My Grandmother Gifted Me $9,000 and Now She Wants it Back!
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 11 ส.ค. 2020
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$9000 and a year later it’s $12,000?? Either grandma is a payday lender or is in the mob.
🤣🤣🤣 I wondered the same thing🤭
30% Jesus Grandma needs that side money from her shark behaviour “It’s a gift “ one year later.... “That will be 30% please”. You: 👀 🤨
😝
Shakedown 💰
over 33% on top. Even banks don't do people dirty like that. That Grandma tripping
Grandma has a very unique and interesting investment strategy.
No, it was a setup.
Granny’s a crook
Lol
LOL!! 😂
Prince Talleyrand LOL!! You did the math! 😂
giving 9 grand and a year later asking for 12 grand is charging a 30% interest rate. Granny's a loan shark
33.33%
😂i was about to say that 😂
30%. Granny compounds interest monthly.
Lol, exactly what I was thinking!
What a thief GM. She gave you $9k to be under the Bank/IRS reporting form as a transaction. She's a Loan shark. Tell her you'll report this gift & her demand $12k Letter to the Courts & IRS. Goodbye GM👍😉
The IRS would love to hear that a gift she signed for is no longer a gift. Never trust a narcissist, especially one that's been diagnosed
Asking for the money back is bad enough but she's also charging interest 😂??? This grandma is deluded
She acting like she's a bank giving out loans
yeah and ~30% interest in year.. wow. Banks give you ~2-3% these days?
webfreakz it’s actually like 1-2%
@@guillermogutierrez-santana4446 here in The Netherlands I get 0.05% interest rate lol
@@webfreakz What are Dutch Stock returns like?
Don't pay her , she's lying now. The relationship is already gone.
Exactly this💯
To your point, paying her won’t resolve the situation. This relationship is damaged already.
Ok experts
Right💯
@@DagnirRenthey're absolutely right if we have all the important details.
My grandma never gave me a dime, but she always cooked me the best lasagna and meatballs and played cards with me. She died when I was 8, and I miss her.
You had the best kind of nanna
@@FabulousCucumber-ip9hu She also fed the neighborhood street kids. Kids with absent parents would always be at her house and she would always be feeding everyone and giving them a place to spend their day.
@@_GandalfTheGrey_that’s wholesome :) she sounds like a sweetheart.
@@user-sf9gs2pg1b She was. And she had the mouth of a sailor too! She used to say “Get over here, you little shit, so i can kiss you!”
@@_GandalfTheGrey_ That demonstration of love is priceless!
NEVER ever offer to repay anything you receive as a gift. Not even casually. Accept it as a gift, and say thank you.
"She's done things like this before to my parents..." - RED ALERT! RED ALERT! SHIELDS UP!
Thank you for the Star Trek reference hear. Made me laugh... Shields up.... Evasive maneuvers!!
Geordi, can you increase shield strength?!
-I can tie the warp engine directly to the shields!
DO IT NOW!!!
The $9k was looking to good to refuse. Even in knowing her "pattern".
@@Bobby.Kristensen MAKE IT SO!
@@MsLacy707 I'd be happy to take it and tell her to pound sand.
She should have drawn up terms from the start if she wanted it back.
You can't lose a relationship you never had.
BINGO.
Mom & Dad gave us $10,000 for a house down payment. Dad died, mom wanted it back. I said it was a gift & did not give it to her. She cried around to her mother, that gave her $10,000. Then her mother (yes, grandma) called me up and said I owed her $10,000. I didn't pay either of them ...ever. They both told everyone in the family I stole from them. Most of my cousins laughed & remarked about their experiences with them. I was left out of the will. By both. I did not and still do not care.
money and family doesn't mix they always feel entitled 💯
Do not blame you one bit. If My kids ever ask for some money I will give it if I have it to spare but would never ask for it back. But I also for-warned them that I will not pay their bills. I will always have a roof and food for you but your bills and debt is on you. Figure it out, I did
@Donna McCall money doesn't split families up. It just breaks the camel's back
Haha funny my dad did the same thing to me with money but I was like 13 or 15 and got mad when I spent it. Love that I spent he couldn't get to me like he did to my brothers.
Terrible.
Grandma needs to be told: "No. You said this was a gift. We treated it as a gift, not a loan."
Grandma needs her face rearranged.
"She's done this to my parents" well looks like you already knew this could be an issue.
Yep. Some people think that what is happening to others will never happen to them. He even said he thought he and his wife would be the exception.
Real talk, when I heard that I said to myself “why did you think you were so special?”
Exactly. He saw 9K and couldn't say no.
@@dr.dermixgirlmd7479 because when we are young, we are stupid....look in the mirror and honestly say, what would have 23 year old me have done.
@@dr.dermixgirlmd7479 turned out I wasn't so special after all. You're right 😂
Grandma scamming her own grandchildren.🤦🏿♂️
Folks, if you're interacting with a diagnosed narcissist, please understand that you are nothing more than an object to them. You're simply a resource that they can use or ignore depending on what suits them. Never give them anything and never take anything offered from them because there is absolutely an ulterior motive.
Wiser words have never been spoken! They ruin families.
❤😂❤❤❤❤
Dam you just described my mother
"How Old is the Grandma?" - "64" - Thinking in head " She will be around a while" hahahah
Lol!!!! 😂😂😂😂😂😂
Unless she “accidentally” falls off the stairs 👁👁
yeah, that's what crossed my mind too
exactly! the b can easily live another 20+ years.
Same thoughts when I heard the age, lol, we're bad 🤣
My grandma gave us $5000 when we were planning on buying our first home. We were to get it when she passed, but she asked if we would like it early for our home. She was so proud that we used it towards our home, and two homes later, its still working. See you again someday, Grandma!!
No everyone is sick like the grandma in this video. Your grandma was obviously a generous, loving soul.
Losers yes you are
Your grandmother was an amazing woman like my grandmothers. God rest all there souls!
What a beautiful grandmother u had. So caring and making sure her grandchild was taken care of
@chrisc1896 My mom has money saved for our kids and the other grandkids, too.
This is why I don't take large gifts from family members. My wife's grandparents tried to offer us $$$ for our down payment for a house. I said NO THANKS!!! I don't want them to hold it over our heads..
Good move. A "gift" is not a gift if it comes wth strings, such as, telling you how to live your life, etc.
Exactly! 👌🏾
Yup, it'd be "Oh you're going on ANOTHER vacation? I guess you didn't really need our help making the down payment after all!"
Great move! They'd also claim the house is partly theirs because if it wasn't for them giving you the down payment, you wouldn't have the house. Not worth the headaches
TheCobruhAlienat0r YUP!!! Or “hey i need a favor from you, remember when I gave you 10k as a down payment?”
"thought we were the exception" this line of thinking has to be the top reason people get wrecked in life.
“I didn’t think the tiger would attack me.”
"Sorry Grandma; it was a gift. Go kick dirt." Whatever she does after that, deal with it.
she didn't wanna round up the money to $10,000 so she wouldn't have to report it... shame on grandma.
Carter, I didnt know you watch Dave Ramsey 👀
Prxhcision I roam these TH-cam streets
You're confusing IRS limits. In 2020, you can gift up to 15K to family members without involving the IRS.
I didn't know you watched these. I thought you just made mad memes for Agent 00 😂😂😂
That seems like a legitimate reason to me. I wouldn't want to report it either.
Dave: what’s your household income?
Tyler: $80k
Dave: you need to sell your grandma
😂😂😂
@Big Bubba how about giving her away for free?🤣😂
😂
No one wants to pay the interest on that grandma
Lol
This is exactly why I can't ask for anything from my parents or anyone in my family. EVERYTHING comes with strings. I can't let them cook me a meal, buy me a present, do literally anything, because they will hold is over me for YEARS. It's horrible. I look forward to breaking that cycle of toxicity with my children.
Terrible situation. I feel for you.
🙏
My daughter is 30. She called me and asked for
$3000. She said she would pay me back.
I said no. You can have it. You don’t owe me nothing. No strings attached. That was 3yrs ago.
It 8s so nice to be able to help family out without strings.
@@sweetpea4967 very true
My dad gave us $4000 to help buy our first home 36 years ago. My sister took him for everything he had before we could think about paying him back. SOO glad for his gift and that she didn't get her meathooks on it. We are now in our late 50's and finally own in full our beautiful home. Thank you Dad forever!!
What then happened to your dad if did took everything?
DO NOT pay grandma back. Go with Ramsey’s option of writing her a letter and telling her why. It was clearly a gift. If you used a “gift letter” for your mortgage financing, you could be in trouble with your lender by agreeing to pay it back. Debt/income ratio for loan calculations would be off and that could be considered fraud on your part. It’s about time someone told Grandma to grow up. If it’s you 🤷♀️ that’s life. Good luck!
You are going too extreme. They should not pay it back because it wasn't a gift. The mortgage company wouldn't find out, most likely.
Sounds like grandma could be in trouble for fraud. The fact that she lied by saying this is a gift and now wants her grandson to pay it back plus a 25% interest shows that she is noting but a scam artist.
2020 She basically gave them a You Owe I note for $3k a year from then.
Great point
Thank you so much igonna put it to my tsfa savings acount
Don't pay her, don't be stupid.
Right!
It’s family tho
EnderGamingTV , family acting like a loan shark. No thank you. She gets nothing.
Just pay her and be done with it. Keep her at a far distance. Or else she might show up at your house or do other things that is not worth worrying about. It is only money. The lesson is bigger than $9k
@@endergamingtv6135 No she is NOT. Family does not treat you that way. Blood relation has little to do with family. Family is about relationship.
This made me appreciate my loving grandmother even more. God bless you Tyler.
Same
Kelly blink three times if your grandma is holding you hostage and need help.
I look forward to the day I will be a parent and grandparent so I can actually bless my children and grand children, ending my family cycle of poverty.
Same.
That is beautiful. I have found that people who tend to stay in the cycle of poverty do not have the expectation of wealth. I always assumed that through my perserverance and hard work I would become financially well off. You will achieve it don't give in or give up!
Sounds like somebody's going to a low end nursing home
Lololol
No she's not!!!
More like a Walmart buggy and a sleeping bag
😄
😂😂
Look up 60 minutes, watch video of nurse beating old people while stealing their watches and jewelry, sends grandma there.
Even if it was a loan, in a year $9k becomes $12k? A 33% interest rate? Loan sharks aren't even that bad
Hard money is 15-25%, this is SUPER-HARD MONEY!!!
Yeah. 12k. I'd get her on the phone or in person just so I could have the opportunity to laugh at her.
At a Pawnshop it is 400% per year.
They always write it as a ‘per month’ figure so it looks much less.
Loan sharks charge 50% and up. A friend got a loan at 150% interest
There should be a cap on interest. My country has regulation and the legal maximum interest rate is 20% including all costs. It's a big percentage, but it stops the most outrageous offers.
My wife's parents wanted us to buy the house right next door to theirs - and said they would even help with the downpayment - but both my wife and I knew to say No. We make our own money and our own decisions.
Everybody loves Raymond 🤣
Good for the both of you!!! People are so fast to accept money that wasn’t extremely needed in the first place
Our parents are great, but I wouldn't live next to them for a million dollars.
Yup, that's TOO close to them. The absence of a mortgage payment will not be worth it. You need your privacy, and I would think they'd want theirs too.
@@CarlaQuattlebaum reread that comment...." And said they would HELP with the down payment" what part of that translates to you "no mortgage?"
Do not pay her back forget grandma she’s a mess.
Pay her back and keep her at a far distance. Not worth worrying about someone trying to get revenge on your family and try to ruin your reputation. It is only money. The lesson is bigger than money.
@@Originalman144
Never give in to the demands of someone like this. It only gives them more fuel to try it again on the next victim.
But how about the will.....?
Jeremy Peterson This is not a “someone” it is their grandma. Paying her back is not “giving in” it is called problem solving. This is a major lesson for the dude and his family. Bigger than money.
@@Originalman144
You are obviously lucky to have never dealt with a sociopath family member like this. They are not worth keeping in your life. They spread pain and suffering wherever they go and they never learn to stop. They are constantly looking for ways to exploit you and emotionally manipulate you. They'll gaslight you until you are convinced you're going crazy. They'll steal from you and try to convince your other family members to turn against you, if you don't bend to their demands.
Never try to negotiate with a narcissist. They'll always play the victim. If it was me, I'd be cutting all ties with granny and she wouldn't be getting a dime of the money back.
Nah just give her $9k back and move on. Never talk to her again.
I think he has two options: pay back the $9k or leave it. In no way do you pay interest, there is no agreement to pay interest and her demanding it is just insane. Also, her will is likely a falsehood and relying on it will only leave him at her mercy for the rest of her days. Refusing to pay her will result in her being angry, but may be the safest option actually. She would realize she has no power over him and this would likely anger her. Paying her actually seems riskier. If you pay her, legally it looks like a loan and if she wants to escalate this to court, it would work against him. Also, she can freely change the terms, as there were no agreed upon terms. I would probably not pay, tell her it was a gift and there is no paperwork for a loan or interest. And if she explodes, just stay away.
@@bwill1560 Exactly why I said cut all ties and don't pay her back. She already filed paperwork stating that it was a gift and that the money was tax exempt. It sounds to me like she found her loop hole so she didn't have to pay taxes on the money she "gifted" to them. If that's the case then she's trying to manipulate her grandson and his wife by not only asking for the gift back, but charging interest AND she already avoided paying the taxes on the money. Granny knew what she was doing.I know it may be a hard pill to swallow, but sometimes cutting a friend or family member off is the best option for everyone involved. I'd be writing her a letter back with the copy of the tax exempt form that she filled out stating it was a gift and tell her she's not getting it back. Sorry...not sorry. Send it certified mail and leave it at that. It doesn't sound like they're close anyway. If they were there's no way his grandmother would treat him like that.
Exactly, true narcissists, which Grandma def sounds like, are the worst. My spouses parent is one. We cut all contact. Shortly after they sent us a long letter and a check for $1000. Boy did I need that money then... BAD. My spouse was torn on what to do. I walked into the other room, came back with a matchbook and lit the check on fire. A narcissist ALWAYS has strings attached to EVERYTHING. Not worth it. I'd rather go hungry.
Great advice.
I am sadly from a dysfunctional family where parents dangle money in front of you--offer gifts and then take them away. You need to absent yourself from that kind of crazy. Just walk away. It's better for your mental health. I do not hold a grudge with my parents but I won't consort with them very often. They'll dangle the gifts. And I don't want to involve myself in a mind game. Yes, there are other family members who chase. If I get an inheritance, I get an inheritance. It's theirs to give. But I'm not here on earth to live in such a trifling manner.
Relatives gifting money, never goes well you always owe them for the rest of your life.
My grandfather gave me a number of gifts when I was a child. He took back every single one later, from toys to a shotgun my great-great-grandfather owned. I would no longer accept anything from him while he was alive. I got a worn-out jackknife and 23 coins from the estate when he died. Worth about 40 cents. The only thing I have from him memorable was how not to treat anyone. I have given many gifts to people so far, and I would never accept one back, ever. I love being generous.
The more you give, the better you feel, the more you'll receive. It's the law of the universe. You're a beautiful soul. You can thank your grandfather for that.
"The only thing I have from him memorable was how not to treat anyone" That lesson is more valuable than anything he EVER could have given you. You are lucky you received it and put it to good use.
Awww 😔
Wow. People like that have got to be mentally ill. Wtf.
How could he take back toys from you? That's crazy.
As someone who dated a narcissist for almost 7 years, before he even said it I yelled out "NARCISSIST GRANNY!!" 👵🏼
Gaslight granny
oops voice to text typos. I'm sure you know what I mean though
She’s NEVER going to change. Just walk away and don’t engage. Boundaries boundaries boundaries…
Excalty.
You don’t need to give her anything. Next time you see her just give her a baloon that says ‘Get well soon’ 🎈
I can't believe they would suggest paying her back. Don't pay back a gift. She gave up on the relationship when she lied.
How do you know she lied? What if he is the one who is lying? He said he offered to “pay her back the money.” So this “gift” was most likely a loan!
@@FisherCollegeMa , So we should assume every caller is lying? Tyler called in, not Grandma.
Don't know how to feel about it all. 9k is a decent sum of money for me and it'd make me feel wary. And like the other person replying here said...for a second it almost sounded like a loan that "turned" into a gift. I say that from my experience where I eventually told a family member to leave it as is since it was more of a hassle/burden for me to try to collect.
As for this situation, I think I'd return the money and end the relationship with the grandma. $9000 though and nothing more...adding the interest is just stupid.
Reina Bella what are you talking about?
@@FisherCollegeMa when my Grandma gave me $8000 to help me move to the Southeast and get a new start, I offered to pay it back. She said no. When I finally had the money and went to pay her back, she wouldn't take it. Plus the caller said she's pulled this with other family members. they were young, excited and stupid like we've all been at some point in life. And I've dealt with people like her in my own family. Plus liars usually don't have details so lined up like this caller. No, the grandmother is a scam artist.
Man, 33% interest, the big bank lobby is going to be calling her for business tips.
They owe her money too. They've been dodging her calls
😂
Tyler: My grandma has a gun to my head and is holding me hostage in her house
Dave: What's your household income?
😂🤣
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
OMG that's hilarious!
🤣
Haha
When my dad passed away he left my brother and I $10,000 each. My husband and I used ours to pay off our credit cards. Fast forward to a few months later and my mother then ask me to pay it back in installments of what I would have paid monthly on our credit card debt. I didn't pay it back and she finally stopped asking for it. It took a few years but it was a gift from my father. So, nope it's not getting paid back, period.
I wouldn't pay her a dime. However, if I DID decide to pay her, I wouldn't set up a payment plan. As soon as you set up a payment plan, especially in writing, you become legally obligated to pay.
Pay her back .. lesson learned
@@bmbott123 Lesson Learned? What's the lesson, never take gifts from family?
Dr. BoJangles I would want it in writing if buying a house or if the person is untrustworthy. This is so sad though.
If they really want to set up a payment plan: they should just say they can’t afford it and offer $10-$50 a month until they “pay it back”. She’s in her late 60s. She’s not gonna live forever right?
No payment plan. Squirrel up $9000 and gift it back. Wash your hands and walk away. As in forever.
Grandma is committing fraud. Pure & simple... And she's repeat, rinse, repeat. IMO.
"Controller".: IMO
This would be my grandmother if she could afford it. My condolences to this guy.
These shows are so educational and a safe way to experience how uncomfortable these issues are, hopefully so one can learn from and not have happen to them.
If they have the papers that shows she gave the $9,000 as a gift to avoid taxes, isn't it illegal to try and get the money back? I would also talk to a tax lawyer.
The money has already been taxed. the gift papers keep the kids from having to claim it as income and pay taxes again. Grandma should pay taxes on any interest she charges because that in income. Give her the 12,000 and then report her to the IRS. lol.
@@thomasm5922 hahahah I think that would be worth the money!!!
@@thomasm5922 hilarious
Pay her back and report her to the IRS for tax fraud.
There are no reporting requirements for a gift of less than $15k. Grandma doesn’t get any type of deduction and no one has to pay taxes on it. Yea, the interest on the “loan” would be taxable.
Sounds like grandma is an amoral scam artist. She deliberately set them up in a bait and switch to not only get a tax break but also to milk them for a score in the form of "interest". I doubt she has much of an estate that any threats of being excluded from her will are going to impact their life.
Write her a letter, thank her for her gracious gift, and respectfully decline any form of payment, and move on. She's clearly not worth being in your life.
Giving a gift doesn’t afford one a tax break. Unless there is some state tax laws that I don’t know about.
Alexis Jankowski gifting money reduces the size of taxable estate.
Good advice
Grandma is a loan shark
Thank you for the advice. I did exactly what Dave told me to do. She didn't handle it well at all... Like we thought, she threatened the will, got very upset, and hung up. My wife and I were very respectful to her, but she gave us no grace at all. It's sad that she isn't who I once thought she was. I'm happy we are moving on, and we no longer have to deal with her toxic traits.
From the second Tyler was talking I’m like grandma is a narcissist. Glad he cleared that up. Man narcissistic people are horrible. There’s no rules and boundaries with these people.
Here's the thing.. he already knew how she was based on his parents' experiences with her. He was willing to take the risk because he wanted the house. Be cautious when you sign on with evil because it always comes back and bites.
That happened to me and my husband. Family member gave us 4k to help buy our house. Two years later came back asking for the money back and was always complaining to other family members that she was broke and we did not want to help her. We worked very hard, paid that $4k and NEVER spoke to that person again.
It’s a gift. Make her go to court to get it back. She has to prove it’s a loan.
She’d lose and waste everyone’s time and money, they have paperwork proving it’s a gift and not a loan.
Judge Judy...........
That's exactly what I thought. She has to prove it is a loan, not the other way around. a loan just under 10k is very clearly a gift (that is just under the reporting level) unless she can prove he asked for that exact amount and signed a promissory note. I would never take a large gift of money without a signed letter.
@@alicelaybourne1620 Also do not say you will pay anything back by text either as it is admissible evidence. Say always thank you as a gift.
The way it works in the mortgage industry is that if someone were to gift you the a portion of the down pay or all the down payment, they would have to sign a letter that says that the money is not to be paid back to the donor. She can’t do anything about it legally.
Shakespeare ‘Neither a borrower or a lender be’
“Grandma, I spoke with my lawyer and he said no. Sorry. Take it up with him.”
How is Dave even entertaining paying this woman back more than was given?
My thoughts exactly! $3K over a year??? What kinda craziness is that?
He’s always been big on keeping the family together.
He accepts that some people want and have to keep the family together. And will do anything to keep that part alive. Which to keep ties to the family you have to meet her demands. Which is why he says that he isn't sure she will ever be happy and that it may never end. So he offered the 2 solutions. And the kid was already leaning to not paying and being morally right. He just needed some help from someone on the outside to talk through it and get it done.
If your brother sues you give him your cloak too. Something like that. Mathew 5:40.
Maybe because he's an idiot?
My sister behaves like your Grandmother,the difference is she is 12.
Your sister gave you $9000?! She sounds like a very successful 12 year old.
Word of advice. Cut ties with your sister before it's too late.
I hesitated to cut ties with my narcissistic mother and I almost died because of it. Keep a wide berth from narcissistic individuals.
@@nataliesteiner Manh it was $1200 from birthdays and Christmas gift.But in 3days I was labelled the thief😥
@@morgandawn6413 I did and the kid now gathered those who can listen and because she is young,they listened.I just gave her her money and moved out the house
😂
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He will never be rid of this if he gives in
Sounds like grandma is a few French fries short of a happy meal.
😂😂😂😂 this is funny
I wouldn't pay her, period. However, if he want's to pay her, just give her back the $9,000 and be done. If she wants to be mad, let her.
I wouldn't pay her jack lol
And then rat her out to the IRS for taking the tax credit for the gift - which wasn't a gift.
@BlackMan614 - I almost posted a comment like that! 😄
@@BlackMan614 What tax credit for gifts are you referring to?
@@joeb1522 There is a tax credit for donations
My grandmother is just like this lady. She has scammed every single member of my family. She tried to do this same strategy to me. I heard the rumors and I declined her money gifts. She hates me now and I am pretty sure I am out of the will lol! The truth is, do research on narcissistic people. You physically cannot have a relationship with someone like this. They are rotten to the core.
When you take away a narcissistic person's power, they can't cope. My grandmother was the worst, beyond anything you can imagine
Same thing happened to me with my father, gave me 2,000 and charged me 4,000, I paid and learn the hard way. You just don’t expect that from your parents
Wow
Disgraceful.
Unless the deal was to give him back 4k. You should of given back 2k and cut ties but you're cowardly.
I’d tell my dad to pound sand
B.S. I would not eel obligated to pay her back, & tell her I don't care about the will, I would try & pay her back some of it, with a respectful letter, and go on with your lives!!!!
I would tell her
1. She said out of her mouth it was a gift.
2.I don't want any part of her will
3. I don't have the money to pay it back.
And lastly, I would NEVER accept any "gift" from her ever again.
Does she even have anything to leave in a will?
@@onlyu7308 doubt it
There's no way to win with this woman. Sometimes toxic family members have to be let go.
You guys are so wise! I love listening to y'all! I'm new to the show and I am bingeing these clips lately! Very helpful and you ask great questions and have great discernment!
If you have a family member with this diagnosis DONT ACCEPT MONEY FROM THEM! Learn from this mans experience.
"She's been diagnosed as a narcissist.. AND and liar." I'm dead. XD
Then why did you take the money 🤔
Can you actually get diagnosed as that? LOL
@@Gaphalor yes
Habitual lying is part of narcissism
@@SH-vj2ce Probably wanted to give her a taste of her own medicine - or he was blinded by greed so he took a deal he knew he would lose.
Grandma is a loan shark
So sad to hear this about grandma . Dave gave you good advice !
Regardless of what the caller chooses to do, he definitely needs to go no or low contact with his dear granny. She's toxic and isn't going to change at 64, I know from experience! Best of luck to him and his wife going forward.
Never focus on a person's will. Live for yourself and your family. You'll be 10 times happier with life because you don't see money.
Funny you said that, my family members that don't do that great and are financially illiterate want to be in both of my parents wills (they divorced when I was young and they both do well) and I could care less about their wills for myself. However, I will do whatever they ask of me. My dad has asked to split it with my brother and my mom has asked for a few different things to happen (properties and investments a little different situation) and I will 100% make sure whatever they want is done. I do not care to get given anyone else's money. I'm very happy they both taught me how to make it on my own as well as live well under my means and have good character - that's more than any willed out money or assets are worth, in my humble opinion.
As far as im concerned that relationship is over. Once family begins extorting you for money im done, was nice knowing you goodbye, hope those prospective grandkids were worth $9,000.
My husband's mother did a similar stunt with my husband. We were not married at the time, had I been privy to the transaction I would've done my best to talk him out of it. When she didn't receive her money back quick enough, she sued him. There was a plan for repayment but, it was very vague. I have always said, you never want to owe money to 2 people....family and the IRS.
You never can deal with a narcissist or a liar. You will never win. Best to just move on as best you can.
Family and finances don’t mix. Gifts are never just that. They’ll use it to get something from you later on. You’re always better off declining monetary “gifts” from family.
It depends upon the family. A gift that's given from a loving standpoint is different than a manipulative trojan horse disguised as a financial gift. You have to know your family.
I think the grandmother let them BORROW $9,000 and she wants to be paid back. My sister did the same thing. I loaned her $4,000 and she did not want to pay me back. Family members like to play these stupid games! This is why I don’t lend money to family.
You don't accept gifts from your family? You guys have a weird family dynamic lol.
@apierre6 I wouldn’t accept this much money from a family member unless it was an inheritance from a Will.
Disagree - With normal sane people, including family, a designated gift is a gift - no hidden meanings. Has worked in my family.
I had a client with this similar situation. It was actually a loan for a downpayment, but the family member had to write a letter to the mortgage company as if it were a gift so that it wouldn't affect my client's mortgage loan qualification. Otherwise no paperwork would have been completed. My client said he didn't feel he was liable for paying back because of the letter. However we had a discussion about why the money was given and it was not supposed to be a gift. So he made a plan to pay it back.
Dave, could you PLEASE have a "whatever happened to...?" program to find out how some of these stories have played out? (like this one!)
The guy who called in left a comment in the comments section on this video letting everyone know the aftermath and how his dear granny reacted.
Sounds like a narcissistic person. No empathy for those people
3:20 proves you're right
My sentiments exactly! Pitifully Sad!
Nah business woman
No empathy FROM them, either-they don't tend to have (or at least employ) it! 😅
Listen to Dave. Run from controlling, toxic family members and don't look back. I have done this several times and never been happier each time. I have watched too many people kiss the ground their controlling family members walks on believing they would get an inheritance. They got nothing. You are better off without them and their manipulations.
Hi folks. Im the grandma from the call. He's now on an income-based repayment plan with a 60 year amortization.
If grandma was doing this while he was growing up to his parents, he shouldn't have accepted the gift. Should be a lesson for others. Just grind it out on your own if you can't trust someone.
I wouldn't even write a letter. She might use that against you if she took you to court, or show the family snippets of it. Ghost her is the best option.
i am noticing an increase in greed in elderly people lately , my grand parents were never like this , and believe me they did a lot for me , when i say a lot , i mean a lot.
It's stunning hearing parents and grandparents scamming their offspring.
Baby-boomer generation is a whole new breed
If she's 64, shes not elderly yet. I also think that's not a boomer but Gen X. I'm not sure what the cutoff is there.
@@jenniferpearce1052That is a Boomer. Gen x doesn't start until 1964. I don't know any Gen X that are that selfish. Most of us want more for our children than our selfish Boomer Parents did for us.
Diagnosed as a liar 🤥
That poor boy bless his heart.This is sad.
I wouldn't pay her a dime. A gift is a gift. If it ruins your relationship, so be it.
I am saying this under the assumption that she made it clear that it was a gift at the time you received it.
She wouldn't get money back from me, and our relationship would be severed🤷🏽♀️. I couldn't deal with people like that
That’s why you are a scumbag and shouldn’t have taken the money to begin with
Jetfan 95 sounds like you got this all twisted. Did you not hear “gift”
@@jetfan9586 Well, it was under the premise of being a gift. She switched up on them and tried to change the terms after the fact. I'm sure they wouldn't have taken the money if she proposed it as a loan or at the very least they would have accounted for paying her back in the future. I'm not understanding what about them is a scumbag. The only scumbag here is grandma.
This grandma is great. You need to thank her for giving you your part of the will early so you can use it while it still has value. And learn how to be smart too. I would never have paid that money back myself. She also needs to wise up herself.
You’ve got an interesting perspective! :)
I would not pay her back and find witnesses to it being a gift and take her to court.
Their first mistake was offering to pay her back when she gifted the money to them. Just take the gift!
I think the grandmother let them BORROW $9,000 and she wants to be paid back. My sister did the same thing. I loaned her $4,000 and she did not want to pay me back. Family members like to play these stupid games! This is why I don’t lend money to family.
@@FisherCollegeMa did you listen? It was clearly stated as a gift.
Reina Bella he stated that they have proof it was a gift.
I agree with the others that "in the beginning", the grandmother DID stipulate that it was a gift. Listen to the video again.
@Michlee Jackson What “proof” do they have? He said she wrote them a letter and she NEVER mentioned that the money was a gift.
I wish my grandma would.... “it was nice being your grand daughter while it lasted, have a good one”
😂😂😂😂😂
Bye Felicia 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
😂😂
Dave’s discernment is mind blowing
I've been in this situation. Narc fell out the woodwork and tried to lord it over me that he was the person who ANONYMOUSLY gave me a gift 10 years earlier. Sent him the money back and told him where he could stick it! Game over, he can never use that card again, small price to pay to be done with this loser.
I almost always deny money when people offer it. Unless I did a job for them and they’re paying me in return.
The “gift” was most likely a loan! Why else would he offer to “pay her back.” I think he is the one who is the narcissist and liar 🤥🤦🏻♀️
You don't take gifts from your family? That's weird! You guys didn't take wedding gifts or birthday gifts?
@@apierre6 , I am the same, don't take gifts.
Same
Me too. I won’t even take a gift.
Sounds like grandma is a con artist and uses money to control the family.
I would simply send her a letter showing the paper work that proves "Legally" this is a gift and state, we really appreciate the gift Grandma and we have put that in our new home just as you requested. I would further advertise to the rest of the family how nice it was to receive this GIFT from Grandma. Then I would state very clearly that we have consulted legal counsel and we know legally we do not owe you this money or the interest. Simple as that and who cares what Grandma thinks, you will never win if she is narcissistic, so you should simply keep it on the legal side and never transact with this person again in a financial way.
No reason to respond at all. The minute someone says "if you don't do this I'll cut you out of the will" your response should be: "deal". Then never entertain the subject again.
This happened to a friend of mine with his father. About the same amount of $$$$. The father actually hired a lawyer and then told his son "that's between the lawyers , not us"
Omg😂😂😂😂
@ bbo40 Wow! What was the outcome in that case?
My friend and his wife borrowed from their 401Ks; gave the money to the dad with his lawyer present and told the dad to never come around again ; to see neither them or his grandchildren . Lasted that way till the day the dad passed away, 20 years later.
Can she see if she can convince my sister to give my money back too? I loaned her a dollar when I was 6 and I still hold a grudge.
Dude imagine the interest on that dollar by now as well.
Lol
Omg the interest must be extreme
@@UpshallGames Now my grudge on her is going to be more intense!
The difference is you always meant it as a loan.
My uncle gave us a $400 or $500 gift. Then about 6 years later he asked for it back. I regret giving it back.
Who wants money from someone like that anyway? It's a good thing you gave it back and got rid of the whole problem.