Why I’m Not Returning to NURSING After ADDICTION
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 30 ก.ย. 2024
- SONG OF THE WEEK:
Garden Song - Phoebe Bridgers
VIDEO MUSIC CREDITS:
Raining in Kyoto - Ottom
Patterns - Michael Drake
(All from artist.io
Social Creator License Number - wsCdhI)
People make whole career changes at 45 (after 20 years in a field) without the circumstances you have. It’s never too late to connect with yourself and true intention. There’s nothing that feels better than being authentic.
I love what you have said here ❤️🙏
Amen!❤❤❤❤❤😊
Are you involved in AA/NA?❤
@@TejanaDama are you asking me? If so, no. But I am a licensed mental health therapist.
I’m a law student and there’s a 63 year old in my class! People really do make changes all the time and it’s never too late.
As a nurse who has been in successful recovery for decades, I want to make sure you know that you still have viable choices if you want to resume your career. I went back into nursing after taking a couple of years off, and it was fine. I stayed away from ICU and floor nursing though. Instead, I worked in areas where narcotics are basically never used. Being an infusion nurse, working mostly with chemotherapy and blood products, is a great place for nurses in recovery. There are other good areas as well. No matter what you decide to do, I wish you well.
I feel like the specialty you chose to get into after your time off can be a very humbling experience for people in general, regardless of addiction status (if any). It's a great reminder about how delicate life is yet how advanced we've progressed in terms of medicine and treatment. I wonder if just witnessing this can be a help for me and the addiction I'm stuck in
I have to say, even though you’re not working as an RN, you are 100% still a nurse. The education, critical thinking skills, and mindset change gained by your nursing experience never go away. Most importantly, you are still contributing into some of the most vital roles of a nurse as an advocate, educator, and change agent. Literally evidence based right there 😂. This channel, your storytelling, and community making is a form of nursing in my opinion
1000000000% THIS!
Thanks, Brian. I want to drop a comment about how your video series is helping me maybe in a not-so-common way.
I'm currently going through a break-up with my addicted ex-boyfriend. After a lot of cheating, lying, grifting, promises to get better, to look for more treatment, etc, I decided the pain to be alongside an addicted partner was just too much and my mental health and well being were being compromised.
I have a lot of unanswered questions, as it's normal when breaking up. However, I still find myself questioning what caused a man who claimed to love me (and when drugs were not being used by him, did make me feel love), could still hurt me in so many ways, and in such depth that it still hurts a lot today. I know the answer is "addiction", but my brain was not processing that and the only answer. Your videos have really helped me get a glimpse of what goes on in the mind of a person with active addiction, and it's helping me heal, as I'm in a way getting answers in the form of understanding.. in the shape of empathy.. While I still hold him accountable for all the damage I allowed him to do (because I did decide for a while to stick up and be there for him despite how much every relapse hurt), it now helps me separate between the man who loved me vs the man with addiction, it helps me see empathy in a whole new different light and, finally, i'm able to move on and heal.
Sorry for making this about myself, but I wanted to express my gratitude and admiration for your courage. Thanks for sharing this, It helps people in so many ways.
Lots of luck and I'll be following your updates and cheering. Lots of admiration from Mexico
Jose.
My old man never gave up. Reason I am alive today, to care for him, as we enter many years of heart failure....20+ incredible, huh? 38 years with him, and counting.
I was an ICU nurse with a BSN degree. I didn’t return to nursing after addiction. I just didn’t feel like it was for me. I could get them back too but I choose not to. It wasn’t my path. I am cheering for you! ❤
Brian I went back to school when I was in my 40's to become a social worker so I could work as a therapist in the addiction world. It is the best decision I ever made not only does it fill my soul by helping others, as an addict it keeps me sober and forces me to constantly work on myself, it's a win, win! BTW the saying "when you find your calling you'll never work another day"is so true even the worst days are worth it now! Best of luck to you man! Love your channel and your stories--you inspire me!
There's my friend Brian! Killin it at delivering wisdom from life experience, giving grace and encouragement to the still struggling, and❤❤ cleaning up his life to show others how to have a better one.
Hugs, hugs, hugs, hugs, and more hugs!!! Hope you felt all of those. ❤❤
Nursing is stressful, definitely not something you need now. Also imo you don't want to share space with narcotics.
Agree completely. Last thing any addict needs is temptation and easy access.
I could see you being a PMHNP helping people with addictions.
I’m currently in the process of getting my real estate license I’ve been in nursing for a few years. It’s very depressing one and two it’s physically hard on my body. I still have student loans I’m paying on and people think I’m nuts. But I’m doing it.
Everyone is on different paths! I've been in the esthetic industry for years and I'm planning on enrolling into a sonography program (I was also a dental assistant). It's crazy, whereas some people are doing the opposite! Leaving healthcare and going into beauty.
Just remember you need one years salary put away for real estate. You have to find your clients, it's not as easy a brokers make it sound.
Look into it thoroughly.
People get 2nd chances.
Psychiatric would be great for you especially the youth with troubles. You are far more educated than people who treat the youth.
No one is perfect, your hard on yourself.
I truly appreciate these videos, I grew up with an alcoholic and drug addict father. I was always a daddy’s girl so I used to be confused but as as I got older and understood I became mad/disappointed. I was never mad at him but at the addiction. Your videos have been healing to me and hearing more about your personal experience as my dad never talks abt his and has always tried to hide it. He is coming up on 3 years sober and I am so proud of him.
Is there a particular video that explains how drugs entered your orbit and ultimately took over? I've kind of been watching out of order and haven't seen this subject.
I have kind of touched on it here and there but I don’t think there is a dedicated video on it. I am definitely going to make one now that you mentioned it! Thank you. I think this will be next weeks topic 🙏🙂
@@SmilesforMiles2024 Thanks! Drugs have always fascinated me...... the sheer power of them. I was surrounded by them early into my teens, and experience the blessing of not having that "addiction gene", so I suppose I don't know what it's like to be addicted to anything. Not like I didn't try...... I've sampled them all at some point. Some of them I sampled more than once. Way more than once...... but eventually they got in the way of a clear reality. I wish you all the success you can grab!
I’m currently in the process of losing my nursing license. It is causing an existential crises. I thought this would be my life and it is my identity. Now I’ve lost everything and I’m very scared about the future. I honestly never thought this could ever happen. Im still in shock.
What happened?
I hope this painful time marks the beginning of a better life, for you. The videos here stand as solid truth that from the most painful lost times, hope for better remains.
I surrendered my license in 2013. It was my identity . It’s been a long time and I can get it back but the process of it is overwhelming. You will be ok. My heart goes out to you ❤
Co dependency and people pleasing was what was identified my issue when I entered rehab! I didnt even know of such a thing! So did alot of work around it! They thats were the change happened and now i understand it I dont fall back into it! I thought hard and long about not going back into my nursing, however no one knew anything and so i could just find another job! My old job was so supportive and gave me a great reference and I was so high up at that point it was so hard to go back down! So I continued! Thank you so much for sharing and yes you have to do what is best for you and you can do so much now! TH-cam and start a patron you will be fine!! 🎉
Hi Brian - My name is Chris - we may be decades apart in age - However in life experience we have travelled eerily similar paths. I wanted to take a moment to THANK YOU for being so incredibly honest and vulnerable in your videos. I I live in Australia and worked as a paramedic and also a nurse. One thing I tend to leave out of my professional Resume, is that period of my career when i was also a full time Heroin addict ..... talk about multi-tasking.
Anyways thanks again, I really enjoy your channel and look forward to your uploads EVERYTIME. I've been here for a while and don't plan on 'changing the channel' any time soon ...... so I figured I should at least drop by the comments section to introduce myself and say hello and to say a very big Thank You 🙂
Nursing sucks, if you are not truly passionate about it don't do it, it's not worth the stress! Thank you for your transparency, I hope it all works out for you. I am currently trying desperately to get out of nursing, before the stress and misery kills me.
I was going to nursing school. And because of circumstances I didn’t finish even though I’m was close to the end. ( my husband and daughter were killed in a car crash) but over the years? A lot of the people I went t to school with got out of it. Said it became too stressful. More paperwork than caring for people. Overworked and not appreciated. The one lady is actually working at McDonald’s part time and says she’s so much happier. I don’t think nursing is what it used to be. Especially after the pandemic hit.
I am so sorry your husband and daughter were taken from you.
The people in our lives we love most dearly can be gone in an instant as you know far too well. There is no shield against that kind of loss.
I hope you have loved ones to ease your grief. It is such a blessing to love and be loved, yet we can't place a shield around those we care for. You have my deepest sympathy.
About career choices:
Nursing is extremely intense. There are unique aspects to those drawn to the work that can be deeply toxic. No career is a Toxic People Free workplace of course, although we all deserve that. Compassion calls for government disallowing employers from intentional infliction of *emotional* pain in workers - I hope that becomes law. We would see more nurses, I believe, if so.
For those who sense that nursing is right for them, AND who know that dealing with difficulties not directly part of patient care exists, it can be a uniquely beautiful experience. Helping others heal is rewarding beyond all words, for those born to it.
@@rebeccabamford5505 So sorry to hear of your loss. Words aren't enough. My heart goes out to you. ❤️
I can understand how getting your license back to nurse could compromise your sobriety. Especially since you would have access to opiates and other things that would enable you. I imagine you were a very compassionate nurse. You seem to have a great heart and you can still help people and you still have purpose in life without nursing...you are absolutely killing it with your sobriety!! Keep up the Amazing work!!!
i hope your PO is a subscriber so he/she can see how you wanted to steer your life for the better. although i am not sure if that would be beneficial to you for your September big day but we are here to support you whatever happens
I know this sounds bad but I became a nurse so that I could work in aesthetics or surgery. I have yet to work in that field and I’m so miserable. I’m in a job in long term care and I’m so tired of being belittled by family members and made to feel small. It’s honestly very depressing! I just wanted a job where I made people feel beautiful and it seems it’s never going to happen.
I can so relate to this. I became an NP and struggling to get into a similar specialty.
Get into that field if u want 2. The best part of nursing is the ability to change the areas you work in.
@@terrideleon6350 it’s tough when what you want isn’t that easy to get into because they’re either not hiring or they want years of experience. I’ve tried for years now.
Keep trying, keep looking. You can do it !
Go to respiratory school.
Working as a “traveler” sounds actually pretty cool if you ask me. Bless and keep being strong! B with an I not a Y with our share of name I think you’ll probably get it.😜
Hey, I had a few questions for you. You have responded so thoughtfully to other questions on here before. I don’t follow you but this is the third video that’s come up in my timeline, so I apologize if you’ve covered this before. Also this isn’t to roast you or be mean, apologies in advance if it seems like that. But can you elaborate on what made the relationship codependent? As a nurse, you know that word is applied to several contexts and I wonder which kind of scenario (putting another’s needs before your own, the enabler/taker dynamic, being overly reliant on each other, etc) best suits you?
I ask bc in a previous video you mentioned how you really let your wife down in many ways several times. You seem to have really leaned on your wife for support, but were unable to give it back when her dad was dying and everything in her life was aflame(not saying it should be tick for tack in a union, just trying to understand your full picture better). These actions, were they the symptom of a codependent relationship or even a codependent personality. Maybe the ramifications of drug abuse, which can tarnish and warp the dynamics of any relationship (as you mention you me burgeoning addiction to kratom). I ask bc I wonder how youre thinking about future relationships, or even the one with your ex….how do you visualize your role moving forward and would you be more immune to codependency, or would overlooked features of an addictive personality spur your life if you don’t take them time to reign them in properly?
Great question. Would love a response to that!
Do a video on Kratom a ton of people struggle with it. It’ll be a super popular video
You should get into tech
Im in IT at adt security
You are such an articulate speaker and have such a good story to tell. I believe you could be a great TH-camr. You have so much knowledge on medical, nursing , addiction and there are so many subjects that you could make videos on. Most of all , I believe you are very intelligent. I've always been interested in why some people become addicted to some drugs and others don't. You got this, Brian.
Brian, you are so open about your career, your addiction, your incarceration, and that complete transparency makes it possible for me (and I am sure others) to face their own issues more directly. I do hope that your talking about your life has helped you process things since you absolutely help others. You may be choosing to not return to nursing, yet you are still helping others. Thank you!
Well Brian, I think you would make an Amazing Physical Therapist. Give it a think..
Take care and good luck in your new exciting life !!!😊
Maybe go into the building trade or some sort of trade. There will ALWAYS be people needing your services if you strive to be a good and honest tradesman.
Regards from South Africa
Have you considered becoming an addiction counselor(has you have first hand experience)
@SmilesforMiles2024 Knowing that you're currently in a non fulfilling job that takes a lot of your time and does not pay well, I think it'd make sense to get back to nursing (at least for some time) until you have some other good option, maybe even youtube + music and so on.
Wish you all the best, mate.
The thing is I think with the experiences you have gone through you could still do some good as a nurse, you have a unique perspective of going through recovery. That said, there is more than one way to do that.
There would never be 100% privacy as to your past. Plus avoid access to any scheduled drugs. Start fresh.
Australian RN here-mate you're always going to be a nurse even if you no longer practise it. you should be proud of all the people you helped over the years before you got unwell. keep your chin up
Have you thought of maybe helping others that are in addiction? You seem like you would be good at it.
In my humble opinion, you should never be a nurse or any career where you are around drugs-......go into business for yourself. It will keep you busy--
At least you have a BSN. You've a four year degree which opens other doors. I think listening to your gut, your instincts is such a positive move.
I’m curious what you are doing for work now or what you plan on in the future
Do you have a video about just the logistics of house arrest? Like do you get permission to go to the grocery store? Love to see your spirit shine through even in these circumstances
It's really cool to see how we've all switched paths, whether it was legally forced on us or not lol.
But really it's so cool watching everyone grow. I look at you and Conrad and Nate and fellow artist friends of mine who really stick with it and it's good to see. This is only a small speed bump in the road that is your musical and artistic journey my friend
I caregive. For my man. I get paid to clean my house. Not what you made in nursing, but decent. We need more male caregivers!!! To care for men we cannot move!!
These were my questions too. Thanks you, Bubbles for asking.
So you are allowed to leave after 10:30am?
How long are you allowed out?
What does it feel like?
Hope you doing good, these videos help alot of people
Hi Brian, enjoyed this video talking about what led you up to becoming a nurse and your thought process of not wanting to return.
It is interesting to think what could have happened if your partner didn't share her thought about wanting to start Nursing School. It must have been a shock to you and a big change in direction for both of your lives, since you were planning this 5 month hiking trail expedition.
I think it says a lot about you both in that you supported each other to go through the rigorous BSN program and then passing your State Boards to become RN's. They say in nursing that having a good Bedside Manner is so important. Your easy and warm smile would be a great asset to make patients feel more relaxed in what could be a tense situation.
When you were answering whether you keep in contact with your fellow Nurse Associates it brought the thought to my mind of how many other RN's are part of your channel and show so much support and rooting you on in your recovery journey.
Thanks much Brian for your very successful First Livestream. Looking forward to our Zoom call in the near future.
@5:42 That's you on the label of the sauce. I have to try it now.
Thank you for sharing your story, I’m always so amazed that you are so honest and frank about addiction. You are helping a lot of people!
Your mentality and growth is incredible to hear about. Thank you so much for sharing your journey. I hope that everyone struggling with addiction can heal!
Think you could add “The Kill” by 30 Seconds to Mars to your song list?!? 😉🎤🎸🌹
Take your time and really dig deep to find your calling as you journey out of a life of addiction. You seem like a great guy who hit rock bottom and are now doing the hard work of climbing your way back to the awesome man you can become. I'm rooting for you!
You can come back as a certified csse manager
Awesome content bro 👍
Thank you so much. I really appreciate that 🙏
Love you all the way from Portugal ❤
I quit medical field never been happier never an adict but mother was
What area do you work in now Amy? I am desperately trying to escape nursing and am looking for ideas!
Using Kratom is what made me throw 16 years of being clean from heroin down the drain.
I’m glad you’re doing well these days. I am clean now since 2/4/24. Keep it up man!
Congratulations on getting clean !
I'd bet that Kratom will be as a minimum scheduled, before long.
Yeah F Kratom, that shit had me for a ride for awhile. Off of it now, thank God
@@srauenonline thank you so much! And yeah, as far as Kratom is concerned I’d be willing to bet you’re right.
@@alexandereisen3486 yeah kratom is such bad news for sure. I’m so glad to hear you’re off of it now too. I get scared and sad when I see people misled into believing that kratom is safe and harmless. 😢
I’m living proof it is not.
Nurses are the single largest healthcare profession. Healthcare is one of the largest industries in the US. There are so many areas where a nurse may work beyond direct patient care or working in a hospital. As a retired RN, I only did bedside care using my RN license for 5 out of 40 years. I’ve worked for healthcare consulting firms, advertising agencies, not-for-profits, top tier pharmaceutical companies, biotech firms, biomedical research organizations, healthcare start-ups, marketing and business strategy agencies, market research companies…Many roles, different companies, but ALL using my healthcare expertise and with my unique and VALUABLE knowledge as a nurse, but never needing an RN license. Good luck! You’ll be fine. ❤
Hey bubba can you do a video on kratom please
HI BRIAN!! IM CURRENTLY CLEAN AND PRETTY MUCH JUST WANT TO LET YOU KNOW HOW AMAZING IS THE FEELING I GET JUST TO KNOW THAT IM NOT A PIECE OF GARBAGE WHICH SOCIETY MAKES YOU FEEL! EVEN NURSES AT THE HOSPITALS TREAT YOU DIFFERENT also!!!! 😅😅😅 Anyways how come you don't talk about your parents siblings or you don't want to, cuz if you were my son my brother.... I fkn be so proud of you so far! 😂😂😅😅🎉 ❤ Love you back bri!!!! Thanx for sharing!!!! ........................
PLEASE PLEASE READ AAAALLLLL OF YOU COMENTS OF AAAALLLL OF YOUR VIDEOS!! 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 🙏🏼 😂😂😂😂🎉❤
You done spiraled from 🌀 from hell and back and think you don’t have nothing to do with it? Why don’t you help people who been through the same! 😊 God needs people like you man 🧍🏾♂️
He’s hot.
As a fellow nurse who has her BSN, I am shocked you got your BSN just because your partner did. I'm glad you're getting away from nursing and finally doing something you're passionate about.
Teacher here, I taught elementary school for close to 10 years.
I happened to be in a serious car accident (which wasn’t my fault), and was put on opiates. By the 4th year of my opiate journey, I was 100% physically and emotionally addicted to the pain relief. I had a very similar story, and now I don’t want to go back to my profession (teaching) either. I really don’t know what I want to do with my life anymore, but your video has helped me to not feel so alone.
Of course my parents, family, and friends all expect that after all of my education, I would go back to teaching (an “honorable” profession). It’s a hard situation, because I really didn’t enjoy what I was doing. I loved the kids, but administration was getting absolutely crazy. So much stress, ALL OF THE TIME.
All of this to say, I’m a little bit lost now.
Oh also, Phoebe Bridgers is one of my favorite artists. Take a listen to the song “So Much Wine,” if you get a chance.
Sending so much love and good vibes to you always…..♥️♥️♥️
Thank you for your channel, it helps to not feel so alone in my experience.
Great channel. Much love from a fellow recovered addict / pct hiker heading into nursing- Flamingo PCT '21
Ahhhhh Billie! ☺️ Looking forward to hearing what you are enjoying on her new album! 🤗
I’ve only listened to it once… but so far I’m digging it! Gonna have to listen to it multiple times all the way through. (Think I’ll do that tonight, thanks for reminding me ha!) She said in an interview that she’s “never loved anything more” than this album….
I would want you as a nurse. You are obviously compassionate but I can certainly understand why you would not want to return. You were following her, not yourself.
It sure would be nice to have it under your belt. I dated an ER Doctor, and he had a co-worker who got caught doing opiates at work.. He said once you get popped, they have these predatory, expensive hospital programs that have to sign off on it. They understand you need to get your creds back, so they make it up to them if you're better.
Keep these videos coming. I can see you growth and strength with each
This is true.
You can work in urgent care, health department, case mgr nurse, dialysis clinic, or infusion nurse like another commenter wrote. Lots of options.
My son was in the NICU for nearly two months after he was born, which was obviously a difficult time for my wife and I. It’s hard for me to describe how grateful I am for the nurses who took care of him. Absolute heroes, all of them.
I think it would be helpful to show how someone can go into nursing after such a fall. That said, is You Tube going to be your goal now?
You may not want to do direct hands on patient care, but some of my nurse friends have worked their way into case management jobs that do not not have the bone crunching stress. Of course, you may need or want to completely change channels.
Wise man. I very much feel what your saying. I was a firefighter for almost 4 years before I got into about 16 years of addiction with heroin which started from having eight surgeries and using oxycontin legally for over a year and getting dependent on it. I am not quite free yet as I'm down to 8 mg of methadone a day, been on methadone for a year and been weaning myself off the whole time. It's like one of my counselors said years ago you guys are lucky you're here at a young enough age where you can do something about it and still start your life over again, most people don't have that chance. It still can be daunting and hard, like you I'm trying to just put in the work bit by bit.
Your worst “fears” are your “least”fears. A nursing degree is the door to another career don’t let the license go. There’s to many doors to open and you might need a part of that degree in your future.
Yooo love the content ❤man keep it up I’d love to do a collab take a look at my 8part series about being addicted to heroin and coming out it’s at the beginning of my channel content
Just working a night shift watching your video lol. Totally appreciate that you don’t feel the pull to go back to nursing. Especially when it wasn’t a passion of yours to begin with. Gotta go in the direction that will keep you healthy and happy.
you would be an amazing drug counselor or something similar in helping others with addiction
Ive been sober 15 years. Your videos help more than any of the many many videos on TH-cam. That you're still facing the consequences of your habit is coming thru in your body language. Good luck. If i can do it, so can anybody. But it never hurts to have a refresher course
Your advice about authenticity etc,,,brill,,thanks from England❤
As a new subscriber I appreciate you opening yourself up the way you have.
Hope you find something that will aligned and and honor your authenticity that is the true power of overcoming addiction
Same. I knew I had opiates by the tail my whole life until addiction kicked off (and the addiction ride began).
Once you’ve collected your thoughts on the new Billie album we’d love your review!
Thank You for realizing and respecting that!
Nothing wrong with changing anything. I am glad your head is in a good space now and the worst off the fallout is coming to and end. I know of a doctor and one of his former P.A.s became involved with opiates and ended up with licensing problems. They ended up working in addiction medicine. That could be an idea if you change your mind. There is not much of a stigma for professionals like this. Most are in recovery.
Thanks for being so open. Keep looking for what’s true for you.
❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
TPAPN saved my career twice. Strike 3 and I’m out
The nursing board… yeah.. no.. CDL maybe
Would you try and get your license back and let us watch the process?
Much respect
Talk about the damage done to your patients please. I know it’s the most painful part, but you put tens of not hundreds of patients through a rough time from pain, etc.
Diversion is the easiest way for RN’s to get narcotics and it is always a component of their addiction. Please share.
Power to you bro.
Diversion might have been an easy thing before. There are layers on layers of safeguards now. Like robbing a bank, I can see how it could happen once. Not really seeing it as much of an ongoing process today.
Take good care!☮️
Plz don't put a bad light on kratom it is not an addictive drug you can never overdose on it alone it makes u dizzy when u take too much and it does not make you high it can help tamper form opiate withdrawal however it's a plant in coffee family from southeast Asia, I can't see how kratom would ever be an introduction to opiates kinda strange
You need to read up on kratom.
Opioid addicts have an 80% relapse rate.
Bad idea to put yourself in a situation where you have access.
Not necessarily disagreeing... That said, alcohol has a real high relapse rate, and thats in most markets. Staying away from slippery places kind of always makes sense whenever possible.
Do you feel that there is too many triggers in nursing?
If I could get out of nursing I would!!!
You can get groceries on house arrest?
Change. Trust. Purpose.
As an addict, I couldn't work as a nurse. Too tempting....
You can get your certification of case management
Thanks for this video!
Less talking, more skin.
Pause
Say more
Who is supporting you as you find your calling? Just curious, because I would love to find something like that for me!
What about the harm to patients that occurred while you was under the influence of drugs. Did you divert drugs from patients who needed them? Like most addicts it’s all about “me” and excuses, never apologies about the harm caused.