i thought the video was "Do all lesbians look the same?" and i got so concerned like i activated flight or fight mode and clicked that notification at the speed of light i promise you
so when are yall going to stop including very obviously bepenised ppl on panels/groups meant for women? or is lesbian erasure a past time for ur staff?
The girl feeling ashamed for having accepting parents actually made me cry because in reality that’s what we all deserve as queer people. It’s kinda depressing that even those who are embraced by their family can’t fully feel their joy because it carries a certain guilt with it.
I think it wasn't a shame, it was a hesitation to say that in front of other who had difficult experience with the same topic... You know, in the sense how we don't like to brag about the shiny things we have in life in front of lesser privileged people...
My parents have always been fully accepting of me being gay and I’ve thanked my mom for it countless times that’s it’s a non issue to her but everytime I do though she’s like; it’s just normal to me, why wouldn’t I accept it? She really doesn’t get how parents can not accept it but yeah I definitely have gay friends with parents who don’t
I can totally see that. My dad is awful to me about it but my mom is accepting. So I've dealt with both sides of that coin. I love that my mom accepts me and treats me no differently, and I wish everyone could be that way.
The gay privilege question got me thinking that a really cool middle ground episode would be "Lesbians vs Gay men", exploring the intersections of homophobia and sexism
I in large part agree, but imo gay men are just more victimized by society. I say this as a trans woman who has been harassed, and often misunderstood by my family when talking about my female partners. It's just very odd to see people conflating fetishization and dismissive attitudes to actual violence and threats of violence.
@@kaeyaseyepatch2363 There's a reason the year is 2023 , even if you go by evolution and randomness theory ... you're still in the red for it wouldn't be evolutionary to be homosexual thus cutting your own argument or sexuality
the first question responses stood out, i wish we would talk more about the privilege of growing up around other queer people versus being the only one in a small town and how it can effect people
Is that the only reason for those answers being different though? Even when I didn't have queer friends I never crushed on a straight person because heterosexuality is unattractive to me as a queer person and if someone is straight I automatically find them unattractive. I can't relate to or understand crushing on a straight girl.
@@jijitters I’m bi and I had a crush on my straight best friend as a kid before I even realized what it was. After coming to terms with my sexuality, I was less likely to fall for a straight girl, but it’s definitely different for everyone! You can’t help who you end up liking, even if you know they wouldn’t want to be with you. There’s no shame in it, obviously as long as you keep the crush to yourself and respect their sexuality and boundaries
To all the goldstar lesbians out there IF a guy ever tells you "Well how do you know if you haven't tried it with a guy" then reply "Well how do you know you aren't gay if you have never tried it with a guy?" Watch them be quiet.
I mean they are though, men and women are different down to the cells in their bodies. We are a sexually dimorphic species, by definition there are differences between the sexes.
@@PROVOCATEURSK Simple answer to what, you homophobe and misogynist? 😑Your response was just an empty phrase, an answer to a question nobody asked... 🥱
@@davidmarwood775 that difference still doesnt mean that women don't know what we want. Same way men can know what they're attracted to without having sex, same goes for women. We know what attracts us and what doesn't
@@kid-ava Why would they come and say ''all of them'' when the person specifically mentioned only floral skirt? Imagine someone says ''you're a pretty woman'' and another jumps and says ''actually ALL women''.
Maxine is such a soft spoken and seemingly kind person, even when she was talking about her father. I think most of us who grew up in a fanatically religious househould can kinda relate and the fact that she was acting so mature and understanding towards others experience, is honestly really respectable. English is my 4th language so i might have made some mistakes in my comment, feel free to correct me
Thanks everyone haha. Its easier for me cuz i grew up on learning them all ever since i was a child, but I believe everyone can do it with enough passion and effort. It is harder the older u get but dont give up
The first girl I fell in love with was straight but I was 15 at the time. After that it never happened again thankfully. I've been with my lesbian soulmate for 19 years! ❤️
@@oop4841 I don't think it's creepy at all. It's actually pretty normal. What is creepy is what you do afterwards. I've also fallen for a straight friend, asked her on a date lol, got rejected and then moved on (after crying for a few months boohoo). We are still as close as we were ten years ago.
the whole “i had a vision of what your life was gonna turn out to be” is crazy and so harmful but so normalized. i hope moving forward parents in the future parents allow the kids they have to live the life they want to live, not based on a fantasy of the parents.
I think it’s completely natural to have hopes and dreams for your child. What makes it harmful is when you those hopes & dreams turn into direct expectations
Well I mean its beyond normal and fine for anyone with children to imagine their future. Every person who has had and will have kids will. It's an exciting thing. It's more about not letting those thoughts become the only possible outcomes for that child. Allowing their kid to carve out their own path and letting your child's interests and experiences shape your thoughts.
@@PROVOCATEURSKhate is a choice. you cant change who you are, but you can change yourself to be more accepting. it can be difficult especially if you have grown up in a hateful family, but it is not impossible
as parents going forward, i feel like there needs to be this preparation for anything, for your child to be gay, trans, lesbian or whatever it may be. instead of having your own idea of what your child should be and have expectations that could change at any given moment.
exaclty parents get caught up in the idea of pushing their children into what they wanted to be, or what they want for them. They see them as another version of themselves, instead of their own person.
exaclty parents get caught up in the idea of pushing their children into what they wanted to be, or what they want for them. They see them as another version of themselves, instead of their own person.
You should have an idea of what you want your child to grow up like that’s how you lay framework and foundations, what you shouldn’t do is to force things on to your child. Being to forceful is just being a tyrant and being too free and open minded is just neglecting your duty as a parent 🌚 life is all about moderation young grasshopper
The problem is that if you take that approach, then society is going to dictate what your kids should be like. Your comment bothers me because you are surrendering your role as a parent and giving that control over to society and social media.
I'm confused at 6:40 when Taryn says she wouldn't consider herself fully lesbian, why Jubilee cast her? No shade to bi or pan folks at all, but those are different identities, and this episode is specifically about lesbians.
Interestingly I don't think I can recall any videos Jubilee has done exclusively about gay men having bi and pan men as well. I could be wrong but it is interesting the difference in Jubilee when it comes to this.
I was looking for this comment. It really does invalidate the lesbian community. Both by what she is doing and by what jubilee is doing. But perhaps jubilee wasn't even aware. Since she has never been with men I can see why she would want to identify as a lesbian but if she still is attracted to men it sounds more like bisexuality with a strong preference for women.
@@h.g.warrender5529 A lesbian is a homosexual female. Perhaps the male is bisexual, but by their own admission they have only slept with females. I have no reason to believe they are not heterosexual, in other words...straight.
@@ijustwannabehappier-v4973 hate to burst your bubble but there is a gay men episode of spectrum and it was 9 minutes long. This is actually on the longer side of spectrum videos.
I’m still shocked about the first question. I thought it was a universal gay experience to fall for a straight person at some point. Maybe not your best friend, but in school having a crush on a straight classmate is so common! But they mostly had gay friends? DAMN They don’t realise how lucky that is!
Yeah I've never fallen for straight friends because I already know they're off limits, but like, random girls I didn't know well who turned out to be straight? Absolutely.
I'm also a lesbian and I had like 50/50 friends? But what happens at least to me is that when I hear that a girl is straight my brain kind of blocked them out? Idk is weird but I never liked any straight friends
For the prompt "I have damaged relationships with loved ones because of my sexuality" - I don't like that phrasing, it implies the blame is on the women for being lesbians when any damage is really due to their loved one's inability to accept their sexuality. It's the loved one's reactions causing damage, not being lesbian.
Like Leonidas said, I read it as "I have [damaged relationships (relationships that are damaged)] with loved ones because of my sexuality" not "[I have damaged] relationships with loved ones because of my sexuality" but yeah they could've chosen a less interpretive phrase
As a lesbian, lesbianism is truly the best thing that happened to me, yes I’ve lost my parents and closed one bcuz of it but I cannot imagine a different life. Lesbianism is a blessing. Loved the video, let’s goooo lesbians
She identifies as lesbian, so she is, therefore, lesbian, to be expressive about some of your attractions doesn’t guarantee that that person feels like they identify as for example, bisexual or pansexual.
@@adrianghandtchi1562 No, The person above was correct. A lesbian is a woman exclusively attracted to other women. You can't just identify as a lesbian and change the whole definition because you want to.
@@adrianghandtchi1562 So with this logic, men who are attracted to women can be considered a lesbian then? Stop trying to change the definition of something just because you wanna be included. It will NEVER happen. Being a lesbian means being a woman STRICTLY romantically and physically attracted to women. Period. Let it be that way.
@@Amelia-VYeah I understand if you are around lesbian a lot and mostly like girls and watch lesbian movies etc. why you might casually call yourself lesbian without thinking but to go on a video and talk about the perspective of a lesbian is weird.
The fact that a parent could just stop talking to their own child is so heartbreaking to me. Like at the end of the day, regardless of what your beliefs are, that’s your CHILD.
its not heartbreaking to me anymore. Its called life. Its young people who make their on choices. Some have problems and some maybe not. I dont feel sympathy for a majority. Its sad sure. Think about the killers, and 304. And their family abandon them... Thats there choice. Shame is low... Thats why I guess so many woman think OF is okay.
Maybe bc men who prefer men but do find themselves attracted to a woman now and then are still called gay. Socially, sexuality comes with stigma like a one drop rule.
i can honestly relate to their experiences with religion, knowing your own parent would choose their religion over you is one of the most hurtful things to experience. i love my religion but it's also destroyed embracing the part of me being queer.
@@hustler212 Religion aint the worst. Its plenty of non religious people who dont get down with lgbtq. Just saying, if you think religion is the biggest problem. Ill give you an example from me. Religion or not I'd not except an OF worker. Some people are the same way with LGBTQ. Cause its can change like feminism did 😂.
If you're attracted to men, you're not a lesbian. I can get people who have had experiences with men in the past or thought they had attraction to men and didn't and don't feel attracted to men anymore, but anyone who is attracted to men is not a lesbian. The lesbian label is characterized by a lack of attraction to men. It's incredibly misogynistic and lesbophobic that people keep trying to redefine the only sexuality that doesn't include men to include them. It's gross.
yeah fr there's only one label for non-men who are not attracted to men but plenty of other labels you could use if you like men (bi, pan, sapphic, etc) why can't lesbians have one thing :(
@@TryingtoTellYou Why is is such a difficult concept lol? Why is it ridiculous that many people get to reap the benefits of both sexualities? In some species, most of their population is bi. And in humans, bisexuality is more common than homosexuality…
@@TryingtoTellYou It just is more common lol. Read a census. I dont get ur explanation at all. I assume that 2 refers to bisexuality but idk what 1 is. Asexuality? Second, wdym how much it is “meant to have.”
@@Zeta523 The human body has a blueprint. Anything that falls outside the blueprint is a mutation and was not meant to happen. Asexuality is no different. You have a deformed part of your brain that is not according to the human blueprint. Bisexuality, as I'll explain for the second time, suggests that the brain has evolved such that it may lust for both sexes, which is frankly inhuman.
Going back to the gay male privilege thing, I feel like there’s a nuance there. Like gay men are more validated than gay women are, but also historically speaking when things like diseases enter our community, gay men and trans women are way more affected. Also I feel like we tend to get hate-crimed more. Again under hetero-patriarchy, we all suffer, but I don’t necessarily think one of us has privilege over the other when it comes to our sexuality
True. And that mostly comes from transmisogyny, which directly affects trans women. It ain't oppression olympics, anyway. The two groups are oppressed regarding their sexuality and when it comes to gender, lesbians may experience misogyny and gay men, especially femme ones, may endure the discrimination that derives from transmisogyny. Though there are still white cis gay men who are masculine and may go through their lives being deemed as appropriate Men. That's it
Can you explain how are gay males more validated? Bc I have a hard time believing if that’s entirely true. There’s TH-cam videos made by childish high schoolers asking everyone if they would rather have two gay dads or two gay moms and most of them said two gay moms. It shows that lesbian relationships is more acceptable and validated than two gay male parent relationships.
Lets not tell people what they are or erase their sexualities, thats literally what the bisexual community has been fighting to avoid for years since it happens to them. Dont be that person
@@sofiabruiz17Not when they literally come out to admit their attraction to the opposite sex and then say they are lesbian because they are with a female. It is like when I said I was straight, and I am bi-erasing myself.
as i answered in another commet: stop labeling everyone as bisexual or fluid having had sex with people of your opposite sex in the past, or not being 100% into people of your same sex (of course that doesn't mean 50%, but maybe to be 90% into people of your same sex) doesn't make you bisexual bisexuality exists, but don't abuse and overuse that word
honestly it is screaming bi and pan phobia that girl that said that she isn't a "full" lesbian cuz she is still attracted to men... like honey you r not even a lesbian
My problem with the label “scissoring”, is that they try so hard to separate lesbians from the word sex. Like it’s just sex, who cares how they do it? It’s sex 😭
I hear you. MY issue with it is that “scissoring” makes it seem like the only position for them to do to achieve the kind of effect that scissoring would have. “Tribbing” or even simply “grinding” would be better. You can do that in doggie, cowgirl, missionary, etc. “Scissoring” makes it seem so limited.
I was hoping to see someone on that last question disagree because their sexuality didn’t damage the relationship; the other person’s inability to love them for who they are is what damaged it.
It's astonishing that they fell back and stood grouped together on their respective lines instead of just maintaining the default distances. I was not expecting that and don't know why every other group would only move laterally. It was so much easier on the camera, to frame everyone and to not have them turning around for the entire time or only staring at someone's back. Wow.
It makes me think since they've never done it before like this, that they asked the contestants to do it this time. I agree, it makes it easier to watch the screen.
I agree with Jenny’s answer to the ‘gay men are more privileged than lesbians’ because living in a Mexican house hold my mom and I watch gay men relationships on TV and my mom never says anything bad or wrong about them. She even know a mlm relationship in real life! But when a lesbian couple is shown of TV she makes a bad comment about the lesbian couple. So before hearing Jenny’s experience, I never knew other Mexicans who are lesbians had similar experiences.
Lol in Italy they hate both, it's a very "Men pov" society , and idk how to describe It but for lesbians Is like "you are kind of acceptable but i don't belive you"
@@missmaam2662 I think that’s like the reverse of lesbians being fetishized by men while discriminating gay men. Sometimes women will do the same thing where they fetishize gay men (look at boys love genre) but are uncomfortable around lesbians and a big reason is they might be attracted to them.
11:48 I wanna give this girl a hug! My dad is a bishop in the mormon church. I feel her emotions so strongly while she speaks about her family. In the church you are told family is the most important thing. When they find out this type of information they develop this disconnect with you. So much love for people who have to endure religious trauma♥️
Being raised in a strict Catholic household, I was told many times I was going, "To burn in eternal hellfire." Not okay to hear that as a teenager. Religious and familial shame is the worst, takes many years to overcome (and a lot of $ for counseling).
The gay privilege question is so interesting, because I feel like it’s different societally vs socially. Societally and historically it’s easier to be a queer woman because we aren’t paid as much attention and thus avoid some of the harsher persecution gay men have faced, meanwhile societally being ignored is actually the issue queer women face because we’re invalidated and given less space in society (an example being that there’s literally one lesbian bar in all of LA that just opened last week, meanwhile there are dozens of gay bars in WeHo)
Actually I would disagree with the “societally” statement. I think that’s a privilege for for fem lesbians but when a masc lesbian is in public they get harassed. They can’t even go to the bathroom without someone telling them to get out or even calling the cops on them. I think it really depends. Like I know that masculine gay men might not be hated in the same context as feminine gay men when they are out and about just like fem lesbians and mascs
This reminds me of the difference between male and female queerness in football/soccer. For the men it's mostly taboo to the point they get pretend-girlfriends while the women are almost expected to be queer - but of course they still have to deal with misogyny anyway.
The last question and answers had me especially emotional. I hope they all know it’s not them and their sexuality that has damaged their relationships, but rather the intolerance and hate on the other end of those relationships.
All the reasons they said arguing that lesbians are more privileged than gay men were signs of misogyny. It's not a "privilege" to be "accepted" only when you're sexualized.
The gay men question has so many levels. On one hand, they are generally more accepted into society as who they are. On the other hand, they face a lot of stereotypes and a bunch of other issues that lesbians generally don't (or at least not to the same extent). Its a really hard question, because all identities face their own challenges.
Exactly. They’re treated very differently. No, lesbians aren’t taken as seriously. It’s frustrating. We’re also fetishized by straight men, which is annoying, but can even be dangerous. Some men even feel threatened that women can enjoy sex without them involved. I would say on the other hand, when society lashes out at the community, gay men face more of that backlash. People who are against the community see gay men as a bigger “threat” so gay men are put under a microscope. The current societal backlash is targeting Trans people, particularly trans women, and gay men far more than it’s targeting lesbians.
@@ccrans1216 gay men ? Lol probably trans people . Most of the hate videos I've come across this days are about trans people seems even being gay is much more acceptable than being transgender.
I also feel gay men being accepted depends on the region . I will probably say in most part of Asia for example gay men are far more accepted Maybe because of the bl genre that straight women consume or love .
@@Imetwurld_that's not necessarily true since gay rights and gay marriage is only legally recognised in taiwan in all of asia, as an asian i know the homophobia is far worse here esp from the family since conservative families believe that the son carries on the family name and what not and filicide is a reality we have to face
sexuality is seen as a spectrum or at least more complicated than just being one thing. someone can admit they have had or have the capabilities of being attracted to men and still be a lesbian because on the scale they fall way on the “lesbian” side. honestly it’s also about what label feels best and more comfortable for you
Yes, they can be This is why she mentioned the Kinsey scale. You can be anywhere on this scale Gay------Bi------Straight If you’re leaning much to one side you are that sexuality or bi if somewhere in between
I would argue that NONE of the women here have "damaged relationships with loved ones due to their sexuality"...It's their loved ones having a stance of conditional love (as opposed to unconditional) that damaged the relationships. None of these women actually did the damage; they are just being true to themselves and that is commendable.
no one ever will damage relationships becuase of their sexuality, if the relationship is ruined is because of the other side's hatred, always remember it will never be your fault
I love Taryn but does she even consider herself to be a lesbian? She’s always said she’s attracted to men as well, even in this video. It’s kind of weird that she’s in this video.
Yes, she says herself that she doesn't identify as a lesbian and that she is still sexually attracted to men and wishes to have had sex with them, so as a bisexual she should not have been in this video of homosexual girls / women, although I like her.
"if you don't love me 100%... don't love me at all" THIS! i hope everyone can have this mentality. it's not an easy mentality to have, but it's very healthy.
13:58 It’s wonderful to know that there are people who have supportive backgrounds. To imagine a world in which no one has supportive backgrounds sounds dreadful.
GOLD STAR LESBIAN HERE…We are allowed to celebrate that because as a woman you get pressured so much to have sex with men or at least try too… so we are valid to celebrate our journey and feel proud of whatever we want. Get over it! ❤❤❤
Exactly me personally I’m bi but like why would another lesbian be upset about something a completely different person CHOOSES to use like it doesn’t affect you they’re proud let them have something omg
I will say that although I get & understand the whole concept/definition, I still get confused by it at times (past beliefs that I'm working through), but I appreciate & respect it nonetheless 😊😊, because this is unfortunately a male-centered world and that fact alone is a problem (it should be the very opposite), so I'm here for gold star lesbian women as a bisexual woman. 💜💜
@@sittinginbushes I feel that too, and it's unfortunately the fault of social conditioning, forcing these heterosexual dynamics on a lot of people. Girls and women alone are socialized to be male-focused no matter what, so it's ROUGH.
Why is a non-Lesbian on the LESBIAN episode? Why would you let someone who is attracted to men, talk about the Lesbian experience? Jubilee, you should be ashamed.
For people who haven't come out, can't come out, are questioning and/or don't have a safe space or queer people around, content like this is a blessing! BIG THANK YOU
Believe me, I'm coming from a place of love and I don't want to offend anyone. But isn't it a bit unfair to lesbians (and gay men) to put a Bisexual in videos like this? And trans for that matter, I always respected Trans but we have such different experiences, mostly regarding to sex and attraction as SEX plays a major role in monosexualities (Homosexual/Heterosexual)
@@m-ol5bh because transwomen are male so their attraction to women is straight (opposite-sex attraction) not lesbian (same-sex attraction) to be a lesbian you have to be a female attracted to females and transwomen are not female
@@m-ol5bhbecause she had different experiences than an actual cisgender woman. Her and the bisexual chick shouldn't be in this video. It's called lesbian for a reason.
I disagree. I think having a trans lesbian in this offers a unique diversity of opinion that she even acknowledged in the video! As for the bisexual women yeah… I suppose it is her prerogative to identify as lesbian instead, she has her own personal reasons I suppose
"Scissoring is a real thing" is a really weird question. Like "No, there's magical parriers keeping vaginas from touching vaginas." Is it asking that lesbians like scissoring or something? I mean, saying something you can choose to do exists doesn't mean that you do it yourself anyway.
I’ve never fallen for a straight friend. I usually never befriend someone who I could see as a partner. The only time I did was when I befriended a past crush. After becoming friends,the feelings went away.
It would depend on the person. For me even if I am attracted to someone but I can't be with them I would rather have them as a friend then not in my life at all
Such a weird thing most people do, not wanting to be friends with anyone they are interested in. Seems like toxic behavior that just about everyone has.
Getting to know someone just makes me like someone so much more It used to be more of a stranger thing but now I’ve failed for most of my close friends! None of em have been straight though (even if I thought one was but I was also like 11)
As a straight woman I was just honestly curious and clicked the video. I really like these agree/ disagree panels, it's just interesting to know everyone's perspective on things :)
(some) Straight people really do the mental most to ignore queer existence sometimes. I took an intense 8 week college class, where I was assigned a giant project with a group to present during the semester. I met with my group members once a week before it was due. We also sat next to eachother in class. I sat with and talked to my classmate for like 5 or 6 weeks about my girlfriend and after the class ended he asked me to go get coffee sometime. I was genuinely confused so I asked him directly if he meant a date and he said yes. I was like ...well I still have a girlfriend so no but thanks. I said it more politely but was there a bleep in his mind every time I said my Girlfriend to censor out that I was not available to him?? And this happens all the time I live in the south and in Texas when I say my girlfriend, people hear: my girl friend🤞😜😇 not: my Girlfriend™️😍💅🌈🖤
Heterosexuals, especially heterosexual boys and men are often so ignorant and invalidating lesbian relationships and constantly sexualize / erotisize them or harass and molest openly queer girls and women, often even aggressively flirting with them although knowing that they are already a couple when it is obviously (PDA); it is very annoying, intimidating and so disgusting. 😒
How are you a lesbian if you are attracted to guys? Doesn't that mean you are bi? Why do some women want to identify as lesbian when they are bi? I'm thinking because saying you are lesbian makes you sound more oppressed and being more oppressed gives you brownie points. That's what I'm thinking unless someone can change my mind
some bi women have a strong preference/only date women and thus feel more comfortable describing themselves as lesbian. if you say you’re bi then people automatically assume you’re open to dating both men and women, but that’s not always the case even if you experience some sort of attraction towards both genders.
I’ve been with my girlfriend for over 5 years. I’m a lesbian, but she’s technically bi. She told me when we first met that she finds men physically attractive, but she can’t connect with them emotionally. She’s so into me sometimes I forget she’s bi. Her feelings for women are a lot stronger than they are for men. She has just as much of a place here as I do. No brownie points involved.
I think it also has to do with the fact that people want to avoid biphobia. It's easier to date another queer women if you are a lesbian than when you are bi. That can be hard when your preference is women.
I was shocked to see how many lesbians said they didn’t fall for their straight best friend. I feel like if there were more millennial lesbians in here there would have been a lot more that said they fell for their straight best friend since people weren’t even out when I was in high school. There was like 3 lesbians that were out when I was in school. We really have advanced and I love that for the generations after mine.
It was beautiful seeing most of these girlies talking about growing up with a queer friend group. I grew up (and still am) basically only surrounded by straight people and that’s hard. Being the only lesbian woman in a all group is complicated because it’s genuinely complicated to relate to straight people because your all life is a POLITICAL ACT and most of us have to literally learn to love and be okay with ourselves. This video was amazing, yes for wlw representation. LET’S GO LESBIANS, LET’S GO.
Mmkay, if you're gonna have a lesbian episode, have ACTUAL women who are solely attracted to women, not a male cosplaying as a (lesbian) woman and not a bisexual woman. This is really simple!!
I really like this TH-cam channel because the people of Jubilee come up with specific topics that many people are unaware or scared to discuss. In the future, I would like to see a debate between straight and gay women. But, if there is an existing video of that, then maybe: - a debate between college graduates and college/high school dropouts
Tbh, I identify as a lesbian and honestly. I sometimes feel insecure thinking what if I'm not a lesbian? Then I have to remind myself about all the girl crushes I've had and how they made me feel and what I think I want at night and how when I like a girl I imagine holding her hand, laughing with her, kissing her, cuddling her, talking with her. Idk how I feel about sex though, I think I might be on the asexual spectrum or maybe graysexual? But I want to be in a relationship with a woman and I'm scared that just means I want to show off that I'm dating a girl and then I think how I literally wouldn't need to be in public with her to be affectionate. I've never officially had a girlfriend or kissed a girl but I wish I could have one.
Agreed! I suspect there would be different answers for older people. For instance, the parental issue is likely more accepting with the younger people. I've been out for over 35 years, and I don't know ONE story of a parent accepting their child. Newer generations have the advantage of years of more acceptance in the media, television, etc. Would love a similar video with different generations.
As a bisexual guy (who’s probably more attracted to men) I never came out per se coz my parents and friends were never particularly homophobic so they didn’t really care either way, so I never was in an environment where I thought it was important enough to come out, so my attraction to men just became obvious in a natural way. However although my family weren’t homophobic, my father was extremely abusive in other respects, particularly in regards to my autism, he was also racist and misogynistic towards my mother but he wasn’t homophobic.
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i thought the video was "Do all lesbians look the same?" and i got so concerned
like i activated flight or fight mode and clicked that notification at the speed of light i promise you
how was this comment posted one day ago but video is posted 30 mins ago?
@jubilee could you please delete the transphobic comments?
Could you please delete the transphobic comments on this video? There is a disturbing quantity at this point
so when are yall going to stop including very obviously bepenised ppl on panels/groups meant for women? or is lesbian erasure a past time for ur staff?
The girl feeling ashamed for having accepting parents actually made me cry because in reality that’s what we all deserve as queer people. It’s kinda depressing that even those who are embraced by their family can’t fully feel their joy because it carries a certain guilt with it.
I think it wasn't a shame, it was a hesitation to say that in front of other who had difficult experience with the same topic... You know, in the sense how we don't like to brag about the shiny things we have in life in front of lesser privileged people...
My parents have always been fully accepting of me being gay and I’ve thanked my mom for it countless times that’s it’s a non issue to her but everytime I do though she’s like; it’s just normal to me, why wouldn’t I accept it? She really doesn’t get how parents can not accept it but yeah I definitely have gay friends with parents who don’t
this is beautifully worded
I can totally see that. My dad is awful to me about it but my mom is accepting. So I've dealt with both sides of that coin. I love that my mom accepts me and treats me no differently, and I wish everyone could be that way.
i wish my parents were more excepting it would be so much easier
The gay privilege question got me thinking that a really cool middle ground episode would be "Lesbians vs Gay men", exploring the intersections of homophobia and sexism
I was just thinking this
YESSSSSSSS
Great idea.
I thought it was so interesting. They brought up some great points and I feel it could be explored more.
@@skyefuqyou4874 women kissing outside is fetishized by many guys... The reverse is seen as abomination 😂
I'm not sure being sexualized should be seen as a priviledge... lesbians being sexualized and gay men being hated are both acts of dehumanization
ᵀᴴᴬᴺᴷˢ ᶠᴼᴿ ᶜᴼᴹᴹᴱᴺᵀ, ᴸᴼⱽ🥰ᴱ
ᴬᴺᴰ
ˢᵁᴾᴾᴼᴿᵀ ˢᴱᴺᴰ ᴹᴱ ᴹᴱˢˢᴬᴳᴱ 📝ᵂᴵᵀᴴ ᵀᴴᴱ
ᵂᴴᴬᵀˢäᵖᵖ ᴸᴵᴺᴱ ➕¹͒³͒⁰͒⁸͒⁸͒⁹͒³͒⁶͒⁰͒⁷͒⁸͒ᴴᴱᴿᴱ ᴵ ᵂᴵᴸᴸ ᴾᵁᵀ ʸᴼᵁ ˢᵀᴱᴾ ᴬᴴᴱᴬᴰ ᴼᶠ ᴼᵀᴴᴱᴿ ˢᴵᴰᴱ ᴴᵁˢᵀᴸᴱ
ᴼᴾᴾᴼᴿᵀᵁᴺᴵᵀʸ
!!!
Yep!! Sexualization leads to violence too, just the tip of the iceberg
I in large part agree, but imo gay men are just more victimized by society. I say this as a trans woman who has been harassed, and often misunderstood by my family when talking about my female partners. It's just very odd to see people conflating fetishization and dismissive attitudes to actual violence and threats of violence.
Lesbians are sexualized because of how they put themselves out for men to watch.
i just can’t wrap my head around the fact that some parents literally abandon their child because of who they love
Religion is pretty powerful.
unfortunately the threat of eternal damnation and torture outweighs blood relations for many people
@@kaeyaseyepatch2363 There's a reason the year is 2023 , even if you go by evolution and randomness theory ... you're still in the red for it wouldn't be evolutionary to be homosexual thus cutting your own argument or sexuality
@@SpartanGnomeWhat are you talking about? I don’t get what argument you’re trying to say
@@kaeyaseyepatch2363 you don't have to be religious. There is pleeeeenty of people who are not religious and don't agree with homosexuality.
the first question responses stood out, i wish we would talk more about the privilege of growing up around other queer people versus being the only one in a small town and how it can effect people
FACTS
literally, i grew up without anyone teaching me about queer people. i thought i was incapable of love for years.
Is that the only reason for those answers being different though? Even when I didn't have queer friends I never crushed on a straight person because heterosexuality is unattractive to me as a queer person and if someone is straight I automatically find them unattractive. I can't relate to or understand crushing on a straight girl.
@@jijitters well you are different then. that doesn’t invalidate their experience
@@jijitters I’m bi and I had a crush on my straight best friend as a kid before I even realized what it was. After coming to terms with my sexuality, I was less likely to fall for a straight girl, but it’s definitely different for everyone!
You can’t help who you end up liking, even if you know they wouldn’t want to be with you. There’s no shame in it, obviously as long as you keep the crush to yourself and respect their sexuality and boundaries
To all the goldstar lesbians out there IF a guy ever tells you "Well how do you know if you haven't tried it with a guy" then reply "Well how do you know you aren't gay if you have never tried it with a guy?" Watch them be quiet.
Men and women are different, simple answer.
@@PROVOCATEURSK no
I mean they are though, men and women are different down to the cells in their bodies. We are a sexually dimorphic species, by definition there are differences between the sexes.
@@PROVOCATEURSK Simple answer to what, you homophobe and misogynist? 😑Your response was just an empty phrase, an answer to a question nobody asked... 🥱
@@davidmarwood775 that difference still doesnt mean that women don't know what we want. Same way men can know what they're attracted to without having sex, same goes for women. We know what attracts us and what doesn't
okay but the woman in the long floral skirt is GORGEOUS
They all are IMO
Agreed, love her style! 💙
@@cbryce9243 she said the woman in floral skirt. Maybe learn to respect peoples opinion?
@ijustwannabehappier-v4973 how were they disrespectful?😭
@@kid-ava Why would they come and say ''all of them'' when the person specifically mentioned only floral skirt? Imagine someone says ''you're a pretty woman'' and another jumps and says ''actually ALL women''.
Maxine is such a soft spoken and seemingly kind person, even when she was talking about her father. I think most of us who grew up in a fanatically religious househould can kinda relate and the fact that she was acting so mature and understanding towards others experience, is honestly really respectable. English is my 4th language so i might have made some mistakes in my comment, feel free to correct me
No mistake at all and your english is perfectly fine.
wooow its ur 4th langauge and its great
That's amazing that you know 4 languages i want to be just like you but unfortunately thats hard for me
Thanks everyone haha. Its easier for me cuz i grew up on learning them all ever since i was a child, but I believe everyone can do it with enough passion and effort. It is harder the older u get but dont give up
english being your 4th language is a big flex omg lmao
I'm so surprised at the straight best friend thing. As a bisexual, its happened more times than I'd like to admit 😔😭
The first girl I fell in love with was straight but I was 15 at the time. After that it never happened again thankfully. I've been with my lesbian soulmate for 19 years! ❤️
@@oop4841 I don't think it's creepy at all. It's actually pretty normal. What is creepy is what you do afterwards. I've also fallen for a straight friend, asked her on a date lol, got rejected and then moved on (after crying for a few months boohoo). We are still as close as we were ten years ago.
@@oop4841 It's quite common lol
same i truly thought more than half at least would say yes. even as a young person, you never fell for yr best friend???
it's happened to me since elementary school like what
the whole “i had a vision of what your life was gonna turn out to be” is crazy and so harmful but so normalized. i hope moving forward parents in the future parents allow the kids they have to live the life they want to live, not based on a fantasy of the parents.
I think it’s completely natural to have hopes and dreams for your child. What makes it harmful is when you those hopes & dreams turn into direct expectations
Yeah wtf, every time in my life when I've asked my mom similar things, she just said that she didn't have one and would love me no matter what.
Well I mean its beyond normal and fine for anyone with children to imagine their future. Every person who has had and will have kids will. It's an exciting thing. It's more about not letting those thoughts become the only possible outcomes for that child. Allowing their kid to carve out their own path and letting your child's interests and experiences shape your thoughts.
it's normal. parents think about their kids future. it is ok
Parents will always have expectations. There’s nothing wrong with that
wish this was longer tbh
^
Agreed. Only 5 questions seems really short
same
That's what she said
@@Magst3r1 😢
a lesbian woman admitting she is still attracted to men.. why are people so afraid to use the bisexual label?
IDK
it’s not cool enough for them LOL
Maybe because she’s not bisexual. Wow shocker.
@@Xplreli Well she not a lesbian either.
That's the biggest issue. Some bi woman complain lesbians don't accept them but they don't accept themselves either.
When she said “If you’re not gonna love me 100% don’t love me at all” … I FELT THAT!!!! 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Love is not a choice. Phobia is not a choice. People should understand these simple things.
@@PROVOCATEURSK they should, but some, unfortunately don’t 😢
@@PROVOCATEURSKhate is a choice. you cant change who you are, but you can change yourself to be more accepting. it can be difficult especially if you have grown up in a hateful family, but it is not impossible
literally cried hearing this
as parents going forward, i feel like there needs to be this preparation for anything, for your child to be gay, trans, lesbian or whatever it may be. instead of having your own idea of what your child should be and have expectations that could change at any given moment.
exaclty parents get caught up in the idea of pushing their children into what they wanted to be, or what they want for them. They see them as another version of themselves, instead of their own person.
exaclty parents get caught up in the idea of pushing their children into what they wanted to be, or what they want for them. They see them as another version of themselves, instead of their own person.
Fr
You should have an idea of what you want your child to grow up like that’s how you lay framework and foundations, what you shouldn’t do is to force things on to your child. Being to forceful is just being a tyrant and being too free and open minded is just neglecting your duty as a parent 🌚 life is all about moderation young grasshopper
The problem is that if you take that approach, then society is going to dictate what your kids should be like.
Your comment bothers me because you are surrendering your role as a parent and giving that control over to society and social media.
I'm confused at 6:40 when Taryn says she wouldn't consider herself fully lesbian, why Jubilee cast her? No shade to bi or pan folks at all, but those are different identities, and this episode is specifically about lesbians.
Interestingly I don't think I can recall any videos Jubilee has done exclusively about gay men having bi and pan men as well. I could be wrong but it is interesting the difference in Jubilee when it comes to this.
@@Rosapond918 no they didnt
@@h.g.warrender5529 they did lmao
I was looking for this comment. It really does invalidate the lesbian community. Both by what she is doing and by what jubilee is doing. But perhaps jubilee wasn't even aware.
Since she has never been with men I can see why she would want to identify as a lesbian but if she still is attracted to men it sounds more like bisexuality with a strong preference for women.
@@h.g.warrender5529 A lesbian is a homosexual female. Perhaps the male is bisexual, but by their own admission they have only slept with females. I have no reason to believe they are not heterosexual, in other words...straight.
please make a longer version of this episode!! this video is wayy too short for the amount of questions that could’ve been included
This is why i feel like lesbians are never taken serious or validated. If this was gay men, the episode would be endless.
@@ijustwannabehappier-v4973 exactly !!
fr, like these videos are usually so long and there are much better more significant questions that could have been asked..
this is exactly what i was gonna say, why only 15 minutes??
@@ijustwannabehappier-v4973 hate to burst your bubble but there is a gay men episode of spectrum and it was 9 minutes long. This is actually on the longer side of spectrum videos.
LETS GO LESBIANS
💃💃🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️
@@shishibenterfa Okay choco Karen 🐒
and the 1 random straight guy lmfao
KJ is a whole as dude so obviousXD
@@erenjaeger1738 maybe transwoman went through one ear and out the other but yeah she's a woman you imbecile.
I’m still shocked about the first question. I thought it was a universal gay experience to fall for a straight person at some point. Maybe not your best friend, but in school having a crush on a straight classmate is so common! But they mostly had gay friends? DAMN They don’t realise how lucky that is!
yeah that’s cause 90% of these girls (and guy, lol) are not gay
I was thinking the same thing 😂 all of my fellow queer friends have admitted at some point to crushing on a straight friend.
They may be slightly aromatic, could just be that they don't have the normative "crushes" kids get. I'm demi bi and I don't have crushes easily.
Yeah I've never fallen for straight friends because I already know they're off limits, but like, random girls I didn't know well who turned out to be straight? Absolutely.
I'm also a lesbian and I had like 50/50 friends? But what happens at least to me is that when I hear that a girl is straight my brain kind of blocked them out? Idk is weird but I never liked any straight friends
For the prompt "I have damaged relationships with loved ones because of my sexuality" - I don't like that phrasing, it implies the blame is on the women for being lesbians when any damage is really due to their loved one's inability to accept their sexuality. It's the loved one's reactions causing damage, not being lesbian.
!!!
Damaged as an adjective, not a verb.
@@LeonidasIV it's about the "because of" part.
and i agree, a better phrasing might have been "because of their reactions to my sexuality"
They should’ve said “relationships with loved ones have been damaged by me coming out” or something like that
Like Leonidas said, I read it as "I have [damaged relationships (relationships that are damaged)] with loved ones because of my sexuality" not "[I have damaged] relationships with loved ones because of my sexuality" but yeah they could've chosen a less interpretive phrase
As a lesbian, lesbianism is truly the best thing that happened to me, yes I’ve lost my parents and closed one bcuz of it but I cannot imagine a different life. Lesbianism is a blessing. Loved the video, let’s goooo lesbians
❤️
❤
I also love being me 😊
women ❤❤❤ I love being a lesbian too
me too :)
Why’d they bring a woman who’s attracted to men on here?💀homegirl isn’t a lesbian by definition
She identifies as lesbian, so she is, therefore, lesbian, to be expressive about some of your attractions doesn’t guarantee that that person feels like they identify as for example, bisexual or pansexual.
@@adrianghandtchi1562 No, The person above was correct. A lesbian is a woman exclusively attracted to other women. You can't just identify as a lesbian and change the whole definition because you want to.
Neither is the trans women.
@@adrianghandtchi1562 if she is attracted to men in any way, she is not a lesbian.
@@adrianghandtchi1562 So with this logic, men who are attracted to women can be considered a lesbian then? Stop trying to change the definition of something just because you wanna be included. It will NEVER happen. Being a lesbian means being a woman STRICTLY romantically and physically attracted to women. Period. Let it be that way.
This felt so short. I thought there'd be more questions. Great group. Would love to hear from them again.
Personally I don’t understand why someone would call themselves a lesbian if they are attracted to men 🧐
She clearly isn't a lesbian :)
@@Amelia-VYeah I understand if you are around lesbian a lot and mostly like girls and watch lesbian movies etc. why you might casually call yourself lesbian without thinking but to go on a video and talk about the perspective of a lesbian is weird.
Because plenty of people did before the 90s
yeah I agree even me who feels I can be attracted to any gender but mostly attracted to women wouldn't dare to say I'm a lesbian because of that
because I can ❤️
The fact that a parent could just stop talking to their own child is so heartbreaking to me. Like at the end of the day, regardless of what your beliefs are, that’s your CHILD.
its not heartbreaking to me anymore. Its called life. Its young people who make their on choices. Some have problems and some maybe not. I dont feel sympathy for a majority. Its sad sure. Think about the killers, and 304. And their family abandon them... Thats there choice. Shame is low... Thats why I guess so many woman think OF is okay.
@@jumpstreet2425 ur a misogynist we don't care
@@jumpstreet2425 except it's not a choice. that's like parents abandoning their child for being a different race. it's illogical and cruel
@@jumpstreet2425 Those homosexual people are born that way, just like how we heterosexuals are born that way.
You can’t force people to accept or like something….
Why was a bisexual woman in a video about lesbians......
why they got someone on here saying they're attracted to men ...
Yeah like..
Bi women invading
Apparently you don’t even have to be a lesbian to be able to call yourself a lesbian????
Maybe that's because of her religious trauma or she only likes male characters but not real men
Maybe bc men who prefer men but do find themselves attracted to a woman now and then are still called gay.
Socially, sexuality comes with stigma like a one drop rule.
This doesn't happen often watching these but no one annoyed me in this episode, they all listened, no interrupting, they were great
i can honestly relate to their experiences with religion, knowing your own parent would choose their religion over you is one of the most hurtful things to experience. i love my religion but it's also destroyed embracing the part of me being queer.
So are you still practicing your religion...? (In the sense if it still hurts you, how could you love it?)
well if you truly believe in your faith then it makes sense does it not?
Try Hinduism, Wiccanism, Bhuddism, Taoism, etc so many lgbt affirming religions out there.
@@vicnad92 What for? , they can be gay without religion
@@hustler212 Religion aint the worst. Its plenty of non religious people who dont get down with lgbtq. Just saying, if you think religion is the biggest problem. Ill give you an example from me. Religion or not I'd not except an OF worker. Some people are the same way with LGBTQ. Cause its can change like feminism did 😂.
If you're attracted to men, you're not a lesbian. I can get people who have had experiences with men in the past or thought they had attraction to men and didn't and don't feel attracted to men anymore, but anyone who is attracted to men is not a lesbian. The lesbian label is characterized by a lack of attraction to men. It's incredibly misogynistic and lesbophobic that people keep trying to redefine the only sexuality that doesn't include men to include them. It's gross.
I could not agree more. So offensive.
Yup. Jubilee is insulting.
yeah fr there's only one label for non-men who are not attracted to men but plenty of other labels you could use if you like men (bi, pan, sapphic, etc) why can't lesbians have one thing :(
@@qi6koI thought sapphic means lesbian?
Also if you're male you're not a lesbian but jubilee had to include a token trans
Can we do a bisexual spectrum one next? That would be awesome! I love these. (And I'm bi).
Yes, I'll love that cuz I'm bi
@@TryingtoTellYou Why is is such a difficult concept lol? Why is it ridiculous that many people get to reap the benefits of both sexualities? In some species, most of their population is bi. And in humans, bisexuality is more common than homosexuality…
@@TryingtoTellYou It just is more common lol. Read a census. I dont get ur explanation at all. I assume that 2 refers to bisexuality but idk what 1 is. Asexuality? Second, wdym how much it is “meant to have.”
@@Zeta523 The human body has a blueprint. Anything that falls outside the blueprint is a mutation and was not meant to happen.
Asexuality is no different. You have a deformed part of your brain that is not according to the human blueprint.
Bisexuality, as I'll explain for the second time, suggests that the brain has evolved such that it may lust for both sexes, which is frankly inhuman.
@@TryingtoTellYou bisexuality is the most in the lgb community, and that's a fact
As a lesbian.......was not impressed by the questions asked in this.......:/
same
Going back to the gay male privilege thing, I feel like there’s a nuance there. Like gay men are more validated than gay women are, but also historically speaking when things like diseases enter our community, gay men and trans women are way more affected. Also I feel like we tend to get hate-crimed more. Again under hetero-patriarchy, we all suffer, but I don’t necessarily think one of us has privilege over the other when it comes to our sexuality
And gay men are more likely to be imprisoned and/or executed. Like in pretty much all over Africa and Caribbean
Also as mentioned in the video, it's harder to be a gay male in society cos you're 'betraying' your masculinity
True. And that mostly comes from transmisogyny, which directly affects trans women. It ain't oppression olympics, anyway. The two groups are oppressed regarding their sexuality and when it comes to gender, lesbians may experience misogyny and gay men, especially femme ones, may endure the discrimination that derives from transmisogyny. Though there are still white cis gay men who are masculine and may go through their lives being deemed as appropriate Men. That's it
it's just so wild to think that at the end of the day it goes down to misogyny
Can you explain how are gay males more validated? Bc I have a hard time believing if that’s entirely true. There’s TH-cam videos made by childish high schoolers asking everyone if they would rather have two gay dads or two gay moms and most of them said two gay moms. It shows that lesbian relationships is more acceptable and validated than two gay male parent relationships.
Just because you are with a female and/or have a strong preference for females, it does not mean you are a lesbian. Bisexuality exists.
facts
Lets not tell people what they are or erase their sexualities, thats literally what the bisexual community has been fighting to avoid for years since it happens to them. Dont be that person
@@sofiabruiz17Not when they literally come out to admit their attraction to the opposite sex and then say they are lesbian because they are with a female. It is like when I said I was straight, and I am bi-erasing myself.
100%.
as i answered in another commet:
stop labeling everyone as bisexual or fluid
having had sex with people of your opposite sex in the past, or not being 100% into people of your same sex (of course that doesn't mean 50%, but maybe to be 90% into people of your same sex) doesn't make you bisexual
bisexuality exists, but don't abuse and overuse that word
if you’re still attracted to men ur not a lesbian …
like the girl in the blue sweater shouldn’t be on this video ..
I absolutely agree with it, when did the girl said that?
@@suyai7772 around 6:50 or so. She goes on for a full minute about her attraction to men
@@WisteriaHex it’s also crazy how nobody else pointed that out… I hope she does not consider herself like a lesbian anymore
@@suyai7772 I think because LGBT ppl are pressured into accepting this stuff or the inclus will get mad and shove us out of our own community
if this episode was about lesbians why did they include a bisexual?
honestly it is screaming bi and pan phobia that girl that said that she isn't a "full" lesbian cuz she is still attracted to men... like honey you r not even a lesbian
Bi Erasure, Biphobic and lesbophobic at the same time.
Maxine is so beautiful and I really hope she knows she's loved even without her father accepting her
My problem with the label “scissoring”, is that they try so hard to separate lesbians from the word sex. Like it’s just sex, who cares how they do it? It’s sex 😭
I hear you. MY issue with it is that “scissoring” makes it seem like the only position for them to do to achieve the kind of effect that scissoring would have. “Tribbing” or even simply “grinding” would be better. You can do that in doggie, cowgirl, missionary, etc. “Scissoring” makes it seem so limited.
I was hoping to see someone on that last question disagree because their sexuality didn’t damage the relationship; the other person’s inability to love them for who they are is what damaged it.
!!!
Isnt that basically what KJ said/represents ?
Damaged as an adjective, not a verb.
It's astonishing that they fell back and stood grouped together on their respective lines instead of just maintaining the default distances. I was not expecting that and don't know why every other group would only move laterally. It was so much easier on the camera, to frame everyone and to not have them turning around for the entire time or only staring at someone's back. Wow.
It makes me think since they've never done it before like this, that they asked the contestants to do it this time. I agree, it makes it easier to watch the screen.
@@6thgraderfriends I think women on the same team just don't have any qualms about coming together, even when disagreeing.
I agree with Jenny’s answer to the ‘gay men are more privileged than lesbians’ because living in a Mexican house hold my mom and I watch gay men relationships on TV and my mom never says anything bad or wrong about them. She even know a mlm relationship in real life! But when a lesbian couple is shown of TV she makes a bad comment about the lesbian couple. So before hearing Jenny’s experience, I never knew other Mexicans who are lesbians had similar experiences.
this is why acknowledging cultural differences and intersectionality is important!!
that just sounds like your mother is the problem... who is that in any way priviledge?
Lol in Italy they hate both, it's a very "Men pov" society , and idk how to describe It but for lesbians Is like "you are kind of acceptable but i don't belive you"
black households too. Lesbians have been shamed by almost every older black women I’ve met, but gay men are celebrated.
@@missmaam2662 I think that’s like the reverse of lesbians being fetishized by men while discriminating gay men. Sometimes women will do the same thing where they fetishize gay men (look at boys love genre) but are uncomfortable around lesbians and a big reason is they might be attracted to them.
11:48 I wanna give this girl a hug! My dad is a bishop in the mormon church. I feel her emotions so strongly while she speaks about her family. In the church you are told family is the most important thing. When they find out this type of information they develop this disconnect with you. So much love for people who have to endure religious trauma♥️
Being raised in a strict Catholic household, I was told many times I was going, "To burn in eternal hellfire." Not okay to hear that as a teenager. Religious and familial shame is the worst, takes many years to overcome (and a lot of $ for counseling).
The gay privilege question is so interesting, because I feel like it’s different societally vs socially. Societally and historically it’s easier to be a queer woman because we aren’t paid as much attention and thus avoid some of the harsher persecution gay men have faced, meanwhile societally being ignored is actually the issue queer women face because we’re invalidated and given less space in society (an example being that there’s literally one lesbian bar in all of LA that just opened last week, meanwhile there are dozens of gay bars in WeHo)
Being Shot or Not having a own bar.....yeah really though choice
well, go and make your own lesbian bar...
Actually I would disagree with the “societally” statement. I think that’s a privilege for for fem lesbians but when a masc lesbian is in public they get harassed. They can’t even go to the bathroom without someone telling them to get out or even calling the cops on them. I think it really depends. Like I know that masculine gay men might not be hated in the same context as feminine gay men when they are out and about just like fem lesbians and mascs
This reminds me of the difference between male and female queerness in football/soccer. For the men it's mostly taboo to the point they get pretend-girlfriends while the women are almost expected to be queer - but of course they still have to deal with misogyny anyway.
Why is there a woman labeled here as a lesbian who is attracted to men? Wtf
I'm just as confused about that one 💀💀
did u see anyone in that room attack her 🫠
I think she was saying she isn't attracted to men now and wish she tried to just make sure. But she knows she is attracted to woman
She's being biphobic 💔
The last question and answers had me especially emotional. I hope they all know it’s not them and their sexuality that has damaged their relationships, but rather the intolerance and hate on the other end of those relationships.
9:14 the sister comment was crazyyyyy 💀💀
All the reasons they said arguing that lesbians are more privileged than gay men were signs of misogyny. It's not a "privilege" to be "accepted" only when you're sexualized.
This is the best statement I've read so far. The internalized misogyny are reinforced in these comments.
@@augustwinston6119I wouldn’t mind fetishisation over violence though.
What’s fetishisation got to do with misogyny? Do you need to use that term for everything?
@@ohuntermc9321yes it is misogyny? women are viewed as objects and so lesbians are even more sexualised by men
The gay men question has so many levels. On one hand, they are generally more accepted into society as who they are. On the other hand, they face a lot of stereotypes and a bunch of other issues that lesbians generally don't (or at least not to the same extent). Its a really hard question, because all identities face their own challenges.
Gay men also face more animosity than lesbians because of the male gaze and perceived 'betrayals' of masculinity due to them being gay
Exactly. They’re treated very differently. No, lesbians aren’t taken as seriously. It’s frustrating. We’re also fetishized by straight men, which is annoying, but can even be dangerous. Some men even feel threatened that women can enjoy sex without them involved. I would say on the other hand, when society lashes out at the community, gay men face more of that backlash. People who are against the community see gay men as a bigger “threat” so gay men are put under a microscope. The current societal backlash is targeting Trans people, particularly trans women, and gay men far more than it’s targeting lesbians.
@@ccrans1216 gay men ? Lol probably trans people . Most of the hate videos I've come across this days are about trans people seems even being gay is much more acceptable than being transgender.
I also feel gay men being accepted depends on the region . I will probably say in most part of Asia for example gay men are far more accepted Maybe because of the bl genre that straight women consume or love .
@@Imetwurld_that's not necessarily true since gay rights and gay marriage is only legally recognised in taiwan in all of asia, as an asian i know the homophobia is far worse here esp from the family since conservative families believe that the son carries on the family name and what not and filicide is a reality we have to face
how can someone who likes men be a lesbian?
Literally, why is that girl on a panel of all lesbians? She's not even a lesbian being attracted to men.
yeah i was wondering what she means by that
sexuality is seen as a spectrum or at least more complicated than just being one thing. someone can admit they have had or have the capabilities of being attracted to men and still be a lesbian because on the scale they fall way on the “lesbian” side. honestly it’s also about what label feels best and more comfortable for you
Yes, they can be
This is why she mentioned the Kinsey scale. You can be anywhere on this scale
Gay------Bi------Straight
If you’re leaning much to one side you are that sexuality or bi if somewhere in between
@@kaileyking3439 That's literally not a lesbian.
If you are attracted to men aren't you bisexual?
Who said they're attracted to men?
…What
@@gl4081 She said I'm still attracted to men
@@trixicenby999 Idk what to say to that since you said someone else said it
I was confused by that as well.
I would argue that NONE of the women here have "damaged relationships with loved ones due to their sexuality"...It's their loved ones having a stance of conditional love (as opposed to unconditional) that damaged the relationships. None of these women actually did the damage; they are just being true to themselves and that is commendable.
no one ever will damage relationships becuase of their sexuality, if the relationship is ruined is because of the other side's hatred, always remember it will never be your fault
I love Taryn but does she even consider herself to be a lesbian? She’s always said she’s attracted to men as well, even in this video. It’s kind of weird that she’s in this video.
Yes, she says herself that she doesn't identify as a lesbian and that she is still sexually attracted to men and wishes to have had sex with them, so as a bisexual she should not have been in this video of homosexual girls / women, although I like her.
I think it's safe to say we all have it hard, that question asking who was more privileged shouldn't have been asked imo
"I'm still attracted to men" why are you here then... You aren't a lesbian
I agree if any of them are attracted to men and women that isn't being a lesbian. It's LGBTQ+ women not exclusively lesbians.
"if you don't love me 100%... don't love me at all"
THIS! i hope everyone can have this mentality. it's not an easy mentality to have, but it's very healthy.
You can´t control feelings. Do parents teach their children nothing?
My gorgeous daughter is in this video! 🥰🥰😍😍 the one with the long black hair 🥰 so proud
Next you should do all bisexuals think the same
omg yes!!
Bisexual women or bisexual men? Or both at the same time that would be intersting
You mean do all bisexuals think anyone actually believes them? Now that be a funny title lol
@@TryingtoTellYou lmao I keep seeing ur comments I think you are bisexual and I’m the closer how could you care this much
@@squirrel9760 This might come as a shock to you but the average person doesn't appreciate being lied to.
13:58 It’s wonderful to know that there are people who have supportive backgrounds. To imagine a world in which no one has supportive backgrounds sounds dreadful.
GOLD STAR LESBIAN HERE…We are allowed to celebrate that because as a woman you get pressured so much to have sex with men or at least try too… so we are valid to celebrate our journey and feel proud of whatever we want. Get over it! ❤❤❤
✊🏾✊🏾✊🏾
Exactly me personally I’m bi but like why would another lesbian be upset about something a completely different person CHOOSES to use like it doesn’t affect you they’re proud let them have something omg
I personally feel sorry for ppl who aren't bc I imagine sex with a person you're not attracted to as sort of traumatic ig
I will say that although I get & understand the whole concept/definition, I still get confused by it at times (past beliefs that I'm working through), but I appreciate & respect it nonetheless 😊😊, because this is unfortunately a male-centered world and that fact alone is a problem (it should be the very opposite), so I'm here for gold star lesbian women as a bisexual woman. 💜💜
@@sittinginbushes I feel that too, and it's unfortunately the fault of social conditioning, forcing these heterosexual dynamics on a lot of people. Girls and women alone are socialized to be male-focused no matter what, so it's ROUGH.
The gay privileged question was weird. We all face oppression. Gay men are more likely to be targeted & lesbians are more likely to be invalidated.
Why is a non-Lesbian on the LESBIAN episode? Why would you let someone who is attracted to men, talk about the Lesbian experience? Jubilee, you should be ashamed.
Bro why is girl who like men here?
literally lmao
Idk… 😭
For people who haven't come out, can't come out, are questioning and/or don't have a safe space or queer people around, content like this is a blessing! BIG THANK YOU
>Video about lesbians
>Invites a bisexual woman
>Invites a literal troon
Define homosexual challenge
lmaoo truth!!
A HOT mess. 😂😂
Not sure why KJ is in this category at all.
why does jubilee invite a trans woman and then ask about scisorring...i was embarrassed for her...i know they wanna be inclusive but idk
wait until you find out that trans women can and do scissor too.
Believe me, I'm coming from a place of love and I don't want to offend anyone.
But isn't it a bit unfair to lesbians (and gay men) to put a Bisexual in videos like this?
And trans for that matter, I always respected Trans but we have such different experiences, mostly regarding to sex and attraction as SEX plays a major role in monosexualities (Homosexual/Heterosexual)
how does a trans women attracted to women experience attraction differently to a cis woman?? i don't understand
@@m-ol5bh because transwomen are male so their attraction to women is straight (opposite-sex attraction) not lesbian (same-sex attraction) to be a lesbian you have to be a female attracted to females and transwomen are not female
@@m-ol5bhbecause she had different experiences than an actual cisgender woman. Her and the bisexual chick shouldn't be in this video. It's called lesbian for a reason.
I disagree. I think having a trans lesbian in this offers a unique diversity of opinion that she even acknowledged in the video!
As for the bisexual women yeah… I suppose it is her prerogative to identify as lesbian instead, she has her own personal reasons I suppose
@@m-ol5bhbiological women are differently socialized
I feel like they didn’t ask important questions like:
-are he/him lesbians valid
-would they date bi women
-are bi women more privileged
Thissss would have loved their opinions on some hot takes, this was very boring
These questions aren’t “important”
Yeah the first one you mentioned was the first thing I thought of. Also the bi stuff I wanna know to.
Also would they date a trans woman. These were so boring. They need to do a “What Lesbians really think”y video to get honest answers.
i didn’t know there were he/home identifying as lesbian
"Scissoring is a real thing" is a really weird question. Like "No, there's magical parriers keeping vaginas from touching vaginas." Is it asking that lesbians like scissoring or something? I mean, saying something you can choose to do exists doesn't mean that you do it yourself anyway.
I don't think being fetishized is a privilege
I’ve never fallen for a straight friend. I usually never befriend someone who I could see as a partner. The only time I did was when I befriended a past crush. After becoming friends,the feelings went away.
It would depend on the person. For me even if I am attracted to someone but I can't be with them I would rather have them as a friend then not in my life at all
Such a weird thing most people do, not wanting to be friends with anyone they are interested in. Seems like toxic behavior that just about everyone has.
Getting to know someone just makes me like someone so much more
It used to be more of a stranger thing but now I’ve failed for most of my close friends! None of em have been straight though (even if I thought one was but I was also like 11)
@@bartell20j I absolutely agree with you
these women were so sweet, such a great group. I loved this
so the person in a violet dess is also a woman?
@@PaperKuka666 Is this a real question? If so, yes. Lesbians are women
@@PaperKuka666yes :)
As a straight woman I was just honestly curious and clicked the video. I really like these agree/ disagree panels, it's just interesting to know everyone's perspective on things :)
So straight women do exist? I'm surprised.
You sure you're not bisexual lol.
I adore how respectful they all were. All listened to everyone's stories with 0 hostility
why is the bi girl there if it’s about lesbians 💀
Why is the trans there if it's about lesbians 👁️👁️
@@Papi_21 trans women are women. so if she likes women, that makes her a lesbian.
yeah seriously i was like wth ?
@@Papi_21 girl what.. u thought we’re gonna agree huh
Ohhh... the male one doesn't bother you? Gotcha!
(some) Straight people really do the mental most to ignore queer existence sometimes. I took an intense 8 week college class, where I was assigned a giant project with a group to present during the semester. I met with my group members once a week before it was due. We also sat next to eachother in class. I sat with and talked to my classmate for like 5 or 6 weeks about my girlfriend and after the class ended he asked me to go get coffee sometime. I was genuinely confused so I asked him directly if he meant a date and he said yes. I was like ...well I still have a girlfriend so no but thanks. I said it more politely but was there a bleep in his mind every time I said my Girlfriend to censor out that I was not available to him?? And this happens all the time I live in the south and in Texas when I say my girlfriend, people hear: my girl friend🤞😜😇 not: my Girlfriend™️😍💅🌈🖤
Heterosexuals, especially heterosexual boys and men are often so ignorant and invalidating lesbian relationships and constantly sexualize / erotisize them or harass and molest openly queer girls and women, often even aggressively flirting with them although knowing that they are already a couple when it is obviously (PDA); it is very annoying, intimidating and so disgusting. 😒
THE EMOJIS 😭😭😭
Fetishizing is not a privilege
At this point in my life I would much rather be hated than fetishized, to me it is worse to be dehumanized.
Isn’t the lady who said she was still attracted to men a bisexual not a lesbian?
It's a shame that there's no elderly lesbian in this group
How are you a lesbian if you are attracted to guys? Doesn't that mean you are bi? Why do some women want to identify as lesbian when they are bi? I'm thinking because saying you are lesbian makes you sound more oppressed and being more oppressed gives you brownie points. That's what I'm thinking unless someone can change my mind
some bi women have a strong preference/only date women and thus feel more comfortable describing themselves as lesbian. if you say you’re bi then people automatically assume you’re open to dating both men and women, but that’s not always the case even if you experience some sort of attraction towards both genders.
I’ve been with my girlfriend for over 5 years. I’m a lesbian, but she’s technically bi. She told me when we first met that she finds men physically attractive, but she can’t connect with them emotionally. She’s so into me sometimes I forget she’s bi. Her feelings for women are a lot stronger than they are for men. She has just as much of a place here as I do. No brownie points involved.
I think it also has to do with the fact that people want to avoid biphobia. It's easier to date another queer women if you are a lesbian than when you are bi. That can be hard when your preference is women.
there is a difference between a physical & a romantic connection
@@user-bc4es6uq8m so what's the definition of lesbian?
I was shocked to see how many lesbians said they didn’t fall for their straight best friend. I feel like if there were more millennial lesbians in here there would have been a lot more that said they fell for their straight best friend since people weren’t even out when I was in high school. There was like 3 lesbians that were out when I was in school. We really have advanced and I love that for the generations after mine.
The last few moments of the video were very hard to watch. These guests are so brave for sharing their experiences! 👏
this was so wholesome and i loved the mutual respect between everyone:)
As a queer person showing up this early for a video is definately a gay sign
I agree I am 0.00...1% gay
watching a video early makes you gay?
No , it's a go outside sign
we get it, your whole personality is being queer...
Oop
It was beautiful seeing most of these girlies talking about growing up with a queer friend group. I grew up (and still am) basically only surrounded by straight people and that’s hard. Being the only lesbian woman in a all group is complicated because it’s genuinely complicated to relate to straight people because your all life is a POLITICAL ACT and most of us have to literally learn to love and be okay with ourselves.
This video was amazing, yes for wlw representation. LET’S GO LESBIANS, LET’S GO.
Mmkay, if you're gonna have a lesbian episode, have ACTUAL women who are solely attracted to women, not a male cosplaying as a (lesbian) woman and not a bisexual woman. This is really simple!!
100% ❤
She is a woman, period.
i feel like gay men usually get judged more than lesbians
like tomboys are super normalized, but feminine boys are seen weird
Exactly
True
but on the other hand butches aren't normalized, there's a boundary between "tomboy" and "too masculine"
I love every single one of them sm I feel like we’re besties awh
The family you always wanted. 💕 💕
I’d love to sit in a circle and talk with these women. They are very open & deep convos are my favorite
The girl with the floral print skirt 😳💗
What about?
@@dr-ozone I think R feels 💕
in the comments searching for her info 🧐
@@beautyofblaque dude it's in the description. socials are always there for all their videos
I really like this TH-cam channel because the people of Jubilee come up with specific topics that many people are unaware or scared to discuss.
In the future, I would like to see a debate between straight and gay women. But, if there is an existing video of that, then maybe:
- a debate between college graduates and college/high school dropouts
Why is blue shirt girl even in this video? She's attracted to men but is on a panel of all lesbians. Like......
You could say the same about the trans women. That’s technically a dude that likes women.
@@defaultuser01 no it’s not
They identify as a woman. Lesbians are sexually attracted to women.
@@Alucardsspouse Get off the kool aid
seriously, is this a joke ?? why are bi ppl in this video
Tbh, I identify as a lesbian and honestly. I sometimes feel insecure thinking what if I'm not a lesbian? Then I have to remind myself about all the girl crushes I've had and how they made me feel and what I think I want at night and how when I like a girl I imagine holding her hand, laughing with her, kissing her, cuddling her, talking with her. Idk how I feel about sex though, I think I might be on the asexual spectrum or maybe graysexual? But I want to be in a relationship with a woman and I'm scared that just means I want to show off that I'm dating a girl and then I think how I literally wouldn't need to be in public with her to be affectionate. I've never officially had a girlfriend or kissed a girl but I wish I could have one.
This is the most relatable comment I’ve seen, sometimes you just want to feel loved and make another girl feel loved too
can we get age diversity on these please?? our Queer elders deserve to be seen too!!
Agreed! I suspect there would be different answers for older people. For instance, the parental issue is likely more accepting with the younger people. I've been out for over 35 years, and I don't know ONE story of a parent accepting their child. Newer generations have the advantage of years of more acceptance in the media, television, etc. Would love a similar video with different generations.
Omg I love the podcast that Taryn has with Cammie Scott!! Glad to see she was a part of this video 🎉
Yes, but why was she there though when she isn't a lesbian / homosexual, but a bisexual: 6:38-6:47 ?!
Huh…scissoring IS a real thing. It feels amazing
I guess it depends because it did nothing for me 🤷🏼♀️
Much depends on whether you are an innie or an outie, and or if you are medications that stifle feelings.
@@cbryce9243 meds suck 😭 😭 😭
10:48 isn’t she cisgender
Is scissoring the same as tribbing
As a bisexual guy (who’s probably more attracted to men) I never came out per se coz my parents and friends were never particularly homophobic so they didn’t really care either way, so I never was in an environment where I thought it was important enough to come out, so my attraction to men just became obvious in a natural way. However although my family weren’t homophobic, my father was extremely abusive in other respects, particularly in regards to my autism, he was also racist and misogynistic towards my mother but he wasn’t homophobic.