An ex co-worker of mine lived with his parents until he was 50. Didn't even know how to pay his power bill after he moved out. Only moved out after mom died and he was forced to move. Sad sad sad
I am a Chinese, and i had to fight to move out of my parents place when i was 25. My mom thinks i should not be living on my own before marriage. Eventually, i decided to migrate to another country, so i can get away with them. My parents did not talk to me for two years, as they were so disappointed with me.
We were all talking at work one time about leaving home being on our own. My co-worker said she came from a large family, she was the eldest and the first to leave home at 18. Then she came back, left, came back again. Her father then said that she was setting a bad example for her 10+ siblings and told her to choose carefully where she lands next because she can't come back. She said it was one of the most sobering , first grown up moment of her life. She managed to manage, and later thanked her father for helping her grow all the way up.
I’m going through the same thing. I left at 18 came back, left and now I’m back. I’m 21 and was telling my mom I want to move out again and said if I do I can’t come back again.
@@13tvmusic You have to set an example for your younger siblings. It's time to launch yourself into the world and become your own person, apart from your parents and siblings. It's time to prepare to grow up and possibly create your own family unit in time. It's not the time to look back, it's time to go forward and be an adult. I know it's scary, I was on my own at 17, I was still in high school. Yeah I was scared, but I was brave enough to do it, had a job, paid rent, but I had the freedom to shape my own life, and after looking back I was never sorry for it. It served me well to be self reliant emotionally, money wise, and in every other way. My brother was on his own at 16. It's not like my parents didn't care, they just let us go when we wanted to, because they raised us to be independent.
@@13tvmusic I did the same thing, I circled back to the nest once and then remembered why I left so early in the first place. Never went back again. I guess my parents did grow me up.
This is nothing. My 61year old brother and his 62 year old wife lives with my 86 year old mother. The wife does not work, she stays in a bedroom watching tv all day. I fight with my mother constantly about this.
My ex has been living with his parents from age 30-42 and hasnt worked in 18m, and his younger sisters are living at home too. Now his parents are paying his child support for him. My 13+16yr old sons are far more mature. Yet they keep pointing fingers and saying im a bad parent. Yeah, ok. Finish raising your 42yr old kid first.
Wow, my story is so similar. I left home eight years ago and couldn't be happier to be on my own. Unfortunately my brothers are 32 and are still supported by my parents at home. And yes, they are emotionally dependant on my mom for everything unfortunately. And she agrees with keeping them dependant. From my research I found that enablers are not nice but abusive because they discourage an independent life. This is toxic behaviour. 😯
I have 3 brothers like that living at home. The 33 year old one never left and is emotionally attached to mom for everything. And he throws a fit if his clothes food is not done. Im like do it yourself.
I am 29 , and my unemployed brother (27) is living with my parents... getting a wage from my father to help in the family farm. No independence, never had to support himself one day in his life... it drives me insane.
Woah I never thought of enablers as bein "abusive". But I guess in a very selfish way they dont want that other person to be independent and self sufficient.
I have a childhood friend I grew up with in the 1960's & 70's who never left home & still lives at home with parents to this day. He never left the nest.
37 years old and still living at home?! Good grief!! I was out at 18 because I wanted to be an adult. I moved back home when I was 20, but only because I got sick and needed a lot of help. However, my parents gave me an ultimatum. As soon as I was medically cleared, I had to do at least one of three things- A) go back to school, B) find a job, or C) do community service. I also had to obey all the house rules. If I didn't, I'd find my stuff on the curb, and I'd have to go live somewhere else. Being the smart, respectful, driven young adult that I was, I did all of those things, and I am now out on my own, working, happily married, and taking online classes to be a veterinary technician- a dream that I have been dying to chase for many years. All this because my parents gave me a little guidance and pushed me to move on with my life.
Freedom and Independence are the greatest gift a parent can give a child. There’s a feeling and a rush you get with this freedom. They’ll never know it. 😞
WOW just stumbled on this video. This is almost exactly like my wife's 2 brothers, except they're 37 and 41. EXACTLY. Just like Dave said, the mother is a horrible enabler, as are my in-laws. Likewise my mother in law is a super nice lady. Its really sad, because both the parents and 2 brothers lives are destroyed. At 37 & 41 and still at home, there is almost no way they'll ever reach independence. My wife and I are on baby step 4, and we regularly talk about how horrible the situation is. We can't do a thing about this, and neither can this guy.
My whole life growing up my mom said I could live with her for as long as I wanted. But as I grew up I realized my mom was awful with money and I can't really listen to the advice she gives. So I started my own cleaning company at 18 and have been becoming more self reliant ever since despite what my mother may want.
Same situation with my family. My brother and sister 33,36 live at home. But my brother pays everything except house note (dad pays it) sisters in debt. I'm 21 I left to become a Truck Driver and that's what I am doing now.
I moved out at 18 married less than a yr later did our stupidness and also became truck drivers (have been for 6 yrs) now following D.R. and getting our stupidness paid currently bs2 but goal for Nov to be bs3
There is nothing wrong with grown children living at home if they are working or going to school. It is only a problem if the children are not working and living off the parents.
agreed. I'm turning 24 in a couple of months, living at home but I just graduated college and am working full time as a software developer while I pay off my 72K in student debt
@MITLOML most Spanish house holds like mine we stay with the parents even after 25 because of saving up money plus if the parents don’t care it’s a win win.
It makes you wonder... having the same parents (and therefore a mostly similar upbringing), how is it that one turns out independent and the other two are co-dependent?
+jcb3393 Same parents does not mean the same upbringing. Every parent with more than one child has a favorite child weather they realize it or not. In some family's it gets really bad. It gets really really bad when one of the children is the scapegoat for the rest of the family.
I think a lot of it has to do with external influences. There are others that influence kids beyond the parents. Their friends. Teachers. Adult role models (Pastor, Scout leader, Coach, et al). Some of the most influential people in my young life have never met my younger siblings.
Had a friend like this, her 2 grown sons both, both almost my age, live at home. Not only they still live at home but their home is fill with their own families too and their mom still pays all their bills. I use to tell her she needs to let them go out and experience life and be on their own, she refuses to accept that reality.
Thank you Dave...I grew up in a very sheltered household... Always being told what not to do. Don't do this, don't watch that, don't listen to that junk on the radio... I don't have many memories of being encouraged in the other direction, just a lot of "Thou Shalt Nots".. and yet my parents really are very very "nice" and wholesome. My mom is literally becoming the sweet little old lady you meet at the supermarket. My dad never raised his voice at anyone, never had any alcohol, cigarettes or drugs in his life, never cheated on my mom. I just feel like they didn't prepare me for what the world was really like. I had a job working about 35 hours per week, with benefits, and lost it after almost 7 years because of back problems (caused by the job) and arthritis in both knees (I'm in my mid-30s, not exactly old yet). Except for living in their house, I pay all my own bills, take care of my car, have my own phone plan etc, thank God for an index fund that pays good. I help around the house with the chores, I try not to be a freeloader. I'm looking for work so I can get out on my own, but I physically am unable to do most of the work I'm actually qualified for, and some days I just want to self destruct. Most entry level jobs dont pay nearly enough to keep up with the cost of living. I'm a college grad and people expect me to be happy with high school wages. It's only slightly better than actual slavery. It's very depressing to be in this type of situation, my heart goes out to those who are really trying and not getting anywhere. P.s. I love the Volunteer gear!
My cousin's son and daughter are in their mid 40s and still live at home, trooping to church with their mommy and daddy twice a week since babyhood. Both work in low skill jobs but are childish and naive. Narcissistic personality disorder runs down that side of my family--both of our mothers have it and have ruined their families. It recently hit me like a ton of bricks that my cousin displays narcissistic traits and has been controlling her kids to feel powerful.
This hit close to home. I am the normal functioning adult and both my siblings still live at home. My parents enable them. One is 19 still going to college and doesn't try to land a part time job. The other one is 24 and is horrible with money and other problems. They all don't want my option and bark me off. I'm like you all need counseling. It's so dysfunctional in that household.
Kick them out. If they are working full time, paying (full market rate) rent, etc to help pay off the parent's mortgage because the parent's are struggling... then I'd understand. But not working, not contributing, above 16 in age, when the mother is working and able to pay her own mortgage... nope.
My brother in law (45), his wife (35), and their daughter (9), all live together in a small condo with my husband's parents, living off the old couple's retirement (that's the only source of income to pay bills since nobody works). My husband and I have talked to them about it, trying to address how harmful this situation is for them and for all of us, and they stopped seeing us. Their excuse is: my sister in law is Asian and that's how Asians live. They live in the USA. It has been this way for the past 10 years.
@@grayandgray yes, weird, nobody works and they all live off my parents in law's retirement... and just to clarify, the only Asian in there is the sister in law, the rest of them are all Americans.
His Mom evidently never listened to him before so why would he expect her listen to him now?!!! His Mother seriously needs help & his siblings have a serious sense of entitlement!! These people are leaches and they will never "leave the nest"!!!
My mom is so much like the what the caller described. The hardest thing that I've had to face with my mother is making her see the light in what she's doing is actually harmful and not helpful in what she's not only done to me, but my sister as well.
I resent that last comment. I’m 28 and I still live at home. I’ve got a full-time job and I pay utilities, groceries, etc. but I’m just saving rent. I’m an only child and it’s either stay in my bedroom or pay >$1000/month in rent for lesser accommodations. I know someone else who’s slightly over 30 who has 2 jobs and lives at home too. She’s the nicest person and manages well for herself. It’s fine in some situations.
With your parents subsidizing your (rent) expenses you are not fully financially independent. Your parents are still fronting the bill, even if only in part. Some adult children and parents may willfully choose to prolong the adolescence period in an effort to "help" but not everyone wants to (or should).
@@Bindi_Marc this doesn’t make sense. U lived in your parents house for 18 years, they paid mortgage or rent, it’s not bam once your 18 your causing them more money. Your staying in the same room not costing them anymore. And this guys is pay utilities and food so it’s not like he’s burdening his parents.
My mother and father let my sister do this, learned helplessness, quit high school, never got her GED. She is now fifty four years old, now both my parents have passed away, my sister is living in their old home place, we as her siblings can not settle my mothers estate because she would be homeless, she has no income, is severely depressed needs life coaching and therapy, but cannot listen to solid advice to move forward in life and is living in monetary handouts from family to pay her monthly expensess.
Oh yeah, I used to have a co-worker who was 40 and she was still with her parents, and was working very part time. I'm sure they paid for her car and insurances and everything else cause her pay could TOTALLY not pay for much at all.
When I was fresh out of high school I got a job right away and my parents charged me rent to live with them. They where teaching me responsibility. And then eventually I was able to get my own place and pay rent on my own and then I became a homeowner.
Ive never had more than 1000 in debt and been out of debt for years. This is so easy. Pay your bills then pretend that you make 7.25 and live off of the least that you can evvverrryytime. Not sometimes everyttimmeeeeee. I only like dave Ramsey because he encourages me to do what I've done before i ever heard of him.
The barrio culture is much like this, my parents detested it. Grown 50 year people still depending on their Mom or abuelita (grandma) to balance their accounts and pay the bills for them. It happens a lot.
Why do you care that much?... as long as your happy with the situation you are in that’s what matters most.... if they are happy with what they are doing then good for them...... control what you can control
they are comfortable. I know friends who been living with parents since college 10 years... and when I talk to them about roommates, moving, taking different jobs they basicallly say everything is too expensive...and then go on vacations and trips. military could have helped both those two with just 4 years.. what happens if she dies.
What happens if Mom dies is that these two are going to find themselves utterly without the emotional or physical resources to support themselves, and trying to find a job when you're in your 30s and haven't worked is next to impossible. These two will have to try to get on some sort of disability and prove that they are too emotionally fragile to work. Or they can try to find another relative to take over their support besides their brother who isn't going to you can bet. I have extended family with a similar situation that I worry about night and day.
Lee Leonard if she’s pretty she can find a man if she really needs to. That was the plan of several of my high school classmates - get married, never work a day.
lovethemflowers this is true yes. But what if this job you are speaking of doesn't pay enough to live on? What happens then? And the point I'm trying to make is 2 incomes are better than one.
Gee Cee That would be just as bad, because chances are, they will carry over that same behavior ( lying around the house, not helping with cooking and cleaning, etc.) over to their significant other's place.
Hysterical. Share the video with her and have her read the comments. Listen if your son gets a job and is chipping in or saving towards his own place then that’s different
Reminds me of my situation. My mother was to leave us each a property. Since I was the child she was closest to and we did things for one another, while my sister has mostly been absent until my mother started showing signs of dementia - my mother has decided to give my sister a property now and I can wait until my mother (and myself possibly are dead). I will qualify it by saying that my mother lives in the house she was to leave me and I don’t expect for her to leave just to make things even. But, I also know that she is using the dynamic to ding me over the head for being independent, opinionated, and not obedient. This is a narcissistic relationship and there’s a BEVY about that on YT. Of course, as I am the child with the most skill, she is trying to hoover me and keep me in the family in case she or my sister need anything. I’ve got to this point because, what I’m trying to say is that the caller needs to be glad that he lives in another state and he may be best breaking all contact with his family. Why? Because he has to look forward to the possible dynamic that I also see myself in and looking ahead to. That you may be both hated and depended upon. That you may be devalued, while being dictated to and controlled so you can “become of use” to them, while you get no credit for it. That they can, at the same time, feel jealous of you and arrogant about what they’ve been able to get away with. When your mother passes and they have nothing in life but what she left them (she may leave you nothing because you’re smarty pants), your siblings may, without hesitation, look to you for experience in managing their lives, finances and even sheltering and feeding them. As far as they may be concerned, you’re all in this together - once SHTF.
By the way, while I may not have the facts right, unless my sister is able to afford to live in that house on her 2-4 jobs or if my mother pumps in money, I expect that there will be a tax sale in less than a year. My sister knows nothing about home ownership, maintenance and costs. I’d asked my mother several times, before this turn of events, to tell my sister about the property taxes. She didn’t want to. Go figure.
I get why this guy has some resentment even though he is better off. I have lived out of home since 18 and I see some other people who never have to worry if the landlord will ask you to move out because housing is stable and rarely get stressed about financial stability/income (I dont have debt but you don't need to to worry) and I can see why them having it easy (if somewhat toxic) is annoying.
My sister does the same to my parents is in one of there rentals has a family paying 400 rent which normally would be 1400. Completely taking advantage of them it’s so annoying especially since she is older and has never been out in the real world I don’t know what they would do if they ever got cut off
Dave always has such great advice, however, I think in this instance he misunderstood what the caller was looking for. The caller already knew how dysfunctional the situation was and that he couldn't do anything about it, I think he was more wondering how he could personally move on or let go of his resentment towards his family members. But I think Dave was so quick to jump on the bashing bandwagon that he never really heard that that's what the caller was seeking.
I think the caller needed someone else [an outsider] to validate the fact that what was going on with his siblings was insane. I have an extended family member who is in her mid 20s and never held a job, failed the certification for her degree program and quit the only job she's had after 4 hours. Her future is bleak, and it troubles me thinking of what's going to happen to her in the years to come. Currently she and her chronically ill mother are being supported by the elderly grandmother, but what they'll do when she can no longer afford it is something I worry about probably more than they do.
My impression: he heard the caller's resentment and jealousy and moved to stomp it hard. Dave wanted to remind him that's nothing to envy, even if your 8 year old self pokes his whiny head up.
@@cookiegirl2cookie197yes this is the answer people can’t seem to understand! It’s heartbreaking watching aging parents being bled dry and taken advantage of
I have 2 nieces that are in their 30's that still live at home ... they've never had a full-time job. they pay alittle rent, but that's it. One of them parties at night and sleeps during the day. So sad to watch. Parents enables them so that they can never be independent. I can't say anything, as it would put a wedge between us.
No family lives in a vacuum. Thirty-six-year-old brother and 31-year-old sister still living at home means that 18 years ago, this man's neighbors, childhood friends and his immediate family all watched his mother (no mention of his father) FAIL her firstborn son, his older brother, straight out of high school and said nothing, with the elder brother's childhood friends all moving on or whatever and leaving him be. Thirteen years ago, this man's neighbors, childhood friends and his immediate family all watched his mother (no mention of his father) FAIL her second-born, his middle sister, straight out of high school behind the elder brother and said NOTHING, with THIS sister's childhood friends all moving on or whatever and leaving her be. This man, the third-born, KNOWING his mother (no mention of his father) wasn't going to encourage, enable or in ANY way contribute to HIM get out on his own and away from her after high school, come 18, HAD WORKED HIS WAY OUT OF HER HOUSE on his own merit and has stayed out on his own merit. Who does that leave to care enough to free the stuck elder siblings from his stunting codependent mother that saw but didn't care 18 years ago? No one. All this man can do to save himself embarrassment is cut them off and leave them be.
+Clayton Crider I actually LISTEN to videos before I comment. Adam begins at :54: "It -- It kind of wears on me and it has been over the years because I've always worked since I was a teenager, and I'm 32. I have my own house, I've actually -- this is my second house that I'm in, you know, I live -- another state away. But I -- I feel a little resentment...." The discussion that follows proves Adam is not feeling a little resentment, but a lot of EMBARRASSMENT, which is the state of being caused to feel self-conscious or ill at ease, disconcerted. Dave qualifies this incorrectly applied emotion at 1:15: "I wouldn't feel resentment, I would feel pity!" which is sorrow or grief aroused by the misfortune of another: compassion for suffering; and is synonymous with commiseration, sympathy, condolence and empathy. EMBARRASSMENT in its truest sense is pity with no solution. But observe, please, how Dave's lengthy empathetic response to Adam's subject then proceeds to reflect every bit of Adam's EMBARRASSMENT back to him over his stuck older brother and sister and the mother that has kept them emotionally stunted for 36 years. Now, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to subtract the 36-year-old brother and 31-year-old sister's present-day circumstance of still living in their mother's house from their failure to have moved out on their own 18 and 13 years earlier to deduce all I have in my response. Also, could Dave in all his commiseration, sympathy, condolence and empathy offer Adam a solution to the mother that has thrown her older son and daughter's lives away on her stronger need to remain mama to minor children and the stunted siblings that have permitted her? Nope. Like I said: EMBARRASSMENT over which Dave could only offer Adam useless pity. So, for you applying the logical workings of my mind to suggesting I speak of my own circumstance of being a 36-year-old man or a 31-year-old woman still living in my mother's house by asking me why care what other people think of me proves you too dumb first to ask if I'm a 36-year-old man or a 31-year-old woman!
I still like the idea of charging something but maybe you’re putting it aside for them when they do move. Because I have personally seen that if you don’t charge them anything then they’ll start to get complacent and start taking advantage of the situation.
You have to take the 30,000 foot view on this issue. "Resentment" snowballs in these situations. The hostility, anger, bitterness, frustration, creates a wedge in this family, people avoid each other, who will care for Mom when she can't care for herself, and then after Mom dies there will be a nuclear war between the 3 siblings. All because Mom has enabled two lazy humans to take advantage of her, while the other is being responsible and accountable. While fair is not always equal, parents should be funneling equal amounts of dollars $$$ to the responsible kids making it on their own. When things are transparent with $$ and time, then you can avoid resentment and most of the harm to the family.
I worked with someone like that, she was 35 living with her parents bt she said it was so she could get out of debt n buy a house that she was in the process of buying
+Vydio That's beside the point. These kids should have left home a long time ago. Whether dad is in the picture or not doesn't change that. How can a person feel like an independent adult while still living at home? In my opinion, they can't.
I would love to see a day in their lives I went from a failure to launch to my mother being financially dependant on me so there was drama when I left I feel I should have stockpiled cash to buy my way out of the drama that way I could be on my own but not leave my mother high and dry
Not everyone 30+ yrs old still living with parents is failing... I'm 31 living with my dad and building up 3 companies as an entrepreneur. What is wrong with that? You people that think everyone has to move out at 18 or any other age are insane. Where is that a rule? I'm getting along just fine.
Ehh its how western society is they put up this big notion that "you have to move out at 18 & be independent". Okay but do you know the situation this person is maybe people want their parents with them to take care of them Cuhz they took care of you, it's not a bad thing at all. Family is always there to help yet some people don't have a good family.. So many factors go into a certain persons life oh well what can we do lol.
I have a family friend who lived with his parents until he was 40 simply because he wasn't married & is incredibly frugal. When he moved out he bought a house for cash. He's now married & was able to retire at 55 as a multi millionaire. Not for everyone, but it sure did work for him!
So long as you contribute to maintaining the household by paying rent or taking over paying other bills, I see no problem with your situation. The issue with the caller is that his siblings did nothing and contributed nothing. Like Dave said, they were basically still acting like teens. What's going to happen to them if their mother drops dead or loses her job and they have no job skills? Chances are the siblings are either introverts, shy or something like that where they don't want to leave the nest, but the mother's enabling them to postpone getting their own life is a huge disservice to them.
Remember that there are lots of homeless living on the streets of America, I always wonder as where are their families, just a different point of view guys
In many countries of the world including my own, children and parents often live in the same household. Most of people I know either still live in the same house with their parents or have inherited an apartment if they live apart. That's why we usually build houses that have several stories and apartments in it so there is at least some kind of separation.
My son lives with me but he contributes and works I am glad he lives with me but we coexist and he’s been saving he has 130 k is a nurse so it works well for the both of us
They probably do not know they don’t work...meaning they stay there to help mom out! They’ll try and justify every way they can to act as though they contribute much more than they do!
This guy just needs to cut ties. You don't owe your family anything and this idea that a man like this must anchor his life because people he's related to are useless is stupid. Bluntly tell Mom that 30+ year olds without jobs and still dependent on their parents without working a plan to become independent are people you can't respect. Hence, if she is going to allow them to be of such low character, you will not be around them. You will also not help her in anyway that also helps them as they are freeloading bums.
Actually my mother in law asks her children to pay bills for her expenses as a treat off living with her. So she saves tons of money. They share phone, water, electricity, car insurance, property taxes, home remodeling cost, and appliances, etc.
"she messed up their lives...their emotional state has been held back" Dave is absolutely right
Instablaster.
An ex co-worker of mine lived with his parents until he was 50. Didn't even know how to pay his power bill after he moved out. Only moved out after mom died and he was forced to move. Sad sad sad
fake news!
I've seen this as well. They struggle horribly because their parents did nothing to prepare them.
The barrio can be just like this
That's what happens. They won't move unless they are FORCED to!
I have a 50+ relative still living with mom and dad. Never held more than part time jobs. It's pretty pathetic.
The job of a parent is to teach their child, by the time he or she is in their late teens, how to live without parents.
I worked since I was 14 but I wasnt preparing to be and adult :(
I am a Chinese, and i had to fight to move out of my parents place when i was 25. My mom thinks i should not be living on my own before marriage. Eventually, i decided to migrate to another country, so i can get away with them. My parents did not talk to me for two years, as they were so disappointed with me.
how often do u talk to your extended famikly in china?
I'm Nigerian and 24 years old. My situation is similar but not as extreme. Non western parents want their kids to stay at home for some reason
Fascinating.. what kinda of chinese r u? Han? Tibetan?
Kenny aka TI Not just non-Western. I'm black American, and my family was the exact same way.
You did right, and it's great you're making it on your own.
My mom was an enabler to my brother, coddling him until he OD'd. I had enough and left home at 20, never went back.
Ofc😊
We were all talking at work one time about leaving home being on our own. My co-worker said she came from a large family, she was the eldest and the first to leave home at 18. Then she came back, left, came back again. Her father then said that she was setting a bad example for her 10+ siblings and told her to choose carefully where she lands next because she can't come back. She said it was one of the most sobering , first grown up moment of her life. She managed to manage, and later thanked her father for helping her grow all the way up.
I’m going through the same thing. I left at 18 came back, left and now I’m back. I’m 21 and was telling my mom I want to move out again and said if I do I can’t come back again.
For me it’s just hard leaving your younger sibling with all the memories you made
@@13tvmusic You have to set an example for your younger siblings. It's time to launch yourself into the world and become your own person, apart from your parents and siblings. It's time to prepare to grow up and possibly create your own family unit in time. It's not the time to look back, it's time to go forward and be an adult. I know it's scary, I was on my own at 17, I was still in high school. Yeah I was scared, but I was brave enough to do it, had a job, paid rent, but I had the freedom to shape my own life, and after looking back I was never sorry for it. It served me well to be self reliant emotionally, money wise, and in every other way. My brother was on his own at 16. It's not like my parents didn't care, they just let us go when we wanted to, because they raised us to be independent.
@@13tvmusic I did the same thing, I circled back to the nest once and then remembered why I left so early in the first place. Never went back again. I guess my parents did grow me up.
@@pjgumby I needed to hear this. Thank you
This is nothing. My 61year old brother and his 62 year old wife lives with my 86 year old mother. The wife does not work, she stays in a bedroom watching tv all day. I fight with my mother constantly about this.
wow that's insane
😳😳😳
Give me this is not true for a thousand
How messed up can people's lives get?
My ex has been living with his parents from age 30-42 and hasnt worked in 18m, and his younger sisters are living at home too. Now his parents are paying his child support for him. My 13+16yr old sons are far more mature. Yet they keep pointing fingers and saying im a bad parent. Yeah, ok. Finish raising your 42yr old kid first.
Did you get the house, alimony and child support in the divorce?
@@KhoalBishop I don't think they got married
@@esonon5210hope not
Wheb wete u 2gether
Wow, my story is so similar. I left home eight years ago and couldn't be happier to be on my own. Unfortunately my brothers are 32 and are still supported by my parents at home. And yes, they are emotionally dependant on my mom for everything unfortunately. And she agrees with keeping them dependant. From my research I found that enablers are not nice but abusive because they discourage an independent life. This is toxic behaviour. 😯
I have 3 brothers like that living at home. The 33 year old one never left and is emotionally attached to mom for everything. And he throws a fit if his clothes food is not done. Im like do it yourself.
I am 29 , and my unemployed brother (27) is living with my parents... getting a wage from my father to help in the family farm. No independence, never had to support himself one day in his life... it drives me insane.
Woah I never thought of enablers as bein "abusive".
But I guess in a very selfish way they dont want that other person to be independent and self sufficient.
What will happen when "Mum" is no longer around?
Not nice but abusive... Never thought of it that way but so true!
I have a childhood friend I grew up with in the 1960's & 70's who never left home & still lives at home with parents to this day. He never left the nest.
Some birds don't make it, it's true.
Living at home is one thing but not to work and contribute to the mortgage and household expenses is another.
😂 like wtfudge!
37 years old and still living at home?! Good grief!! I was out at 18 because I wanted to be an adult. I moved back home when I was 20, but only because I got sick and needed a lot of help. However, my parents gave me an ultimatum. As soon as I was medically cleared, I had to do at least one of three things- A) go back to school, B) find a job, or C) do community service. I also had to obey all the house rules. If I didn't, I'd find my stuff on the curb, and I'd have to go live somewhere else. Being the smart, respectful, driven young adult that I was, I did all of those things, and I am now out on my own, working, happily married, and taking online classes to be a veterinary technician- a dream that I have been dying to chase for many years. All this because my parents gave me a little guidance and pushed me to move on with my life.
Freedom and Independence are the greatest gift a parent can give a child. There’s a feeling and a rush you get with this freedom. They’ll never know it. 😞
Sadly, i have a brother like this, older than me, almost 40 and lives at home, no job, and this is so frustrating and sad.
WOW just stumbled on this video. This is almost exactly like my wife's 2 brothers, except they're 37 and 41. EXACTLY. Just like Dave said, the mother is a horrible enabler, as are my in-laws. Likewise my mother in law is a super nice lady. Its really sad, because both the parents and 2 brothers lives are destroyed. At 37 & 41 and still at home, there is almost no way they'll ever reach independence.
My wife and I are on baby step 4, and we regularly talk about how horrible the situation is. We can't do a thing about this, and neither can this guy.
My whole life growing up my mom said I could live with her for as long as I wanted. But as I grew up I realized my mom was awful with money and I can't really listen to the advice she gives. So I started my own cleaning company at 18 and have been becoming more self reliant ever since despite what my mother may want.
Same situation with my family. My brother and sister 33,36 live at home. But my brother pays everything except house note (dad pays it) sisters in debt. I'm 21 I left to become a Truck Driver and that's what I am doing now.
Jack Cannon my man.
Good for you. Do you like truck driving?
DD is considering it.
DD? Dead daughter?
I moved out at 18 married less than a yr later did our stupidness and also became truck drivers (have been for 6 yrs) now following D.R. and getting our stupidness paid currently bs2 but goal for Nov to be bs3
Apparently there have been 25 enablers who don't like this clip.
Hahahaha 25 people who have their 50 year old children living with them.
There is nothing wrong with grown children living at home if they are working or going to school. It is only a problem if the children are not working and living off the parents.
agreed. I'm turning 24 in a couple of months, living at home but I just graduated college and am working full time as a software developer while I pay off my 72K in student debt
Or if there 36
@MITLOML most Spanish house holds like mine we stay with the parents even after 25 because of saving up money plus if the parents don’t care it’s a win win.
@MITLOML no, 25 is still young. Currently 21, I’m not moving out till about 30 or so when I get married. Gotta save/invest money
It makes you wonder... having the same parents (and therefore a mostly similar upbringing), how is it that one turns out independent and the other two are co-dependent?
+jcb3393
Same parents does not mean the same upbringing. Every parent with more than one child has a favorite child weather they realize it or not. In some family's it gets really bad. It gets really really bad when one of the children is the scapegoat for the rest of the family.
Influence comes from more adults than just parents. Many of my friends' parents, my teachers, and adults in my church also raised me right. :)
Come from a similar situation... there was nooo place for me anymore so I HAD to move out, didn't even had the option to stay.
D T you are the lucky one
I think a lot of it has to do with external influences. There are others that influence kids beyond the parents. Their friends. Teachers. Adult role models (Pastor, Scout leader, Coach, et al). Some of the most influential people in my young life have never met my younger siblings.
Had a friend like this, her 2 grown sons both, both almost my age, live at home. Not only they still live at home but their home is fill with their own families too and their mom still pays all their bills. I use to tell her she needs to let them go out and experience life and be on their own, she refuses to accept that reality.
Thank you Dave...I grew up in a very sheltered household... Always being told what not to do. Don't do this, don't watch that, don't listen to that junk on the radio... I don't have many memories of being encouraged in the other direction, just a lot of "Thou Shalt Nots".. and yet my parents really are very very "nice" and wholesome. My mom is literally becoming the sweet little old lady you meet at the supermarket. My dad never raised his voice at anyone, never had any alcohol, cigarettes or drugs in his life, never cheated on my mom. I just feel like they didn't prepare me for what the world was really like.
I had a job working about 35 hours per week, with benefits, and lost it after almost 7 years because of back problems (caused by the job) and arthritis in both knees (I'm in my mid-30s, not exactly old yet). Except for living in their house, I pay all my own bills, take care of my car, have my own phone plan etc, thank God for an index fund that pays good. I help around the house with the chores, I try not to be a freeloader. I'm looking for work so I can get out on my own, but I physically am unable to do most of the work I'm actually qualified for, and some days I just want to self destruct. Most entry level jobs dont pay nearly enough to keep up with the cost of living. I'm a college grad and people expect me to be happy with high school wages. It's only slightly better than actual slavery. It's very depressing to be in this type of situation, my heart goes out to those who are really trying and not getting anywhere.
P.s. I love the Volunteer gear!
I came home for the summer after my freshman year in college and immediately knew it was time to move out...
Same situation at my Mom's house with my 57 yr. old Brother! Can you believe it?!!!
WOW, really?
pjgumby
He thinks?!!!!
Sorry to hear.
Marlena Bontas
Mom allows to go on in the home!!!
Yes. My uncle but he works and maintains her property and contributes.
my graduation gift was my diploma qnd my mom telling me my rent is 100 a week and due monday.
My ex in-laws kids still live at home aged 56-54 and 50 with a 15 year old grandchild,
Now that is messy
🤦♀️
When he asked, "what's wrong with them?" I cracked up laughing so much.
My cousin's son and daughter are in their mid 40s and still live at home, trooping to church with their mommy and daddy twice a week since babyhood. Both work in low skill jobs but are childish and naive. Narcissistic personality disorder runs down that side of my family--both of our mothers have it and have ruined their families. It recently hit me like a ton of bricks that my cousin displays narcissistic traits and has been controlling her kids to feel powerful.
This hit close to home. I am the normal functioning adult and both my siblings still live at home. My parents enable them. One is 19 still going to college and doesn't try to land a part time job. The other one is 24 and is horrible with money and other problems. They all don't want my option and bark me off. I'm like you all need counseling. It's so dysfunctional in that household.
19 and going to college is not that dysfunctional Esme :)
Was about to say the same. Ideally you should work while in college but sometimes it's hard specially if you're a STEM major
Kick them out.
If they are working full time, paying (full market rate) rent, etc to help pay off the parent's mortgage because the parent's are struggling... then I'd understand.
But not working, not contributing, above 16 in age, when the mother is working and able to pay her own mortgage... nope.
My friend lived at home till 50 yrs old when his mom died. Life gone 65%
My brother in law (45), his wife (35), and their daughter (9), all live together in a small condo with my husband's parents, living off the old couple's retirement (that's the only source of income to pay bills since nobody works). My husband and I have talked to them about it, trying to address how harmful this situation is for them and for all of us, and they stopped seeing us. Their excuse is: my sister in law is Asian and that's how Asians live. They live in the USA. It has been this way for the past 10 years.
Weird. Asians do often live communally, but everybody works!
@@grayandgray yes, weird, nobody works and they all live off my parents in law's retirement... and just to clarify, the only Asian in there is the sister in law, the rest of them are all Americans.
as a wise karate master once said, no bad student only bad teacher
His Mom evidently never listened to him before so why would he expect her listen to him now?!!! His Mother seriously needs help & his siblings have a serious sense of entitlement!! These people are leaches and they will never "leave the nest"!!!
“Enablers are the sweetest people you will ever meet... that’s why I can never be an enabler.” *LOL ME TO A T*
My mom is so much like the what the caller described. The hardest thing that I've had to face with my mother is making her see the light in what she's doing is actually harmful and not helpful in what she's not only done to me, but my sister as well.
I resent that last comment. I’m 28 and I still live at home. I’ve got a full-time job and I pay utilities, groceries, etc. but I’m just saving rent. I’m an only child and it’s either stay in my bedroom or pay >$1000/month in rent for lesser accommodations. I know someone else who’s slightly over 30 who has 2 jobs and lives at home too. She’s the nicest person and manages well for herself. It’s fine in some situations.
So it's ok for you to not pay rent or a mortgage but ok for your parents while you get to stockpile money? That sounds lovely.
With your parents subsidizing your (rent) expenses you are not fully financially independent. Your parents are still fronting the bill, even if only in part. Some adult children and parents may willfully choose to prolong the adolescence period in an effort to "help" but not everyone wants to (or should).
@@Bindi_Marc this doesn’t make sense. U lived in your parents house for 18 years, they paid mortgage or rent, it’s not bam once your 18 your causing them more money. Your staying in the same room not costing them anymore. And this guys is pay utilities and food so it’s not like he’s burdening his parents.
when their only skill set is Mario at another level you've got a problem 😂😂😂
My mother and father let my sister do this, learned helplessness, quit high school, never got her GED. She is now fifty four years old, now both my parents have passed away, my sister is living in their old home place, we as her siblings can not settle my mothers estate because she would be homeless, she has no income, is severely depressed needs life coaching and therapy, but cannot listen to solid advice to move forward in life and is living in monetary handouts from family to pay her monthly expensess.
Can your sister be put in a care home?
Oh yeah, I used to have a co-worker who was 40 and she was still with her parents, and was working very part time. I'm sure they paid for her car and insurances and everything else cause her pay could TOTALLY not pay for much at all.
When I was fresh out of high school I got a job right away and my parents charged me rent to live with them. They where teaching me responsibility. And then eventually I was able to get my own place and pay rent on my own and then I became a homeowner.
Ive never had more than 1000 in debt and been out of debt for years. This is so easy. Pay your bills then pretend that you make 7.25 and live off of the least that you can evvverrryytime. Not sometimes everyttimmeeeeee. I only like dave Ramsey because he encourages me to do what I've done before i ever heard of him.
The barrio culture is much like this, my parents detested it. Grown 50 year people still depending on their Mom or abuelita (grandma) to balance their accounts and pay the bills for them. It happens a lot.
Why do you care that much?... as long as your happy with the situation you are in that’s what matters most.... if they are happy with what they are doing then good for them...... control what you can control
Yes.. he's jealous
they are comfortable. I know friends who been living with parents since college 10 years... and when I talk to them about roommates, moving, taking different jobs they basicallly say everything is too expensive...and then go on vacations and trips. military could have helped both those two with just 4 years.. what happens if she dies.
What happens if Mom dies is that these two are going to find themselves utterly without the emotional or physical resources to support themselves, and trying to find a job when you're in your 30s and haven't worked is next to impossible. These two will have to try to get on some sort of disability and prove that they are too emotionally fragile to work. Or they can try to find another relative to take over their support besides their brother who isn't going to you can bet. I have extended family with a similar situation that I worry about night and day.
the sister will find a sucker to marry her. the brother will be forced to get a steady job.
modap3000
Such insight. You have it right on the dime.
Ericka Williams this is my younger sister all the way.
Lee Leonard if she’s pretty she can find a man if she really needs to. That was the plan of several of my high school classmates - get married, never work a day.
The only thing that really makes people leave the nest is moving out with a significant other.
No, plenty of people get a job and live on their own.
lovethemflowers this is true yes. But what if this job you are speaking of doesn't pay enough to live on? What happens then? And the point I'm trying to make is 2 incomes are better than one.
Gee Cee That would be just as bad, because chances are, they will carry over that same behavior ( lying around the house, not helping with cooking and cleaning, etc.) over to their significant other's place.
Gee Cee I'm 24 and just moved out. Would love to find a wife but I don't need one to financially support myself.
If only I could send this to my wife ... "29, living at home with a next level mario skillset " son
Hysterical. Share the video with her and have her read the comments. Listen if your son gets a job and is chipping in or saving towards his own place then that’s different
Reminds me of my situation.
My mother was to leave us each a property. Since I was the child she was closest to and we did things for one another, while my sister has mostly been absent until my mother started showing signs of dementia - my mother has decided to give my sister a property now and I can wait until my mother (and myself possibly are dead). I will qualify it by saying that my mother lives in the house she was to leave me and I don’t expect for her to leave just to make things even. But, I also know that she is using the dynamic to ding me over the head for being independent, opinionated, and not obedient.
This is a narcissistic relationship and there’s a BEVY about that on YT.
Of course, as I am the child with the most skill, she is trying to hoover me and keep me in the family in case she or my sister need anything.
I’ve got to this point because, what I’m trying to say is that the caller needs to be glad that he lives in another state and he may be best breaking all contact with his family. Why? Because he has to look forward to the possible dynamic that I also see myself in and looking ahead to. That you may be both hated and depended upon. That you may be devalued, while being dictated to and controlled so you can “become of use” to them, while you get no credit for it. That they can, at the same time, feel jealous of you and arrogant about what they’ve been able to get away with.
When your mother passes and they have nothing in life but what she left them (she may leave you nothing because you’re smarty pants), your siblings may, without hesitation, look to you for experience in managing their lives, finances and even sheltering and feeding them. As far as they may be concerned, you’re all in this together - once SHTF.
By the way, while I may not have the facts right, unless my sister is able to afford to live in that house on her 2-4 jobs or if my mother pumps in money, I expect that there will be a tax sale in less than a year. My sister knows nothing about home ownership, maintenance and costs. I’d asked my mother several times, before this turn of events, to tell my sister about the property taxes. She didn’t want to. Go figure.
"Powdered Butt Syndrome"!!! That's a good one!!! Thanks Dave!!!
I get why this guy has some resentment even though he is better off. I have lived out of home since 18 and I see some other people who never have to worry if the landlord will ask you to move out because housing is stable and rarely get stressed about financial stability/income (I dont have debt but you don't need to to worry) and I can see why them having it easy (if somewhat toxic) is annoying.
My sister does the same to my parents is in one of there rentals has a family paying 400 rent which normally would be 1400. Completely taking advantage of them it’s so annoying especially since she is older and has never been out in the real world I don’t know what they would do if they ever got cut off
Rotf, Ramsey said Mario at another level!
Dave always has such great advice, however, I think in this instance he misunderstood what the caller was looking for. The caller already knew how dysfunctional the situation was and that he couldn't do anything about it, I think he was more wondering how he could personally move on or let go of his resentment towards his family members. But I think Dave was so quick to jump on the bashing bandwagon that he never really heard that that's what the caller was seeking.
I think the caller needed someone else [an outsider] to validate the fact that what was going on with his siblings was insane. I have an extended family member who is in her mid 20s and never held a job, failed the certification for her degree program and quit the only job she's had after 4 hours. Her future is bleak, and it troubles me thinking of what's going to happen to her in the years to come. Currently she and her chronically ill mother are being supported by the elderly grandmother, but what they'll do when she can no longer afford it is something I worry about probably more than they do.
My impression: he heard the caller's resentment and jealousy and moved to stomp it hard. Dave wanted to remind him that's nothing to envy, even if your 8 year old self pokes his whiny head up.
We all have tht one person in the family like tht lol
He is just as messed up. He is jealous of his sister and brother still living at home. Twice he said he resents them.
That's exactly right.. he's jealous.. can hear it in his voice..
@@jaredgoldberg4055No he is not. They are taking advantage of their mom who is working herself to an early grave.
@@cookiegirl2cookie197yes this is the answer people can’t seem to understand! It’s heartbreaking watching aging parents being bled dry and taken advantage of
I have 2 nieces that are in their 30's that still live at home ... they've never had a full-time job. they pay alittle rent, but that's it. One of them parties at night and sleeps during the day. So sad to watch. Parents enables them so that they can never be independent. I can't say anything, as it would put a wedge between us.
This guy called just to say look how much better I am. He doesn't even want advise
Stepbrothers in real life.
Thank you. I needed this from Dave today.
No family lives in a vacuum.
Thirty-six-year-old brother and 31-year-old sister still living at home means that 18 years ago, this man's neighbors, childhood friends and his immediate family all watched his mother (no mention of his father) FAIL her firstborn son, his older brother, straight out of high school and said nothing, with the elder brother's childhood friends all moving on or whatever and leaving him be.
Thirteen years ago, this man's neighbors, childhood friends and his immediate family all watched his mother (no mention of his father) FAIL her second-born, his middle sister, straight out of high school behind the elder brother and said NOTHING, with THIS sister's childhood friends all moving on or whatever and leaving her be.
This man, the third-born, KNOWING his mother (no mention of his father) wasn't going to encourage, enable or in ANY way contribute to HIM get out on his own and away from her after high school, come 18, HAD WORKED HIS WAY OUT OF HER HOUSE on his own merit and has stayed out on his own merit.
Who does that leave to care enough to free the stuck elder siblings from his stunting codependent mother that saw but didn't care 18 years ago?
No one. All this man can do to save himself embarrassment is cut them off and leave them be.
+GetTheGrandFunkOut Embarrassment? Why care what other people think of you?
+Clayton Crider I actually LISTEN to videos before I comment.
Adam begins at :54: "It -- It kind of wears on me and it has been over the years because I've always worked since I was a teenager, and I'm 32. I have my own house, I've actually -- this is my second house that I'm in, you know, I live -- another state away. But I -- I feel a little resentment...."
The discussion that follows proves Adam is not feeling a little resentment, but a lot of EMBARRASSMENT, which is the state of being caused to feel self-conscious or ill at ease, disconcerted.
Dave qualifies this incorrectly applied emotion at 1:15: "I wouldn't feel resentment, I would feel pity!" which is sorrow or grief aroused by the misfortune of another: compassion for suffering; and is synonymous with commiseration, sympathy, condolence and empathy. EMBARRASSMENT in its truest sense is pity with no solution.
But observe, please, how Dave's lengthy empathetic response to Adam's subject then proceeds to reflect every bit of Adam's EMBARRASSMENT back to him over his stuck older brother and sister and the mother that has kept them emotionally stunted for 36 years.
Now, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to subtract the 36-year-old brother and 31-year-old sister's present-day circumstance of still living in their mother's house from their failure to have moved out on their own 18 and 13 years earlier to deduce all I have in my response. Also, could Dave in all his commiseration, sympathy, condolence and empathy offer Adam a solution to the mother that has thrown her older son and daughter's lives away on her stronger need to remain mama to minor children and the stunted siblings that have permitted her? Nope. Like I said: EMBARRASSMENT over which Dave could only offer Adam useless pity.
So, for you applying the logical workings of my mind to suggesting I speak of my own circumstance of being a 36-year-old man or a 31-year-old woman still living in my mother's house by asking me why care what other people think of me proves you too dumb first to ask if I'm a 36-year-old man or a 31-year-old woman!
Dave's face when he said "they don't work" LOLOL
HOKIES GAMING lol
I get tired of Dave calling enablers the nicest people. He’s gracious and I get that but cmon they’re weak more than kind.
At the start he sounds more mad that he doesn't get carried instead of being upset that their life is going to crash and burn.
Dave stop cutting people off while in mid sentence lol
I REALLY enjoy your show. thanks for your advise.
That situation will probably never change !!.
Reminds me of one of the funniest movies “stepbrothers”
I still like the idea of charging something but maybe you’re putting it aside for them when they do move. Because I have personally seen that if you don’t charge them anything then they’ll start to get complacent and start taking advantage of the situation.
0:46 Dave's face right there is priceless!
You have to take the 30,000 foot view on this issue. "Resentment" snowballs in these situations. The hostility, anger, bitterness, frustration, creates a wedge in this family, people avoid each other, who will care for Mom when she can't care for herself, and then after Mom dies there will be a nuclear war between the 3 siblings. All because Mom has enabled two lazy humans to take advantage of her, while the other is being responsible and accountable. While fair is not always equal, parents should be funneling equal amounts of dollars $$$ to the responsible kids making it on their own. When things are transparent with $$ and time, then you can avoid resentment and most of the harm to the family.
This is an excellent video ❤👍.. it’s awesome to get away from your parents…. Living with friends can be fun.
Why is this his business? All of these people are adults and get to choose how they want to live.
I worked with someone like that, she was 35 living with her parents bt she said it was so she could get out of debt n buy a house that she was in the process of buying
A bit rough on Mom, Dave. She messed up their lives ..... don't they have any responsibility in this matter?
Wonder where Dad is in all this ......
+Vydio That's beside the point. These kids should have left home a long time ago. Whether dad is in the picture or not doesn't change that. How can a person feel like an independent adult while still living at home? In my opinion, they can't.
That does not matter if the Dad is there. They are not kids. they need to go!!!
0:19 That jump tho he knew something was up😂😂
Was his life so bad he had to leave at 18?
I would love to see a day in their lives I went from a failure to launch to my mother being financially dependant on me so there was drama when I left
I feel I should have stockpiled cash to buy my way out of the drama that way I could be on my own but not leave my mother high and dry
Not everyone 30+ yrs old still living with parents is failing... I'm 31 living with my dad and building up 3 companies as an entrepreneur. What is wrong with that? You people that think everyone has to move out at 18 or any other age are insane. Where is that a rule? I'm getting along just fine.
Ehh its how western society is they put up this big notion that "you have to move out at 18 & be independent". Okay but do you know the situation this person is maybe people want their parents with them to take care of them Cuhz they took care of you, it's not a bad thing at all. Family is always there to help yet some people don't have a good family.. So many factors go into a certain persons life oh well what can we do lol.
I have a family friend who lived with his parents until he was 40 simply because he wasn't married & is incredibly frugal. When he moved out he bought a house for cash. He's now married & was able to retire at 55 as a multi millionaire. Not for everyone, but it sure did work for him!
maryyellen LOL thanks for sharing that mary - cool story!
one of his first questions is "do they not work?"...obviously your case is different...
So long as you contribute to maintaining the household by paying rent or taking over paying other bills, I see no problem with your situation. The issue with the caller is that his siblings did nothing and contributed nothing. Like Dave said, they were basically still acting like teens. What's going to happen to them if their mother drops dead or loses her job and they have no job skills? Chances are the siblings are either introverts, shy or something like that where they don't want to leave the nest, but the mother's enabling them to postpone getting their own life is a huge disservice to them.
Remember that there are lots of homeless living on the streets of America, I always wonder as where are their families, just a different point of view guys
Dude. You feel the way you feel because you love them and want them all to get a life! Play this call for you Mom.
In many countries of the world including my own, children and parents often live in the same household. Most of people I know either still live in the same house with their parents or have inherited an apartment if they live apart. That's why we usually build houses that have several stories and apartments in it so there is at least some kind of separation.
What happens when mom passes away?
Exactly! They better hope she outlives them!
They might be log to live off the caller. Hopefully he'll tell them to buzz off.
pjgumby so true lol
pjgumby Like something out of "Law & Order SVU". Doink, doink!
then the kids will inherited the house and money..
My son lives with me but he contributes and works I am glad he lives with me but we coexist and he’s been saving he has 130 k is a nurse so it works well for the both of us
Mario ain't my only skill set, I caught 150 Pokémon too 😂😂👍
They probably do not know they don’t work...meaning they stay there to help mom out! They’ll try and justify every way they can to act as though they contribute much more than they do!
my 61 year old uncle lives with his parents but he does have a job and hes going to inherit the house
Better or worse homeless or shelter and food why so bad
That’s just embarrassing I’m 20 and I’ve lived on my own for two years I’d be embarrassed to live in my parents house at that age !
There's nothing wrong living with your parents at 19 years old
Theres nothing wrong with living with your parents at 19 years old
Rick Joe well I guess we have different standards
@@Mrsandman98120 i mean like why did u move out at such a young age tho?
Don’t know why I’d be embarrassed. U can save a lot of money if u stay with them. What’s your income?
Real life Dale and Brennan 😂
Wonder what moms "Payoff" is ?
When their only skill set is Mario at another level 😂
This guy just needs to cut ties. You don't owe your family anything and this idea that a man like this must anchor his life because people he's related to are useless is stupid. Bluntly tell Mom that 30+ year olds without jobs and still dependent on their parents without working a plan to become independent are people you can't respect. Hence, if she is going to allow them to be of such low character, you will not be around them. You will also not help her in anyway that also helps them as they are freeloading bums.
If they both work and bring home with their mom theres no problem staying home with 3 incomes living in 1 house
@@terence.j why?
I feel his frustration with this.
Actually my mother in law asks her children to pay bills for her expenses as a treat off living with her. So she saves tons of money. They share phone, water, electricity, car insurance, property taxes, home remodeling cost, and appliances, etc.
I would treat my siblings like children
I have a very similar story I understand where this guy is coming from
The mother should be sectioned for her own good.
Yah I’ve stopped
"What's WRONG with them!"