The stuff about Schultz and Europeans trying to distance themselves from Americans is pretty confronting, as a Dutch person. White progressives in the Netherlands love to criticize the US about the murder of George Floyd and to post black squares, but when it's december and our blackface tradition comes along again, lots of them are a lot less outspoken. This is very deeply rooted in our culture, where in history class we get taught more about slavery in the US then about slavery in the Dutch Antilles or Indonesia. In the media, there is more focus on racial issues in the US then in our own country and when we think of the civil rights movement, we think about Martin Luther King instead of the people who fight for racial justice here at home. As a Dutch white guy trying to help marginalized communities, but inhabiting mostly white communities myself, it's a constant process of learning but also mostly of unlearning. Which is why these kinds of videos are very valuable. Thanks a lot!
That's the most progressive thing I've heard a white Dutch person say. It's often, we're not as racist as the Americans meanwhile negating their country's history and wealth came from building slave ships and having overseas colonies. But yeah, lets focus solely on the Americans instead of looking inward. Thank you for sitting with that uneasiness and actually looking at it in the face.
Same, the only historical contribution to racist oppression we get taught in school as far as I remember is the role of the VOC and especially WIC in goods made through slavery and directly in slave trade and how it led up to what we call 'the golden age' of wealth. Since there still appears to be less overt racism in the Netherlands it's often difficult to relate content from the US to our situation. But as you said the analysis of Schultz was nevertheless incredibly helpful in emphasising the need for us to look at our own sphere of influence. For example advocating for making Keti Koti, the abolishment of slavery, a national holiday (Sinterklaas seems to be losing to Christmas anyway so might as well replace a blackface holiday with the exact opposite).
Every thing you have said is on point. Living in The Netherlands for over 30 years and counting I find many Dutch use passive/aggressive tactics when it comes to issues of race. They tend to speak/act as if they are the expert, especially on issues of race. I've had many try to tell me all about racial issues as they pertain to America because they've read/ heard all about it, while totally dismissing my having been born and raised as Black in America. As for Dutch racism, it's very nuanced in its applications and often is passed off as naivete about those they see as "other". Funny thing, not really is how as a Western Black I'm treated as a "unicorn" until I point out their hypocritical treatment of non-western Black and PoC, then they go on the offensive.
"Starting fires in communities they don't live on behalf of people who don't want them there" that is it right there. The biggest issue with allies is when that instinct to overcorrect drowns out the words and actions of the marginalized people they're ostensibly there for! Thank you for really laying all this out
Yeah "de wypipo" are the ones who came and burned your neighborhoods in 2020...you know the wypipo put on blackface to loot stores and shoot up Chicago every weekend just to ruin your reputation! Them awful wypipo! :D
@3g0st oh you’re absolutely right. I just meant that I spent a lot of time binging this particular channel last month when I was having trouble sleeping. I do try to consume as much of this type of content as possible (day or night) and have for a while. I just became a big fan of these BMBs in the last month or so :)
this part! it's why i've always rolled my eyes seeing white twitter social justice warriors. It is for their ego, it's about their follower and like count. Overall I think it's a poor platform for social justice just because of all the misinformation that can easily spread, and that 90% of the tweets on racial discussions on that platform are driven by ego & recognition on the platform, instead of actually helping ppl. Not to say there aren't any good ones, but unfortunately the ppl who garner the most attention are usually white, or they are black ppl looking to build their social media presence.
So personally I feel like I’m in an odd situation. I’m an indigenous kid from the Navajo Nation and now that I’ve left my state for college I feel like I’ve definitely felt this ally issue, but mainly from other marginalized people’s. I still have white friends, but rarely have we gone into topics like this. Where I mostly have these talks about allyship are with my politically active Black and Hispanic friends who want to help/discuss my community’s issues but often don’t quite understand the specifics or simply just compare it to theirs. Since I’ve left home, I’ve learned and I get that a lot of people (especially ones that grew up in urban and suburban areas) don’t have much experience with Native Americans or the culture in general. It’s just a bit awkward at times because it often feels like sometimes people think that just because they’re invited to the Cookout that means they also get a free pass to the Pow Wow. They’re definitely similar, and we’re all stronger together than apart, but there’s nuances and it’s important not to project your own experiences on other groups. I’m optimistic though and I believe most of this awkwardness just stems from the fact that we’re young and still figuring these things out. I think as we keep talking and learning from one another we’ll grow to understand and support each other in better ways.
That sounds like an important aspect of allyship to consider: the diversity present and another aspect of the flexibility and humility that needed in order to participate.
I'm interested to hear more about what you're saying so I'm betting that these folks would also appreciate to understand the nuances as well. They won't know unless you tell them. If they're already speaking the language maybe they can learn some new words. Metaphor! Lol good luck!
Oh I feel this as an Indigenous person too (apihtawikosisan)! I'm in the tech field and in Canada (so it's a bit different), but still there seems to be such a disconnect. There's almost this super big discomfort. Maybe it's because they have to reposition themselves as being complicit in the systems of Indigenous oppression and that can be a hard mental shift. Like they have to go from being the one who has/needs allies to being the one who needs to be an ally.
@@AMortifyingOrdeal I can confirm there's a big discomfort with being complicit in a system of oppression that I'm also not intended to benefit from. That's a complex issue and I have lots to learn. Thanks for your posts.
What Justin said about being a real ally really resonated. My (white bougie) parents moved to the South in 1961 to be a part of the civil rights movement - my Episcopal minister Dad worked with MLK's group, the SCLC, through the 60s & early 70s. Some 40 years later, I asked him what that was like. His answer: God sent me to Memphis to teach me humility.
Well in my opinion the human race was lucky to have your father for the simple fact humans can be one of two things: dedicated to following a moral code tied to the concept of equality, or unable to see the world through any other vantage point besides their own. It’s clear which side your father chose to join and I salute him as well as every other white person from that era who knew things were wrong and took action to change it. Full stop. Theres plenty of gray area related to some “allies” and their true motivations for why they allegedly support the causes they claim to support, but there’s also a large subset of people who realize their individual impact may be minimal yet don’t let that stop them from calling out hypocrisy and hate in their own family/friend networks. If we’re going to make any meaningful changes in terms of race, it’s got to happen at a local level like the Avon cosmetics business model. As opposed to the Walmart/big box store model of pursuing true equality… which is essentially “do nothing, but come up with catchy slogans and campaigns involving posting a black screen on social media”.
The Savior irl is scary because it's so conditional and so self serving. That's why I have major issues with a lot of religious charities and "good works". A lot (not all but a lot) of the work is about getting the worker into heaven, not actually helping anyone I find it disingenuous at best and insidious at worst. Not to mention it's incredibly patronizing at any level
My god Here in Brazil the church prey on poor and drug addicts for "rehabilitation", then send them to enter for free in random bus, ask for the money of the ticket and then ask for money for their "charity" Is a brainwashing camp, a cult, and i saw so many doing this on the pandemic, it was infuriating No mask, passing their cheap products arround the hands of the passengers and praying for the bus
Would you consider a figure like John Brown a white savior? Because I don’t think he’s a “homie” because he didn’t become an abolitionist because he grew up in the same community as enslaved Blacks. He could just be an ally, but he is a very important ally as his martyrdom helped push other whites into actively dismantling the south and the institution of slavery. I am bias towards the story of John Brown as my family is from Kansas and he is a pivotal figure in both the Black and White communities in our little home town. However I cannot see John Brown doing everything he did because of his pride, or the cathartic feeling it gave him, he was a believer.
"You're an ally if you feel something". This statement hit hard. My workplace had a Truth and Reconciliation meeting the other day, and while I think it's a good thing it happened, a lot of it seemed focused on how *everyone* was feeling and at the end of the meeting the corporate representative joined chat with tears in her eyes and I wondered how many people on the call were going to go away satisfied they had 'done enough' because they felt bad about a thing and that must make them good people. It reminds me too of a portion in the book called 'The English Passengers' by Matthew Kneale where one of the characters, a kid in Tasmania thinks he's finally making progress getting aid for the plight of his people because some of the rich colonists are taking up his cause, but he realizes on meeting them at a fancy garden party, they're not concerned with him or his troubles, they're mostly concerned with their own pain and feeling like they've done something to help, even if at the end of the day they've just turned someone else's issue into a pantomime of socially acceptable virtue for their own emotional catharsis. Been really enjoying your videos, always leaves me with a lot to think about.
people say all the time when they get their feelings hurt “i was trying to be an ally but now..” etc. and if anything so petty and personal could turn you away from being an “ally” then you were never an “ally” to begin with.
When you were talking about the "Savior" ally it kept reminding me of the Manic Pixie Dream Girl trope. Where a female character, despite being a primary character, often is used to only move the narrative of the male lead. The value of the plot and any growth is never really in her benefit. Her history, dreams, and struggles are shallow and only there to frame what the male lead needs in order for them to make some break through.
Thats generally the case because the movie isnt about the manic pixie dram girl. Its about the lost and confused dude. The story is about him, not her.
@@aureateseigneur5317 Yes, but the point is that when it's a movie about a male character saved by a female lead, at least saved in a more conceptual, not so literal sense, the focus shifts back to the male lead. So the "savior" becomes the secondary character in these movies.
As a trans lesbian, thank you for always bringing the intersectionality up constantly in these video. The savior type is a huge problem in the LGBT community. They mean well but they pick fights with the conservative types that they are not prepared to fight nor should fight at all and it ends up just giving people like Ben Shapiro fodder to spread their hate and say "look how ridiculous these LGBT people are". In the end it just does more harm than good 99% of the time. This video really help put into words why those types are bad for me
Hell yes. This exact dynamic is what made the saga following Vaush's jab at J.K. Rowling so irritating. Like, bruh, you're being asked to back off. That should be enough. Also, love the pfp, that's a great template
RE: fruit flies, putting bowls of vinegar covered in Saran wrap with holes in every room coupled with dumping boiling water down every drain twice a day is cheap and reliable. After 2-3 days the number of flies buzzing around will be hugely reduced and after a week your roommate will leave rotten bananas out on the table for banana bread that will never get made and they'll all be back. Works every time.
I specifically recommend apple cider vinegar, and to add a drop of dish soap to it. Apple cider vinegar smells like rotting fruit to the flies, causing them to fly in and land, but the soap breaks the surface tension so the flies sink and drown.
yeah - fruitflies pretty much go away entirely if you remove their open foodsources their lifespan is so short, that they just die off on their own if they cant reproduce so make sure your trashcan is fairly well closed off and your trashbags are watertight (i once had stuff from the trashbag dripping to the bottom of the bin which was an excelent breeding ground) dont leave food (especially fruit) out in the open and empty out your trash somewhat regularily - another time i had issues with fruitflies, i was using a massive trashcan that i rarely needed to empty out...which gave the buggers plenty time to breed in there that should mostly take care of the issue
"Being an ally should never be about you." PREACH! You hit the nail on the head when you said the ally often uses the marginalized group to virtue signal that they are different but then it becomes politicized and peeps from the suburbs come into the marginalized communities to start havoc and it's painfully obvious that these two peeps are talking to each other and are using the marginalized group as a conduit to air their grievances. You and that interviewed gentleman put into words things I've felt but didn't know how to say. Thank you thank you thank you.
"Being an ally should never be about you.” Have mixed feelings on this On one hand it makes sense that allyship needs to be about the cause and the end goal not just for your benefit or issues but i find it debilitating to say it shouldn’t be about you in any capacity, when you may be the one putting your life, health, and the life and health of your family or others in danger by following the cause.
@@mckenzie.latham91 Your life is about you. The political cause and the political conversation isn't. No one's saying that you don't matter as an individual with individual experiences, just that those individual experiences don't substitute or supersede systemic issues nor should they be treated as the same thing in a political sense. That applies to both negative and positive personal experiences, you can have a conversation about yourself and your life but it's just not gonna be on the same level as a political conversation about systems.
Talking about how Schultz didn't recognize the danger he was putting Django in reminded me of a scene in Black Boy when Wright is working at some kind of store and a white man comes in and wanting to prove himself a "good" white person he attempts to tip Wright $1 for his help. Wright refuses the tip which upsets the white man and he explains that if the other whites saw him accept the $1 he could lose his job or possibly even be killed. That really opened my eyes to how even if I think I'm doing a nice thing, I might not understand the ramifications that a more marginalized person might experience.
This comment brings to mind the problems with giving certain things to unhoused people. Like you don't think of the fact that depending on what you give them, people can become a target for violence just for that thing that you may not even be thinking much of.
@@Blu939 Definitely. A charity publically giving a poor household in a dangerous neighborhood a simple $100 check could make them targets. Being a "candy lady" eventually gets you robbed now matter how old and sweet you may be. Sending your child to school with too much money/jewelry. No good deed goes unpunished in the hood please remember that!
@@Blu939 As a previously homeless person this is true. Unsealed food is thrown away because people poison us. Water bottles are dense and not worth carrying around most of the time due to weight. Having a nice new jacket might last a day. Being offered money might erode the last shred of pride we have left. The ONLY thing you should be doing with homeless people is asking them if they need anything, or reading the signs they hold up. Don't guess. Let them tell you what they would like from you. It's easy and free, and you might save a life that very day.
In my experience as a queer woman, I agree that humility and willingness to make sacrifices (even small ones) are what make a real ally. Being able to listen, reflect on your own bias, and take your cues from actual marginalized people separates those who are here to help others and those who are here to help themselves. And if you can't risk even a tiny transgression or contribute real resources to the cause then you are, from a practical standpoint, useless to it.
While I was watching this, my local barista, young white girl, saw my phone and said “I love FD!” and we talked for 10 minutes about our favorite videos and the work you’re putting into the world. Thank you for what you do. 👏🏻
Your videos are such a sobering experience for a cis white dude like myself, thinking I was some sort of proper ally. You really illustrate the fallacy of white liberalism as using allyship simply to pat ourselves on the back as opposed to addressing the very real and arduous journey of facing systemic oppression for the long term. How we paint ourselves as some sort of heroes when in reality the most we could do is humble ourselves and our flawed perspectives to at least attempt to comprehend the struggle of those marginalized instead of thinking we can fix it overnight. True allyship is about taking the spotlight off of ourselves and become a sidekick to those who understand it better. Thank you
For sure. That humility and openness to listening to other people's experiences, and really listening when someone from the community we're trying to be an ally to tells us a way in which we're participating and supporting a system that harms them--and also not getting caught up in feeling guilty or hurt when we find that out--which would center our own feelings and experiences again--and instead just trying to competently listen and try to understand what we can do to try to remove support for that system. I'm not sure "sidekick" feels like the best word to me, though. It's a rare sidekick that possesses more powers in a situation (living in a white supremacist culture, being given the benefit of the doubt in more situations) than the main character. But I think I get the non-centered, team-player vibe I think you were going for. And absolutely the "not overnight" thing. I think that's what hardest for a lot of white people to comprehend: that white supremacy is ingrained, the harms and inequity are entrenched in our social institutions and communities...that racial justice in this country is a long way off, and that there's generations of work to be done--that's a hard sell for people who don't have to feel like they don't have any skin in the game. A hard thing to hear from the black people who I know was hearing them say that the reaction to George Floyd's death probably wasn't going to change very much. I was so hopeful that America had reached some kind of turning point, and many of them were quite skeptical that any real substantive change was going to happen at all. That was so horrifying, I wanted to believe that any decent human being would be changed by seeing that. It was a lesson in how much black people have had to learn to live with in this country for so long. Outrage is something that can be felt, and is easy, but commitment, and follow-through, being willing to actually learn and practice differently, and a lifetime of making decisions differently is not. I really appreciate his videos too, man. These really help me to understand.
I wish there was more TH-camrs like him but for Brazilians We have similar problems to the US but they aren't the same and i think there is literally only one channel radicalizing people and no minoritie's channels
Oh damn. I’ve been like “man, I love making Republicans angry,” but what’s the point of that if, like, shit’s not going to change. Cool. I’m going to go self-reflect. Thank you. Like a ton.
Came to this realization a few years ago when my trans friend posted something along the lines of "I wish cis allies would put as much effort into making trans people feel loved and supported as they do trying to piss off TERFs" and that really made me realize how toxic that kind of behavior is, not just when it comes to trans issues
I think the other problem is conservatives and reactionaries will always find something to blame. Marginalized groups can do what conservatives say, and conservatives will say they did it wrong. Or they can ignore conservatives and the conservatives will say they're thugs. Damned if you do, damned if you don't. So why bother engaging with them at all? There's nothing you can do to change their minds, they have to fix that on their own. Engaging with them on social media or in public only platforms them and validates they're worth talking to. I dunno. Obviously, you can't ignore them completely because they block you at every path. Maybe we should just be better at how we choose our battles.
@@junjiito6298 It's not the conservatives you need to change. It's the liberals. They treat black people like children, and there's a fair number of black people that eat that crap up.
As a white guy I was really humbled when a guy at my job was being discriminated against and showed way more grace than I wanted to with the situation. Following his lead I stayed clam, and ended up being able to see a lot more racism in our workplace, against him and others. I played my role and a lot of managers ended up saying things either directly too me or within earshot that could be reported, and were. Lots of the managers ended up leaving the store due to the constant write ups and the whole store ended up closing a few months after all this came to light, thankfully most people had already moved on or barely needed the job anyway.
I remember being forced to read "to kill a mockingbird" in school. And I remember needing to write a paper how you feel about it. I HATE that book. I know it was good for the times, or whatever, but they're so many better stories for black lives. Heck, it's not even about the white savior it was about his kids. I remember going into detail how it was boring and why I hated the characters etc, and after my teacher drowned it in red ink, because I wasn't giving the white savior trope any room to breathe. She did not like perspective as a black girl
I personally like the book and believe it was really well written but damn, as long as the critique was constructive the teacher should've been more willing to see another perspective. Academia way too often neuders the effectiveness of older media by refusing to create any discussion on it. I think it's a good book but it's just mindnumbingly boring when you're just being told how and why to enjoy something. The author herself would've likely been more interested in such critique. I feel like this happens a ton in white culture; once counterculture becomes accepted it's blindly praised; often being treated separately to the time period it was created in and it looses the meaning it once held and the lesson it can currently provide.
@@randomguyontheinternet7940 I will say the trial was by far the most interesting and well done. However the rest of the book for me wasn't entertaining. There just wasn't enough there for me to actually care about the kids. Especially when there's a innocent person being framed for something he didn't do.
"Allyship is more than the catharsis you get by doing the right thing." Dude, i mean come on, I don't know you're able to distill complex ideas into hard-hitting single sentences like that! I know conversations like this should never be boiled down to punchy one-liners, but damn it's still impressive when you punctuate a well argued point with a fucking fire line.
Honestly these are the sound bites we need on the left. American leftists have always sucked at coming up with "marketable" messaging and we suffer for it.
"the catharsis you get by doing the right thing.” That’s the reason the vast majority of anyone, black, white, hispanic, asian etc. etc. ever do the right thing pretending like the majority of people do the right thing for any other reason than personal or some form of selfish means is wishful thinking. Very few, if not incredibly rare breeds of people who do what they do for 100% altruistic means is one out of every ten million etc. etc that’s why so few of these figures have ever existed in history and why they are such outliers among the masses.
@Mckenzie .Latham Stop being so naive and reductive, no one here is saying anything close to what you're straw-manning, reality is far more complicated and bleak than what you describe yet it is easy to see that people can do the right thing for any number of reasons. Regardless treating certain people as outliers (both statistically and focusing on historical figures instead of "the masses") is neither accurate or moral.
"shultz and candie argue, fight, kill and die over who is the least brutal oppressor, and black lives are hanging in the balance" i think every single white "ally" needs to hear this. I'm so glad khadija brought me to your channel, love your insights and thougthful analysis.
"i think every single white "ally" needs to hear this.” I’ll remember this the next time people, try and get me to care about another black shooting, after all i better stay in my lane to not get other people caught in the crossfire guess? again this is not saying anything this is not telling us what to do or how to help, it’s just wagging the finger at us for our faults like we’re the only ones who have such fundamental flaws that sabotage us and others.
@@mckenzie.latham91 Come on, is that really your response to a statement like this? Your comment is an unfortunate oversimplification of what is being talked about here. I think the video clearly explains what is beneficial and what is not. Instead of buying into the ethos of the us/them mentality maybe just put more thought into what is actually being said here. Why are you getting so upset about a "group" you "belong" to being criticized? Why do you feel so offended? Is this this really a statement on your personal character or something else? Ironically, this is the embodiment of the behavior white "allies" are criticized for in this very video. Will you only "help" if you are praised for everything you do regardless of whether or not it is actually helpful? I'm not trying to make you feel bad about having an emotional reaction, really. Like F.D. commented on poignantly, this entire process takes a large degree of humility, and people need to be willing to be wrong and examine their thoughts and behaviors, which is obviously difficult for everyone. Its complicated, and that's the reason why F.D. plugged that organization, because they specifically exist to help people like you and I who may be confused as to what is productive and what is not. At the end of the day, the biggest thing that has helped me and may help you is to really think about why we viscerally react to instances of criticism, learn to separate that criticism of our broader "group" identity and carefully apply it to ourselves (think, have "I" specifically done or thought this? why/ why not? If not, then it doesn't apply to me, but what can I do better etc.) and then evaluate why it is you are trying to help ( am doing this to make myself feel better or am I doing this see tangible change?)
@@zackwalker5701 " I think the video clearly explains what is beneficial and what is not. “ It doesn’t actually, and it leaves out key context. For example using Django Unchained, F.D. tries to portray Shultz as a bad ally based on his actions there, which was a screw up, even Shultz himself admits it before he dies but the point i would make is look at Shultz’s actions throughout the film 1. Frees Django from the slave line 2. Not only frees django, but also frees the other slaves, instructs them which way is north and freedom, and then advises them how to kill the surviving slaver, so that his body wont be found and they can get farther away to escape 3. takes django under his protection, teaching him to not only defend himself but gain the skills he can use to take revenge and rescue his wife later on 4. Actually agrees to help Django find his wife and tracks her down for him 5. Accompanies Django into Candy land even hutch he cannot stand Candy or the slavers hpcorsy and pretense of sophistication (as well Prussia/Germany did not participate in the slave trade, so the line about the brutal oppressor" dick contest doesn’t even hold water) Yes Shultz screws up at the last minute but that is because he’s not perfect and was prone to flaws, like any human being. I think shultz can be considered a flawed ally but not a bad ally, as he is undeniably the only reason Django ever got freed and or ever found his wife, period and yet that doesn’t factor in at all to how he was an ally... And that’s the point, we’re expected to be allies but then when we do things that do help its ignored the moment we fail or drop the ball on one thing, and those other things just are assumed to never have happened. It’ the same struggle that many civil rights leaders gave LBJ for taking his time on the civil rights act, even though LBJ wasn’t dragging his heels, it was cause he was doing all he could, but was having to manage his fellow Dixiecrats as well as ensuring he could get enough votes to make a veto proof legislation and yet many POC would call him out for this as if he didn’t care and or wasn’t motivated at all, even as he was doing his job. F.D even admits that the whole reason for that scene in Django was also to ensure the big shoot out happens, and yet people and him act like the film is portraying a bad idea even after admitting entertainment was the main goal i even saw someone in here call out Tarintino for writing that scene despite supposedly being an ally in real life, even after the person admits that it was more for entertainment purposes. "Will you only "help" if you are praised for everything you do regardless of whether or not it is actually helpful?” I don’t care about praise, i just want credit where credit is due...If someone is trying to be an ally and help, even if they may screw up or fall short, it should not land them labeled a total bad ally if they are trying to use and or benefit from the “cause” for their own personal gain, then yes, call them out but not everyone is perfect and going to be able to be perfect in every situation you want and i don’t think that discloses someone who generally intendeds to help or means well as not being a good ally. Like i said Shultz screws up, but everything else he does in the film helps and benefits Django, and yet somehow that isn’t factored into him being an ally at all...
"and that's the reason why F.D. plugged that organization, “ Yeah that’s another thing i checked that organization out and i was surprised to find it’s not a non for profit, it’s a paid three day seminar, for profit organization which turns my head a bit.
@@mckenzie.latham91 No one is forcing you to be an ally or forcing you to care. If you're getting so up in your feelings about not being given credit, or being berated when you do allyship 'wrong'... then don't be an ally. Go about your business and stay out of it. The actions you're describing of Schultz are more white saviourism than allyship. He saves Django, then trains the childlike savages to rise up against their oppressors, then magnanimously gives his life killing a white man who's more racist than he is, to prove how good a white man he is. Okay. But those were his decisions. After freeing Django, he could've gone his way or helped in other ways. But he literally centred himself to death because he was so stuck on feeding his ego; Django becomes essentially a cardboard cutout in his own story, dragged into conflict when he didn't need to be, just so Schulz can be centre stage. If you want recognition for being an ally, maybe you're doing allyship for the wrong reasons. Instead of being bitter and deciding not to care, you could take a look at yourself and ask why you're so wrapped up in this ally identity. Who are you doing it for? Right now, it sounds like you're doing allyship for yourself. And because you're not being made to feel good about it, you turn on the marginalised people you claim to want to support. It's not their fault you're a shit ally, it's yours. So do something about it, or stop complaining that you're not getting adulation for being an ordinary decent human being.
I want to validate the 'homie ally' existing in the disability community. My disabled friends and I often joke about our disabilities with each other. But... Abled people who spend time with us can get too comfortable and chime in. For us these Jokes are a survival mechanism but there is no reason for them to chime in. *This is not to center the conversation around me. I am listening. But just want to validate that phenomena existing in other communities as you mention.* Love this video and love your work.
I've also noticed that people tend to co-opt their assistance as being something more than it really is. My sister is disabled so I've seen it plenty of times from classmates to the nurses who come in in the mornings to assist. Maybe I'm biased because this has been my life for like 23 some odd years now so I'm used to assistance being required in her situation, it's not really a big deal; but to someone who maybe doesn't have the opportunity to work with disabled people regularly it can seem a bit more monumental of a task to lend a hand with her. I dunno, I've noticed stuff like this in a lot of communities, especially in LGBT+ spaces.
Why is it suddenly not ok if an abled person makes these jokes? What do you even mean by "survival" mechanism? And why does your jokes supposedly being a "survival mechanism" make it no ok for other people to joke with you?
@@hoominbeeing i mean if you'd watch the video you're commenting on then you'd get the gist of why you shouldn't just let yourself into communities you're not a part of, it's not really anybody's job but your own to educate yourself on how to be a better person. grow the fuck up
I just want to say how much you've helped me grow and opened my eyes to thins I have done that don't correspond with being a good ally. I'm sad that it took others to hold me accountable, but regardless...thank you
'True heroism is minutes, hours, weeks, year upon year of the quiet, precise, judicious exercise of probity and care-with no one there to see or cheer. This is the world.' - The Pale King
Kinda weird that Quentin Tarantino, of all people, was able to so deftly express that flaw present in many white allies of placing his own "honor" above the well being of the people he's supposed to be helping.
@@Temudhun I think it reads as pretty clearly deliberate. Django and Brunhilda clearly just want to get out of there and go live their lives. That was the plan. And giving into his pride is clearly a grave error that could have ended with all of them dead (and Schultz does die).
Nah it wasn't on purpose. Tarantino is just a genius storyteller and knows a lot about black culture. When you're like that you just stumble upon deep insighful stuff without even trying. I'm 100% certain that Tarantino conceived Schulz as a genuine noble _selfless_ character.
@Boubouh I think it was mostly a vehicle for having a bloody climax but I also think it was intentional because they built up his difficulty reconciling his pride as a good white with “refined european tastes” and him having to play the part of a slave owner when dealing with candy
@@andreja9425 Oh yeah, if I were to guess at the writing process: THING ONE: This plan needs to go badly so Django has to have a bloody shootout climax. So how? Maybe theres a major slip up at a critical moment? Or just some random event that Django and Schulz couldn't foresee? No, it would be more narratively satisfying if they fuck it up... no, not Django... Schulz fucks it up. And he dies for it. So how...
I have to applaud Roberts willingness to be vulnerable and admit he was unclear on what Ally means.. I wish more people had that kind of emotional bravery.
So, this got recommended to me today, and the European moral high horse resonates so much with me, because while racism may not be as obvious and overt as in the US, it is still present. I've been living here 30 years, one of my parents is European, and yet people are always shocked when they hear me speak the language without issues. Yesterday someone (who's known me for at least 5 years and knows that I got ALL of my schooling done here) asked me whether I got used to the climate and I was so peeved by the question that I answered "After 30 years, I don't even remember what the climate was in South America..." People in Europe like to think that they're very open and welcoming and not racist, but they still have racism related prejudice and they don't even have the awareness to see it.
Us white left-wingers have a tendency to point at the right, and say, "Well, that's obviously where the problems stem! It's not us!" But like, no... Some of us are problematic, too. We want to pretend like we're "helping" by not being overtly racist, but that's not enough. It's not. Be friends with black people. Listen to black people. Actually try to understand other groups of people. Not just pretending "not to see colour." We have to see it, we have to try to understand the viewpoints of people of various different backgrounds, nationalities, etc. And individually, we've got to try to overcome any of our implicit biases. Hell, just to admit when we have them, as a start. At least.
The danger of "ally" as an identity is that it amounts to a majority dominant group casting themselves as one community with the marginalized groups. I think it would be best to abandon the tumblr impulse of giving everyone a special flag and identity. Allies are those who act in concert with marginalized people in specific ways to protect and promote their interests. Thus you can say that LBJ was acting as an ally when he pushed through the Civil Rights Act without worrying about the wider implications of casting him as some kind of fundamental "ally." It's situational.
Plus, it gets really messy if you reduce someone to "ally". You can end up with groups that are all allies to each other, with all the complications and reductionism that implies. And what happens when that identity of "ally" is threatened? We're all just made from very flawed matter, and few people handle an identity challenge well, their first time. From personal experience: Allies to the poor and mentally ill are all kinds of colors, genders, orientations, and experiences. Many of them have dealt with well meaning allies who made things worse, without that experience helping them avoid every mistake when they tried to help others. If there's no real communication, and "allyship" is just assumed because of good intentions and good company, it almost always ends in disaster. For example, I had to learn, the hard way, as a kid raised in a racist white Hanover, PA that it worried my then girlfriend to listen to me talk about the novelty of being in an interracial relationship - was it a fetish thing? Fortunately, she figured out I was an idiot who never talked about race before, and watched way too much terrible stand-up. And she, growing up from a wealthy banking family in Trinidad, had to learn that I couldn't just solve all my problems by tapping into connections or money. In fact, I had no idea what to do with money, as she found out when I sent her my money ahead of my arrival in Trinidad, because I didn't feel comfortable carrying it on me. Which really turned into an issue, when the authorities at the airport asked how much I was carrying, and assumed I was an illegal immigrant. Being detained taught me a hell of a lot about my white privilege. And her having to rescue me? That taught me how important allies are. And what allies need to do, to be considered allies. If I'm not actually making someone's life better, or helping them deal with shit? I'm not an ally. I'm an obstacle.
A family is a family. It's not that I consider white and black Americans as one group -- they are one group. I have way more in common with a black guy who grew up in Chicago than I have with a white guy who grew up in Prague. If anything I have a strong bias in the black guy's favor because I know him. With him I can spend countless hours talking about sports, food, sports, weather, sports, music, and sports. With the white guy I'd be limited to asking questions about Dracula, which would be awkward because that's the wrong country. I care about black Americans because they are Americans. I don't need another reason. It goes deeper than just caring about people in general.
Man, I'd love to hear your take specifically on Hispanic allies, because while we share a lot of struggles in the US, a lot of Latin America is mega racist, or think racism is over and just an American thing, and since "Hispanic" allows any skin color, even within a Hispanic community, you'll have white Hispanics being racist towards black Hispanics, and while Hispanics love to think that "your fight is our fight", I think it's way more complicated than that (it's a great sentiment, though). We're also not treated the same by whites based on how we look (as you can see from my profile picture, I have a pretty light complexion, my nickname sounds pretty American, and I don't usually have a noticeable accent (years of training), so I have the privilege of getting to avoid a lot of racism), and to complicate matters further, Hispanics were also slave owners. One of my ancestors was straight up a slave trader after the natives were enslaved and then wiped out and they had to bring in black slaves. Excuse any weird wording, English isn't my first language.
This is a good topic to touch on. I was born and raised in Newark and grew up around Spanish, Asians and black folks, so a lot of the N word, Spanish and Asian slurs were thrown around both as a term of endearment and as a term of hate. Racism is alive and well within our black, brown and yellow communities, as well as homophobia and sexism. While both communities have become more inclusive and diverse, and sure we both have shared similar struggles, the racism’s is still prevalent today. I too have avoided some of the harsher side of racism and because I’m Latino, I was accepted into racist white circles where I was told “you’re one of the good ones”, a comment I thought was a compliment in my youth but later realized what it was.
I’m part white Hispanic - the castiza thing is real. I benefit in the USA being light and also in Spanish countries. Frankly, I think whites in Hispanic and Latin countries are far more racist than whites in the USA. Though I will say my white Hispanic family in Puerto Rico is far more racist and biased than my family in Valencia, España. I have found Spaniards to be far more aware of their history than others in the Hispanosphere.
Racism is all over the globe due to imperialism, colonialism and chattel slavery. Since the US is the empire that dictates how things work globally then that comes with conditioning and propaganda of the masses of people on how to see people, things and the entire planet as a whole. Nonetheless, allow that are symptoms of the problem. If root of the problem is not rooted out, it will mutate and create others symptoms to the problem.
THIIISSS!!! I moved to the UK from Chile a couple of years ago, and it is so confusing. I have white privilege in Chile but not in the UK...and even though I'm mixed (lebanese-chilean-italian), the way people see me in Chile, where there is a lot of racism and elitism, is as italian, meaning white...but not in the UK. I have tried to explain my parents this and they don't understand, they actually think there is no such thing as racism in Chile...when they visited, I tried to explain my dad (who is white) that I have been followed around in shops but that he probably wouldn't have that experience, and he looked at me like I'm talking nonsense. And people from my background don't understand that we have erased black citizens from our history, or that we are ragingly racist against indigenous people. Also, it's been a whole new thing to acknowledge my own privilege while at the same time working on my biases and on receiving bias in a new country...ver eye opening and difficult. This is what we lack in Latin America, the awareness that this touches us also.
As a sidenote (and at the risk of sounding like a "actually" boy), Alexandre Dumas was the son of a black father and white mother. It was his father, Thomas-Alexandre, who was the son of a white slave owner father and a black slave woman. Thomas-Alexandre went on to become a General of the French Army, and along with Toussaint Louverture remained the only two black men to become generals in western military until the 1970s. He died in poverty after Napoleon undid some of the French Revolution's gains (going so far, if I'm not mistaken, as to prohibit black people from living in Paris) and being basically hated by Napoleon on a personal level. Not salient to the video, I know, but I think it's worth pointing out the life of Thomas-Alexandre.
While we're being pedantic, Gen. Benjamin Davis was promoted to Brigadier General in the U.S. Army in 1940, so you can add him to the (exceedingly short) list alongside Dumas and Louverture.
Also add to the list, Vicente Guerrero who was Afro Mexican and became a Mexican President (who coincidentally abolished slavery over 30 years before the US). Add, Jose Antonio Maceo the “Bronze Titan” of Cuba who helped make Cuba independent of Spain.
He was captured after a battle and normally in that time you would ransom out your generals an example is george washington was ransomed out by england during the english french war, the reason he wasn't ransomed out was he was popular enough to be a threat to napoleon. He was released after the french beat ferdiand 4th, with no back pay, partially paralysed, blind in one eye and deaf in a ear from what he thought was poisoning. he died a few years later and his statue along with is his son's and grandson's were taken down during the nazi occupation of france.
Also add Ivan Abramovich Hannibal, General in Chief of the Russian Imperial army, and his father Abram Hannibal, also a General in Chief of the Russian Imperial Army.
This is some real ass shit. Ive asked my self that alot lately. Do I really care for marginalized people of color or do I just despise all the dumb, southern, conservative bs ive had to be brought up around. I know I care about other people but its in that vague "everybody get along" type mentality. Youve given me aot more to think about. Awesome video dude!
I’ve especially seen this kind of thing with trans people (as a trans guy myself) but also a lot with Jewish allyship?? Like, it’s never “trans liberation now” or “Jewish voices matter in this topic”.... it’s always “fuck terfs” and “punch a nazi”. It’s about hating the oppressor and not helping the oppressed.
@Maxwell Long It's a fraught topic. I know that Nazis and TERFs hide behind people that look like me, so calling them out is my job. But is it my place to pick whose voices from another community should be uplifted? Clearly not, right? Plus, look at how the people that get uplifted by the dominant society usually aren't the ones that really challenge the power. Then that "sit back and listen, don't make it about you" thing kicks in and not wanting to fuck it up makes "uplifting" people complicated. But it's easy to see how kicking the Nazis and TERFs out of the "town center" and giving marginalized people a bigger place in our conversation helps, and it helps in a way that white folks know is their work to do, and it doesn't rely on us to pick who we want to platform. Maybe there's going to be a clearer path to mutual empowerment in the future but right now it can be hard to feel like you're doing the right thing unless you're listening a lot, getting out of the way a lot, and mostly just sabotaging the systems of oppression that live in your own community.
With me a question is sorta like Elphaba's from "Wicked" "[Am] I really seeking good? Or [am] I just seeking attention?" So far my answers are "I do want a better world, a better country for all people because I don't want to be complicit in oppression, but my desperate need for validation because I have trouble producing it in myself seeps into that sometimes and I need to watch out for that because that helps no one. Not oppressed minorities or myself."
@@readytobebolder As a trans person I agree, and as a life-long hater of nazis, it took me an embarrassingly long time to realize I should actually learn about the jewish community. Although, most of the "fuck terfs" people are trans, I think...? But yeah I would love if even one person said "Don't talk over trans voices". People act like we're lab rats, like we can't possibly have relevant opinions about our own bodies and experiences.
I love what that woman said, "how much do you like to be right?" because that applies to anyone who has an ego. I love to be right, I love winning arguments online, but when it comes to being an ally, I have to be able to set my ego aside, I have to be ready to be quiet and let other people make their voices heard. I have to be able to say ok, I'm wrong, and that comes with expanding my perspective by listening to black people and realizing, 'ok, I didn't think of it as being like that' now I realize I couldn't even comprehend that person's experience/view point. some people can't make that secession and they go from fighting racism to being racist just so they can maintain this idea they have of self righteous superiority, and its like bro...you just lost the entire plot
@@cruzalta1696 well you don't fear for your life when cops are around. Honestly privilege does feel nice. But recognizing that comes with an overwhelming sense of guilt, especially when you see how others are treated in your own community, or how your peers act-pretending like they aren't privileged while holding views that are completely afforded by it.
It's taken me years to see how I have perpetuated and accepted "ally" behaviors as a mixed POC with lighter skin. It's insidious how much I internalized anti-blackness and assimilated with white culture to survive at the expense of my more marginalized friends and myself. Thank you for this video. A reminder to keep reflecting, unlearning, and listening.
Blindspotting came out the same year as Green Book, and the fact that the former is an underground gem and the latter won Best Picture is ludicrous. Also, on a purely technical level, Blindspotting not getting nominated for Best Film Editing at the Oscars while Bohemian Rhapsody won the damn thing is a sin I will never forgive.
You talking about the older movie with the two guys that work for a moving company and the one guy witnessed a cop commit murder? That's a great film! There's a recent show called that that's trying to cover up that movies existence, I swear.
It's a shame how easy it is to be ignorant of marginalized people until it's someone that you care about deeply, and then you feel compelled to be an ally. I myself have been guilty of this until recently. I just want to thank you for your content, and how eye opening it's been. I'm sure my girlfriend feels the same way. She absolutely doesn't have time to explain every little thing to me, and you really help me do my homework, and gain a broader understanding.
“It's a shame how easy it is to be ignorant of marginalized people until it's someone that you care about deeply, and then you feel compelled to be an ally.” The issue is that this is actually the way 90% of the population works, empathy builds better when he we can see and or feel it happen to those closest to us as opposed to seeing it far off and or not having the same personal connection. This does not make you inherently flawed as it seems to be implied. It just means you have be more open to expanding your empathy and understanding of situations when it deserves it.
@@jermanizer Everything in this thread is an unnecessary comment. You commented and you comment because you want to, not because you are obligated and or it is required for you to add your two cents that’s the whole point about these public forums.
the discussion of allyship always brings up for me this quote: “If you have come here to help me you are wasting your time, but if you have come because your liberation is bound up with mine, then let us work together.” ― Lilla Watson
I think my biggest issue in my own journey learning how to be an effective ally is letting go of righteous indignation when it comes to people on the other side of the moral and political spectrum and finding a balance between holding people accountable for their bad behaviour while still understanding the system that created their belief structure and figuring out how to overcome the system and not just admonish or dehumanize the people I feel aligned against.
(Love your name) I think it's become more difficult bc injustice and damaging marginalized groups has become very extreme in many ways. Meaning people in power have been having a field day cutting off the rights of and endangering marginalized groups in ways that are frankly inhumane. It's hard to find the humanity in someone who is denying the humanity of others, if that males sense. So I think that makes it difficult not to be fueled by righteous indignation when the degree of harm is so great. The greater the harm, the greater the emotion. I think on a one-on-one level it's easier to try to find the humanity of the opposition, for lack of a better word, provided that individual is even open to a dialog. But when we're talking about the larger and more powerful groups weilding their privilege like a weapon it's difficult not to view them as a monolith in a very us VS. them way. This video is a year old and heated, manipulative rhetoric or mishandled allyship is an even worse problem. People are getting shot while getting their mail, or jogging, or just disagreeing. Everything feels heightened and more volatile. Not exactly an environment for reasonable and open conversation, and I think that muddies the water when it comes to allyship. Hope that made sense.
about the fruit flies put some apple cider vinegar in a jar, add a tiny bit of dawn, swirl it around, cover it in plastic, and poke holes in the plastic. change it once a day and you'll be fruit fly free in a week.
@@collyflower6623 Dish soap breaks down the chitin, killing them. The vinegar should be potent enough to do so on it’s own though! 🤗 I usually use Dawn on sink drains if I notice the fruit flies collecting around those areas.
11:20 thank you for bringing up other groups who do experience this. I am not black, I am queer and (this may sound strange but i have pretty severe neurodivergence) it is valuable to me as a queer person to hear someone from another marginalized group foster a sense of community and empathy between marginalized groups. It not only validates my (and many others) queer experience, but it continues to solidify the solidarity, empathy, and respect that we should have for one another as minorities and human beings.
I just have to say, 1. Content is phenomenal as usual. 2. I’m so thrilled you are sponsored! 3. That you have a sponsor that isn’t a deviation from your content or one that is over saturated and just a cash grab (i.e. Hello Fresh, Skill Share, etc.). I love that you are specific and intentional with who you sponsor with.
The word "ally" always bugged me cause I keep thinking of it in like a global political sense. Countries are allies, when it suits them. They still spy on each other and try to get their own political agenda across. They can make new allies and break with old ones. So there's always this part of me that feels like, idk, it's the wrong word? I mean, maybe it's accurate in a lot of ways. Performative wokeness is a thing. It's still political. And white ppl still end up pushing their agenda above others. But... Could the word be part of the problem? Like if other people out there are like me and applying it's meaning as something similar to watch countries do, than aren't you kind of always expecting your Ally to turn on you? And as a Ally, aren't you more likely shift your alliship when it suits you? Idk. Just a thing I think of sometimes
I know what you mean. I think the best thing white people can aim for (I'm white myself) is to be friends to marginalised communities. Friendship > allyship, because at the end of the day allies (in the global political sense) are just trying to further themselves forward. They're using their relationships with other countries/communities to push their own agendas. I think it would be really interesting to know how the word "ally" came to be used in a racial/social justice context because it has those subtle negative connotations. I say white people should aim to be "friends" but even that word feels a little bit off.
But a supporter CAN also be patronizing, like „having to support someone who couldn’t handle it themselves“ An ally should technically be more on the same Level, but usually they aren’t
I think that's exactly why 'ally' is the right word. It sounds like its coined by marginalised identity groups to describe privileged people who intend to help (or say so). Yea allies can betray, change allegiance, not show up, or desert the cause. And history suggests that's what often happens. Cause 'allies' will never be as invested as the group they are trying to help (ostensibly), because they aren't part of that group. In fact they benefit from that group's marginalisation. So the term 'ally' seems spot on to me, cause it captures the continued difference between the 'ally's' and the marginalised group's positionalities and all that that entails.
Your the first person in social media that i´ve heard say that you can't become an expert in a topic only by researching a couple weeks, or simply adressing this point. I think sometimes it's to easy to forget about that, and how most people who engage in this topics are just learning, not experts. Even experts have trouble understanding and arriving at some basic consensus when the topics are so complex. Just wanted to say it's great!
Thanks for reccomending "Racism Without Racists", as a white person I think it's actually pretty accurate, a lot of the thought patterns it talks about are ones I've noticed but haven't been able to fully label until now. Like whites being more likely to criticize POCs: a lot of the time, I would notice someone's race, but convince myself that I needed to criticize them while ignoring it in the name of colorblindness. That felt good, so sometimes I'd start looking for something to criticize when I saw a POC. I was vaguely aware that this was bad, but in the name of "colorblindness" I tried _(actively)_ not to think about it, but in some backwards way I thought that by ignoring race I was promoting equality.
Maybe a big problem of all depicted types of allies is that they most always just do what they think is right, instead of actually listening to the group they wanna support or asking them what they can do. For me personally an „ally“ isn’t necessarily someone who jumps in and solves my problems when I’m struggling, but more often someone who can help me to find strength to help myself. Someone who is there because they actually like me and care for me, not out of some kind of obligation or dread. Not a savior, a supporter.
“If we commit to doing better, and being careful in engaging in sensitive conversations that we’re new to, and also just be willing to learn, we’ve got a lot going for us in that regard” Now THAT is simple and actionable. Thanks for the perspective 🙏
As a "homie", I fell into some of those traps when I was younger. I grew up in a predominantly Black town and am a minority myself as a bisexual trans man. I'm also married to a Black woman whom I've been with for 12 years. I distinctly remember when I started being seen as "part of the community" and not just a white friend. When I was younger, I was so stuck in what it meant to *me* to be part of that community, that I forgot what it meant to the community for me to be there. There were times where white people would say things around me, or I'd witness something and I couldn't let it go. I saw it as an attack on the people I loved. The people who loved me. I reacted to these things with vehement rejection, blind to the privileges that allowed me to voice such vehemence without the same fear of reprisal. I still have these moments, but my wife definitely helps keep it in check. Some of it is that's just who I am. When people step up against the trans community that I have a call to since birth, I can't abide that shit either, but I've learned to temper it as I've gotten older. It's rarely about me. And unless I can use relative privilege to give other people the platform they're denied, I've learned to stop making my loved ones' lives harder.
@ To me, there's a difference between ally and advocate. Im not saying allies have no value, they do--however their purpose and how they execute social justice is only a first step. An ally will engage with speaking out and actively addressing issues that they encounter that harms marginalized identities when the situation arises. Calling someone out for telling a racist or homophobic joke. Speaking out about the disparities of a targeted group. This is helpful, however, it doesn't dig deep. Thiis why I feel being an ally is not enough for breaking the wheel and why so many want to jump on the ally wagon. It's only catching situations as they come. They're moments. They're buckets of opportunities that allow us to speak out, and make an impact--but, honestly, it is only individual--it doesn't address systemic issues that perpetuate the harm. That is also why many of us get it wrong. Individual level "feels" more attainable, cathartic and helps us feel like "Hey! I'm not like the others. Im part of the change!" But that feeling is about ourselves. It's a pat on our back and a way to somehow distance ourselves from other bad actors without major risk to our place in cis-het white supremacy machine. This doesn't help break any gears. I think that is where the advocate/activist comes in--they are the individuals who are in it for the long haul. They are the "homie" that actually is attuned to their privilege and use it not just when an incident occurs, but maintains a continued effort towards dismantling a systemic issue with others even at the risk of losing out. They believe that solidarity is what dismantles oppressive systems, not trying to be a savior. They've learned (probably the hard way like I did) when to step up and when the STFU and step back. They have made a conscious decision to disrupt the system they actually benefit from. It's not uncommon for advocates and activists who have lost their marriage, or their job, or even cut off from some family members--which is a risk when you tackle the system. People have to be real--to a lot of us, losing benefits from not being complicit in the system is really scary, and I think that's where we see the "what's an easy fix so I can feel like I've done my part?" There is no easy fix--unless you choose performative BS. And the communities you work with deserve more than that. The hard work is in the long haul, educating yourself, decentering yourself and the dominant identities, and always remembering the first rule: First, do no harm. I ran into your channel by following Khadijah Mbowe and I'm really glad I did! I have now become a faithful subscriber. Congrats on your sponsorship and get some apple cider vinegar and dish soap for those fruit flies.
Yes, that makes sense. I think I get what you're saying about these considerations, and the distinction between ally and advocate. I can see the real qualitative difference there that people would do well to recognize.
The saviour ally part reminded me so much of how in movies and tv-series featuring crime and victims of crime and trauma basically end when the story of the saviour, the protagonist ends, they saved the victims from the perps, from the abusers, monsters but the victims story is far from over, they'll have to live with the traumas and the longterm effects of the crime but there is no interest to show that part as the protagonist's story has ended. That has always felt exploitative with how such media in essence "create" trauma victims for the amusements and thrills of an audience. Not sure where I'm going with this but it felt related with how in the end when the saviour think they're done the victims, the disadvantaged groups still have to live with it all, in it all.
It's always grinded my gears whenever us Americans are talking about issues in our country, and a white person from another country butts in and tries to gloat, mock and make fun of our issues when their own country hasn't even begun to pinpoint their racism problem. At this point, I've just gotten used to outsiders watching us for entertainment and to sling mud at us and not because they actually care about the cause.
My best friend used to work with a German who loved to decry American racism. Her father had served with Das Reich (yes, that Das Reich) and his opinions of Jews, the Poles, the French, all came down intact. Racism is not the problem of any one nation.
see the things that bothers me the most is that people from here (Italy in my case) don't really care about this stuff because they like to think that only the US "has a historical racism problem" and so it's their problem to solve, while we elect politicians who want "illegal immigrants who steal our jobs" out of the country and ALSO not providing them, or anyone who is really poor and COINCIDENTALLY either from North/Central Africa or Middle-Eastern countries, a living wage, housing and education. Trust me, our universities are whiter than the marble they are built with.
@@jossaccountofmadnessandmem1844 ok, there is a difference between racism and xenophobia. América is drowning in racism, you can't really compare the refugee crisis of Europe to any problem the USA has, take into account that people didn't allow black and White citizens to share a bathroom till 1964, very different situation.
How to be an ally: just be a good friend, do as you would hope your best friend would do for you, and don't be confrontational, but make it known you're aware of what's going on and you are disappointed. It's sad you have to call that an ally, but here we are, having to construe being an ally with being a good friend
Not sure it’s same as being a good friend.. I can be a good friend without interrogating my own biases and conditioning, by being on their “side”, like that’s the “homie” right? Ally ship shouldn’t be based on receiving friendship in return, it’s about social bonds to ppl you don’t have any person bonds to, sometimes over your bonds with your friends. That requires regular humility and continuous self deconstruction. Friendships can often re-affirm your worth and self perception rather than challenge it. So yea, think there’s a difference 🤷🏻
@@Pandemonius88 Ooh yes, well said. You can be or have a good friend who gives you the things you want emotionally and cares about you. Being an ally requires the effort to really look at their marginalized identity or identities (asking questions respectfully or doing research to learn more), unlearning your unconscious/internalized biases and reprogramming those to be a more sensitive friend and person. But a good friend to a marginalized person should be an ally or be working on it.
@@Pandemonius88 on a superficial level, yes. I can see how you're right. However, what kind of friend would I be if I only cared about how I interacted with them. I mean, you're objectively correct if all I cared about was how we interacted with each other. When with friends of color, or loved ones(my ex fiance, who I'm close with still), you start to notice shit and you ask questions. I think anyone with a reasonable sense of humanity in my position wouldn't consider yourself just an ally, but a good friend to the cause too. The way I see it, an ally just fights with you, but has no personal vestment in the matter. One of my best friends, my cousin, my previously mentioned ex, several childhood friends, and my band teacher would all have to mean less to me in order to be an ally. It's not only the solipsistic nature of human interaction, I genuinely care about their well beings, as well as being upset about what they have to go through. That goes deeper than just being an ally. I get what you're saying, but for me to call myself an ally is for me to deny myself of an entire life's worth of close personal relationship to say "I'm still with you", when I always was. It's personally demeaning, in my case, in my opinion. And please don't think I'm being pretentious about it, I just feel like maybe there needs to be a different word other than "Ally" for the white people who literally grew up at, or around the cookout, you know? I'm by no means saying that people in my shoes understand that struggle, but I can say that I've known about it longer then it's been recognized as a problem, and I've been called defamatory names by white people by my association with people I just considered to be "friends". So being told what I am, and am not, is a bit demeaning. This is the culture I literally grew up in, I don't know anything else. My friend are my friends, I love who I love, and I'm a product of my environment. I can't change my proximity just because it's now a national issue. I always was a friend first, and I spoke out when I needed to in public, but i am always a friend first.
@@DrJellyFanguzzz "but for me to call myself an ally is for me to deny myself of an entire life's worth of close personal relationship" - Why? I'm not sure why you recognise inter-personal relationships and allyship as mutually exclusive. Allyship is a political designation (AFAIK), your personal relationships are irrelevant to it. You are an ally solely because of the societal position you hold (i.e. white) in relation to the 'cause' (i.e. black liberation). However much your upbringing was 'around the cookout' doesn't change that societal position. It's a broad term that bears no meaning on your personal relationships or your motivations. Perhaps a more interesting question is "what does 'ally' mean to you?" (just food for thought).
Love the point about needing to be flexible and able admit fault. I wonder how social media impacts the ability to do that, a lot of our political discourse these days takes place online, and it's probably a lot harder to listen when you are addicted to getting thumbs up notifications and able to cultivate an echo chamber.
"First sponsor is not Raid Shadow Legends" had me rolling in tears 💀😂. Congrats on your first sponsor, one that is meaningful. Love your videos man, they help me explain my thoughts being a black man to my friends. Keep up the great work and I appreciate the videos.
your videos do a great job approaching challenging topics and offering people genuine education while still making sure to maintain empathy and understanding as the speaker. Hope you keep doing well on here
Hi, for some reason youtube started recommending your videos to me, some random white chick from Brazil, so I'm definitively not invited for the cookout. I like to listen to my black friends' perspectives and do the best I can to be a good ally. idk if I'm doing it right, but I like to listen to what my friends have to say: it isn't up to me to decide what should be said, but them. And this is why I believe that channels like yours are very important. Thank you for putting this out here.
It's a dumb nitpick but you mixed up Alexandre Dumas with his dad Thomas-Alexandre Dumas. The point still stands of course since his dad was able to become a General in the French Army precisely because his father was a French nobleman who took him from Haiti to France to be educated.
I caught this because I'm in middle of reading "The Black Count", a biography of General Dumas. His story really does show how the lofty ideals of equality that fueled the French Revolution clashed with the oppressive reality of Europe and its colonies during that time
I feel as though the partner role is the most beneficial placing in “allyship” due to the equal footing and common ground goals they have. I enjoy the content wholeheartedly.
As an Xennial, I find it frustrating to talk to Gen-Z folks about marginalized communities, especially LGBTQ+. A lot of that comes from the fact that I lived through worse times for the community, and I have shit I still need to unpack from living through the 90s and early 00s. On one hand, their baseline hopefulness that things will progress is encouraging. On the other hand, I've experienced so many periods of backlash that it's hard to not be cynical about their outlook.
This is the best explanation I've seen in a while of the types of *allyship. I'm reminded of what a gay friend once said- "you don't get to call yourself an ally. If we see you as an ally, we will call you one." And seriously, if you have a need to label yourself an ally, you probably aren't one because you're making it about you. Allyship is an action, not an adjective.
Interesting acknowledgment that Robert is just a kid. I saw his videos pop up in my recs and I watched a few, and my biggest take away is "oh, this is a kid". I don't think what he says is completely without value, but I'll be more interested to see where he is on ten years from now after he has a lot more life experience.
Speaking as one of them, I think the current generation both in and just leaving college is in a similar boat. Lots of very upset, motivated, and intelligent individuals that want to see real change where it matters, but right now are bereft of real-world experience needed to make that impact.
thank you! there's so much to think about. i'm autistic and before i knew that, it was too easy to go from 1 to 10 on topics i was passionate about, i definitely was being a savior. it's still hard to fight that impulse, but it's getting easier. communication has always been hard for me, i cry easy or my selective mutism kicks in, but transitioning this conversations to more text based has helped me slow down a little bit and get something coherent out.
Fantastic sponsors! I went to the "How to be an Ally" Virtual Summit with my workplace - would highly recommend. This video added a lot more depth for me on how to stop gatekeeping, be ok with being uncomfortable and wrong, and continuing to listen and strive to be a better ally. Really enjoy your videos and I'm looking forward to the next ones!
Thank you so much! I’m definitely a homie to the Latino community in my area. I grew up in a diverse neighborhood, am “conditionally” white as a white Latino, and have adopted a lot of Latino culture even though I was raised by a white mother and learned Spanish as a teenager/adult. I never heard the term ally until the last few years and thought the idea was odd considering my position. I’m like, just be kind to folks and recognize that racial injustice is real and pervasive in our society. What’s all this talk about allies?! That being said, I get defensive when I’m made aware of my privilege and certain aspects of my identity are surely an attempt to overcompensate for my “homie” status. Thanks again! I just started watching your videos! Love them.
Before I press the start button... Hollywood portrayal of being an Ally: The Help Blind Side Green Bulls*#t Book Me: How NOT to be an Ally: Chapter1: The Help Blind Side Green B🤢 ( sorry threw up a lil bit.....) I am still mentally scared by both 😩couldn’t do the Green one- trailer was good enough 😬😬😬 Congratulations on the sponsor!!!
F.D - The way you talk and present information, as well as your general demeanor and wholesome character are things that I wish I had discovered years ago on youtube. I'm so happy you popped into my feed. Thanks for all that you do and keep on keeping on.
Wow, I hadn't thought about the fact that those saviour movies are more about them than the marginalised group/individual, but as soon as you pointed it out, it about smacked me in the face!! The point that solutions are systemic rather than individual is another thing that I hadn't thought about. Thanks for educating me 🙂
I think about that The Legend of Aang's scene with Iroh alot when thinking about allyship: Zuko asks his uncle and one of the strongest firebenders, Iroh, to finish his brother(Zuko's father) and end the reign of terror. Iroh being the figure of wisdom throughout the show replies with somehing like "Even if i could do that, imagine what it would mean for history: the war didn't end at all, the world only saw brothers killing eachother for political power". Of course it's not in a racial matter, but i think the message is about how we must be carefull of our actions when we make dificult and deep decisions like these. If your acts of "allyship" only benefit yourself, a privileged person who is part of the problem, how can they help the ones who are strugglin'? The only ones who benefit with a image of "privileged savior" are the privileged ones themselves. Sorry for the bad english.
This is so powerful and so true. A slightly different circumstance, but I’ve seen so many people treat being my friend as almost an accolade…And they often don’t even confront the homophobic/transphobic tendencies they have when referring to other queer people…they think that just because they’re my friend that they’re actively saying they’re not hateful towards lgbtq+ individuals but will be the same folks that literally try to mandate how others should express their gender/sexuality…it’s wild and really sad how a lot of allies in the savior category don’t actually see that rather than being a good person they’re actually actively making the community members uncomfortable for the sake of not being seen as a bigot/hateful…
I was really stoked to hear you talk about Blindspotting. As soon as you mentioned the Homie, Miles was the first character to come to my mind. I love your work; I appreciate your reminders that there are no easy answers.
i felt really called out by the segment about "feeling right." and that's good, btw. ive got a lot to think about. especially about how i relate to both these issues, and the people that i conceptualize in my head as the enemy. i really appreciate this channel. thanks for calling me out.
"Am I really an ally" is so real. Like it's not enough to just understand racism, i have to back it up with actions. What am I doing? Is it enough? Can it ever be enough?
I think a big thing surrounding the three ally archetypes is agency. While the homie has about the same amount, and the partner has a little bit more agency than the POC character, the savior holds most, if not all of the agency. Backing up to allow marginalized groups to strategize and make their own plans is a crucial aspect of being an ally. Knowing when to duck out is just as important as knowing when to take action
The Summit has three tiers. Starting at 149.99 US Dollars which grants you access to recordings of the sessions. For an additional $50, you can attend the virtual summit. For $250, you can attend the virtual summit and are given access to "all session recordings".
I have to say, this video was really hard for me to watch as a white person who believed I was a good ally. Thank you for calling me on my shit and teaching me how to put actions to my words Also I'm so happy for you to get your first sponsorship!
I would love to see a good movie with a subversion of the white savior trope that illuminates the issues you talk about here. It's such a bad trope that makes a lot of bad movies, even if they're well-cast and well-produced. But it'd probably need to have a "bad" ending, and people usually dislike that. You are right that _Blindspotting_ did a good job with that dynamic and was generally just really good.
@@bloodgain It could be they're referring to Rose (the girlfriend). She put a great deal of effort into looking performatively woke, to the point of confronting a police officer and telling him off for his racism. Then it turns out it was not only a performance, but a subtle excuse to keep Chris's ID out of the local PD system so he can't be tracked down. And, obviously, she turns out to be one of the racist antagonists all along. I get what D Z means by the suggestion, but I'd still like a film where it gets dressed down more specifically.
love the shirt - fake allyship is temporary, wu tang is forever.
@Barry white liberalism is weak af… wu tang clan is nuthin to fuck wit 😎
Wuuuuuu Taaaaaang!!!!
System of a Down x Wu Tang collab is my kind of allyship
@@Nuvizzle oh shit, I didn't know that existed! Gonna check it after this video!
@@Nuvizzle I always thought I was the only one who heard that. Then again, all my friends but one have no idea who System are.
“Along with my first sponsor!” Immediate tears.
And what a great sponsor, perfect for the vid “and most importantly stay out of my DMs” 😂😂😂😂
YEEESSSSSSSS!!!!!
And it’s not a mobile game app or skill share lol
*sniff* they grow up so fast
😂 Love the honesty. ❤️
The stuff about Schultz and Europeans trying to distance themselves from Americans is pretty confronting, as a Dutch person. White progressives in the Netherlands love to criticize the US about the murder of George Floyd and to post black squares, but when it's december and our blackface tradition comes along again, lots of them are a lot less outspoken. This is very deeply rooted in our culture, where in history class we get taught more about slavery in the US then about slavery in the Dutch Antilles or Indonesia. In the media, there is more focus on racial issues in the US then in our own country and when we think of the civil rights movement, we think about Martin Luther King instead of the people who fight for racial justice here at home.
As a Dutch white guy trying to help marginalized communities, but inhabiting mostly white communities myself, it's a constant process of learning but also mostly of unlearning. Which is why these kinds of videos are very valuable. Thanks a lot!
Thank you for being aware. Keep pushing. It helps.
That's the most progressive thing I've heard a white Dutch person say. It's often, we're not as racist as the Americans meanwhile negating their country's history and wealth came from building slave ships and having overseas colonies. But yeah, lets focus solely on the Americans instead of looking inward.
Thank you for sitting with that uneasiness and actually looking at it in the face.
Very well said Sir 💯👀👍🎯
Same, the only historical contribution to racist oppression we get taught in school as far as I remember is the role of the VOC and especially WIC in goods made through slavery and directly in slave trade and how it led up to what we call 'the golden age' of wealth.
Since there still appears to be less overt racism in the Netherlands it's often difficult to relate content from the US to our situation. But as you said the analysis of Schultz was nevertheless incredibly helpful in emphasising the need for us to look at our own sphere of influence. For example advocating for making Keti Koti, the abolishment of slavery, a national holiday (Sinterklaas seems to be losing to Christmas anyway so might as well replace a blackface holiday with the exact opposite).
Every thing you have said is on point. Living in The Netherlands for over 30 years and counting I find many Dutch use passive/aggressive tactics when it comes to issues of race. They tend to speak/act as if they are the expert, especially on issues of race. I've had many try to tell me all about racial issues as they pertain to America because they've read/ heard all about it, while totally dismissing my having been born and raised as Black in America. As for Dutch racism, it's very nuanced in its applications and often is passed off as naivete about those they see as "other". Funny thing, not really is how as a Western Black I'm treated as a "unicorn" until I point out their hypocritical treatment of non-western Black and PoC, then they go on the offensive.
"Starting fires in communities they don't live on behalf of people who don't want them there" that is it right there. The biggest issue with allies is when that instinct to overcorrect drowns out the words and actions of the marginalized people they're ostensibly there for! Thank you for really laying all this out
Damn straight.
I’m glad that other people have seen blindspoting
Yeah "de wypipo" are the ones who came and burned your neighborhoods in 2020...you know the wypipo put on blackface to loot stores and shoot up Chicago every weekend just to ruin your reputation! Them awful wypipo! :D
The only people I’ve ever heard say or post “acab” are white kids who’ve never had a bad experience with law enforcement.
“Perfection in allyship is not your goal, allyship is your goal” a bar
“Being an ally should never be about *you*. “
Just wanna say you’re my favorite creator and I’ve learned a lot from you during my insomniac phases.
@3g0st oh you’re absolutely right. I just meant that I spent a lot of time binging this particular channel last month when I was having trouble sleeping. I do try to consume as much of this type of content as possible (day or night) and have for a while. I just became a big fan of these BMBs in the last month or so :)
this part! it's why i've always rolled my eyes seeing white twitter social justice warriors. It is for their ego, it's about their follower and like count. Overall I think it's a poor platform for social justice just because of all the misinformation that can easily spread, and that 90% of the tweets on racial discussions on that platform are driven by ego & recognition on the platform, instead of actually helping ppl. Not to say there aren't any good ones, but unfortunately the ppl who garner the most attention are usually white, or they are black ppl looking to build their social media presence.
Haha I also go down holes of video essays during my insomnia phases~
Insomnia club!!!
Although this subject is not new to me as I live in it; I concur. Watching at 4ish am. I need 😴
So personally I feel like I’m in an odd situation. I’m an indigenous kid from the Navajo Nation and now that I’ve left my state for college I feel like I’ve definitely felt this ally issue, but mainly from other marginalized people’s. I still have white friends, but rarely have we gone into topics like this. Where I mostly have these talks about allyship are with my politically active Black and Hispanic friends who want to help/discuss my community’s issues but often don’t quite understand the specifics or simply just compare it to theirs. Since I’ve left home, I’ve learned and I get that a lot of people (especially ones that grew up in urban and suburban areas) don’t have much experience with Native Americans or the culture in general. It’s just a bit awkward at times because it often feels like sometimes people think that just because they’re invited to the Cookout that means they also get a free pass to the Pow Wow. They’re definitely similar, and we’re all stronger together than apart, but there’s nuances and it’s important not to project your own experiences on other groups.
I’m optimistic though and I believe most of this awkwardness just stems from the fact that we’re young and still figuring these things out. I think as we keep talking and learning from one another we’ll grow to understand and support each other in better ways.
That sounds like an important aspect of allyship to consider: the diversity present and another aspect of the flexibility and humility that needed in order to participate.
I'm interested to hear more about what you're saying so I'm betting that these folks would also appreciate to understand the nuances as well. They won't know unless you tell them. If they're already speaking the language maybe they can learn some new words. Metaphor! Lol good luck!
Oh I feel this as an Indigenous person too (apihtawikosisan)! I'm in the tech field and in Canada (so it's a bit different), but still there seems to be such a disconnect. There's almost this super big discomfort. Maybe it's because they have to reposition themselves as being complicit in the systems of Indigenous oppression and that can be a hard mental shift. Like they have to go from being the one who has/needs allies to being the one who needs to be an ally.
Wow. This was such a powerful revelation for me.
@@AMortifyingOrdeal I can confirm there's a big discomfort with being complicit in a system of oppression that I'm also not intended to benefit from. That's a complex issue and I have lots to learn. Thanks for your posts.
What Justin said about being a real ally really resonated. My (white bougie) parents moved to the South in 1961 to be a part of the civil rights movement - my Episcopal minister Dad worked with MLK's group, the SCLC, through the 60s & early 70s. Some 40 years later, I asked him what that was like.
His answer: God sent me to Memphis to teach me humility.
Well in my opinion the human race was lucky to have your father for the simple fact humans can be one of two things: dedicated to following a moral code tied to the concept of equality, or unable to see the world through any other vantage point besides their own. It’s clear which side your father chose to join and I salute him as well as every other white person from that era who knew things were wrong and took action to change it. Full stop. Theres plenty of gray area related to some “allies” and their true motivations for why they allegedly support the causes they claim to support, but there’s also a large subset of people who realize their individual impact may be minimal yet don’t let that stop them from calling out hypocrisy and hate in their own family/friend networks. If we’re going to make any meaningful changes in terms of race, it’s got to happen at a local level like the Avon cosmetics business model. As opposed to the Walmart/big box store model of pursuing true equality… which is essentially “do nothing, but come up with catchy slogans and campaigns involving posting a black screen on social media”.
I want to see this channel become so huge that the cookout disclaimer becomes the standard intro.
Excellent comment and I'm honored to be the 69th like
The Savior irl is scary because it's so conditional and so self serving. That's why I have major issues with a lot of religious charities and "good works". A lot (not all but a lot) of the work is about getting the worker into heaven, not actually helping anyone
I find it disingenuous at best and insidious at worst. Not to mention it's incredibly patronizing at any level
Message!
My god
Here in Brazil the church prey on poor and drug addicts for "rehabilitation", then send them to enter for free in random bus, ask for the money of the ticket and then ask for money for their "charity"
Is a brainwashing camp, a cult, and i saw so many doing this on the pandemic, it was infuriating
No mask, passing their cheap products arround the hands of the passengers and praying for the bus
Truth.
Would you consider a figure like John Brown a white savior? Because I don’t think he’s a “homie” because he didn’t become an abolitionist because he grew up in the same community as enslaved Blacks. He could just be an ally, but he is a very important ally as his martyrdom helped push other whites into actively dismantling the south and the institution of slavery. I am bias towards the story of John Brown as my family is from Kansas and he is a pivotal figure in both the Black and White communities in our little home town.
However I cannot see John Brown doing everything he did because of his pride, or the cathartic feeling it gave him, he was a believer.
@@Zom13y I think Malcom X literally called John Brown the only real white ally.
"You're an ally if you feel something".
This statement hit hard. My workplace had a Truth and Reconciliation meeting the other day, and while I think it's a good thing it happened, a lot of it seemed focused on how *everyone* was feeling and at the end of the meeting the corporate representative joined chat with tears in her eyes and I wondered how many people on the call were going to go away satisfied they had 'done enough' because they felt bad about a thing and that must make them good people.
It reminds me too of a portion in the book called 'The English Passengers' by Matthew Kneale where one of the characters, a kid in Tasmania thinks he's finally making progress getting aid for the plight of his people because some of the rich colonists are taking up his cause, but he realizes on meeting them at a fancy garden party, they're not concerned with him or his troubles, they're mostly concerned with their own pain and feeling like they've done something to help, even if at the end of the day they've just turned someone else's issue into a pantomime of socially acceptable virtue for their own emotional catharsis.
Been really enjoying your videos, always leaves me with a lot to think about.
people say all the time when they get their feelings hurt “i was trying to be an ally but now..” etc. and if anything so petty and personal could turn you away from being an “ally” then you were never an “ally” to begin with.
When you were talking about the "Savior" ally it kept reminding me of the Manic Pixie Dream Girl trope. Where a female character, despite being a primary character, often is used to only move the narrative of the male lead. The value of the plot and any growth is never really in her benefit. Her history, dreams, and struggles are shallow and only there to frame what the male lead needs in order for them to make some break through.
Thats generally the case because the movie isnt about the manic pixie dram girl. Its about the lost and confused dude. The story is about him, not her.
@@aureateseigneur5317 yeah, and saviour movies are about the saviour and not the people they're "saving"
here's just a reminder to (re)watch 500 Days of Summer, which beautifully subverts that manic pixie dream girl trope :)
@@DS-wp2dj Yea thats gebnerally how that works. Thats why it says SUPERMAN on the poster and not LOIS LANE. Its about Superman.
@@aureateseigneur5317 Yes, but the point is that when it's a movie about a male character saved by a female lead, at least saved in a more conceptual, not so literal sense, the focus shifts back to the male lead. So the "savior" becomes the secondary character in these movies.
not to be dramatic or anything but seeing the notification for this upload just made my week
I LOVE YOUR VIDS!
Hi Yhara Love Your Videos
SAME!!!!!
It brings me joy that you follow each other. Great creators supporting each other.
frickin love your videos
As a trans lesbian, thank you for always bringing the intersectionality up constantly in these video. The savior type is a huge problem in the LGBT community. They mean well but they pick fights with the conservative types that they are not prepared to fight nor should fight at all and it ends up just giving people like Ben Shapiro fodder to spread their hate and say "look how ridiculous these LGBT people are". In the end it just does more harm than good 99% of the time. This video really help put into words why those types are bad for me
I see this shit all the time lol nothing worse than seeing someone argue your opinion when they don't know what the fuck they're talking about
Hell yes. This exact dynamic is what made the saga following Vaush's jab at J.K. Rowling so irritating. Like, bruh, you're being asked to back off. That should be enough.
Also, love the pfp, that's a great template
That and the paternalistic talking over us when we're in the room, and telling us what's in our best interests and what we shouldn't be worried about.
That's always a problem when moralism rather than empathy becomes the motivating factor for activists.
❤️
RE: fruit flies, putting bowls of vinegar covered in Saran wrap with holes in every room coupled with dumping boiling water down every drain twice a day is cheap and reliable. After 2-3 days the number of flies buzzing around will be hugely reduced and after a week your roommate will leave rotten bananas out on the table for banana bread that will never get made and they'll all be back. Works every time.
I specifically recommend apple cider vinegar, and to add a drop of dish soap to it. Apple cider vinegar smells like rotting fruit to the flies, causing them to fly in and land, but the soap breaks the surface tension so the flies sink and drown.
yeah - fruitflies pretty much go away entirely if you remove their open foodsources
their lifespan is so short, that they just die off on their own if they cant reproduce
so make sure your trashcan is fairly well closed off and your trashbags are watertight (i once had stuff from the trashbag dripping to the bottom of the bin which was an excelent breeding ground)
dont leave food (especially fruit) out in the open
and empty out your trash somewhat regularily - another time i had issues with fruitflies, i was using a massive trashcan that i rarely needed to empty out...which gave the buggers plenty time to breed in there
that should mostly take care of the issue
@@AmandaDavis6130 THIS! worked WONDERS for me.
"Being an ally should never be about you."
PREACH!
You hit the nail on the head when you said the ally often uses the marginalized group to virtue signal that they are different but then it becomes politicized and peeps from the suburbs come into the marginalized communities to start havoc and it's painfully obvious that these two peeps are talking to each other and are using the marginalized group as a conduit to air their grievances. You and that interviewed gentleman put into words things I've felt but didn't know how to say. Thank you thank you thank you.
"Being an ally should never be about you.”
Have mixed feelings on this
On one hand it makes sense that allyship needs to be about the cause and the end goal not just for your benefit or issues
but i find it debilitating to say it shouldn’t be about you in any capacity, when you may be the one putting your life, health, and the life and health of your family or others in danger by following the cause.
@@mckenzie.latham91
Your life is about you. The political cause and the political conversation isn't. No one's saying that you don't matter as an individual with individual experiences, just that those individual experiences don't substitute or supersede systemic issues nor should they be treated as the same thing in a political sense. That applies to both negative and positive personal experiences, you can have a conversation about yourself and your life but it's just not gonna be on the same level as a political conversation about systems.
Talking about how Schultz didn't recognize the danger he was putting Django in reminded me of a scene in Black Boy when Wright is working at some kind of store and a white man comes in and wanting to prove himself a "good" white person he attempts to tip Wright $1 for his help. Wright refuses the tip which upsets the white man and he explains that if the other whites saw him accept the $1 he could lose his job or possibly even be killed.
That really opened my eyes to how even if I think I'm doing a nice thing, I might not understand the ramifications that a more marginalized person might experience.
This comment brings to mind the problems with giving certain things to unhoused people. Like you don't think of the fact that depending on what you give them, people can become a target for violence just for that thing that you may not even be thinking much of.
@@Blu939 Definitely. A charity publically giving a poor household in a dangerous neighborhood a simple $100 check could make them targets. Being a "candy lady" eventually gets you robbed now matter how old and sweet you may be. Sending your child to school with too much money/jewelry.
No good deed goes unpunished in the hood please remember that!
@@Blu939 As a previously homeless person this is true. Unsealed food is thrown away because people poison us. Water bottles are dense and not worth carrying around most of the time due to weight. Having a nice new jacket might last a day. Being offered money might erode the last shred of pride we have left. The ONLY thing you should be doing with homeless people is asking them if they need anything, or reading the signs they hold up. Don't guess. Let them tell you what they would like from you. It's easy and free, and you might save a life that very day.
@@Queer_Nerd_For_Human_Justice People act like homeless people aren’t suffering because they don’t wanna get poisoned.
@@Queer_Nerd_For_Human_Justicehow are you
In my experience as a queer woman, I agree that humility and willingness to make sacrifices (even small ones) are what make a real ally. Being able to listen, reflect on your own bias, and take your cues from actual marginalized people separates those who are here to help others and those who are here to help themselves. And if you can't risk even a tiny transgression or contribute real resources to the cause then you are, from a practical standpoint, useless to it.
Underrated comment
While I was watching this, my local barista, young white girl, saw my phone and said “I love FD!” and we talked for 10 minutes about our favorite videos and the work you’re putting into the world. Thank you for what you do. 👏🏻
Your videos are such a sobering experience for a cis white dude like myself, thinking I was some sort of proper ally. You really illustrate the fallacy of white liberalism as using allyship simply to pat ourselves on the back as opposed to addressing the very real and arduous journey of facing systemic oppression for the long term. How we paint ourselves as some sort of heroes when in reality the most we could do is humble ourselves and our flawed perspectives to at least attempt to comprehend the struggle of those marginalized instead of thinking we can fix it overnight. True allyship is about taking the spotlight off of ourselves and become a sidekick to those who understand it better. Thank you
For sure. That humility and openness to listening to other people's experiences, and really listening when someone from the community we're trying to be an ally to tells us a way in which we're participating and supporting a system that harms them--and also not getting caught up in feeling guilty or hurt when we find that out--which would center our own feelings and experiences again--and instead just trying to competently listen and try to understand what we can do to try to remove support for that system.
I'm not sure "sidekick" feels like the best word to me, though. It's a rare sidekick that possesses more powers in a situation (living in a white supremacist culture, being given the benefit of the doubt in more situations) than the main character. But I think I get the non-centered, team-player vibe I think you were going for.
And absolutely the "not overnight" thing. I think that's what hardest for a lot of white people to comprehend: that white supremacy is ingrained, the harms and inequity are entrenched in our social institutions and communities...that racial justice in this country is a long way off, and that there's generations of work to be done--that's a hard sell for people who don't have to feel like they don't have any skin in the game.
A hard thing to hear from the black people who I know was hearing them say that the reaction to George Floyd's death probably wasn't going to change very much. I was so hopeful that America had reached some kind of turning point, and many of them were quite skeptical that any real substantive change was going to happen at all. That was so horrifying, I wanted to believe that any decent human being would be changed by seeing that. It was a lesson in how much black people have had to learn to live with in this country for so long. Outrage is something that can be felt, and is easy, but commitment, and follow-through, being willing to actually learn and practice differently, and a lifetime of making decisions differently is not. I really appreciate his videos too, man. These really help me to understand.
I wish there was more TH-camrs like him but for Brazilians
We have similar problems to the US but they aren't the same and i think there is literally only one channel radicalizing people and no minoritie's channels
@@plaguedoctorjamespainshe6009 just interested what channel is that?
@@jasonmorales3305 Meteoro Brasil
agreed 100%
Oh damn. I’ve been like “man, I love making Republicans angry,” but what’s the point of that if, like, shit’s not going to change. Cool. I’m going to go self-reflect. Thank you. Like a ton.
We need to change society beyond conservatives. They will neve help.
Came to this realization a few years ago when my trans friend posted something along the lines of "I wish cis allies would put as much effort into making trans people feel loved and supported as they do trying to piss off TERFs" and that really made me realize how toxic that kind of behavior is, not just when it comes to trans issues
I think the other problem is conservatives and reactionaries will always find something to blame. Marginalized groups can do what conservatives say, and conservatives will say they did it wrong. Or they can ignore conservatives and the conservatives will say they're thugs. Damned if you do, damned if you don't. So why bother engaging with them at all? There's nothing you can do to change their minds, they have to fix that on their own. Engaging with them on social media or in public only platforms them and validates they're worth talking to.
I dunno. Obviously, you can't ignore them completely because they block you at every path. Maybe we should just be better at how we choose our battles.
@@junjiito6298 It's not the conservatives you need to change. It's the liberals. They treat black people like children, and there's a fair number of black people that eat that crap up.
Thank you lmao
As a white guy I was really humbled when a guy at my job was being discriminated against and showed way more grace than I wanted to with the situation. Following his lead I stayed clam, and ended up being able to see a lot more racism in our workplace, against him and others. I played my role and a lot of managers ended up saying things either directly too me or within earshot that could be reported, and were. Lots of the managers ended up leaving the store due to the constant write ups and the whole store ended up closing a few months after all this came to light, thankfully most people had already moved on or barely needed the job anyway.
I remember being forced to read "to kill a mockingbird" in school. And I remember needing to write a paper how you feel about it. I HATE that book. I know it was good for the times, or whatever, but they're so many better stories for black lives. Heck, it's not even about the white savior it was about his kids. I remember going into detail how it was boring and why I hated the characters etc, and after my teacher drowned it in red ink, because I wasn't giving the white savior trope any room to breathe. She did not like perspective as a black girl
I personally like the book and believe it was really well written but damn, as long as the critique was constructive the teacher should've been more willing to see another perspective. Academia way too often neuders the effectiveness of older media by refusing to create any discussion on it. I think it's a good book but it's just mindnumbingly boring when you're just being told how and why to enjoy something. The author herself would've likely been more interested in such critique. I feel like this happens a ton in white culture; once counterculture becomes accepted it's blindly praised; often being treated separately to the time period it was created in and it looses the meaning it once held and the lesson it can currently provide.
@@randomguyontheinternet7940 I will say the trial was by far the most interesting and well done. However the rest of the book for me wasn't entertaining. There just wasn't enough there for me to actually care about the kids. Especially when there's a innocent person being framed for something he didn't do.
"Allyship is more than the catharsis you get by doing the right thing." Dude, i mean come on, I don't know you're able to distill complex ideas into hard-hitting single sentences like that!
I know conversations like this should never be boiled down to punchy one-liners, but damn it's still impressive when you punctuate a well argued point with a fucking fire line.
Honestly these are the sound bites we need on the left. American leftists have always sucked at coming up with "marketable" messaging and we suffer for it.
"the catharsis you get by doing the right thing.”
That’s the reason the vast majority of anyone, black, white, hispanic, asian etc. etc. ever do the right thing
pretending like the majority of people do the right thing for any other reason than personal or some form of selfish means is wishful thinking.
Very few, if not incredibly rare breeds of people who do what they do for 100% altruistic means is one out of every ten million etc. etc
that’s why so few of these figures have ever existed in history and why they are such outliers among the masses.
@Mckenzie .Latham Stop being so naive and reductive, no one here is saying anything close to what you're straw-manning, reality is far more complicated and bleak than what you describe yet it is easy to see that people can do the right thing for any number of reasons.
Regardless treating certain people as outliers (both statistically and focusing on historical figures instead of "the masses") is neither accurate or moral.
@@goodpeople25 thank you
"shultz and candie argue, fight, kill and die over who is the least brutal oppressor, and black lives are hanging in the balance" i think every single white "ally" needs to hear this. I'm so glad khadija brought me to your channel, love your insights and thougthful analysis.
"i think every single white "ally" needs to hear this.”
I’ll remember this the next time people, try and get me to care about another black shooting, after all i better stay in my lane to not get other people caught in the crossfire guess?
again this is not saying anything
this is not telling us what to do or how to help, it’s just wagging the finger at us for our faults like we’re the only ones who have such fundamental flaws that sabotage us and others.
@@mckenzie.latham91 Come on, is that really your response to a statement like this? Your comment is an unfortunate oversimplification of what is being talked about here. I think the video clearly explains what is beneficial and what is not. Instead of buying into the ethos of the us/them mentality maybe just put more thought into what is actually being said here. Why are you getting so upset about a "group" you "belong" to being criticized? Why do you feel so offended? Is this this really a statement on your personal character or something else? Ironically, this is the embodiment of the behavior white "allies" are criticized for in this very video. Will you only "help" if you are praised for everything you do regardless of whether or not it is actually helpful? I'm not trying to make you feel bad about having an emotional reaction, really. Like F.D. commented on poignantly, this entire process takes a large degree of humility, and people need to be willing to be wrong and examine their thoughts and behaviors, which is obviously difficult for everyone. Its complicated, and that's the reason why F.D. plugged that organization, because they specifically exist to help people like you and I who may be confused as to what is productive and what is not. At the end of the day, the biggest thing that has helped me and may help you is to really think about why we viscerally react to instances of criticism, learn to separate that criticism of our broader "group" identity and carefully apply it to ourselves (think, have "I" specifically done or thought this? why/ why not? If not, then it doesn't apply to me, but what can I do better etc.) and then evaluate why it is you are trying to help ( am doing this to make myself feel better or am I doing this see tangible change?)
@@zackwalker5701 " I think the video clearly explains what is beneficial and what is not. “
It doesn’t actually, and it leaves out key context.
For example using Django Unchained,
F.D. tries to portray Shultz as a bad ally based on his actions there, which was a screw up, even Shultz himself admits it before he dies
but the point i would make is look at Shultz’s actions throughout the film
1. Frees Django from the slave line
2. Not only frees django, but also frees the other slaves, instructs them which way is north and freedom, and then advises them how to kill the surviving slaver, so that his body wont be found and they can get farther away to escape
3. takes django under his protection, teaching him to not only defend himself but gain the skills he can use to take revenge and rescue his wife later on
4. Actually agrees to help Django find his wife and tracks her down for him
5. Accompanies Django into Candy land even hutch he cannot stand Candy or the slavers hpcorsy and pretense of sophistication
(as well Prussia/Germany did not participate in the slave trade, so the line about the brutal oppressor" dick contest doesn’t even hold water)
Yes Shultz screws up at the last minute but that is because he’s not perfect and was prone to flaws, like any human being.
I think shultz can be considered a flawed ally but not a bad ally, as he is undeniably the only reason Django ever got freed and or ever found his wife, period
and yet that doesn’t factor in at all to how he was an ally...
And that’s the point, we’re expected to be allies but then when we do things that do help its ignored the moment we fail or drop the ball on one thing, and those other things just are assumed to never have happened.
It’ the same struggle that many civil rights leaders gave LBJ for taking his time on the civil rights act, even though LBJ wasn’t dragging his heels, it was cause he was doing all he could, but was having to manage his fellow Dixiecrats as well as ensuring he could get enough votes to make a veto proof legislation
and yet many POC would call him out for this as if he didn’t care and or wasn’t motivated at all, even as he was doing his job.
F.D even admits that the whole reason for that scene in Django was also to ensure the big shoot out happens, and yet people and him act like the film is portraying a bad idea even after admitting entertainment was the main goal
i even saw someone in here call out Tarintino for writing that scene despite supposedly being an ally in real life, even after the person admits that it was more for entertainment purposes.
"Will you only "help" if you are praised for everything you do regardless of whether or not it is actually helpful?”
I don’t care about praise, i just want credit where credit is due...If someone is trying to be an ally and help, even if they may screw up or fall short, it should not land them labeled a total bad ally
if they are trying to use and or benefit from the “cause” for their own personal gain, then yes, call them out
but not everyone is perfect and going to be able to be perfect in every situation you want
and i don’t think that discloses someone who generally intendeds to help or means well as not being a good ally.
Like i said Shultz screws up, but everything else he does in the film helps and benefits Django, and yet somehow that isn’t factored into him being an ally at all...
"and that's the reason why F.D. plugged that organization, “
Yeah that’s another thing i checked that organization out and i was surprised to find it’s not a non for profit, it’s a paid three day seminar, for profit organization which turns my head a bit.
@@mckenzie.latham91 No one is forcing you to be an ally or forcing you to care. If you're getting so up in your feelings about not being given credit, or being berated when you do allyship 'wrong'... then don't be an ally. Go about your business and stay out of it. The actions you're describing of Schultz are more white saviourism than allyship. He saves Django, then trains the childlike savages to rise up against their oppressors, then magnanimously gives his life killing a white man who's more racist than he is, to prove how good a white man he is. Okay. But those were his decisions. After freeing Django, he could've gone his way or helped in other ways. But he literally centred himself to death because he was so stuck on feeding his ego; Django becomes essentially a cardboard cutout in his own story, dragged into conflict when he didn't need to be, just so Schulz can be centre stage. If you want recognition for being an ally, maybe you're doing allyship for the wrong reasons. Instead of being bitter and deciding not to care, you could take a look at yourself and ask why you're so wrapped up in this ally identity. Who are you doing it for? Right now, it sounds like you're doing allyship for yourself. And because you're not being made to feel good about it, you turn on the marginalised people you claim to want to support. It's not their fault you're a shit ally, it's yours. So do something about it, or stop complaining that you're not getting adulation for being an ordinary decent human being.
I want to validate the 'homie ally' existing in the disability community. My disabled friends and I often joke about our disabilities with each other. But... Abled people who spend time with us can get too comfortable and chime in. For us these Jokes are a survival mechanism but there is no reason for them to chime in.
*This is not to center the conversation around me. I am listening. But just want to validate that phenomena existing in other communities as you mention.*
Love this video and love your work.
I've also noticed that people tend to co-opt their assistance as being something more than it really is. My sister is disabled so I've seen it plenty of times from classmates to the nurses who come in in the mornings to assist. Maybe I'm biased because this has been my life for like 23 some odd years now so I'm used to assistance being required in her situation, it's not really a big deal; but to someone who maybe doesn't have the opportunity to work with disabled people regularly it can seem a bit more monumental of a task to lend a hand with her. I dunno, I've noticed stuff like this in a lot of communities, especially in LGBT+ spaces.
Why is it suddenly not ok if an abled person makes these jokes?
What do you even mean by "survival" mechanism?
And why does your jokes supposedly being a "survival mechanism" make it no ok for other people to joke with you?
@@hoominbeeing lmao if you have to be told these things then you have zero social awareness
@@SmokeyEdits Not an argument
Thank you for agreeing with me
@@hoominbeeing i mean if you'd watch the video you're commenting on then you'd get the gist of why you shouldn't just let yourself into communities you're not a part of, it's not really anybody's job but your own to educate yourself on how to be a better person. grow the fuck up
I just want to say how much you've helped me grow and opened my eyes to thins I have done that don't correspond with being a good ally. I'm sad that it took others to hold me accountable, but regardless...thank you
'True heroism is minutes, hours, weeks, year upon year of the quiet, precise, judicious exercise of probity and care-with no one there to see or cheer. This is the world.' - The Pale King
Kinda weird that Quentin Tarantino, of all people, was able to so deftly express that flaw present in many white allies of placing his own "honor" above the well being of the people he's supposed to be helping.
I still don't know wether he did it on purpose or just thought it would make the character cooler.
@@Temudhun I think it reads as pretty clearly deliberate. Django and Brunhilda clearly just want to get out of there and go live their lives. That was the plan. And giving into his pride is clearly a grave error that could have ended with all of them dead (and Schultz does die).
Nah it wasn't on purpose. Tarantino is just a genius storyteller and knows a lot about black culture. When you're like that you just stumble upon deep insighful stuff without even trying. I'm 100% certain that Tarantino conceived Schulz as a genuine noble _selfless_ character.
@Boubouh I think it was mostly a vehicle for having a bloody climax but I also think it was intentional because they built up his difficulty reconciling his pride as a good white with “refined european tastes” and him having to play the part of a slave owner when dealing with candy
@@andreja9425 Oh yeah, if I were to guess at the writing process:
THING ONE: This plan needs to go badly so Django has to have a bloody shootout climax.
So how? Maybe theres a major slip up at a critical moment? Or just some random event that Django and Schulz couldn't foresee? No, it would be more narratively satisfying if they fuck it up... no, not Django... Schulz fucks it up. And he dies for it. So how...
I have to applaud Roberts willingness to be vulnerable and admit he was unclear on what Ally means.. I wish more people had that kind of emotional bravery.
So, this got recommended to me today, and the European moral high horse resonates so much with me, because while racism may not be as obvious and overt as in the US, it is still present.
I've been living here 30 years, one of my parents is European, and yet people are always shocked when they hear me speak the language without issues. Yesterday someone (who's known me for at least 5 years and knows that I got ALL of my schooling done here) asked me whether I got used to the climate and I was so peeved by the question that I answered "After 30 years, I don't even remember what the climate was in South America..."
People in Europe like to think that they're very open and welcoming and not racist, but they still have racism related prejudice and they don't even have the awareness to see it.
Us white left-wingers have a tendency to point at the right, and say, "Well, that's obviously where the problems stem! It's not us!" But like, no... Some of us are problematic, too.
We want to pretend like we're "helping" by not being overtly racist, but that's not enough. It's not. Be friends with black people. Listen to black people. Actually try to understand other groups of people. Not just pretending "not to see colour." We have to see it, we have to try to understand the viewpoints of people of various different backgrounds, nationalities, etc.
And individually, we've got to try to overcome any of our implicit biases. Hell, just to admit when we have them, as a start. At least.
If anything the left-wing has become the greatest recruitment tool for the right-wing.
Thank you 👏🏼
Bit obvious eh
Just be yourself. See us as individuals
The danger of "ally" as an identity is that it amounts to a majority dominant group casting themselves as one community with the marginalized groups. I think it would be best to abandon the tumblr impulse of giving everyone a special flag and identity. Allies are those who act in concert with marginalized people in specific ways to protect and promote their interests. Thus you can say that LBJ was acting as an ally when he pushed through the Civil Rights Act without worrying about the wider implications of casting him as some kind of fundamental "ally." It's situational.
Sounds about right. Allyship is something that you DO, not something that you ARE.
@@Irisverse Well put.
Plus, it gets really messy if you reduce someone to "ally". You can end up with groups that are all allies to each other, with all the complications and reductionism that implies.
And what happens when that identity of "ally" is threatened? We're all just made from very flawed matter, and few people handle an identity challenge well, their first time.
From personal experience:
Allies to the poor and mentally ill are all kinds of colors, genders, orientations, and experiences. Many of them have dealt with well meaning allies who made things worse, without that experience helping them avoid every mistake when they tried to help others.
If there's no real communication, and "allyship" is just assumed because of good intentions and good company, it almost always ends in disaster. For example, I had to learn, the hard way, as a kid raised in a racist white Hanover, PA that it worried my then girlfriend to listen to me talk about the novelty of being in an interracial relationship - was it a fetish thing? Fortunately, she figured out I was an idiot who never talked about race before, and watched way too much terrible stand-up.
And she, growing up from a wealthy banking family in Trinidad, had to learn that I couldn't just solve all my problems by tapping into connections or money. In fact, I had no idea what to do with money, as she found out when I sent her my money ahead of my arrival in Trinidad, because I didn't feel comfortable carrying it on me. Which really turned into an issue, when the authorities at the airport asked how much I was carrying, and assumed I was an illegal immigrant. Being detained taught me a hell of a lot about my white privilege. And her having to rescue me?
That taught me how important allies are. And what allies need to do, to be considered allies. If I'm not actually making someone's life better, or helping them deal with shit? I'm not an ally. I'm an obstacle.
Yes. Identity and tribalism is what got us into this mess to begin with.
And also global capitalist imperialism, but that's a bit harder to address.
A family is a family. It's not that I consider white and black Americans as one group -- they are one group. I have way more in common with a black guy who grew up in Chicago than I have with a white guy who grew up in Prague. If anything I have a strong bias in the black guy's favor because I know him. With him I can spend countless hours talking about sports, food, sports, weather, sports, music, and sports. With the white guy I'd be limited to asking questions about Dracula, which would be awkward because that's the wrong country.
I care about black Americans because they are Americans. I don't need another reason. It goes deeper than just caring about people in general.
Man, I'd love to hear your take specifically on Hispanic allies, because while we share a lot of struggles in the US, a lot of Latin America is mega racist, or think racism is over and just an American thing, and since "Hispanic" allows any skin color, even within a Hispanic community, you'll have white Hispanics being racist towards black Hispanics, and while Hispanics love to think that "your fight is our fight", I think it's way more complicated than that (it's a great sentiment, though). We're also not treated the same by whites based on how we look (as you can see from my profile picture, I have a pretty light complexion, my nickname sounds pretty American, and I don't usually have a noticeable accent (years of training), so I have the privilege of getting to avoid a lot of racism), and to complicate matters further, Hispanics were also slave owners. One of my ancestors was straight up a slave trader after the natives were enslaved and then wiped out and they had to bring in black slaves.
Excuse any weird wording, English isn't my first language.
I think you said it better in English than I could have, and English is my only language.
You bring some illuminating points
This is a good topic to touch on.
I was born and raised in Newark and grew up around Spanish, Asians and black folks, so a lot of the N word, Spanish and Asian slurs were thrown around both as a term of endearment and as a term of hate.
Racism is alive and well within our black, brown and yellow communities, as well as homophobia and sexism.
While both communities have become more inclusive and diverse, and sure we both have shared similar struggles, the racism’s is still prevalent today.
I too have avoided some of the harsher side of racism and because I’m Latino, I was accepted into racist white circles where I was told “you’re one of the good ones”, a comment I thought was a compliment in my youth but later realized what it was.
I’m part white Hispanic - the castiza thing is real. I benefit in the USA being light and also in Spanish countries. Frankly, I think whites in Hispanic and Latin countries are far more racist than whites in the USA. Though I will say my white Hispanic family in Puerto Rico is far more racist and biased than my family in Valencia, España. I have found Spaniards to be far more aware of their history than others in the Hispanosphere.
Racism is all over the globe due to imperialism, colonialism and chattel slavery. Since the US is the empire that dictates how things work globally then that comes with conditioning and propaganda of the masses of people on how to see people, things and the entire planet as a whole. Nonetheless, allow that are symptoms of the problem. If root of the problem is not rooted out, it will mutate and create others symptoms to the problem.
THIIISSS!!! I moved to the UK from Chile a couple of years ago, and it is so confusing. I have white privilege in Chile but not in the UK...and even though I'm mixed (lebanese-chilean-italian), the way people see me in Chile, where there is a lot of racism and elitism, is as italian, meaning white...but not in the UK. I have tried to explain my parents this and they don't understand, they actually think there is no such thing as racism in Chile...when they visited, I tried to explain my dad (who is white) that I have been followed around in shops but that he probably wouldn't have that experience, and he looked at me like I'm talking nonsense. And people from my background don't understand that we have erased black citizens from our history, or that we are ragingly racist against indigenous people. Also, it's been a whole new thing to acknowledge my own privilege while at the same time working on my biases and on receiving bias in a new country...ver eye opening and difficult. This is what we lack in Latin America, the awareness that this touches us also.
Spike Lee's pure joy at his "not my cup of tea" comment brings me life😂
A whole mood.😅
I'd like but it is at 69 so I'll comment instead, that clip is amazing! It's way past 69 now so I added my like.
@@JamesonHuddle I respect that😅
Its the best thing in the world 🤣
Made my day fr hahaha
As a sidenote (and at the risk of sounding like a "actually" boy), Alexandre Dumas was the son of a black father and white mother. It was his father, Thomas-Alexandre, who was the son of a white slave owner father and a black slave woman. Thomas-Alexandre went on to become a General of the French Army, and along with Toussaint Louverture remained the only two black men to become generals in western military until the 1970s. He died in poverty after Napoleon undid some of the French Revolution's gains (going so far, if I'm not mistaken, as to prohibit black people from living in Paris) and being basically hated by Napoleon on a personal level.
Not salient to the video, I know, but I think it's worth pointing out the life of Thomas-Alexandre.
While we're being pedantic, Gen. Benjamin Davis was promoted to Brigadier General in the U.S. Army in 1940, so you can add him to the (exceedingly short) list alongside Dumas and Louverture.
Napoleon mad as fuck Haiti lost him the war lol.
Also add to the list, Vicente Guerrero who was Afro Mexican and became a Mexican President (who coincidentally abolished slavery over 30 years before the US). Add, Jose Antonio Maceo the “Bronze Titan” of Cuba who helped make Cuba independent of Spain.
He was captured after a battle and normally in that time you would ransom out your generals an example is george washington was ransomed out by england during the english french war, the reason he wasn't ransomed out was he was popular enough to be a threat to napoleon. He was released after the french beat ferdiand 4th, with no back pay, partially paralysed, blind in one eye and deaf in a ear from what he thought was poisoning. he died a few years later and his statue along with is his son's and grandson's were taken down during the nazi occupation of france.
Also add Ivan Abramovich Hannibal, General in Chief of the Russian Imperial army, and his father Abram Hannibal, also a General in Chief of the Russian Imperial Army.
This is some real ass shit. Ive asked my self that alot lately. Do I really care for marginalized people of color or do I just despise all the dumb, southern, conservative bs ive had to be brought up around. I know I care about other people but its in that vague "everybody get along" type mentality. Youve given me aot more to think about. Awesome video dude!
I’ve especially seen this kind of thing with trans people (as a trans guy myself) but also a lot with Jewish allyship?? Like, it’s never “trans liberation now” or “Jewish voices matter in this topic”.... it’s always “fuck terfs” and “punch a nazi”. It’s about hating the oppressor and not helping the oppressed.
@@readytobebolder 100% Agree
@Maxwell Long It's a fraught topic. I know that Nazis and TERFs hide behind people that look like me, so calling them out is my job. But is it my place to pick whose voices from another community should be uplifted? Clearly not, right? Plus, look at how the people that get uplifted by the dominant society usually aren't the ones that really challenge the power. Then that "sit back and listen, don't make it about you" thing kicks in and not wanting to fuck it up makes "uplifting" people complicated.
But it's easy to see how kicking the Nazis and TERFs out of the "town center" and giving marginalized people a bigger place in our conversation helps, and it helps in a way that white folks know is their work to do, and it doesn't rely on us to pick who we want to platform.
Maybe there's going to be a clearer path to mutual empowerment in the future but right now it can be hard to feel like you're doing the right thing unless you're listening a lot, getting out of the way a lot, and mostly just sabotaging the systems of oppression that live in your own community.
With me a question is sorta like Elphaba's from "Wicked" "[Am] I really seeking good? Or [am] I just seeking attention?" So far my answers are "I do want a better world, a better country for all people because I don't want to be complicit in oppression, but my desperate need for validation because I have trouble producing it in myself seeps into that sometimes and I need to watch out for that because that helps no one. Not oppressed minorities or myself."
@@readytobebolder As a trans person I agree, and as a life-long hater of nazis, it took me an embarrassingly long time to realize I should actually learn about the jewish community. Although, most of the "fuck terfs" people are trans, I think...? But yeah I would love if even one person said "Don't talk over trans voices". People act like we're lab rats, like we can't possibly have relevant opinions about our own bodies and experiences.
"You save the day, but then the day resets." This line in particular stayed with me
I love what that woman said, "how much do you like to be right?" because that applies to anyone who has an ego. I love to be right, I love winning arguments online, but when it comes to being an ally, I have to be able to set my ego aside, I have to be ready to be quiet and let other people make their voices heard. I have to be able to say ok, I'm wrong, and that comes with expanding my perspective by listening to black people and realizing, 'ok, I didn't think of it as being like that' now I realize I couldn't even comprehend that person's experience/view point. some people can't make that secession and they go from fighting racism to being racist just so they can maintain this idea they have of self righteous superiority, and its like bro...you just lost the entire plot
What is it like being yt? How does it feel to be privileged?
@@cruzalta1696 well you don't fear for your life when cops are around. Honestly privilege does feel nice. But recognizing that comes with an overwhelming sense of guilt, especially when you see how others are treated in your own community, or how your peers act-pretending like they aren't privileged while holding views that are completely afforded by it.
Giving Spike Lee that Jojo music given his Oscars 'fit that year... the editing **chefs kiss**
Yesssss that was perfect! I stand this 💪🏾
@@ndaeman 💀💀 now I'm picturing Spike Lee's Stand....a drone hovering a truck with trailer attachment... name: Dolly Shotgun 😏
Imma need a timestamp, KING CRIMSON
@@gatfatf check it out at 32:26
.....it's meme waiting to be birthed 😅
I had to do a double take on it and popped when I'd confirmed it.
I think Schultz ultimately has some clarity in the end when he says "I'm sorry, I couldn't resist."
He knew he fucked up.
one last line to round out his awesome, likeable, and ultimately still white character
It's taken me years to see how I have perpetuated and accepted "ally" behaviors as a mixed POC with lighter skin. It's insidious how much I internalized anti-blackness and assimilated with white culture to survive at the expense of my more marginalized friends and myself. Thank you for this video. A reminder to keep reflecting, unlearning, and listening.
I see you over there growin'.
I confess. I’m a Homie. YOU are the g.o.a.t. Best, most thoughtful and well researched analysis ever. God bless you. Thrive and prosper.
Blindspotting came out the same year as Green Book, and the fact that the former is an underground gem and the latter won Best Picture is ludicrous. Also, on a purely technical level, Blindspotting not getting nominated for Best Film Editing at the Oscars while Bohemian Rhapsody won the damn thing is a sin I will never forgive.
Blindspotting is INSANELY underrated. I'd also say it deserved nominations in Screenplay and Acting at the very least.
You talking about the older movie with the two guys that work for a moving company and the one guy witnessed a cop commit murder? That's a great film! There's a recent show called that that's trying to cover up that movies existence, I swear.
ROCK AND ROLL > whatever blindpsotting is about
@@tigerlilysoma588Actually the show is a sequelb
It's a shame how easy it is to be ignorant of marginalized people until it's someone that you care about deeply, and then you feel compelled to be an ally. I myself have been guilty of this until recently. I just want to thank you for your content, and how eye opening it's been. I'm sure my girlfriend feels the same way. She absolutely doesn't have time to explain every little thing to me, and you really help me do my homework, and gain a broader understanding.
“It's a shame how easy it is to be ignorant of marginalized people until it's someone that you care about deeply, and then you feel compelled to be an ally.”
The issue is that this is actually the way 90% of the population works, empathy builds better when he we can see and or feel it happen to those closest to us as opposed to seeing it far off and or not having the same personal connection.
This does not make you inherently flawed as it seems to be implied.
It just means you have be more open to expanding your empathy and understanding of situations when it deserves it.
@@mckenzie.latham91 so? still a shame. unnecessary comment
@@jermanizer Everything in this thread is an unnecessary comment.
You commented and you comment because you want to, not because you are obligated and or it is required for you to add your two cents
that’s the whole point about these public forums.
the discussion of allyship always brings up for me this quote: “If you have come here to help me you are wasting your time, but if you have come because your liberation is bound up with mine, then let us work together.”
― Lilla Watson
I think my biggest issue in my own journey learning how to be an effective ally is letting go of righteous indignation when it comes to people on the other side of the moral and political spectrum and finding a balance between holding people accountable for their bad behaviour while still understanding the system that created their belief structure and figuring out how to overcome the system and not just admonish or dehumanize the people I feel aligned against.
That's my biggest problem too.
(Love your name) I think it's become more difficult bc injustice and damaging marginalized groups has become very extreme in many ways. Meaning people in power have been having a field day cutting off the rights of and endangering marginalized groups in ways that are frankly inhumane. It's hard to find the humanity in someone who is denying the humanity of others, if that males sense.
So I think that makes it difficult not to be fueled by righteous indignation when the degree of harm is so great. The greater the harm, the greater the emotion.
I think on a one-on-one level it's easier to try to find the humanity of the opposition, for lack of a better word, provided that individual is even open to a dialog. But when we're talking about the larger and more powerful groups weilding their privilege like a weapon it's difficult not to view them as a monolith in a very us VS. them way.
This video is a year old and heated, manipulative rhetoric or mishandled allyship is an even worse problem. People are getting shot while getting their mail, or jogging, or just disagreeing. Everything feels heightened and more volatile. Not exactly an environment for reasonable and open conversation, and I think that muddies the water when it comes to allyship.
Hope that made sense.
All I gotta say is this: I really love this corner of TH-cam. Thank you, Fiq!!!!
about the fruit flies
put some apple cider vinegar in a jar, add a tiny bit of dawn, swirl it around, cover it in plastic, and poke holes in the plastic.
change it once a day and you'll be fruit fly free in a week.
I do this except for the Dawn. How does the dish soap help?
@@collyflower6623 Dish soap breaks down the chitin, killing them. The vinegar should be potent enough to do so on it’s own though! 🤗 I usually use Dawn on sink drains if I notice the fruit flies collecting around those areas.
@@LivingEncyclopedia I thought the dish soap was there to lower the surface tension, making the flies drown.
@@LivingEncyclopedia I thought it made the walls of the jar slippery so they can't climb out before the vinegar pickles them
So, you CAN catch more flies with vinegar instead of honey after all? ... Damn, my whole life is a lie xP
(Seriously, tho, thanks for the tip)
11:20 thank you for bringing up other groups who do experience this. I am not black, I am queer and (this may sound strange but i have pretty severe neurodivergence) it is valuable to me as a queer person to hear someone from another marginalized group foster a sense of community and empathy between marginalized groups. It not only validates my (and many others) queer experience, but it continues to solidify the solidarity, empathy, and respect that we should have for one another as minorities and human beings.
I just have to say,
1. Content is phenomenal as usual.
2. I’m so thrilled you are sponsored!
3. That you have a sponsor that isn’t a deviation from your content or one that is over saturated and just a cash grab (i.e. Hello Fresh, Skill Share, etc.). I love that you are specific and intentional with who you sponsor with.
"Along with my first sponsor." I SCREAMED. Massive props to you and can't wait to see more people hit you up.
The word "ally" always bugged me cause I keep thinking of it in like a global political sense. Countries are allies, when it suits them. They still spy on each other and try to get their own political agenda across. They can make new allies and break with old ones.
So there's always this part of me that feels like, idk, it's the wrong word? I mean, maybe it's accurate in a lot of ways. Performative wokeness is a thing. It's still political. And white ppl still end up pushing their agenda above others. But... Could the word be part of the problem? Like if other people out there are like me and applying it's meaning as something similar to watch countries do, than aren't you kind of always expecting your Ally to turn on you? And as a Ally, aren't you more likely shift your alliship when it suits you?
Idk. Just a thing I think of sometimes
I know what you mean. I think the best thing white people can aim for (I'm white myself) is to be friends to marginalised communities. Friendship > allyship, because at the end of the day allies (in the global political sense) are just trying to further themselves forward. They're using their relationships with other countries/communities to push their own agendas. I think it would be really interesting to know how the word "ally" came to be used in a racial/social justice context because it has those subtle negative connotations.
I say white people should aim to be "friends" but even that word feels a little bit off.
Supporter? Was thinking advocator at first but that is speaking for others issue.
But a supporter CAN also be patronizing, like „having to support someone who couldn’t handle it themselves“
An ally should technically be more on the same Level, but usually they aren’t
Partners? Words are so inadequate
I think that's exactly why 'ally' is the right word. It sounds like its coined by marginalised identity groups to describe privileged people who intend to help (or say so). Yea allies can betray, change allegiance, not show up, or desert the cause. And history suggests that's what often happens. Cause 'allies' will never be as invested as the group they are trying to help (ostensibly), because they aren't part of that group. In fact they benefit from that group's marginalisation. So the term 'ally' seems spot on to me, cause it captures the continued difference between the 'ally's' and the marginalised group's positionalities and all that that entails.
Your the first person in social media that i´ve heard say that you can't become an expert in a topic only by researching a couple weeks, or simply adressing this point. I think sometimes it's to easy to forget about that, and how most people who engage in this topics are just learning, not experts. Even experts have trouble understanding and arriving at some basic consensus when the topics are so complex. Just wanted to say it's great!
Thanks for reccomending "Racism Without Racists", as a white person I think it's actually pretty accurate, a lot of the thought patterns it talks about are ones I've noticed but haven't been able to fully label until now.
Like whites being more likely to criticize POCs: a lot of the time, I would notice someone's race, but convince myself that I needed to criticize them while ignoring it in the name of colorblindness. That felt good, so sometimes I'd start looking for something to criticize when I saw a POC. I was vaguely aware that this was bad, but in the name of "colorblindness" I tried _(actively)_ not to think about it, but in some backwards way I thought that by ignoring race I was promoting equality.
Mi have nuff of these allies in my Political Science department. About to share this with them and if the shoe fit… THEN THE RASSCLAT SHOE FITTTT 😂
🤣🤣💛💛💛
😂😂😂
No mercy!
Congrats on the sponsor, specifically for getting one that actually aligns with the channel. Thats huge
Maybe a big problem of all depicted types of allies is that they most always just do what they think is right, instead of actually listening to the group they wanna support or asking them what they can do.
For me personally an „ally“ isn’t necessarily someone who jumps in and solves my problems when I’m struggling, but more often someone who can help me to find strength to help myself. Someone who is there because they actually like me and care for me, not out of some kind of obligation or dread. Not a savior, a supporter.
Thank you for this you just basically describe the dictionary interpretation of allyship. Thank you.
This man is always working towards the betterment of humanity. Even in the ads and sponsors. He needs a bigger platform.
“If we commit to doing better, and being careful in engaging in sensitive conversations that we’re new to, and also just be willing to learn, we’ve got a lot going for us in that regard”
Now THAT is simple and actionable. Thanks for the perspective 🙏
"Along with my first sponsor..."
Fucking YES!! This channel deserves every bit of the success it's getting.
I can’t express in one comment how much I appreciate your perspectives and videos in general.
As a "homie", I fell into some of those traps when I was younger. I grew up in a predominantly Black town and am a minority myself as a bisexual trans man. I'm also married to a Black woman whom I've been with for 12 years. I distinctly remember when I started being seen as "part of the community" and not just a white friend.
When I was younger, I was so stuck in what it meant to *me* to be part of that community, that I forgot what it meant to the community for me to be there. There were times where white people would say things around me, or I'd witness something and I couldn't let it go. I saw it as an attack on the people I loved. The people who loved me. I reacted to these things with vehement rejection, blind to the privileges that allowed me to voice such vehemence without the same fear of reprisal.
I still have these moments, but my wife definitely helps keep it in check. Some of it is that's just who I am. When people step up against the trans community that I have a call to since birth, I can't abide that shit either, but I've learned to temper it as I've gotten older.
It's rarely about me. And unless I can use relative privilege to give other people the platform they're denied, I've learned to stop making my loved ones' lives harder.
The point Dr. Nicole made about prioritizing being right making it harder to be an ally really resonated with me. Great video, as always.
But outside a fictional movie how does that play in real life? I’d like an actual real life example to see how this works and analyze it.
@ To me, there's a difference between ally and advocate. Im not saying allies have no value, they do--however their purpose and how they execute social justice is only a first step.
An ally will engage with speaking out and actively addressing issues that they encounter that harms marginalized identities when the situation arises. Calling someone out for telling a racist or homophobic joke. Speaking out about the disparities of a targeted group. This is helpful, however, it doesn't dig deep. Thiis why I feel being an ally is not enough for breaking the wheel and why so many want to jump on the ally wagon. It's only catching situations as they come. They're moments. They're buckets of opportunities that allow us to speak out, and make an impact--but, honestly, it is only individual--it doesn't address systemic issues that perpetuate the harm. That is also why many of us get it wrong. Individual level "feels" more attainable, cathartic and helps us feel like "Hey! I'm not like the others. Im part of the change!" But that feeling is about ourselves. It's a pat on our back and a way to somehow distance ourselves from other bad actors without major risk to our place in cis-het white supremacy machine. This doesn't help break any gears.
I think that is where the advocate/activist comes in--they are the individuals who are in it for the long haul. They are the "homie" that actually is attuned to their privilege and use it not just when an incident occurs, but maintains a continued effort towards dismantling a systemic issue with others even at the risk of losing out. They believe that solidarity is what dismantles oppressive systems, not trying to be a savior. They've learned (probably the hard way like I did) when to step up and when the STFU and step back. They have made a conscious decision to disrupt the system they actually benefit from. It's not uncommon for advocates and activists who have lost their marriage, or their job, or even cut off from some family members--which is a risk when you tackle the system.
People have to be real--to a lot of us, losing benefits from not being complicit in the system is really scary, and I think that's where we see the "what's an easy fix so I can feel like I've done my part?" There is no easy fix--unless you choose performative BS. And the communities you work with deserve more than that.
The hard work is in the long haul, educating yourself, decentering yourself and the dominant identities, and always remembering the first rule: First, do no harm.
I ran into your channel by following Khadijah Mbowe and I'm really glad I did! I have now become a faithful subscriber.
Congrats on your sponsorship and get some apple cider vinegar and dish soap for those fruit flies.
Yes, that makes sense. I think I get what you're saying about these considerations, and the distinction between ally and advocate. I can see the real qualitative difference there that people would do well to recognize.
The saviour ally part reminded me so much of how in movies and tv-series featuring crime and victims of crime and trauma basically end when the story of the saviour, the protagonist ends, they saved the victims from the perps, from the abusers, monsters but the victims story is far from over, they'll have to live with the traumas and the longterm effects of the crime but there is no interest to show that part as the protagonist's story has ended. That has always felt exploitative with how such media in essence "create" trauma victims for the amusements and thrills of an audience. Not sure where I'm going with this but it felt related with how in the end when the saviour think they're done the victims, the disadvantaged groups still have to live with it all, in it all.
It's always grinded my gears whenever us Americans are talking about issues in our country, and a white person from another country butts in and tries to gloat, mock and make fun of our issues when their own country hasn't even begun to pinpoint their racism problem. At this point, I've just gotten used to outsiders watching us for entertainment and to sling mud at us and not because they actually care about the cause.
My best friend used to work with a German who loved to decry American racism. Her father had served with Das Reich (yes, that Das Reich) and his opinions of Jews, the Poles, the French, all came down intact. Racism is not the problem of any one nation.
Because you guys are drowning in shit and is honestly hilarious.
see the things that bothers me the most is that people from here (Italy in my case) don't really care about this stuff because they like to think that only the US "has a historical racism problem" and so it's their problem to solve, while we elect politicians who want "illegal immigrants who steal our jobs" out of the country and ALSO not providing them, or anyone who is really poor and COINCIDENTALLY either from North/Central Africa or Middle-Eastern countries, a living wage, housing and education. Trust me, our universities are whiter than the marble they are built with.
@@jossaccountofmadnessandmem1844 ok, there is a difference between racism and xenophobia. América is drowning in racism, you can't really compare the refugee crisis of Europe to any problem the USA has, take into account that people didn't allow black and White citizens to share a bathroom till 1964, very different situation.
@@remiremsar5946 Europe isn't racist per se but there are a lot of people who are and are ruining everything
The Homie= Eminem
The Partner= El-p
The Savior= Macklemore
Lmao! Thats good.
Holy shit, this is spot on!
I think Em and El-P did a little better than the characters FD talks about here, but yeah, the dynamic is exactly right.
How to be an ally: just be a good friend, do as you would hope your best friend would do for you, and don't be confrontational, but make it known you're aware of what's going on and you are disappointed.
It's sad you have to call that an ally, but here we are, having to construe being an ally with being a good friend
Thanks, it's just a friend or a decent man..John Brown, Elizabeth van lew were allies they took risk but today it's just basic humanity.
Not sure it’s same as being a good friend.. I can be a good friend without interrogating my own biases and conditioning, by being on their “side”, like that’s the “homie” right? Ally ship shouldn’t be based on receiving friendship in return, it’s about social bonds to ppl you don’t have any person bonds to, sometimes over your bonds with your friends. That requires regular humility and continuous self deconstruction. Friendships can often re-affirm your worth and self perception rather than challenge it. So yea, think there’s a difference 🤷🏻
@@Pandemonius88 Ooh yes, well said. You can be or have a good friend who gives you the things you want emotionally and cares about you. Being an ally requires the effort to really look at their marginalized identity or identities (asking questions respectfully or doing research to learn more), unlearning your unconscious/internalized biases and reprogramming those to be a more sensitive friend and person. But a good friend to a marginalized person should be an ally or be working on it.
@@Pandemonius88 on a superficial level, yes. I can see how you're right. However, what kind of friend would I be if I only cared about how I interacted with them.
I mean, you're objectively correct if all I cared about was how we interacted with each other. When with friends of color, or loved ones(my ex fiance, who I'm close with still), you start to notice shit and you ask questions. I think anyone with a reasonable sense of humanity in my position wouldn't consider yourself just an ally, but a good friend to the cause too.
The way I see it, an ally just fights with you, but has no personal vestment in the matter. One of my best friends, my cousin, my previously mentioned ex, several childhood friends, and my band teacher would all have to mean less to me in order to be an ally. It's not only the solipsistic nature of human interaction, I genuinely care about their well beings, as well as being upset about what they have to go through. That goes deeper than just being an ally. I get what you're saying, but for me to call myself an ally is for me to deny myself of an entire life's worth of close personal relationship to say "I'm still with you", when I always was. It's personally demeaning, in my case, in my opinion. And please don't think I'm being pretentious about it, I just feel like maybe there needs to be a different word other than "Ally" for the white people who literally grew up at, or around the cookout, you know?
I'm by no means saying that people in my shoes understand that struggle, but I can say that I've known about it longer then it's been recognized as a problem, and I've been called defamatory names by white people by my association with people I just considered to be "friends". So being told what I am, and am not, is a bit demeaning. This is the culture I literally grew up in, I don't know anything else. My friend are my friends, I love who I love, and I'm a product of my environment. I can't change my proximity just because it's now a national issue. I always was a friend first, and I spoke out when I needed to in public, but i am always a friend first.
@@DrJellyFanguzzz "but for me to call myself an ally is for me to deny myself of an entire life's worth of close personal relationship"
- Why? I'm not sure why you recognise inter-personal relationships and allyship as mutually exclusive. Allyship is a political designation (AFAIK), your personal relationships are irrelevant to it. You are an ally solely because of the societal position you hold (i.e. white) in relation to the 'cause' (i.e. black liberation). However much your upbringing was 'around the cookout' doesn't change that societal position. It's a broad term that bears no meaning on your personal relationships or your motivations. Perhaps a more interesting question is "what does 'ally' mean to you?" (just food for thought).
The “counterfeit cookout invitation” had me instantly like this video. 😂😂😂
Love the point about needing to be flexible and able admit fault. I wonder how social media impacts the ability to do that, a lot of our political discourse these days takes place online, and it's probably a lot harder to listen when you are addicted to getting thumbs up notifications and able to cultivate an echo chamber.
"First sponsor is not Raid Shadow Legends" had me rolling in tears 💀😂. Congrats on your first sponsor, one that is meaningful. Love your videos man, they help me explain my thoughts being a black man to my friends. Keep up the great work and I appreciate the videos.
Just like y'all were saying, it is insanely hard to separate people from their egos even when they have the best of intentions
your videos do a great job approaching challenging topics and offering people genuine education while still making sure to maintain empathy and understanding as the speaker. Hope you keep doing well on here
Hi, for some reason youtube started recommending your videos to me, some random white chick from Brazil, so I'm definitively not invited for the cookout. I like to listen to my black friends' perspectives and do the best I can to be a good ally. idk if I'm doing it right, but I like to listen to what my friends have to say: it isn't up to me to decide what should be said, but them. And this is why I believe that channels like yours are very important. Thank you for putting this out here.
It's a dumb nitpick but you mixed up Alexandre Dumas with his dad Thomas-Alexandre Dumas. The point still stands of course since his dad was able to become a General in the French Army precisely because his father was a French nobleman who took him from Haiti to France to be educated.
I caught this because I'm in middle of reading "The Black Count", a biography of General Dumas. His story really does show how the lofty ideals of equality that fueled the French Revolution clashed with the oppressive reality of Europe and its colonies during that time
I feel as though the partner role is the most beneficial placing in “allyship” due to the equal footing and common ground goals they have. I enjoy the content wholeheartedly.
As an Xennial, I find it frustrating to talk to Gen-Z folks about marginalized communities, especially LGBTQ+. A lot of that comes from the fact that I lived through worse times for the community, and I have shit I still need to unpack from living through the 90s and early 00s. On one hand, their baseline hopefulness that things will progress is encouraging. On the other hand, I've experienced so many periods of backlash that it's hard to not be cynical about their outlook.
As a Zillenial, we tend to not be big fans of incrementalism, but yeah
@@alienvomitsex tbh. i still believe there is so much hope in all of us!
This is the best explanation I've seen in a while of the types of *allyship.
I'm reminded of what a gay friend once said- "you don't get to call yourself an ally. If we see you as an ally, we will call you one."
And seriously, if you have a need to label yourself an ally, you probably aren't one because you're making it about you.
Allyship is an action, not an adjective.
It's counterproductive to alienate people from trying to be good. That's why the landscape will never change for the LGTB community.
you have great speaking skills, i didnt even realize i watched 47 minutes until the video ended
Interesting acknowledgment that Robert is just a kid. I saw his videos pop up in my recs and I watched a few, and my biggest take away is "oh, this is a kid". I don't think what he says is completely without value, but I'll be more interested to see where he is on ten years from now after he has a lot more life experience.
Speaking as one of them, I think the current generation both in and just leaving college is in a similar boat. Lots of very upset, motivated, and intelligent individuals that want to see real change where it matters, but right now are bereft of real-world experience needed to make that impact.
Same. Now that I know he's a decade younger than I am, that changes my thoughts. I feel like I barely know anything, and I knew even less at his age.
thank you! there's so much to think about. i'm autistic and before i knew that, it was too easy to go from 1 to 10 on topics i was passionate about, i definitely was being a savior. it's still hard to fight that impulse, but it's getting easier. communication has always been hard for me, i cry easy or my selective mutism kicks in, but transitioning this conversations to more text based has helped me slow down a little bit and get something coherent out.
Fantastic sponsors! I went to the "How to be an Ally" Virtual Summit with my workplace - would highly recommend. This video added a lot more depth for me on how to stop gatekeeping, be ok with being uncomfortable and wrong, and continuing to listen and strive to be a better ally. Really enjoy your videos and I'm looking forward to the next ones!
Thank you so much! I’m definitely a homie to the Latino community in my area. I grew up in a diverse neighborhood, am “conditionally” white as a white Latino, and have adopted a lot of Latino culture even though I was raised by a white mother and learned Spanish as a teenager/adult. I never heard the term ally until the last few years and thought the idea was odd considering my position. I’m like, just be kind to folks and recognize that racial injustice is real and pervasive in our society. What’s all this talk about allies?! That being said, I get defensive when I’m made aware of my privilege and certain aspects of my identity are surely an attempt to overcompensate for my “homie” status.
Thanks again! I just started watching your videos! Love them.
Why do you get defensive? Have you figured that out?
What if you don't wana be an ally because you realise the real game is about what empowers and benefits yourself above everyone else
Before I press the start button...
Hollywood portrayal of being an Ally:
The Help
Blind Side
Green Bulls*#t Book
Me: How NOT to be an Ally:
Chapter1: The Help
Blind Side
Green B🤢 ( sorry threw up a lil bit.....)
I am still mentally scared by both 😩couldn’t do the Green one- trailer was good enough 😬😬😬
Congratulations on the sponsor!!!
F.D - The way you talk and present information, as well as your general demeanor and wholesome character are things that I wish I had discovered years ago on youtube. I'm so happy you popped into my feed. Thanks for all that you do and keep on keeping on.
Consistently one of the best creators on this platform rn. Always really great, really unique stuff. Need more people like you on here.
Wow, I hadn't thought about the fact that those saviour movies are more about them than the marginalised group/individual, but as soon as you pointed it out, it about smacked me in the face!!
The point that solutions are systemic rather than individual is another thing that I hadn't thought about. Thanks for educating me 🙂
I think about that The Legend of Aang's scene with Iroh alot when thinking about allyship: Zuko asks his uncle and one of the strongest firebenders, Iroh, to finish his brother(Zuko's father) and end the reign of terror. Iroh being the figure of wisdom throughout the show replies with somehing like "Even if i could do that, imagine what it would mean for history: the war didn't end at all, the world only saw brothers killing eachother for political power".
Of course it's not in a racial matter, but i think the message is about how we must be carefull of our actions when we make dificult and deep decisions like these. If your acts of "allyship" only benefit yourself, a privileged person who is part of the problem, how can they help the ones who are strugglin'? The only ones who benefit with a image of "privileged savior" are the privileged ones themselves.
Sorry for the bad english.
This is so powerful and so true. A slightly different circumstance, but I’ve seen so many people treat being my friend as almost an accolade…And they often don’t even confront the homophobic/transphobic tendencies they have when referring to other queer people…they think that just because they’re my friend that they’re actively saying they’re not hateful towards lgbtq+ individuals but will be the same folks that literally try to mandate how others should express their gender/sexuality…it’s wild and really sad how a lot of allies in the savior category don’t actually see that rather than being a good person they’re actually actively making the community members uncomfortable for the sake of not being seen as a bigot/hateful…
I can't imagine being an ally without a sense of humility.
So glad blindspotting is getting the recognition it deserves
I was really stoked to hear you talk about Blindspotting. As soon as you mentioned the Homie, Miles was the first character to come to my mind.
I love your work; I appreciate your reminders that there are no easy answers.
i felt really called out by the segment about "feeling right."
and that's good, btw.
ive got a lot to think about. especially about how i relate to both these issues, and the people that i conceptualize in my head as the enemy.
i really appreciate this channel. thanks for calling me out.
"Am I really an ally" is so real. Like it's not enough to just understand racism, i have to back it up with actions. What am I doing? Is it enough? Can it ever be enough?
I think a big thing surrounding the three ally archetypes is agency. While the homie has about the same amount, and the partner has a little bit more agency than the POC character, the savior holds most, if not all of the agency. Backing up to allow marginalized groups to strategize and make their own plans is a crucial aspect of being an ally. Knowing when to duck out is just as important as knowing when to take action
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I have to say, this video was really hard for me to watch as a white person who believed I was a good ally. Thank you for calling me on my shit and teaching me how to put actions to my words
Also I'm so happy for you to get your first sponsorship!
I would love to see a good movie with a subversion of the white savior trope that illuminates the issues you talk about here. It's such a bad trope that makes a lot of bad movies, even if they're well-cast and well-produced. But it'd probably need to have a "bad" ending, and people usually dislike that. You are right that _Blindspotting_ did a good job with that dynamic and was generally just really good.
Get Out?
@@DizzyBusy I'm not seeing the connection. How do you feel it subverts the trope?
@@bloodgain It could be they're referring to Rose (the girlfriend). She put a great deal of effort into looking performatively woke, to the point of confronting a police officer and telling him off for his racism.
Then it turns out it was not only a performance, but a subtle excuse to keep Chris's ID out of the local PD system so he can't be tracked down. And, obviously, she turns out to be one of the racist antagonists all along.
I get what D Z means by the suggestion, but I'd still like a film where it gets dressed down more specifically.
@@baydiac Oh, OK. I totally forgot about that scene. I need to rewatch _Get Out._
If my memory serves correctly, Django Unchained subverted it pretty well