Have you watched part one of this story? Please find the link to the first episode here: th-cam.com/video/j9AQXoyNNUU/w-d-xo.htmlsi=DzCrgKBfzvv5Dnvg What message do you have for George Chacha? You can reach him through his number: +254722381547. To share your story with us, send an email to yvonne.kawira@tuko.co.ke or eucabeth.mukami@tuko.co.ke.
Really sorry Mr. George! I also kinda feel sad how my parents raised me. I always felt unloved as opposed to my younger two siblings whom I felt were preferred to me. I never heard any affirmations! Always expecting being reprimanded, and I feared and hated my mother. I remember one time when I was in class 7 I could not acknowledge my mother as my own mother, but I quickly acknowledged that she was the mother to my other siblings. I remember one day she commented in mother tongue, " I'll beat that round head of yours" then I was around 11 years and that really affected me, and I hated myself and that's when I knew that I had a round head! how I wished I could hide myself from people so that they could not see my round head, and that affects me even now in my thirties. Once I made some mistake and she told me that I behave like my father, my father always stayed upcountry and he was not successful in life despite the fact he had spent 5 years in Canada, notwithstanding he started earning early in his life after finishing form four. But he has nothing to show, he never even paid for our school fees. I mean I feel that my esteem was killed by my parent while I was in primary school and that has affected me in my grown up years. I am not confident anyway, always feeling a burden to people, I feel I don't fit in the society, I tend to isolate myself so others could be happy. I'm really in a mess!
Thanks, Yvonne for hosting me. How I wish that no other parent walks down the painful road I walked. How I wish other children walk a better road than mine walked.
I appreciate you for being ever so generous with your story and willing to encourage others who are struggling with these issues. God bless you and keep you. I look forward to hosting you once again on a different topic.
"The boy would do everything in the house" says a lot about the balance in the family. There is nothing normal with one child in the family doing all the chores. There is nothing wrong with chores but those tasks should have been allocated equally among the three children. That child had built up trauma. Though i feel sorry for the family, hopefully parents should learn that this generation is more sensitive so traditional upbringing does not work.
Firstly, I sympathise with you and may your son's soul rest in peace. Secondly, I would like to share my sentiments drawn from my experience battling with bipolar disorder. 1. Mental illness like hypertension is a silent killer. Most victims are afraid of speaking out even to their closest family because of fear of judgment and fear of being a burden. 2. Let's normalise asking questions like are you okay? How can I help you? 3. Dear African parents, stop being dictators and always imposing decisions on your children. Connect more then correct.
Most of us who are firstborns and parents think we came at the wrong time we ruined there future...we pray that God heals us our traumas and make us more intentional parents
Never ever put a blame on yourself sir, you did your Best that God would want you to do. Parenting is not that simple as people think, you loved your son with your heart and God knows that. May your son sleep well🕊🕊🕊
This child needed more emotional help and support during a time when his parents were emotionally unavailable coz they were busy fighting with each other
It would be an absolute honor to hear from the boy's mom, maybe get her perspective on the whole issue, her marriage, her children, the death of her son and how it has impacted her life and well being... Im not big on this but for this particular story I feel like it will be nice to hear her side of the story... It almost feels like there's a lot missing by not getting her perspective
He is explaining how he was busy making money and had related badly with his ex wife and he didn't know it was affecting the mental health of his kids.What do you want to hear from his ex wife? That the boy had no mental illness? Anyone who takes their life is not in their normal self.
Yvonne seeing a personal therapist once or twice a month for you is key. Do not take the stories you hear in your show for granted. Traumas never choose or segregate or spare anyone. One day you will remember me for this. I care about you.
I beg to differ. I went through the same thing and thoughts as the son. My siblings were favored because they were bright with being bought whatever they wanted. This was not the same for me. I was beaten, and not the other two. I became suicidal while in class seven and even crafted a letter. Somehow I shaked it off, accepted the situation and decided to keep quiet and do my thing. I used to cry everyday but what kept me going is the fact that at the end of it all I will finalize school and be away from them. Hee, it wasn't easy but here I am. My two siblings still have access to opportunities I wished I had and are given resources. But this does not affect me anymore. I mind my business and focus on working on me, which I am proud off. Funny thing, my parents still somehow do not know about this. For the longest I despised my mother since the mistreatment was worse from her. Stop blaming the ENEMY bana. Its you parents who are the cause. I still cry to date and the trauma is worse, I no longer go home.
Saw a part of this interview in Tiktok and ran here 🥺🥺 For sure mental health is a big concern esp among yourhs😢. I wish we understand this as youths,before venturing into parenthood🤲🤲
Mental health is a disease like any other, it is not the spirits, its not the parent or spouse's fault. It is a disease like any other. you did your best according to what you knew then. Don't beat yourself up. You did a good job raising them all.
Listening to you, I feel like I am the boy you are talking about, I grew up knowing that am a burden to my dad, he called a family meeting one day and said he is done with me, I hated marriage I hated him, in Form 1 I swore never to get married coz I never wanted to have a child and name him after my dad, Am in my 30's now, I visit home, I pretend all is all well but I know deep down something changed along time ago,
seek therapy and counseling, and believe in hope and triumph. Do not let your parent's treatment destroy your life. They have lived theirs, and most did not know what love is. Set a new better pattern for you and your generation. If possible tell them wether they agree or not it will free your heart
I am very sorry for this parent. From the narration, it seems that your child had an underlying mental health condition that had not been diagnosed. Unfortunately such children suffer a lot of abuse and discrimination due to a fault that is not theirs. You tried to give the best and his death was not your fault.
Thank you so much for saying this. It is such a painful thing for a parent as they keep wondering what more they could have done to avoid this kind of outcome. Thanks for the kind words. George Chacha wants people to learn through his experience.
This was not a mental problem, from the narration, they never showed him love. I hate those family parliament in my life, it makes some children feel bad. They must be using harsh words towards the boy especially the father
Hi kawera thiz story Haz rily touched me Mimi wazazi wangu wameishi kunichukia from class seven til date I am mentally sick they even hate my kids nawanaishi nao juu Niko kazi uku I feel like my kids are not ok coz I every day dream of my kids getting lost plz I jus need a counsellor staki kuacha watoi wangu 😓😓
FROM REVIVAL RESTORED TV I know that one of the hardest news to accept😪😪 is when the doctors tell you that there is nothing left to do, there are only two options: sleeping until the body collapses or be given morphine to ease the pains.If you are in such situation or know someone who is in that situation be encouraged by Isaiah 43:2-3...God will give you victory and nullify the doctor's report because there is nothing that is impossible with Him. Regards, REVIVAL RESTORED TV.
Only in Christ can you find refuge, and he is well able to erase any guilt and regrets. You did all you could, this is a spiritual battle,so relatable, Thanks so much for such encouragement. May you find comfort in God alone.
I lived exactly the life of the son(who died) of this man but I persevered so much. Talk about verbal insults, gossip, loneliness, isolation, many thoughts amongst others. This man had no idea that his son had issues and was slowly dieing from inside. His son once said that 'i will never marry'. It is because he didn't see value in a woman.
Kawira I like watching your interviews ❤ This was so deep, my take home. Punishment is not correction, " be a friend to your kids, learn to talk and have conversations with your children".
There are kids who are just born with mental illness. I think as a parent if you try your best you should count as having done your work. Even if he was not pushed to get his potential out, he would now be living a very bitter life claiming you have all along hated him and are responsible for how his life turned out. It is really being between a hard place and a rock for the parent. Sorry Mr. George but you did well while still struggling yourself.
Very sad insightful story. My 17 year old son told me with a lot of bitterness that one of the most painful thing he has carried, was that we refused to buy him a gun in village market which he had preferred to the swings. I assumed the gun was 150 and the game was 50 bop…am sure we reasoned out budget with him but his mind could not fathom. Am imagining if we had many of those incidents…the devil would have come in and played his mind
It hurts deeper when you are in the same shoes going through the same for decades , unfortunately you have people who in dire need of your strong positive part/ Personality, so as much as death was a remedy that came in handy for him,it can't be the option here but worst is struggling to be alive for the innocent ones.Though the good thing is am alive to read, listen and hear what should be the way forward. Thank you very much for sharing. It has served a wake up call before it's too late. Parents please be the best friends, confidant and guards to your children.
All my life since i was young that how i felt till today always felt my parents never love me am just pushing myself to stay alive and pushing the suicide thought away from my mind and stay strong and give my son the love that i never felt from my parent
Erase what your parents did to you by telling them even if they will not accept - it's likely. you are a different individual from them now . create relationships with other loving, kind people in church or social cycles you are a favored child of God
But why let the big boy do house chores like washing dishes, cleaning the house, washing your clothes and that of his mum....i think you as parents really made the boy suffered he was a growing man for heaven sake
@judithadhiambo4351 nop, they're not. There duties suitable for boys and those suitable for girls. Duties should be gender sensitive, especially when a child is growing...Nature of duty can affect self esteem, either positively or negatively.
He was doing too many house chores despite consistent complains to the parents? Culturally Kenyans love to make their children do their responsibilities. So incase the child get some depression, these chores pushes the child to the edge. I am so sorry for your lose. Thank you for sharing.
Doing so many house chores is an escape...... When I am not in a good mental space I clean anything and everything....For me it acts as a symptom that I am not doing ok. It helps me catch myself.
@@faithodero2706Hello namesake?. Good to hear that you understand the patterns in your case. I think I didferent things depending on the triggers e.g. cleaning, eating and shoping incase I have money. I am at the stage of empty nest and the mental struggles are different.
This is a very strong message. Thank you sir. May God comfort you and your family, bind up your broken hearts, and bless you with true inner healing. I pray that you find grace to forgive yourself and everyone else who was around your dear son. Shalom
I think when he said his son expressed to him and the mom that he hated his childhood and he felt hurt by them they should have rather apologised and tried to work with him and listened to him , rather than just tell him he's the most loved child, it seems like a way of dismissing his feelings, then him calling for a meeting but its just for telling them what they have done wrong , I feel like from this story it was more of the dad telling the kids what to do always
Great message 👏👏 infact it's yesterday that I came across a quote that says, as fathers, get close and have time for your son or sons. By doing so, you always reduce about 80% of him getting depression as he grow up. He will grow upnwith great virtues. I missed a part if he could have involved fellow brother to council out their brother too and keep cross watch of him too
Sorry George for the loss, i relate with your story i have a so with mental health and all the characteristics you said i see here, though he is on medication. They really have mood swings and sit alone with no company. Being a single mum its even hard. And most of this persons with mental health are very bright. It is well it is well 🙏🙏🙏. Rest in perfect peace 🕊️🕊️🕊️🕊️
Between the ages a child starts walking and talking to 16 years, don’t yell, scream, punish or insult them. It’s the they grasp and store information permanently. Choose your words wisely
This is really scary. My 14 year old daughter is exhibiting similar signs. I know it has a lot to do with her childhood..she witnessed me and her dad arguing since she was very young. He was an alcoholic, so there was always something to argue about. I'm thankful that this wonderful man has shared his story. I'll keep pushing my daughter to get therapy, even though she keeps saying she's okay.
@@familytherapypod you're right. Its very challenging, raising her alone in America while trying to navigate the issues she's dealing with. I just pray for God's grace
My daughter is just 12year old but she is something else l used to beat her thinking she can change but nothing changed in her she has no respect imagine 12years old its so painful l left her l came to hustle away from home so she is staying at our home with my dad and my sister but she doesn't respect both of them she can talk back at them my God am in tears everyday new story about her but l left her in Gods hands l even don't know what to do 😭😭😭 and she hates her sister so much l even don't know why all this is happening and she likes moving she cant stay in one place
😢😢 I don't know why I had to watch this, unfortunately my brother committed suicide 8th August 2023 ,he also felt like we never understood him.may they rip. How I wish my brother opened up to someone
Sorry to this guy for paying the utimate price. Hope he can heal. Most parents will usually casually pick favourites and expect the least favourite to suck it up. I confronted my parents about it and blocked them for a while saa hii nkikohoa wanaitika. They were actually very surprised coz they dint expect it. I confronted my father as a 32yr old for his sexual abuse when we were young and that how he developed diabetes. Sifurahii kugonjeka kwake but hey i needed my closure!😔
But George you have this ideology I love the most in life ,little of myself in you,thank you for being here to share I believe someone really hears this
Have never felt like I had a parent figure in my entire life....not because they're dead or something,they're much ok with the fact that there's no bond between as....to my perspective, the best gift you can give to your children is your availability....that's when they get to open up on what they are going thru
It hurts deeper when you are in the same shoes going through the same for decades , unfortunately you have people who are in dire need of your strong positive part/ Personality, so as much as death was a remedy that came in handy for him,it can't be the option here but worst is struggling to be alive for the innocent ones.Though the good thing is am alive to read, listen and hear wchat should be the way forward. Thank you very much for sharing. It has served a wake up call before it's too late. Parents please be the best friends, confidant and guards to your children.
NAJUA alot of you will not agree with me but l agree with EV. EZEKIELs teaching about everything about us should be connected to the alter of GOD nobody knows better how to raise CHILDREN we can think we are doing it right by giving them Everthing but nooo only GOD can take good care of them soo let's involve GOD More in our jobs, marriage, children,relationship, business l mean everything. may GOD heal every heart that is bleeding GOD'S GRACE BE UPON ALL OF US AMEN
I agree with you. We can't do it by ourselves. Sometimes, we think we've got it all figured out when we don't. I pray that God gives us wisdom to raise our kids
I recall reading a book by a famous Novel Writer, Daniele steel about her son battling mental health issues and how he took them for a ride as a family. They couldn't understand, why, and regardless of doing what any parent does for the betterment of their children, he ended committing suicide. 'The story of Nick Traina' made me realize mental health challenges can begin from any age and at times from the mum's womb. Your did the best you could have done.
This is so inspiring 😊😊😊thank you for the wisdom. Mental health is very important I have really learned a lot . Thank you Yvonne for hosting this wise man
According to counselling psychology, thats my field. We say that "we are the product of the environment" we are what we are because of how we were raised. Trauma is a very dangerous aspect in ones life,depression is real,bipolar,schizophrenia and other mental health related problems are actually in our society,we face these victims in our daily lives but without our concerns and knowledge about mental health issues we will think that it is okay,yet it is okay not to be okay. Theres no health without mental health
I have the same case with my son,I don’t know where i went wrong,he’s always complaining about life,he always feels like i don’t love him,am a single mother and have raised him alone since day 1 without father figure up to now,sometimes he can force me to buy something i can’t afford,moods swings in him is everytime,like now he has never talked to me for 4 days
I think your son was clinically depressed for many years considering it started at a young age (grade 4). I wish the psychiatrist did more to help him. He should have at least recommended therapy. Quite sad that you lost him😢 Praying for your comfort❤
I am 21 years old and I have struggled with suicidal though since I was like 7 years old because of how my childhood was. It is very sad for me sometimes I just pity my family. sad that they made my life terrible. but I have been doing really bad and I attempted suicide in high school. but I am trying to adapt and get over the trauma now that I am in University. It hard sometimes to get over we went through. I am sorry he lost the battle but he worn it in his own way. I will hold on till whenever.
God made you with a purpose. Follow your passion and seek therapy or talk to someone you trust. Also, pray always, and if you can, cry in secret to God or when you feel like it. Tears release stress
Ohh good Lord so sorry for your lose,may the Lord give you and your family peace and comfort. You did all you knew to do at the time to help your son,forgive yourself maybe for the thinks you feel you could have done better sir.We all want the best for our children.
May his soul rest in paradise.....as a parent i have learnt alot from this real life experience....its soo painful to realize all you could have done when its too late...thats why i work soo hard to provide to my level best as a mom and a father as well.....To my kid's,,,i love you unconditional to the galaxy and back...❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Personally, I would rather die than repeat my life from birth to high school. I started living when I became independent and that’s after graduating from college And please, don’t blame yourself for what happened to your son…you cared enough to force him to work hard. I’m sure you’d still be blaming yourself if you withheld discipline and your son failed to complete studies and became a family liability. This is what I think, your unhealthy relationship with your wife negatively affected your children and more to the one who committed suicide. I can’t sit back and let my child do whatever they want; they need guidance and sometimes it’ll mean chastising them
The comments show just how little most people know, or understand about mental illness. Before compliance, obedience, success, and other measures of success, seek wellness in your kids. Pray for your kids, but don't forget to ACT, consistently. People die from depression, they don't just off themselves.
The story resemble like mine batlteling mental health and depression the problem is that no one try to understand us I thank God am trying to over come this
The "verbal diarrhea" was the boy expressing his pain. Pain sometimes will not be expressed in a clam way. Of course someone will be angry, they will cry, they will isolate, drugs e.t.c their justice was denied and they realize this! And as the parent, of course hearing words like " you never loved me" will hurt. You need to resist DENYING the child's reality to protect yourself from feeling the pain of DISSAPOINTING your child! You are postponing problems. Listen to what your child is saying! Don't justify with bible verses and whatever philosophical knowledge you have, your child is not in some stoic or religious class. Justifications is what draws the child further away because it shows you're not interested in listening, to understand them. Walk the path of healing with your child and do not expect them to embrace you fully as if history never happened, create a new chapter.
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Have you watched part one of this story? Please find the link to the first episode here: th-cam.com/video/j9AQXoyNNUU/w-d-xo.htmlsi=DzCrgKBfzvv5Dnvg
What message do you have for George Chacha? You can reach him through his number: +254722381547.
To share your story with us, send an email to yvonne.kawira@tuko.co.ke or eucabeth.mukami@tuko.co.ke.
Sad aki... I am praying for you and your family woooye
We need to hear the other part of the story..I mean the wife
Really sorry Mr. George! I also kinda feel sad how my parents raised me. I always felt unloved as opposed to my younger two siblings whom I felt were preferred to me. I never heard any affirmations! Always expecting being reprimanded, and I feared and hated my mother. I remember one time when I was in class 7 I could not acknowledge my mother as my own mother, but I quickly acknowledged that she was the mother to my other siblings.
I remember one day she commented in mother tongue, " I'll beat that round head of yours" then I was around 11 years and that really affected me, and I hated myself and that's when I knew that I had a round head! how I wished I could hide myself from people so that they could not see my round head, and that affects me even now in my thirties.
Once I made some mistake and she told me that I behave like my father, my father always stayed upcountry and he was not successful in life despite the fact he had spent 5 years in Canada, notwithstanding he started earning early in his life after finishing form four. But he has nothing to show, he never even paid for our school fees. I mean I feel that my esteem was killed by my parent while I was in primary school and that has affected me in my grown up years. I am not confident anyway, always feeling a burden to people, I feel I don't fit in the society, I tend to isolate myself so others could be happy.
I'm really in a mess!
You are an eye opener to the parents. Sorry for the loss of your son and the pain you went through.God will take care of you and your family.
Thanks, Yvonne for hosting me. How I wish that no other parent walks down the painful road I walked. How I wish other children walk a better road than mine walked.
I appreciate you for being ever so generous with your story and willing to encourage others who are struggling with these issues.
God bless you and keep you.
I look forward to hosting you once again on a different topic.
Parenting is tough and no one is an expert.
Thanx for sharing. I have been doing it wrong😢
@@esthershiko1173 glad you learnt something from his experience.
More grace and love to you.
"The boy would do everything in the house" says a lot about the balance in the family. There is nothing normal with one child in the family doing all the chores. There is nothing wrong with chores but those tasks should have been allocated equally among the three children. That child had built up trauma. Though i feel sorry for the family, hopefully parents should learn that this generation is more sensitive so traditional upbringing does not work.
True...
Firstly, I sympathise with you and may your son's soul rest in peace.
Secondly, I would like to share my sentiments drawn from my experience battling with bipolar disorder.
1. Mental illness like hypertension is a silent killer. Most victims are afraid of speaking out even to their closest family because of fear of judgment and fear of being a burden.
2. Let's normalise asking questions like are you okay? How can I help you?
3. Dear African parents, stop being dictators and always imposing decisions on your children. Connect more then correct.
Dont ever blame yourself sir, you did your very best...May God protect our children
Most of us who are firstborns and parents think we came at the wrong time we ruined there future...we pray that God heals us our traumas and make us more intentional parents
George sounds and seems so sincere. Am sorry for what happened. A lot of lessons to be learned.
Never ever put a blame on yourself sir, you did your Best that God would want you to do. Parenting is not that simple as people think, you loved your son with your heart and God knows that. May your son sleep well🕊🕊🕊
This child needed more emotional help and support during a time when his parents were emotionally unavailable coz they were busy fighting with each other
It would be an absolute honor to hear from the boy's mom, maybe get her perspective on the whole issue, her marriage, her children, the death of her son and how it has impacted her life and well being...
Im not big on this but for this particular story I feel like it will be nice to hear her side of the story... It almost feels like there's a lot missing by not getting her perspective
He is explaining how he was busy making money and had related badly with his ex wife and he didn't know it was affecting the mental health of his kids.What do you want to hear from his ex wife? That the boy had no mental illness? Anyone who takes their life is not in their normal self.
Very true! We would like to hear from the wife and children. There seems to be more to this!
@pamelamochama1639 true. It would make more sense if we here from his wife and his eldest son
Am thinking of the same
Am thinking the same thing, let’s hear from the mother of the boy or from the brothers, there’s always two sides to a story.
Yvonne seeing a personal therapist once or twice a month for you is key. Do not take the stories you hear in your show for granted. Traumas never choose or segregate or spare anyone. One day you will remember me for this. I care about you.
Vicarious Trauma!
@@jaeljeremano1151 True my professional colleague. Thanks
Your kid is more important than the grades
some dont get this!
The enemy tainted his mind, secluded him and whispered to him continually. This was a spiritual battle 😢
The enemy was the mother who kept lying to the son.
I beg to differ. I went through the same thing and thoughts as the son. My siblings were favored because they were bright with being bought whatever they wanted. This was not the same for me. I was beaten, and not the other two. I became suicidal while in class seven and even crafted a letter. Somehow I shaked it off, accepted the situation and decided to keep quiet and do my thing. I used to cry everyday but what kept me going is the fact that at the end of it all I will finalize school and be away from them. Hee, it wasn't easy but here I am. My two siblings still have access to opportunities I wished I had and are given resources. But this does not affect me anymore. I mind my business and focus on working on me, which I am proud off. Funny thing, my parents still somehow do not know about this. For the longest I despised my mother since the mistreatment was worse from her. Stop blaming the ENEMY bana. Its you parents who are the cause. I still cry to date and the trauma is worse, I no longer go home.
And it's called , clinical depression...Needs very alert parents not the traditional upbringing...
You did your best as a father, but it seems like your son had a silent spiritual fight since young age. I'm sorry that he ended his life untimely.
This was indeed a spiritual war. I don't see anything wrong these parents did that could push the child to suicide. This was so spiritual
For the first time, watching a story about someone i know. Steve, continue resting in peace ❤❤.
Actually the son was our friend I and my sister,rest easy biko
Saw a part of this interview in Tiktok and ran here 🥺🥺 For sure mental health is a big concern esp among yourhs😢. I wish we understand this as youths,before venturing into parenthood🤲🤲
Mental health is a disease like any other, it is not the spirits, its not the parent or spouse's fault. It is a disease like any other. you did your best according to what you knew then. Don't beat yourself up. You did a good job raising them all.
Very true
Very true... I feel sad seeing people turn this to a 'spiritual battle'...We have a long way as a society in regards to mental awareness....
Mental illness*
@@zawadijuliet6311it is also a spiritual matter...
This story is so touching,may you find peace wherever you're...
Thank you for watching
Toxicity in marriages is one absurd thing in parenting in either motherhood /fatherhood.
True, words like Stupid, comparing the kid's
Listening to you, I feel like I am the boy you are talking about, I grew up knowing that am a burden to my dad, he called a family meeting one day and said he is done with me, I hated marriage I hated him, in Form 1 I swore never to get married coz I never wanted to have a child and name him after my dad, Am in my 30's now, I visit home, I pretend all is all well but I know deep down something changed along time ago,
seek therapy and counseling, and believe in hope and triumph. Do not let your parent's treatment destroy your life. They have lived theirs, and most did not know what love is. Set a new better pattern for you and your generation. If possible tell them wether they agree or not it will free your heart
Hugs. Please start your healing journey
I am very sorry for this parent. From the narration, it seems that your child had an underlying mental health condition that had not been diagnosed. Unfortunately such children suffer a lot of abuse and discrimination due to a fault that is not theirs. You tried to give the best and his death was not your fault.
Thank you so much for saying this. It is such a painful thing for a parent as they keep wondering what more they could have done to avoid this kind of outcome. Thanks for the kind words. George Chacha wants people to learn through his experience.
This was not a mental problem, from the narration, they never showed him love. I hate those family parliament in my life, it makes some children feel bad. They must be using harsh words towards the boy especially the father
All I can tell parents is to pray, pray and pray.
Hi kawera thiz story Haz rily touched me Mimi wazazi wangu wameishi kunichukia from class seven til date I am mentally sick they even hate my kids nawanaishi nao juu Niko kazi uku I feel like my kids are not ok coz I every day dream of my kids getting lost plz I jus need a counsellor staki kuacha watoi wangu 😓😓
I'm so sorry. I can tell you're in pain. Pole sana and I hope you find healing through all this.
May you find help dear, I pray it shall be well
It shall be well dear just keep on praying for them then save vizuri ukihome take your kids and start a new life with them
Speak it out..talk to someone out if your fruendsand family zone.may you get help you are searching for.Hugs 🫂
God is close to the broken hearted. Call unto him
FROM REVIVAL RESTORED TV
I know that one of the hardest news to accept😪😪 is when the doctors tell you that there is nothing left to do, there are only two options: sleeping until the body collapses or be given morphine to ease the pains.If you are in such situation or know someone who is in that situation be encouraged by Isaiah 43:2-3...God will give you victory and nullify the doctor's report because there is nothing that is impossible with Him.
Regards,
REVIVAL RESTORED TV.
This is what I had gone through as the only daugter to my parents but I thank God for His guidance over my life!
Only in Christ can you find refuge, and he is well able to erase any guilt and regrets. You did all you could, this is a spiritual battle,so relatable, Thanks so much for such encouragement. May you find comfort in God alone.
True he needed cancelling and prayers
That boy was the star of the family and thats why the devil was after destroying his life since his younger age. May GOD give you peace
God is transforming your pain into purpose. May God heal you.
I lived exactly the life of the son(who died) of this man but I persevered so much. Talk about verbal insults, gossip, loneliness, isolation, many thoughts amongst others. This man had no idea that his son had issues and was slowly dieing from inside. His son once said that 'i will never marry'. It is because he didn't see value in a woman.
Kawira I like watching your interviews ❤ This was so deep, my take home. Punishment is not correction, " be a friend to your kids, learn to talk and have conversations with your children".
❤❤❤ thanks so much for the lovely message. It keeps me going.
This story is so inspiring,parenthood has no formular,it's only God's grace and guidance 🙏🙏🙏🙏
It's very sad listening to this knowing the boy is no more. We shld learn from the Dad it's very healthy to know what mental health really looks like
Dear Mr. Don't blame yourself because you did your best. I this life we face so many challenges even out your hand. I pray that the family will heal.
This story is similar to my son's. He is now at a mental.health hospital. A honestly true comparison with my son who is now 30 years old
There are kids who are just born with mental illness. I think as a parent if you try your best you should count as having done your work. Even if he was not pushed to get his potential out, he would now be living a very bitter life claiming you have all along hated him and are responsible for how his life turned out. It is really being between a hard place and a rock for the parent. Sorry Mr. George but you did well while still struggling yourself.
True it was in his mind
He was such a sweet man,may you have peace.
Very sad insightful story. My 17 year old son told me with a lot of bitterness that one of the most painful thing he has carried, was that we refused to buy him a gun in village market which he had preferred to the swings. I assumed the gun was 150 and the game was 50 bop…am sure we reasoned out budget with him but his mind could not fathom. Am imagining if we had many of those incidents…the devil would have come in and played his mind
It hurts deeper when you are in the same shoes going through the same for decades , unfortunately you have people who in dire need of your strong positive part/ Personality, so as much as death was a remedy that came in handy for him,it can't be the option here but worst is struggling to be alive for the innocent ones.Though the good thing is am alive to read, listen and hear what should be the way forward. Thank you very much for sharing. It has served a wake up call before it's too late.
Parents please be the best friends, confidant and guards to your children.
May the dad find peace .
All my life since i was young that how i felt till today always felt my parents never love me am just pushing myself to stay alive and pushing the suicide thought away from my mind and stay strong and give my son the love that i never felt from my parent
Erase what your parents did to you by telling them even if they will not accept - it's likely. you are a different individual from them now . create relationships with other loving, kind people in church or social cycles you are a favored child of God
@@ednahchirchir1924 thanks for you kind words
Such a sweet soul who had to go through so much trauma.may God give parents all the wisdom to deal with different personalities in their children
But why let the big boy do house chores like washing dishes, cleaning the house, washing your clothes and that of his mum....i think you as parents really made the boy suffered he was a growing man for heaven sake
But those are normal life skills
@@judithadhiambo4351those are skills everyone should learn
@judithadhiambo4351 nop, they're not. There duties suitable for boys and those suitable for girls. Duties should be gender sensitive, especially when a child is growing...Nature of duty can affect self esteem, either positively or negatively.
In this day and age, both men and women need to know these life skills
We have male chefs, male housekeepers in hotels.
He was doing too many house chores despite consistent complains to the parents? Culturally Kenyans love to make their children do their responsibilities. So incase the child get some depression, these chores pushes the child to the edge. I am so sorry for your lose. Thank you for sharing.
Doing so many house chores is an escape...... When I am not in a good mental space I clean anything and everything....For me it acts as a symptom that I am not doing ok. It helps me catch myself.
@@faithodero2706Hello namesake?.
Good to hear that you understand the patterns in your case. I think I didferent things depending on the triggers e.g. cleaning, eating and shoping incase I have money.
I am at the stage of empty nest and the mental struggles are different.
Our children need alot of prayers we can't read their minds or blame anyone 😢
One thing that I have learnt it's normalizing saying sorry to my children then their tell me about there feelings
Yvonne great interview this gentleman is very wise. 😊
Thank you so much for watching.
I agree with you. He is such an amazing gentleman full of wisdom.
This is a very strong message. Thank you sir. May God comfort you and your family, bind up your broken hearts, and bless you with true inner healing. I pray that you find grace to forgive yourself and everyone else who was around your dear son. Shalom
Thanks for your kind words 😊.
Most middle children feel there are not loved 💔
I can prove this...am third born but vitu kwa ground Ni different...I have 6yrs bila kwenda home but everything will be okey God is there for us
😪😪right..
I felt so 😢I felt like my mother hated me so much , now that I am a mother myself , I know that parents loves all their children .
This is wat my big sister feels as a second born
Even in psychology,a middle child is called a hustler. It's very true
He shouldn't blame himself, he tried all that he could 4 the boy but he was already gone. The devil convinced him that he was unloved & he believed.
I think when he said his son expressed to him and the mom that he hated his childhood and he felt hurt by them they should have rather apologised and tried to work with him and listened to him , rather than just tell him he's the most loved child, it seems like a way of dismissing his feelings, then him calling for a meeting but its just for telling them what they have done wrong , I feel like from this story it was more of the dad telling the kids what to do always
Yes! This is exactly it. His experience was never validated and that crushed his soul.
Our military parents are always there for instructions but they come to learn as we grow
Great message 👏👏 infact it's yesterday that I came across a quote that says, as fathers, get close and have time for your son or sons. By doing so, you always reduce about 80% of him getting depression as he grow up. He will grow upnwith great virtues.
I missed a part if he could have involved fellow brother to council out their brother too and keep cross watch of him too
Sorry George for the loss, i relate with your story i have a so with mental health and all the characteristics you said i see here, though he is on medication. They really have mood swings and sit alone with no company. Being a single mum its even hard. And most of this persons with mental health are very bright. It is well it is well 🙏🙏🙏. Rest in perfect peace 🕊️🕊️🕊️🕊️
Between the ages a child starts walking and talking to 16 years, don’t yell, scream, punish or insult them. It’s the they grasp and store information permanently. Choose your words wisely
This is really scary. My 14 year old daughter is exhibiting similar signs. I know it has a lot to do with her childhood..she witnessed me and her dad arguing since she was very young. He was an alcoholic, so there was always something to argue about. I'm thankful that this wonderful man has shared his story. I'll keep pushing my daughter to get therapy, even though she keeps saying she's okay.
Thanks, don't become a statistic like many of us. Learn from us ☺️
Better children who grow up with divorced parents than living with parents who fight everyday.
@@familytherapypod you're right. Its very challenging, raising her alone in America while trying to navigate the issues she's dealing with. I just pray for God's grace
Also take her to church and let her join youth services
Mercy seek therapy for your child.Remember there are school counselors.Start from there.Don't assume!
So touching story. Thank you for educating us through your own pain.
Thanks, I'm humbled.
Don't blame yourself sir! Pls dont may you find peace in your life Amen
My daughter is just 12year old but she is something else l used to beat her thinking she can change but nothing changed in her she has no respect imagine 12years old its so painful l left her l came to hustle away from home so she is staying at our home with my dad and my sister but she doesn't respect both of them she can talk back at them my God am in tears everyday new story about her but l left her in Gods hands l even don't know what to do 😭😭😭 and she hates her sister so much l even don't know why all this is happening and she likes moving she cant stay in one place
😢😢 I don't know why I had to watch this, unfortunately my brother committed suicide 8th August 2023 ,he also felt like we never understood him.may they rip. How I wish my brother opened up to someone
Sorry to this guy for paying the utimate price. Hope he can heal. Most parents will usually casually pick favourites and expect the least favourite to suck it up. I confronted my parents about it and blocked them for a while saa hii nkikohoa wanaitika. They were actually very surprised coz they dint expect it. I confronted my father as a 32yr old for his sexual abuse when we were young and that how he developed diabetes. Sifurahii kugonjeka kwake but hey i needed my closure!😔
But George you have this ideology I love the most in life ,little of myself in you,thank you for being here to share I believe someone really hears this
Have never felt like I had a parent figure in my entire life....not because they're dead or something,they're much ok with the fact that there's no bond between as....to my perspective, the best gift you can give to your children is your availability....that's when they get to open up on what they are going thru
In mental health there's something we call,adverse childhood events (ACEs) and if not dealt with by a psychologist could lead to a mental melt down.
It hurts deeper when you are in the same shoes going through the same for decades , unfortunately you have people who are in dire need of your strong positive part/ Personality, so as much as death was a remedy that came in handy for him,it can't be the option here but worst is struggling to be alive for the innocent ones.Though the good thing is am alive to read, listen and hear wchat should be the way forward. Thank you very much for sharing. It has served a wake up call before it's too late.
Parents please be the best friends, confidant and guards to your children.
NAJUA alot of you will not agree with me but l agree with EV. EZEKIELs teaching about everything about us should be connected to the alter of GOD nobody knows better how to raise CHILDREN we can think we are doing it right by giving them Everthing but nooo only GOD can take good care of them soo let's involve GOD More in our jobs, marriage, children,relationship, business l mean everything. may GOD heal every heart that is bleeding GOD'S GRACE BE UPON ALL OF US AMEN
I agree with you. We can't do it by ourselves. Sometimes, we think we've got it all figured out when we don't. I pray that God gives us wisdom to raise our kids
Life is spiritual mahali wazazi tunakosea tunaona tu physical pole sana
From grade 3 oh my God . Thank you for sharing sir healing for you and your family be your portion in Jesus name
Vyonne this is the best interview I have come across. Big big lesson to be learnt.
I recall reading a book by a famous Novel Writer, Daniele steel about her son battling mental health issues and how he took them for a ride as a family. They couldn't understand, why, and regardless of doing what any parent does for the betterment of their children, he ended committing suicide. 'The story of Nick Traina' made me realize mental health challenges can begin from any age and at times from the mum's womb. Your did the best you could have done.
This is so inspiring 😊😊😊thank you for the wisdom. Mental health is very important I have really learned a lot . Thank you Yvonne for hosting this wise man
I don't want to coment juu weee mine was more than this but I thank God am still alive
Sad...we understand sir. Your sincerity and pain and love are obvious...
How I wish this was done in kiswahili our parents need to understand this
According to counselling psychology, thats my field. We say that "we are the product of the environment" we are what we are because of how we were raised. Trauma is a very dangerous aspect in ones life,depression is real,bipolar,schizophrenia and other mental health related problems are actually in our society,we face these victims in our daily lives but without our concerns and knowledge about mental health issues we will think that it is okay,yet it is okay not to be okay. Theres no health without mental health
Pl
Pl
Hi dear how can I contact you please ??
I have the same case with my son,I don’t know where i went wrong,he’s always complaining about life,he always feels like i don’t love him,am a single mother and have raised him alone since day 1 without father figure up to now,sometimes he can force me to buy something i can’t afford,moods swings in him is everytime,like now he has never talked to me for 4 days
May you find peace George .
I think your son was clinically depressed for many years considering it started at a young age (grade 4). I wish the psychiatrist did more to help him. He should have at least recommended therapy.
Quite sad that you lost him😢
Praying for your comfort❤
In my opinion he needed psychologist for atleast therapy session that could accessed the all mental status exam
I am 21 years old and I have struggled with suicidal though since I was like 7 years old because of how my childhood was. It is very sad for me sometimes I just pity my family. sad that they made my life terrible. but I have been doing really bad and I attempted suicide in high school. but I am trying to adapt and get over the trauma now that I am in University. It hard sometimes to get over we went through. I am sorry he lost the battle but he worn it in his own way. I will hold on till whenever.
You are amazing, you are loved,keep holding on❤
❤❤❤❤
You are on this world for a purpose God loves you so much,trust me,one day you will be the happiest lady in this planet.
God made you with a purpose. Follow your passion and seek therapy or talk to someone you trust. Also, pray always, and if you can, cry in secret to God or when you feel like it. Tears release stress
Hugs hugs hugs 🫂🫂🫂
Pole sana for the loss of your son, and all that you've gone thru, may God jeal you. Praying for the Mum too, its not easy to burry a child.
Ohh good Lord so sorry for your lose,may the Lord give you and your family peace and comfort. You did all you knew to do at the time to help your son,forgive yourself maybe for the thinks you feel you could have done better sir.We all want the best for our children.
May his soul rest in paradise.....as a parent i have learnt alot from this real life experience....its soo painful to realize all you could have done when its too late...thats why i work soo hard to provide to my level best as a mom and a father as well.....To my kid's,,,i love you unconditional to the galaxy and back...❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Which paradise ?
@@helenashikongo3622 The one you know,that am not aware....
Very informative. The best in tuko
Please the interview the mother too . I feel like their is something missing here. Sorry for your lose sir .
May God give peace to this family. Rest in peace young man.
My sister had similar characteristics unfortunately she passed on this year. Its sad it hurt.
Sad story but this happens to this sensitive kind hearted people I pray God protect our children
Pole Sana those 3 boys are very close friends to me .Judas,biko,and issa,we are even neighbors at moi air base.
Hi.... I only knew Juda through Biko back in campus. Please check up on the two brothers. I hope they are holding up and not affected mentally.
Personally, I would rather die than repeat my life from birth to high school.
I started living when I became independent and that’s after graduating from college
And please, don’t blame yourself for what happened to your son…you cared enough to force him to work hard. I’m sure you’d still be blaming yourself if you withheld discipline and your son failed to complete studies and became a family liability.
This is what I think, your unhealthy relationship with your wife negatively affected your children and more to the one who committed suicide.
I can’t sit back and let my child do whatever they want; they need guidance and sometimes it’ll mean chastising them
Have the same feeling
Pole sana for the loss of your son. Many lessons for a parent to learn, thank you for sharing
The comments show just how little most people know, or understand about mental illness. Before compliance, obedience, success, and other measures of success, seek wellness in your kids. Pray for your kids, but don't forget to ACT, consistently.
People die from depression, they don't just off themselves.
Very good advice
😭😭😭 I very relate, I wish this interview was in french so that my parents could understand. Thanks Sir
I felt the same feeling like this son of yours but I blame no one. Umenisaindia kindogo
Thank you so much for this beautiful message
The story resemble like mine batlteling mental health and depression the problem is that no one try to understand us I thank God am trying to over come this
My son is going through everything you have said anaamini ana chukiwa expicially the dad
He was abused by the parents in the name of discipline....not sure where physical abuse came from...... But so sorry for the dad, only God can heal
Only God can heal. Thank you so much for watching May Wahito. It's nice to see you here girl. ❤❤❤
That's true
Disciplinarians can really push their children to the edge.
He was abused
So painful story may the Lord give you strength
He was made to go that way no matter what you could have done,,, nothing could have changed ❤
This was a very good interview well done Yvonne❤
Thank you so much for watching
The "verbal diarrhea" was the boy expressing his pain. Pain sometimes will not be expressed in a clam way. Of course someone will be angry, they will cry, they will isolate, drugs e.t.c their justice was denied and they realize this! And as the parent, of course hearing words like " you never loved me" will hurt. You need to resist DENYING the child's reality to protect yourself from feeling the pain of DISSAPOINTING your child! You are postponing problems. Listen to what your child is saying! Don't justify with bible verses and whatever philosophical knowledge you have, your child is not in some stoic or religious class. Justifications is what draws the child further away because it shows you're not interested in listening, to understand them. Walk the path of healing with your child and do not expect them to embrace you fully as if history never happened, create a new chapter.
Very painful story so touching may God grant you happiness again