He knows and made the decision to do so. And there is no need to ask why. The person ghosting makes a conscious decision to avoid communication. That's enough evidence to know it's time to move on and invest time and energy on people who are better communicators
I needed this today. Thank you so much Fumi. I feel myself falling in love recently and being ghosted hurts a lot, but your view on things makes it way more logical and reasonable. Thanks for everything ❤
I could say I wish I had this advice before now. But I feel it's come at the best possible time. I officially quit carrying the burden of my old mistakes and other people's mistakes... I'm definitely freeing myself from the bondage... #LEAVEHIMALONE #GETBUSY #KEEPBUSY #KEEPITMOVING #DONOTHING
Say goodbye, take your friends out for dinner and celebrate the fact that you have found out that he's not the one now enstead of later. Never ever go chasing a man, it's thier job to chase us. If they show that they are a ethical, kind person who always treats you like a queen and treats everyone with respect they are a keeper, If they ghost you they have done you a favor. If someone shows you who they are believe them the first time.
Hey Fumi!!! Thanks for this!! This is so true . Buy what gifts , or dinner ...lool!!! he should be so lucky i wont event call in the first instance, i have been told im cold they always come circling back
LEAVE HIM ALONE... Wooooooooow! Here you spoke like a loving Psychologist.. Amazing I listened to this at the right time. Much love from South Africa 💖
Thank you so much for this mama Fumi. I took this bold step and ended my 7years relationship last December and I'm grateful I did. All you've said here were all the red flags I saw but I still wanted to hold on, thank God I let go.
Absolutely priceless information, not even money can buy this type of knowledge. Thank you mama Fumi for sharing your wisdom with us. Here are some flowers you 💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐 💐 💐💐💐💐💐🫶🏾🙏🏾
I came here to type the same, but you said it much better than I could ever express. Women of substance. Im so glad we have you all to look up to!
Aunty Fumi said what? “And I Quote LEAVE HIM ALONE!!!!!” It’s hard pill to swallow at this point.however ,that is a powerhouse advice given !!❤️ Tell yourself to calm down and act as if you don’t care about him for so ever! And try to happy yourself to the fullest! Thank you sis❤️👍
any so-called man💁♂️ who has the unmitigated gall to ghost. is an immature lame child mentality loser whose beneath u thus, NEVER deserved u. 🥳celebrate his absence w/silence!!!
You are rigbt
I have learned the gift of goodbye. If someone don’t treat you right, ghost you, etc., consider it as the gift of a lifetime…literally!
I recently got ghosted. I prayed and asked God to show me who he was then let go. It can be a gift in disguise.
One word comes to mind when I listen to the sister to sister episodes: self-control. Which stems from self respect, which is a by product of self-love. Thank you for being a voice of substance, Fumi.
Absolutely!!!
❤Amen
This is exactly what I did! Thank you queen 👍❤️
Agree..if women could just love themselves more and demand respect, then the rest flows automatically. You don‘t even care and realize you dodged a bullet, a miserable guy who does not deserve you. Move on…. The best way to heal is to meet another guy or several dating candidates
I had to screenshot this. ♥️
Also know that the love and heartache you feel now WILL FADE! It doesn’t feel like it at the time, but trust. I had my heart crushed to pieces by a man I thought was my forever - and then he ghosted. I did everything Fumi said not to do, lol! But then, years later when I was engaged to my now husband, I thought of that man, and for the life of me I couldn’t remember his last name! Back then, I thought it would become MY last name too, but now I couldn’t remember it. It was wonderful perspective. This too will pass. Better things ahead.
I totally agree Sis… the best thing we can do is stay focused!
Thanks for sharing
Going through it right now 😖😖😖😖 I know better days will come..thank you 🥺🥹
@@daphineisingoma750 you are strong, this is the best video for you. Love for yourself and love from God. He will never ghost you.
FACTS!!!! 💪🏼
I had a guy ghost 👻 me like that and I found out he was already in a relationship! If a guy really liked you he will not ghost you ! Great advice!
Remember this:
-If a man really wants you, nothing will keep him away. If he doesn’t, nothing will make him stay.
-No response is a response
-Take mixed signals as a no
ABSOLUTELY!! My husband literally PURSUED me while I was in school. He was a preacher, but, he made the time to travel to my city just to visit me, and make me know he meant business.
These statements hit home for me. Especially number 2….thank you!
Yes. Yes. Yessssssss so true.
Yes!
I needed this, thank you
Aunty is preaching today! I was just saying, "AMEN, SISTER!!"
I ghosted on a guy who thought he'd ghosted on me. I was so into him, but my self-esteem just couldn't take the manipulation any more. And I left. Not a word, no goodbyes.
He resurfaced in my final year of college, and by then, I'd met my current husband who'd taught me how to enjoy being chased by a man.
Now Look at that....Go Girllllll🔥🔥🔥
You're on point my sister.....ladies take notes. Don't ever run down a man.
Stop calling or texting.
Exactly don’t bother him
He ghosted me, had the audacity to come back months later talking about "I dreamt about you "
I then open up about my feelings hoping this time we can move forward and build something (yes I know I was stupid ) ..
I got a nonchalant response ...
I just don't get why some men play these games sometimes...
Safe to say I feel a bit deflated but I deleted his number and chat 😌
I never blame myself. If he’s gone, he’s gone! I assume something is going on with him, and I thank the LORD he didn’t drag me in it! I’m not calling him PERIOD! If he’s dead, it will be in the paper. BYE!
Lol, too funny!
😂😂😂love this, same!!
Whew I LOVE IT!
I had a friend and by nature I call to check and realized, they never called unless I called. I stopped all the calls and texts and was like whatever. They now call and are trying to keep the friendship going and I still don't care whether they call or not. I have no plans in future to call unless they call. Right now we are on a business basis. My heart has moved on I really have no connection to them anymore. No energy for them no time for them, no plans for them . If we meet at gatherings and events, no problem but that is how far it will go. Sooo true.
This goes too for general friendships,😃😃😃😃😃😃😃
This works on family as well. 😊😊😊friends, men…etc. People make time for who and what is important to them. I think as women we get emotionally attached to easily. Love is like a seed. It needs a growing environment and then nurtured accordingly.
OMG 🤣 This killed me --> "When you can see a slippery slope, instead of you trying to buy him with gifts, you cut the rope so he can slide all the way down and out of your life 🤣" Thanks for this, I needed this to deal with a silly infatuation (or maybe love) I am going through right now.
She is so funny🤣🤣🤣🤣
😂😂
Recently went through this type of situation. I didn’t call or text. His silence was all I needed to know it was time to move on. This video was right on time, and made me laugh 😂. Thanks auntie Fumi! 😊💕
Proud of you ❤
Totally agree with this statement, went through the same and did exactly the same. We need to start knowing our worth as women. His loss I say. 😊
Same here being in relationship for 3 months then ghosted me will I was recovering from an illness. Just let him be
I have really enjoyed this ☺ thanks for your knowledge mama
❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤I love you mummy
This is a word on this beautiful Sunday in sunny California! I’m literally going through this right this moment and I haven’t budged in reaching out to inquire with him. Thanks for this confirmation, I woke up today feeling like “it’s been almost a week, should I text or call” but my head is as screaming NO! I know in my heart of heart this guy isn’t the one for me and I have to allow the universe to guide and protect me. I need to trust the process and have faith. Thank you, Sis! ❤
You ladies just don't know the secret.
Be well and best wishes
Love to get to know you. Blessings.
I remember words I've read in Dr. John Gray wrote in Mars and Venus dating: Each failed relationship brings you closer to the right one for you. You are one step closer, don't give up.
Stay strong
Fumi, 9 times outta 10 he's simply already more invested with another relationship😫
Since I’m born again I’m never gonna sleep with a man till marriage praise God !
good luck…..like buying a car without a test drive.
God bless you, me too
😂😂😂 what if you die
@@gracemunich1476😅cool
Im on a situation like this.I like your advice.I learn a lot.
On point Fumi! This kind of behaviour is so unnecessary. We are all adults, just say this is not for me. It is plainly rude, a lack of common manners. Unfortunately I have experienced this and it was him chasing me down. We are both in our 50's! I know what I want and he knows he couldn't give it to me. I'm done with people and their foolishness, leave me alone if you're a commitment phobo... They (male or female) need to grow up and find a back bone - nonesense!
😱 55 yr old cowardly man-boys are ghosting. shameful. &💩 reeks of d.l. bisexual energy bc a real men🤴don't ghost. they say: its not working. 🥳we must learn to celebrate getting ghosted bc the universe taken a lying undercover gay man from our life!! 👏
I'm with you sis 👋
I met this guy once, I thought we connected on all levels, thought I finally found someone interesting. I left it up to him to make plans, he kept on postponing then completely dissappeared, that left me so disappointed so I "left him alone".
When this behavior would happen to me, I followed my instincts and focused on me, myself and I and moved on. It's hard but you can do it....
exactly….do not allow anyone dis-respect you. Move on….
Same! You're right!
This is so true what you are saying. Don't be clingy, give space. Most time in the beginning things are sweet until they start showing their true colors.
I've done this and have wore the T-Shirt BUT I'VE LEARNED FROM IT. Fumi is Absolutely Correct...Do Nothing. I had 3 guys actually come back to me BUT I'd moved on. One guy actually waited until I was Engaged. By that time My Attitude was HE HAD HIS CHANCES AND HE WHAT... HE BLEW IT. So Girls listen to your Hearts and Protect them. ❤❤❤
I love it, congratulations on your engagement.
A guy I met in June ghosted on me because he canceled a second date with me last minute and I pulled him up about it in a feminine way. I didn't reached out to him i started dating others and having fun then he came back in august, since then he hasn't canceled on any dates and he even shows up 10 mins early lol even if he's busy he sends me a little text to say he's busy at the moment but will call later. Last week he introduce me to his friends as his girlfriend and post me on his social media even sending me flowers at work. Prior to meeting this guy i did have guy ghost on me then i was chasing him calling him, texting him stalking his social media lol BUT i use that mistake to learn my lesson and apply it to my now Guy and it works.
Wow.....this is true.....a mature persons will confront you and tell you if you did wrong. Not ghost
Honestly, if I don't hear from a guy, I don't call or check in (exes included). If something is wrong, maybe the 👮 will show up asking, "Ma'am, have you heard from him?"
"Uh, no sir I have not. Have you checked in with his mother?"
If a man wants you, he'll make the effort and stay consistent because he won't risk any other guy taking his place.
Its abusive behaviour.. let the ghost be the ghoast.. and do you.
I would never call. If he's dead, he'll never know I DID NOT call anyway.
Ice cold 😂
Aunty Fumi 🤗 where have you been in my life? Your advice are eye opening and you make women feel valuable and bring out the self-respect that we need to have. I ❤️ you for being who you are. God bless your family always 🙏🏼 ❤️
I know right.
Words spoken so so truly and speaking the truth. I myself have been that person to many times. As a gay man in my circle of friends I have always been the face, the body etc. Yes, I can pull a man but nothing lasted. Starts off great then the ghosting. Like you said, I just started doing me and if you come back great if not even greater. But thks for words and great advice. Love D.
Learning never ends
Fumi knows her stuff. Don’t check the man. Check your self esteem.
ABOUT GHOSTING: In all sorts of relationship dissolutions we can get preoccupied with whether the other person ever really valued us anyway. We can’t get a clear answer because there’s evidence either way. It can be maddening, sorting through the rubble.
But we can change this for ourselves if the reason we give for walking away is not “they don’t care for me” but “they’re not able to provide what I need from a relationship”.
That way it’s less tempting to endlessly re-examine your history together, searching for evidence of how they “really” feel. How they feel is the one thing we can never truly know. It also means that occasional glimmers of care are less likely to pull us back; if how they feel isn’t our reason for parting, it isn’t our reason for staying.
Thinking this way closes the space where the humiliation gets in; it blocks the inference. It draws things back to the fact that they didn’t provide what you needed, not the thought that they looked at you and decided you weren’t worth providing for.
-- By Eleanor Gordon-Smith
I wish my 20-something year old me knew this but it's not too late
You are so right. When they act like they want to ghost, I disappear too. I even on an occasion have changed my cell phone number. So when he wants to finally contact me, he cannot at all. Nobody got time for the games. I get the last laugh. 😆
Hell he text me and asked me what happened I didn't called I told him I love to stay in my lane and move on lol
This was soo hard to watch Fumi but I had to. I was ghosted twice by the same guy. He is now trying to come back! I have no desire for him at all thank you Jesus 🙏🏽 🙂 ☺️!
I will do better next. In fact I enjoy being alone ; I can think, plan travels and do anything I want without consulting anyone ☺️.
Thank you Fumi 😊 . Singleness 💓 for life is the way I am going and I don't mind it at all!👌🏽👏🏽✨️
Girl keep on walking away, your mental health is more important.
Fumi you have literally spoken to me directly! In my case I did exactly as you did, I distanced myself and I actually posted a little cheeky picture on my insta story after doing so with a male friend (who is gay) and this stupid boy unfollowed me instantly😂 So I blocked him and now I feel liberated. Bare in mind I had done all the mistakes before, I gave him ultimatums, I gave him the cookies (regretttt) but by God's grace we only slept with each other once as he was moving back to Italy for good! But when I decided to leave him alone and let him be in the weeks after because we had been texting, I seemed to have hit two birds with one stone because 1. He was no longer interested in me as he had discovered that he may have never been the only one, so the pride is finished and 2. I realised that I dodged the bullet from potentially wasting years on a jealous and proud man!
Just what I needed to hear, just that it's quite unfortunate that I blocked and deleted his contact after calling him twice he didn't respond and he didn't return the call even after a few days. God bless you aunty Funmi
Leave him alone. I repeated after you. I have made these mistakes in the past and I learned my lesson. Now am cool, calm and collected. Que sera sera. My mum loved that song and she'll always say it to me. I didn't get it then but I do now. Well said Fumi. You refuminised me. Love you loads.
Thank you for this video, a guy ghosted me a few days ago when I told him I was a single parent, despite us getting on really well.
Good riddance, for the right man children are blessings,not burdens.
You can show them better than tell anyone anything. My motto.
Fumi...sis, you are saving us from the frogs that we kiss and you are saving us from ourselves. Sis, you rock! Thank you and Amen!
I’m 55 & went on many dates w a man and began to trust him. He suddenly stopped interacting and a friend saw him out being very close with someone else, so I dismissed him without one word.
I love myself for taking my time, not jumping in and avoiding a mistake.
In my youth I wished for this wisdom and strength.
It is priceless and affirming to waste no time on childish behavior🧡⭐️
Honor yourself!
You're just GORGEOUS for NO reason 😅
I feel like if he ghost you, its like a dog who bites you and have to be put down. Let him go, he is doing you a favor.
#ouch but real ❤
Fumi, I haven’t dated in years, but I HAD TO listen to this vid when I saw it pop up because I KNEW what you were going to say. 😂😂😂In true form, as usual…..you are ABSOLUTELY RIGHT and ALWAYS ON POINT!!!! Love you!!! If he disappears, whenever he decides to come back…..make SURE he has to look for you with a flashlight in the daytime😀😀😂😂😂 in the meantime , do NOTHING!!! Yassssssss!
I'm rolling😂😂 make sure he look for you with a flashlight in the day time 🤣🤣🤣
ABSOLUTELY NOTHING..GET IT?
@@tanyatutt7282 🤣🤣😂I was so rolling too😅😅that was hilarious!!!😂
Auntie Fumi, love, love, love you ☺️😘 l'm 32 and still single. At a certain point I was very desperate and acting somehow crazy with guys I date. You gave me life !
@lmana you are young and lovely .. don’t ever be desperate!!! Ever! I’m 60 and I speak from experience
as a 23 year old who’s just started dating in recent years, this has helped so much! thanks so much fumi 💕
It’s 3:50 am and soon as you said don’t answer for him, my ex calls🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣. This dude is never getting my heart again.
Fumi, you are fantastic in you advice regardless of our age. I am 84 and still learning from you.🌹🌹🙏🙏
Bonjour Queen Fumi!🧡💐
Preach sis! Say it loud for those at the back of the pew to hear and let the church say AMEN for this words of wisdom!!🙏🏽🙏🏽👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
C'est ça!!ameeeen!!!
Thanks auntie fumi you gave me so much strength since I joined fumi nation a guy ghost me since I became pregnant he checked on the baby in 5months for the first time he never asked which hospital I go for my antenatal never but me routine drugs or asked how I buy it I'm in my 38weeks yet he doesn't care with no support I used to be worried but listening to you speak on this I've got more strength to stand thanks for all you do God bless you
Fumi….I love the simplistic beauty of your responses to common issues. Once you start explaining why you suggest certain tactics, it’s almost common sense. When you used the skirt analogy it was so obvious what to do I was saying it right along with you! Why didn’t I think like this years ago? I’ll tell you why….SELF-RESPECT! All of Fumi’s stories have this same underlying theme. What I’ve learned from her is…WE are the Prize. WE are worth it. WE deserve the best. Once we believe this about ourselves we will automatically repel those unworthy and attract those who deserve us. Well done Fumi👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Always insightful; I have gotten so right even at the matured age 47 but it is not too late because we are turning things around. Thanks for your advice! Hugs and kisses!!
Men react by actions as opposed to words 💯
Aunty Fumi teaching us how to level up!
The way you laugh 😂 it's like laughing at men at their games. I love it!
A man child 😂 ghosted me for 3 months 😅😮 told me he was returning to see me on Sunday come to find out there was another woman. I shortly found him which was a little reckless I know but digitally and his friend tried to hit on me 🤦🏽♀️ so I had to reach out and by the 3rd month he tried to come back so I told him I’m in love with somebody else 😂 it was a lie but I hurt his ego & his response: go be with him. ( he was immensely hurt) he tried to offer to take me out after ghosting me for 3 months to “make-up” it was so scary 😧 like who does that I had to go out with a bang ‼️ and give him the gift of goodbye but show him I’m not the one to mess with! 😂 ladies don’t ever let a man take advantage of you! Ever.
It’s Fumi’s all knowing laugh for me 😂 we live we love darling 🙌🏾🙌🏾
Watching on my TV and commenting on my phone - great talk again Sister. Thank you, thank you. Acting out of desperation never helped us. It's always good to take a step back, take several deep breaths and back away when things like this happen.
Oh wow...to think I dealt on this same 'ghosting' topic today on my channel but for men...wow wow. Well-done FDV
I love you Fumi. You just saved me from a bad situation.
Fumi - You've distilled the years of advice our savvy mothers/nanas/parents had given us. You now present it 21st century style. After some life fumbles, we're listening now. Thanks for helping these younguns (young and old)!
And alot of women apologise to man when they have been wronged. I LOVED IT WHEN YOU SPOKE about that and the tone you used .
I remember I made the first mistake because I didn't know that I was being ghosted. After meeting this guy, he ghosted me and since he usually took atleast 24 hours to reply, I thought he was busy. Until I saw he read my messages and blue ticked me. I had to learn to let it be without the satisfaction of knowing what I had done. Never make that mistake again🤗
Currently going through this right now. I made all the mistakes mentioned in this video. I now know better. Thank You Aunty Fumi.
First thing: You are absolutely gorgeous! I fear I have done everything you said not to do but I had not yet seen this video lol...I believe I can leave him alone though and occupy myself with other things that really matter! This video really encouraged me to focus on my journey!
Golden nuggets.. I soooo needed this! Thank you Lord for this Queen!!👑🙏🏾💯💯💯💯💯 She got me together because I was losing. I’ve watched this 3x times to let it sink in..
I'm going through this currently and it's even too soon for him to be acting this way. I appreciate you so much for this wisdom you keep sharing ❤️
Love your corner, your practical insight and your contagious laughter. Always learning more from you. Bless
Two videos today? We are blessed. Thanks, aunt Fums. ❤
I cannot find any fault in your information , you are spot-on Fumi . Brilliant video enjoyed it thank you 👍
I’m loving that lady cartoon in the intro!! She just makes me wanna groove🥰💃🏻
You look stunning today! Such a beautiful woman inside and out.
Fumi my sister, you are the greatest. I hope these women and girls on your chanel take this advice. My mum has a saying pertaining to many women, "before none, any."This means, before they have no man, they settle for any man.
Great advice, Fumi!! this recently happened to me and, as you mentioned, I immediately thought that I did something wrong. I was shocked and confused by it; but, then I started to make a list of EVERYTHING - good and bad and guess which side was longer!! After some self-reflection, I came back to myself and realized that I am the prize and it is definitely HIS loss. As soon as I accepted that - there was a Peace that I couldn't explain. And wouldn't you know he called not too long after that. I STILL do not know what he wanted - for all I know he called me by mistake!! I love your channel and your content!!
Correct. Value yourself ladies.
Thanks Auntie Fumi. Wish I had this advice when I was ghosted in 2017, but these are wonderful reminders of what to do and not to do.
My ghosting was sudden. I met his friends a few days earlier, we talked up to the night before he went mute. That night, he said he was unwell and go to the hosp the following day (Sunday), asked for a loan and I sent him something small (less than he had requested and told him it wasn't a loan- you never get the money back anyway). That Sunday, I reached out to him after church to find out which hosp he had gone and if he had been hospitalised. Never took my calls or texts. I stopped sent once a day text for two days to follow up on the hosp visit and did all that you said we shouldn't do. Apologise, call, and blame myself.
He would just blue-tick my messages. Gave him space and blocked him after 21 days...just to focus on me.
He.had been pushing for marriage and gotten a couple to mentor us, reading books about marriage, talking about our future, etc. I was always the one just taking it easy, one step at a time. Thankfully, I never slept with him.
Whilst the ghosting was painful, what took longer to heal was the hope I had developed slowly about getting married, having a future with kids, and working in ministry together. Took me 2-3 years +therapy to grieve this loss.
Would you believe that exactly one year later, he showed up at an event and talked to few pals of mine (I wasn't with them when they were chatting) and he would refer to me (when they asked him what happened to us) as his girlfriend! A 'girlfriend' he had ghosted and not spoken in a year.
I shut him all the way down when I found out. The audacity of some men😏😂
PS: I learnt never to rationalise someone's actions. No matter how many scenarios I came up with for getting ghosted, the truth is I will never know. He knows and made the decision to do so. And there is no need to ask why. The person ghosting makes a conscious decision to avoid communication. That's enough evidence to know it's time to move on and invest time and energy on people who are better communicators
Hugs 🤗🤗🤗
Never never never never give a guy money. If he is penniless, I know he’s not the one for me. So sorry this happened to you.
Thanks you for sharing your storie with us
@@montanasky2253 I don't buy men gifts or loan money. #Exploiters
Be thankful, some times rejection is God's protection❣
Uauuuuu I love when you give advice that not even my mother would dream of telling me. Today you have stopped all my tears 😭.
The throwing of hands when you said "leave him alone." 🤣🤣🤣
POP THAT collar indeed thank you so much for the great advice I needed to hear this today.
No lies told here!!! 🎯🎯🎯
Fumi, you are so on point. Ladies please listen because we truly run this world. Don't worry because one day the best will be knocking at your door.
The problem can be solved by hitting the block and delete button on people who go ghost.
I needed this today. Thank you so much Fumi. I feel myself falling in love recently and being ghosted hurts a lot, but your view on things makes it way more logical and reasonable. Thanks for everything ❤
I needed this! Thank you Mama Fumi for always setting us STRAIGHT!!!!!
All I can say is " Thank You, Thank You!!! You are such an amazing positive human being. I love you❤
I could say I wish I had this advice before now.
But I feel it's come at the best possible time. I officially quit carrying the burden of my old mistakes and other people's mistakes...
I'm definitely freeing myself from the bondage...
#LEAVEHIMALONE
#GETBUSY
#KEEPBUSY
#KEEPITMOVING
#DONOTHING
Say goodbye, take your friends out for dinner and celebrate the fact that you have found out that he's not the one now enstead of later. Never ever go chasing a man, it's thier job to chase us. If they show that they are a ethical, kind person who always treats you like a queen and treats everyone with respect they are a keeper, If they ghost you they have done you a favor. If someone shows you who they are believe them the first time.
I needed to hear these valuable messages this Sunday morning.
Fumi ,I stand behind you and I'm even smiling because you are sooo right. Young people please listen to Auntie Fumi and learn💗
Hey Fumi!!! Thanks for this!! This is so true . Buy what gifts , or dinner ...lool!!! he should be so lucky i wont event call in the first instance, i have been told im cold they always come circling back
You are beautiful. This shirt really looks good on you.
You have the best advice ever, wish I could of had you in my life long time ago. Thank you Fumi
LEAVE HIM ALONE...
Wooooooooow! Here you spoke like a loving Psychologist.. Amazing
I listened to this at the right time.
Much love from South Africa 💖
There's always loads of wisdom coming from you when you speak. More power Anty Fumi 💪
You give such great and sound advice. So classy, meticulous full of wisdom.
Oh my god
I love her so much for this video
She’s such a queen !😭💗
Dont chase him let him go he wasnt meant for you in long run if he just was not into you only play games to get what he want which was lust money
Rejection is God's protection, have a stiff drink 🍸 and move on with life.
Thank you so much for this mama Fumi. I took this bold step and ended my 7years relationship last December and I'm grateful I did. All you've said here were all the red flags I saw but I still wanted to hold on, thank God I let go.
Love the way how you deliver your speech ❤❤❤ thank you and God Bless You❤❤❤