For me the reaction was surprise and panic. Surprise because they basically think your dumb in the first place for getting involved with them and how easy you were to manipulate. Ultimately it lead to her ghosting me because they can’t have anyone in their life who knows how bad they are. You just get replaced by someone who doesn’t know.
The beauty of going NO CONTACT is that you ALSO don't know if they haven't actually tried to contact you. Backwards as that sounds, it defo helps you move onto your best life quicker.
Over 11 years and a child my experience was everything discussed in this video that led me down a deep dark rabbit hole of self-doubt and severe depression. Final straw being a protective order against me of false accusations and lies. She only had the protection order for herself not our child so I still continued to see my daughter which was 50 to 60% of the time. Then one day she just cut me off completely and that lasted for two months that I did not see my child. Then one day my daughter pretty much just showed up on my doorstep and has been living with me ever since and that's been about 5 months now. The light at the end of the tunnel being I'm about to get custody of my daughter. Currently in progress. The hardest thing I've ever experienced in my life and I don't wish it upon my worst enemy but I am in such a better place than I used to be and I am just working on getting myself back. I will never go backwards ever again with her. It took a while but those feelings are long gone. She lost not me!
You really nailed it...when I caught on, who he really was, he pulled away and I got more distant! We were engaged and lived together. I would question him and say, you are toxic and cruel to me and say such mean hurtful things! Any way, long story short, he moved out and got engaged 2 months later and then married her, a little while after that. He most likely already had her lined up and ready to be with. They move fast...oh well, he's her problem now!
The night before she officially ended out marriage she ended it by accident by telling me I needed to find someone who can make me happy. When I questioned her on it and told her she just ended our marriage she said she didn't say that and I misheard her. She did this three more times then became angry as hell started throwing stuff around the house then went back to her old reliable that we needed marriage counseling. She ended it the next morning when I started contacting the guy I found her talking to.
Wow that stings. You are in hell now but you will bounce back. She's a weight off your shoulder keeping you down. Trust me Bro you'll be fine. Block her on everything so she can't mess with you....cause when her little rebound doesn't work out she'll be straight back to you. You gotta resist her lies and BS. She's already showed you what she's truly like underneath. She didn't leave you for somebody better, she left you for somebody who hasn't seen through her BS yet...yet. He will soon trust me bro. Go see a lawyer and keep yourself right legally cause she will be after your cash and out to ruin you. Especially when you don't take her back it will send her nuts. And if you believe her and take her back she will lose even more respect for you and the abuse will be much worse, leave you suicidal. You stay strong bro you'll get through this. Forget that b^tch, she's pure evil.
I wanted to contact her new supply, but they’ve known each other since they were teens, so I doubt he’d listen to me anyway. I found out she had been in contact with him during our whole relationship as well, despite her claims of not having talked to him in 10 or 15 years (she used both numbers).
@@BJBlaskovichGaming no don't contact him. Cause she's told him you are unstable and crazy and if you send him a message then he will assume she is correct. There's nothing you can do, he has to learn for himself unfortunately. She never loved you cause she doesn't know how to love somebody. She's a souless robot who needs supply. And if you think he's the only guy she's got on the hook you are mad. They have multiple partners at all times. You hit the gym and get your shit together. You'll be back.
He said to me when I knew and called him out ( I know I should not have, I could not help myself) “What kind of person do you think I am?” I replied “the kind of person that tells your Postpartum wife “we should go our separate ways” Conveniently after receiving their papers” He most def was not expecting that out of my mouth 😂
I was given the insidious silent treatment for months after I was able to penetrate the mask. I realized then I had been living with a petulant child who blamed me for his bad behavior for 35 years. In the end , he told me he wanted more love in his life and walked out the door right into the house of someone he just met online. Good luck to both of them.
One of my adult daughters is the Narcissist in my Life, and she's been giving me the Silent Treatment since January. She realized that I Know what she is. It Really IS Insidious, and I'm only just beginning to enjoy the Peace.
This was the behavior of my so-called fiance. He ended up killing himself because I figured him out and he couldn't get away with his bs anymore. He was a complete narcissist and very mentally ill.
Nail on the head. Cold blooded animals. Even though the jig is up, in their own limited poultry way, they will try again. Stay strong survivor, the final discard is your responsibility.
She panicked and attacked me verbally and went on a smear campaign when I found out she didn’t drop me to “be alone” and “work on” herself. She dropped me for her first bf. Did I mention she was legally married the whole 3.5 years she was with me, and still is so despite being with her new bf? Also, she spoke horribly of her husband the whole time she was with me.
Very great analysis. I did like you. I closed my purse,my car and stop providing all the wants and needs . I was ghosted for 1 week and the jump was made to my neighbour who is also a narcissist 😂.
I used to look back on her holding me tenderly as an example of our great love. Now I remember it was because we’d been fighting so pointlessly with her being cruel and refusing to hear me that I finally collapsed down on the floor and started sobbing. I was so broken from trying so hard and realizing that communication or understanding wasn’t something she was interested in.
Of course seeing me revert to a broken sobbing man while she stood dry eyed immediately ended the fight. She’d won. Now I knew that her understanding or compromise wasn’t part of the deal. Only I had to do that ( without fail)
When I found out about her second boyfriend in another city. She said well you weren’t very serious about us. I’d told her she was the love of my life! More than several times. Sober. In the daylight. With clothes on. I meant it too.
What if you enjoy this with someone you're seeing and they say we're only f buddies while being hot and cold? Is that narcissistic too or does he just want a f buddy?
When my narcex learned that I knew what she was/is she went to the total discard…no hoovers, no contact…and moved to another state…she knows that despite deceiving and abusing me for many years it was over…and it is…
I have horror stories, I tried to push them out of my head but they always flood back in it's hard to imagine that some of these things actually happened to me. I will never trust anyone again and that seems completely rational to me.
+Jess Stanley Praise the LORD amen 🙏🏾 Jess Stanley. if you’re in no contact with the narcissists (whether narcissists does the discarding or narcissists is discarded), the narcissist is doing it all: gaslighting, rage, projection, blame shifting, lustbombing, smear campaigning ……etc. absolutely 💯 awesome accuracy as always Jess Stanley 🎊 🎊 🎉 🎉🎉. God bless. Agape love ❤️
He said “wow your mind is so fucked up” when I called him out on his behavior, meanwhile hours beforehand he had me convinced I was going to be hurt by him. 5:01 i don’t think he’ll ever change lmao.
Thank you for this on point video, Jess. This is so much of what I'm going through and what we talked about during our chat. Still trying to recover. It's a very long and grueling road to heal. 😢
Not always. Some of them once they know that you know what they are vanish from your life forever. I got immediately discarded and blocked everywhere once I told mine they are a narcissist and they knew I figured them out. It’s been 5 months and radio silence. New supply who replaced me contacted me to tell me how toxic narcissist is and that they dumped narcissist after 3 months. I ran into ex narc outside the gym and laughed in their face as I said “I heard things didn’t work out!!!” They ignored me like I wasn’t there and just ran right into the gym as I was leaving. Good riddance. I’m glad I got that satisfaction of letting them know I know my replacement also failed and was the one to dump them
She lied about what she was doing. Pure evil thank God I never slept with her but she did use me for money. After all I did for her now she is running a smear campaign at my work and we don't even work together WTF. I even work from home and still have no peace.
Right at the end-visiting his family-he treated me like dirt. And I pushed back -I was so sick of him-I stopped placating him and he screamed at me in the car-have me the silent treatment I know he tried to use my menopause as a reason why I was off kilter-his sister addressed that….I was counting down the minutes until I had my chance to get out and go NC
Everything you said was what she did! Trying to gaslight what others told me she was doing! Told everyone I tried to turn her ppl against her! Now she hoped to a 42yr old and she’s 28🙌🏾💪🏾thanks for your clarification
For me, every year that passed for the last 3+ years, I told him that I noticed we were no longer having sex regularly (it became only 1-2 times a year) and he was withholding affection. The last time that I confronted him about it, I exposed him. Without any words being said, it was evident that he was just using me in order to live on my property while he saved up money to move to Mexico. I have recently been discarded. One week ago, he had a dinner date with a Mexican woman who is a single mother whom he hired to clean his apartment in Mexico, and now they are in a relationship. 10.19.24
When the shrink got his diagnosis Narc and i was right all the time. His eyes turned black in his rage and i ran that evening for my life and never looked back because i knew like he knew that he was a lost cause.
I just ended it today. (June 6th 2023) Poems i write on ig shows our whole history. Well...a good deal of it! I pray i can do this. Im feeling pretty raw. I got a poem started at least! Tonight im on lam. Im running for my life. If he comes back, hell finish me off. His tongue cuts like a knife.
Another great video. Topic is dead on. Wish I would of known before I was discarded. It happened just like you explained. It was one of the worst things that happened to me when I was discarded , but after learning, it was the best thing that happened to me.Thank you for your videos Your knowledge has been so valuable to me. Keep them coming.
I think when she realized I was onto her, she started attempting to go back to “normal” or “nice” mode, she ditched the passive aggressiveness and pretended to just be trying to benefit me in some way. Not sure how jerking me around is benefitting me but whatevs.
In the end people were calling me the phantom wife. I would not go anywhere with him. I stayed home because I knew if I went out with him, he would treat my like crap in public.
Is there something I did that caused someone to be homic*dal towards me? Because what I remember is that a bunch of people I don’t really know started harassing me and intentionally provoking me - lying about me in such egregious ways I was frightened and shocked- and just kept doing it. I am the victim in this situation. And my neighbors are playing D.A.R.V.O = they are the aggressor!!! Killing a woman for nothing = can’t accept those men are misogynistic.
Thanks to your help, it’s like a checklist now. I’m no longer in shock or derailed by these behaviors. My address book looked like a nuclear test site once I figured them out. 🎉🎉🎉
EVERYTIME You say they are probably grooming someone else or already had someone else makes Me cry my eyes out And everything You Always hit the effing shit they do are plausibly doing And I know You said it's an Ego bruise for us too And that worries Me that I May be a narcissist Too however I do have empathy 😢 And sympathy And that gives me hope lol It's Just so gut wrenching And I always seem to be sucked back in no matter how I know it's toxic And I'm worth More than this shitty treatment it's Just fucked up And I just can't understand that he or people did This for fun And entertainment 😢 thanks Jess for your channel And sharing your expertise first hand experiences and being You 🙏 XOXO 😘😊
I called a covert straight up a fake with an explanation why she was. She ghosted me 6 months & now has circulated back with passive aggressive comments via messenger. Needless to say - not responding. I thought - hey after 30+ years - let’s see how she handles this situation. She failed. I’ve known her over 30+ years. A group of us were very good friends with her husband- now passed. I don’t feel the need to continue this pattern of behavior with her anymore.
she used to beat me and tell me i liked it because i would laugh it off, because i really didnt know how to react. it hurt me; and it crushed my soul. i just didnt want to hit her back. its just not who i am. i feel like such an idiot. btw she would tell me constantly what an idiot i was- and it hurt me. and it wasnt ok. i told her that; she didnt change; i was her human punching bag. i feel so stupid.
I understand as I suffered in a similar way. I had to “take what I was given” and even though I knew it was wrong I stayed because I loved him and I thought that with my help I could heal his hurt. I’m so sorry you had to endure such pain. I hope you’re healing now ❤️🩹
Me and my boyfriend has been together for 26 years. I got this gut feeling that he is cheating on me because he is changing he is basically blaming everything on me.
I know you are but what am I. I seriously used to say she acted like a schoolgirl that way. Even even we’d fight I’d say “ could you please just not be so hard on me” she snap back emotionally “NO YOU stop being so hard on ME? Ugh this.was a 46 year old woman with a house and an adult daughter. It was like my daycare job except most of the kids were more cooperative. .
I know my narc ex will be using someone else’s Facebook account to get around the block I have on her because she did this with her exes when I was with her. Now I have a better idea of what to expect from her if I decide to make any posts on Facebook about covert narcissism.
You’re crazy. You’re not well. You need help. The Smear campaign set in years before you know. The antagonising and triggering, leading to Reactive Abuse. Making you doubt your sources and friends and family, saying they aren’t good/ toxic/ not Politically Correct. This was when I was with her. I didn’t directly say to her that I suspected she had a Personality Disorder, let alone Dark Triad Spectrum into Borderline/ NPd. But I did talk about terms like, “Gaslighting. Goal post shifting. Cherry Pickiny. Smear Campaign.” This twigged a wary and almost angry response, an odd mix of surprise and then more shaming. Since being no contact, she knows I now know she was having an affair, and all the lies she told and manipulation. Somehow though, she still acts like it was me who had the issues, and says things like, “If you don’t trust me. Nothing is going on, it’s all in your head,”. She recently tried to contact me after I’ve been three years no contact, with a Crisis Hoover email, wording it in a way to open up a conversation. There was NO love bombing or affection of any kind, it was more passive aggressive and her way of self soothing, her usual, Virtue Signalling, hoping to trigger my empathy and compassion into responding. I simply read and ignored the email and blocked her new email account. I was surprised she tried to contact me, as she knows I know now. But I think this came about out of desperation as her financial resources has been reduced so she is trying to find a source to tap into. Nothing in the email was affectionate or designed to be friendly. She talked to like I was beneath her but she wanted to be reasonable on her terms. Her self delusion and entitlement and thinking people don’t see past her lies is beyond me.
For me the reaction was surprise and panic. Surprise because they basically think your dumb in the first place for getting involved with them and how easy you were to manipulate. Ultimately it lead to her ghosting me because they can’t have anyone in their life who knows how bad they are. You just get replaced by someone who doesn’t know.
Exactly
All of these! Once you learn you can’t unlearn.. it’s there in front of your eyes..
That moment when she was over here and she saw my TH-cam history of narcissism research videos…
😂😂😂
Their rejection is Gods protection. Left and went no contact after divorce was final. I’ve been set free!!!❤🙏✝️🌸
The beauty of going NO CONTACT is that you ALSO don't know if they haven't actually tried to contact you. Backwards as that sounds, it defo helps you move onto your best life quicker.
Over 11 years and a child my experience was everything discussed in this video that led me down a deep dark rabbit hole of self-doubt and severe depression. Final straw being a protective order against me of false accusations and lies. She only had the protection order for herself not our child so I still continued to see my daughter which was 50 to 60% of the time. Then one day she just cut me off completely and that lasted for two months that I did not see my child. Then one day my daughter pretty much just showed up on my doorstep and has been living with me ever since and that's been about 5 months now. The light at the end of the tunnel being I'm about to get custody of my daughter. Currently in progress. The hardest thing I've ever experienced in my life and I don't wish it upon my worst enemy but I am in such a better place than I used to be and I am just working on getting myself back. I will never go backwards ever again with her. It took a while but those feelings are long gone. She lost not me!
You really nailed it...when I caught on, who he really was, he pulled away and I got more distant! We were engaged and lived together. I would question him and say, you are toxic and cruel to me and say such mean hurtful things!
Any way, long story short, he moved out and got engaged 2 months later and then married her, a little while after that. He most likely already had her lined up and ready to be with. They move fast...oh well, he's her problem now!
Exactly. Their relationships get worse as time goes on. They live in shame.
Bullet dodged.
Time will show you it was a blessing in disguise.
The night before she officially ended out marriage she ended it by accident by telling me I needed to find someone who can make me happy. When I questioned her on it and told her she just ended our marriage she said she didn't say that and I misheard her. She did this three more times then became angry as hell started throwing stuff around the house then went back to her old reliable that we needed marriage counseling. She ended it the next morning when I started contacting the guy I found her talking to.
Wow SMH
Wow that stings. You are in hell now but you will bounce back. She's a weight off your shoulder keeping you down. Trust me Bro you'll be fine. Block her on everything so she can't mess with you....cause when her little rebound doesn't work out she'll be straight back to you. You gotta resist her lies and BS. She's already showed you what she's truly like underneath. She didn't leave you for somebody better, she left you for somebody who hasn't seen through her BS yet...yet. He will soon trust me bro. Go see a lawyer and keep yourself right legally cause she will be after your cash and out to ruin you. Especially when you don't take her back it will send her nuts. And if you believe her and take her back she will lose even more respect for you and the abuse will be much worse, leave you suicidal. You stay strong bro you'll get through this. Forget that b^tch, she's pure evil.
I wanted to contact her new supply, but they’ve known each other since they were teens, so I doubt he’d listen to me anyway. I found out she had been in contact with him during our whole relationship as well, despite her claims of not having talked to him in 10 or 15 years (she used both numbers).
@@BJBlaskovichGaming no don't contact him. Cause she's told him you are unstable and crazy and if you send him a message then he will assume she is correct. There's nothing you can do, he has to learn for himself unfortunately. She never loved you cause she doesn't know how to love somebody. She's a souless robot who needs supply. And if you think he's the only guy she's got on the hook you are mad. They have multiple partners at all times. You hit the gym and get your shit together. You'll be back.
@@carlogambino1979 For sure. I’ve let it go.
He said to me when I knew and called him out ( I know I should not have, I could not help myself) “What kind of person do you think I am?” I replied “the kind of person that tells your Postpartum wife “we should go our separate ways” Conveniently after receiving their papers” He most def was not expecting that out of my mouth 😂
I was given the insidious silent treatment for months after I was able to penetrate the mask. I realized then I had been living with a petulant child who blamed me for his bad behavior for 35 years. In the end , he told me he wanted more love in his life and walked out the door right into the house of someone he just met online. Good luck to both of them.
One of my adult daughters is the Narcissist in my Life, and she's been giving me the Silent Treatment since January.
She realized that I Know what she is.
It Really IS Insidious, and I'm only just beginning to enjoy the Peace.
@@carriered4715 I can relate. My first-born adult daughter I went NO CONTACT 4/10 and I have utter peace.
This was the behavior of my so-called fiance. He ended up killing himself because I figured him out and he couldn't get away with his bs anymore. He was a complete narcissist and very mentally ill.
Dang cougar goddess, mannn
Nail on the head. Cold blooded animals. Even though the jig is up, in their own limited poultry way, they will try again. Stay strong survivor, the final discard is your responsibility.
She panicked and attacked me verbally and went on a smear campaign when I found out she didn’t drop me to “be alone” and “work on” herself. She dropped me for her first bf. Did I mention she was legally married the whole 3.5 years she was with me, and still is so despite being with her new bf? Also, she spoke horribly of her husband the whole time she was with me.
Perfectly spoken. Hit the nail on the head…
Very great analysis. I did like you. I closed my purse,my car and stop providing all the wants and needs . I was ghosted for 1 week and the jump was made to my neighbour who is also a narcissist 😂.
😂😂😂 hope they found their karma
Same. They were with the neighbor all along in my case. She was many notches down.
I used to look back on her holding me tenderly as an example of our great love. Now I remember it was because we’d been fighting so pointlessly with her being cruel and refusing to hear me that I finally collapsed down on the floor and started sobbing. I was so broken from trying so hard and realizing that communication or understanding wasn’t something she was interested in.
Of course seeing me revert to a broken sobbing man while she stood dry eyed immediately ended the fight. She’d won. Now I knew that her understanding or compromise wasn’t part of the deal. Only I had to do that ( without fail)
When I found out about her second boyfriend in another city. She said well you weren’t very serious about us. I’d told her she was the love of my life! More than several times. Sober. In the daylight. With clothes on. I meant it too.
What if you enjoy this with someone you're seeing and they say we're only f buddies while being hot and cold? Is that narcissistic too or does he just want a f buddy?
When my narcex learned that I knew what she was/is she went to the total discard…no hoovers, no contact…and moved to another state…she knows that despite deceiving and abusing me for many years it was over…and it is…
I have horror stories, I tried to push them out of my head but they always flood back in it's hard to imagine that some of these things actually happened to me. I will never trust anyone again and that seems completely rational to me.
+Jess Stanley Praise the LORD amen 🙏🏾 Jess Stanley. if you’re in no contact with the narcissists (whether narcissists does the discarding or narcissists is discarded), the narcissist is doing it all: gaslighting, rage, projection, blame shifting, lustbombing, smear campaigning ……etc. absolutely 💯 awesome accuracy as always Jess Stanley 🎊 🎊 🎉 🎉🎉. God bless. Agape love ❤️
He said “wow your mind is so fucked up” when I called him out on his behavior, meanwhile hours beforehand he had me convinced I was going to be hurt by him.
5:01 i don’t think he’ll ever change lmao.
Good to hear you and your truth again
It's THE truth
Their is no MY TRUTH
Thank you for this on point video, Jess. This is so much of what I'm going through and what we talked about during our chat. Still trying to recover. It's a very long and grueling road to heal. 😢
They like to hoover!!!
Not always. Some of them once they know that you know what they are vanish from your life forever. I got immediately discarded and blocked everywhere once I told mine they are a narcissist and they knew I figured them out. It’s been 5 months and radio silence. New supply who replaced me contacted me to tell me how toxic narcissist is and that they dumped narcissist after 3 months. I ran into ex narc outside the gym and laughed in their face as I said “I heard things didn’t work out!!!” They ignored me like I wasn’t there and just ran right into the gym as I was leaving. Good riddance. I’m glad I got that satisfaction of letting them know I know my replacement also failed and was the one to dump them
Not if they've been blocked! They can send as many insidious texts as they want... I never read them!
She lied about what she was doing. Pure evil thank God I never slept with her but she did use me for money. After all I did for her now she is running a smear campaign at my work and we don't even work together WTF. I even work from home and still have no peace.
They love to use us for money and attention
Yup
My Intuition was spot on with my husband's lying, cheating and he discarded me quickly after 12 years. Discarded & Ghosted.
So Evil 😈
Mine just carried on like normal... Just ignored when I pointed it out and flipped it back on me now back to normal like I dont know lol😂
Speechless 🙊 "That's all I got"
Right at the end-visiting his family-he treated me like dirt. And I pushed back -I was so sick of him-I stopped placating him and he screamed at me in the car-have me the silent treatment
I know he tried to use my menopause as a reason why I was off kilter-his sister addressed that….I was counting down the minutes until I had my chance to get out and go NC
I asked because I have received both the yelling screaming and then also the silent treatment
Hovered around for a bit.
👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿JESS TOU ARE THE BEST.
Everything you said was what she did! Trying to gaslight what others told me she was doing! Told everyone I tried to turn her ppl against her! Now she hoped to a 42yr old and she’s 28🙌🏾💪🏾thanks for your clarification
For me, every year that passed for the last 3+ years, I told him that I noticed we were no longer having sex regularly (it became only 1-2 times a year) and he was withholding affection. The last time that I confronted him about it, I exposed him. Without any words being said, it was evident that he was just using me in order to live on my property while he saved up money to move to Mexico. I have recently been discarded. One week ago, he had a dinner date with a Mexican woman who is a single mother whom he hired to clean his apartment in Mexico, and now they are in a relationship.
10.19.24
When the shrink got his diagnosis Narc and i was right all the time.
His eyes turned black in his rage and i ran that evening for my life and never looked back because i knew like he knew that he was a lost cause.
Cold blooded...Like a Lizard. One of those who sits on the fence and flares its throat out looking for attention...lol
😂😂😂
I just ended it today. (June 6th 2023)
Poems i write on ig shows our whole history.
Well...a good deal of it!
I pray i can do this.
Im feeling pretty raw.
I got a poem started at least!
Tonight im on lam.
Im running for my life.
If he comes back, hell finish me off.
His tongue cuts like a knife.
Another great video. Topic is dead on. Wish I would of known before I was discarded. It happened just like you explained. It was one of the worst things that happened to me when I was discarded , but after learning, it was the best thing that happened to me.Thank you for your videos Your knowledge has been so valuable to me. Keep them coming.
I think when she realized I was onto her, she started attempting to go back to “normal” or “nice” mode, she ditched the passive aggressiveness and pretended to just be trying to benefit me in some way. Not sure how jerking me around is benefitting me but whatevs.
In the end people were calling me the phantom wife. I would not go anywhere with him. I stayed home because I knew if I went out with him, he would treat my like crap in public.
Is there something I did that caused someone to be homic*dal towards me? Because what I remember is that a bunch of people I don’t really know started harassing me and intentionally provoking me - lying about me in such egregious ways I was frightened and shocked- and just kept doing it. I am the victim in this situation. And my neighbors are playing D.A.R.V.O = they are the aggressor!!! Killing a woman for nothing = can’t accept those men are misogynistic.
Thanks to your help, it’s like a checklist now. I’m no longer in shock or derailed by these behaviors.
My address book looked like a nuclear test site once I figured them out.
🎉🎉🎉
Perfect Jess....wow
O M G. I remember her saying stuff like that to me. Those why are you with me if you think I could do that. Shit.
EVERYTIME You say they are probably grooming someone else or already had someone else makes Me cry my eyes out And everything You Always hit the effing shit they do are plausibly doing And I know You said it's an Ego bruise for us too And that worries Me that I May be a narcissist Too however I do have empathy 😢 And sympathy And that gives me hope lol It's Just so gut wrenching And I always seem to be sucked back in no matter how I know it's toxic And I'm worth More than this shitty treatment it's Just fucked up And I just can't understand that he or people did This for fun And entertainment 😢 thanks Jess for your channel And sharing your expertise first hand experiences and being You 🙏 XOXO 😘😊
I called a covert straight up a fake with an explanation why she was. She ghosted me 6 months & now has circulated back with passive aggressive comments via messenger. Needless to say - not responding. I thought - hey after 30+ years - let’s see how she handles this situation. She failed. I’ve known her over 30+ years. A group of us were very good friends with her husband- now passed. I don’t feel the need to continue this pattern of behavior with her anymore.
she used to beat me and tell me i liked it because i would laugh it off, because i really didnt know how to react. it hurt me; and it crushed my soul. i just didnt want to hit her back. its just not who i am. i feel like such an idiot. btw she would tell me constantly what an idiot i was- and it hurt me. and it wasnt ok. i told her that; she didnt change; i was her human punching bag. i feel so stupid.
I understand as I suffered in a similar way. I had to “take what I was given” and even though I knew it was wrong I stayed because I loved him and I thought that with my help I could heal his hurt. I’m so sorry you had to endure such pain. I hope you’re healing now ❤️🩹
Some of this isn’t how it happened in my situation. I was told to go tell my victim sob story.
@jess Stanley Blessings and Much Respect 🦁💕🌹🦁
Great video!!
Me and my boyfriend has been together for 26 years. I got this gut feeling that he is cheating on me because he is changing he is basically blaming everything on me.
I know you are but what am I. I seriously used to say she acted like a schoolgirl that way. Even even we’d fight I’d say “ could you please just not be so hard on me” she snap back emotionally “NO YOU stop being so hard on ME? Ugh this.was a 46 year old woman with a house and an adult daughter. It was like my daycare job except most of the kids were more cooperative. .
I know my narc ex will be using someone else’s Facebook account to get around the block I have on her because she did this with her exes when I was with her. Now I have a better idea of what to expect from her if I decide to make any posts on Facebook about covert narcissism.
I've been though breaking stuff and yelling about dum shit
Is it possible for someone to be a covert and over narcissist?
I already told him I know who u are .. after he discarded me ….
Sorry but he don’t deserve me
So he ask me to marry him
You’re crazy.
You’re not well.
You need help.
The Smear campaign set in years before you know.
The antagonising and triggering, leading to Reactive Abuse.
Making you doubt your sources and friends and family, saying they aren’t good/ toxic/ not Politically Correct.
This was when I was with her.
I didn’t directly say to her that I suspected she had a Personality Disorder, let alone Dark Triad Spectrum into Borderline/ NPd. But I did talk about terms like,
“Gaslighting. Goal post shifting. Cherry Pickiny. Smear Campaign.”
This twigged a wary and almost angry response, an odd mix of surprise and then more shaming.
Since being no contact, she knows I now know she was having an affair, and all the lies she told and manipulation. Somehow though, she still acts like it was me who had the issues, and says things like,
“If you don’t trust me. Nothing is going on, it’s all in your head,”.
She recently tried to contact me after I’ve been three years no contact, with a Crisis Hoover email, wording it in a way to open up a conversation.
There was NO love bombing or affection of any kind, it was more passive aggressive and her way of self soothing, her usual, Virtue Signalling, hoping to trigger my empathy and compassion into responding.
I simply read and ignored the email and blocked her new email account.
I was surprised she tried to contact me, as she knows I know now.
But I think this came about out of desperation as her financial resources has been reduced so she is trying to find a source to tap into.
Nothing in the email was affectionate or designed to be friendly. She talked to like I was beneath her but she wanted to be reasonable on her terms.
Her self delusion and entitlement and thinking people don’t see past her lies is beyond me.
Narc Amnesia 🤣 I spit my drink.......lol Narcnesia
Damn!! Why didn't I think of that!! Haha that's amazing!
@@JessStanley we wont tell anyone where you got it😉
Hovered around for a bit.